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/brit/


Thread replies: 488
Thread images: 55

File: jannys nuts.jpg (31KB, 468x281px) Image search: [Google] [Yandex] [Bing]
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emasculation of the janitor edition
>>
deshi basara
>>
What's it like to get naked with a girl for the first time lads?
>>
>>62216148
dunno
>>
He's not going to like this one. I daresay his nut might even be damaged by it.
>>
>>62216080
you're a fucking faggot to think about the caretaker's testicles
>>
>>62216080
exceptional post
>>
>>62216148
probably awkward
>>
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>>62216148
tfw
>>
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https://youtu.be/v24MQkmeBh0?t=383

who sent tim a papa johns?
>>
>>62216249
Do you want to touch mine?
>>
>>62216080
pack it in
>>
>yanks

ah yes, let me cut a piece of my dick off so girls will like me

https://www.reddit.com/r/videos/comments/4t9242/child_circumcision_an_elephant_in_the_hospital/d5fok8n?st=iqqtrgg2&sh=2db44aed
>>
Voting in this poll is mandatory

http://www.strawpoll.me/10768803

http://www.strawpoll.me/10768803

http://www.strawpoll.me/10768803
>>
barracking and harassing my foes
>>
might take a trip to edgbaston reservoir

anyone been?
>>
>I've seen some vaginas that look like a hand got blew off by a firework.

kek
>>
>>62216148
fine when you're an adult
awkward and scary when teenager
>>
>searching for something on Google
>click on a forum link
>reading the thread
>see a forum member with 10,000+ posts
>"Permanently Banned" under their username

Evokes a strange feeling tb︃h. Like you know that that person spent weeks of their life reading and posting on that forum and then they had it all taken away from them by some overzealous mod who took a grievance to some post they made.

Yeah the user might have asked to be banned but that's less likely.
>>
>>62216080
bender
>>
>>62216343
FONT
>>
Memorable client of the day turns up wearing a suit kind of balding with glasses says he is a teacher and looks the part. He was really quiet didn't say much but seems nice has a shower and before we get down to it he starts talking about his wife and kids for some reason I really didn't wanna know.

Starts saying his wife doesn't love him and they stay together for the kids this big long sob story meanwhile I'm just trying to get the condom on him so we can get the booking going. What he was doing wasn't bad it was just that he kept talking saying how his wife is all the names you can think of and then "You know what I want don't you, you really love it" tries to pull my hair a bit too hard in the process until I tell him off. Mostly I was trying not to laugh.

What I did laugh at is after he gets done he sits down on the bed and takes the condom off himself and just holds it in the air looking at it not saying anything for a couple of minutes so I go to bring the bin over and the wet wipes sit next to him and pop a hand on his shoulder and then he starts crying asking if I think he's an idiot. At this point I cracked up.
>>
>>62216269
>Tim's coke nail

oh dear oh dear
>>
>>62215576

RARE
A
R
E
>>
Love the gf lads.

Especially when she does my laundry.
>>
>>62216252
anxiety about impotency or your period
>>
>>62216080
gay edition
>>
just got out of the shower
>>
>>62216368
kys
>>
>>62216369
I've had a meeting with an amazing duo of sales reps on Friday.

>deathly pale, very skinny man
>looking very anxious and unable to maintain eye contact
>brown combover
>suit two sizes too big for his frame with narrow peaked lapels
>brown-tinted thick spectacles
>tiny unbuttoned collar
>ENORMOUS Windsor knot on tie, maybe one fourth of it fit between the collar
>wide tie with colourful WW2 planes scattered over olive background

>huge, grey-haired fatso
>very wide, very yellow grin with a couple of teeth missing
>suit with very wide open lapels
>french cuffs
>cufflinks with Batman logo
>bottom button in shirt unbuttoned
>fat, hairy belly visible through the hole
>wide spread collar
>itty-bitty knot on a very narrow plain red tie

They looked like they've just walked out of a very silly sketch but I managed to remain stone-faced.

Then the fat one opened the meeting by spending five minutes telling me that even though he voted for Brexit he personally has nothing against Polish immigrants or me in particular (I'm Polish).

They knew their shit though.
>>
>>62216369
absolute adore this gimmick, keep it up
>>
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poofs
>>
>>62216421
didn't read any of this lmao
>>
>>62216080
the janitor has his testicles intact and knows how to get around
>>
>>62216381
i usually just dream about losing my teeh. or just a slightly different version of the previous day, makes it pretty hard to determine what's real
>>
>>62216393
>faux leather placemats

pleb central
>>
>>62216397
>kys
Kill yourself
>>
>>62216080
by the way janitor has great abs has a big dick
>>
>>62216463
I draem my cock is detachable, like a click on tie
>>
>>62216498
kys wasteman
>>
any london lads here

anything interesting I can do tomorrow
>>
my poo always looks different to the poo of porn stars in scat porn

they always look like they have soft, light brown, squishy, wet poos, long and thin sometimes

meanwhile mine look quite dark, solid, rock-like, like logs even
>>
>>62216498
*kyses you*
>>
>>62216369
what sort of retard doesn't inspect their cummies?
>>
>>62216524
*blows you a kys*
>>
>4 way junction of two dual carriageways with 50mph speed limits
>traffic lights out
>traffic everywhere, everyone honking

That was unnecessarily stressful
>>
>>62216522
I sometimes have to stand up slightly because the majestic column is too tall to fit in the bowl with me sitting there.
>>
Whenever I get drunk af, my shit smells like Calpol the next day. What does this signify?
>>
>>62216509
castration anxiety

you're still psychosexually undeveloped, what id expect from a child
>>
Imagine being a weatherman. You literally get paid to say whatever and no one even gives a fuck if you're right or wrong because everyone understands that the weather cannot be accurately predicted.
>>
>>62216432
>you now remember jade goody

kek
>>
>song about destructive drug culture and how it leads to an unfulfilling and hedonistic lifestyle
>gets remixed into a dance song that will no doubt be played in Ibiza clubs to Essex lads gurning their tits off and shuffling in hurraches

ah yes
>>
>>62216573
Weather forecast is where they relegate shitty / failed journalists.
>>
Having a hard time coming to terms with the fact that sitting around the house all day in my undies is all I'm going to end up doing for many years to come lads.
>>
>>62216585
what song lad
>>
>>62216567
>psychology bobbins

grazie luigi
>>
>>62216573
>Imagine being a weatherman
Why though when I can imagine being the weather lady and having a VERY active sex life.
>>
*powerbottoms you*
>>
>>62216563
i have to poo standing up or my willy will get wet
>>
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>>62216585
that is evolution my friend

evolution
>>
>>62216585
house every weekend?
>>
>>62216635
I guess https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oh2LWWORoiM
>>
>>62216573
weathermen sometimes get harrassed on the streets for telling wrong predictions
>>
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>>62216647
>>
>>62216635
>>62216676
>>62216668
I TOOK A PILL IN EBEEZAH
>>
Why didn't peter hitchens want the eu referendum?
>>
>>62216676
is this the ""dance""" remix

couldn't shuffle to this lad
>>
>>62216644
Genuinely never seen a weatherwoman who I would not smash (or who isn't already pregnant because someone else has already shagged her rotten).
>>
>>62216647
*go to my happy place*
>>
>>62216666
What in the fuck is that specimen?
>>
For years I have had a recurring dream about sucking my own cock
>>
>>62216678
>telling wrong predictions
Bit more serious in Iceland though, people will have a right go at you, cause you didn't predict the volcano that erupted and wiped their entire village out.
>>
>>62216723
No, that's the original
>>
>>62216676
bit trannysexual music imo
>>
>>62216585
>>62216705

If Mike Posner was really serious about the message of the song he would have knocked them back when they came to him for the rights for the remix.

But nah he bit their hands off for the money.
>>
Well, from what I've gathered, blood can represent many things, no one seems to agree on it, and pissing in your dream just means you need to piss irl
>>
First client of the day at the parlour, only rinsed himself in the shower, pissed in the shower, had black fungal toenails, slightly less disgusting fingernails, wanked him off for 10 minutes before noticing he had something crawling in his pubes....at first i thought he had crabs, but now know they were body lice. Fucking awful. I nearly scrubbed my skin off in the shower. Cried and went home.
>>
>>62216761
what's the remix
>>
>>62216787
if the tories were serious about it they'd tax the bankers the bonuses the 90%
>>
>>62216787
well he hasn't had a hit in years he was probably running out of money
>>
>unironically going to the type of club where people that shuffle go to

kekmao
>>
>>62216809
You deserve it you wretched tart
>>
>>62216809
are you a dude
>>
>>62216754
there was a big volcano scare a few years ago. it was so hyped up that i almost felt disappointed when it didn't erupt
>>
>>62216787
>>62216828
this Tbh the remix is bigger than the original now and he only had 'cooler than me' apart from that
>>
>shuffling post 2014

this doesn't happen
>>
> going out
very runty
>>
>>62216828
No word of a lie I actually read an article about him before the Seeb remix song came out where he literally said that his financial advisor told him he had enough money to have the luxury of not working ever again in his life.

And that was all off the back of his one previous hit, 'Cooler Than Me'.
>>
>>62216148
Exciting, somewhat awkward, clumsy, not as amazing as you thought it would be but still pretty fucking good
>>
>>62216869
kill yourself nerd
>>
Client books me for an hour (in a hotel) and does not disclose his condition - severe incontinence.

Turns up in a NAPPY saturated with piss and then looks crestfallen that I will not do OWO (room is reeking).

How I stomached it I will never know but I just got on with the very basics (it was a quiet day). When I stop (on the dot!) he then proceeds to put back on, the said drenched nappy.
>>
>he's not ironically but sort of unironically into hardstyle

lmoa
>>
>>62216881
Google says he's got about 4 million quid
>>
>>62216856
I think I remember hearing about it, are there any settlements close the volcanoes, could a Pompeii like scenario happen again?
>>
>>62216899
keep it up lad
>>
>>62216899
have you ever had a client with a detachable cock
>>
@889
hit a nerve, did I? Runt. Squeal for me.
>>
>>62216899

THIS is Cameron's Britain
>>
>he doesn't go to every Bounce By The Ounce event

lmaoing right now.
>>
>>62216899
what is wrong some people

can imagine ribena getting something like this wrote about him if he went through with it
>>
>>62216935
fuck off nerd
>>
still got some flubromazepam left over

dunno what I'm gonna do when this is out
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MrzPmUlSCHQ

this desu
>>
Is "I don't agree with your opinion but I agree with your right to say it" the most meme fedora response ever?
>>
@972
Good boy. Louder! Squeal for daddy like a good little runt.
>>
*slowly and deliberately presses long pointy high heel into the groin of a terrified runt*
>>
>>62216992
so brave x
>>
>>62216999
Quite pathetic tbf mate.
>>
>>62216976
surely some international sellers will ship to the uk
>>
Exteremely overweight guy who wanted gfe.

So first he squished me (I'm not tiny but jeez I'm not that big either!) and then he plunged his fingers in me (Which I don't offer.) and scraped me hard with his nails. Kissed me, shoved his tongue in and slobbered all over, and had bad breath.

Then he tried to go in without a condom and was warned and said he wasn't ready to go in yet...and a few minutes later just dove in with no condom, no warning.

And the whole time I was thinking what the fuck is that smell?! Turned out it was shit stuck to the inside of his ass cheeks.
>>
>>62216995

yeah, free speech is so fedora

hate speech is not fee speech
>>
>>62216995
yes Voltaire was the original fedora

>>62216999
where u live at mate
>>
VOTE VOTE VOTE
http://www.strawpoll.me/10768704

http://www.strawpoll.me/10768704

http://www.strawpoll.me/10768704

http://www.strawpoll.me/10768704

http://www.strawpoll.me/10768704
>>
>>62216976
Go through pretty horrible withdrawals.

>falling for the benzo meme
>>
used to do cybergoth dancing about 7 years ago

hard to say if I have become less or more autistic since
>>
http://youtube.com/watch?v=2YQ5le2S3NM

Post comfy tunes
>>
@020
@040
Perfectly trained little squealers.
>>
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me irl
>>
>>62216359
I have thought about this before also

Also strange how people have 10k posts on really obscure forums like VAUXHALL ZAFIRA FORUM
>>
>>62217042
Do people drink in Morocco (outside of Western hotel bars)?
>>
>>62217042
>http://www.strawpoll.me/10768704
Only ever heard bad things about Algeria, mainly from Frogs saying they hate them.
>>
Does your queen have anything to do with how the country is run? I know she has some power but does she ever do anything of importance?
>>
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>>62216917
i believe this is the village closest to katla
>>
>>62216359
Say what you want about 4chan janitors but I regard them higher than vbulletin moderator runts
>>
Is the US headed for a legit race war?
>>
>>62217081
>'''''people''''' that go to Ibiza

fucking lel.

Deano and Gazza spaffing 3 months of wages on NV Veuve Cliquot then going to some shitty commerical house night in the evening.
>>
>>62217042
might be a tad biased
>>
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>>62217124
Only ceremonial stuff. She also has private conversations with the Prime Minister, so who knows what she says in those.
>>
>>62217042
Been to Morocco, only good part was the hotel
>>
>>62217124
She could have more influence, but she chooses not to, and stays primarily as a figure head and representative of our country.
>>
>>62217102
A lot of this generation's 18+ y/olds do, why?
>>
Wish I could get on the benzos but it's the only drug my parents have ever asked me "are you on drugs" just from the afterglow the next day

once I move out might become a benzo fiend
>>
>>62217133
10/10 would live in
>>
>>62217150
Why? something new happen?
>>
You won't believe me lads but I was literally in Nice for the lorry attacks. Only just got home tonight because I was there on holiday. I was pretty deep into the crowd and we didn't know what was going on. Looking back you could see and hear people yelling and pushing forward then suddenly people were running. I started running just because I heard the screams, I didn't even know the lorry was coming at first. We were just running down the road but pretty soon you could actually hear the lorry, like you could hear the engine and then the thumps as it made contact. By this point it was loud as fuck and I was running as fast as I could but some fat fuck in front of me decked it and I went down with her. On the tarmac I turned over and I could see the lorry coming towards me and the police were already firing shots by this point into the cab but it was still moving forward. I genuinely thought I was going to die then and there and I just closed my eyes. The lorry was still going under inertia and it rolled right up to me. As the 20 tonnes of steel and glass bore down upon me I could feel the heat of the rubber tires between my legs as they rolled agonizingly over both of my soft bollocks; popping them like boiled eggs.
>>
>>62217158
moroccan immigrants - become scum of the earth criminals and form street gangs

algerian immigrants - massacre numerous people in france every few months
>>
>>62216359
I got a forum account I was rather fond of permabanned by some dickhead mod for disagreeing with him in a thread. Two years later I remembered about the account and asked for my ban to be repealed, and the SAME MOD came back and denied my case.

Biggest fucking runts out there.
>>
>>62216976

what's the darknet offering? i imagine it's just etizolam and maybe pyrazolam?
>>
>>62217168
Just wondered. Saw a cheap holiday to Marrakech so was considering going for a few days and would probably enjoy drinking out there.

What's the best city to visit?
>>
>>62217133
Iceland looks cosy, need to go one day.
>>
>>62217133
what sort of jobs do people have here? do they commute large distances?
>>
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>>62217190
the village life is a comfy existence
>inb4 volcano destroys it
>>
>>62217193
Some cop got shot

>>62217163
Sorry to hear I guess :/

>>62217158
You mean you might be a bit biased against Morocco? vote for Algeria if you like, as long as its your honest opinion.
>>
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>>62217203
EXCELLENT POST
>>
>>62217203
Exceptional post
>>
>>62217203
Good post
>>
one dance is a tune tbqh
>>
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>>62217203

lucky!
>>
Is learning to drive hard?
>>
>>62217221
No idea, haven't looked, but if I was going to get benzos off the darknet I'd buy actual pharmaceutical stuff like diazepam and alprazolam instead of the leftovers made in someone's garage from the RC business.
>>
>>62217253
L O N D O N
O
N
D
O
N
>>
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>>62217188

>mfw i've been struggling with benzo addiction for over 2 years now

HPPD combined with kindling benzo withdrawal is absolute hell, could be used as torture
>>
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>>62217203
>>
>>62217222
Tourists seem to love Marrakesh but I personally hate it, its smelly and the people are cancerous
Dunno where else to suggest but just don't go to Casablanca or Fes and you'll be fine
>>
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>>62217203
>>
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>>62217237
Whats the capital like? Is it bad or do you like it?
>>
>>62217208
the loony lorry lad was tunisian

zidane is all I can think of when it comes to algeria

moroccans are kanker
>>
>>62217203
Utterly amazing post
>>
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>>62217203
>>
KC tier general
>>
>>62217253
why does she dress like a spice girl
>>
>>62217313
What's wrong with Casablanca?

How about Tangier? Looks nice.
>>
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>I could feel the heat of the rubber tires between my legs as they rolled agonizingly over both of my soft bollocks; popping them like boiled eggs
>>
in love lads
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fPUMCO8YIxE
>>
>>62217301
So how much did you take to actually give yourself HPPD? Because I've taken a lot and do not experience it.
>>
>>62217159
What kind of person does she seem to be?

>>62217166
Does anyone know why she chooses not to? Do you think it would be better if she did?
>>
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>>62217203
I laughed too hard at this post
>>
>>62217332
KC is god-tier.

Thanks.
>>
>>62217234
fishing an small business ownership. otherwise i'm not entirely sure what other jobs are in store within the village itself
>>
>>62217313

I thought Fes was supposed to have an awesome old town and souks etc?
>>
>>62217399
you have to go back
>>
>>62217124
We have no idea. All politicians who meet with her to discuss government business are Privy Councillors and breaking PC confidentiality is treason
>>
Went out to catch some Pokémon today. Headed into town and caught a Venomat, then I popped a lure at the city hall and just chilled for a bit, watching to see if anyone would show up. Like 10 chinks and 4 normals showed up. Turns out the girl who was sitting next to me on the bench was also playing and she noticed the lure popping up as I tapped my phone, so we ended up talking. Then we ended up walking and talking while catching Pokemon. Then we ended up sitting on a small hill overlooking a pond where people were feeding ducks. Sat there for at least 4 hours. It was nice.

I love summer now. I think this whole normie thing might be for me.
>>
>>62217413
FOY
>>
>>62217365
euuugh shut up love.
>>
>>62217429
font
>>
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>>62217203
>>
>>62217319
i can't think of a single "bad" place in iceland. but i spend very little time in the capital and have no proper experience living there
>>
>>62217400
why does iceland have no trees?
>>
>>62217429

you were never an abnormie in the first place, pretender
>>
tell you what, that crack is really moreish
>>
>>62217429
Did you get her number mate or did you literally just waste the whole day
>>
>>62217430
4ch*n and kc are red tier
go back
>>
>>62217429
didn't shag her?
>>
>>62217382
The Monarch hasn't been involved in Parliament for a long time! I guess because it's seen as not so "free". I think she still has the power to declare war for whatever reason, but that would never happen. Most people I know, generally like the Royals, they don't see them as celebs like some yanks but they have no problem with them.

Personally I think our current constitutional monarch is one of the best ways a country can be run. So I'm fine with it.
>>
it's too damn sunny
>>
>>62217429
I went out and the servers kept crashing and every pokemon i tried catching disappeared before I could click on it, saw some proper rare looking ones too, was absolutely fuming.
>>
>>62217476
I didn't leave my house from the age of 14-20.

>>62217484
Course lad.
>>
>>62217355
Yeah Tangier is fine
Casablanca is really terrible, the people in it are for the most part apes, there are some good people in it of course but its a hub for criminals and I wouldn't go there without an army
I might be biased though a bit because I hate casawis, seriously though as long as you visit a popular tourist destination you'll be fine the security forces in this country put the well being of foreign visitors first because a large percentage of our economy is based around you having a good time and spending your money.
>>
>>62217512
Good lad
>>
>>62217498
They were a bit dodgy today, for sure. Which is why we ended up sitting down on the hill in the first place.
>>
>>62217408
It does but the risk of getting shanked by some bydlo for your wallet is too high
>>
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>>62217473
the climate doesn't allow for much natural growth of trees, it's said the vikings chopped them all when they first arrived. but there are indeed man-planted trees inside the towns and villages, there is a view of hundreds of trees from my house
>>
See her in the gym doing two squats
Tight leggings on she don't do socks
>>
>2016
>not carrying a skeng
>>
A backward, moronic and unwashed farsi shiite imam was teaching a class on shah ismail, known heretic.

”Before the class begins, you must get on your knees and worship shah ismail, the greatest Sultan that the entire islamic world has ever known!”

At this moment, a brave, pious muhajideen who had served 1500 tours of duty and understood the necessity of jihad fi sabil Allah and would give his life for Ibn Taymiyyah stood up and held up a copy of the quran.

”How important is the The Twelve Imams, munafiqun?”

The arrogant persian smirked quite Jewishly and smugly replied “It is the soul of the Islamic faith, you stupid bedouin.”

”Wrong. Everyone knows that the Shahada is the true creed of Allah. If Islam was about The Twelve Imams… then we would all be guilty of shirk by now.”

The persian was visibly shaken, and dropped his chalk and his hummus. He stormed out of the room crying those persian crocodile tears. The same tears shiite cry for the zindiks while they were righteously purged. There is no doubt that at this point our kufr imam wished he had pulled himself up by his turban and become more than just a poorly disguished persian nationalist. He wished so much that he had a bomb to martyr himself, but he himself had made his islamic way of life into a jahilliyah parody of itself!

All the students applauded and accepted wahhabism as the only true version of Islam. The Prophet himself (pbuh) showed up and shed tears on how well preserved his teachings were and how there wasn't even a single person in sight named Ali or Haidar. The Quran was recited several times, and Allah himself showed up and executed Ali and every shiite kufr that ever lived.

The persian lost his tenure and was fired the next day. He died of poop germs in his goat and was tossed into jahannam.

Allah akbar.
P.S. Takbir
>>
>>62217479
*spills out your crunchy nut*
>>
>>62217382
>Does anyone know why she chooses not to?

People like the monarchy, but they don't want them getting involved in government.

That said the PM has weekly meetings with her and she can by convention be consulted on policy, and either encourage or warn the PM on a course of action.

Since it's all secret she could be actually running the country with the Prime Minister as a figurehead, but it's unlikely
>>
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My first job I ever had was working in an arcade during the summer holidays when I was 15, fixing the machines and general stuff like that. I didn't get my growth spurt until quite late so I still had little dainty hands and was only around 5'3 or so, so I was a dab hand at unjamming clogged ticket reels and getting into the electronics without having to take the whole thing apart, and at the end of the day i'd get paid cash in hand. One job that has stuck in my mind was when the punching strength machine wasn't giving out tokens anymore and none of the lights came on, I had to climb up where the ball comes down from and was fiddling around with the electrics board. I heard the typical jeering and laughs of a crowd of drunk lads so I was about to come down out of the machine, then started to panic when I realised I was stuck and couldn't get out the same way I came in. I heard the lads putting money into the machine, not realising I was up there, and at the same time my bollocks fell out the leg of my shorts and dangled through the gap, I heard them shout "right deano you go first" and I was yelling "wait!!" but they couldn't hear me over the obnoxiously loud music playing in the arcade, There must have been about six lads all taking running haymakers on my bollocks while I was screaming in pain, trying to pull my bollocks out of the machine. In fact they swole so large I couldn't get them back through the gap and finally through some smart thinking I was able to get my mobile out of my pocket and phone my manager to come down and stop these lads giving my bollocks a bashing, then he had to get the fire service to cut me out of the machine.
Sterile to this day but the boss gave me an extra 200 quid at the end of the summer
>>
>>62217599
The fuck is a skeng
>>
>>62217621
shank
>>
>>62217375
this much
https://desuarchive.org/int/thread/55354480/#55357265
>>
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>>62217621
>>
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>>62217615
Howling
>>
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>>62217615
>>
All these stories of autists meeting girls because of Pokemon are cute desu. I never meet girls in a cute way like that. When I meet girls it's at a bar or on Tinder or at work or in shops and stuff. I mean I meet loads of girls and shag a lot of them too but it seems so shallow in comparison to what I imagine these Pokemon meets are like. I guess I'm the guy that the girl in that Pokemon situation goes back to shag after spending a nice day with Pokemon autists. I'd quite like to meet someone like that. On a park bench or something
>>
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>>62217615
>>
>>62217621
>>62217634
>>62217666
It's a gun you muppets
>>
>>62217768
no that's a leng you spacker

get your black talk correct mate
>>
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>>62217615
H O W L I N G
>>
>>62217791
>no that's a leng you spacker
A leng isn't a weapon you mong, lenging someone out means knocking them out
>>
>>62217756
> I mean I meet loads of girls and shag a lot of them too

You're on an anonymous chinese autism forum; you don't need to bother lying here m8.
>>
>>62217842
lenging someone != a leng

a leng is a firearm
>>
best endz in london?
>>
>>62217493
>Personally I think our current constitutional monarch is one of the best ways a country can be run. So I'm fine with it.

But if she would be removed there would be no difference so why call it that?

>>62217609
>but they don't want them getting involved in government.

Why?
>>
>>62217873
east
>>
>>62217688
clearly all one person

baka there were way better ones like the astronaut one
>>
>Work tomorrow

Only 42 years left.

(minimum. If pensions exist then; which they won't)
>>
>>62216148
Fucking amazing tb h
>>
>>62217843
It might be difficult to imagine people like me being anything other than a normie lad, but it's true. I'm sure there are lots of guys on here who have shagged a lot of different girls
>>
>>62217842
Never heard that
It's 'lenging a man down' as in shooting them to the floor
>>
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JF here

drinking my first ever Vimto, it's really nice.
>>
skeng and leng don't have concrete meanings desu

i've heard skeng be referred to as a gun and a knife, i've heard leng be referred to as a gun and a knife and hitting someone
>>
>>62217873

bell
>>
I saw a girl that was in rehab center with me today in the bus. I hated her at the time because once when I was sleeping she creeped up on me and started feeling me up. But today she looked nice, well groomed, almost pristine and pure. We chatted up and we told each other what we were doing now etc. Turns out she's perfectly clean while I still use some stuff, but I decided to lie because I thought I would never have to see her again anyway. She said that she is actually in a very fine uni doing quite the studies. I told her my work and she was happy for me because I finished my studies and find a job in it right after. Then she said that I looked more in shape and energetic (which is true I guess) and I thanked her (I didn't really want to compliment her because she went to thin and cute to normal weight and normal). Then she asked for my number and I gave her. I hope she never contact me because I don't want to hang around ex junkies
>>
>>62217882
>Why?

People are thick. They don't want the unelected monarchy controlling our government but arent especially fussed about the unelected House of Lords
>>
>have a dumbphone for 20 years
>battery lasts literally weeks

>get a smartphone
>battery lasts 2 days, tops

not a fan
>>
>>62217908
out
>>
Hey /r/grime senpai. Im super new to the genre and I have a question.

In a ton of songs (Skepta, JME, Stormzy etc) I constantly hear the word 'man'. Man don't care, Man's never been in Marquee when it's shutdown eh?, Man try say he's better than me.

Who the fuck is this guy. My brother thinks it's about JME, but I find it hard to believe everyone is constantly dissing JME. I have no idea. Maybe im paranoid.

Cheers
>>
>>62217883
where la
>>
might try meet a gf with pokemon go
>>
>>62217974
east
>>
>>62217913
amusing post
>>
>police officers shot dead in Baton Rouge

#BlueLivesMatter
>>
Muslims? Nah not a fan.
>>
>>62217974
zone 1
>>
>>62217985
where
>>
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>doesn't do OWO
>>
>>62218022
the fuck is OWO.
>>
>>62217913
amazing post
>>
>>62218019
can't be any more specific than that sorry
>>
>>62217974
Bow E3
>>
well lads, it's been a long time coming but i've finally perfected my time machine. to what end, you ask? kill hitler? stop 9/11? no, no, my naive friend. you see, i intend for my delicate ballsack to be poking out of the soil in the centre of hiroshima on august 6th, 1945.
>>
just busted a load

to asa akira

she looks like a fish

but still gets my rocks off
>>
Lion King or Independence Day
>>
>>62217972
>tfw this is an actual post

fucking hell
>>
>>62217996
>all these recent happenings

worlds getting a bit mad
>>
my brain cells are just a skeleton crew, lads
>>
Autistic general you got here, you twinks.
>>
feel like the world is falling apart
>>
britannai a shit
>>
>>62217957
What did your dumbphone even need a battery for? The screen. Smartphones can do tons of shit why are people complaining about the battery, you have gps, internet and tons of other shit in your hand and you complain it lasts for two days.
>>
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>5 foot 4 inches
>>
hollering at my broads in atlanta
>>
Business idea: steak, chips and mushy peas for dinner
>>
>>62217935
this post needs more ballbusting
>>
>>62218028
oral with/out something
>>
feel my creativity or natural precociousness weren't nurtured enough as a child lads
>>
Alton Sterling was literally a convicted nonce

Any other race but black and people would be saying good fucking riddance
>>
>>62218109

pakis >>>/out/
>>
Business idea: Taper off alcohol
>>
>>62218120
>top 10 shortest adult males in the entire nation of Iceland
>>
>>62218147
Same
>>
>>62218098
It is, but we're on an island so we're safe
>>
what is the most damage you have ever done to your balls lads?

Mine were used as a stunt double in Goodfellas, in replacement of Frank Vincent's during the infamous scene where Billy Batts (played of course by Frank Vincent) reminds Pesci of his previous position as shoe shiner
>>
>>62218181

he'd make a great living as a midget with the big increase in stag dos over there to be fair
>>
>>62218135
>this
i was expecting bull busting. was thoroughly disappointed
>>
Want this motorbike when it comes out lads
>>
Can't find any backpacks I like desu

Gimme recommendations

>black
>high quality
>no ostentatious branding

Up to £200 desu
>>
>>62218226
make sure you get it and use it to run over my bollocks
>>
>>62218197
Let's just say if you had footage of the luthansa germanwings crash you could zoom in on the impact zone and see my bollocks sticking out of the topsoil
>>
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Bollocks is literally hanging on a by a thread lads, starting to turn gangrenous.


Dunno what the fuck Mistress T did to them while I was blindfolded
>>
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is this R tim?
>>
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e
>>
>>62218226
>Motorised fedoras
>>
>>62217941
Perhaps it is easier to be upset about the queen since she is more of public figure.

How are the royals educated? Do they go to uni or are they only homeschooled?
>>
>>62218197

Had a friend accidentally whack my balls really hard with a pillow once. It hurt so bad I had to scream and my voice actually went a bit higher lmao. I also snapped my willy when I fell over with a stiffy which really hurt pretty bad for a while
>>
>>62218304

would love on a go on ole cowtits in the middle xx
>>
>>62218260

how big? i have a north face base camp duffle backpack which is decent
>>
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>getting sectioned because of the state of my balls

I'M NOT MENTAL FUCK OFF FFS
>>
>>62217042
dont think ive ever heard of any terrorist shit from morocco, so you guys
>>
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>>62218226

My bike :3
>>
>>62218324
Expensive private school (Eton usually) then university - or in Harry's case an A-Level in Art and then onto army officer training.
>>
You lads make me wonder what actual bollock torture is like.

Fuck you all.
>>
>>62218347
not too big just for my commute/work really, mmm yeah those look pretty decent.

>raincoat
>lunch
>book
>gym gear
>>
>>62218324
>How are the royals educated? Do they go to uni or are they only homeschooled?
This is a really fucking bone question
>>62217941
>the unelected House of Lords
that exists purely to review legislation and hasn't been able to veto for over a century now?
>>
>>62218397
Sandhurst requires 3 A-levels.
>>
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>>62218038
>>
fuck janni
>>
>>62218421
>and hasn't been able to veto for over a century now?

Except that they can. Like when they blocked the changes to tax credits which led to Osbourne's downfall.

The only things they have no power over are money bills and governance of the House of Commons.
>>
>>62218452
>Sandhurst requires 3 A-levels.
pretty sure it's only two, not sure though. I probably should remember considering I applied last week and was in the OTC for two years but meh
>>
>>62217515

>casawis

i just googled this and got nothing, what are they?
>>
>>62218304
>2/5 English women are qt
>1/5 English women is fat
>2/5 English women look like they were hit by a shovel
WEW
>>
>>62218392
I'd get a grom if I was on a CBT too x
>>
i find testicular trauma quite unpleasant 2bh
>>
>>62218542
about accurate tbf
>>
only 49% Muslim! no majority!

https://www.reddit.com/r/MapPorn/comments/4t9hx7/religion_in_europe_1976x1735/d5fkn3e
>>
Janny just deleted my perfectly valid thread lads
>>
>>62218542
pretty accurate too be fair
>>
>>62218503
>Except that they can
They can't. They can send it back to the commons once and/or delay for a period of two years, but cannot stop legislation from passing. If the Commons wants a law passed, it will pass regardless of what the Lords says.
>>
>>62218515
Mate I am literally a brigadier of the British Army, Highland Regiment I think I should now.
>>
>>62218397
Do any of the royals work with something?

>>62218421
I don't know anything about them so it is reasonable to ask that.
>>
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really wish I was the man on the left
>>
>>62218519
Its what the residents of Casablanca are called in Moroccan arabic, nothing special.

Its actually Casawa but I used casawis since I thought casawa might be too confusing for you
>>
>>62218550

Go for it la. It's just one day of training.
>>
>>62218620
This will surely be the end of Trump's campaign?
>>
>>62218617
>Do any of the royals work with something?
yes. William is an air ambulance pilot, Harry deployed to Afghanistan twice and Andrew served in the Falklands War as a decoy pilot.
>>62218593
I was on Op Derek 15 mate, I don't care what rank you are
>>
>>62218662
I've already got my A2 lad

Another year before I can get my full licence though
>>
why do the police hate the mandem
>>
>>62218693

Lucky cunt. I did my CBT last year, but hoping to do my theory and direct access soon.
>>
>>62218617
>Do any of the royals work with something?

Several are legit military officers. Most conduct public duties for which they're compensated by the Sovereign Grant. Most, especially those outside the top 5 in line to the throne are regular people with regular jobs. Eugenie works for an online auction house or something
>>
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>>62218620

based Mistress T
>>
how could one go about using the movement of the tectonic plates of the earth in order to achieve utter genital ruination?
>>
Do not understand how you could derive any pleasure from getting pain from your bollocks
>>
well
>>
i want some really really fat slag to put both of my balls in her mouth, then stick to them with her teeth and really chew them heavy until nothing is left
>>
>>62218720
Because the mandem commit crimes.
>>
http://www.strawpoll.me/10769319
http://www.strawpoll.me/10769319
http://www.strawpoll.me/10769319
>>
>>62218724
Failed my theory first time and failed my Mod 2 first time as well haha
>>
>But the UK cannot sign any deals while it is still an EU member - and experts warned trade deals take a long time to negotiate.

ah so what's the point? it's too hard we shouldn't bother. we should just let brussels negogiate all those big deals with the faroe islands, kosovo and monaco.
>>
haven't showered in about 4 days haha
>>
Haha you now remember "The Pain Olympics" in which a madman cut his dick and balls off on video
>>
>>62218750
This hurt me mentally mate.. please stop. Don't like all this bollock talk.
>>
>>62218742

alri
>>
why the mandem hating on the bollocks
>>
>>62218776
t. neville chamberlain
>>
>>62218800
It was all fake though.
>>
I wonder what a /brit/ meetup would be like
>>
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Going to coat my bollocks in peanut butter and then stick them through the neighbors letterbox to let their pitbull-staffy cross have a wee word with them
>>
>>62218800

fake you paki
>>
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>>62218837
>>
Caligula’s favorite torture was sawing, which topped another list on this site. The sawblade filleted the spine and spinal cord from crotch down to chest, and the victim was unable to pass out due to excess blood to the brain.He also relished chewing up the testicles of victims, without biting them off, while they were restrained upside down before him.
>>
>checks PJW's twitter

that is one salty dude
>>
>>62218776
>experts warned trade deals take a long time to negotiate.
Shit experts then. Some do take upwards of seven years but bilateral ones with simple give-and-take negotiations often only take around two years.
>>
Post more funny bollocks posts lads
>>
>>62218690
That is cool. Have you ever met a royal? Did the queen really support brexit?

>>62218727
So it is only the top 5 that are important and the rest are just normal upper class?
>>
>>62218800
>Watching that fake shit instead of watching The Pain Men on Balls of Steel powersanding their bollocks
>>
>>62218862
-Listverse
>>
Lads said they were at the park drinking a few beers in the sun (probably also catching pokemon) and invited me to go but couldn't really be arsed
>>
>>62218854
that's pretty much what I was imagining
>>
wish I was like zues chilling in the clouds throwing thunderbolts at things
>>
>>62218837
like this
>>
>>62218865
why should anybody stay calm when wogs are killing white men?
>>
>>62218806

Nevermind the bollocks lads
>>
My belly button smells fucking rancid, no matter how hard I try to clean it. Any tips on keeping it clean?
>>
not condoning the deaths of the feds in america but when you're criminal justice system is that corrupt what do you expect to happen

people were always gonna fight back eventually, the tension's just getting higher and higher. american police system needs a complete reform or this is gonna keep happening unfortunately
>>
>>62218862
I've got a better method of torture - being a 64 inch dwarf on an island of giants
>>
>>62218890
>So it is only the top 5 that are important and the rest are just normal upper class?

Pretty much. Once Charles had a kid, Andrew & Anne stopped mattering, along with their kids. Anne even asked for her kids to not be ranked as Prince/Princess so they'd have no obligation to undertake public duties
>>
>>62218933
pour alcohol into your navel
>>
Remainiacs don't even know why they love the EU so much
>>
my bollocks should be guillotined for war crime haha. I want them to be cut clean and I want to hear the delicate sound as my ballsack flops in the straw basket. Wish my dick could get ripped off by a blonde down syndrome girl. with her mental retardation she would be totally able to get my dick separated from me without bothering much about my screams. She will do it with her mouth too
>>
>>62218899
ONLY PLEBS ACTUALLY THOUGHT A BIG BEARDED SKY WAS HURLING LIGHTNING BOLTS

ZEUS WAS JUST A NAME FOR WHAT LIGHTNING AND STORMS AND ALL THAT SHIT REPRESENTED AND SYMBOLIZED IN THE GREEK CONDSCIOUSNESS; NAMELY THE DIVINE WRATH THAT AWAITED ANYONE WHO WOULD DEFY THE NATURAL ORDER

ENOUGH WITH THIS SHITTY FUCKING "LE GREEKS COULDNT FIGURE IT OUT THEY ACTUSLLY TUOUGHT IT WAS AN OLD MAN IN THE SKY XDDDDDDD" MIDDLE SCHOOL MEME. HOW FUCKING AUTISTIC ARE YOU THAT YOU THINK THE GREEK PANTHEON WAS BELIEVED TO ACTUALLY CAUSE EARTHQAUKES AND SHIT INSTESD OF JUST REALIZING DEITIES WERE JUST PERSONIFICATIONS OF INSCRUTABLE NATURAL FORCES
>>
>>62218835
>>62218851

Pain Olympics originated from the body mod community though. (BMEzine)
>>
>>62218978
>MIDDLE SCHOOL
yank
>>
London meetup when?
>>
>>62218933
How do you guys do this? how do you smell your belly button?
>>
>>62219016
rub it a little and sniff your finger
>>
>>62218968
A unified European States would be more powerful than the United States. It is simply a lust for Europe to be relevant as a superpower again.
>>
Wolverhampton call centre meetup when?
>>
>>62219007
you mean primary school
>>
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https://twitter.com/Holbornlolz/status/754657396564328448

turks in germany purging coup supporters

seems like germany needs some roach spray
>>
Most of the mandem rep the postcode
But I don't know why we like the postcode
>>
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>>62218806
>Don't like all this bollock talk.
>>
>>62219031
>implying "Europe" was ever a united superpower, not just a series of different kingdoms/empires all squabbling amongst one another and vying for dominance
>>
>>62219008
whats the best endz in london
>>
Important poll

http://www.strawpoll.me/10769385
http://www.strawpoll.me/10769385
http://www.strawpoll.me/10769385
http://www.strawpoll.me/10769385
>>
>>62219029
Can't really smell anything like what >>62218933 described, is he a paki?
>>
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>>62218968
>Remainiacs
>>
Is working in a call centre as depressing as I imagine it to be?
>>
>>62219097
probably
>>
>>62219088
I never said that you retarded Boong
>>
So we can all agree BLM is a terrorist organization now they've killed more police officers?
>>
>>62219079
pssh, weak kicks
>>
jeremih might pull up on yo ass
errday yo birthday i birthday sex with you
i ain't tryna test you girl i'm tryna be sexual
i'm just tryna kick it and lay back and get flexible
>>
>>62219096
Why was I not included?
>>
>>62219101

this bird does
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UgNcVPObcww
>>
>>62219145
>organization
fuck off yank
>>
If Simba is the Prince, why did the wildebeest stampede over him?

Surely they'd reconise him and stop. I'd hate to be the cunt who trampled the crown prince to death
>>
>>62219097

yes
>>
>>62219101
Not joking I literally (literally) used to coldcall selling funeral insurance

It was fucking grim, wouldn't recommend it to anyone
>>
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>>62218935
>he believed the corruption meme
>>
>>62219162
You're not a regular mate, if you're still here in a few days, I'll include you in the next one.
>>
weew those benzos had a right kick to them
>>
>>62219184
he wanted to get his bollocks crushed
>>
>countries lining up to negotiate deals with us

but but we're an irrelevant nation we need the EU to hold our hands
>>
>>62219095
South for sure.

West = Boring af unless you're a literal billionaire
North = Nothing of value
East = Essex mob + played out 'Time Out' areas full of shit bars and 'pop up' street food things

>>62219173
Why?
>>
>>62219145
they're too disjointed to be considered a terrorist organisation desu
the actual movement is about equality and trying to spread a message that black lives matter as much as other lives, and pushes for the reform of a clearly corrupt american police system, but it's so disjointed and that leads to ghetto hoodrats taking advantage of this and being anti-white and anti-police.
>>
Only languages you should ever consider learning are European ones, all others sound like absolute shite.
>>
>>62219139
Yes you did you stupid faggot

>It is simply a lust for Europe to be relevant as a superpower again
>as a superpower
>again
>>
>>62219220
Good lad
>>
>>62218935
america has comparatively low corruption

not as low as UK or here but still fairly low
>>
>>62219260
>>62219260
>>62219260
>>62219260
>>
>>62219217
i'm black and lived in america briefly. never committed a crime

the police there will treat you like shit because they can
>>
>>62219267

arabic and chinese are the most disgusting sounding imo
>>
>>62219292
>desuarchive

whoops
>>
>>62219269
I didn't say United European State as a superpower though did I? I said Europe perse
>>
>>62219287
police there are still fucked
>>
>go to high school with qt cheerleader friend
>have crush on her
>watch her dance at the big game
>teenageloveyousobad.gif
>she starts dating asshole jock
>i confess my feelings to her one night after a party
>our friendship is on the rocks!!!
>big dance is coming up and im just hanging out with my nerd friends
>she starts to realize she misses talking to me
>on the night of the dance the jock starts being a douche' and bulling people and she calls him an asshole
>she leaves the dance and comes to my house with an american flag on the front lawn
>"anon i love you more than that stupid jock"
>i look out the window and clap
>she runs up the stairs
>we slow dance and makes love but it doesn't feel that good because of circumcision
>"anon you are the most perfect anon out of all the anons and i will love you forever"
>*LOUD AS FUCK CHURCHBELLS*
>*BONG BONG BONG*
>*FOGGY FROSTY AND GREY OUTSIDE*
>Slags walk past drinking bottles of wkd at 2pm on a tuesday
>I will always be a Britbong
>>
>>62219253
#BlackLivesOnlyMatter when one is killed by a white police officer
They don't give a fuck about black lives being killed in astronomical figures at the hands of other blacks.
Their biggest problem is that they refuse to admit the problems within their communities. And I'm not saying blacks are killing each other BECAUSE they are black, by the way.

They have this idea that police officers are casually driving around and then when they see a black person they're like "Look, a black. Let's kill him!!" and that idea is only perpetuated by the media
>>
>>62219357
did she crush ur bollocks
>>
>>62219357
>high school
yank
>>
>>62219373
>They have this idea that police officers are casually driving around and then when they see a black person they're like "Look, a black. Let's kill him!!" and that idea is only perpetuated by the media

This made me howl and I don't know why.
>>
>>62219396
its a poorthener thing lad, they think grammar schools are fee-paying as well
>>
>>62219301
off you go non brit
>>62112870
>>
so have any of you watched 3d porn using that google cardboard thing
>>
File: eyjafjallajokul.jpg (247KB, 1920x1200px) Image search: [Google] [Yandex] [Bing]
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At the day of our doom, when the sirens wail, windows closed and respirators don our faces. In the suffocating smoke of Katla's maw, i wil be fishing for splatters of magma with my pendulus testicles, the sweat of my balls evaporating in the searing heat and my hairs singed. I await the rarest of scrotal pleasure
>>
>>62219327
The point is Europe as a continent has never been a superpower. If you want to toss your sovereignty away and allow some unaccountable globalist bureaucracy to make your laws, then so be it, but don't act as if there was some heyday in which Europe ruled the world as a united force similar to the USA.
>>
>>62218958
Which royal families are your royal family best friends with? Do they like the Swedish one?
>>
Oh, look, ANOTHER one

https://twitter.com/pzf/status/754735367895613440

I guess those hacked messages weren't fake. This "summer of chaos" really was planned by blm
>>
>>62219373
because the movement itself is centred on police brutality, there are plenty of other local organisations working on the shit you mentioned. but blm isn't focused on black on black violence it's focused on calling for a reform of the criminal justice system
>>
sunbathing and /brit/posting for £7.40 ph atm lads
>>
>>62219357
>go to high school with qt cheerleader friend
>have crush on her
>watch her dance at the big game
>teenageloveyousobad.gif
>she starts dating asshole jock
>i confess my feelings to her one night after a party
>our friendship is on the rocks!!!
>big dance is coming up and im just hanging out with my nerd friends
>she starts to realize she misses talking to me
>on the night of the dance the jock starts being a douche' and bulling people and she calls him an asshole
>she leaves the dance and comes to my house with an american flag on the front lawn
>"anon i love you more than that stupid jock"
>i look out the window and clap
>she runs up the stairs
>we slow dance and makes love but it doesn't feel that good because of circumcision
>"anon you are the most perfect anon out of all the anons and i will love you forever"
>*LOUD AS FUCK CHURCHBELLS*
>*BONG BONG BONG*
>I am on a hospital bed
>doctor looking down on me
>Anon the testical removal surgury was sucess
>hands me a bag with both my bollocks in
>i "accidentally" drop them on the floor and step on them
>>
>>62219471
Jesus fucking christ, abolition was a mistake
>>
>>62219464
>Europe as a continent has never been a superpower.
No continent has, It's impossible. But most Euro countries have been superpowers by themselves.
>>
>>62219464
>Australian reading comprehension
>>
>>62219469
All the Euro royal families are related anyway. Spain & Sweden seem good relations.

Also: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Royal_Victorian_Chain#List_of_living_recipients_of_the_Royal_Victorian_Chain

This is basically the Queen's way of giving other royals a fist bump
>>
>>62219518
>most
woah there tiger
>>
just opened my third bollock lads
>>
Do moles spread?
>>
>>62219471
haha thanks obongo
>>
>>62219483
>but blm isn't focused on black on black violence it's focused on calling for a reform of the criminal justice system
Then why are they specifically on about black lives? If it were just the criminal justice system then fair enough, but I haven't seen any evidence of this, which, by the way, I completely agree that police in America are too militarised and brutal
>>
>>62219518
Exactly, which was my original objection.
>>
Molly's gonna lose his fucking NUT after these latest shootings
>>
https://twitter.com/WilliamShatner/status/754345543606738944
>>
>>62219464
Listen here you stupid Abo cunt. I am not saying Europe was a united superpower. I am saying that it once was handed the medal of superpower a long time ago in that most of the nations here have been superpowers. I am saying the EU has the potential to bring that medal back, to the continent. I am not saying Europe was one big superpower you melt
>>
i want to cut my bollocks away and insert them in my arse so they can still live in me. or maybe i put one in my arse and eat the other
>>
currently eating a scottish egg
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hEhUP4097JM
>>
http://www.breitbart.com/london/2016/07/06/raped-german-politician-lied-attackers-nationality-stop-racism/

ah yes
>>
>>62219634
based
>>
>>62219681
here's the (You) you wanted, and also the comment about breitbart you were looking for:

>breitbart
>>
>>62219729

Not an argument.
>>
currently eating a kernowek pasty
>>
>>62219543
Rome, Ancient Greece, Monarchy Spain, Napoleonic France, Third Reich was in a way a superpower, Us
>>
>>62219357
reminds me of a response someone made here along the lines of: they were listening to some pleasant down-tempo music or whatever and when they read the '*BONG BONG BONG*' the track finished and The Streets started playing
haha
>>
>>62219785
Soviet Union too
>>
https://youtu.be/UlAvh1GpVKw one of us
>>
>>62219836
Ottomans too.
>>
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>>62219729
>>
why didn't the police stop the shooter with their guns?
>>
why don't you lids make a new thread?
>>
>>62219878
Guns are useless in self defence. It's a meme made up by the NRA to stay relevant
>>
>>62219634
CAN'T IRK THE KIRK!
>>
>>62219878
because it was an ambush you fucking nigger
>>
>>62219902
You part of rira mate?
>>
was making real progress in my ballbuster's anonymous support group but I had a moment of weakness on the way home from work today and I'm fucking ashamed. I was desperate for a piss, so managed to manouver my cock and bollocks out of my trousers and started to go in a 330ml bottle of coke I had lying around in the footwell. However, the bottle starts filling up too quick. Luckily I managed to pull into a layby quickly and jumped out the car, slamming the door shut. Well, in my haste I managed to trap the twins in the door. It was total, euphoric agony.

As I pissed myself in ecstasy and pain I thought back to the words of my priest and case worker, but my animalistic instincts took over, I went into a frenzy. I began slamming the door over and over again, hoping to rekindle the flame in my heart that gave life to my love for having my giblets pulverised. It wasn't enough.

At this point I'm desperate, when I suddenly realise where I am, right next to one of the busiest motorways in the UK, the M6. I popped a stiffy at the thought and waited for a gap in the traffic to cast my family jewels out onto the tarmac. Thankfully years of voluntary work as a sous-chef in return for unlimited access to their pestle & mortar and rolling pins has made my scrot incredibly malleable and elastic, spreading it across the road was no trouble.

After my nutsack had taken a sufficient pounding from the late night trucker crowd I spotted some leakage, mainly from where the staples that were previously holding my boys together had come lose, I didn't think this was a big issue until an OAP-filled minibus aquaplaned across my scrotal discharge and crashed into the side of the motorway. I managed to scrape what was left of my goolies off of the road and get away before the air ambulance arrived, I'm just hoping they can't lift any DNA off of the tyres. I'm pretty sure the M6 is still choc-a-block because of it. I'm fucking wired.
>>
>>62219785
i would say most euro territory at some point has been ruled by a superpower but i do get whatcha mean. just picking out small details

>>62219870
>>62219776
why do you lads always want an argument, just accept ur wrong lmao
>>
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>>62219971
>>
>>62219533
Cool. I wonder because there recently was a royal wedding in Sweden but it seemed a lot of royals did not come and I thought it might have meant something.
>>
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>>62219870

that fucking pic
>>
roooo brown folk sure do have different ideas than i do
>>
>>62219931
I am in fact. Thanks for noticing
>>
>>62219870
Ah yes let me watch an hour of some autistic faggot ramble
>>
Wait, how can the circumferenc eof the earth only be 25,000 miles

My car has more miles on it than that
>>
>>62219869
Well they did turn France into a bitch
>>
>>62220116

FLAT EARTH CONFIRMED
>>
Back again
>>
>>62220116

lol cum
>>
What does 'STUS' mean to you?
>>
cant believe people think the earth is flat its like omg there are hills literally everywhere you idiot
>>
I'm a straight white CIS male
>>
>>62220233
ELET THIS POST YOU FUCKING BIGOT
>>
>>62220233
You sick fuck
>>
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>>62220006
fixed
>>
codeine in my blood senpai
shouts out to the mandem
>>
>>62220233
what a bloody racist
>>
F R E S H

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9MVJ9-blYuE
>>
>>62220080

NOT
>>
>>62220275
>>
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if today is like this then what is tuesday going to be like?
free movement of people with canada when
>>
>>62220283
>>62220283
>>62220283
New
>>
>>62220233
omg can you just like not? ugh
>>
Just had some vegemite on buttered sourdough toast

Can't describe the bliss
>>
>>62220278

Superb post
>>
>>62219965
Remove this and post it next thread
>>
>>62220233
*rolls eyes*
It's 2016 you conceited baby-boomer fuck.
>>
>>62220300
Canada has much hotter summers than us
>>
>>62220331
Sourdough is shite. Worst culinary meme going.
>>
>>62220316
rekt
>>
>>62219533
How important is class in britain now?
>>
Have you chosen a new flag yet?
>>
>>62220349
no that's beggy

if it didn't bang it didn't bang

life goes on

I'm disappointed but I'll use it as a learning experience x
>>
>>62220532
why would may give the porridge niggers another referendum after seeing what just happened to her predecessor?
christ you gooks are dense
>>
>>62220726
ulster
>>
the bear is watching the bear show
>>
>>62217237
Looks depressing

Where's the trees?
>>
>>62219638

>Muh gay medal
Thread replies: 488
Thread images: 55
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