Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 625. page
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I made this new friend about 2 months ago. She's very flirty and touchy with my other two male friends, but she only acts like that about half the time with me. The other half of the time, she acts tense and nervous, and it makes me think that she gets uncomfortable around me or something. This feeling of tension has gotten very strong recently; at first she was touchy and flirty most of the time like with my two friends, but now it just feels tense more and more often.
Another thing I notice is that one of my friends, who I am almost positive likes her, tries to avoid talking about her when I'm around. He also subtly tries to exclude me from things that involve her if it's last minute, but the big thing is just how he talks about her around me vs. how he talks about her with everyone else.
I'm really not sure what to think here. Part of me thinks they are secretly fucking or something, and the other part of me thinks that it's me making her uncomfortable by some way I'm acting (which is always the same, so I dont know what changed...), I don't know man. I don't know what's happening.
Can anyone help me analyze this? I can give a lot more information if needed.
Sounds like they like each other and she thinks you fancy her so she's keeping her distance a bit while he's being standoffish to you because he's worried you have designs on her.
>>17203601
lots of reasons fellow fagget
1-your friend is fucking her in secret and he is protective and doesn't want her to be all touchy with other males
2-you are weird or make weird reaction when she is touchy obviously you cant see how weird you are
3- friend is jealous and doesn't want to talk about her in public coz she is his imaginary gf
4-man up and ask her why is she acting weird
Has his attitude towards you changed significantly in recent times?
Could be a conspiracy, but it is possible that he's been talking shit about you, to her; and he's trying to drive a wedge between you two, to eliminate his competition.
I'm getting a tattoo soon but I have no idea what to get. I think I want some sort of symbol. It needs to be pretty small, and not too detailed. Any ideas?
Pic unrelated
Get a design you want or else you might regret it later on
You should never decide on a design because you want a tattoo, you should only ever decide on a tattoo because you want a design. You get me?
>>17203575
Yeah I get you
>dreamt that I was conflictingly in love with two statues at the same time
>ended up having sex with one
>its body was made of bronze
>fell in love with that one
>had to keep my relationship a secret (and that they can remotely move and all)
>so basically: fell in love with a bronze statue
>weird dream; what could it possibly imply?
You were horny in your sleep and for some reason your brain brought up statues. It's not fucking magic.
It implies you are no longer close to a loved one. Is there a friend/family member/ex etc that you haven't associated with in awhile?
Could also mean your lack of energy has lead you to disappointment? have you been lazy or procrastinating lately?
>>17203565
Ahahhah, I'm not sure if it's as exact as I dreamt it.
>17203570
If the loved one is family, then why sex? And yes, I have been procrastinating.
But that's so damn weird. I find it so strange that sex was part of it.
I have problem with being too attached. How do I stop this? I'm tired of getting my hopes raised by someone who leaves, thus breaking me.
I wish I knew.
>>17203544
Don't meet new people I guess?
>>17203555
That works to some degree but causes other problems.
How do u become friends with someone who loves you?
I have this super amazing friend.
We have a strong emotional bond.
He is insanely funny and intellectually stimulating. Widens my views. Makes me grow as a person.
Known him for an year.
He tries to confess.
I know this guy. He is not some dick chasing girls. He is sincere.
I know I should cut him off for a while.
But is it worth it to lose a good friend?
Am I fucked up?
>>17203527
>But is it worth it to lose a good friend?
Your friend is gone. Trying to remain his friend is just going to make him resent the fact that you don't feel the same way about him that he does about you.
Then, sooner or later, you'll get a boyfriend or start seeing someone and little by little he'll get crushed everyday by the fact that you're with someone else and it'll be torture.
Its over. He took a chance in telling you how he felt and it permanently doomed your relationship. Sorry. Shit sucks but it happens.
Tell him that you don't feel the same way! Be very clear with that so he can move on, it's important that he doesn't have any hopes. Tell him that you still want to be friends, if he needs space he will tell you.
>>17203527
I've been on the opposite end of the stick, and can confirm that >>17203559 is true - the dynamics of the relationship you two have will never be the same. While I don't necessarily resent my particular person, I had to lessen contact as not doing so would've kept me from getting over it (it's been two years and it still kind of bugs me desu).
Just curious though, if he's this great and perfect guy and all, why wouldn't you give him a chance?
If you don't pay rent and none of your stuff is left in the renting house despite of some clothes and the contract expired and you refuse to move out, can somoone kick you out (naked)?
Wondering about this case:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1H5gc0JVNFM
>This guy was kicked out naked from his apartment, his roommate sits there and laughs at him while the naked one is trying to get in. He didn't pay his rent for months and was not interested in solving this problem. He was sure noone can just kick him out. So the owner terminated the contract. As it expired and he refused to move out, guy's stuff were send to the location he gave at the rent contract and he was dragged out from the house from his bed. Apperently, he sleeps naked. He is being filmed via video intercom. And funny part is none of his stuff remained in this apartment, so there is no reason to open the door for him. Technically, he doesn't live there anymore so he is an intruder and should be arrested.
>can you legally have a right to stay somewhere that doesn't belong to you and you're not providing any consideration for?
What a stupid question
That depends on the laws of the country you're in. In most places, just locking someone out of the house naked is probably not ok.
>>17203517
and what if he has no right to be there and he uses someone else's clothes and bed? Does that person have a right to say "give it back to me and get off my bed" and the owner has a right to say "leave my house" at the same time?
guess guy was a dick and had a bad luck
How can I get a girlfriend (or friend for that matter), if I can't appreciate modern society. The materialism and hedonistic tendencies of the people I interact with truly infuriates me. I'm going to be attending a university with a strong party culture, so I assume its only going to get worse. I'm not suicidal (yet), but sometimes its really hard to interact with people without resorting to materialistic small talk, which I despise.
Obviously the world is not perfect, but how should I deal with the consumerist mass culture of my surroundings?
I've contemplated isolating myself, but even then my condition will only get worse.
Drink until you blunt that edge of yours.
>>17203508
>Obviously the world is not perfect, but how should I deal with the consumerist mass culture of my surroundings?
The only reason you hate modern society is because you don't fit in, so you compensate for your sadness with anger and a superiority complex.
If you perceive modern society as beneath you then you don't have to face the reality that even in a hedonistic and morally bankrupt cultural climate you're not welcome.
Get off of your high horse and join the masses. You can sit in the corner and turn your nose up to life as it passes you by or you can jump into the fray and hope for the best.
You're not above behaving like an animal and having fun. We're all glorified monkeys in clothes so drop the superiority bullshit and do something empty and stupid and exhilarating. Soak it in, because this is all it is, kid.
>>17203545
No OP, don't do that, don't become one of them.
Find a couple of people, who don't like to party and hang out with them.
There are people who don't fit in in every college and you can stick together.
I've been dating this girl for 2 years now, and she's about to leave for a bigger city, which is like 7 hours from here by train. Even though my life is here at the moment, I'm considering moving there in 2-3 years. As of right now, we really love each other and I support her choice as it's the best for her carreer.
Obviously, we plan on having a long distance relationship but that's something neither of us did before.
How do I make it work? Is it even feasible? I really care about this relationship and am pretty scared.
Please do share your experiences in the matter.
Long distance relationships suck dick. I was in one for two years. The distance, inability to touch each other, frustrations etc. make it very difficult.
>>17203471
But it makes cheating easier.
>>17203471
This guy is totally right. Take it from a guy who survived and came out rosy (we are still together even now) the distance is like daily kick in the boys.
You have to be more than committed (like willing to marry her level of commitment) and she has to feel the same way, and you have to put in constant work. It isn't easy.
If you think you can handle it I could give you survival tips.
Can people with no doctor education give good health advice to relatives?
I am interested in medicine, but I don't want to be a doctor. Can I study biology, read books on illnesses and tell better than a shit therapist?
(In my country you can get Fs in med school and still work)
Doctors forget what they learn. They are good because they have experience with patients every day.
>>17203442
>Can people with no doctor education give good health advice to relatives?
Definitely not.
>>17203449
I understand I won't have experience and be nowhere to real doctor.
It's just that i live in shit small town, where you can buy doctor's degree for hilarious money.
Like retarded people, who got Fs in a shit uni on literally all subjects and know nothing.
They get kicked out of jobs where people can die, so they're mostly therapists or dermatologists. Most good doctors move to central cities and so we get health-dangerous doctors, who simply move from clinic to clinic. They get sued, pay and it gets forgotten.
Curing illnesses is all about experiences, yes, knowing what is the most common ones in the area, so it can be a routine. I don't want a routine life with people, I think I'll get into theoretical side of medicine. So will it be any help? Literally any.
Or should I get pharmacy as a second degree.
/adv/ I'm so fucking mad right now.
My ex has had just an abortion. When I confronted her about it she said she's not ready for a kid, she doesn't want to have one with me and she didn't want to suffer through a pregnancy she didn't want. Then she dumped me. When I told this to my mother she said she already knew because she's the one who advised my ex to get an abortion! She told her I'm a useless asshole neet with no future that's unbearable to be around and that she should think of her own life and future and not commit the same mistakes my mother did. She told me she regrets having me and that I've been nothing but a burden and a pain to her and if I had died she would have been happy. She also told me to pack my stuff because she wants to throw me out. I have no job and no friends or skills I don't want to be a wageslave and I don't want to be homeless I can't survive on my own I'm only 20 what the fuck fo I do? What the fuck is wrong with my mother to want talk like that about me to other women and kill me, her baby like that? So what if I'm neet I'm still her baby she should be on MY side damnit.
>>17203423
An hero pls
Get a job you useless cunt
I'm sorry for you, anon, you must have had a harsh childhood.
That is so not okay, but you don't choose your parents.
>>17203427
Seconded. You fucking delusional if you want a kid at 20, when you don't even have a job to support yourself. Get good.
Hey /adv/,
I'm a 25yo male. My parents are going to have a divorce, beause my mum was caught cheating. They have been married for 29 years.
Has anyone else gone through this? Who's side did you take? Did you even take sides?
Please talk to me.
Thank you.
If your father is not a complete douche, take his side. Your mum failed miserably as a wife, she has to take responsibility for her actions.
>>17203444
This.
Your dad didn't cheat, take his side.
Take your dad's side obviously. It's going to be harder on him than your slut mom
Can anyone explain the various possibilities of nudes getting leaked from one's device.
And any advice on how to prevent it?
Put the nudes inside a file that can only be opened with a password (Like a .rar file), and put it onto a USB. Then lock the USB with a password. Only use that USB for nudes.
The only 100% sure way to prevent nude leaks is to not take nudes in the first place.
>>17203389
Well. Your logic is sound, but similarly one shouldn't carry cash while going out in the chances of getting robbed or pickpocketed. This is the 21st century where almost /everything/ is digitalized. Get over it.
Ok the situation I am.currently in.is
Im living with my friend whos a girl and has 4 kids. We are very close but idk if she is even remotely interested in having a sexual relationship. The.way were living I might as well be her boyfriend. I take care of her kids all.day
and clean. We sit close when we smoke cigarettes or weed. She doesn't seem to mind when I nudge my arm on hers.
A little more info.
I took care of her kids for half a year when she was down and out. I didn't even know her she was my friend girlfriend.
Anyway shes asked for months to come live with her. Shes inna lawsuit which the company she filed against is settling out of court for 10 mil.
She says she just wants to help me cuz I helped her when she needed it.
Ive always given even when ive had nothing all my life. You first me second. I will be a stepping stone for your greatness. She says well now its my turn to be lifted up.
And I am much too beta to.even try to come on to her. Or even bring up such a topic. She openly told me shes on her period. What do brothers. Ive been her 5 years and cant count the number of threads ive ever posted in.
Please advise me
Tldr; how to shag my roommate or know if she wants to at all.
P.s. I am.beta if u couldn't tell.
A little extra info I am 6'5 in height and weight between 220-230.
I am a very peaceful person.
I am respectful and wellmannered.
I connect with people of all sides of the stereotype. I am friends with people who run concerts and party on yachts and friends with black gangsters who wouldn't hesitate to.put a bullet thru someone. Ive always been liked by everyone even tho I dropped out of highschool and have no job.
Im told by everyone around me theyre amazed or fascinated by how my mind works and the complex thoughts I deal with daily.
I just want someone who.wants to be with me thru thick and thin.
Pic related.
Ask her if she would like to start a sexual relationship.
Since I have nothing better to do.
I dont remember much of my childhood. Most of what I remember are traumatic events, being locked outside sitting in a tree cuz my stepdad set the dog on me (I was 6), being beat all over my body with a belt by my mother, my moms friend threatening to cut my toes off, find my mom dead in her bed from a infection from sharing meth needles (I was 8).
I dont know why I did but I had decided to.jump on her thinking she might come back to life. She did. And was taken to the hospital.
I took care of my 2 sister (I was 8, lamey was 4 tiffany was 3)
Who I had taken care of in the last few months b4 my mom died. Feeding them peanut butter cux that's all we had. I went hungry so they could eat.
We ended up at my grandmas.
My grandma wasn't able to handle us as we were unruly kids. I.ended up in the system and went to a grouphome facility where I stayed there for 7 years.
When it comes to the friend-zone, I have developed the habit that when it becomes increasingly clear she is not interested in me the same way, but my feelings won't negate themselves otherwise... I sit down with her candidly, honestly, and demonstrate that I feel quite a bit for her, and that because those feelings aren't being reciprocated, I'm not always going to be available and this friendship simply isn't going to work out because of it. And that since I'm not getting what I want with her, and it's painfully obvious I'm not currently capable of seeing her as anything less than a crush, there really isn't a reason for me to stay; and I'm going to need to break away for my own health.
So why is it that for the last four times in a row I've done this, I ended up dating said girl sooner or later? I got my last four girlfriends (including the one I'm seeing now) but pulling this off. I don't get with them immediately, but after a period of time that feels natural for a friendship to progress to a relationship. I'm really having trouble articulating what's going on inside their head when I become upfront and honest with my intentions, and when I suggest I'm going to leave if they remain unsatisfied. The last four times, they were genuine and sincere, but I still feel like this could be a really easy way to manipulate people. And like you're that asshole /r9k/ bitches about.
Basic economics. If you're resource that's constantly and readily available, people aren't going to go out of their to obtain and you. If you're more scarce, you're more in demand, and buyers would put more effort into getting their hands on you.
Women are notorious for wanting what they can't have.
It *is* manipulative. All you're doing is threatening to throw them out for not wanting your dick. There's nothing worse than having a guy friend, especially one you care about, suddenly cut you out of their life without giving a chance. Of course those girls are ggoing to take things further than they want to. You're not giving them much of a choice. They don't want to lose a valuable friend. So they're agreeing to be serious with you because you've forced them into that position.
>>17203321
>When it comes to the friend-zone, I have developed the habit
You should not be getting friendzoned so often that you have any associated habits.
This is a somewhat long story that took course over four months, but I'll try to sum up the main points.
>18, senior year of high school
>girl I've had in some classes, but hardly talked to, starts talking to me a lot, goes out of her way to run into me
>graduation day, she takes a picture of us together and sends it to me, she gave me her number
>after the ceremony, she ran over and hugged me really tightly and told me she wished she could see me more
>I asked my friends for advice and they said "she wants the D", and then I asked my older sister who said she was definitely interested, and probably hurt that I hadn't made a move yet
>I decided she'd be a pretty sweet first GF, and that she probably would stop talking to me if I didn't initaite contact at least this time, and decided to ask her out the next day
>I called her and explained that I did like her (I'm a pretty closed book and figured she might not know), and then asked her out. She replied
"... Anon, I think you're a really nice guy, and you shouldn't get in a relationship with me, I'm not a good person, but we should still be friends"
And then my autism took grip and I just said okay, I'll see you around and hung up. I was quite shocked she turned me down, and I'm still not sure if she was trying to say no nicely, or actually felt like she couldn't have a relationship.
Now I feel bad about putting her in a tough situation, and possibly making her think I just wanted to go out with her. I would be completely comfortable with a platonic friendship. Should I call her again and try to explain this? Or should I wait for her to initiate contact again (although I've got a feeling she might not now), as she always has before? If she does talk to me, should I even try to justify asking her out, or just try to ignore that it ever happened?
>>17203284
Text book emotional manipulator. Only continue to be her friend if you understand that she will most likely try and play games with you. DO NOT DATE... EVER!!!
>>17203299
I've really not gotten that feeling from her before. I also don't think I'm a likely target for that because people usually describe me as emotionless.
>>17203284
If someone tells you that they're not a good person or that they aren't worth dating, or any bullshit like that, you should believe them.
She knows herself better than you do and she knows if she acts like a completely shitty person. Someone who recognizes that they act poorly and yet still elect to be like that is someone you really want to avoid.
Yes, it's possible that she just has really low self-esteem. It's still a good idea to not get involved with someone like that as this is just going to cause problems and make any potential relationship much more difficult than it needs to be.
Sure, be her friend if you can avoid catching feelings for a girl that you spend time with. Otherwise you should avoid her like the plague.
