Post some cringe stories /vp/
>>26746641
holy shit but i think it might be fake because of the whole asperger thing
>>26746663
I was there for this. The guy told more aspie stories from his life that weren't related to mons.
>>26746641
Kek
>>26746615
There was this one time I was on /vp/. Some guy was asking other people to post stories about cringeworthy events in Pokemon. His OP image was Charizard's Smash Bros model rigged onto Donkey Kong. The guy was most definitely a fag.
>>26746707
He is most definitely the biggest faggot on this board
>2010, 17 years old
>Playing Pokemon Emerald in class
>Guy next to me looks over
>"Oh wow, you like Pokemon?"
>Say yes, start a conversation
>"I would love to draw your favorite legendary for you"
>Favorite legendary is Mewtwo
>Hand him notebook and keep playing
>Bell rings, he hands me back the notebook facing down
>"Sorry that I didn't finish all the way anon, I hope that you like it"
>Flip it over
>Sketchy picture of Mewtwo jerking off and spraying cum all over his own face
>Next day he comes up to me
>"Did you like it anon?"
>"H-haha, yeah, thanks."
>Awkwardly avert his gaze for the rest of the day (we had three classes together)
>Next day, aspiemon comes up to me with a grin on his face, holding a few papers
>"Could you read through these and sign, please?"
>Think it's homework for one of his classes, begin to read
>"Document of consent to have sex and a relationship with aspiemon"
>He had printed out some sort of contract to have sex
>"Sign down at the bottom and we can go to my house later today. We can play Pokemon, too."
>Drop papers
>Leave
>Never speak to aspiemon again
>>26746911
this is on par with OHMYGODKILL
>>26746615
Why would you start out with this?
>>26746951
>>26746951
Its simple, on point, and brief.
>>26746948
He ran the gaming club at my high school. From what I know, he would apparently never play games and instead yell at the attendees for an hour in a fit of aspie/downsie rage.
>Like drawing
>Get a friend asking if I can draw Serperior
>Knock that out
>Thumbs up from friend
>ask if I could draw Serviper eating a ratatat
>...sure? I guess?
>Slowly have them drag me into their vore hell
>Shows my work off to friends who are into that
>All start asking about my personal vore taste
>oneofusoneofus
>>26746911
Found a picture of Aspiemon.
Reshiraam
>>26747024
JustinRPG and Chris chan are the found fathers of this century.
>>26747020
>"Hey there, Youtubers!"
>>26747020
a twitch streamer who goes by masterfrylock13 , probably gonna message him later to fuck with
>>26746911
>>26746707
Holy shit dude, I remember that.
>>26746911
>not giving him a Sucker Punch before running off
What a chicken.
>>26747091
>touching him in any way, shape, or form
No thanks
>>26747034
But honestly, I only researched JustinRPG for thirty seconds and i've already seen too much.
>>26747062
Holy shit, yeah, that's him. I heard I wasn't the only girl he presented a "sex contract" to.
>>26747128
L O N D O N
>Being this desperate for replies
Not going bother quoting you, you know who you are
>>26747211
bump
>>26746911
That sounds awfully similar to the OP in the PokeHorror screencap.
>>26747211
Not me (story of aspiemon), if you're thinking that. This thread is going to die, anyways. Not enough good cringe. Pic related to at least give it a little life.
>>26747135
DELETE THIS SIHT ETELED
>>26747247
>>26747247
I was talking about the faggot who posted the rimjob girafarig, who by the way, just started samefagging
>>26747275
I fail to see what the problem here is.
his whole account is cringe
>>26747135
Is there more of this?
>>26746911
>>26747297
>kneetumors.jpg
I laughed but it's disturbingly accurate
>>26747297
>>26747297
>eyes with sclera
every fucking time
>>26747297
>>26747307
This pisses me off so fucking much.
Why, besides the blatantly obvious, does this piss me off so fucking much?
>>26747371
You weren't regularly exposed to this kind of thing during your developing years, and therefore you don't feel the sense of safety some people do by looking at it.
>>26747422
The only time I could ever imagine "this kind of thing" and "safety" being used together in this context would be if "is in no way associated with" was in between
>>26747478
Believe it or not, some people (especially those with autism) find immense comfort in this kind of thing. To a point, however - horrifying fursuits (like the infamous Flareon) will always be horrifying.
>>26746911
http://replay.pokemonshowdown.com/ubers-222978175
>>26747647
kek
>>26747661
i kek'd
>>26747291
Not related, but another Girafarig gif. This one's cute.
>>26747275
I fug that lizard
related. The posts with a dragonite and buneary are the stories i had.
I was just reading bulbapedia entry on Lopunny and it mentioned blackened fur once and "pantyhose" twice, instead of just calling it blackened areas
>>26746641
this reminded me I was autistic as a kid
>>26747869
Nice one :D
>>26746982
But you aren't a murderous psychopath like vorefags are
>>26746911
I hope you're not serious, anon.
Reposting this. Watch the match, then read pic related.
https://replay.pokemonshowdown.com/randombattle-247965078
>>26749383
god damn
>>26746911
>Aspiemon
Can he digivolve? Is he only Rookie level?
>>26746911
>>26746911
Are you shitting me?
>be on /vp/
>look at gardevoir thread
>>26746707
My goodness, I remember that! I felt kinda bad for him, I wonder if he found a better way to spend his time.
> be me, late 90s, eight years old
> really love Pokemon, watch the anime after school, even play TCG with my little bro despite not knowing what the fuck we're doing, etc
> every day at recess a bunch of us LARP as pokemon
> "I'M VAPOREON!!!!"
> get made fun of by the other girls, who have decided vaporeon is an abomination for whatever reason
> stay true to my favorite mon anyway
> get approached by one of the boys who also runs around pretending to be a pokemon like a fuckwad during recess
> "hey anon, you're vaporeon, right?"
> "y-yeah"
> "YEAH THAT'S AWESOME WATER TYPES RULE"
> finally someone understands
> kid tells me that they are gyarados
> we become best friends and refer to each other only as our rightful pokemon names
> nothing eventful happens for awhile, just regular stupid kid stuff
> until one day we were talking about water type moves and water type pokemon in general like we usually do
> gyarados told me he's been learning new moves and he wants to show me
> "ok"
>>26750033
> we go behind the playground/recess area near a shed that was for storage or janitorial shit or something
> he doesn't want anyone to copy his new cool move
> no one around
> "are you ready vaporeon"
> "yeah sure"
> gyarados: *unzips dick*
> never saw a penis before this
> horrified, but trying not to show it
> don't want to insult my only friend
> awkward pause
> "ok vaporeon, you have to close your eyes"
> closes eyes
> he starts rubbing his dick on the back of my hand
> stay still, don't say anything, don't want to look, trying to figure out how the fuck to get out of this situation without destroying our before now awesome friendship
> rub rub rub rub rub
> "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU KIDS DOING"
> i jump from the sudden shouting
> this causes me to jerk my arm up in such a way that basically made me punch gyarados' dick up into his stomach
> gyarados lets out a loud cry
> gyarados falls to the ground in pain while simultaneously cumming on himself
> i am so taken back by all the fuckery that's happening around me, so scared that gyarados was hurt, so scared of how much trouble i knew in, so overwhelmed
> feel lightheaded
> start crying
> go to principal's office
> they call my grandmother and tell her what they saw
> she threw away all of my pokemon cards, banned me from watching the anime, and grounded me for three months (it was about to be summer vacation too)
And that's how Gyarados ruined my life.
>>26750044
Do you still hate Gyarados to this day? That sounds rough.
>>26747128
>girl
For some reason it was funnier imagining you as a guy in the story
>>26750044
>blaming pokemon
Oh yeah, because a kid being a pervert and molesting you is totally a mistake caused by allowing you to enjoy anime and card games. Good parenting indeed.
>>26750044
I didn't know that gyarados can learn bullet seed
>be in college
>Unknowing my asperger condition
>I was deceived to talk with a girl in my class that a guy likes her
>As one symptom of asperger is my inabillity to tell something without the backstory, I said that they forced me to tell while I was on the toilet pissing
>They awkardly looked at me
>The girl never talked to me again (yep, I said this to the whole class)
>>26749873
gardefags are legimitely the worst group of people around.
Take Falcon, Blueman, and the rest of their discord group. When a Garde thread gets posted by anyone but one of their group members they flood the thread so it hits image limit. If they don't make the Garde thread, it can't exist. There have been screenshots where someone asked Falcon, on discord, if he is responsible for flooding the thread and he has admitted to it.
The same group also mass reports any thread where they are made fun of. Hey, guys! Go right ahead and try, this post doesn't break rules. After the GCP11/Blueman cringefest of a few months ago anytime they are brought up with any serious attention they will bombard the thread, report it, and do what they can to get it taken down.
Blueman once claimed that people would forget about him but he has no idea how many screencaps were made because of his and the discord group's autism. Dude is a bad meme now. Haven't seen him namefagging on here since the threads screencaps about him got popular.
>>26749383
gross
>>26747297
idk if you know this anon but those places are basically huge geek orgies, those knee pads are common so your knees don't hurt when you're bent over
>>26750091
Gyarados the person or Gyarados the Pokemon, anon?
>>26750179
She was/is crazy old nutter. She did many other awful and irrational things. My uncle takes care of her now, she has full blown dementia. She tries to give the people on television commercials cash, replies to people on sitcoms, etc.
>>26750249
kek
>>26750395
My greatgrandma was kinda like that, also really old fashioned.Unrelated, she used to miss Mussolini regime.
I also remember when i was like six i had to promise i would have never watched "chinese cartoons, which are so violent"
>be me
>in small pokemon breeding/trading community
>we just chill out while trying to hatch pokemon with decent IVs or shinies
>old member called "hidden zoroark" or some shit like that
>HZ is notorious autismo
>hits on literally every girl with a new story every time
>one day trading with him for a sweet shiny beldum
>he engages small talk
>mostly asks about what it's like being a gamer girl
>somewhat board so I amuse him for a while
>eventually he asks how big my boobs are
>tell him flat because I'm 12
>he believes it despite my voice
>goes on about how much he appreciates young girls getting in to video games
>somehow gets on to talking about how flat chests are best as if i cared about being flat
>starts trying to hint he wants to roleplay with me where i'm a loli or some shit and he's his persona (which is a zoroark, no surprise)
>tell him I actually have giant boobs and I'm 18, and that he was actively trying to engage in pedophilia
>"I WAS JUST JOKING HAHA"
>could practically hear the spaghetti falling out of his pocket
>stuttering and stammering trying to get me to believe he was joking, asks every minute or so "YOU KNOW I WAS JUST JOKING RIGHT"
>eventually finish the trade
>remove him
>laugh about it with group admins
>about 3 months later he gets banned for trying to ERP with some of the group's minors
will pedos ever fucking learn?
>>26750486
Yep yep. Mine was/is also racist and kind of hated the idea of Pokemon from the start because it was Japanese. She was/is also a cherry picking Catholic.
>>26750044
>8 years
>cumming
Fake and gay
>>26750528
> op was 8
> everyone in the story must also be 8
>>26747297
What did he mean by this?
>>26750520
Did he ever create a youtube account called verlisify
>>26750647
Haha that would imply he actually had some form of skill.
He was 25 and lived with his parents, and was legitimately surprised when we spent about a week convincing him that one day he would have to work in order to support himself.
This guy was such a fucking waste of space it was honestly sickening.
>>26747478
Eh furries are pretty harmless. They're weird and mostly autistic, but harmless.
>>26747869
This is someone's fetish.
I saw a kid wearing cargo shorts and a short sleeve shirt. Is that cringe?
>>26750729
Burn all of them in the suit wihout realisation.
>>26750520
>I'm 18 and I have huge boobs
You know the rules femanon
>>26746911
>Favorite legendary is Mewtwo
Haha, CRINGE
>>26750833show me yours i'll show you mine
>>26750520
That's nice shit. You got him.
/hypno/
The fact this shit worked and made me have a spell of furry related activities for a few months before I realised how fucking ridiculous this is.
>>26750520
This isn't Pokemon related but this story reminded me a lot of pic related
>>26750520
Eugh.
This was years ago, cant remember my age then, so some details may be lacking, but I'll tell it the best I can
>in grade school
>pokemon cards are the shit
>I like them since they're the shit, but I didn't get into pokemon until I was 17
>everyone circlejerking and trading when suddenly
>"HEY, YOU HAVE AN ANCIENT MEW CARD, I WANT IT"
>no fucking way he's getting that
>'Im not gonna trade it"
>this gets the kid suddenly irrational and emotional
>"I WANT IT I WANT IT I WANT IT I WANT IT I WANT IT EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEIEEEEIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEIE"
>bell rings, start walking to class
>"ILL GIVE YOU ALL MY CARDS, PLEAAAASEEEEEEE"
>ignore him at this point
>"AHHHHH WHYY EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE"
>fast forward a month later
>beyblades are the shit
>playing with come kids, suddenly mew guy comes by
>"wow that really stupid its a pokemon rip off"
>'please go'
>"TRATTORIAS YOUR TRATERRRRRRRRRRRRSS AEEEEIIIIIIIIEEEE."
>Fast forward again to college
>buddy of mine introduces me to /vp/, it aint the hell hole I thought 4chan was
>thread up with the same mew card picture, tell him the story
>turns out he was the same kid, he wasn't medicated at the time, couldn't control himself
>"You still have that mew card, uh right?"
>'Sorry, I gave them all away after I got out of it'
>A flicker of ancient tard rage flashes through his eyes before quickly dissipating, a reminder of the past.
>>26751003
These people deserve execution
>>26751042
>Not keeping your ancient mew card
>>26751003
This is what happens when you dub 10 year olds with adult voices.
>>26751003
Pedos are honestly the most disgusting type of human being.
>>26750520
Oh god that reminds me of something that happened to someone in our chat group a few years back
>be member of VERY small Rizon chat group (15 people at most), mostly cyberpunk fans and casual gamers, pretty laid back environment
>new guy shows up
>asks if we play Pokemon and wants to exchange friend codes
>I'm an antisocial faggot who hates having friends so I politely decline and say I don't have a code
>one of the girls in our group gives him her friend code
>she's the youngest, around 15 or 16 and has schizoaffective traits (she was very nice but was easily stressed out; nothing too autistic)
>after a couple of weeks new guy starts flirting with her
>we find a site with his info and he's like some 35 year old German guy
>admin of the group warns him to knock it off
>dude throws a fucking bitch-fit of enormous proportions, cussed out all the mods
>b&
>girl disappears from chat
>after a month or so admin's worry
>track her down and find out she's dating the guy but wants out
>guy is like stalking her profiles and constantly contacting her
>threatens to kill himself if she leaves, the usual
>really affecting her mental health adversely
>flunks out of all her classes, goes on an extended leave of absence
>find this guy's own IRC group; filled with braindead alt-right dudes who are quite literally the dumbest people I've ever spoken to (one of them was going on and on about chemtrails, for example)
>next day one of the admin's imageboards they ran spammed with links to CP
>this guy brags about it in the IRC group like a retard
>consider reporting him to like, the FBI
>girl says we can't because he's been paying her medical for the last six months at this point
>what
>eventually get her to block him everywhere
>next day all her personal information is posted all over /b/
>never hear from either of them again
Pokémon sometimes connects you to people you'd rather not meet.
>>26751283
>Rizon groups
boy that takes me back
>>26751283
So wait, your group tracked down the guy by name, age, and ethnicity?
Had evidence of him being in posession of CP as well as evidence of him exploiting a minor (who knows what happened behind the scenes) and doxing her?
Did no-one even think of trying to get back at him?
>>26751283
I want out of the sekrit club
>>26751359
I think one of our group members reported him to be honest. We didn't have his real name, though. We found I think his Twitter account or something that mentioned he was turning 35 and had his location as Germany. We also found his Rizon group and iirc a reddit account. It's been like four years, my memory's hazy about the details.
>>26751395
He could be almost 40 by this point
Still roaming random IRCs fishing for little girls and exploiting them
We need Chris Hansen
>>26751441I'm Chris Hansen with Dateline NBC and we're doing a story on adults who try to meet kids online for sex. Now, if there's anything else you'd like to tell us, we'd be more than happy to hear it. Otherwise, you're free to walk out of that door.
>>26751441
Yeah, it's tough because you can easily change your name, have a VPN going and evade detection on IRC. I don't think anyone kept the chatlogs where he said he posted CP, either. I know I don't have them. Unless one of our 15 members was an NSA guy who really loves serial experiments lain I think we're SOL on locating him again if he didn't get v& during his disappearance.
>>26751475
Ehhh I'd go out on a whim and say that if he was paying for any medical treatments then there'd most likely be a paper trail back to him. Money tends be very easy to track, so if he did dox her then I'd hedge a bet it very quickly came around and bit him in the ass.
Could explain the disappearance.
>Used to draw pokemon and neopets during class.
>In 9th grade.
>One time a teacher was looking through my binder for something and came across my drawing of a Gelert (pic related) in a flame shirt.
>I quickly grab it away.
>Awkward pause.
>"I like to doodle too."
I grew up way too late. Wait. I'm posting in a pokemon board, so I guess I still haven't, completely.
>>26750044
> gyarados falls to the ground in pain while simultaneously cumming on himself
holy fucking shit
>>26746707
>decide to looking up more
>tfw
>>26746641
Is the thread still in the archive?
Baby's first day on /vp/ isn't go too well.
>>26752338
>>26752771
Thread died. 1/2
>>26752829
Hi tails.
It's ironic you're here posting in a crime thread about others.
>>26752829
Sure is summer in there. 2/2
>>26752829
tripfags are all hilariously stupid
you ever visit /g/? place is full of them
>>26752842
>Doesn't like furry pedo scat porn spam in a blue board in unrelated threads
HAHA HAHA SUMMER AMIRITE
>>26752841
>being this ass blasted your off-topic autism thread didn't pick up
For the second time in a row the autism/cringe thread gets meta.
Keep posting, tripfag. People will keep your autism alive through screen caps.
>>26752858
>>26752869
I had no idea we had so many furries here.
>>26752841
>>26752856
You do realize what you're doing is autisticaly stupid, regardless of yor motivations/alignments in this "war" of yours, right? You've got to be trolling
>>26752896
>people that don't care must be furries
Holy shit is this another Barneyfag
>>26752899
Are you saying you like tails?
>>26752921
I think the joke is how seriously you take your 4chan boards
absolutely shameful
>>26752921
I don't, at all, but I'm not stupid like you. Do you honestly think tripfagging against a massless group of retards will stop people from posting scat porn?
>>26752948
I'm just tired of having to look at furry kids eating each others' shit every fucking day.
>>26752842
>Image.jpg
>It sure is summer in here
>>26752981
Then report quietly and move on, autist, you're more likely to get yourself banned drawing attention to yourself for no reason like this
>>26752981
Boohoo my feelings aren't taken into consideration.
>>>/tumblr/
>>26752981
>hurr durr I'm a retarded gay tripfag that doesn't know how to filter images or even not fucking click on them
>>26752981
That just means you're browsing pokefilic/furry threads anon, so you have no moral ground to stand on
>>26753007
only furries would adopt a tripcode for this shit
>>26753007
The thread he started tripfagging in was pokegirl X Pokemon cropped porn thread.
>>26752996
Reporting him has done absolutely nothing.
>>26752999
>Boohoo people are against my fetishes
>>26753032
You would have to have been there to know that
>>26753046
>Boohoo people are against my fetishes
That's exactly what you're fucking whining about right now you retard
>>26753046
It was on the first page, dipshit.
Anyone viewing index would have seen it.
>>26753054
Eh, you've got me there.
>>26753046
>Reporting him has done absolutely nothing.
It does hold him off for a while, but he sometimes comes back.
>>26753046
Its obvious you're a pissed off newfag without the simplest grasp on how this works
>>26753077
His posts are always deleted by him first
It's fucking annoying
>>26753095
>>26753069
Consider this; the /trash/ board is easily accessible for your awful pokemon porn needs, you fucking degenerate
Tripfag, you're wasting time in here. Tails is posting in another thread right now. Leave so we can keep making fun of you.
test
This talk of the tailsporter reminded me of the one time there were some waifuthreads up for a couple of days, and he failed to take them down so many times he broke down into full autism and started too spam the board claiming everyone should thank him for making this a better place. Does anyone have screencaps of his crisis?
>>26753160
tldr
>>26753160
Did he really just...?
>>26753172
Looks like we've got 3 barneyfags on our hands
Goodraposter died but now we have this shit
>>26750098
I did too lol.
>>26753181
I think he just did...
Guys stop being mean this guy is right
Also I have a cool name
Follow me on deviantart
>post yfw Tails poster comes in and posts the comic just to spite him
>>26753220
Don't
RIP thread. It was fun while it lasted.
>>26753241
You know what would be greatif that didn't happen
>>26753241
>>26753262Wanna make out
At this point I'm just doing this satirically.
I mean, it's hard to look at this at this point and not think bait.
Tails is still a faggot though.
>>26753292
Though I do admit I started this off quite serious.
Still obvious that screencapper was tails.
Or coincidentally just another iPhone shitposter who supports tails.
>>26747869
BONER NO STOP
>>26753292
>>26753327
>talking to yourself on 4chan
dude...
>>26753339
STOP. It's not even excusable anymore, thats just a fucking giraffe, with a slightly bigger than normal tail. If you want to fuck that, go seek psychiatric advice
>>26753327
Or, they don't support tails and just think a butthurt trip fag was worthy of being capped for the autism thread.
>>26753365
I'm just saying Tails was an iPhone poster, too.
>>26753389
I'm just saying yousmell funny
>>26753389
>/vp/ is one person
Not everyone with an iPhone is Tails. Grow up.
>>26753389
You're saying anyone who disagrees with you is promoting tails. In other words, you're literaly saying "if you're not a furfag like me, you're into furry scat porn like him"
>>26753445
>Furfag
The word is Poképhile
Just because we're both degenerate doesn't mean we're the same thing. And for the record I only go in Pokegirl threads.
Not denying I'm a complete degenerate, though.
>>26753486
go to bed
>>26753486
As if fapping to pokemon fucking humans was any better than fapping to pokemon
>>26753494
That train left the station when I was busy tripfagging.
I think I'll just go lay on the railroads and think about what I've done until the sweet release of death.
>>26751003
Holy shit, I actually remember seeing that once.
>>26753504
No, I only care for the ones that don't involve Pokémon.
I may be degenerate but I'm not a furfag. Probably more degenerate than the average furfag but I still refuse to be one.
Anyways, I have to go an hero.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sEeqxOdatWk
>>26747284
He is literally the worst. It took me 3 videos to figure out he wasn't gonna get less aspie
>>26753546
Not that shit again.
I mean, some fetishes, while appalling, at least I get. Some things are just for certain degenerates. But this....
WAKE ME UP INSIDE
The /po/ group from 420chan got one of the users named Watson to eat a hat over some smogon/pokemon related thing. He just straight up ate a hat on video, which I'm sure still exists somewhere.
>>26753546
What's the appeal of farts again?
>>26752559those aren't even the worse ones, there's ones mapped to Bayonetta, and I believe Ness
>>26753364
>implying it isn't a vorefag instead
Okay guys, found somethingProbably still less degenerate than me
https://youtu.be/M87ciTpcHgA
That white text at the end, though
>>26753668
This guy has more
https://youtu.be/VQJk4GdZWQQ
Also tailsposter thinks he's still relevant
>>26753693
>>26753668
https://youtu.be/wekRp4IWNyo
>>26753668
>>26753693
I haven't seen this sort of shit on youtube in years
>>26753785
Just look up (anything here) fanfic and scroll down for about seven seconds.
https://youtu.be/EjGatozmJlk
To be honest I could barely hear this over the bath I have running and I could only manage to sit through a few seconds of it, but....
What the fuck
>>26746615
http://replay.pokemonshowdown.com/unratedrandombattle-386958740
Not even too cringey, but
>love how this destroys my team, shoutout to showdown for hooking you up
I know I'm a shit player, but holy shit this guy is salty.
What the fuck did I stumble upon when I was looking up....
I mean look at this degenerate
I AM NOT A SEXUAL DEVIANT GODDAMN IT
Seriously though, I have no words.
Just What the fuck
>>26747297
they really are subhuman
>>26753992
>hability
Well now I supposedly have a virus.
Fucking porn sites.
Always full of ads you better not click on.
Anyways, here's something else.
I think it's supposed to be porn.
It just looks like deformed people to me.
>>26754104
What is that? cringe for ants?
>>26754104
>ads
>>26754104
>clicking on ads
>>26754104
I didn't even click on the ad. I clicked on the link to a site on Google.
I swear those viruses are getting more specific with their fake URLs.
When it come to Pokemon cringe, there's only one person who comes to mind, and that person is Robert.
Boy, let me tell you about Robert
>be junior in high school
>kind of a weeb, made friends with all the other weebs in school
>hang out with them at the library
>one morning, before class, we're in the back reading manga on beanbag chairs
>suddenly, someone new approaches the manga shelf
>no one ever approaches the manga shelf
>we look up and see him, Robert, probably the epitome of the "that kid" stereotype
>Unevenly shaved head, thick glasses, acne, baggy gray shirt, EXTREMELY baggy jeans held up with what looked like cord
>he also carries a huge bag everywhere with him, almost like a luggage bag
>since we're all socially retarded, none of us say hello
>he picks up a manga, I think it was Bleach, and starts reading it, not even sitting down
>a few minutes later, "OH YEAH!"
>my first experience with Robert's lack of volume control
>he's reading with a dopey grin
>bell rings, we all get our bags and leave
>turn around
>Robert's still there
>my retarded ass doesn't tell him that the bell rang
>just go off to class
(con't)
>>26752559
hot
>>26750044
holy shit anon
>>26749171
>i was cucked by a landshark dragon from a videogame
>>26754441
>later in the morning, English class rolls around
>I'm seated on the far side next to some empty desks
>see someone new come in
>it's Robert
>he sees me and his face lights up
>"HI, YOU WERE, UH, YOU WERE, UH, READING THE AN-EE-MAY!"
>what?
>all I can say is "u-uh, yeah."
>"COOL I LIKE TO READ IT, DO YOU KNOW HOW TO MAKE IT?"
>"Make it?" I ask, confused.
>he opens his notebook, and the first page is covered entirely in anime eyes
>no noses, mouths, or any other features. Just....eyes
>I can tell they're an anime-esque style, but they're still a little weird
>eyelashes are really spiky, and the pupil has a bunch of white spots, which I guess are supposed to make it look like it's glistening
>every single eye is the exact same, and there's got to be a few dozen on the paper
>being the complete idiot I am, I tell him that I draw it too
>open up my notebook to show him my shitty anime drawings
>"YOU LIKE BOKAMON TOO?"
>kind of embarrassed to be in high school and still liking Pokemon, so the fact that he said it so loud made me want to just bury my face in my backpack
>"THE SHOW IS MY FAVORITE HAHA DO YOU, DO YOU THINK JESSIE IS FUNNY?"
>Tell him quietly that I don't watch the show, I just play the games
>"MY MOM TOOK MY GAME AWAY"
>teacher walks in, thank god
>think that I'm free from this awkward conversation
>right as she starts talking, though, Robert drags me back into autism hell
>"DO YOU LIKE IT WHEN JIGGLYBUFF WAS DOING THE CONCERT AND SHE, AND SHE, AND SHE, AND SHE GOT MAD CAUSE THEY ALL FELL ASLEEB?"
>oh god everyone's staring
>teacher looks over. "Robert, class is starti--"
>"I DREW THESE EYES WHENEVER I WAS WATCHING BOKAMON!"
>he shows me the eyes again, and turns the page
>the back of the paper, nothing but the same eyes, the next page, nothing but the same eyes
>getting a serious "all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy" vibe
>teacher doesn't yell at him because apparently he's special needs
(cont)
>>26747253
That was blatantly ironic shitposting, you fucking idiots.
Just look at [s4s] or eventumblrand you see shit like that all the time.
>>26749873
>filename
It's been like half a year (probably more) since you started posting this shit everywhere, and you're still posting it, which is more cringeful than the pic itself.
>>26746982
my condolences
>>26752841
>>26752856
Holy shit I didn't know that /vp/ has it's own Barneyfag now.
Jesus.
>>26754649
>she places a hand on his shoulder and politely asks him to be quiet
>he looks up at her like he's about to cry
>slams his notebook shut and buries his face in his hands
>only see him in class the next few days, no idea why he was there for such a short time
>but I still saw him around school
There's more Robert stories, but not all of the are Pokemon-related
>>26754755
Keep going anon. I love stories like these
>>26754755
Share some of them anyway.
>>26754731
At some point I started doing it ironically.
If anything that's more cringeworthy itself.
>>26754755
Keep going
I want to hear the cringiest one.
>>26752559
>that unfortunate cutoff
I got a good one
>be me in middle school
>have no friends except a few kids i talk to here and there about cartoons and whatever kids my age at that time liked
>end of class
>spent the whole class looking at my pokemon cards and not caring about the class
>everyone is leaving the classroom
>a few girls are about to leave by the door but one of them stops to see my desk
>all the girls come to my desk and grab my cards
>sweating.exe
>"Wow! those are some very cute pokemon anon!
>"y-yeah"
>they smile at me, leave me alone and go
Girls are fucking weird man
Where do you guys find all the cringey showdown guys? Most people don't say anything to me in battle.
>>26754887
In your mom's basement
>>26754755
share them, I live to hear this stuff
>>26754844
>the cringiest one
Well, might as well go with the only other Pokemon-related incident involving Robert
>morning before class again
>he's sitting in a corner, apparently drawing
>my money's on more anime eyes
>get up from my beanbag chair to put a book away
>"HEY ANON LOOK!"
>Robert bounces up and thrusts his notebook at me
>look at his drawing
>it's....Jessie, or the closest likeness of Jessie that an autistic guy can draw
>I could only tell it was her from the hair, but what stood out to be were her "boobs"
>they were just huge circles drawn on the chest
>with a bunch of what looked like lines or something, almost like stretch marks on the fabric
>guess that most of the drawing was focused on the boobs
>and of course, her eyes were those same anime eyes he'd been obsessively drawing
>I'm utterly speechless
>honestly forget what commentary he gave on the drawing because I was so taken aback. I think it was something along the lines of "what if there was another member of Team Rocket?" He was probably fantasizing about inserting himself into the show
>just nod and smile before walking back
>"OKAY COOL. HEY MAN, TALK TO YOU LATER!"
>he thinks I'm his friend
>he might not have any friends
>feel like shit
>>26750528
>he didn't masturbate at 8
did you only just get boners by 18?
>>26755065
Pedos are the scum of humanity
>>26754649
>JIGGLYBUFF
oh i laff
>>26755211
Yeah, not only did he yell everything he said, but he couldn't make P sounds very well.
>>26754857
>>26752559
>>26746615 here, I have one more story for you (not /vp/ related), and probably the most painful of them all.
>Be sophomore in high school
>Recovering from anorexia, as in 900 calories of sugar free yogurt per day, lowest weight is 88 pounds at 6'0"
>Suddenly, after binging on 5000 calories of pulled pork and peas at midnight, I have a revelation that eating is good
>Going into school, I am eager to binge on all that I can find so that I can become healthy again
>I should mention that people like me have no instinctual ability to draw a line anywhere; excess and deficit are the same thing to me
>However, I have no lunch money, nor excess change, so it is impossible for me to get any food
>I panic, and out of desperation, grab a half-eaten pizza that someone left behind on their lunch table
>I realize that I can try a much greater diversity of foods if I can find leftovers rather than just buy my food like any other plebian
>The next day, I start hovering around the cafeteria waiting for people to leave behind their lunches so I can scavenge them like a buzzard
>I do this with the 7/10-9/10 girls in my class, while making small talk with them
>They awkwardly try to introduce me to their lunch partners, citing me as that "silent, but very sweet and smart kid at the back of my class"
>In more blunt and honest words, "That kid"
>They try to act nice and patient whenever I walk away, just to come back and see if they have any food items they want to conveniently leave behind
>After a few days of this, they just start giving me their leftovers and whatever empty wrappings, plates, and trash they have along with it, with a quick "Hi" and "Thank you"
>I'm pretty sure one of them once gave me a half-eaten sandwich which they hid broken shards of a plastic knife in
>>26755620
>After a while, I become frustrated with people who are throwing away perfectly good leftovers by throwing them in the trash
>Seeking to remedy this, I begin taking the leftovers that are at the top of the trash bin, but only during passing periods, just after the luchers have left but before anybody else can enter the lunchroom
>After "getting away" with this for a few days, I decide to up the ante
>Next day, I bring a garbage bag to school, hidden in my backpack
>Right before the last period ends, I would excuse myself to the bathroom, and head to the cafeteria with my garbage bag
>Because no one is there except janitors, I have no limits
>Start shoving table leftovers into the bag, dig through the trash to find what leftovers aren't covered in soda or condiments, pick up food off of the ground that isn't completely covered in dust
>Do this until trash bag is full, then sprint to the bus before I miss it with trashbag glistening in the sun
>Get on bus with trashbag in my lap, people avert their gazes and nobody asks about it, at one time, a transit intern politely asked me to fill out a survey, which I did happily
>Get home and immediately enter room, opening my bag of mess hall morsels
>Grandparents are visiting and making their traditional food, but it doesn't matter because I have school food in a trash bag
>Shove probably about 10000-15000 calories of half chewed burgers,soggy tacos, and rotten lettuce wraps down my throat in about an hour, crying out of shame only for five minutes
>>26746911
And then everyone clapped.
>>26755639
By the way, I'm actually pic related in >>26746641
, sorry for the error.
>Repeat this process for another few days, start roaming the hallways now for leftovers
>Janitors begin to catch on and start asking why I don't just go to 7/11
>Pretty soon, somebody calls a school administrator, who calls my parents and tells them about the whole thing
>I give a bullshit excuse about not having enough money, trying to arouse pity with my anorexia woes as well
>He lets me go without indictment as long as I don't do it again (I don't)
>I instead eat the leftovers of my family dinners, waking up at two in the morning to eat all the dinner not consumed by my parents and sibling.
>Go to lunchroom next day, group of kids see me and toss a fresh pizza in the trash, saying sarcastically "Oh, I'm so full; I don't think I can eat another bite. It's a shame that no one else will eat it" while his friends are roaring with laughter
>Never go to the highschool lunchroom again, not even for study sessions with other class members
And that's the story of how I went from 40 kilos to 70 in more or less 6-8 weeks.
>>26755620
>>26755639
>>26755652
Are you even human?
>>26755620
>>26755639
>>26755652
That's a bit hot.
>>26755652
God fucking damn my dude what the fuck
>>26755652
>gaining 66 pounds in less than two months
That's kinda hot
>>26755698
>>26755724
Leave.
Does anyone have the link to PokePresident anon's Imgur?
>>26755620
>>26755639
>>26755652
and this is related to Pokémon in what way exactly?no but what the fuck anon
>>26755729
Let me craft a masterful sexual fantasy by spicing this concept up with my trap fetish.
>You will never lock a skinny cute femboy from /vp/ in your basement and feed him with tons of leftovers and fast food trash, which he will gladly gobble and gorge on until he is a borderline-obese chubby trap with a big, round, soft belly and plump manboobs with puffy nipples
>>26755816
Yes!
>>26747128
>girl
Story is just creepy, not funny anymore
>>26755652
>>26755639
>>26755620
ENOUGH
>>26755784
Yes
>>26750738
It's mine
>tfw you will never be a girafarig's tail
>>26746911
He could've made a great friend desu.
>>26753664
Daily reminder that faggot was an underage too.
>>26746641
>>26755652
please tell me this is all a sick joke
>>26753992
>hability
Fucking spics
>>26755620
>>26755639
>>26755652
i am not very good in english, maybe i do not understand this
this man eats trash food? but for why?
>>26756168
aspergs
>>26756180
but why this would happen? asperger means being anti-social, why eat trash???
>>26756267
Nice pasta
>>26756267
