Real mayor of London edition
>>59023459
So Englanders, how do we begin the destruction of London.
>>59023459
Maybe it's because I'm a Londoner, but I love London so
cara
>>59023510
Glass it desu
>>59023436
I think maybe you could, but you'd still have to be pretty confident/alpha. It's much easier for Brits to get laid in America by virtue of accent alone (speaking from experience, for once).
>>59023510
Riot again?
godspeed lad
CHIM CHIMENY CHIM CHIMENY
CHIM CHIM CHEROO
Lads pls
http://www.strawpoll.me/10156577
English breakfast tutorial
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0hqVddkHf7Y
>>59023635
I'll do it if you stop saying lads, alright mate?
>>59023671
what. is. that. fucking. mess.
>>59023756
sorry, dude.
>be normalton
>to to the usual normalton place
>all my normalton friends are there
>we speak of normalton things together
Ahh yes it is good being a normalton
sophie
>>59024006
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jhtSwx7cpTY
Have you ever been taking a shower while alone in the house and felt like something was moving around behind the curtain? Or watching you? Did you look up? Did you catch the very vaguest hint of eyebrows or a tuft of matted, greasy hair above the curtain rod? That’s not a good idea. It doesn’t really like it if you see it. It likes it the most when you’ve got shampoo on your hair, and your eyes are shut tight so your eyes don’t sting. Or even better, when there’s soap and bubbles all over your soft, pink face. It likes that the best, because your eyes are clenched so tight, and even if you did want to open them, like, if you heard a soft scratching against the plastic shower curtain, or a rasping of claws on bathroom tile, or the gentle splatter of drool or cum or… god knows what… well, you wouldn’t open your eyes because it’d burn. Right? Right. Don’t open your eyes. Because if you ever see its face, catch its eyes… Well. It’ll notice.
>>59024092
nice lah
>>59023634
M.E.T.H.O.D Man
Poleaboo is still awake
Waiting for the Amir Khan fight to start
>>59024128
Women can't resist big chimp cock
Who /Loughborough/ here?
KHAN'D
KHAN'D
loogabarooga
>>59023671
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rmieAqTG1wI
>>59024196
that's your name
>>59024199
most of the time they literally can't
get it
rape
>>59024331
ahha !
Just got in lads
>>59024618
you have no idea whats waiting for you get ou
>>59024204
not but am close, Blaby mate.
>notification from tinder
>you can start swiping again
>no matches
Reeeeeeeeeeeeee
do you retards actually use tinder or am i being memed on?
>>59024864
gross
>>59024852
I used to use Myyearbook, not sure if it was a brit thing though before Tinder.
>>59024890
don't think so.
Willies
>>59025674
Why would they kick you for that
Just tape it to the window
>>59025651
he got kicked out this week. hes probably gonna disappear in the next month
*makes america great again*
Lads I'm sweating my balls off and they're predicting 26 degrees tomorrow. Thinking about killing myself tbqh.
>>59025708
good post
only the great suffer
>>59025710
british "summer"
KEK
Still haven't repaired my phone screen lads
There's just bits of screen falling out
>>59025724
then why do I want to die?
haha
>>59025724
sincerely doubt it
we can't all be great
there's big guys and smaller guys
for you
that's how shit works
>>59025739
No one cares about your opinion, prison rape baby.
*swipes right*
Ricky Nelson died on this day some years ago lads
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R12H8QWnwvE
>>59025761
hope your burn tomorrow
oh no hahaha its going to be 26 ahh hahahahahaha oh no I'm gonna melt ahhhhhh too hot to live hahahahaha oh nooooo
>>59025766
>left-handed
the fuck
never forget
>>59025800
Useless cunts, the both of them
>Most flags in this general aren't british
Just like london lmao
>>59025786
Literally me
>>59025786
terrific post
>>59025786
For the UK is too fucking hot. Hell, it's going to be hotter than fucking Benidorm or Costa del Sol.
>>59025766
>feminist
>>59025766
wew lad, this is my weakness
>>59025766
toilet glove tits
leftie
feminist
le trash man maymay
>>59025811
your mum is a general
>>59025811
WAHEYYYYY
>>59025759
What county? (Oh yeah I'm really going to dox you and come sleep with you in your tent) I'm just curious. Also what did you do to your bitch of a mother (all Irish women are bitches) to throw you out mo chara?
>>59025786
You've got Brits moaning like bitches when it gets above 20, and foreigners moan like bitches about how shitty British weather is. The world is generally obsessed with our weather.
>tfw you ran out of art school girls on Tinder and are now stuck with the working class scum
>>59025792
>>59025829
>>59025838
I can work around these things
>>59025836
Judging on my willy's reaction, it is mine too
>it's a BR flag
doing a poo guys
>>59025786
We haven't all acclimatized to our irradiated deserts by throwing sticks away but for some inane reason they come back.
ahaha check this out lads im sitting in weather that you would consider warm!!!! well newsflash: i dont find it warm at all!!! thats right!!!! what you find uncomfortable I find comfortable.... try that one on for size!!!!!!!! hahahaha
>>59025872
unimportant post
>>59025872
what a coincidence me too
>>59025872
Literally me around 20 minutes ago
>>59025863
it's not the fact that she's left handed, it's the fact that she's so uninteresting that she lists it as one of her features
>>59025880
wew
>>59025880
another good post
>>59025859
>implying most art school girls arent working class
holla holla
*throws up but the puke goes back into my mouth as the world is suddenly turned upside down but gravity still goes in the same direction
>>59025877
actually those stick come back because they are shaped to use centrifuge motion and the coriolis effect thus returning from whence they came when thrown
Apperantly its going to be 20 degrees on Thursday
Send help
>>59025880
Enjoy your sunstroke
>>59025707
>hes probably gonna disappear in the next month
how?
Hope westmidslad is having a fun time at eskimo dance x
>>59025880
ABSOLUTE FOOKIN' LEDGE
#LADSONTOUR
>>59025880
I can say the same thing about the cold. 5-7c is normal here.
>>59025913
Pretty sure they're all daddy's girl
>>59025936
good post
>>59025938
it was 22 degrees here today
Shiiieeeeeeet
>>59025938
he's australian
his mind is sunstroked from birth
Yanks out
Do you think she will reply?
Gonna go do a Twilight Zone, lads.
Goodnight.
hahaha get this joke lads
A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, “Why the long face?”
“I was born into servitude, and when I die, my feet will be turned into glue,” replied the horse.
The bartender realized he would not be getting a tip.
>>59025996
good lad
>>59025990
uhhh, no
>>59025983
HON HON HON HON HON HON HON HON HON
>>59025996
kek
>>59025996
you fucked up lad it's café
>>59025996
Kek
>>59025996
AUTISM
U
T
I
S
M
>>59024241
qt patootie
>>59025913
The art school here is literally more elite than Oxbridge.
Guess what that red thing is in my room.
>>59026060
A red LED
>>59025996
not the classic "let me paint you like one of mine french girls (ps: i paint with my willy)"
you had one job senpai
>>59026032
couldnt find the accents so I improvised that bracket bit
Why did the chicken cross the road?
It had been crossing so long it could not remember. As it stopped in the middle to look back, a car sped by, spinning it around. Disoriented, the chicken realized it could no longer tell which way it was going. It stands there still.
>>59026049
yes sir sorry sir
*scurries away*
>>59026081
>like one of mine
hmmmm okay
>>59026060
HAL 9000
why are australians such good posters?
>>59025948
yeah but in britain everyone wears a jumper at all times whereas here we're used to wearing shorts and t-shirts all the time
>>59026060
The sun?
“Knock knock.”
“Who’s there?”
“Knock knock.”
“Who’s there?” Alois asked again, more insistently.
“Knock knock.”
And so it went for years. It wasn’t until his deathbed Alois realized he was on the outside of the door.
>>59026085
I'm sure she'll understand
*breathes down your neck*
hahaha get this right so I see this guy's post and I make a post in the same format but with the opposite view hahahha oh gosh hahaha I've done it!!! hahaha yes I have the opposite position in the argument hahahahaha I've done it lads yeassss
>>59026134
sublime post
>>59025996
FUCKED IT
U
C
K
E
D
I
T
>>59026111
The last time i wore a jumper was primary school, and that was because it was mandatory.
>>59026099
aaah yes
the famous you made a tiny mistake meme
Any other Scotchmen here?
Feels good being Scotch.
>>59025846
She's just hysterical that I drink too much but that was benzo-alcohol research gone wrong/overboard.
I agreed to reduce my intake of alcohol and even do a an educational course. I was actually quite happy and optimistic about this. But she still through me out.
I texted her yesterday and agreed to what she required of me but she still wouldn't let me come back last night.
Even met her today in the pub (where I charged my phone, and she was just hysterical, lamenting on about me and how it affected her and just generally participating in responsibility reduction for my current predicament.
>>59026133
My bollocks on the bottom
Auatralian posters are going mad lads
Heat must be getting to them
>>59026154
ok well a jacket then if you want to be autistic about specific kinds of outerwear
hahaha lads did tell you about the time i fisted myself???? wellp i did!!! look it up!!!!
t. australian above me
6 cartons of soy drink for only £2 cannot believe my luck
>>59026192
i used to experiment with fingering my bum in my early teens and enjoyed it quite a bit but i've gone off it now
>>59026185
Appeal to her emotions, irish mammies dont understand logic or reason la where's the father in all of this
>>59026190
its the cold m8 gonna be 18 tonight fucking cold ay
>>59026060
vape
>>59026201
>250mL per carton
you got jewed lad
>>59026133
VERY impressive
Nutritious too
getting pretty chunky lads
>>59026221
>>59026192
>>59026191
The heat does something to the Aussies heads.. Not sure what though...
>>59025936
Well that's still fucking useless to me if I'm throwing the thing away.
I hardly want to be followed around by a mars bar wrapper.
hahahaha oi lads get this get how superior i am
this weather right???? pffffft...*waves hands* nothing to me my dudes
i could sit in this weather all day my man
what's the matter??? a little hot are you???? *scoffs* well.... that's a shame *i smile smugly*
i could even wear 4 jumpers if i wanted to
>xvideos now have a HTML5 player
brilliant
technology these days eh lads
>tfw you have a feminine penis
>>59026283
good post
>>59026243
You try to find halal soy drink for cheaper
>>59026185
juni?
Why don't they build nice ships like this any more
Pay jizya londoners.
>throw up
>carry on drinking
>don't feel sick anymore
>>59026285
pic?
>>59026319
oho
My eyes are hurting lads... Think it might be this heat, how do the Aussies do it!?
>>59026285
Mine is quite manly and aggressive looking
Would rather have a cute looking one (but still as big as mine is haha)
>>59026292
rather buy local cow milk at 50c a 1L carton desu
its not even that hot t︃bh
hahaha this heat? Yeah it bothers me a lot too!! we are one and the same my british friends!!! Hahaha *fans self as typing* geeeeeeeze louise is it hot!! hahaha so hot *begins melting* ladsss oh no I'm a melttttt hahahah
>>59026352
What you measure, I'm lacking on girth i think.
>>59026350
*runs up with 4 jumpers and a scarf and big russian fur hat*
HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THIS WEATHER???? THIS IS COLD DUDE!!!!!!!! COLD!!!!!!!!!!!! HAHAH are you a SISSY or WHAT? hahahhahaHAHAHAHAHAH
*drinks hot chocolate*
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Mum had to go to hospital for heat stroke today. Thank god we don't live in Australia
>>59026302
No.
>>59026285
cut it to make a pointy end
have a custom armor made
voila
warlike and masculine vaginaspear
>I drink milk out of a cow
>>59026392
thank god
>>59026367
T.Aussieshitposter
>>59026403
2 liters a day
now what cunt?
hark lads i bring news from the barista qt front
>come home after getting el classico #3 on the sides and time on the front and back el haircut-o (took 3 mins tops but thats for another time)
>come home and a shower and durrie with brother #shoutouttolarry
>think to myself "well hmph my dude you better look spick and span if you're going to be graced with her holy excellency's presence
>wear my asic gel lyte 5, black jeans, and ralphie shirt tucked in
>go down to the el cafe de spot
>the non-qt is working and i begrudgingly order 1 mocha and 1 flat white with 1 sugar (my brother and mine respectively (both are regular))
>suddenly the qt starts talking to me
>you're looking nice :~)
>on the spot lie and make up a porky about how we're going to mother's day dinner at yum cha or something
>she talks about how its a bit quiet at this very moment
>i look around at how obviously full it is and make a joke about how "it looks like a ghost town"
>she gives me both my coffees
>ask if i need a tray
>i say no
>>59026424
oho
>>59026391
That "heat" stroke was exhaustion from me willying her up the fanny.
>>59026319
aha what an original and creative post +20 meme points to you my dear boy
>>59026313
because of a hundred years of naval advancements mate
bloody non question reevaluate mate
>>59026382
do you pass the toilet paper roll test
>>59026387
*tries to move*
*realise it's so hot I've melted*
*am now a puddle*
hahaha don't step in me it's so hott!!!!!!!!
>>59026387
Fuck off cunt and let me kip, it already hard enough with this blisteting heat *wipes sweat from brow *
>>59026159
>tiny mistake
think you fucked it all up lad
>>59026465
Except the size of loo rolls varies...
>>59026480
corr mate you missed a blotch
*licks the sweat running down your face*
all good :)
>>59026486
haven't tried enough to answer that
how many people here are completely sober and just up at 4am for some reason? you people have something wrong with tyoy
>>59026504
It wasn't a question you french fuck
*farts into microphone*
That's what australians sound like
>>59026483
really hope the world with forgive me one day :^]
>>59026532
*eats the microphone*
that's what americans diet like
>>59026532
*decks you out cold like the insignifcant little insect you are* say goodnight
>>59026529
you can answer things other than questions
>>59026426
farts POO POO STINKY!!!!!!1!
heee hee does little poopie SHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAAHAAHHAAH
POOP!!!! AHEHEHEHEHHEHEHAHAHAHAA
FUNNY CUNNY POOPY STINKY!1!!1!1!!!!!!!!!
>>59026554
*G'night
>>59026579
waffle head?
not rofl'ing mate
>>59026510
really wish i was drunk off my tits desu
>>59026589
fucks sake lads family is about to get here for mamma day lunch and i havent wrapped mams present hahahahaha fucking hell
*poops*
newfags can't blankpost
newfags can't t︃bhpost
ah yes it's a /workonsunday/ day very good
fuck life my dus
*fucks anzu's creamy little slav pussy*
>>59026666
>59026666
nice digits
>>59026639
wrapping presents is bullshit tbqh how do people make them look so nice i just cover that shit in wrapping paper and tape
>>59026716
she actually had a fairly rough head on her shoulders without all that cake
>>59026744
has* lmfao :D
>>59026666
checked
>>59026744
>rough head
redpill me on this straya meme
>>59026778
it means her head is shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit lmfao :D
>>59026639
Stop being a lazy cunt, don't disappoint ya mum on motherday.
Just orchestrated a wank
>>59026790
she's pretty qt without the icing
stupid cosplaying slut kind of qt
>>59026744
i want to pump my seed into her
any lad want to join a /brit/ skype call that is currently ongoing?
>>59026825
haha yeah lmfao :D
>>59026825
Are we on cams?
>tfw you're legitimately worried your willy is too big for a proper blowjob
DUDE
>>59026854
not but we can be bby
>>59026870
Girl told me I was the biggest willy she ever had and said she was gonna challenge herself to deep throat it all
Fuck I want to sleep with her again, she was great
>>59026870
i could use a bit of yours tbph lad
my dick looks like a small banana
only upside is that it doesn't become black and rotten after five days
>>59026825
Is FAT CAM
----A
----T
----C
----A
----M in it?
>>59026910
Trinity
>>59026910
yes
>>59026825
add 'abitofaletdown'
>>59026797
just wrapped it dw
>>59026737
mine looks so awful tbqh the only paper i could find is this really expensive paper that is as thick as fucking kevlar so it looks just so ugly hahahaha
>>59026510
caffeine from last night fucked my sleeping pattern up haha
unironically won't fall asleep until 6
at least im not homeless
>>59026952
welcome to the last two months for me lad
>>59026510
Yeah my sleeping pattern is fucked, will probably start drifting off soon though
Gonna get up at like 12 and take a modafinil to try fix it whilst still staying awake
>>59026939
What'd you get her? Dildo?
>>59026938
parents nickname for you?
>>59026994
yeah haha "nickname" haha ha
No I have the biggest cock of /brit/
>>59026988
nah got her $100 worth of tea hahaha
i dont want to outsource jamal
>>59027003
Going to post mine one day, it will beat yours
>>59027003
feeling small
haha no one is adding me on skype
>>59027003
>the average penis size is actually closer to this tiny thing than your monster
>>59026938
https://join.skype.com/hltZzxeEsPC0
>>59027003
unironically had to reduce the picture because my dick was hardening at an alarming speed
I'm 6.3inch
>>59027003
man my dicks almsot as big as this, i feel pretty good right now
~PUNISHED PRINCESS~
a fallen waifu
>>59027057
Bit gay mate..
birdcucks are at it again lads
>>59027059
only lad? hahahaha
>>59027041
SMALL YANK WILLIES
haha all these dicks remind of the time my family farm caught fire and all my cherished animals perished
still hear their screams haha
>>59027106
Shoot them lad
>>59027093
you don't say
might wank to his cock before going to bed
>>59027106
cheep cheep hahaha jks
>>59027028
bit of a let down then eh?
is it gay to want a hairy man with a beard to destroy your slutty little virgin ass
>>59027184
nah it's just a bit trans
>Congratulations you did it, you broke free
>You're just a fish, like the rest of humanity
>>59027184
>with a beard
yup
totally gay
