Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 710. page
- Home
- Board: /adv/ - Advice
- Reading: Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 710. page
So i joined a dating site, against my better judgement ( i don't have a single mom fetish) just to check it out. The thing is, I really lied a lot on my profile. I did use a real pic of my though, so is it still bad?
I read here and other places that girls don't message guys, or at least rarely do. I've only been on the site for 24 hours and I've already been messaged several times. Is it because of the bs i put in my writeup? or do you think that mainly the look at the pic of you? if its the latter, then i don't feel too bad, since almost all women i've met lie constantly lol.
Should i feel bad about hooking up with any of them, if they claim to "not be looking for fwb.etc" i assume they mostly mean "not looking for an unnattractive hookup"?
TL;DR is lying online really that bad? I used a real and current pic, and not even shopped/lighting to look better, just average day.
>>17174364
What specifically did you lie about?
>>17174364
Well it depends , if you claimed to be fortune 500 buiness owner while you're really unemployed then it's probably what you wrote instead of your picture.
If you wrote you like to go mountain climbing and kids while you really hate them it's probably the pic.
>>17174364
it depends what you lied about.
if you said
>I'm 6'0"
when really you're 5'10" its not so bad. but if you're really 5'6" you are probably going to get a lot of women confused and upset.
if you said you are looking to date and are only looking to hook up, you might make people mad after the fact or find girls that arent putting out as fast as you'd like.
it all just depends. we cant tell what a girl responded to without knowing what you wrote. its likely a combination of both, but to what degree we dont know.
>girls never message guys
this is something ugly guys or plainly average guys say. despite how humble guys think they are, they all tend to rate themselves a point higher or at least say 'IVE SEEN UGLY GUYS WITH HOT GIRLS SO THAT MUST MEAN I COULD GET ONE SIMPLY FOR EXISTING'. so they dont realize they arent attractive at all.
i get a steady stream of messages from girls. not always hot ones mind you, but i get a steady stream
I was homeschooled, and I've never been enrolled in a public school. I know no science, geometry, biology, or algebra, and very little english, history, and math. The only reason I have good grammar is the internet.
I had trouble focusing as a kid, it was hard for me to sit down and learn something, so my mother would get frustrated when I didn't understand something, and pretty much put a pin in it until she felt like dealing with me again, which lasted the lengths of anywhere between a few days to that entire semester. I don't know if I have ADD or something, but that's not necessarily my current problem.
I recently "graduated", but it would be painfully obvious to anyone that my diploma looks fake, and I'm not actually anywhere near highschool level. I want to get a GED, but I'm nowhere near halfway educated enough even for that.
My current plan is to just say I dropped out and work minimum wage jobs until I die, which doesn't sound fun. What do I do?
Pic unrelated.
>>17174260
enroll in a GED prep class
>>17174260
Don't say you're a dropout - that makes you a loser rather than a victim of your parents.
Some of those subjects you can learn as much as you need by just reading about them. For others, check your local community college for introductory or GED level classes, on your way to the GED exam. After that, you might have caught the learning bug enough to want to go on in CC.
>>17174260
I just passed all four GED tests last week with about 5 months of studying/practicing 2 days a week. My highest education was 7th grade spread through about 6 different public schools until I was removed from school and that was ~8 years ago.
You'll be able to pass the language arts and social studies easily since those only require reading passages and understanding what it means. The questions are almost all multiple choice and 2 of the answers are so obviously wrong that you have a 50% chance of guessing if for some reason you don't know the right answer. Social studies has some graph reading so you'll want to understand charts and graphs.
Science is pretty easy since there's pretty much no actual science involved. Just thinking, reading comprehension, bottom tier algebra, more graphs, and balancing chemical equations which was easy, just memorize the strategy from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eNsVaUCzvLA where he lists each letter and how many there are.
Math you'll want to study for. You can make it through a lot of the test just with your basic math knowledge but towards the end they'll start testing your ability to substitute numbers with variables and variables with numbers and eventually equations of a line.
Here's some pretty good resources for teaching yourself.
https://www.khanacademy.org/ this helped with my math immensely, I worked my way up from the bottom just to cover anything I had missed in school (which was everything other than addition, subtraction, and single digit multiplication)
http://www.amazon.com/dp/1625233051/ this book is ok, there's practice tests and it has most of the concepts covered. You'll really only use it for math and a little bit of science since the other two subjects are pretty much common sense if you have a basic understanding of english.
http://www.wtamu.edu/academic/anns/mps/math/mathlab/col_algebra/ I used this to supplement weak sections from Khan Academy's algebra.
You can do this.
How do I stop resetting? I swear it feels like whenever I get into a positive lifestyle I either get hit with apathy or depression and start spiraling out until I'm at the bottom of a well of binge drinking and realize I need to dust myself off
This is barely sustainable now and after college its probably going to ruin my life but I'm not sure what to do to prevent my self destructive side from overtaking me in the future.
oh...
>>17174252
thats a sissyphus complex. you keep pushing that rock up, it keeps sliding back down.
perhaps your change is too radical. consider changing things one month at a time, slowly making habits.
if you have trouble with binge drinking consider going to AA. if your answer to that is anything along the lines of
>nah i dont need that
>nah i dont like that idea
>etc
then you are going to fail. theres an entire organizaztion and program set up to help people NOT relapse into binge drinking and you are refusing to do it for no fucking reason. so do it.
that being said, heres some plans to change life 1 month at a time.
>>17174394
how to change your life:
you probably went to bed many many nights and said that tomorrow you are going to
>wake up early
>work out
>eat healthy
>clean the entire apartment
>start the job hunt
>start educating yourself on something new
>start that book
>etc
and hwen you wake up you cross off maybe 1 or 2 things then give up the next day. the reason for this is we are not meant to radically change our lives overnight. otherwise we'd all be perfect. it takes time. 28 days to be precise. doing one thing for 28 days makes it a 'habit' and something you arent likely to drop.
so what you need to do is create a monthly schedule. each month you tackle a really big change. i went through this two years ago when my life was a mess
>january: just fix my fucking sleep cycle. early to bed, early to rise
>february: start working out, at an actual fucking gym too
>march: eat healthy! not just carrots and shit, btu spend ttwo weeks without any junk to prove i can get it out of my system
>april start my new hobby / education (For me it was making a web series)
>may: start a consistent chore chart that i adhere to strictly.
you can do other little thigns each month as well. like starting to apply for jobs should probably be month 1 assuming you dont igve it its own dedicated month. when you do get a job or some major life style change, please remember that your new habits wont carry over immediately. the first week is you getting used to the job. then next week you work working out in to your routine. then eating healthy,. then chores. slowly adapting those hobbies to suit your new job or education.
its okay if you dont immediately catch on with something, thats why you have a month to get it right. the first two weeks are the struggle. by the end of it you'[re on it.
She says she loves me.
How do I know if I love her?
>>17174251
It's better if you don't. Caring less than her gives you the advantage.
>>17174251
I answer these for myself
Do i like her physically
Do i like her mentally
Can i spend a lot of time with her without getting bored with her
Can i relax next to her
If its yes to all that and she has some shared interests and is a decent person its a done deal
I opened up to a guy I'd met up with a few times about some of my sexual interests.
The plan was to have sex later today and suddenly he's not responding :(
How do I get over the feeling that I was rejected for my sexual preferences? :(
>>17174236
>sexual interests
I am curious what can guys make scared.
>he's not responding
Are we talking about no response in the last 6 hours or 6 days?
>rejected for my sexual preferences
You don't know this for sure.
>>17174236
Did you ask him to fuck him in the ass or something?
I think thats the only type of shit guys would bail immediately
The last piece of info I told him is that I've been sexting with this guy who doesn't live nearby. This guy has a cuckold fetish, and he wants to see me fuck said guy who is bailing.
Hasn't responded since Friday. (Since the convo about the cuckold thing)
The guy I was dating for a few weeks said he didn't like virgins because they couldn't do anything, which made me really insecure since I was a virgin. I talked to my best friend about it and he suggested we do it so he could teach me a few things and I wouldn't embarass myself, out of shame I agreed and we did it a couple times.
I then told the other guy about it when I was a tad drunk thinking hed find it funny that I wanted his approval so bad but he has since stopped replying to me and wont answer my calls.
What did I do wrong and what the hell do i do?
this has to be bait
>>17174173
poe's law
some girl, somewhere has done this exact same thing
> What did I do wrong
You were dating a guy, you fucked another guy and then told him about it.. What did you honestly think was going to happen?
So this story is a little strange but bear with me.
I was summoned to court. The summons paper is like ridiculously important because it has ALL the information you need.
I live in a house with a big family. There are 8 people living in my house. I had a basket of laundry that I put my summons paper in. For some reason a sibling threw it away and its gone. I call the court house like 3 days before my service date. She basically tells me to call the court house on a certain day at a certain time. I wrote down everything she said. I just tried calling the jury clerk seeing if they want me to come to court. I get a recording telling me to refer to the number on my summons paper on my service date. So what the fuck? I don't want to spend jail time or pay a fine. I realize I should have taken better care of my summons paper but why are they jerking me around like this? Am I going to get in trouble for not reporting to court? I did everything in my power to follow the rules after my summons paper got tossed. I tried calling other parts of the court but they all just redirect me to that damn recording that tells me to refer to my summons paper and leave a message which I did.
Man why the fuck did this have to happen to me? My mom, dad, grandpa and grandma have never heard of "jury duty" yet as soon as I become an adult they gotta bug me with this shit.
>>17174160
Yes, you will get in trouble if you just ignore it. You won't go to jail (probably) but will probably be fined.
Phone the courthouse again - or even better, go in person. Tell them the whole story. While you're standing there they can look up your original summons and print out a duplicate.
>>17174261
Printing out a duplicate wont help much. Im already past the time. Today is the date and I was told to call a number and Id be told weather or not I have jury duty. But as I said all I got was an answering machine. I did leave a message with the jury clerk though. I've tried other areas of the court house but they all redirect me to the jury clerk.
I feel like she gave me the wrong time. She said to call at 11:30 but that seems too late to me.
TELL HER HOW YOU FEEL
TELL HER HOW YOU FEEL
TELL HER HOW YOU FEEL
TELL HER HOW YOU FEEL
TELL HER HOW YOU FEEL
>>17174218
That's what I'm thinking as well, and I'm on the verge of doing it.
The only thing stopping me is that we work together and she's a step above me, not my manager but someone I rely on a lot for assistance.
Then again if kissing didn't make it worse, speaking shouldn't either, right?
>>17174237
That's why you ask he instead out on a proper date. Your reaction will tell ...
>>17174266
What if I just go "can we have a chat about what happened friday, I like you, would you like to go grab some coffee sometime etc"
"They didn't have enough money to continue the journey"
What tense is this? It sounds like present perfect but there is no past participle or -ing verb. It's driving me crazy.
>>17174049
>didn't have
It should be simple past.
>>17174049
Let's try another.
"OP did not understand tense, because he did not study his coursework."
>>17174055
Don't mverbs in simple past end in -ed?
Thanks so much.
So this might be a little long sorry, I just want to explain it all. There's this girl I work with who I had thought was cute and tried flirting with and what not. We didnt really click, but every time I talked to her she would mention her sister or say how me and her sister have stuff in common, so a part of me naturally felt like she was trying to get me to go for her sister (she also works with us). I've never met her so I looked her up on FB and everything her sister told me is true. We seem to have a lot in common and she is very cute. The problem is that I work full time in the butcher block, whereas she works maybe two days a week if she's lucky up front cashier. So i NEVER see her. So im planning on going up to the store in a couple days when she works and I have off, buy some groceries and go through her line to go introduce myself. I was just gonna say something like "hey I'm anon, iv heard a lot of great things about u" or something like that. But my question is what should I do next? Like I said I'll never see her, so would it be okay to ask her out on a date then? I mean itsnt that the point of dating, to get to know each other? People do that shit at bars right, see a stranger..."hey let me buy u a drink ". Or would I seem like a freak asking for a date first time I meet her. Please help
TL;DR can you ask a girl out on a date to get to know each other after first meeting her? If not, what's the correct way?
Pic not related of course
>>17174034
OP here. Forgot to mention that a friend of mine works with her up front and he's told me that he thinks I'd have a chance with her. She's apparently told him that she can tell I like her sister....which may be a problem considering I'm over her sister and trying to be with her
bump for interest
I would say go for it man. Ask her if she wants to grab a coffee or something, maybe mention that her sister said you have shit in common. Up to you.
If you don't feel entirely comfortable about it ask the sister what she thinks about it first, if she's cool with it. It's not uncommon to just ask someone out, and if you're confident about it she may well say sure. If you don't see her often then it's not the end of the world if she says no... this shit is generally awkward for like a week max then people forget about it.
I'm holding a graduation speech in High School in less than a week and I haven't even begun writing.
Help me it needs to be funny, entertaining and all that I've watched a bunch of YT videos and they've really helped me but it's not enough!
>>17174007
>I'm holding a graduation speech in High School
What does this even mean?
Please tell me you are not the valedictorian...
>>17174024
No I'm not just holding a speech
which part of OP was confusing?
>>17174024
Op make talky words in magic voice stick. Room clap hand when done.
So this thread is basically for talking about all the things you feel guilty doing and want to change. Either wallow in it or ask around for some advice on how to fix your life.
Currently me
>20
>Not doing too well at uni but not liking the course I'm doing
>Wanting to quit smoking but it's hard when you use it at a crutch
>Don't have many friends, the ones I have are all travelling very soon for long periods
>Always sleep in till past 11
>Can't seem to concentrate on my hobbies and passions
>Can never finish any books I read, always lose interest
>Haven't been to the gym in forever. I'm in fear of the hard work.
how do I stop staring at women?
>>17173992
was also smoking as a crutch, then I got really into chinese tea and brewing gong-fu, I really wanted to taste the subtleties in the tea and felt like smoking was stunning my palate, so I stopped, highly recommend it
>>17174003
If it's because you're getting caught or if you have a GF then stop doing to so obviously. Or just wear sunglasses.
How can you be "that" guy, that attracts almost anyone and everyone wants to know? What kind of hobbies/mindset to have? I just want to be the cool guy that everyone wants to hang around with and take pictures, go to events etc...
Be the kindest person you know. Cultivate empathy and understand others more.
After that, learn as much as possible, and have a future outlook for your life.
Then when you at the party, you will be the person everyone wants to talk to because 1. You are a literal saint and 2. You have vast stores of knowledge to have interesting conversations about.
>>17173999
Trips speak the truth? But I don't want to be seen as the Nice Guy everyone hates that, especially women. Also, I don't travel because I consider it a waste of money so that's a huge subject I can't connect with the majority of people
>How to be an interesting person?
Be interesting.
Protip: that you are asking this question and desperate to be that archetype means that you won't. Ever. Give it up. You aren't that person.
A women who lived in the same area as me died a few days ago, it was her funeral today and i never went. my family think it was disrespectful that i never turned up. I never spoke to her or her family. If one of my family member died, it would make no difference to me if someone who i never spoke to didnt turn up. obviously i think its sad but i dont think it would make a difference if i went. was it really disrespectful? thanks
WEll I can see where they are coming from when they tell you you should have gone.
>person dies you didnt know
>you had 1 last chance to see into their life and you chose not to.
When you say area what exactly do you mean? Is this some small-town hick thing? Because in cities you'll be going to funerals every day if you went whenever someone died in your area. If you never knew them, never interacted with them, what purpose would you serve at the funeral?
>>17173997
Why would or should he want to see into this person's life?
>>17174005
i live in a big city. she was a women that lived near me, i live in a working class area.
How do I show empathy to people?
How do I console people who've been through some shit, assuming I can't offer them a legit solution to the problem?
presence is more than enough most of the times
>>17173982
I don't get it when retards from /r9k/ post shit like this. Are you stupid? You can't LEARN empathy... you feel it or you don't.
just let them vent to you, and if they ask for your opinions give them. Don't be dismissive or judgemental or offer more than asked most of the time
