Help me identify my dicks condition/STD.
Suspecting I got it from my gf (who is probably cheating on me)
>>545018748
you dont wash it often enough and squeze your dick too hard
>>545018748
It looks like you have GO TO A DOCTOR-itis.
>>545018748
AIDS - you got it from your boyfriend during buttsecks
Gather round people I must tell you a tale. The tale of moving in with druggies,betas who are alpha and sunflowers.
>be me
>move in with cool (ish) couple
>Dude is cool plays vidya
>Girl is kinda a crackwhore but who cares
>first day moving into new house
>has been empty for some time
>wonder why
>weird yellow house with sunflowers EVERYWHERE next door
>see 8/10 blue haired hottie in a bikini and dog collar mowing lawn
>stepupgame.jpg
>says she lives with "sir"
>fuck must be the bf
>says sir is sleeping (at 1pm)
>says i will meet him
>meet him later that evening
>HUGE bastard
>7' tall easy
>beta as fuck
>says hes an oldschool blacksmith
>looks like hambeast but hard to tell due to leather beta coat
>acts beta all evening
>roomies bail
>name him HBB (huge beta blacksmith)
>obsessed with sunflowers
>gives me weird honey wine he makes in his garage
>gives me shit over roomies bringing nigs over (their dro man)
>i go home
>1am hear loud as hell wooshing
>sounds like airplane
>holy fuck
>he has a massive fire going in stone frame in his back yard
>CLANGBONKWTF
>He is Banging on shit at 1am
>He is hitting something so hard its shaking my house
>go next door
>he is holding a hammer and beating the shit out of a large chunk of iron
>tell him to knock it off
>he gets really depressed
>says he will try to keep it down
>few weeks later BANG BANG BANG
>he is banging again
>call the cops
>roomies pissed about cops
>too high to care about banging
>see him crying wailing and bitching with
hold on trying tobang this shit out its kinda long
livefreenow.tumblr.com
Online now.,
>cont. Cops telling then he has to do it at night to see the colors
>2 months go by without banging
>he is always mopey
>has gas staition job
>qtgf says she might have to start stripping due to him not selling his iron
>roomies are up to meth now
>hear HBB and qtgf sobbing all the time
>housing board people stop by
>tell me its not friendly to call the cops
>notice necklace made of curled iron on housing guys neck
>fuck
>says to try to help him out
>I feel like shit
>go over to see HBB
>he is having dinner with Qtgf
>told him sorry for calling the cops
>he wiggs it and lifts me (one handed) by my hair
>thisishowidie.jpg
>qtgf tells him to chill
>he puts me down
>gives me steak
>tell him I will lay off the cops
>is happy that he can make inhuman ammounts of noise
>i buy headphones
>start hanging out with HBB
>he is still beta but kinda cool
>shows me how he makes things
>makes me a badass metal pot hanger for kitchen
>roomies becoming bigger nigs
>HBB still talks about sunflowere and walks around in faggotcoat
>HBB still cooler than roomies
>Suburb mafia still drops buy to make sure i'm being nice
>their yards are filled with iron benches and other crap he has made
>WTF
>he tells me how much this shit sells for
>gives me a door handle that looks like a bulldog sculped out of steel
>Roomies start shit with him over banging
>He is pissed about their dealer parking in his yard
>caughtinthemiddle.jpg
>stop hanging with him
>one day at home with roomies
>BANG louder at my .cont
Exilevilify_ thread update. It was a massive success.
We made her delete everything and go into exile (no pun intended)
>>545008795
why?
why would you tap on the fishtank dude- enjoy the view.
FB sluts
There was a fb slut who was into women"s gender studies. Named Erika Jensen. ever come across ?
Dog-Sothoth here. I do a shitty loli voice.
https://soundcloud.com/dog-sothoth
https://twitter.com/DogSothoth
Taking requests. I'll say most anything, not promising I'll pronounce it right though, but I'll try my best! I can do a loli voice, and my normal voice, if asked.
If you've been to my threads before: I deleted most of my old clips, trying to bring in higher quality stuff.
Last thread 404'd. Sorry.
https://soundcloud.com/dog-sothoth/baka-gaijin
Here's to the person who requested this!! It's a bit echo-ey/robot-ish but, I hope that's good enough, if you manage to come across the thread again.
>>544974280
A-And my pitch is lower than I would've liked.
>>544974280
dawwwwww
btw slightly deeper voice sounds better IMHO
>tfw finally found thread after refreshing catalog numerous times
I am new to Tor, what are some interesting things I should check out?
>>544957536
any fucking body
There's basically child porn, and people pretending to be hitmen, and drug dealers.
i heard the entire collection of harry potter books, audio books, and dvds is in there somewhere
ITT: Webm's/gif thread
Dump
Bump
ITT: Weird shit you do that if people knew you did it, no one would like you
>girl in my apartment building
>drops off a bunch of her stuff in my apartment building because she's moving out but can't get all of her stuff right away
>leaves her clothes in boxes in my apartment.
>late at night, feeling the urge, i go through her clothes.
>this is the second time iv done this.
>search high and low for her panties. Where are they
>after exactly 14 minutes, i find them. the holy grail.
>i begin my process. fap while covered in her entire collection of panties covering my body.
>sniff each one at least twice.
>find my favorite one which is similar enough to at least one other pair that she might not notice if it goes missing.
>pocket it and add it to my collection.
Last time, i was drunk and waiting for my friend to talk to his gf in her apartment that she shares with other girls. walk into one of the girls (who is smoking hot) rooms and search high and low for panties. find cute pink pair, stuff them in my pocket. i went to a club and had a normal night socializing with my friends, with the girl there who joked with me (unbeknownst to her, my pocket housed a pair of her used panties). Im new to this but i feel compelled to take a pair of panties and fap with them near me. (i dont wear them or anything)
it's late i guess no one is here.
just finished hand washing my pantie collection.
i stare at pics noticing at certain angles and with todays overexposed technology - nearly all photos are see through or have that capability... up to the point of x-ray... though it takes too much time and decent software...
I also watch skype vids of my x cheating on me while on skype with me. not going emo... masturbating... we are a strange race i swear
I pick my nose
The Most Perfect Pussy You have Ever Seen Thread
thats all you got?
Well /b/, I got fired and I need your help...
Today I went to my shitty supermarket job where I work so I can get money to buy videogames and to get experience and this happened:
PART 1/2
>wake up
>get ready to go to my job
>get to my job
>get to work
>am behind the cash register
>everythings going good
>untill a few assholes from my class show up infront of the store
>they bug me
>i try to get them away from the store
>go to the manager
>tell whats going on
>he says that i just have to put up with it and he cant do anything
>go back to the cash register and try to get back to work
>theyre still bugging me
>i cant work
>break comes along
>go to the manager
>tell him either they go away or i fight them
>he tells me that if i fight them i will be fired, but he agrees to tell them to leave or that he will call the cops
>he goes to tell them but they left and are nowhere to be seen
>thankgod.png
>manager tells he has to go
>break ends
>have to go put products on the shelf and shit
>am stacking the milk cartons
>assholes come back and are in the store
>goddamnit.jpg
>they come to me
>bug the shit out of me to the max
>one faggot thinks its funny to drop a milk carton
>milk all over the floor
>assholes laugh
>[anger intensifies]
>grab a milk carton
>smash faggot against the head with it and then try to beat the shit out of him
>other faggots storm at me
>beat the shit out of me (1 vs 5)
>2 co workers notice it and get in the fight trying to help me
>they help a little but they are also fucked
>schizophrenic co workers hears the shit happening
>he comes and sees me bleeding and the 2 co workers getting beat up
>see him run away
PART 2/2
>thatfuckingpussy.mov
>he sneaks back on them with a thick wooden plank
>smashes their legs with the plank
>they fall down
>me and the 2 other coworkers get back up and beat the shit out of them
>we tell them to leave
>let the 4 other shits leave and i decide i cant let the main asshole go without giving him a final punch to the face
>i do that with all my power
>one of his front teeth falls out
>thatamazingfeel.gif
>let him leave
>notify manager of what happened
>he comes back and tries to fire all of us but i get him to just fire me
I have to admit, I felt pretty good after it all happened, but the problem is that this accident that happened will get me a criminal record AND I'm afraid they will press charges against me...
It happened a few hours ago and I haven't gotten a call from the police or something like that so I don't know if anything will happen.
If I do get a criminal record and if they do press charges, how do I handle this? Having a criminal record makes getting a job real hard...
Help me.
Nice dude. I bet that felt great. I doubt you will get in much trouble. Especially if it was on camera. At most just aggravated assault.
If i'm not wrong, isn't this part of the manager's fault? To not be able to keep their worker in a safe working condition.
First sexual experience thread
>>544461215
Are you gonna start OP or are you just going to be a huge faggot like always.
Girl that had a crush on me for years got me drunk and lured me into the woods to have her way with me. Was 14ish.
>>544461601
sounds kinda shitty
Ask a guy who was molested by an older woman, when he was a kid, anything.
Last thread died, so I will repost the story again. If you guys want it to live you have to post too!
This will be the fourth installment of the misadventures of Rayne and my younger self, Trice (birth name Trevor.) Sorry I couldn't post last night, my roommate needed a ride all over the place and I didn't get home until late.
I will start with part four, then repost parts 1 through 3.
when i was a kid i molested an older woman.
>>544444702
Our fourth encounter happened a month or so later. I had just started a four day weekend and was very excited! I knew exactly how I was going to spend it too. Rayne had just gotten Ocarina of Time for me, as she would buy things for me as a sort of bribe to keep my mouth shut. I was going to spend the entire four days plowing through the lands of Hyrule, exploring, being a hero, and saving the world. I had already started the game, but only just got my sword and shield, so I had a long way to go.
Since it was a holiday weekend, my mom had a bunch of her... “friends” over. If they were all just pot heads then it might have been bearable, but a lot of the guys preferred to drink too, and liked being bullies. So when the first of them arrived I had an idea of what was going on, and decided to avoid them and hold up in my room. It worked at first, they all stayed out there, while I played in my room and made my way through The Great Deku Tree.
However, to help drown out all of their noise and crappy music, I would up the volume on my TV. I guess someone heard what I was playing and opened my door with out even knocking. I turned around to she this tall white guy, short cropped hair, and had a voice which made me hate everything about him. He had picked on me a lot, especially when he knew my mom was no were to see him (she at least cared enough to stop these assholes from physically abusing me, since I would threaten to tell my school counselor how I got bruised at home, who would report her to CPS in a heartbeat.) Anyway, this ass, his name was Jeff, and he shouted to the apartment, “What the fuck!? Yo! Trash has the new Zelda game!” He would call me ‘Trash’ instead of ‘Trice’ all the time.
Why the fuck has the thread 404ed ?
Made fun of this alpha nigger thoughout a couple years in highschool
wanted to share best
gen nigger thread
Jerry, you're a bitch.
>>544409558
Jerry ur bitch xD
Hey Jerry Sablich, how's Johnson City, New York going?
Can I get some suggestions for rap?
I'll explain myself
So after seeing a few threads this past month or so talking about rap, I finally decided to give the genre a go. I am a huge EDM fan, and I live for genres like Deep House, Trapstep etc etc. I've always loathed rap (at least every bit of it which I heard) because it just seemed like a black man complaining about how his life was very hard but now he's going to list to me how many women have given him STIs and how many cars he can fit in his latest hoe's vagina or some bollocks like that.
I figured I'd start with Kendrick Lamar, seeing as there was that whole hubbub about "Good Kid, m.A.A.d City" not winning some award and I wanted to see what all the complaining was about. It was ok, I liked some of the beats and I guess his lyrical content was above average for a rapper.
So I've taken a stab at listening to Chance the Rapper, Lupe Fiasco, Childish Gambino and then, on suggestion from a work colleague, some "old skool" stuff from the likes of 2Pac, Notorious BIG, N.W.A. and Nas
Some of the songs I recognised from hearing as I was growing up, others were ok. I know there are a couple of you out there who are proponents of rap and could suggest me stuff.
This isn't a thread for "oh post the most underground person you know because you're so cool", I'd like suggestions which have both good, meaningful lyrical content (wordplay etc is a bonus) and generally good beats in the genre of rap.
I'd be very appreciative for any suggestions.
And no, do not tell me to listen to Eminem, I've given him enough of my time to decide he's ok but not really all that special.
Rakim (anything, this guy was ahead of his time)
Enter The Wu Tang
A Tribe Called Quest (Midnight Marauders)
Nas (Illmatic is iconic)
>>544388648
Atmosphere
yeah dawg
Juicy J, J. Cole, Tyler the Creator, YG, Tyga, ScHoolboy Q, Kanye (if you haven't heard Yeezus go listen like now), Chief Keef and Lill' Wayne
So Donald Sterling got banned from the NBA for life AND he has to pay $2.5 million in fines.
For something that was supposed to be a private discussion between him and his chink girlfriend.
How does that make you feel /b/?
>pic related
>>544375125
source:
http://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-27214758
>>544375125
If he doesn't like niggers, why the fuck does he go to basketball games?
bunch of white liberal guilt going on. I wonder how liberal they'll be once the niggers and spics take over this dying country.
