Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 57. page
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I am sure my dad is going to kill me soon (literally murder me.) Do I call the police now or call 911 when he tries it?
I dont have any friends or anyone I know here.
More information required.
>>17357042
He created you so he can destroy you
>>17357045
Alright, let me explain.
My dad is a very violent person. He is a woman beater as well, and would hit my mother to the point of bleeding all during my childhood. My mother never called the police because 'she didnt want her kids to grow up without a father'. She was a stupid woman.
Later then I moved far away from those assholes, but they wanted me to visit for 2 days. So I did, and I took a plane to where I am now. They told me they had changed, that they had some gifts for me and that they miss their kid. They were crying on the phone so I came.
However, my dad thought I was moving here. He said I had to, whether I liked it or not. When I said no he went phsyco and tried swerving the fucking car into a goddamn wall trying to kill us all.
I am sure that he is not afraid to murder me.
But I think he's gonna actually do it. I heard him break his TV. The room I'm staying in doesnt have a lock. None of the doors, in fact.
I'm a weak shit, and my flight isnt until tommorow.
Sometimes I completely disconnect my mind from the world and it feels like i'm watching a movie or playing a video game when i'm just working like normal.
Does this happen to other people?
It happens to me at least, that's for sure. It happens quite often now.
its called derealization, its a mild symptom of mental illness. its happened to me when i used to smoke a lot of weed and i became psychotic. just keep it mind that everything is real and you are still very much mortal. dont do drugs when your in this state unless youre in a safe place and you know you can firmly "ground" yourself
>some people think of it as a gift, because it can be an incredibly ethereal beautiful experience
It's not a mental illness. It's normal to just "shut off" during work. It's a good thing. The people who overreact emotionally at work are the ones incapable of doing this and cant keep a fucking job.
I had a conversation with my boss about potentially having PTSD. I was encouraged by my workplace to pursue psychiatric care, and when I did the doctors told me I should be considering PTSD. She told upper management and I was almost fired on the spot.
Is this a normal reaction? I think it's relevant to mention I'm a woman who has never worked in the military.
Its a scary word, where PTSD=potential law suit. Some people with PTSD legit snap if triggered somehow. Keep it privately with doctors only, tell everyone else its just anxiety or therapy
If they had fired you, you could have sued for big bucks for discrimination.
need cash dude. i like that route tho, panic attacks to hide ptsd. of course there is benzos
Do counselors ever "side" with the child rather than parents?
I'm 24, in college, have had jobs before but on break now. I still live with my parents because houses are expensive. They weren't raised on American culture and the values it entails, so our house sees a lot of differences. Throughout the years I've gotten really tired of explaining my side, since I grew up with American culture and the differences are just too strong.
When I'm with my friends, we like to smoke weed. That became a problem to my controlling parents. They're ok with booze, however, since that's what they grew up on. But weed is the devil's drug, to them it's exactly the same as heroin and other hard stuff. There's no changing their mind on it either, they are quite conservative and old. My straight A's and Dean's List status are invisible to them too.
We're setting up a counselor meeting to help solve my "problem". I've never been to one before and don't know it works. My desired outcome is: I want to keep smoking weed until it is time to quit. Once I'm 1 or 2 months away from graduating, then I'll fully stop so to pass a drug test before getting a real career.
How can I convey this to the counselor so they'll side with me and help me put some sense in my parents' heads? I know the working world will be a real shithole after graduation and I just want to lengthen the good times as long as possible.
You could present the facts in front of the counselor about how non dangerous weed is, especially when compared to alcohol. Your parents likely won't give a shit but it might help the counselor take your side.
you're 24 who cares what they think
>>17357009
If you don't like their rules, move out. I usually go back to my parents house for a few weeks to save money during the summer when I don't get much business and while we never argue it does mean I don't get to do things they don't approve of, like staying in bed after 10am and going out drinking more than once a week.
how do i get out of this guilty feeling?
>be really horny
>send nudes to my boyfriends best friend
>he is better looking than my boyfriend
>i say sorry and tell him that it was a mistake
>hope that he masturbates to my picture later
how do i get OUT of this situation? i was MANIC and losing my mind at that moment :3.. No trolls please ;)
Kill yourself.
Whore
>>17356998
call him and beg him not to tell your boyfriend. Offer a blowjob if he keeps his lips shut, you'll keep yours open for him.
So..
What is the alternative to fucking killing myself?
Masturbation passes the time.
Just plain killing yourself without the fucking, cause I'm pretty sure you're not doing a whole lot of that
But for real, go on a trip somewhere. Completely change your way of living and do something out of your comfort zone
dealing with the consequences of your actions
Hi /adv/,
I have never been too good with social interaction, though I have managed to snag a few friends in my life. I have recently decided to make a conscious effort to be more social and to create bonds with more individuals. As I understand it the first step in any relationship is successful small talk, which I am abysmal at.
What are some topics that I should read up on and practice articulating that will hold the interest of normies? I don't want to end up like Chris-chan
>>17356977
first and foremost, stop treating this like a science experiment. you cannot clinically orechestrate bonds. thats just called manipulation. the hwole point is you want to feel things. so stop trying to force a scenario.
that being said, its small talk. if ur so smart to approach this clinically, than you already know what to talk about and are just being an edgy try hard faggot. talk to people about whatever you want.
general topics (That you dont need to fucking research) inclue
>wahts up?
>hows your day going?
>do anything fun lately?
>where you headed
>waht you doing here?
>interesting weather yeah?
>have you heard about XX on the news?
>>what about YY local event?
stop focusing on trying to fit in with normies and just focus on finding people who fit in with you
>>17356995
It's not about manipulating vast amounts people into liking me. I just literally hVe no idea what to say after "Hi. How are you? My name is Anon" Of course after we are aquainted we will find interests we share and can discuss, but I can't even get to that point due to not knowing what it is strangers are supposed to say to eachother.
>>17357054
literally anything. there is no list. there is no science. its just people saying those stupid things, bringing up stuff tehy actually care about, and then hoping theres common interest.
skip the retardation and go striaght to real interests.
Where to find girlfriend?
In my job there are only men
All my friends emigrated, lost contact
Then how?
Bookstores are a great place man
>>17356976
Try online
>>17357079
>Bookstores
But I had never read a single book in my life
For the femanons
I'm 21, I'll be losing my hair over then next week cause cancer, and I'm wondering if you look at hairless individuals differently.
Moreover, is it even morally right to involve myself with more girls when I have a possibly terminal illness??
>>17356958
Pity fucks. You make them feel like a good person and you get sexy times to end off on. Not too bad.
>>17357027
Not OP but I've been told that there's no such thing as a pity fuck.
>>17357035
Not OP either, but you've been lied to.
Alright /adv/ I have severe cabin fever and need help.
So I just graduated, whoop dee doo. So naturally the job search starts. Well someone I know offered me a position at a good company so i said great sign me up! Now it's been a mknth and I'm still waiting. It's still reliable since over the past few months the compang has been bought out and restructured so they're reorganizing everything. They aren't officially hiring, but my connection found someone interested in me so all that's left is interviews and that sort of thing.
Anyways, I'm bored to high hell. I live in So Cal and have no money (since I don't have a job) so going out is out of the question. It's hot as hell and I have a normal sleeping schedule so walks are enjoyable until the heat and pollution sets in.
I think I'm just anxious to start since I hate being a neet, even if it's momentarily, so what are some ways to be more patient?
Video games and anime are out.
>>17356943
Contemplate on the extreme vastness of space and time and your utter insignificance. That should do the trick
>>17357006
C'mon man, I'm not 12 anymore. Although you might be onto something. I do like reading and Astronomy. Maybe.
Wikipedia has ruined me.
>>17357013
Gaze into the abyss, it's never to late.
Can you be a cool loner?
How do you do so?
>>17356927
depends on your definition of 'cool'
>>17356927
only if you or someone thinks it's "cool"
>>17356936
You can be a cool person with the facade of a loner but you can't be a cool loner.
Do people other than me exist?
Am I a person?
Am I a person in the same way they are?
>>17356924
I get you but there's no way to say that without coming off as a prententious douchebag.
But I get you. It's like there's this gap between me and other people that doesn't exist for everyone else.
>>17356924
>Do people other than me exist?
Yes
>Am I a person?
Yes
>Am I a person in the same way they are?
No, you live in "different" worlds as how you perceive it differently than somebody else.
Everyone lives in their own "world" and communicates to other people's worlds that seem simular, but never really are. Some people's worlds are more distant from other worlds, which becomes clear if you try to communicate with someone that has severe autism (not the meme assburger autism that might be somewhat true, but I believe that assburger is something that has more to do with a kid's upbringing --> never learned to socialize properly, and it's getting worse because of new technology).
>>17356938
philosophy of this nature has been turned into something that is viewed as being pretentious or pseudo-intellectual.
Hell, philosophy in general has had shit smeared on it in the past decades. No one likes the philosopher anymore, and for anyone to consider themselves one only serves to set them apart from everyone else.
which beds are best? how do i do research on this i have no clue.
i'm thinking queen size because it's just me. is $1k usd enough?
>>17356907
beds are mostly a preference more than an actual 'what is best' thing. thoguh some are clearly better than others.
if you can, try one of the new purple matresses. its 1000 bucks for a queen size last i checked. you can try it for a hundred days and get your money back.
DONT BE AFRAID TO GET YOUR MONEY BACK. most people just buy and dont fucking bother changing it when they dont find it comfortable.
>>17356922
purple?
>>17356933
youtube search for purple mattress
I'll greentext to make it shorter:
>met a girl one year ago, let's call her A
>I notice some vibes from her like staring at me often and smiling, touching my arm when we are close, laughing at my jokes
>realize she's really cool and really good looking
>suddenly one day she starts being cold with me, avoids eye contact, acts weird when we talk, refuses to dance with me at some parties
>I feel bad for not having made a move or something before
>I notice she likes some guy who's a mutual friend, let's call him B
>another mutual friend sort of confirms this when he starts teasing her constantly about liking B
>B gets a girlfriend and stops hanging out with us for about 2 months
>A starts becoming friendly with me again, but in a more friendish way not a romantic way
>maybe it's because my dad and A really get along in some charity group they are part of (I can't join it because of college)
>meanwhile I try my luck asking out a friend of A but she's not interested in me
>and I'm still interested in A
>suddenly B breaks up with his girlfriend and advertises how single he is
So where do I stand now? Is it too late to make a move? Or should I rush to ask her out soon just in case she gets into something with B? Besides if I ask her out and get rejected it will be a bit weird considering I've also asked her friend out before like I mentioned.
Anyway, thanks.
Iktf. Long story short: ask her out. You are only playing games mainly with yourself like this.
>>17356970
Thanks
>>17357151
It's another thing to actually do it. I'm in a somewhat same situation right now.. I did ask her in person last weekend but our conversation got interupted and I didn't continue it afterwards ffs.
She is really "cover-up-shy" /timid/reserved. It's really fucking with my head because I can't read her.
A fellow anon wanted to know more about this in a hobbies thread, but I wasn't able to get to it in time to respond. Making an ama thread in hopes he and others might catch it.
I spend the bulk of my free time doing barbershop quartet singing. I compete and do gigs with a quartet and travel to several conventions each year. It can be a time consuming and expensive hobby, but it's a pretty fulfilling one I'd say.
So yeah, feel free to ask me anything about the barbershop world or just singing in general. Pic related, though its seldom what a quartet looks like nowadays.
>>17356836
Are you a barber?
I have no info on this stuff besides comedy tv series.
What's the requirement? What's do you even do?
>>17356836
Hey homie, that was me that was in that hobbies thread. How do I get started? I haven't sung since elementary school. Do I just find a local chorus and tag a long? There is a men's chorus near me should I start there?
>>17356859
I am not a barber, though people often ask if I cut hair when I tell them I do barbershop. There really aren't any requirements. The vast majority of barbershoppers are amateur singers, so you don't have to be a music wiz to do it. As for what I do, I sing with a chorus every Thursday night and rehearse with my quartet on Sunday evenings. I can go into more detail for both of those things more if you'd like.
>>17356862
Joining a chorus is pretty much how everyone starts out. There are many barbershop choruses or "chapters" throughout the United States and Canada. You can find one by using this link (http://ebiz.barbershop.org/ebusiness/Public/ChapterProximitySearch2.aspx) or simply google "barbershop chorus in X".
Chapters are mostly all associated with the Barbershop Harmony Society of which I'm a member. You don't have to join the society to participate, but you do if you want to sing in a competition and get other member benefits along the way.
Be warned that not all choruses are created equal. There are some large choruses with a wide age range among its members as well as smaller choruses which are made up exclusively of old timers. I've sung with both and don't find the older, smaller choruses as appealing. At any rate, just go to a chapter meeting, introduce yourself, and go from there. Barbershoppers are a pretty friendly and welcoming bunch.
