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Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 1632. page


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How do you deal with emotional insecurity or vulnerability (However you put it), the thing is my childhood was hell though I basically like most kids just assumed that's normal and now these people interact like normal and I am also supposed to do it but it's like a war against big army for me, not something I am sure I can pull off. To put it simply
>be me
>grow up in a hellish country with hellish parent/*s
>get through the hell come out a monsterish person
>be 19
>start realizing people are actually massive hypocrites and are just pretending
>realize you're problem(one of many) was/is high intelligence and absolute hate for lies, abusing *literally anything because of the hell
>try to communicate like normal but people get weirded out
>motherfuckeritsnotmyfault.gif
>decides to hide own disappointment coz deep down I know I am the weird one
>be soo good at it no one can figure it out
>keep living through this hell

I don't think the damage can be repaired and I got mental disorders too but is it possible to at least get rid of this emo trouble?
>inb4 mak frinds
NO!
I can get through social interactions just fine when things are strictly subject oriented but they take too much of a toll.
2 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>16786536
>I can get through social interactions just fine when things are strictly subject oriented but they take too much of a toll
This is your problem, most people don't talk about subjects. They talk about feelings, things they enjoy, and other people.

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Hey dudes so I just bought a router I don't need so I'm thinking about returning it to Target.

I have all the parts and the box and receipt and put it all back inside like it was.

I don't even think the box was taped shut but idk I'll put a roll in my coat and check the boxes of the same product on the shelves.

Can I just return it like this?
2 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>16786526
yes.

Does anyone here go to the theater? and i mean the classical kind, not the movie theater.

I'd just like to know if they use speakers to amplify the sound of the performers and if so, how loud does it get? I have tinnitus and I don't go to movie theaters/concerts/etc because of it. i do not want it to get worse
4 posts and 1 images submitted.
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No way to guess this - I suggest earplugs!

Even the clapping for the encore can be painful.

Earplugs all the way - even sony walkman in- ear headphones cut a lot. Just have them with you at all times in there.
>>
I got sat next to some git at a Van morrison concert - he was like a clapping monkey with hands like butter patts .. I was ringing for days after that shit.
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>>16786507
I'm a theater critic and am out 3 or 4 times a week.

Almost all musicals are amplified these days, and for the big finales it sometimes feels like jet-engine-level decibels.

Almost no dramas or comedies are.

Most modern theaters are equipped with sound systems for the hearing-impaired. You borrow or rent (for a dollar or two) a set of earphones that broadcast the onstage voices without amplifying them for everyone else. I know hard-of-hearing people who swear by them. I don't know if they help with tinnitus, but they certainly wouldn't hurt.

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how to stop wishing I was born a white girl and hating myself all the other races?
33 posts and 4 images submitted.
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>>
What race are you?
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>>16786512
Mexican...

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Best way to deal with rejection?
12 posts and 1 images submitted.
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by realising it isn't the end of the world.
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>>16786492

This. There's like 7 billion people on earth. You'll be fine. Move on. Don't fuck around dwelling on it.
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What happened anon, how'd you get rejected?

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>live in small town
>have a neighbor with a loud as fuck Impala he runs at 6 am every day
>dumb fuck neighbor has an 18 wheeler
>he lets it idle for an hour at 6 am
>every single house next to me has a barking dog
>everyone's dog starts barking at 6 am for hours on end
>they are all violating laws with the dogs
>me and my parents both try reporting it
>they show up once and talk only to one neighbor and nothing changes

How do I get all these ass holes to fuck off? I seriously hear nothing but loud motors and dogs barking for hours on end every day at 6 am before the sun is even up. It's literally every single day and their dogs bark until like 11 pm too. It never fucking stops.
16 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>16786479
I can give you the aid to one of your problems: Dark chocolate covered coffee beans, talk sweet to them puppies and toss em a small handful. This method is cruel, but bloody Sharia probably allows it.
>>
I know it's hardly a just solution, but maybe you could try and set yourself into a routine of getting up at 6am? I find myself to be so much more productive in the mornings than the evenings, it might genuinely improve your quality of life.
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>>16786508
Yea but I work mid day

>>16786504
Strongly considering

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where or who to ask for coke or morphine? I'm a NEET.
7 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>16786443
A dealer is best bet.
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dark net markets
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>>16786447
how do i get one? Where do i find one?

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So I've been with my girlfriend for more than 2 years now, she's turning 18 this year, and everything seems perfect until we bring up the "first finish the school" subject. I don't want to ask for much since she has been diagnosed with depression the last year, and she is taking so many fucking drugs that is starting to annoy me how much sleep she needs, because of the pills. But my main issue with her is that she doesn't seem to understand how important is for me that she finish school, and she seems like she doesn't care. So, what should I do, how do I tell her to get fucking real with her studies without making her feel like shit?

Ps: sorry for bad spelling I haven't written in English for half a year
1 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>tfw gonna start doing online dating

Anything I should know before I make a profile?
12 posts and 3 images submitted.
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>>16786419
Have a big dick and be attractive
>>
Basically you need to sell yourself and your life style. You want the reader to go, I want to be part of that and I want a part of him.
>>
If you're male:
>Be perfect
>Be tall
>Be successful
>Be attractive
>Be confident
>Be Intelligent
>Don't be socially awkward
>Have a good body

If you're female
>Just turn up

>get drunk friday night by myself chilling on my balcony
>end up making conversation with neighbor ive never talked to before
>end up inviting her inside for drinks then fucking her
>shes excited about the encounter and texts herself from my phone that she wants to do it again0000
>talk to her today and it turns out she has 3 kids and is married
>i've seen her husband at the community fitness center and even had a few words with him
>feeling really shitty about it and dont know what to do

so if it wasn't me she would have just fucked the next guy who came along right?
12 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>16786333
Did you know she was married before hand?
If not, it is not your fault at all. She is the one with the commitment, and it was her responsibility to remove herself from a situation that she knew was likely to escalate.

I understand if you feel bad for the husband/kids because the mom's a fucking slut, but don't feel bad for sleeping with her. Are you going to tell the husband? I don't think he'd be angry if you apologized for not knowing and then came right out and gave him a heads up.
I mean he'll be pissed at his wife but if you're trying to help him out he won't be upset at you
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>>16786333
>so if it wasn't me she would have just fucked the next guy who came along right?

Maybe, but that doesn't make it okay to keep at it. If you really didn't know she was married with 3 kids (which is really fucking weird since she's your goddamn neighbor), forgive yourself for what happened and don't let it happen again.

Tell her you didn't know, and you don't want to be in that situation.
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You're single, you have no responsibility. She's the one cheating and you may as well be the one to get lucky. Even if you know, it's not even a moral question as you never stood in front of God and told him and your partner you were going to be loyal.

I've slept with a married woman before. She told me beforehand and asked if it was a problem for me. I said I don't care it's her business, and of course encouraged her by saying everybody DESERVES some fun to which she of course agreed.

Just enjoy it while it lasts.

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I'm not a likeable person. I've drifted away from any friends I've managed to make, and doubt I'm missed. Not that I can blame anyone but myself for being a useless, antisocial shit.

I don't even know what I want advice with. How to make myself believe people like me? How to make myself believe I like myself? How to find motivation and direction despite being useless and forgettalbe? I don't even know what would help.
17 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>16786329
Well, for starters, try doing good stuff, try being sincere and nice.
Then start liking yourself, that's one of the major obstacles, if you doubt yourself, others will see that and doubt you.
Then you can try befriending people, it's not that hard, try it on some irc chatroom. Afterwards, do it in real life :)
>>
I do try being nice - I'm just bad at it. And I've no idea how to start liking myself when it seems no one else does.

And I've had even less luck making friends on the internet. At least in real life people feel awkward ignoring me.
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>>16786329
http://www.101zenstories.org/101-zen-stories-table-of-contents/
Try reading these. Calm down, and just start trusting in yourself. Be nice to others, go joing rizon irc, and some random chatroom. Try it, it wont hurt :)

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Lost my job and my girlfriend a few months ago and I have been really depressed ever since. I find it nearly impossible to find any sort of motivation and go between feeling depressed and alone to just empty and numb. I had socially anxiety before is, but its gotten worse it seems. And I generally feel pretty worthless and inadequate.

Any advice for getting through social anxiety, getting motivation to find another job, getting through generally feeling like shit, and actually making myself appear attractive and desirable to girls?
3 posts and 1 images submitted.
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See a psychotherapist.
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Got an email man?

We can chat. I'm pretty suicidal myself because of a relatively similar situation.

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I'm 20 now, about 1 year ago I was extremely beta I had never had a serious relationship and was extremely unfit, I think I was also suffering from anxiety and depression. eventually I got sick of being depressed all the time and tried to actually turn my life around. 1 year on and I go to the gym, don't suffer any anxiety or depression. But now even though I am much more fit, I still have very beta tendencies. So my question is how do I go from being beta (with girls, with mates and with normal people) to being at least somewhat alpha? Is there steps I can take books I could read things I can do?

TLDR: How do I become Alpha?
2 posts and 1 images submitted.
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I'm not sure if you can become alpha. You can't really change your personality lol. Just be yourself, if you aren't alpha when you are being yourself, then there's nothing to do. But if you are too shy to be yourself, then that's the problem. Try to act the same as you would online, where nobody can see your face and judge you by your appearance..

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/adv/ocado

>have crush on girl at work that's grown so big it's beginning to scare the neighbors and worry the cat
>she work in a different department to me but occasionally we work alongside each other on various things
>can't tell if she is interested or indifferent to me
>she's leaving work and invites me along to her leaving thing, mentions it a few times and makes sure I'm coming
>she only invited me from my department
>she has a bf who treats her like crap
>her leaving party is this Friday, it's going to be a bar crawl... i.e. lots of drinking


Any suggestions on how to get closer to her/ maybe initiate something... at least her phone number/ social network?
TIA.
7 posts and 1 images submitted.
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she has a bf, forget her
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>>16786282
from what she says it's on the rocks.
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>>16786298
you probably have never had a female friend

All girls say that shit all the time. I have a friend who is always saying that she's going to break up and it's been 6 years since she started dating with this guy and they haven't. They'll probably marry. Girls tend to exaggerate a lot, and love to victimize themselves when they are with guys. She jus wants you as an emotional crutch, if she was attracted to you she wouldn't even mention her BF

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>dated a 15 year old girl online at 19
>few months until she turns 17
>she's not actually that far (2 hr flight), it was just the age thing keeping us apart

When is a good time to visit her? Is it really that wise to wait until shes 18?
8 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>16786243
I was the girl in this scenario once. BF flew cross country to take me to prom when I was ~16, he was 20. He stayed in our basement apartment and my parents "forbade" me from going downstairs. If you're looking to fuck her, make sure she has cool parents. Mine were like "we'll call the cops" but I know them and I knew they wouldn't, and they probably expected it to happen.

In my experience, my best advice is to not go behind her parent's back. Don't randomly show up and take their daughter without meeting them.

If sex isn't the reason you're waiting, then I think you should meet ASAP as long as she's ready :)
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>>16786269
Well fuck, I wasn't planning on meeting her parents. She's got very traditional Asian parents too so I'd worry for my safety. If it's necessary, how should we/I/my gf approach introducing me to her parents? I first met her in a vidya game when she was 13 for gods sake.
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>>16786275
Not the girl you're responding to, but you actually thought you could fly all that way and not meet her parents? Where did you think you were going to stay? Where did you think you were going to meet her and see her?

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