ITT: We confess autistic things we have done
i jacked off a dog when i was 13
my mom sent me to booattcamp but they sent me back because I poopooed all over the seargent's bed and led everyone on a 15 minute chase while slinging poo at them
Once made a fake mass murder paper that I spread over HS. Was meant as a joke, got out of hand.
I once filled my mouth up to the brim with water and spat it all over the school's Stacy when I was 8
Everyone called me fountain for a while
>>28810293
l want you to do that to me
>>28809888
pissed in bottles more than once
When I was 10 I shit in a paper because I couldn't hold it anymore, I had to hide it in my backpack because my mom was home. I zipped it up so the smell was pretty contained, but the next day I forgot and went to school with it in my bag. As soon as I unzipped it the smell hit the room like an explosion, I played sick and went to the nurse. I just dropped the bag on the floor in the hall and some kids kicked it around laughing.
Know of 4chans existence
>>28809888
I played Shrek 2 for over 200 hours
Crawled under the swings in the park. While kids were swinging on them. One hit me in the head and I passed out
>>28809888
Googled, downloaded, somewhat preformatted, and embedded in one layout a lot of Tolkien's works in English, and in my language, including even 'THoMe', when I was 14 or so.
>>28810293
just hurry up and die of your condition faggot
Spent the past 7 years collecting furry porn
>>28810293
>>haha i'm SUPER skinny and have a problem NOBODY else must have, time to tripfag and avoid the point of being anonymous XDXD
>>28809888
I've listen to each song of linkin park at least 100x,
I still listen to linkin park, there isn't any better music
>>28809888
I masturbated with a plastic sword as a kid
i played Animal Crossing DS for 600 hours in 2 years. I fell in love with a lot of characters and i cried when they left the town.
>>28810395
>at least 100x each
you mean like anyone with a favorite band? I've heard all disturbed albums at least 80 times each and listen to a ton of music
>>28810327
fucking hell m8, kek
I took a shit on a alleged paedophiles doorstep.
>>28810395
Legit listening to Linkin Park right now, please snap my neck
>Be me
>At house party
>Waiting in line for bathroom
. Go in bathroom
>Person before me has taken a giant stinky shit
>gonnavom.jpg
>Walk straight back out
>Hot girl is waiting to use bathroom next
>Oh god no
>>She goes in and walks straight out disgusted
>Laugh and say to her "I did that"
>she looks grossed out
>didnt even try to correct what i said because autism
>MFW everyone at the party thinks i did a huge shit and bragged about it
Ever since I watched the office as a kid I've talked to myself like there's a camera filming me, I do this all the time when I'm alone, playing vidya I do my own commentary like I'm making a LP channel.
I'm 20 now and I still do this
i still have pics of my waifu that i saved like 12 years ago
>enjoy reading facts about space
>5th grade
>try to impress a grill with my knowledge
>"hey, pretty grill, did you know that your body is hotter than the surface of Mars?"
>she starts laughing
>I think to myself what happened, am I a loser?
>she starts telling people I said she has a hot body
>realize that what I said would be taken as me telling her I think she's cute
>I smile and walk away
And that was a point of my decline into being a 25 year old virgin.
>>28809888
I used to hug street poles whenever I'm spacing out I still have the urge to grab poles
>>28810395
Ok Preston
If it can be recorded in an excel document I probably record it
>>28810807
thats novel ill give you that
>>28810807
I lean onto streetlights every time I wait at street crossings too... Sometimes I want to swing from them and such. I suppose it's my inner nigger waking up.
>>28810880
yeah that shit is addicting is this ADHD
>asked girl that I had a crush on to tell me really bad things about herself so I'd get turned off from her.
ok, hold on to your seats boys this one is brutal
>17
>mom literally made aspargus and beans for dinner
>trying to get /fit/ so have a huge protein shake afterwards
>don't have to take a shit afterwards
>wake up next day thinking 'I better shit or this will be bad'
>nothing comes out... FUCK
>on way to school, feel tummy rumbling
>feel the brown magma pressing against my sphincter, I can actually smell it and didn't even fart
>guy next to me gives me this look that speaks more than a thousand words, he can smell it too
>bus too late so no time to go to the shitter before class
>the sense of imminent doom washes over me
>in class waiting for the right moment to ask if I can use the bathroom
>teacher says this is important, yoou can go after I'm done explaining
>took her 10 minutes, felt like hours
>literally can't hold it any longer
>teacher let's me go and I stand up
>as I'm standing up, guy behind me thinks it's funny to throw a paperball at me
>usually not that frightened, but this time I'm in so much pain
>let out a screach of surprise, followed by a long ass fucking fart and shit my pants
>it was summer so I was wearing shorts, everything dripped on the floor
>the smell was death, some girls even gagged
>I'm in shock but barely manage to say "well, looks like shit hit the... floor, hehe"
>turn around without looking at anyone or taking any of my stuff and just walk out
>mom is working so I had to take the bus home after cleaning myself, still smelled like absolute death, back of my pants literally drenched in shit
>didn't go to school for a week, when I returned no one even made fun of me, they all just looked at me weird until graduation
Could've been worse I guess, still cringing hard thinking about it.... should have just gone to the fucking bathroom before class
>be young
>at beach for some school thing
>need to shit
>shit in the rocks
>could have shit in the water and cleaned my butt
>>28810894
It might be a trace of a condition. I once read that people with Asperger's like to jump over stuff on the ground, which I would quite do too. My theory is it's because they haven't been indoctrinated by the social norms that adults are 'not supposed' to do it. Or maybe, as you say, it's some sort of overexcitability.
>>28810762
the original or the US version?
i do the same btw its normal
>>28810938
i do that too some times
but normal here can be.. different
>>28810938
US version
>>28809888
I fap to r9k
>>28810730
Kek good job robomate
>>28810762
lel I do the same. I actually started an lp channel to feel less crazy
>>28809888
i got the meningitis vaccine.
i once shat on my grandmothers bed and blamed it on the dog
the next day i shat in the cats litterbox and the cat was taken to the vet because my (human) shit was concernedly too big
>>28811066
Your grandmother may be retarded
>>28811097
that's one of the signs of autism. grandmotheric retardation.
>>28811003
>I actually started an lp channel to feel less crazy
link
>>28810363
25 years faggot :^)
>>28810384
>I hate tripfags!! Let me reply to them! That will teach them!!
>>28810969
definately see the british one, its much better.
more subtlety and cringe, more charming, sophisticated etc.
probably one of my favourite comedies.
>>28810964
i know, but lots of people on4chan have told me they do the same. seems like a natural human way to internally discuss ideas. For me personally i dont so much pretend there is a camera, but more so people, nameless people, but a crowd of people. strange, but not that strange id say.
>>28811115
>grandmotheric
Grandmaternal, anon.
I talk to my stormtrooper from time to time
he's a pretty good guy
>>28809888
when i was 15 i got very drunk and spent 10 minutes begging a girl to kiss me, didnt work.
i dont think anyone can beat that
>>28810858
I thought I was the only one... I have spent thousands of cumulative hours filling hundreds of excel books with data that most people wouldn't bother to record.
>>28809888
I browse /r9k/, please don't judge.
>>28810910
>should have just gone to the fucking bathroom before class
No shit, being late to the class would have been better than shitting your pants.
>>28810447
Hells yea nigga they have the most autististically quote able songs, I haven't got the stomach to visit my Facebook from 2010-2011
>>28810910
>>"well, looks like shit hit the... floor, hehe"
keked hard
>>28811537
facebook existed in 2010?
So this is both sorta autistic and fetishy so please be kind
>going out with my gf for half a year in college, both freshmen
>we have sex a lot but it's about to be spring break so we wanna do something cool
>she is really into yuri doujinshi and some of them have watersports related fetish stuff
>she insists that she's not into that but I'm an idiot
>convince her to try and she agrees
>I have no desire to do this but I convinced myself that she liked it
>we get into the bed, both nude
> she straddles me, takes a bit to et started
>starts peeing on me, kinda hot but not arousing at all
> I get urinated on for a while and just wonder what I'm supposed to do
>pee gets all over the bed
>we switch positions and I piss on her
>bedroom smells like piss, covers soaked, we're covered in piss and completely not turned on
>desperately clean up but room smells awful
I felt really dumb but we're still together and it's funny now
>>28811625
God dammit hitting 24 sure is a bummer
>>28811686
You dumb austistic fuck.
>>28810910
being so autistic you think being late for class is worse than loudly shitting yourself
kek
>>28810910
fucking heIl m8, kek
>"I've seen you at work anon your butt looks huge ;)
>"Oh thanks it's because I have tons of tissues in my pocket."
>no remorse bitch is disgusting but the situation was still autistic as the conversation was from across a room full of my peers
>be 5-6 years old
>mom is at work
>decide to call the stray cat from the woods in our backyard
>bring it inside, up to my room
>i think im alone so i get naked
>hold the cat down flat on its back on my bed
>start rubbing against it's pussy
>uncle walks in and i panic
>the fuck are you doing.jpg
>i fall onto the floor and say im just wrestling the kitty
>>28811686
stopped reading at 'my gf'
>take jar
>fill it with miscellaneous stuff
>think it looks cool
>bury it in the backyard
i've done this multiple times
There are jars filled with bleach, piss, hair, toenails, cum, bullet casings, paint, food, and other stuff buried in multiple yards from houses i've lived in.
as a kid i used to cramp my arms when i was deep in thaught
i still do a similar thing today like clapping with my hands or knees or rub my hands
>>28812966
I used to do this too
>>28810910
>"until graduation"
>you did this in high school
my first and only girlfriend caught me smelling her shoes and socks and jerking if when she came over my house to go swimming. she lied and said her grandma had an accident and she had to go, and texted me after she left that she saw me through the sliding glass door. she told her mom who told my mom. she told her friends who told a bunch of people at school. i am a 29 year old unemployed virgin
>>28812966
>>another anon finds the autism jars
I once asked a girl out when she was way out of my league
Use to listen to disturb ten thousand fists all the time, SOAD Toxicity, Mudvayne, NIN ( think it was "with teeth" at the time), quite a lot, use to love playing it in the car, or while playing halo 2 online while drinking alcohol. Mentioned it in /mu/, they called it autistic.
>>28813086
and what did she say?
>>28812902
Laughing so hard rn and the manager is walking toward me atm
>>28813047
in addition to this life altering depraved mistake that changed everyones perception of me and made me retreat inward in moritification, ive also:
>cum on my sisters rabbit
>drank mouthwash to get drunk at 19, got very intoxicated and weird, and started screaming slipknot songs in my room when i though no one was home. when i finished with my slipknot tantrum i looked at my phone to find a dozen missed calls and texts from my mother saying the neighbor had called and is going to call the police if i dont stop screaming horrible things and scaring their daughter
>called a black kid at school a nigger and got suspended and food thrown at me for it. thankfully it was in the last 2 weeks of high school senior year
>wiped my ass on a beach towel and threw it in my sisters room because she purposely deleted music off of my ipod
>tried to kiss my cousin on 2 different occassions
>>28813115
She cried and her friends started laughing at me
>i kicked a girl for making unpleasant sounds
>>28813144
You are a piece of work.
>>28813154
Damn, that's harsh.
Mine just looked at me like I just said something ridiculous and offensive and said "Really?" before rolling her eyes and giggling with her friend, then went "Ummm.. yeah, NO."
>>28810421
This is kind of cute autism at least. Did you always play by yourself though
>>28810799
It's all about how you play it off. If you just laughed it off with her and doubled down and actually started to nerd it up to keep her entertained, then that might have actually been a really good pickup line for a confident nerd. You have a few more years until you are not young anymore. You can still learn.
>>28810799
you could've been the 5th grade chad with lines like that amigo
>rented a room in an apartment
>me and two others
>get on with them well
>one guy has a party before he leaves
>english giga chad but i like him
>knocks on my door, asks if i want to join them
>sit on the balcony for a bit with a few of his friends and talk
>goes well
>get through the party without autism, someone friends with my brother was there and ended up speaking with him and his friends for a while
>ask if i am coming into the city around 1am
>remember i have a project i need to hand in
>submit it
>decide to stay in since i had done nothing retarded
>everyone gone
>put on some hentai
>suddenly someone in my room
>she screams
>i trip over my jeans, hit my head
>knocked out
>woke up in an ambulance
>she had come back to get her bag, opened my room door instead of the storeroom and found me jerking it to cartoon porn
>called the ambulance when i hit my head
>alerted evryone else too
>about 50 people saw my penis and chinese cartoon porn on screen
Never spoke to any of them again
>>28813154
they laughed at her crying?
some bitches
I once created the entire pokedex all the way up to the hoenn region as a powerpoint presentation and showed it to all my friends at school.
>>28809888
>be newfag on 4chan
>see cool thread
>"awww yeah I'll save this link to look at it later"
>open up thread some time later
>404
>wtf
>>28813336
>>about 50 people saw my penis and chinese cartoon porn on screen
That's some American Pie tier shit.
>>28813348
Well at least no one saw it
>>28813043
dunno what's the equivalent here in yurop is, thought it just meant finishing school
well, I only had one year left so, all is well
only thing is, every time I see one of my classmates in the supermarket or elsewhere I get really nervous and kind of start talking like a robot and doing robot moves, but very subtle robot moves to imagine I'm a robot who has no feelings so this awkwardness can't hurt me but it doesn't always work
>>28813375
Audible kek
Originalo commentino
http://michiganradio.org/post/michigan-radio-rds-breach
https://mobile.twitter.com/nprfreshair/status/443095710498430976
At least she had a sense of humor about it.
>>28813375
oh its a deep burn
>>28813375
Brutal, savage, brilliant!
>>28809888
>pick my boogers and eat them
>arrange objects on tables so they are parallel
>make sure surfaces are clean from debris
>piss in sinks
>piss in bottles
>pulled insects apart
Found a twinkish, yet straight, emo/scene guy on Instagram who lives in the same city as me. I pay him money to do weird foot stuff. I've paid him to lick his feet, massage and lotion his feet, and even sleep under his sheets at night at the end of the bed with his soles pressed on me. He is 18 and a senior at the same high school I used to go to. He was a freshman when I was a senior, but he doesn't seem to remember me.
>>28813707
that's not autistic, it's only character traits
>>28812902
kek
ORIGINAL
ORIGANO
ORIGAMI
>>28810262
>fake mass murder paper
>got out of hand
Story?
>girl in my history college class
>teacher is young and makes a Twitter for our class and tells us to follow her
>found the Twitter of the cute girl
>from there find her tumblr and Instagram
>stalk both, finds out she has a bf
>I proceed to stalk his pages and write a nasty review of his mixtape
>pinpoint the location of her home and work based on landmarks in the photos
>work in the records office of the Uni and get her SSN
> learn her class schedule to be in the area where I can see here
>too pussy to do anything 2 years later
>>28811510
>no shit
kek
>>28813707
>Hurt insects
Fuck you! I hope you have dreams about being crushed and tortured by giant bugs.
>>28813349
I made text documents with URLs and post numbers.
>>28813085
>finds one in the yard
>looks at it
>"yes... yes."
>buries his own
>moves away eventually
>next robot drawn to the property
>cycle continues
All will be jarred
>>28813375
ABSOLUTE
FUCKING
SAVAGE
>>28814599
Don't be such a bitch, this is the internet
>>28809888
Browsing 4chan, Tumblr and Imgur on a daily basis.
>>28814297
I d-didnt do anything wrong. I needed ro know about her so I found out everything. Cannot comprehend your emotional distress"
>>28814871
>Tumblr
>Imgur
Get the FUCK OUT rOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
>>28809888
I used to unironically like reddit
>>28814990
This is the worst one in the thread
>traveled across the planet to meet a girl that didn't exist despite my parents warning
>was wearing white NBs unironically the whole time
>>28814215
Whoa, thank god you commented kek, good sir
>>28815153
story?o-ri-ji-neh-li-tee
>>28809888
>Be 12
>Big fan of the Yu-Gi-Oh anime
>I enter a Yu-Gi-Oh tournament
>I don't even know how to play Yu-Gi-Oh
>>28810799
Mars is fucking cold, no wonder she was unimpressed
>>28813144
LEGEND
E
G
E
N
D
I wish I knew you irl, we'd be a great double team
>>28813349
>>28814610
>be confused on how to make an account
>see the post fields
>write in my fucking E-mail when I post
>>28815224
>meet a hot russian girl on a dating chat room
>she wants to move to australia and live with me
>first i am planning to stay with her family for a few days in russia and we will return to australia
>the evening of my flight is here
>decide to tell my parents say 'absolotely no'
>sneak out of my room later and get my cousin to drive me to the airport
>3 days flying on a shitty airline with literally hundreds of muslims praying chanting allahu akbar every few hours
>try to call and text her when the plane lands
>tfw no response
>tfw catching the bus to her home town and walking in the streets comparing the houses to a pic she sent me
>tfw her accounts are deleted a few hours later
>>28815425
Damn wtf
You realize she did exist, but she didn't think your autistic ass would actually go to Russia
>>28815425
What was your parents' reaction when you came back?
>>28815514
they didn't have much to say, they claim to have known from the moment i showed her pic.
>>28815488
lets just say i probably should have reverse googled her pics first.
>>28814254
He dropped it before he could spread it around.
I daydream about happy and fulfilling life I could have instead of killing myself like I should
Pretty autistic
>>28813336
Just realize that whatever you're looking at while you jerk off you could pass out and be found by your family, roommates, police, etc. Still want to watch tranny granny porn? Didn't think so.
>>28810395
is this you? comment is totally original
>chad and his friends will kick your ass
>you just purchased a fallout 4 season pass
>>28809888
posting this in the wrong thread
>>28815925
>Error post too long
I was browsing 4chan within a few months of it coming out. You're here forever.
I was threatened with homelessness for watching/singing Silver Forest Kero 9 at 4am by my unemployed stepfather.
I spend every day inside if possible.
When people start persecuting me over something, I just shut down. There has literally never been a time someone has believed me when I told the truth, and I hate lying.
OCD is in my blood, and it's dangerously Autismal sometimes. I got these little plastic containers for DIY projects, and their dimensions were off by like 1mm all around. I complained, halfway through I'm like oh god what am I doing, and they sent me a dollar to give them a positive review.
To be honest my behavior has a lot more in common with psychopathy than Autism, but depression, ADHD, perfectionism, OCD, etc, overlap a lot. I have been on more medications than the majority of people could name.
>>28816126
I've been diagnosed with ADHD and have been prescribed with medication. Did you find that the medication has helped much?
>>28809888
Post anonymously on a cambodian cave painting forum for the past eight years of my miserable existence.
>>28816164
No, but literally I've only responded to an MAOI, and it sorta drowns out the constant terror. Nothing has helped the ADHD, whether it was an antidepressant, stim (both Ritalin and Adderall), mood stabilizer, etc.
I do take guanfacine, because although it doesn't really help with the ADHD, it keeps me my motivation a little more stable. On average I get more done on it than off, but I still don't get nearly enough done.
It's a "dangerous" suggestion, but I went full-bore into ADHD. Unreal Tournament 99 on higher speeds and difficulty, Brain Workshop for short-term memory, Nethack and some other games for tolerating tediousness and training short facts. My long-term memory is trash, but I can still function because I'm going multiple times normal speed with fact access to information.
>>28816444
P.s. structure is important to functioning. Read "The Games People Play" and follow your SICP:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Op3QLzMgSY
http://deptinfo.unice.fr/~roy/sicp.pdf
http://www.call-cc.org/
I pick my nose and eat it when nobody can see me
all the time
>3rd grade
>Switch school because i moved
>Get into class with lots of Turks (from Germany, go figure)
>Avoid them because socially awkward
>P.E. class on second day
>Fall down from a bar I was supposed to walk over
>Turkroach laughs loudly
>Grab box and smash it against his head till the teacher stopped me
>Not get in any trouble "because he is new here"
Still don't regret trying to kill that fat piece of shit
>>28810762
who is the guy on the right in the picture?
>>28812966
As an archaeologist, this excites me. Imagine someone finding your cum-jar in 600 years and attributing it hilariously to some religious ceremony
>>28809888
>We confess autistic things we have done
>>28809888
>drunk grill starts playing with my hair
>gets into my lap
>stand up and throw her on the floor
>Literally make REEEE noise
Fucking normies respect muh bubble.
>>28809911
and then you were sent to a mental institution. but desu its okay, ive been there myself, they clean ur poopy butt for u and feed you all the tendies u want
>>28809888
i poopied in the urinal at my HS every friday. after 5 weeks of doing it, i was finally given the name, the mysterious pooper. i was the most feared person in school, like voldamort, the poopy wizard
>>28810416
r u gril? post tits now
>>28810395
Well I have a story for that...
>visit my old friend
>haven't seen him in 3-4 years
>look and see he's got an iMac
>ohshitson, let me see that thing
>he goes to the bathroom, I'm browsing
>go to iTunes
>only one song over 7,000 plays its
>Linking park -in the end
>>28809888
I beat up a 13 year old when I was 20 for sniffing a lot
>>28815425
If this story isn't fake, well that's really bad
>>28809888
Argue with my Dad in public while shouting then start crying.
We good now, though.
Every single day I run around my house and pretend to have powers and run autistic fantasies in my head.
>>28817759
SHE TOUCHED YOU? why didnt you turn around and fucking punch that slut in her whore face? that is literally sexual harassment!!!
>>28817163
MF DOOM
oririgiginal
>>28816489
I do this pretty often. I also love the smell of my balls and farts, its oddly intoxicating.
>>28813140
Rip
Yo soy original commentatario
>>28811177
That's not autistic, that's schizophrenic.
>>28814846
Not the other guy buthurting insects is really mean.
>>28810327
Top kek there mate. Holy shit, why?
>>28810910
>you did this in your abitur
>abitur
>13th class
Nigga what? Your life should be fucked from then on holy shit.
Also fucking kek.
>>28815690
KEKEKEKEK
roboto san originall desu
>>28811686
What the fuck actually? How do people get these ideas? Seriously, this is beyond stupid and autistic.
>>28813375
#RIGGITY REKT
>>28816954
You're my hero. I know your feel. Germanbro here. I fucking hate this country So many turkroaches back then and even more now. Why are such shitty people allowed to live here?
I used to shit into my hand, wrap it in toilet paper, and hide it behind the toilet.
>>28820130
Why you are literally near the toilet
>>28819435
When I was a depressed 7-year-old, I once tore off legs of a spider(yes, I know, spiders aren't insects). I started to regret it afterwards. I still do sometimes, even though it was over 20 years ago.
>>28814871
Aren't we supposed to be autistic, not normies.
>>28812902
I also once tried fucking the neighbors cat when I was 13. I was in the room of my mother rubbing my dick against her asshole and pussy. I tried inserting it but it didnt fucking work. After a while I realized that the curtains were not closed and neighbors could have seen it. Since we live in a terrace house there are several families that might have looked at us
>>28816489
Same. When I was about 7-8 years old, I would also stick it everywhere.
I like memorizing language. I read things over and over again. I repeat them in my head. When I fail, when I can't remember something, I cannot rest until I've looked it up.
The part where it gets really autistic is that I sometimes unknowingly slightly mouth the words, even when I'm doing it in public, thus exposing my powerlevel.
>>28819054
No, it isn't, unless the stormtrooper responds.
>be 15
>cutting pubes with scissors
>accidently nip sack, start bleeding
>take sack blood and smear it on my face like a tribal warrior and start making intimidating faces to myself in the mirror
>>28820642
u became a man that day
>>28820764
A rite of passage.
>>28813336
>mfw I fap to lolis with dicks
If that were to happen to me I would have to off myswlf
>>28813144
You should kys
>>28810910
>"well, looks like shit hit the... floor, hehe"
>>28813198
Sounds like a stacy
>>28809888
used to think slender man was real
nice trips
>wore the same sweatshirt literally every day and stopped because a teacher told me kids talked about it behind my back
>got made fun of for my haircut once so I went home and accidentally JUSTed myself trying to fix it, got made fun of even more
>cried on the school bus after being made fun of too much
>Memorize the class periods of all the girls That were hot so i can follow them and look at their asses
> Shit my pants in the first grade
> Beat a kid with a rock because he said i liked a girl in kindergarten
> Kids would groan and complain when i was picked to be on their team.
>>28814297
I've pinned everyone of significance to me on google earth.
I was at my sisters house about 3 weeks ago and her little girl (like 3-4 years old) was there pissing me off while my sister was in the kitchen. Anyway she keeps saying dumb little kid stuff to me and I just end up going "leave me the fuck alone you stupid little cup of millipede cum!"
She sort of just went and sat on the couch and sulked, and it could have ended there. But my sister walked in the room like 2 seconds after I said it, and she MUST have heard it. she never said anything though. She hasn't spoken to me since it happened.
bump for autismo
When I was in high school I used to rub a girl's legs almost every day.
She was very uncomfortable and used to clench her legs very tight, but never said anything about it.
The whole class knew, everyone treated me like a pervert and avoided me.
>>28821971
>millipede
Why
>>28814664
this reminds me of that Recess episode
>>28822101
what
the
fuck
How were you not moved? What were you thinking? What age?
>>28821824
>always wear the same ugly clothes
>used to get bullied every day because of that
>go to a different school now
>tfw still in fear of getting bullied
shurmp autismo
>>28822101
Yeah I'm gonna need more info on this
>>28822179
>>28822316
I was 17 I think.
I kept doing it because I couldn't read the signs, I thought "if she lets me do it she probably doesn't mind". That's why I'm posting this in the autism thread, I was autistic as fuck.
A class mate even asked me about it, I just watched her in silence because I was embarrassed.
>>28822341
I don't know how you'd even get started on that shit though
>>28809888
I often roleplay different kinds of people on this site just to b8 people. Almost nothing I've posted on this site is actually true, but the laughs are worth it.
>>28821971
this one's tickled me. what a fucking wierd thing to say
Used to shit in the bath water before I got into it and pretend I was having a bath in a giant toilet
>>28822380
Pretending to be autistic is actually a higher level of autism.
>>28822372
I was a horny teen.
>>28822457
Hence why I posted it, anon. Not denying I have the 'tism.
>>28813349
>tfw fgts.jp is kill
>>28811686
>>going out with my gf
stopped reading right there, get the fuck out
>>28810356
found the niggerfaggot
i humped the space between the two matresses of my parents bed like a vagina when i was really young. it felt better than masturbating with my hand back then.
>get kicked out of class freshman year
>write suicide note on bathroom wall
>cameras
>school "suspends" me and asks parents to take me to a hospital
>tfw they knew by then it was hopeless and just let me play vidya all day
>>28811003
10 hours late but link
>>28809895
How am I the first person to reply to this?
>>28823213
There was a camera in the bathroom?
>tfw an autistic story of yours is so horrible, you can't even tell other anons
>mfw
>>28823378
There's literally nothing wrong with helping a dog-bro out
>>28820469
"us"
like you gangbanged it?
>>28823613
It was pointed at the door. They could see who went in and out but not what they were doing inside.
>>28811686
fucking mother of keks
i am still an avid player of runescape in 2016
kill me
I once wrote a huge (probably 10 posts worth) of ways to picking up a girlfriend and posted it here. no one replied.
I suck and can't even get a girlfriend, but I had a huge inspiration to write one evening so I sat down and jotted note after note.
It was more of what I have seen and read from normies more than anything.
I thought I was writing awe inspiring shit.
>>28809888
Got comatose drunk and pissed myself 10+ times in a span of 3 years. pissed my phone to death one of the times, lied and said I left it in water.
>>28825091
i want to start playing runescape in 2016
>>28811177
Do you hunt Traitors together?
>>28813349
>be newfag
>start on/mlp/
>namefag more than a fem"""""bot"""""
>am that one snowflake faggot
>kept doing this for weeks before I took a hint
>>28818622
Underrated i do this everyday
>>28809888
Made this thread:
>>28825576
I used to cum in my eye in the early hours of the day so I could get pink eye and miss school.
>few weeks post exodus to infinite chan
>was namefagging as "Hell" on new /b/
>thought it was really clever and funny
>nobody else thought so
>eventually people got pissed
>lots of people started namefagging as "Hell"
>lasted for about a day
It didn't get as bad as "Rin" but I felt stupid. I genuinely thought I looked cool
I'm a 27 year old virgin who has known quite a few girls/women that were attracted to me. Hell, the vast majority of them were also very attractive.
The problem? I'm just not an attractive guy. I actually, legitmately get angry when I find out that a girl considers me to be attractive. Sadly enough, I crave sex. I want to have sex with a girl so bad, yet I realize that I ak just not an attractive person. The situation is infuriating and demoralizing at the same time.
>>28825690
oh i wish
>>28825960
You're the type of faggot that draws the Mona Lisa then says you're not good at drawing. Get the fuck off this board normy.
>>28810762
FUCKING SAME, in my head I am a corny Dr.Doom esque super villain who is constantly being interviewed.
I have gone to the mall to randomly meet stranger girls like a pickup artist type of shit.
It was pretty awful.
>>28825893
Where is that from senpai?
>be me
>like 7 or 8
>with two "friends" who are just my neighbors
>one of them is a grade above
>one of them is a grade below
>both brothers
>anyway, there was some construction going on on our street
>dumptruck parked across the street from my house with the winshield facing me and said friends
>older kid makes a bet that i can throw a rock from my yard, over the street and over the truck
>throw rock
>smashes part of truck's windshield
>"WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO MY TRUCK"
>friends fucking bolt faster than niggers from a crime scene
>i run to my mom
>"Anon, what was that yelling"
>i confess
>she walks me to the guy who owned the truck, he was in a tractor
>"Anon wants to apologize"
>mumble sorry
>if my mom wasn't there he would have beat the shit out of me, i could see Hell in his eyes
I have some more
>>28826660
not that autistic, just kid stuff i guess
tell us a more autistic one
>>28825918
thats autistic but you're even more autistic for thinking that was worth while to say
>>28826660
Another little thing
>in kindergarten
>in castle with four other kids
>one girl and two boys
>"Anon let's play family" the grill says
>Why not
>"So anon, what do families do?"
>"I dont know, hug eachother and stuff"
>she says "well then" and leans in and kisses me
>dont forget this is kindergarten
>the two boys run out of the plastic castle along with another kid outside who saw it
>tattle on us
>both get in trouble
>i was made fun about it by my family until high school
>started distancing myself from people and i only hung out with people i took time to get to know, even through high school
>dont know who she was because i never remembered who she was
There's some more too, both kid shit and teen shit
>>28826787
Moar kid shit
>taking shit, im like 8 or 9
>this was right after we moved
>i used to take shits fully nude
>start messing with the door handle because its right next to the toilet
>take huge smelly shit
>open door
>lock it
>go outside and close it
>now im locked out of the bathroom where i just took a shit in and i forgot to flush
>parents come up to me sobbing
>yell at me
>cry in outside the bathroom for 2 hours while my dad dismantles the door lock
>it stunk
I never got a lock back on that door.
>>28826876
Middle school is where i started to get fucked up.
>in science
>class has a pet hamster
>recess, all students leave and teachers leave for lunch
>at the time i was discovering boners and shit
>get a little 2 inch hard on
>wait for everybody to leave classroom
>go to hamster cage in the science classroom
>turn lights off
>take hamster out and lay it on its back on a desk
>rub my peepee on its genital area
>teacher walks in to get his lunch bag to me rubbing my 2 inch boner on a hamster
>get suspended for a week but luckily the other students never found out
The hamster was gone when I came back, I think they got rid of it or it died.
>>28826973
>Your dick killed a hamster
Anyway, to answer OP's question I ate a goldfish once. Not the snack, I mean the living kind
>>28810799
should have said mercury laddy mars is cold as shit.
>>28826094
>normy
I'm a virgin, dude. Chill.
I played and beat Shadow the Hedgehog over 100 times. Wish I was kidding. What the fuck was I doing with my life...
>28822380
i do this in real life
>>28811686
I did something similar to this.
>gf pees when she cums hard sometimes
>she never lets me finish her when i'm giving her oral because she's afraid she's going to pee
>tie her up and blindfold her one day, set up some towels and shit to put her on
>suck on her clit until she's begging me to stop
>don't stop
>think it's gonna be really hot when she pees on my face
>hard as diamonds
>she cums
>she pees all over my face
>suddenly realize i have made a mistake
>gag
>she hears
>gets really mad at me
>untie her and leave with piss on my face
>people see me
>can smell the piss
>gf calling me every 30 seconds
>go hide in shower and cry
>>28817163
Mf doom man!
i blew up my school's microwave
>>28821866
> Kids would groan and complain when i was picked to be on their team.
This one fucking hurt. I had forgotten all about this.
>>28811686
>my gf
kill yourself
>>28809888
Don't really think it's autistic, but I make youtube videos about my friends face.
>>28828190
If you act like this much of a baby when things go wrong in the bedroom, kys
>>28823931
>tfw just thinking about your stories makes you feel so uncomfortable that you don't have the courage to type them down
They aren't even that bad, but they bring back so many horrible feelings.
I have always gone around carrying small medal like things. I have spent $300 on diecast Kamen Rider cell medals since I watched the show in 2010. I have not had one with me all day three times in the last six years.
>>28818622
Same, except instead of pretending to have powers I either imagine myself telling jokes to my old friends and being happy with them or torturing and killing the people I hate.
>>28828381
How on original?
>at the drive-in with my dad and brother
>in charge of getting snacks
>buy a large popcorn some mini snickers and three sodas
>struggling to carry it all back to the car
>change falls out of my pocket
>five dollars on the ground
>stare at it
>hands are full, nowhere to set everything down
>decide to keep moving
>lady stops me
>says "it's 5 dollars, you're not just gonna leave it are you? I can pick it up for you"
>"n-no it's fine haha"
>shuffle back to the car
>feel her staring as I walk away
>tell my dad there was no change
>me
>elementary school
>had crush on the same girl since kindergarten
>she was the hottest girl in the entire school and continued being that hot up until I last saw her at the end of junior high
>she's the kind of girl who is so attractive she got more than 30 roses ever valentines day
>in junior high she had more than 20 guys orbiting her but she wasn't a roastie whore and always shrugged them off
>Smart too, advanced placement sort classes but not too smart, above average but still not intimidating or anything
>I still think she's the most beautiful girl I have ever seen
>anyway, back to elementary school
>she had a crush on me
>I was so stupid I had no idea
>we were both too shy to talk to eachother because so young (cooties, icky, you know)
>When she was on a play date with her friend, the friend always called my house and said "Stacy wants to talk to you", stacy would be too shy
>At school she always uncontrollably smiled at me and I did the same to her
>Looked at eachother occasionally
>in hindsight, she clearly puts 100% effort into trying to get me to go on a date with her.. the specifics aren't important
>this goes on until grade 7
>I enter a really, really fucked neo-vegan weirdo depression and just close myself off to everybody
>Start wearing all black, never shower
>edgy
>She says to me "I noticed you stopped hanging out with your friends, everything ok?"
>I, thinking its cool to be edgy and also being legitimately edgy and depressed say
>"that's none of your fucking concern"
>she never talked to me again
this might not sound like a lot and maybe I'm not explaining this very well but this is the thing I regret most in life. I don't know why I think its so important but.. ah fuck it I don't want to explain this shit, it makes me feel terrible. I guess I'm just venting.
>>28829392
I'm going to explain why I went into a neo-vegan really fucked and depressed and just overall shit-fucked-up phase even though nobody asked. I have seen every graphic peta video they made up until I stopped being so fucked. By "graphic" I mean pretty decent resolution videos of things like live goats getting their feet cut off with bolt cutters. Full audio and everything, goats scream like people I found out. That really fucked me up. Peta really shouldn't make those videos so easy to see for kids.
still venting
>>28829558
I watched that video too, it made me vegetarian.
It was over six years ago, holy shit.
I can't think of anything I've done but I know I have done autistic stuff
How do I remember anything? The only thing I can remember is that I ate alone every day in highschool in the hallway instead of in the place where you're supposed to eat
>fingered myself with a fake-rubber-arm for med students, was never caught
>let flies land on my vagina while watching Animaniacs
>made a Yahoo Answers question about a boy at school using his full name and everyone found out
>shit in the woods for fun
>made nests and slept in them on the floor
>wore my bangs in front of my face for all of middle school because I wanted to be an anime character (the girls that made fun of me were "jealous")
>like to chew burgers and fries, spit them out, and eat them again because the texture is better
I have autism tho
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yq625-8A8bc
>>28830406
that kid looks like he's just enjoying himself and playing a video game
whats so bad about that?
