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Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 711. page


Started reading "Learned Optimism: How to Change your Mind and Your Life" by Martin Seligman today. I am about of a quarter of the way through and can already say I'd recommend it to anyone, regardless of if you are happy or not. Other books I'd recommend are "How to Win Friends and Influence People", and "How to be a Man (and other illusions)" by Duff McMahan.

Anyone have any books that improved their life or helped them through a rough time?
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I have many. Here are my top picks, they are mostly informative so you'll have to actually apply the mechanics to get a happier life.

>Thinking Fast & Slow by Daniel Kahneman
A short pop-psy book that talks about Systems I & II - the architecture of our minds and how we think. It's very simple and every freshman in college should read this. If not for the mind modeling then for all the information on cognitive biases. Knowing this stuff will help you make objectively correct decisions in life and spot errors in others' thinking.

>Book of Pook
Free pdf, just google it. I didn't read it all but it's a quick and forward take on social dynamics. Just read the lessons and skim some chapters. The book is a great introduction to understanding the opposite sex and can help you build confidence in interacting with them.

>Way of Men by Jack Donovan
Meme /pol/ book that's pretty good. The Pook one talks about understanding women, this one talks about understanding men. The chapter on the bonobos stood out the most for me.

>Sleight of Mouth by Robert Dilts
Still reading this one. It's pretty heavy and abstract with the concepts, but can help you create mental models of human discourse. Understanding social interactions and thought patterns can help you understand why other people do the things they do. By breaking down interaction, you can plan this stuff out or practice improving it - or go above and beyond and do social engineering stuff.

1/2
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>>17174026

2/2

>Actualized videos on YT
This bald guy knows his shit. It's worth listening to him even though the advice is very basic, almost elementary. I like the piece on meditation the most. Worth downloading the audio and listening to that whilst driving.

>Psycho Cybernetics by Maxwell Maltz
Takes like 2 weeks to build habits. Habits/systems are objectively better than pursuing goals.

>Mastery: The Keys to Success
Same thing as above, but shorter. tl;dr Maintaining systems is better than working "towards" a goal.

>Men's Fitness Bible
Or any workout book really. Conflicting views on which workout book is good/bad exist, but pick one and stick with it. Pretty much the idea is to get /fit/. Depends on how much you know of this stuff already, so read accordingly in this domain. Start with the /fit/ sticky. Exercise is very important and everyone should do it.

>Meditations by Julius Evola
Another meme /pol/ book. The guy has an insane writing style and I'm sure he's right on half the stuff he talks about. It's a hard read, but the take away is to meditate. This helps you overcome emotion and become more Stoic. Stoicism is a pretty good life philosophy imo.
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>>17174053
>>Meditations by Julius Evola

It's actually Doctrine of Awakening.

Meditations was Marcus Aurelius

my bad

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so this girl who dumped me after being together for three years is talking to another guy and basically dating him. yesterday she told me my dick is longer and thicker than his so she doesn't want to fuck him now and only fuck me on the low basically.. opinions on this? should I tell the guy?
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If you wanna smash that pussy again, you'd better not. Just fuck her on the dl and find other chicks. But do NOT under any circumstances think she is more than a quick fuck for when you're horny. Also - feel free to cum inside her without contraception. What's she gonna do? Admit to being a whore?
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i like the thought of smashing her pussy and then she goes and sees this little manlet with a tiny dick. i wanna show her I can fuck other girls but I can't seem to find anyone else really
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>>17173949
lel she's admitted to being my little slut regardless who's she's dating so she definitely wants me but a couple weeks ago she really broke my heart when she dumped me

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>Be me, 18, virgino
>Go on date with qt 3.14
>"Wanna come back to mine anon"
>Fuckyea.png
>Making out, she starts rubbing my pants, got big boner
>she pulls it out and starts sucking
>Boner gets soft as she sucks
>whatthefuck.jpeg
>Goes soft, can't even fucking put it in
>"the more you get nervous, the worse it'll get, It's okay anon, you can finger me instead"
>She gets off on that and we cuddle after

This is the most embarrassing shit that's ever happened to me. She's probably gonna tell everyone, but that I can deal with I guess. what could cause an 18 year old to not get hard?
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>>17173919

maybe ur a homo
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>>17173923
Probably troll but I doubt it, I get hard off of straight and lesbian porn all the time
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this your first time?

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A married guy I used to work with just texted me a picture of his erect dick.

I sent him back a "?" a few minutes later and he texted me back "SORRY SORRY MEANT THAT FOR (his wife)."

His wife and I do share the same first name. Is that plausible or did he just want me to see his wiener?

I'm also probably at least 15 years older than him if that makes any difference.
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>>17173868
It's possible that it was a mistake since you and his wife share the same name.

Has he ever showed any sexual interest in you?
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You're an idiot.
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It plausable...
But it is also sexual harassment.

Keep it as leverage over him at work.
If he starts getting out of line goto hr.

>work more hours than manager
>get paid less
>he doesnt come in at all on Saturdays
>Im the only employee that works here besides him

Ive told him time and time again he has to bring another person in but he just wont do it.

I work 6 days a week. It was only supposed to be part time but they have me on full time hours.

I can barely get one day off in advance yet he took 2 vacations in the last 2 months, leaving me at the store by myself for a week.

The owner is not the manager. That being said, i am very close to the owner of the store, and Ive already told him about all these problems. He said he told the manager what to do and how to fix but still nothing has come of it.

My job is not very expendable. It takes you multiple months to understand what to do, and about 6-8 months before you can run the store without asking for help. That being said Id like to get another day off at least, and hopefully try to convince management to bring in another person.

Ive done so already but no action has been taken.

If I were to leave, the store would be fucked since its starting to get busy and there would be no time to train someone to prepare them.

I just dont know what to do famalams.

Excuse the gif i used. Cancerous but catches the eye. I only found out 3 hours ago where it was from. a good reaction pic sadly stuck in shit show.
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Are you salary or hourly?

If salary ask to be switchef to hourly.

Dont fool yourself you are replaceable.
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>>17173865
if i was replacable they would have replaced me by now.

ive been going to work late everyday for the last 3 months and im lazy as shit.

im applying for other jobs now that i got my IT certs in the mail, but for the time being im just staying here.
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>>17173869
Your replaceable

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>how long did the honeymoon phase last with your bf/gf?
>was there a reason it ended or did it just fade?
>do you wish it back or do you love what you got instead more?
>was there something you could have done to prolonge that phase?
>what over and when was your first argument?
>has sex declined after the honeymoon phase?
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>>17173858
Well we've been togehter for three years and are still in the honeymoon fase. We don't have as much sex but thats only because i have a medical condition under treatment for the last year so we arent allowed. I guess if you're having a great relationship it's just great
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>>17173858

>how long did the honeymoon phase last with your bf/gf?

3 monthish

>was there a reason it ended or did it just fade?

We spent too much time together, i fell in love too young and with a girl that really didn't know what she wanted, me myself included.

>do you wish it back or do you love what you got instead more?

Nope don't want it back.

>was there something you could have done to prolonge that phase?

Just stay real solid and not let silly love cloud my judgment and make me stupid. I realize respect comes first.

>what over and when was your first argument?

7 months in, i got real upset about a text from a guy, i confronted her and she didn't respond for an hour so i looked like a nagging bitch.

>has sex declined after the honeymoon phase?

not really.

A lot of women have no idea what they want, so don't fall into the love trap. You have to be willing to walk away from your girlfriend at anytime and hold her to strict/high expectations in order to keep you around. You are the prize.
>>
I've known her for 6 months and we've only just talked out our feelings and planned out first date two days ago. We've fought over the dumbest shit numerous times already as friends. I'm still in some sort of honeymoon phase and it's weird. Past relationships - didn't really like the girls so never really gave half a shit. First girlfriend I had there was like a month of honeymoon phase before we broke up and I cried myself to sleep for a week.

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22 yr old kv NEET who wants to finally become normal

what i do? where do I start? Im basically asking for a recovery guide.
8 posts and 1 images submitted.
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Just Kys
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>>17173856

why?

im sure its possible for me to integrate into society
>>
Become a truck driver.
Got to /o and read the neet to driver guide.


You will have a 40-90k a year job. But you can maintian some neet aspects.

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Is it ok to cheat and steal to get results?

I'm a business major and many of my classes very much allude to the ends justifying the means. There's also talk of taking advantage to better your business. The other day we discussed ways we can utilize a failing supplier and/or a failing competitor. It's not necessarily evil or anything, but it does seem very compatible.
12 posts and 1 images submitted.
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I want to mention this is an accredited state college. I also could ask /biz/ but I already know what the answer would be.
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>>17173819
Define "OK". Whether or not it's ethically permissible depends on your ethics. If you're in business, you should mainly care about what is legal though.
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>>17173827
A couple terms ago I had an ethics in business course that only talked about legality, so I get what you're saying.

OK in the sense that it's legal. No comment on it being morally ethical.

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So I'm considering eating shrooms (I have past expireinces with meditation if that changes anything) I'm 18 y/o and I have no mental illness currently but I did have past depression when I was 13 but I soon got over it at the age of 15. So should I do it? Please help (this also has nothing to do with peer pressure (also I had never had a psyc
10 posts and 1 images submitted.
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I just felt s but weird when I did them. Have fun.
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>>17173818
never do drugs anon
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>>17173818
You are literally poisoning yourself, lol. Psych-users, much like the 420 crowd, tend to be pretentious as fuck, and believe it is a life changing experience.

Have fun, but don't become one of the aforementioned idiots.

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How do I cure my homosexuality, /adv/? It's not impossible, right?
36 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>17173811
Same way you cure heterosexuality.
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>>17173811
What do you mean? If you're attracted to both genders, just keep it in your pants with regards to one of them, if you are exclusively homosexual then you'll have to fake it.
Why do you want to anyway?
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>>17173817
>Why do you want to anyway?
Morals.

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Hey guys, I was hoping some of you anons on disability could help give me some tips for securing it. I have a plethora of health issues, both physical and mental, but you know how it goes. Got denied once already and gave up. I have a couple of questions:

Can I hire a lawyer before re-applying (It's been nearly a year since last time)?

and how long did it take you to get it?

Anything else to add would be very much appreciated! The whole process makes me very anxious. :(
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Your country is pretty important
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>>17173802
US, friendo
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it would help to say what your disabilities are to merit being paid to live.

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I've been dating my ex for a month and some days now and I'm not sure if I should continue. A friend of hers had plans to move into an apartment together before I came along and they are moving together in a few days. This friend of hers has a huge crush on her but she says he's in the friend zone. Here's the problem, she lied to me about where she was moving, she told me she was moving into her brother's house and I wouldn't be able to stay at her brother's place because he wouldn't be comfortable with a guy their with his wife. He works out of town or something. She told me she lied because she didn't know how'd I react to her moving in with her friend. Honestly I know I'm over reacting but I don't enjoy being lied to. She's cheated on me in the past but we were like 15 when that happened. We are both adults now. I don't really know if I should get over it or just end the relationship
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What the fuck dude

NO!
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>>17173759
No what?
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>>17173765
This kind of bullshit DOES NOT fly, what the hell

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Will my reading speed naturally increase if I just read often? Or do I need to go out of my way to look up the methods of reading faster?

Finding it hard to concertrate too long on reading unless I'm on the bike at the gym. Any advice?
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I wish had the ability to concentrate on reading while exercising.
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Why do you want to increase your reading speed?

There are speed reading techniques but they can often come at the cost of retention rate.

If you read enough, you will natural get faster to a point, but everyone has their own natural reading cadence (personally, I read really fast, but if you fuck with my cadence, I can't read at all... which is why it really screws me over when author's try and fuck with vernacular--fuck ebonics -.-)
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>Literally listen to audiobooks at max speed.

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I'm starting a YouTube channel and I want big ratings fast so I'm trying to talk about controversial hot button topics such as racism, gay/tranny, sex, sexism and porn. What I want to do is post videos that will reveal the real names of popular female porn actresses. There is a site called "porn wiki leaks" that revealed this information but it's kind of hard to find. I'm sure I can get big ratings off this easier to find content. I plan on doing 1 vid per porn star. My problem is could they suspend or delete my videos for parroting previously revealed public knowledge? Could I get sued? I just want to get rich fast without problems.
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You've assumed people care about the real names of porn stars though.
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>>17173630
This. Especially if it's already on some website somewhere. People who care will already have looked it up. No one's going to give a fuck unless you have some knowledge that they can't find elsewhere
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>>17173630
Allot of men watch porn so yes I think I'm correct in that assumption especially concerning the likes of Alexis Texas, Asa Akira, Flower Tucci, Taryn Thomas and Tara Patrick

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I am from a small city in southern Europe and the average person here cannot speak English fluently. Will I leave an impression on the Anglo customers at my company/Anglo coworkers visiting my city because of their jobs if I speak English fluently?
Just a question I am asking out of curiosity. (I know it's nothing major)
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>>17173574
so you're Italian. Yes, of course it's a good impression.
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>>17173580
No I live in Spain
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>>17173574
Since English speakers are generally not fluent in other languages, they will be grateful for the help. (But find some subtle way, without insulting them, of making it clear you are offering them this courtesy, so they don't take you for granted.)

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