Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 1080. page
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26, disabled (Chrons disease and bi-polar), heroin addicted, premature ejaculator (I hardly even fap anymore because it just reinforces me feeling like a failure), no job, haven't finished high-school, barely any true friends (though have a lot of people that like me in the community I live in) because of past wrong-doings and letting relationships fall by the wayside. No romantic interests but even if there were I'm too chickenshit to do anything about it (even though I had a phase from 16-23 where I dated and was a lot more social) most of this comes from a social...
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Aside from the mental illness, chrons, and opiate addiction especially you don't seem to have it that bad.
Who gives a fuck about the other stuff it just seems petty.
Just be happy you don't work to only pay off debts and have to wash your balls in a McDonalds everyday just to sleep behind an abandoned arbies and walk 3 hours to work due to no public transportation.
>>16980343
>I keep holding out for something good to happen
There's the essence of your problem. Nothing good is going to happen. You have to make it happen.
Prioritize and attack one problem at a time. I'd rank the heroin addiction high. Do what is necessary (and get what help is necessary) to get clean. Then move on to #2 on your priority list.
But it is not going to happen to (or for) you. You have to do it.
>>16980384
Maybe I shouldn't have phrased it that way. I have been working toward getting better. Working with mental health teams, am on methadone (Still use, though not nearly as much as I used too. Just can't seem to fully kick it). Really it comes down to me being in pain 24/7. I use because I'm in pain, and the pain prevents me from doing the things I need to do in order to get better. I can't get pain medication because of my history with drug abuse. I guess I need to come to terms with the fact I'm...
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How do I stop feeling bad/cringy about my past? I sometimes think of my life in retrospect, and I feel so down because I was a loser and acted like a legitimate autist K-12, and it translates a little into my everyday life
Live a present that you will be proud of.
I feel this so strongly OP.
It's been 5 years since high school and I've gotten less cringey every year.
But it still comes back to bite me on the ass, like a person I was cringe toward in HS talking shit about me to my coworkers, that kind of thing. I find most people have forgotten or don't care. A lot just dismiss it as the past. I'm different now, so that helps.
Basically this >>16980346 I really like who I am now and have plans to be even better. So that helps. Being cringey in the past...
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>>16980352
So… uhh… what happened to feeling bad? Doesn't sound like you feel bad about yourself at all, Mr. Patshimselfonback!
so you guys actually did help me out a ton the first time, but i think i fucked things up so i'm back again to see if it's still salvageable. I never posted the full situation before but this is my last hope and i'm hoping you guys can make the most informed suggestions.
It's kinda long, so i'm gonna post everything below.
situation:
>18
>never dated (besides taking a girl to a movie once, was beta and just took her home after and said bye. still wasn't really interested in dating in high school, focused on grades and other things)
>in college (this is last semester, so it all started in september / october
>extremely 10/10 qt i sorta knew before but didnt really talk to
>get number just for homework chat and stuff but end up talking...
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Start small be OK with lunch work around hr schdual work with her line of comfortability and remain you op
things slowly started to ramp down here, about 2 weeks after the date. the snap streak died, we only text every few days, etc. at this point, she doesn't message me really at all anymore. i gave it a few days to see and i got nothing at all. i messaged her asking how she was and i got one reply saying she was "alright :/" i asked what was wrong and never got a reply.
the only things that seem like i still have a chance is that
1. she replies, instead of me getting ignored
2. she is nearly always one of the first 3 people to view my snapchat stories,...
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When It’s 2am and you realize that your peers don’t like you and that you’re not cool. And that you’re touching you mid-twenties, a month away from graduating college, haven’t even solidified your career and future goals, and you’re still worrying about “being cool”.
My mind is fucked. How can get over this shit?
>>16980221
>how can i get over
this is the dumbest question people have ever asked. stop asking this question. getitng over something is how you get over it. its like asking how to breathe. we do not break those steps down, you just do it.
>>16980221
Get a job. That will calm you down a bit as you feel more independent and secure.
Good luck.
>>16980221
Doing something different tomorrow that might make you feel like you are actually doing something for your life.
I'm in a sticky situation. I've been with my girlfriend for like 4 months now, and we still havent had sex. Like, we've tried, but theres just one problem; she'd uber-tight, like two fingers is too much for her. And my dick isnt huge but it's above-average so you can see the problem here. I'm getting real frustrated by this. I've been thinking about breaking up with her too. She's really sweet and nice, but she's a bit too clingy, and too into the relationship (read: she likes me more than I like her).
I also have a girl who...
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go have a wank and decide
>>16980214
>a couple of months
if exams are months away then they are far enough way to break up during. if she cant survive a break up with a man she never had sex with that shes only been dating for 4 months, then she doesnt deserve to date.
if you wanna break up, do it asap
>>16980214
The other chick is a slut like you said, just go and fuck since you're going to break up anyway, go fuck the girl out of town, come back to your girlfriend with some lube and try a couple times before you end it because like you said....virgin
My grandparents used to have an amazing house on 2 acres of land right on the water in pic related, Ft. Walton Beach, FL. My whole childhood and up through my early 20s, summer trips to my grandparents' place were amazing. I loved my grandparents deeply, and always loved this place.
Sadly, my grandfather passed away, my grandma is disabled now and is in a home, and my greedy uncle/aunt forced us to sell the property instead of keeping it in the family so they could have the cold hard cash. The last time I saw it, I was delivering my grandfather's eulogy and...
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>>16980136
go easier on your uncle/aunt, instead of calling them greedy bastards look at this from their perspective, its not some magical place from their childhood but rather a liability, a building they have to take care of but never use.
something isn't beautiful because it lasts.
the fact that visiting it will be different is what makes the trip such a good idea. at the very least you'll have a sappy nostalgic trip where the beauty of it all is remembering what happened before.
its like visiting a childhood home. its not really 'fun' its a weirdly emotional experience that is sad yet somehow positive. its beautiful.
so go and say goodbye to the land.
and dont call your aunt and uncle greedy for selling property they have no use for, and dont call them greedy for...
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>>16980147
hes right, it was a property that someone had to pay property taxes/utilities for even though its not in use, slowly deteriorating for not being maintained and possible fines for not keeping up with municipal bylaws like keeping the lawn mowed.
I want to live and work in San Francisco or Los Angeles in when I graduate, how do I get there? I am computer science major, but my skills are very weak and I'm a 3rd year in a public university in Southern California.
Pic unrelated
Why do you want to live there?
You know it's one of the most expensive cities to live in, right?
>>16980128
hollywood fag
>have at least three months worth of living expenses saved up, ideally six months
>move there and sublet a spare bedroom for 3 months.
>apply for each and every job, entry level or not, just to make sure you get an income incoming
>from there start applying for jobs more within your field
>once you have steadyish income you can try and...
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Girlfriend is half Japanese.
Been dating her for a little over a year. Her mom is a travel agent and hooked me up with a deal to visit her family.
Problem is I don't speak a lick of Japanese and my gf has told me about how Japan has a lot of odd social norms compared to the west.
What the fuck do I do so I don't look like a sperg. We're going to Nagoya and then Tokyo.
Give me the things I should know about Nagoya and Tokyo and whar I should look out for. Also how far can I get speaking only English and French before I have to use my girlfriend...
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Oh yeah I should mention that her family speaks english well (Dad's from Melbourne like me)
>>16979950
>so i dont look like a sperg
doesnt matter, they are all strangers you will literally never see again, save for her family I mean. But she will be there to baby sit you anyways so its not a big deal.
becuase you are white they either automatically hate or adore you. very little you do or say will change that impression.
>how far can you get wiht only english. as long as you keep track of what direction you are going (though mapping apps...
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>>16979963
Sweet dude, yeah my gf has no idea about the weed thing. She smokes with her dad so she has a different perspective on it. I'm going to buy her old man some craft brewery, probably can't go wrong with that, no?
Other question, how pricey are things in Japan compared to Australia/America, trying to plan a budget for a week.
I've lost 60 lbs, and I am probably as thin as I am going to get, at least with my frame. None of my clothes fit anymore... They're all too big and either look like I'm swimming in them or they're falling off.
I want to buy new clothes but I'm worried I'll gain the weight back, because I'm an alcoholic.
How long should I wait before buying a new wardrobe?
>>16979850
How about you get some fucking self control be a man and stay healthy you haven't even gained the weigh back but yet you've alrdy accepted being fat again keep at it and drink less
>>16979850
Keep your old one, and get a few pieces that you look super sharp in.
Every couple of weeks (or month or whatever), get a new thing. I'd focus on quality, etc. There's no rush. If you change size, there's less risk if you replenish your wardrobe gradually.
>>16979850
buy 4 pairs of cheap fucking jeans. two packs of those cheap plain shirts. congrats, a weeks of clothes for 50 bucks. the jeans should be not super form fitting in case you put on a little bit of weight, but thats what belts are for.
keep old clothes in case you hella balloon again.
