Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 1080. page

Aside from the mental illness, chrons, and opiate addiction especially you don't seem to have it that bad.

Who gives a fuck about the other stuff it just seems petty.

Just be happy you don't work to only pay off debts and have to wash your balls in a McDonalds everyday just to sleep behind an abandoned arbies and walk 3 hours to work due to no public transportation.

>>16980343
>I keep holding out for something good to happen

There's the essence of your problem. Nothing good is going to happen. You have to make it happen.

Prioritize and attack one problem at a time. I'd rank the heroin addiction high. Do what is necessary (and get what help is necessary) to get clean. Then move on to #2 on your priority list.

But it is not going to happen to (or for) you. You have to do it.

>>16980384
Maybe I shouldn't have phrased it that way. I have been working toward getting better. Working with mental health teams, am on methadone (Still use, though not nearly as much as I used too. Just can't seem to fully kick it). Really it comes down to me being in pain 24/7. I use because I'm in pain, and the pain prevents me from doing the things I need to do in order to get better. I can't get pain medication because of my history with drug abuse. I guess I need to come to terms with the fact I'm disabled, but I just can't. I've done numerous things through my mental health team to try and combat my bi-polar depression and suicidal tendencies (Drugs, therapy, CBT/DBT, mindfulness training) but it seems like each time I take 1 step forward I take 3 back.

I just can't take all this physical and mental anguish anymore. Someone who doesn't know the feeling of your head splitting open from mental disease / depression truly are blessed.

Live a present that you will be proud of.

I feel this so strongly OP.
It's been 5 years since high school and I've gotten less cringey every year.
But it still comes back to bite me on the ass, like a person I was cringe toward in HS talking shit about me to my coworkers, that kind of thing. I find most people have forgotten or don't care. A lot just dismiss it as the past. I'm different now, so that helps.

Basically this >>16980346 I really like who I am now and have plans to be even better. So that helps. Being cringey in the past means my absolute progress is even better, so that's cool.

>>16980352
So… uhh… what happened to feeling bad? Doesn't sound like you feel bad about yourself at all, Mr. Patshimselfonback!

situation:
>18
>never dated (besides taking a girl to a movie once, was beta and just took her home after and said bye. still wasn't really interested in dating in high school, focused on grades and other things)
>in college (this is last semester, so it all started in september / october
>extremely 10/10 qt i sorta knew before but didnt really talk to
>get number just for homework chat and stuff but end up talking really often
>by december we talk really often, snapchat etc
>after class ends (early december) it slowly dies off, stop talking as much
>mid january, i miss her so i start messaging again
>even stronger, talk every single day and have like a month long snap streak
>gain courage to ask out fucking finally
>we go to the beach, get coffee, watch the sunset on a blanket together, all is well
>don't make any moves because still trying to work past my beta and i didnt wanna seem creepy or too forward
>talk all the way home, she said she had a good time and that we should do this again soon
now here's where it gets bad.
>wait a day or two after the date, start texting again
>about 5 days later ask if she wants to go to a party my friends are throwing, she says she is tired
>a few days later ask if she wants to go to this cool place in a town nearby, she has to work
>more days later, ask if she simply wanted to get lunch, she is doing homework

cont.

Start small be OK with lunch work around hr schdual work with her line of comfortability and remain you op

things slowly started to ramp down here, about 2 weeks after the date. the snap streak died, we only text every few days, etc. at this point, she doesn't message me really at all anymore. i gave it a few days to see and i got nothing at all. i messaged her asking how she was and i got one reply saying she was "alright :/" i asked what was wrong and never got a reply.

the only things that seem like i still have a chance is that
1. she replies, instead of me getting ignored
2. she is nearly always one of the first 3 people to view my snapchat stories, so either she looks out for them or is seriously bored 24/7
3. why would she bother even going with me if she wasn't interested at all?
4. she was taking a dangerous drive in the rain at night once and i said "be safe, if you die i can't bug you on snapchat anymore :P" and she replied "you don't bug me :)"

still, i can't help but feel like if i message her daily now i'm just being annoying. I don't know what else to do at this point. all of my friends think we're talking and they always tell me to invite her with us, but i just think it'd be awkward now since we don't talk every day anymore.


i honestly just don't know how any of this works and if this is normal or if i fucked up somewhere and ruined it. I really like her. please help me /adv/

>>16980221

>how can i get over

this is the dumbest question people have ever asked. stop asking this question. getitng over something is how you get over it. its like asking how to breathe. we do not break those steps down, you just do it.

>>16980221
Get a job. That will calm you down a bit as you feel more independent and secure.

Good luck.

>>16980221
Doing something different tomorrow that might make you feel like you are actually doing something for your life.

go have a wank and decide

>>16980214

>a couple of months

if exams are months away then they are far enough way to break up during. if she cant survive a break up with a man she never had sex with that shes only been dating for 4 months, then she doesnt deserve to date.

if you wanna break up, do it asap

>>16980214
The other chick is a slut like you said, just go and fuck since you're going to break up anyway, go fuck the girl out of town, come back to your girlfriend with some lube and try a couple times before you end it because like you said....virgin

>>16980136
go easier on your uncle/aunt, instead of calling them greedy bastards look at this from their perspective, its not some magical place from their childhood but rather a liability, a building they have to take care of but never use.

something isn't beautiful because it lasts.

the fact that visiting it will be different is what makes the trip such a good idea. at the very least you'll have a sappy nostalgic trip where the beauty of it all is remembering what happened before.

its like visiting a childhood home. its not really 'fun' its a weirdly emotional experience that is sad yet somehow positive. its beautiful.

so go and say goodbye to the land.

and dont call your aunt and uncle greedy for selling property they have no use for, and dont call them greedy for not holding on to it and being forced to maintain it or not making any money off of it just cuz you had good memories about it. thats selfish of u

>>16980147
hes right, it was a property that someone had to pay property taxes/utilities for even though its not in use, slowly deteriorating for not being maintained and possible fines for not keeping up with municipal bylaws like keeping the lawn mowed.

Pic unrelated

Why do you want to live there?

You know it's one of the most expensive cities to live in, right?

>>16980128

hollywood fag

>have at least three months worth of living expenses saved up, ideally six months
>move there and sublet a spare bedroom for 3 months.
>apply for each and every job, entry level or not, just to make sure you get an income incoming
>from there start applying for jobs more within your field
>once you have steadyish income you can try and get your own apartment.

los angeles aint so bad. never tried san francisco but i hear its ridiculously expensive even compared to los angeles. but i also hear that is where ALL the new apps are being made, but idk if thats what you mean by computer science so i dont know.

Oh yeah I should mention that her family speaks english well (Dad's from Melbourne like me)

>>16979950

>so i dont look like a sperg

doesnt matter, they are all strangers you will literally never see again, save for her family I mean. But she will be there to baby sit you anyways so its not a big deal.

becuase you are white they either automatically hate or adore you. very little you do or say will change that impression.

>how far can you get wiht only english. as long as you keep track of what direction you are going (though mapping apps might make this even easier) you can get pretty far. its tokyo, english is most everyones second language, as it is taught in schools, and not to the shitty degree spanish is taught in american schools.

even in okinawa (really fucking small japanese island) you can get by without knowing any real japanese.

>odd social norms

most of these wont be noticed. things like 'its rude to walk while also drinking a drink' come to mind. taking off shoes is a popular one. but for the most part people are too glued to their cell phone sthere to really notice anything around them. you'll get a little attention cuz you are white though.

>weed

dunno google 'japanese marijuana laws' but im guessing its not a big thing there. alcohol fucks you up there easy cuz they dont metabolise it right, so they dont really need weed

>>16979963

Sweet dude, yeah my gf has no idea about the weed thing. She smokes with her dad so she has a different perspective on it. I'm going to buy her old man some craft brewery, probably can't go wrong with that, no?

Other question, how pricey are things in Japan compared to Australia/America, trying to plan a budget for a week.

>>16979850
How about you get some fucking self control be a man and stay healthy you haven't even gained the weigh back but yet you've alrdy accepted being fat again keep at it and drink less

>>16979850
Keep your old one, and get a few pieces that you look super sharp in.

Every couple of weeks (or month or whatever), get a new thing. I'd focus on quality, etc. There's no rush. If you change size, there's less risk if you replenish your wardrobe gradually.

>>16979850

buy 4 pairs of cheap fucking jeans. two packs of those cheap plain shirts. congrats, a weeks of clothes for 50 bucks. the jeans should be not super form fitting in case you put on a little bit of weight, but thats what belts are for.

keep old clothes in case you hella balloon again.

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>>16979763
>> cute girl about an 8.5 comforts me

>>16979763
Underage v&. Nice try. Go on, suck his dick and take it up the ass. It's all worth it in the end. You'll have a sore ass but you'll be the cool kid with the stretched ass.

step 1: be famous, or work on something with a rabid fanbase

step 2: start a crowdfunding campaign

>>16979694

prove your potential. if your proof of concept or plea video doesn't show any potential, why would anyone donate?

you can create great and amazing things with the shittiest of equipment these days.

put together a 5 minute proof of concept and see what happens. but no one wnats to throw money at a random person whos going to squande that sucking.

>>16979694
Firstly, crowdfunding is not a very good exposure tool. What I mean by that, you should not use crowd funding if you do not already have people following/interested in your project. You get peoples' eyes on you, THEN you say "you should support us", not both at the same time. This is essentially where 90% of campaigns fail.

You should have been talking to press, utilising social media and following an entire communications strategy for the AT LEAST 3 months period in the lead up to the campaign.

So in short, you are fucked. The only way you might pull it back is if you sit down and write a clever pitch as a press release ("Indie Film Breaks Barriers by Being Super Weird in Lots of Ways!!!) and getting it posted on as many film/indie sites as possible.

Lastly I would say that entering into any indie scene is very difficult if you are expecting the world to just shit money onto your chest. Indie projects are typically labors of love, and only really people with an existing following can expect to be funded externally. You might get lucky, but it is very rare.

>>16979681
I would just assume it's a cruel joke.
Think about it. She doesn't even know you. How could she possibly be into you?

I'd throw the number out and forget it ever happened.

>>16979696
I am assuming he's joking but don't listen to this guy OP. Was she cute? Ask her to go get some coffee. Don't be too awkward or flirty, just be normal. If she seems kinda into you, compliment her a bit and see where it goes

>>16979704
No really. Why would a girl just randomly hand over a phone number? No conversation, not even a hey do you like x I like x. That's so creepy and detached.

It can only be a setup for something.
Maybe she gets off to having her boyfriend beat people up.

This is how introverts actually think by the way. If you're a girl NEVER just give out your phone number. He'll assume all this and more.

Is that pretty much what tinder is for?

I would still rather get back together with my gf but all we do is fight every day anymore I'm trying to do everything she's always wanted of me and the harder I try the more distant she gets I don't think she's into me anymore and it feels hopeless

>>16979658

There are plenty of women out there who want to get fucked w/o the stupid responsibilities that come with a relationship.I'm currently in this sort of arrangement with 2 girls I met off tinder and I made my intentions clear with the first one (no relationship, I just want your hot tight body) and the other one started the conversation after our 3rd intercourse.

You could increase your chances of serx right away without looking or sounding fucking desperate for sex, women see right through that and noone wants to fuck you if you reek of desperation.Get fit, get healthy, get groomed, smile, flirt, get laid.

Everyone has a glass jaw until they get hit enough to learn how not to fall like a ton of bricks

My jaw cracks and pops and I'm getting surgery for it so I'd guess I have one.

But how is this relevant to anything other than you trying to get into boxing or something?

>>16979633

I recently got into kick boxing.

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>>16979520

0/10

go back to /pol/, your edge is a little too sharp for this board.

If she likes it, and you either like it or can tolerate it, I don't really see the problem.

>>16979529
Eh, I've heard crazier.

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>>16979536

>If she likes it, and you either like it or can tolerate it, I don't really see the problem.