/heem/: slam edition
Images are sometimes not shown due to bandwidth/network limitations. Refreshing the page usually helps.
You are currently reading a thread in /sp/ - Sports
You are currently reading a thread in /sp/ - Sports
Upcoming events:
7/2: ONE FC: Dynasty of Champions - Jadambaa vs Kelly
7/3: Shooto Gig West 18 - Murata vs Kohori
7/7: UFC FN 90 - Dos Anjos vs Alvarez
7/8: TUF 23 Finale - Jedrzejczyk vs Gadelha
7/9: UFC 200 - DC vs Jones 2
7/13: UFC FN 91 - Ferguson vs Chiesa
7/16: Bellator 158 - Daley vs Lima
7/22: Legacy FC 58 - Drysdale vs Spann
7/22: Bellator 159 - Caldwell vs Taimanglo
7/22: Glory 32 - Adamchuk vs Varga
7/23: UFC on Fox 20 - Holm vs Shevchenko
7/24: Pancrase 279 - Ishiwatari vs Brookins
7/29: Invicta FC 18 - Grasso vs Escabel
7/30: UFC 201 - Lawler vs Woodley
8/6: UFC FN 92 - Rodriguez vs Caceres
8/20: UFC 202 - Diaz vs McGregor 2
8/27: UFC on Fox 21 - Pettis vs Oliveira
9/3: UFC FN 93 - Arlovski vs Barnett
9/10: UFC 203 - Miocic vs Overeem
Previous thread: >>68899275
News:
>Bellator wants Rory
http://www.mmafighting.com/2016/6/25/12029734/scott-coker-says-free-agent-rory-macdonald-is-somebody-wed-definitely
>ONE CEO thinks a sale wouldn't help the UFC expand into China http://www.mmafighting.com/2016/6/25/12010028/one-ceo-doesnt-think-potential-sale-means-a-ufc-expansion-to-china market
>Hilson Heis is confident
http://mmajunkie.com/2016/06/ufc-201s-wilson-reis-i-wouldnt-be-surprised-if-i-knock-out-champ-demetrious-johnson
>Sam Alvey vs. Eric Spicely added to UFC Fight Night 91 in South Dakota
http://mmajunkie.com/2016/06/sam-alvey-vs-eric-spicely-added-to-ufc-fight-night-91-in-south-dakota
>>68932032
is he ded?
Schaub Bless
>>68931967
Requesting more cool grappling and posting more
>>68932087
>>68932032
>Sam Alvey fighting a TUF contestant
kek
>>68932087
someone post conor v josé webm
>>68932162
>>68932143
who is fighting in this webm?
>>68932080
>machida shirt
>0 (zero) post-USADA fights
was schaub on tha sauce?
>>68932205
thx, conor bless u
>>68932208
>>68932245
>eric spicely
does he atleast put on spicely angers?
shape
>>68932279
funk I miss Genki
>>68932032
holy shit did his skull get crackd open?
>>68932213
bro, they had to inject stem cells and steroids directly into his chin every day to keep him from dying
>>68932333
Jotkos trip here gets me hard
>no great quality video
>>68932726
>tfw you will never see retro formative UFC again
>>68932981
wMMA exists tho.
>>68932532
>>68933333
wew
>>68933333
man pointing towards the right corner of the screen
>>68933333
>100% wew lad
>>68932726
My boy! Pedro Rizzo!
More webms of his?
>>68933333
Rule Britannia lad
https://youtu.be/BBQXc_xvX7Y
>>68933333
fuckin' witnessed
Why are the Glory commentators so damn awful?
>>68933333
v. nice
>>68933333
>>68933333
I'm not ready for this
>>68933341
>>68933427
>>68933453
>>68933492
>>68933555
>>68933718
>>68933677
Why do Redditors come on here to post about "muh gets"?
>>68933747
>>68933784
thanks for the (you)
>>68933911
>slamming someone on their head
truly a scumbag move
>>68933784
Do they? I didn't realise they did.
>>68933911
>>68934063
>>68934163
>Getting dominated by a manlet
>>68934241
Last grappling based webm need more.
And also going to bed. Night heem.
>>68934319
saenchai is a munster
he won with a point deduction and while not being allowed to use some of the muay thai techniques he traditionally uses
>>68933333
meme magic make it so
posting some good fights from GLORY 31
>Seanchai vs Eddy Nait Slimani
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3l-0P7NRJBA
>Van Roosmalen vs Sittichai
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2rQjJhg1MyI
>Kongolo vs Groenhart
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dL32a8JOyNM
>>68934424
That ref was on his ass the whole time for catching kicks, clinching, and sweeps. Funny that the other guy threw the elbow.
>>68934241
if Zingano doesn't get a title shot after dominating next fight, all is wrong with the world.
>>68934627
>Seanchai
*Saenchai
>>68934627
>good fights
>no heems
pick one
>>68934737
The main event was a LHW heem and it was anticlimactic as fuck.
>>68934875
that was the main event of the prelims m8
the main event was sittichai vs van roosmalen
>>68934922
Misspoke nigga
>>68934665
Dickhead ref, in the replay you could see he caught kick, braced and was ready to throw a strike.
>>68934665
Catching kicks and countering is legal in Glory too.l Just extended holding isnt. The ref was just being a cunt. Though deserve the warning for the takedown.
>Dat cheeky second takedown he let go of early to avoid point deduction
Top kek
>>68934875
>Not being hype for The Black Warrior
>>68932032
Did he die?
Why haven't Petrosyan and Holzken ever fought?
>>68935013
The way he can do so little and effortlessly have opponent sprawling over, is pretty amazing.
>>68935166
different weightclass
Can someone do some Joe Rogan commentary here?
https://i.4cdn.org/sp/1466949033823.webm
I would but my English sucks tbqh
>>68935260
Barely and they share a lot of common opponents.
So is brendon schaub ducking rich piano?
>>68935177
Super rare to see in MMA too. I wonder how he would do in MMA. He is with tristar I think
>>68935274
I would but I have no idea how to put voice clips on webms
>>68935296
They're both ducking previous thread
>>68935296
his name is brandon you casual
Is Cruz /heem/'s collective boy?
>>68935451
Daily reminder that i could easily permaheem you
>>68935519
...is this real
and...is he talkin about jackin it?
>>68935394
He is up there in age, I dunno. It could work if they match him with more striking based fighter and he learns to avoid take-downs. Or do modified rules bout, something like when Crocop went to Pride and fought Wanderlei.
>>68933333
BELIEVE YOU ME
>>68935785
it's real
cruz's twitter is fun
>>68935972
>2016
>still fat shaming
Cruz is no longer my boy
>>68935976
Is Kid Nate the epitome of an alpha male? Smart, educated, handsome, caring and able to beat you up with his bare hands.
>>68936092
>fatty fat fat fat cunt detected
wich gadelha wud u claud
>>68935972
based dom
>>68932347
The blood is actually coming from big dude's nose. Little guy was tagging him up.
>>68935394
>vocaroo
>convert to mp3
>convert webm to avi
>merge them in movie maker
>upload it to tube site
its a lot of work I know
>>68933333
Jesus Fucking Christ
>>68936630
and just happens to be exactly where the guys head is
>>68936742
sorry too much work bout to go to bed
>>68936894
Do you think I would actually lie on the internet?
>>68936264
Who would win?
>>68935972
>>68936894
you can see what looks like a droplet of blood on the end of his nose on multiple occasions and blood on the floor far away from the kid
there's also blood under the kid's head when he moves though
bisping for PM imo
you guys didn't even like my poem
>>68937501
>>68932032
lol what a bitch
>>68937688
Kid's dead. Simple as that. Time to wake up, /heem/
>>68932032
"OH! He's hurt Mike!"
>>68938295
blech
>>68938295
Do you think Jo gives good head?
>>68937688
>>68937501
It's not the blood loss that kills you, it's the sudden stop. Nigga got severe CTE at the very least.
>>68934018
(you)
>>68938432
I can pretty much fucking guarantee that she uses her teeth and thinks it's funny.
what did she mean by this?
>>68938789
self overhyped ugly dyke with potential failed chromosomas pairing refusing to be humble in victory
>>68938980
Horrible ref I think. Late stoppage
>>68939036
Clearly not defending yourself, he should have waved it straight off.
Why do Americans look at a bathroom and think "this is a good place to bang"?
British school toilets are filthy.
>>68939457
it's mostly because there are never any teachers in the student bathrooms
american school bathrooms are filthy too, so the staff never go in there unless they're cleaning them
We use to out on the sports oval furthest part possible away from buildings. So even if a teacher sees the fight, you can still fight for a few minutes before the teacher ran across the oval.
>>68939594
Same. We had a massive field
>>68933333
wew
>>68939457
There's no teachers in there.
Why are British people such massive pussies that they don't know this?
>>68938789
That Miesha had been a cunty-ass cunt to her for the last several months and she didn't give a fuck about being a good winner.
>>68939889
Do American teachers patrol the school fields with shotguns and watch towers?
>>68939457
In my old school the toilets were padlocked and you had to get a teacher to unlock them and stand outside in hall whilst you went. This is because some kid got his head stomped whilst he was knocked out and lying face down in one of those trough urinals that run along the floor. He almost died apparently. Total overreaction by the teachers though, whats a bit of play fighting between us lads, eh?
>>68932032
>that gif
WHEN
>>68940038
No, but they're small enough for a teacher to run across very quickly
There actually were school police officers at my middle school
I remember everyone having to stay in the gym once because some nig nog got expelled and threatened to shoot up the school
Everyone was also searched once because they got some information about someone selling drugs
>>68938789
lmao
Ronda getting heem'd was one of the best things to happen to the sport.
>>68940038
No but they'll hop in with some early stoppage thinking they're herb dean.
>>68940183
>This is because some kid got his head stomped whilst he was knocked out and lying face down in one of those trough urinals that run along the floor.
Did you go to school in Glasgow?
>>68940317
Nope. A kid stabbed a girl in her stomach with a biro one time. It severed her fallopian tube and now she can't have kids. He did it because she took a rabbit from someone's garden on the way to school and put it in her locker for the day. The rabbit died when she was in hospital and was discovered when the lockers starting stinking up the place. They then searched all the lockers just in case there are anymore animals locked away for safe keeping. Pretty cool school
>>68940190
Thats once a month
lads how do i get cheaper tickets for bellator? they are more expensive than the ufc ones were. should i just wait until a couple of days until the event and try to rebuy unsold tickets?
fucking hell feels like lightweight has been frozen for centuries
>>68940511
This is the most British thing I've read since I read the works of Virginia Woolf.
>>68940535
Call up Bjorn Rebeney
these mods lmao
>>68940910
Out walks big fat Hunt
But who gives a fuck
It's all just a stunt
So this card doesn't suck.
McGregor is missing
But now here comes Brock!
His chest tattoo'd up
With a sword-looking cock.
He gets the crowd going
By bouncing his pecs;
While Buffer's announcing,
He grins with a flex.
The first round gets going,
We grimace with dread,
For the part where Hunto
Blasts off Brock's severed head.
But what unfolds so fast
(And before there's contact)
Hunt pretends that he's gassed
And just falls on his back!
"Brock's fists are HUGE Joe,"
Says Goldberg, entranced,
"Look at that combo,
All with strikes so advanced!"
Herb Dean jumps in quick
And as Brock wins the fight,
He squeezes his dick
And we fear for his wife.
Jon Bones Jones:
Unbroken.
The GOAT (and a lock)
D.C.'s words oft spoken:
"I'll deepthroat Jon's cock"
They enter the cage
And the crowd roars;
Excitement.
D.C. can envision his succing indictment.
They meet in the center;
Big John reads the script:
"Fight clean and touch gloves,
Oh, and Jon?
Watch your dick."
The two meet with a clash,
"There's that oblique kick, Joe,
And there's D.C.'s moustache
With a streak, down below."
less than two weeks until the Jon Jones meme is exposed
>>68940535
Well its a special UK event. So tickets may be hard to come by and will probably just go up in price
>>68940948
"It's an interesting fight,"
Rogan starts, (what a douche)
"Reminiscent of Rousey
vs Liz Carmouche.
You know that one figher
Is on the offensive,
Their grip so much tighter,
Training so extensive,
That all that they've dreamt
For the past ninety days
Is they have an attempt
To make champions gay."
D.C. is repeatedly grasping,
Fingers scratch violently.
Jon heatedly gasping,
We watch him scream silently.
No individual cheers
From the crowd heard alone,
We know the end's near;
It's just one constant moan.
"JUST LIKE THAT!" Goldy cries,
And in one fluid motion
Jones pokes D.C.'s eyes
Yet he shows no emotion.
D.C. drops to his knees
And without tying up
Makes it look like a breeze
As he flings off Jon's cup.
And just as he once said
That he grinds (not diminish)
D.C. starts giving head and then
Goes for the finish.
As D.C. wipes his mouth and they put on the belt,
You ask all your buddies how this fight card felt.
They throw in some cash for the pizza and fees,
But those goofs all in unison chirp your TV!
"Where the fuck are the wires?" they ask with disdain,
"You quite clearly possess a slow dim-witted brain."
They go to leave but you stop them
and heem every here,
Your canvas floor off their wee head clatters.
You make your point perfectly clear:
There's only one OP that matters.
>>68940962
>>68934627
>Roosmale vs Sittichai
Wtf was up with those punch stats. I had Sit winning that fight easy, but even the commentators were on leg kick meme's dick.
you typed all of that out and pasted it again in this thread for good measure but still, nobody cares
>>68940999
there are plenty of tickets on official sale still, i dont see the arena being full come fight night
>>68941073
Roosmalen did seem to be landing more punches, but Sittichai won the fight on kicks and knees
>>68940277
I cringe every time I see this gif
>>68941153
I'm going to post it in every single thread from now until 200 bud
>>68941201
It definitely wasn't as wide a gap and the biggest punches were Sitt's uppercuts desu.
>>68941218
and nobody will ever care
>>68941207
>gif
>>68941218
desu i thought it was funny, some of the rhymes are slanted tho
>>68941353
by slanted do you mean the rhythm is off?
>>68940277
I feel like anybody whose ever even watched a fight should be able to throw better punches than that.
>>68941406
I'm just nitpinking, its only like two or three of the rhymes.
Maybe you should all relax before somebody gets heemed, ok?
everyone in this thread could heem me
im probably late in posting this Official UFC Meme Generator but im not addicted to heem
http://itstime.ufc.com/
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f86K6I5mY2Y
"get away, get away", "fucking bitch", "fucking faggot", "fuck, for fuck's sake... bitch, stop, fucking faggot"
Best brother ever. Based ruski.
>>68942731
Ty
>>68942968
Is Artem meme dead? He heemd bretty badly guys in the tuf house. Is he still in ufc?
>tfw haven't been on /heem/ in almost a week
how are you lads doing? excited for all the upcoming fights?
xdddddd
>>68943196
Looks like a fun time. I have the week off so I'll be staying inside, playing games, and watching a lot of the events
>>68943382
UFC Lip Sync Challenge? Are you fucking kidding
>>68943572
>he won't be attending the UFC Lip Sync Challenge
I bet you won't go to the official UFC Pool Party either kek
what a faggot
>>68943382
I got the 7th and 8th off. Should be good.
When will headbutts become legal in MMA? I honestly don't understand why they aren't.
быть ocтopoжeн
>>68943572
fuck u goof, you'd lose a lip sync challenge to Matt Hamill
>>68943917
>666
>>68943917
>>68944027
Be careful.
>When he tells you to be careful, it's because he's got dynamite in his pants, trust me!
Would Khabib be the lowest drawing lightweight champion of all-time?
>>68942968
I keked
>>68943382
>ufc lip sync challenge
wat
Gonna take the girlfriend and her kid to UFC 203 in Cleveland. Can't wait. I'm a huge Overeem mark.
>>68944156
>People think Kabeeber can beat Punished RDA
>>68944251
You make a good point. I am now a #CruzMissileâ„¢
Who remembers UFC on VS?
>>68944423
nice table
>>68943927
I bet he'd kill Sound of Silence.
>>68944423
>that tv
>>68944423
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vJm8wc0eXYg
>>68944698
>>68944668
Let's see yours, poorfags.
>>68944736
>>68944796
What size is that? I have a samsung plasma too. Mine's a 60". Pretty good picture but not as good as my Panasonic's. But it was the only 60" plasma available at the time.
>>68932205
It's easy to knock out guys under 5'6"
>>68944796
first of all, what the fuck bud I can see wires
second of all, my grandmother has that same ceiling fan, congratulations
third
>having a TV smaller than 80"
>>68944924
>lmaobud
lmao
>>68934241
BASED Cat
Am I the only hyped for her next match?
>>68944668
>>68944736
>>68944423
>I own a TV for any reason other than to use as a monitor
>>68944970
Pena's gonna smash her.
>>68944984
>I can't afford cable
>>68940277
BEAUTIFUL
>>68945023
>I waste my money on shows I could get for free on the internet and don't watch anyways
Bruce Lee was an actor with zero (0) pro fights
Why is he hailed as some sort of martial arts icon? He's literally the same as Hulk Hogan or Steven Seagal, a pretender
>>68945066
>spending money on something I got for free means you wasted your money
lmao truly the logic of a fucking 12 year old
>>68945125
>steven seagal pretends
>>68945066
>I'm proud of being a NEET
>>68945221
why did they have to show this 20 times before he fell
>>68945275
because seagal's front kick to the mid section
>>68945125
He is a martial arts icon. His philosophy was the foundation for a lot of early MMA and he inspired entire generations of people to take combat arts up.
>>68945262
>I'm proud of giving cable companies my money so I can have the opportunity to watch shows I don't watch
>>68945125
Segal taught Anderson how to front kick ViTRT
>i only watch onefc for the cute greells
>>68945347
As you get older, you will begin to understand that to poor people, the most important thing in their life is money, whereas for wealthy people, the most important thing in their life is time.
Poor people will willingly give up time in order to gain money, and wealthy people will willingly give up money in order to save time.
You're welcome you poor piece of shit lol
>>68945275
because steven seagal has a legendary front kick which could even knockout a gorilla
here he teaches it to machida
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NYPXV0sCe9M
>>68945413
That was really well said. I've never heard that saying before but it's 100% true.
>>68945347
>He can't afford cable
>He brags about it
Have fun watching your frontrowsports 240 streams m8. Inb4 you Acestream without realizing it's a bot net.
>>68945413
>save time
how does paying money for something you hardly ever use save time
>>68945511
see, the poor person can't even comprehend that spending money can save you time lol
they only think that time gets you more money, not the other way around
>>68945499
Thanks brother, it definitely is 100% true.
Could it be that Rich Piano is DUCKING Sajad Gharibi?
>>68945767
No way that man can make 265. Rich is walking around at about 280 right now. Will make weight the time Heem 1 comes around.
>>68945842
that's exactly what Ronda said about Cyborg when she ducked her, too
>>68945767
is this real
>>68945413
>i covet time and preach how important it is to savour every moment and use it wisely
>i post on 4chan and literally fucking watch TV
>>68945502
>i literally have cable television
>im totally not an idiot
literally might as well have a subscription to loot crate
>>68945974
Yeah, he was the first big guy on game of thrones
>>68945870
Make the weight and Rich will fight anyone god dammit.
>>68945125
Theodore Roosvelt was Bruce Lee before Bruce Lee was born, hell before Ip Mann was potty changed.
He was the captain of his wrestling team at Harvard and president of the boxing club, he was one of the first westerners to learn a new japaense style of wrestling called judo, and he promoted that all American males should get good at every range of combat, from strikes, to grapples, to guns and swords.
Teddy Roosevelt was JKD before Bruce Lee, Teddy Roosevelt was MMA before UFC
He would have been UFC champ if it were around his era, look at him back in his college days after wrestling and boxing practice
>>68946122
you completely misunderstood what I said, which means you're probably poor lol
>>68945974
shoop.
i can tell by the pixels and having seen quite a few shoops in my time.
>>68946190
Rich Piano
is DUCKING
Sajad Gharibi
>>68946203
was he autistic?
>>68946324
Rich Piano AND Sajar Gharibi AND Brendan Schaub AND Francis Ngannou AND Sage Northcutt AND Conor McGregor AND KHABIB AND DC are all ducking the one and only true GOAT, previous thread
kimbo slice literally died to duck khali muscle
>>68946203
Roosevelt was a way bigger phony than Bruce Lee. Literally.
>>68945478
Whenever someone lands a flush fronkick in the UFC, Steven Seagull would call Dana and demand 10% off the winner's purse and a comfy executive position in the company for teaching fighters that technique.
>>68946528
Roosevelt would have rek'd Bruce Lee
I'd put money on him in a fight then a phony movie star.
Roosevelt wins RD1 TKO stoppage
>>68946629
i mean his image was more manufactured than bruce lee's
>>68945478
literally not even the same kick lol
>>68946689
thats the joke you leaf
>>68946450
why is this guy allowed to be posted on here? he is not an mma fighter.
>>68946667
Roosevelt was a historical figure and president with biographers, Bruce Lee was a product of Hollywood/Hong Kong agents trying to promote their asian client in a white jewish film industry.
Hmmm who's more manufactured? sorry Alex Jones Hollywood's hype machine has made Bruce Lee's legacy more of a fable then, harvard scholars historical studies of Roosevelt's
>>68945767
>>68945842
Look at skin difference..
Thin skin = roided to the gills..
>>68946800
history and facts aren't really real even if they come from places like Harvard, who's to believe more when they're all alike, Bruce Lee's legacy is practically the same as Theodore Roosevelt's, you cock suck Roosevelt because he was a president, they teach you the wrong stuff on purpose in history classes.
You have to think for yourself and read between the lines and research on the internet
Roosevelt was a fraud and same with most of America's presidents
The entire system is rigged
>>68939036
>>68939285
Right. Couldn't this be considered an equivalent of tapping to strikes? You're hunched over clutching your stomach and walking away with your back completely turned to you opponent. How is that not enough to call the fight?
>>68938789
God damn I really just loathe everything about Ronda's persona. I'll never forget waking up to the headlines that Holly headkicked her, and then the added joy of watching the fight and finding out that it was a landslide
>>68946831
Rich is as natty as it gets
>>68946939
not mixed martial arts related stop posting him
>>68946960
this is 4chan you cuck
and this is a /heem/ meme
>>68946960
That's not true. Rich trains all the time. Why can't we make posts about dream matches?
>>68946985
EPIC MEME
DREAM MATCH
STAY REK CUK
>>68946960
GOAT
GOAT
GOAT
GOAT
RICH 4 GOAT
P4P NON ROID HEEM
NATTY CHAMP
>>68947014
Are you okay?
>>68947014
are you feeling alright?
>>68947044
Fucking hate fagots who shit on our memes, Rich is an original /heem/ meme
Triggers me so much when cucks report or try to get any post related to him deleted
>>68947070
HNNNNNNNNNGGGG
POST MOAR NATTY PRINCE RICH
>>68946985
What's this choke called? The nuggie clutch?
>>68947078
Stick to the board rules and you'll be OK buddy.
>>68947132
its from pro wrestling
Sgt Slaughter use to do it all the time pre WWF and pre GI JOE
Its litterally called a noogie corkscrew
https://youtu.be/DMiHc92htYA?t=5m16s
Its from catch wrestling
How does this fight go?
>>68946898
based af
>>68947180
Moralfags and whiteknights trying to kill a meme like Rich have to be banned somehow, its like trolling violating the golden rule of 4chan, doing it for the lulz and epic meme making, Every since /fit/ introduce Rich; /heem/'s memes are epic
>>68940277
that half assed upppercut makes me kek everytime
