Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 783. page
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I have a nearly 4 year old nephew that lives with me, my brother uses me as free babysitting and works nearly every night. So I get to put him to bed some nights, other nights I'm not alone but the nights I am alone I have lots of time to observe his behaviors. Here are a couple points that I think are most important.
Note: I understand the nature of raising kids is subjective and usually is influenced by personal experiences. Please keep things civil.
Observations:
>the child will eye me periodically before doing something he isn't allowed to, such as throwing a toy or trying to climb on top of something.
>when asked to do something he will often just say no, shake his head, or laugh. If I move towards him he runs away screaming no and laughing at me.
>if he does something bad, throwing toys, hitting, or being 'mean' to the kitten he gets irritable and starts being mean and screams no while growling.
>if we ignore his bad behavior he will constantly try to get a reaction from us, by screaming, hitting, throwing stuff and my personal worst...slamming doors, opening them and screaming no. Then repeating.
>if we try to get him to do anything he does the opposite, if he has sticky fingers and we ask him to wash his hands, and not touch anything he instead touches everything at least once before playing with toys.
>other stuff. I asked him to put a pullup on for bed, then got a bedtime book, I turned around and he stared at me without touching the pullup and slowly spit onto the carpet. Before sitting down and screaming, singing and giggling out 'sit' which I assume means he can't make the sh sound and that I am also going to have to have a talk with whoever taught him that word.
Now the pediatrician said that some children are unruly until 5 or 6 but I don't know if I can handle his rude, mean, and often dangerous behaviors.
She also recommended spankings if he gets worse which we have tried, sparingly.
(1/2)
Pic unrelated
>>17141684
(2/2)
Spanking didn't help, if anything he didn't care and still acted the same. Some kids spankings help, some it doesn't.
Apparently he does nothing.
I have been babysitting, giving timeouts spending hours trying to get him to bed. Putting up with hours of him yelling at me. Saying he hates me, telling me he is a bad boy, saying he doesn't need to listen to me or saying he wants to kill me. I can't handle the constant stress of him being a sweet boy who likes iron man, to being a bundle of hellfire that hates me wants me to die and hits me.
Now a lot of the problem is that 2 weekends a month his mom gets him and we think she might be teaching him stuff, or letting him watch bad TV shows. Most of his comments we never hear until she drops him off and he goes wild and crazy.
Stuff we do to try and fix behaviors:
Button jar, he gets good job buttons which after he gets around 30 he gets a free toy.
If he is good we give him popsicles. Or small candy.
If he helps us, or is nice, polite we play outside at the park. With other kids.
We give him lots of positive reinforcement, rewards. Playtime. And anything he wants. But he just will not be controlled, and only does what he wants or he throws a fit..
I'm at the end of my rope and I just don't know what to do..can I have any advice on how to get him to be nice again.. At 2 years old he was the sweetest little boy ever. Now we can't take him in public without him causing a scene or being mean to someone.
Just any advice would work at this point.
>>17141684
>>17141739
SHOCK COLLAR
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Opie can't you stand up for yourself though? Your brother is USING you. To take care of a kid he doesn't want.
The child probably knows this and also knows that you aren't his real mom and is taking frustrations out on you.
How soon is too soon to go on a date with someone after a breakup?
Long story short:
>be me
>long term bf cheats and we break up
>I hate him but I still want to reconcile
>be two weeks later
>guy with mutual friends asks me to dinner
>said yes
>today is the day
Is it too soon?
>>17141681
highly advise you to not date ur exs friend, unless u want revenge. eventually ur friend will value the guys friendship than ur relationship
>>17141752
The guy who asked me out isn't mutual with ex but with other friends, probably should have specified that
you should go for it.
two weeks is long enough, plus he cheated and you hate him.
move on and worry about your new relationships.
How do I get my neighbors to arrest me?
>>17141680
are your neighbours cops?
in any case, walking up to them and punching one of them in the face should do the trick. or taking a crap on their lawn in full view.
why do you want to do this?
also fuck you just a bit for posting that pic and making me want to play with glitter and sparkly things like the faggot I am.
>Break into their house
>Shoot at their house
>Kill one of them
>Steal their car
>Shit in their lawn
>Climb on their roof, don't leave
>Almost kill one of them
>Barricade them in their house
>Set their house on fire
>Steal their TV
>Sneak into their house and sleep with them
>Steal their credit card
>Call them repeatedly
>Ask them nicely to call the police on you
>Slam your genitals in their window sill, get stuck
>Sneak into their chimney
>Nail yourself to their house
>Deconstruct their house
>Play music outside constantly
>Abduct their relatives for ransom
>Get framed for a crime they committed
>Convince them to join your cult and then take advantage of them financially until they report you for tax evasion
>Siege their house
>>17141705
Don't know their jobs but I don't think they are police
Had an argument with parents and I want them to arrest me because of that
Sup, /adv/.
I had a date with a girl last week and while I feel that it went well, I don't feel attracted to her BUT I would like to be friends with her and she seems like a pretty cool person.
What would be the most elegant way to go about this?
Both of our profiles say (so yeah, online dating) that we are looking for new friends or a relationship so I presume that there is a room to slide that way.
>>17141664
Just tell her "hey sorry but can we just be friends?"
Just be straight up and say that you dont feel a sexual connection but you do feel a friendship one
why
Any natural tips for concentrated, effective studying besides Adderall and this stuff?
I would realyl like to hear what works for you.
It's not about how long you study, but how many times you retrieve the material. Instead of memorizing for an hour straight, study for bursts of 20 minutes.
You can't passively look at your notes, and hope that it will all stick. Studying is an active process. This is why I also advocate taking notes by hand. Not only does writing encode the information better, in order to take written notes, you have to actively process the information, and sort out the relevant from the irrelevant information.
Make connections. When you're going over information, recall anything and everything you can think that it relates to. None of this stuff works in isolation.
Ask questions. Before you dive into the material, try to ask questions related to the topic that could realistically be answered after reading. And don't ask bullshit questions that only require you to find definitions. Ask questions that you genuinely want to know the answer to, and require you to process and organize information before answering.
Use dirty tricks. I had to memorize the names, composers, eras, genres, and other facts of over 100 pieces of music for an exam. One of the songs was Hound Dog by Willie May Thornton. I remembered by saying that the singer has a thorn in her ass, and that's why she's howling like a dog. Thorn=Thornton, and now I'll never forget it. It doesn't have to make sense to anyone else. It just has to make sense to you.
Pull information cold. When you're away from your studies, just pull up what you can. Anything. Just while you're doing something else, just try to pull information while your mind is cold.
There is no easy way to study. If you want to remember things, you need a strong brain. The only way you get a strong brain is by exercising it.
>>17141778
Thank you for your really helpful post.
Really appreciate that one.
>>17141816
I'm guessing that's what you're having to memorize?
I really need help figuring out if I'm gay or not /adv/ so here it goes
>be me two days ago
>be in a boring ass play during school with my good friend
>we will call him weeb for now
>sit right next to him
>a couple of days earlier when we were in gym running he tells me he is bi
>big surprise for me as he seemed to be REALLY into anime girls and lolis
>pretend to take it well
>on the inside I'm questioning every single thing I know about him
>back to assembly
> halfway in he starts vibrating his leg
>he does this a lot during classes so I theorize that he has adhd but who knows
>starts moving his leg towards me
>I don't know why but his leg feels so good
>quickly force it away
>every single 5 minutes I find his vibrating leg right on mine
>I didn't want to say it but it felt very very very good
>then about 70% through the play he says he wants to hold my hand
>wut.jpeg
>I tell him to fuck off but he says it so seriously I'm starting to wonder wether he is enjoying me
>I certainly am enjoying him but of course I don't say that
>10 mins later he tells me to put my hand on my knee
>ok now what
>he puts his hand on top of mine
>quickly pulling my hand away even though it feels great
>realize I have a warm feeling inside my stomach
>start to realize I might be gay
But I'm not sure so that's my problem
Please help me
>>17141651
You either like dick or don't. Judging from green text that was hardcore gay.
>>17141659
I agree with that statement however I can't explain the feeling I had and I don't like dick so what did all that mean
>thought once I got a job my parents would quit bugging me to make friends
>got one
>now fully functioning productive American
>they won't let up, still get bitched at all the time for spending weekends on my computer
I won't have enough saved for me to move out with a comfortable amount of savings for half a year...
How do I get them off my back?
Ignore them and wait half a year?
>>17141622
Explain yourself clearly to them. They're just worried. If not follow ignore parents route.
just explain to them that you are more happy being on the computer than socializing with people. Some people are like that and it's okay
where do lonely shut ins go to talk with other lonely shut ins in a cam format? Is it still tinychat?
should i ask /soc/
>>17141616
omegle video chat
idk any other cams
>>17141616
Probably. I head there when I'm really drunk
>TL;DR: 4 year old stumbles upon hardcore porn and watches it. Is he gonna be mentally scarred?
>Be me, 2nd brother of 5: (21, the rest are 24, 16, 13, and 4)
>Lurking
>Everyone's at home, but no one's paying close attention to 4 year old brother
>He usually just watches tv and plays with blocks, so there's usually no reason to pay close attention anyways
>Suddenly, everything goes quiet, which is never a good thing for my baby brother. It means he's doing something he isn't supposed to do
>He's watching porn
>I can hear the sounds of some bitch moaning as she gets her pussy drilled
>Everyone freaks out and heads to the living room (everyone but our mom)
>We all intervene and have to double check that everything's properly blocked
This isn't the first time something like this has happened.
>Little bro started a gas leak by sneakily tampering with the oven controls when no one noticed
>Little bro ingested a large, adult dose of THC when he found my mom's stash of 'special candy'
>Little bro snuck out of the house once, and caught the attention of the police who were nice enough to only give us a warning.
>Shattered mirrors, messed with power tools, set a towel on the stove and nearly set it on fire, etc...
Yeah... My mom gives only a fraction of a shit, which is just enough to keep child protective services from intervening at the drop of a pin. This isn't about my mom though. I wanted to ask about this specific situation that happened
Will my little brother be scarred in some way after watching hardcore porn? He only saw it for 30 seconds tops, but I could tell he knew he did something he wasn't supposed to do.
>>17141581
He probably won't remember it. It's not like he's being heavily exposed to it.
It's really no different than a kid walking in on mom and dad doing the dirty, which most of us have probably experienced.
There's plenty of shit that can fuck someone up, and you'll never know what it's going to be, but people are pretty resilient.
>>17141581
Maybe if he remembers, talk to him about the situation. It's very confusing and scary because lol look at porn from a non sexual view
>>17141581
Don't know why you decided to remake the topic. Your reactions to this, including grounding him in your room, will just confuse him and scar him even more than him finding out the porn. Sex is a natural act after all. Also since he's 4 he'll probably forget about it the next day like every other snot-nosed hyperactive kid.
Just pretend like nothing happened and treat your little brother normally, do not shame him for stumbling across the porn.
Posting here, because well...I don't have anyone in real life I can talk to about this.
A little background first. I'm a married mid 30s guy. Professional, doctoral level. Wife (K) is a late 30s teacher. 3 kids. Married a dozen years. My wife's best friend (L) is early 30s, with 1 kid. L is in a pretty miserable marriage. My wife and I started talking about an open marriage a couple of years ago. We didn't pursue it too heavily, until my wife had a conversation with L, and L let it be known that she would like to have sex with me. Even though my wife thought she would be cool with this, we actually decided not to do it, because it just made her too uncomfortable. So a few months pass.
Somehow, me and L just start texting. It started with innocent flirty sexy memes at first. Long story short, (too late), we're having a full blown affair. Wife and L are out together tonight having a girl's night. I'm at home watching the kids.
I don't know what kind of advice I'm asking for. I know I'm fucked. Because I have feelings far beyond just wanting to have sex with L. We've talked nonstop about how to keep this quiet. We've setup ground rules on how to do things together as low risk as possible. We've tried to break it off several times, but we keep coming back to each other, almost immediately.
I guess I just need some encouragement to quit for good.
>having an open relationship when you have 3 kids
Ew. Fuck this world
>>17141552
Lol you fucked up, hope the kids understand that lying and cheating are not good ways to live
>>17141552
It sounds like the relationship with L isn't the real problem. Your marriage is. Why did you feel the need to cheat in the first place? Even though you have an "open" marriage, this is still cheating since you're lying to your wife who expressed she specifically did not want you to see this person. I'm not being mean, but you really fucked up your marriage.
Your wife deserves to know that you're being unfaithful.
I want to tell her what I feel about her.
I've talked to her yesterday by messages and I won't see her until 2 week's for the last class (not sure if I will see hee) .
Shoulders Of tell her by messages to-day, ones after talking to her? Or wait until I see her.
I don't have any hopes, she already has someone but I want to get it off my chest, I never confessed to anyone before. I don't know what's to do.
>>17141520
Just tell her in person. She might have feelings for you too, but she might be hiding because she doesn't want to get hurt also. If she doesn't well dam, but it's better to fail and try rather to never have tried at all.
Just initiate a conversation. Be all like "o shit, waddup?"...
Seriously though, More context is needed here. Have you talked to her before?
>>17141567
I would have to wait 2 weeks and I don't want to pussy out by then.
I don't think she has feelings, she 22,I'm 19, she has some one since 3 or 4 years who is my opposite physically. He's very tall and she doesn't like short guys (which I am). I am very different from her bf I think
I just want to let that go, I don't want to have regrets but I never confessed before
>>17141570
We are in both college since 2 years, the years ended 2 days ago.
We were good friends in college, often being together there, and school working together. We could sometimes spend 3 hours on phone talking about work the evening but in the end just randomly talking and having banter.
Alsop sorry for messing up the thread, autocorrect fucked up
![Motley_Crue_-_Dr_Feelgood-front[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/eekTnlA.jpg "Motley Crue - Dr Feelgood-front[1]")
Hey, guys and gals.
The Doctor is in, so if you have a question about your health, your body, or what that green shit under your toes is, I'm willing to answer and put your mind at ease.
Thread theme for today is Nosia's Groundhog.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yTeE2Jeu5Kk
So what IS that green shit between your toes?
>>17141503
when I eat pork it causes diarrhea and cramping but bacon and other cured pork products don't. What's up with that?
>>17141553
It's any of a number of kinds of fungus. Athlete's foot is a catch all term for any kind of fungus that gets there.
Your feet sweat, and if you keep sweaty socks on for a long time, anywhere that doesn't move too much, like your toenails can end up with an environment that fungal spores can hitch up on.
Any athlete's foot gel or powder takes care of it. However, I have seen one case where antifungal powder didn't do anything. Turns out he just had sock lint stuck under his toe for like 3 weeks.
Im scared that i'm going to kill myself right now. I have 8 hits of ecstacy and im home alone.
>>17141485
DO IT FAGGOT
don't.
>>17141485
Lol eight ekkies.
That's a fun night for me.
Okay guys, I seripuslt need your help, this is starting to become a serious fucking problem, I don't really remember when or how it started, I'm introverted, but I am not depressed, or suffer and other mental issues at the time (which I am aware of, that is), I'm a hardcore /fit/izen, work out daily, people constantly complimenting my physique, but for a while now, I've been mutilating my toenails to the fucking point of this. HOW IN THE HELL DO I FUCKING STOP THIS SHIT? (Pic related, nail 1)
Pic 2, nail after I let it grow, so far I've only managed to get one to grow by focusing more on the other.
>>17141457
Looks like skin cancer, you might need to have that checked out. (Hope I'm wrong)
>>17141481
It's me picking at it dude, not fucking skin cancer. And I'm way wayyyyyy to young to have fucking cancer.
There's been a burning question I've had for awhile now. I'm a dick and I can make guy friends easily because of my dark and asshole humor but meeting girls is really hard because whenever I talk to them I come across as a
weird dick. What do?
>>17141446
don't be a dick in person, save that shit for the internet. Learn to be a socially acceptable dude in public.
>>17141453
But I'm boring when I'm not a dick
Same fucking problem, I can get girls to like me but I feel like a boring loser.
