Rule 34 thread
Ringing mad moxxi
moar lois/franny pls
Whats the drunkest you've ever been /b/?
>be a freshman in college
>rip 16 shots of admiral within an hour
>go outside for a cig
>need to yak, go behind a tree and puke 4 times for 30 mins
>friends take me back to my dorm
>take a shower, puke in the shower
>call campus police on myself to take me to the hospital
>dehydrated, need an IV
>BAC @ 0.390
doing college right
bamping, greentext inbound
>>578560915
Loser
>>578560915
>Going to hospital for minor dehydration
I hope you are 'murrican so you had to pay to fix being thirsty.
Riddle for ya, if you can solve it you'll win 10 mill on runescape.
im green and sticky, salty but sweet, you can cook me but you wont feel the heat.
WEED
>>578575129
no.
feel free to ask yes or no questions.
its seaweed. it creates soda ash when you cook it
dumping pics of my ex-gf post if you want I just want to dump her slut face on here
>>578576181
>>578576181
Bumping for interest
Interested. Might dump my exes pics. Fuck that bitch. I got a vid of her dildoing her ass.
loli bread
bump but no pics :(
New bred, gay shit. Go!
Old thread: >>578539319
The ride never ends!
>>578556603
dat ID
>>578556945
Pinecest is the best.
which to fuck and how?
None, because OP is faggot
>>578566946
I wanna make sweet love to left
>>578566946
This is an easy one::
First, slowly stalk each them until you find where their house/apartment/mobile home keys are. Then, break into their abodes each day, only moving their furniture and decorations over a foot each. Do this for about eight months. Then, when they slowly start to go insane with the ghost in their home, be their shoulder to cry on. Tell them nothing is going on and that they are fine. Then, over another eight months, move their furniture less. They will start to realize they aren't insane and that you were right all alone. They will thank you for being there in their hour of need. Take them all out to dinner and discuss your lives and the good times you have had. Make them enjoy their rehabilitation. After they finally warm up to your friendship, make a move to show you want to be more than friends. Slowly let your relationship with them sink in and grow stronger each day. Then when you think they are ready, tie them up and brutally anal fuck them with a jackhammer till their ass looks like a sinkhole. Climb in and make your new home.
Have you ever done anything to a sleeping girl?
Yep. I've covered them up with a blanket when necessary...AS SHOULD YOU.
>>578559702
faggot
Yes I have.... So continue on
ITT: Make a video game title better by replacing one word with "nigger"
>>578568342
Call of Nigger
The Legend of Nigger
>>578568342
Grand Theft Nigger
New wincest thread, the other was turning into a shit storm
>Be me 2 years ago
>Its around this same month of the year
>Headed to cousins birthday party
>Say hello and proceed to head to her little brothers room cause im more into xbox than shitty hiphop music
>She comes in and tells me to hang out with her and her friends
>Get outside and her friends are swaggots
>Try my best not to puke at the smell of rotting stretched earlobes around me
>Tell cousin ima go smoke a joint i brought in an alley and ask if she wants to come but not her friends
>Escape from swag group and light up
That whole year was the time i started actually dedicating myself into getting fit. Didnt have much aesthetics but i was still fit
>She notices my biceps and reacts to them saying "Wow last year you didnt have any muscle! Im impressed"
>I laughed it off and joking told her "thats not the only thing that grew" Because when im high i dont care what comes out of my mouth
>She blushes alittle and laughs
>Get back to the swag group that are now holding beers they snuck kek
>Red eyed my dad says hes gonna leave and if i want to leave with him
>Cousin begs him to let me stay over the weekend and he does
Also, girl in the picture is my cousin
She's too fucking cute
>Fast forward to end of party
>My cousin and i are now in her room watching a movie
>Shes wearing a tank top with no bra and some sweat pants
>When everyone is asleep she takes out this bong ive never seen before and asks if i want to smoke some bowls with her
>Fuckyeenigga
>Now im high and shes high
>It got pretty hot in her room cause of her heater and i took of my shirt
>At first she ignored that i did this and then she complimented the slight chest gains i had
I tried giving her a friendly punch just like the scene from Superbad when Evan tries to punch the girl he like but ends up hitting her boob. Yea i dont know how i missed her arm but i punched her boob
>She laughed and said "You jerk!" And lunged at me at the same time she also spilled bong water all over my pants
>We both couldnt hold back the laughter and she said she was sorry and gave me a towel
>I took off my pants and wrapped myself in the towel
Thing started to turn from here
>She asked me a lot of random questions about my workout routine and so on and then asked me if i had a girlfriend at the moment
>I told her i didnt and she started to touch my pecs
>I made them dance the best i could and she giggled and told me that it was hot
>And at this point the alpha took control
>I grabbed her hand and placed it on my crotch
>She didnt move it, she didnt say anything
>She stood up and sat on my lap
>>578552289
cont?
>>578552289
Keep it going
Bogwarts part 7! Fuck your democracy and votes edition!
Evening /b/!
Onyxdime here; and tonight we’re continuing Bogwarts School of Bitchcraft and Jizzardry.
It’s a new set of rules, so take a 30 seconds to read over them.
1.) Anons will play as a girl in a attending Bogwarts.
2.) There is no specific goal except for what you make of it. You will attend classes, socialise, and discover quests to go on if you want to.
3.) If you are well respected you will be treated better, gain stronger allies, and generally be safer. However, if you do not command respect, you may find yourself catcalled, groped, molested, and even worse in the castle’s corridors.
4.) Anons will vote on what action they want the character to take. The action with the most votes wins.
5.) Sometimes you will have to roll for various tests. e.g. a strength or intelligence test. You must roll EQUAL TO OR BELOW what OP states. Rolling between 0 and 15 counts as an epic win. Rolling 85-100 counts as an epic fail and will have extra negative modifiers applied to it.
6.) No scat/guro. The character’s age will never be specified, nor will the age range of students at Bogwarts. It could very easily be an institution for adults, much like a university. Or it may not be if the reader doesn’t want it to be that. All characters are whatever reasonable age readers want them to be.
7.) You will climax every time your orgasm meter hits a multiple of 100%. The larger the number, the more intense the orgasm will be. Your orgasm percentage will slowly decrease over time to the last multiple of 100% that you reached. It will decrease by 100% every time you go to bed and rest.
Enjoy storytiem? Why not consider supporting Onyxdime on Patreon for $1?
Check out Patreon dot com forwardslash Onyxdime
Read the story so far here: tinyurl q2tu7gc
posting for color
frist
Pingas
If you fagots can count to 10 I'll cover this pill bottle in tabasco sauce, and shove it in my ass. I'll will post pics.
1
your going to shove it in your ass regardless you faggot
2
Attention:
You won't believe me, but I am from the year 2042. If you live in the united states, (particularly near Chicago, New York City, or the district of Columbia) you need to prepare for nukes. December 21st of 2014, North Korea will launch 3 mid-sized ballistic missiles towards the three locations mentioned above. The missile headed towards the district of Columbia will be intercepted and explode about 50 miles to the west of Bellevue, Washington, and some structural damage will occur. President Obama will launch a retaliation about 30 hours after the first missile was intercepted over Bellevue, and it will ultimately succeed, but will cause some controversy because of the innocent lives lost when Obama struck North Korea. If you have any questions please reply and I will answer them. I am asking that you do not document any of this (screenshots, etc) because it is illegal for me to be doing this, but please spread the word while not mentioning that you got this information from this thread.
North Korea's missiles don't have that capability.
I don't believe you, pics or it didn't happen.
Rate my sister /b/?
we can't without proper photographs
>>578528193
Need more pics, man.
she is a cutie, id fuck you all night and day!
porn webm thread.
>>578546815