Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 28. page
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If I keep self improving, keep assimilating into society, keep joining clubs and rushing fraternities, putting myself out there and being sociable and living a relatively normal life, then eventually I'll get laid right?
This can't be my life forever.
Eventually I just wont be able to do it anymore.
>>17363168
Stop being so desperate. Focus on other shit and it'll all fall into place. When you have your systems set up where you're a functioning human being with things going on for you, you'll start to look attractive.
>>17363168
being laid is a subplot of life, not the endgame.
>>17363217
>it'll all fall into place meme
now i'm awaiting a "beeeeeee urself" post
TL:DR I was "homeschooled" but not really. Sat at home playing video games/browsing the internet all day. Took an ASVAB practice test online. How's my score, and what should I do to get myself in to the US Navy with a good job?
Backstory: My parents decided to homeschool me in a state which has very lax homeschool laws. My math skills are basically non-existent beyond basic addition/subtraction, I think my parents stopped teaching me anything beyond 2nd-3rd grade level math because I threw tantrums whenever they tried to teach me. When I was awake, I spent my time on video games/the internet/tv shows/movies (from ~7 years old to 18). Although I did go to a gym so I can get into the Navy physical wise, and I read books/internet articles which interest me so I'm not retarded.
So, I'm 18 now. I'm still living in my parents house. I want to get a GED and join the Navy. My practice ASVAB scores are pic related (saved the amount of answers I got correct in notepad in percentages)
Here's the site where I took the test.
https://www.4tests.com/asvab
What should I be doing if I want to actually join the Navy without becoming a cook/janitor?
>>17362558
If this were a highschool asvab. They would fucking call your ass. 67.5 is a high score. I don't know about a GED however. But you qualify for a lot of good jobs. You won't be a cook.
>>17362558
Without a HS diploma it's very unlikely that you can join. They let in only an extremely small percentage of people that apply with a GED.
>>17362558
Whaever they promise you, whatever guarantee they give you, once you sign you belong to them and they can do what they want with you.
>be with gf for over 2 years
>she is quite manipulative and controlling and tries to make things go her way
>last 3 weeks shes been distant and sneaky
>lately shes been acting like she dosent care
>shes also been lying about what shes been doing
>she has been getting sort of close to a guy that lives in a dorm at college
>the other night I messaged her asking wtf is going on
>dosen't reply, I ring her a couple times and she dosen't answer
>find out she was lying off a friend and that she was at the uni (presuming seeing that guy)
>she rings me and tells me she was studying
i know that shes been lying, Ive asked her why she hasn't broken up with me yet and she dosen't give me and answer then laughs and walks off saying "let me sort my shit out", WTF is this shit? I did tell her to never contact me again after this btw
Wow man, that's really shitty. If you've been together for 2 years you deserved better than that
Some people are shitty, and you just cant fix that. Find comfort in knowing you did the right thing, and there was nothing you could do
Good luck
She's a slut and she knows it. Just don't mind her and start dating another girl when you feel ready. She'll be mad when she realize you don't care about her anymore while she will keep cheating on whoever she date like a whore.
You did good son, now just cut all contact and enjoy life without a manipulative slut.
Lets Discuss Our experiences. Serious or funny. Nasty or Delightful.
I am curious.
We all gotta remember the first time. Lets Share.
Age?-
Setting?-
Outcome?-
>>17361162
four years old. brother asked if i wanted to learn about sex. i said sure. he then told me we'd have it and i had to be the girl. i said no. he said if i didnt do it he'd tell on me and say it was me who suggested it.
made me rub his but and then his penis a little bit.
>>17361170
That doesn't sound too good
>>17361162
Around 6-7. Attic with cousin's friend, pretty sure its why I have social issues. Good news is most of it is still blocked out of my memory.
I'm worried I may be gay. I'm currently in a hetero relationship, but I think about women. I really like my man, he is the love of my life but I still feel this way. I don't know what to do. I don't think I can see myself spending the rest of my life with a woman, but I'm worried I'm gay. Should I ignore these feelings? Will they go away?
Ask him if he'd be down to have a threesome.
He wouldn't.
>>17361117
Wtf. Most men would jump with joy like a kid on christmas to have a gf who'd be down to fuck another girl with him.
Anyways, you should prob break up with him and go eat the carpet so you aren't a cheater.
GUIDELINES:
Before you post a question, check here to see if it's already been answered.
Keep questions short for more answers.
If you're not going to like honest answers, don't ask your question.
And please no derailing arguments.
FAQ:
>Do girls/guys like <insert specific look>?
>Is my body part big/small enough?
>Am I short/tall enough?
>Would you date a virgin?
><random insecurity>
Some do, some don't. Preferences differ, but complexes are always a turn-off.
>I'm shy and afraid of people/rejection. What do I do?
Get over it by practicing and exposing yourself to it, little by little, step by step. There is no single magical moment that will instantly change you forever. It takes hard work, time, and effort.
>I like someone. What do I do?
>How can I tell if someone likes me?
Ask them out.
>Where do I meet girls/guys?
Anywhere outside. Or online.
>Someone did something insignificant. What does it mean?
Nothing significant.
>XYZ happened. Interpret this for me please
We're not in their head, we don't fucking know.
>This person did something that hurt my feelings. Why do guys/girls do this?
Because shit people are shit people. It's not a gendered thing.
>Someone has made it super clear they're no longer interested in me. Do I still have a chance?
No.
>Where do I go on a first (or subsequent) date?
Pick one or more of the following: coffee, lunch, dinner, drinks, ice cream, movies, zoo, aquarium, museum, art gallery, <activity in your city>.
>Brandon, that guy who keeps asking about cuddling in platonic friendships and fart guy
Fuck off.
Guys:
How much do you care if a girl is a virgin? I'm scared that I'm going to end up too nervous and starfishing for my first time
>>17360964
Im always scared of blood because my penis is on the bigger side. I would just close my eyes and ask if im hurting her.
>>17360964
>How much do you care if a girl is a virgin? I'm scared that I'm going to end up too nervous and starfishing for my first time
Uhh...
Do I seek it out? No.
Would I be pissed a girl was? No.
I'd just be kind of...neutral. Wouldn't really care one way or the other.
I guess the only thing that'd change is i'd try to be more gentle and considerate than usual.
If you want some tips for your first time:
Be vocal and communicative (don't be afraid to give and take directions)
Relax
Have fun and try to laugh (it's hard to be nervous when you're laughing)
Look in to his eyes (it creates a greater sense of intimacy and is kind of hot as fuck)
>>17350598
Old one is dead
I'm a fucking psycho. I am thinking of this Charlie thing so much. I know I get attached after I have sex with someone but since we were getting along so well and how sweet and my type he was I thought it was okay. I can't really deal with not being able to really talk to him though... It is just stressing me out too much. I will call at like 6 if he hasn't messaged me back yet and I will ask about hanging out tomorrow but I really want to ask him if he hardly even likes talking to me. I don't care much if it seems clingy or anything anymore because it -is- clingy. It is how I feel and I need more attention than this from someone I am seeing.
It doesn't seem right to me and I don't like this very much and the whole thing is making me more sad than happy
I know he isn't thinking about this even nearly as much, he probably will be like "Jeez, what's up with how clingy this chick is" But it's just how I am. I need more communication than this, I need to feel like he is at least a little interested and I'm not feeling that way. I feel like I'm chasing him and I don't really like it.
Other ones still going
some of my friends got pretty famous and now they don't speak to me. I ran into one of them and he faked being friendly so he could sit at my table but didn't really act interested in my life, and didn't reply to a casual text. I guess I am taking it too personally but it still feels bad.
I don't know what to do.
>>17364475
Better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all
>...she's scared she wouldn't be able to separate the emotional from the physical...
You're friendzoned, bro. Time to forget about her. (At least, forget about her being your girlfriend.)
Quotes and defeatism. Thanks /adv/
so I just went to launch with a manager girl at my work so I can ace a interview for her old job, but when I showed up she dressed nice and had makeup on (she never wares the stuff) and we talked for a hour and a half about work a little and the rest about junk,and she was very into the convo...... did I just go on a date with out knowing it?
>>17364447
what makes you think that? I mean it could be professional but she has never done this with anyone from work before, it made me confused
Is the job that you're interviewing for within the same company?
There's an EDM dance club in my town that plays sick underground techno. I love this music with a passion. The only problem is this club is a gay club, but many straight people go for the music unless it's a gays-only night.
I've been there a couple of times with friends but I'm debating on going tonight by myself(everyone is busy). I'm no homophobe or anything, but I'm a fit tall attractive male. Gays hit on me enough in public or a mainstream bar, and are usually very forward. I don't want to get my ass grabbed or anything, and I fee like going to a place like this would legitimately be "asking for it".
What should I do?
>>17364428
*going to a place like this alone
Avoid gay clubs. You don't know when Mohamed goes out to make Allah happy
>>17364448
Well where should I get my techno fix?
I'm starting college soon and I need something that's better than my standard bike which I use for work. An ebike is MUCH cheaper, way more fun, and does the 20 mile round trip fine before needing a charge. Yeah a car has practically infinite range, but seems overkill for my needs save for a few road trips here and there. I'm leaning toward the ebike for long term benefits like saving money and health, but is a car really worth the extra money just for passengers and cargo?
They have winter where you live?
>>17364386
Yup. I would ride in the snow for months. I don't think and ebike is any different
I don't know what to shlick to anymore. I'm so tired of my usual stuff and of seeing and hearing about sex in general. The problem is I absolutely need to do it to relax and to fall asleep. I refuse to try getting into disgusting things because it's just wrong. What should I do? It's getting increasingly hard and stressful for me. Falling asleep in itself is also getting increasingly hard. It's so depressing.
>I refuse to try getting into disgusting things because it's just wrong.
No it's not
> I refuse to try getting into disgusting things because it's just wrong.
Is masturbating and sex really not disgusting enough already that you have to look down at even the implication of a fetish? You need to get over yourself.
Go get a vibrator or dildo or some other toy. Maybe a Hitachi wand. That or try some sleep aids, like melatonin. Oh, and maybe talk to your doctor about the stress and trouble sleeping.
Sounds like you need to take a break. Wait until the weekend (or whenever you can afford to lose some sleep) and then just quit cold turkey for a few weeks at least.
You'll probably find that your usual stuff (or even nothing but your imagination) will get you off just fine after that. Maybe don't it it so hard from there on out...
Should I accept a job offer if I am leaving the area in 3 weeks?
Why?
>>17364255
I would accept it for money and something to occupy my time.
I'm debating on accepting it because it feels douchey to be trained and then almost immediately leave the area, it also could potentially burn a bridge later on if it is douchy as I know a couple people that work there.
You'll look uncommitted to future employers if you have a job that you quit almost immediately. If you don't need the cash look up jobs in the area your moving to or treat this as a 3 week break.
Help me /adv/. I am sick and tired of my daily lifestyle of getting up, work, and going back to sleep. I am working towards various skills and goals and trying to get myself into college, but my lack of competence with these skills only makes me feel endlessly frustrated.
I've been seeing help for about 5 years now, and no-one I've seen so far has been helpful, and/or attempts to stifle my emotions by invalidating me. I have fully subscribed to all of their treatments, yet none of them work.
Meds only make me feel dull and lifeless, paranoid, and sometimes suicidal.
I am very anxious among people, and on top of that I have misophonia. I also have high-functioning autism.
I can't drive.
I need an immediate solution for this. I do not care if it's positive, i'm not looking for an instant fix-all. All I need is something to change the current state i'm in (without incriminating or hurting myself that is). I simply cannot bear the current rate i'm going at.
I was once in a very deep depression , and the one thing that got me out of it was finding a hobby. My particular hobby was music. I found a bass for cheap and I downloaded pdfs of music theory books from the internet and I made a point out of learning something.
After that I seemed to blossom in terms of hobbies and I had something to look forward to at the end of the day. It took a lot of patience and will to start the hobbies, but it really did pay out in the end.
After that it was fairly straightforward to find people who shared hobbies with me, now that I had some. Not only that, I had GAD and it turned out that it was cured via me calming down and setting time aside for my new hobbies. Before hand, I would struggle to be attentive to one thing before I would dive into being an anxious mess.
Hopefully this gives you a bit of advice.
>>17364268
Thank you. I am into drawing, playing the piano, and writing. These things used to usually calm me down, but i'm at the age and time where you need to start looking at your skill level for higher education.
Ever since, I have ceased to grow at a positive rate. All I do nowadays is frustrate myself over how inconsistent my gains have been in these art forms. Sometime I could be doing just fine, attempt a sketch, and manage to throw myself into a depression that lasts the rest of the night.
It's funny to look at my art from middle school/freshman year. Back then I lacked technique and drawings took hours to complete, but the end result looked alot better than what I have now. My theory is that because I was in a better space mentally.
>>17364284
>fustrate myself over how inconsistent my gains have been
I know that feeling. It's important to take a step back and look how you can improve. As with everything in life, taking a step back and observing it from a non-emotional point of view is a great tool for moving forward.
For art, I might suggest some of the Loomis books if you are at that beginner-moderate skill level. If you are better than that or just need some critique, visit /ic/ and post in one of the beginner threads and keep an open mind (along with realizing some people will say your art sucks because people on 4chan just behave that way sometimes). Improve from there. Heck, if you wanted to you can post some of your art here and I can give you some suggestions!
For music, since you are into piano I am guessing you are probably more skilled than most people. If this is true, then it is all about honing your skills further. Take a look into composing and the likes, maybe look for bands, plays, or concerts that need pianists.
For writing I do not have much of a suggestion for it since I myself am not good at it. It also is one of those hobbies that you can have a gift in and never know. So maybe if you have something finished up, you could always take a stab at getting it published if you think it might be worth it.
As for higher education, what is it that you were thinking of taking in college? I get the frustration aspect of it all entirely. But again, sometimes it just takes us coming back at it again and again and again before we finally break down some obstacle. Then we progress. It's tough and a lot of people give up which only reinforces the terrible idea further that if you don't do it at once, you'll never do it at all. But you ought to keep at it.
So, I normally stay away from dating, but I bumped into this girl at the park playing Pokemon GO. And we started talking a lot, ended up hangout out until 3am. Next day I ask her on a date. As we're talking she mentions how she only goes to a coffee shop becuase of the cute barista, now I don't compare about looks or whatever, but then she posted him on social media, today. What should I do?
It's my first time really going after a girl, becuase I'm just fine on my own, but this girl caught my attention.
Advice? What would you do?
Pic is viewpoint we ended up going too (unrelated)
>>17364216
>Next day I ask her on a date.
What'd she say to this? If it was anything other than an unequivocal yes, then she's not interested
Oh she was completely for the date, we met 3 days ago, and had the date yesterday, and that was when she mentioned the coffee shop thing
She mentioned the coffee shop during the date^
