/britfeel/
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need a May OP image edition
First crying fit of the year lads, did pretty well getting to May (even if only just).
Only another one expected on my birthday, so we're doing just fine I guess.
>>28255560
>need a May OP image edition
Is it really hard to open the image in paint and cross off april? Jesus, no wonder half you fucks end up working in supermarkets.
>kill all pakis
>replace with slavs
thoughts lads?
why is centre spelled centre instead of center?
>>28255612
Hot girl slavs into robots?
>>28255611
I don't think paint can save the image under the 2mb limit without scaling it down significantly.
its needs to be done in photoshop using the save for web feature.
G'day ya pommy bastards
leaving the house in 5 minutes, wish me luck lads x
Anyone know who the girl is on my Calendar lads?
>>28255638
Jesus fuck, how fucking stupid are you?
>>28255592
>how can you fail at killing yourself? did you try meme methods like slitting your wrists or hanging?
I was only 17/18 at the time and I hadn't done my homework as it was just impulse so I did use meme methods, yes. The first time was hanging but when I kicked the chair away the place I had tied the rope broke under my weight so I just ended up on the floor with a sore ass. Second time I was drunk and decided I was going to OD so I ate all the medicine in the house but all it did was give me a sore kidneys for a few days.
>sounds like you did it for attention or a cry for help.
I disagree. Nobody outside of this thread ever found out about either of the attempts. No one has any idea at all that I am suicidal. I cannot think of anything worse than having people find out I am suicidal/crazy.
>id you really wanted to end yourself you would. jumping off a really high cliff
I realise this now. If I were to go for it again I am fairly certain I would go off of a local cliff as the length of the drop leaves nothing to chance.
>>28255672
beth lily
>>28255694
that's odd... I said that because I tried it before and it always went over 2mb.
>>28255726
You're probably pissing about with changing the file format without noticing.
>>28255144
Just got off the phone lads. Manager said they'd give me a fiver off on my next shop. Also said the woman would receive 'disciplinary action', whatever that means. Feel a little bad but it really pissed me the fuck off when the fat cunt did it.
>>28255779
You're in the right lad. Good on you
>>28255813
this
she won't try it again with another poor robot lad who is too shy to speak up now
>>28255831
It's also much more brutal to do this. Bet she'll get that one bong docked from her pay too
>>28255932
five bongs considering the lad is getting that much off on his next shop. she'll have a hour where she works for like only 2 bongs kek
Fucks sake Leicester.
>>28255964
Hopefully they'll charge her for all the papers sold that day. Fucking roastie can't be trusted
>>28255979
>not wanting them to fuck up and lose out
would be the funniest outcome, fuck them and the invetiable 500 documentaties and vardy biopic if they win it
NOT TODAY LESTER
>>28256099
>actively wanting the fucking yids to win ffs
Have Leicester officially turned heel? They've got near the title and now are using the refs to carry them over the line.
It is like when Stone Cold Steve Austin teamed up with Vince McMahon.
Afternoon lads.
Spent most of the day winding people up on Yik Yak. Surprised I haven't been banned yet.
>>28256147
Nah, they're still face because they're the underdog.
Just now they're more of a Dean Ambrose dickhead face than a Rey Mystery paragon of virtue face.
>>28256171
Rey Mysterio. Fucking autocorrect.
>>28255612
Apply globally.
>>28256171
>Dean Ambrose
>watching modern day wwe
>>28256171
Hmmm maybe, they haven't won clean very much lately though.
>>28256156
I got banned for a joke about feminism
I said something like "What do feminist and pi have in common? They're both irrational!"
May waifus
soon we will be worse off than the Americans
Anyone else take tablets called Sertraline? If anything, these are making me feel worse.
>>28256715
come off them go back to docs
>>28255560
Question for Britbots:
Is the girl from Kiniro Mosaic revered here and if yes, why?
Is she an accurate representation for British lolis?
>>28256741
I know, but they are anti-depressants, what's the point of an anti-depressant that makes you feel worse? I half suspect my doc is giving me a hint and telling me to just an hero already.
>>28256760
Yes, and yes
yesococ
>>28256372
You got banned for that?!
I have been posting about Hitler and how the jews are bad and nothing yet.
Let's play a game, /britfeel/.
Guess the year of this newspaper publication.
>>28256869
/current year/more like 1974
>>28256402
>eat around 10,000 calories yesterday
>lose a pound when I wake up
everything always turns out okay in the end, lads~
doing a no-fap lads.
I did 2 weeks back in march and I want to beat my PB
>>28256855
Fee fees matter loads to feminists don't they
just woke up lads
ffs
>>28256983
Serious questions here lad. Are you getting some proper help?
>>28256869
i dont know------77
>>28256983
walk us through your day yesterday
>>28256965
>>28257068
>more like 1974
>77
Earlier.
>>28257043
wew lad the days already over
hope you're not working tomorrow or anything
>>28256402
over a week later and i still feel really quite ill, i guess this is how i die.
>>28257089
69 maybe it could possibly be perhaps maybe originalll
>>28257130
Even earlier, lad.
>>28257059
Well I am seeing a doctor now, I have another appointment on Tuesday~
>>28257076
>wake up and eat breakfast
>throw up
>eat lunch
>throw up
>eat again
>throw up
>watch some anime and tell myself I'm not going to be sick again
>go to Tesco and buy food again
>throw it up then sleep
Not a lot really happens. Just eating, throwing up and watching anime desu~
>>28257203
>Well I am seeing a doctor now, I have another appointment on Tuesday~
Glad to hear it. Hopefully they won't need to start IV feeds but you do need to get on top of the vomiting
>be off britfeel for a month
>come back
>that fat cunt still hasn't killed himself
Life is suffering.
>>28257429
Poleaboo is starting to post less and less though. Soon he'll be gone forever.
Is the poleaboo gimmick really dead lads?
>>28256983
>>28257203
when we getting them pics Tilde love?
>>28257429
>>28257457
The prison gay harem have started to fuck off as well. Still a couple of lonely gaybots, but they don't spam anime as much as those shitters do
>>28257457
He's now crossdressing for (You)s. I posted about how the animu lads doing that was pathetic a while back.
>>28257478
Keep your eyes peeled to the manc newspapers. He's jumping off a bridge in the next few days.
>>28257457
That's a shame as Poleaboo is endlessly entertaining. Unlike bitch tits over there.
Does bonsai still post? He's a good egg.
>>28257510
>That's a shame as Poleaboo is endlessly entertaining.
He was until he started fag posting. Now I don't look forward to his updates anymore.
>>28257530
You know that's an impostor right?
>>28257510
>Does bonsai still post? He's a good egg.
bonsai was a machine leaning algorithm being trained on 4chan posts, it has since ascended into the cloud and achieved sentience.
>>28257545
Tbf there's a good chance he's been arrested
>>28257576
>Tbf there's a good chance he's been arrested
http://www.rochdaleonline.co.uk/news-features/2/news-headlines/102640/man-arrested-on-suspicion-of-unlawful-sexual-activity
It's been 3 months lads and the fucking job centre are asking me to do work experience, how do I get out of it without losing muh benefits?
I have some ideas to improve Poleaboo as a character:
One, Poleaboo needs to be louder, angrier, and have access to a time machine. Two, whenever Poleaboo not posting, all the other posters should be asking "Where's Poleaboo?"
>>28257615
Nah not him, he's not 29.
>>28257615
>29
He's not that old
>>28257627
say youre too depressed to do it
get involuntarily commited
get on depression meds
>>28257649
>>28257652
I didn't even read it, I typed in "rochdale arrest" (awful lot of terrorism related stories came up) and saw that headline
>>28257627
Fake a suicide attempt. Only way out.
>>28257545
I thought it was an imposter when he started cutting but that turned out to be him.
>>28257627
What kind of experience
>>28256402
A vague feeling of emptiness, anger, and sadness.
>>28257627
wow you really do suck hell why am I even here I got a job
>>28257627
I don't think there is a way mate, I had to quit the job center when they tried to get me to do slave labour in a warehouse.
I have some ideas to improve Junlad
One, he should kill himself
>>28257693
>but that turned out to be him
Fuck off, the guy in those pics was white
>>28257658
>>28257673
Wait, talk me through this lads, i'm clueless.
I've considered trying to get diagnosed as depressed for the extra benefit bux but i'm to awkward to deal with lying to a doctor.
How do you do this?
I'm shitting myself at the though of having to work for free with strangers
>>28257632
Think he's doing it to gauge interest?
>>28257627
>how do I get out of it
Don't.
Use your hatred of it to motivate you to get a real job
>>28257724
Walk to a hospital and say you just tried to kill yourself.
>>28257724
>I'm shitting myself at the though of having to work for free with strangers
Work for money then you scrounging cunt
>>28257756
Give me a job.
>>28257772
Join the civil service.
Hell work for the DWP and spend your day alternating between sanctioning cunts and tea breaks
Guess it was a mistake asking here... i'm a pathetic useless cunt with no job experience so nobody will take me on.
Also incredibly bad in face to face social interations with people i don't know. Tried to get diagnosed as autistic but Dr said i'm just very shy...
Only reason i'm not homeless is my uncle said he'd give me his spare room if i gave him half my jobseekers..
if i lose that i'm fucked.
pls help
>>28257842
>pls help
What are we supposed to do lad? Look for cleaning jobs or tray washing or some shit.
>>28257842
>pls help
Go on the work experience
Does anyone remember that lad who got a new step dad that said he was going to slave labour him in his mate's garage? Whatever happened to him in the end?
We told him to Fight Club his step dad but I don't know if he went along with it.
>>28257842
become someones personal cumdump
>>28257867
I know what i'm like, i'll chicken the fuck out when the day comes around and i'll get sanctioned, i cannot deal with being around a bunch of strangers who expect me to do a job i know i'll be shit at.
Does anyone here get depression money? tell me exactly what you did please!
>>28255611 very cool dubs senpai
>>28255744 really lovely dubs bro
>>28256099 tidy dubs guy
>>28256688 truly briliant dubs mate
>>28256855 good dubs bro
>>28257711 truly grandiose dubs bro
>tfw I haven't made any changes to this script for like months now
>>28257921
Then ask yourself, do you really deserve to avoid sanctions if you have no intention of ever getting off bennies?
>>28257842
Why don't you become a career criminal? If you are autistic that means you have no conscience so it should be easy.
>>28257921
Then take the sanction hit and get over it.
I love watching dole scroungers get BTFO. Hilarious to read them whinging in these threads.
>>28257921
>Does anyone here get depression money? tell me exactly what you did please!
depression on it's own won't do it, you need other mental shit too.
>>28257627
I thought the minimum was six months before slave labour was mandatory? I haven't been on the dole in 3 years so fuck knows what's changed. Anyway if you have any prior job experience you can tell them to fuck off but if you came fresh out of college or being a neet time to buckle up and bend over mate.
My advice is get a job where there would be minimum effort required, don't go doing slave labour working your arse off in a warehouse or a busy shop, get a nice quiet office and do jobs at your own pace, it's what I did
>>28257921
You're too scared to go work in poundland because you don't know the people there.
But you think you can con a doctor who's job it is to keep people off autismbux?
Nah son, you're fucked
>>28257947
Sanction = No jobseekers = Homeless
if I become homeless I wont survive and will probably kill myself, my parents disowned me.
Some of you probably see me killing myself as a solution but i want to avoid it.
I don't ask for much and i'd never break the law, I live on 100 per month after what my uncle takes.
Anyone else in my situation/been through this i'd really appreciate the advice
>>28258123
>I don't ask for much and i'd never break the law
Maybe you should. 4 years in prison is enough to complete a degree (free of charge), get mental health assistance and occupational therapy (again free) and get some much needed social skills.
>>28258123
>Anyone else in my situation/been through this i'd really appreciate the advice
The solution is called getting a job.
>>28258123
Get a job in a warehouse or any kind of night shift if it's really that bad. also try not to look for any excuses for not taking those jobs (i.e your physically weak or need lots of sleep)
>>28258123
start finishing off those anime and vidya lad, you'll be killing yourself very soon.
>>28258123
at what age did your parents disown you if you don't mind me asking
>You will be paid 35 pounds per every 1000 leaflets plus samples delivered
does this seem like a good rate or will i be lucky to even get 35 quid a day?
never done leafleting before.
>>28258235
That sounds horrible desu
>>28257627
Do the work experience, then you can put it on your CV and might actually get a job.
>>28258235
Did they mention the 10 other guys in your area already doing it and the council rules stopping you positing them through houses someone else has already done, meaning you will be lucky to shift a dozen without travelling 10 miles away?
I assume you have to buy the leaflets from them in the first place?
>>28258179
>and get some much needed social skills
He's right, shower banter with inmate lads is the best, just don't drop the soap. Oh and don't play white man music too loud or paki paul and the hijab squad will maul you
>>28258258
anon you don't understand. muh depression muh anxiety muh lazy cuntanitis
My Kindle came today, been reading My Twisted World on it. Rodger is a massive rich cunt and he's a poor writer but it's still an engrossing read.
>>28258219
21, i'm 25 now.
My grandma left me 5000 pounds when she died which I managed to live on for 4 years but it's run out and I had to sign on at the start of the year to pay my uncle.
i worked in a stockroom in a charity shop for 3 months but i couldn't deal with it, I kept fucking up doing things like falling asleep because i'd keep myself up all night before.
I know i'd be useless in pretty much any job.
Dole was ok till this forced working thing came up, now i'm a wreck again.
>>28258276
>I assume you have to buy the leaflets from them in the first place?
no lol
>>28258313
>I kept fucking up doing things like falling asleep because i'd keep myself up all night before.
go to bed at a normal time then lad, dont live like a neet when you have a job, it doesn't work like that
>>28258276
>I assume you have to buy the leaflets from them in the first place?
this is starting to sound like some sort of pyramid scheme
>>28258313
i just got night shift at the local ASDA, i managed to clock in and do the work for 5 hours clock out and usually never talk to anyone. I just ignored the people telling me to try harder ect and did the basics not to be fired.
>>28258280
Nah, prison is fine if you keep your head down and pay the tax.
>>28258336
Lucky. Some places you have to.
>>28258313
>My grandma left me 5000 pounds
>I kept fucking up doing things like falling asleep because i'd keep myself up all night before.
And there goes any lingering sympathy I had for you. Do the work experience, don't do it, who fucking cares. You brought this on yourself.
>>28258313
>I know i'd be useless in pretty much any job.
unless you're actually mentally retarded, I doubt this is true
wow wtf happened to this place
this place was founded by neets, piss off to brit if your a normie
>>28256688
holy f*ck are mixed race people ugly
>>28258344
I tried, literally sat in bed trying to go to sleep but i couldn't, too anxious about work.
The reason i was let go was because i fucked up showing a guy one of the expensive watches they had in a case by letting him hold it - he kinda just grabbed it out my hand and walked out.
we were not supposed to let customers hold the expensive stuff...
>>28257842
>incredibly bad in face to face social interations with people i don't know
this is false
>i'm a pathetic useless cunt with no job experience so nobody will take me on.
the second half of this is false
A few weeks of work will get you out of this shell, I did it of my own will and went to work at a school and it was hard trying to do my job with 30 kids at a time watching me, eventually I stopped giving a shit and now I'm not a shambling mess anymore. You just need a good kick up the arse to get started, but don't worry the mandatory slave labour you'll be doing soon will sort that out :)
Hey dole guy can you not get a sick not and sign onto esa?
>>28258439
wow wtf happened to this place
>>28257842
>Guess it was a mistake asking here
Just poor timing. Weekends are smug wagie hours, all the NEETs are asleep after staying up all night during the week.
Especially with aweekday off tomorrow
>>28258235
People like you deserve to stay poor if you honestly have to ask this, please use some common sense
>>28258462
But i'm not sick, at least thats what i was told last time.
>>28258313
Your options are either suicide or do the slave labour, turn to crime or do the slave labour unfortunately.
I know you have said the slave labour is out of the question but, if you are as useless as you say you are, it might actually be okay. What I mean by this is that once the people you are working for see how bad you are at working they will either stop asking you to do stuff and stop caring what you do or even try to send you back to the job center. Once you get one lot of slave labour out of the way they shouldn't be able to send you out on it again for a long while. Hopefully you can hold off any more slave labour until you get promoted from the Job Center to one of the 3rd party companies, at which point you won't get slave laboured and all you have to do to not get sanctioned is go to whatever location it is they ask you to go to then sit in a room there for a few hours, the only downside to the 3rd party companies is you have to go in much more regularly than signing on, but from what I've heard everything else is much better with them.
Or you could always go gay for pay.
>>28258502
if you can't face people you should be able to get a certain considerations
I've got told I have anxiety and depression so i don't have to work search or go to any activity's
>>28258495
lucky for me i'm not poor then
>>28258502
Can't you just throw yourself down a flight of stairs like that guy in The Wire who wants his pension so that you can get cripplebux?
>>28258565
>I've got told I have anxiety and depression so i don't have to work search or go to any activity's
This would help so much you don't even understand, I don't want a fucking free house or to scam the government, I literally just need enough to live + pay for internet.
What would be the best way to get an official note? I was pretty much my normal aspie self last time i went to GP but I got no help at all, the indian doctor just seemed to want me out of the office..
What did you do?
>>28258547
if i'm forced to go I will, but my advisor said if the people i'm sent to report to them that i didnt try hard enough i'd get sanctioned anyway ;_;
>>28258602
I can't even do a minimum wage job right and you're trusting me to not kill myself when trying to break my legs?
I don't own a phone so I wouldn't even be able to call an ambulance
>>28258664
>the indian doctor just seemed to want me out of the office..
That's because the government is encouraging doctors not to help people get on bennies.
You'll need to go to a doctor who knows you or your uncle well enough to help. It's a long process and you'll need the help of even your unlce, as they will be asking him for statements and proof of your inability to get a job too.
>>28258789
>I can't even do a minimum wage job right
You could easily handle night time cleaning jobs. There are literal retards working those.
>airi died too
noooooooooooooooooooooo noooot heeeeeeeeeer tooooooooooooooooooo
please spoiler me lads to save me from this horror anime
>>28256402
Wishing I was dead desubut then I might not see Shirobako S2 if it ever happens
>>28258664
are you on meds-this would be an indication that they are taking your case somehat seriously, despite the liberal dispense of meds thesedays...
>>28257632
This post made my afternoon. 10/10
>>28258812
>uncle, as they will be asking him for statements and proof of your inability to get a job too
No chance, my uncle isn't like real family. He literally just had a spare room in his house and was willing to let me have it for monthly money.
No way would he help me get more benefits as he hates that stuff 'fucking scroungers etc'.
i haven't been to the doctor in over a year, only time i leave the house is to go to job centre.
I'm more than willing to go and make a case but last time I tried i was ignored, just need help proving that i really am useless and depressed and bad at basically being a person
Just downloaded and am watching the first ever episode of Taggart. Guess what? There's been a muhduh. I'm getting all nostalgic.
>>28259002
>No way would he help me get more benefits as he hates that stuff 'fucking scroungers etc
You're fucked then mate. Do the work experience, it won't be as bad as you think. How long is it going to last anyway? Like 2 weeks, you'll get through that in no time.
>>28259091
>How long is it going to last anyway?
He didn't say, just called the place up and said I have to go see them next week.
I fucking know i'm going to get sanctioned and lose my benefits...
maybe I will try stealing after that, at least prison is better than homeless...
>>28259002
You sound like the living incarnation of a Pat the Bunny song
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PMyDK3VHYPw
>>28259189
They are very very rarely over 2 weeks mate. Get through it and you won't have to worry for a while before they can send you on a new one.
>>28259189
Why did your parents disown you anyway? What did you do for that to happen?
>>28259215
This.
You might even make a friend lad.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d0LeL9BUPtA
>tfw my comment wasn't original
>>28259248
I set their house on fire accidentally because I was trying to cook eggy bread but like I said I don't sleep well, so because of this I was really tired and I went for a sit down while the bread was in the pan and anyway I accidentally fell asleep then woke up to firemen kicking the door down. You'd think they have been happy that I didn't die of smoke inhalation but no they decided to disown me instead just because of the damage done to the property and apparently they never bothered to get insurance, which is hardly my fault but whatever.
>>28258812
>You'll need to go to a doctor who knows you or your uncle well enough to help. It's a long process and you'll need the help of even your unlce, as they will be asking him for statements and proof of your inability to get a job too.
You wot m8? All you have to do is ask for a sicknote (which they hand out like candy). That will get you a good 3 months or so of mandatory ESA. If you can't convince him in that time it's hopless.
>>28259310
fucking hell lad that's grim, what a pair of cunts.
could always kill yourself, imagine the look on their stupid faces
>>28259215
I have to ask, why the fuck would Tesco hire me if the job center is willing to send me to work for free or have my benefits stopped?
>>28259248
They rightly thought I was a lazy & useless sack of shit and thought disowning me would make me sort my life out.
that and, they were no longer getting money for looking after me as I was an adult so they saw me as a drain on their funds.
Not seen or spoke to them in years
>>28259310
Okay, so this whole thing was bait. What a load of bs
pls come online. Miss you tbfh
>>28259338
>that and, they were no longer getting money for looking after me as I was an adult so they saw me as a drain on their funds.
That's really sad desu lad. What kind of parents think money is more important than their own kids.
>>28259340
that wasn't me...
>>28259338
this was
>>28259368
>missing tilde
get the fuck out of here
>>28259338
>trying to takeover my story
>>28259310
This is the actual reason I ended up here, ignore the imposter...
>>28259376
Shit ones?
They raised me after all, and i'm fucking useless. Last I saw of my sister she was a massive whore also, 2nd kid by 2nd bloke now raising them alone.
>>28259002
go see a none paki doctor, whites are a lot more understanding
I just told them I couldn't handle the stress of it all and I didn't know what to do anymore
>>28259407
Sounds like the perfect family for a jezza episode.
>>28259397
i would love to see tilde all sexy dressed up for the lads though.
>>28259397
Like I'd miss that cunt
>>28259189
I left my work placement at dinner after a couple of days, I went to the doctor a day after and told them I couldn't got back and got some pills and a back dated sick note
>>28259420
My parents are (or were at least) pretty well to do to be honest. They always favoured money more t han spending time with me and my sister so it kind of makes sense that they'd value their property more than my life.
>>28259091
>2 weeks
try 2-3 months mate
>>28259189
where's the job? I seriously hope you at least chose wisely and didn't just let them put you in a store or warehouse. Also it's practically impossible to be sanctioned, for that to happen you have to turn up really late/ not at all or not do any work, you can do the work slowly and do a shit job of it but as long as you do it it's all gravy so don't sperg out too much over it
>>28259453
you're a fag poster, course you'd miss that fag
>>28259456
>I went to the doctor a day after and told them I couldn't got back and got some pills and a back dated sick note
What exactly did you say to the doctor?
i assume you went through the government website to apply for ESA?
>>28259467
>where's the job? I seriously hope you at least chose wisely and didn't just let them put you in a store or warehouse.
They didn't even ask me mate. I think it is in a warehouse as I got a text through about the location and it is that part of town. One of my problems is I also suffered polio as a child which has left one of my arms really weak, so I do not know how I am going to do warehouse work at all.
>>28259486
I miss nice guys, not mentaloids who think it's acceptable to dress up in skirts and stick their fingers down their throat 10x a day. You're confusing me for one of the prison-gay crowd
>>28259512
I'm not going to try and stop you, but why are you pretending to be me?
what's the point?
>>28259536
I find your life story funny.
>>28259536
i'm the OP...
I can't even come here for help and advice without people trying to make a mockery of me.
>>28259512
They should give you work similiar to what you told them you would be willing to do when you first signed on, it's all there on the computer, I believe you have to have 3 different types of jobwork. Tell them you don't want to and can't do warehouse but you would be more than willing to do an office job or whatever the fuck you feel comfy with
They can't force you to do these kinds of things if it doesn't lead to a job, use your brain and feed them whatever bullshit you have to
>>28259569
What are 3 good things to list?
I know warehouse is one of the ones you shouldn't list
>>28259569
Never mind apparently I was baited, this still applies to all you other doley fuckers out there
>>28259569
Meh maybe I can try but I am not very confrontational.
Is that gay for pay thing really a thing like what the other poster said? I am not very good looking but does that matter for men?
I wonder if people with Trypophobia have difficulties eating crumpets.
>>28259509
I told them i was too depressed and anxious and gave a bunch of examples and they game me a note and took it to my local jobcentre and handed it in
you get 16 weeks before you have to apply for esa where you can hand in sick notes
Anyone know of a good place to talk about this stuff? of all the places I didn't think /r9k/ would try to derail me getting help on NEET matters...
>>28259536
>>28259512
>>28259567
>>28259588
>>28259602
>all of these people impersonating me
If anyone was interested I am the real anon whose life this is.
>>28259624
The Job centre, with your careers advisor
>>28259602
throw an ad on craigslist and find out mate
>>28259584
If you want comfy just list 3 office type roles, secretary, data input, technician, business admin, shit like that. It's up to you to figure out what you wanna do lad, and you don't have to limit yourself to one specific job sector, I've been all over the place
>>28259616
Do you know how I can see a different doctor then? And do you think if I get a white doctor do you think I could tell him I have PTSD and stuff like that as well to make sure he has no choice but to give me a NEETpass?
>>28259616
Thanks for the help, i'll try this next week.
for clarification
>go doctor and basically be honest, say i'm to anxious depressed etc to work
after 16 weeks apply for ESA using the notes as proof.
How often do I go to doctors to get notes?
>>28259657
My advisor pretty much told me to my face that he's not here to help and that it was his job to get me off benefits.
>>28259624
Your options are easy, get a job or don't. What more do you want.
>>28259657
I'm dying of laughter, this is the only correct answer wannabe neet anon
>>28259686
>How often do I go to doctors to get notes?
Once, but then you'll be assessed by the ESA people who are a lot more harsh.
>>28259657
I have tried but they are not very empathetic towards me.
>>28259673
I don't know if I have enough experience for those roles though. They sound very professional.
Shit my uncle is back from the pub I might have to get off the internet because he plays LoL and gets angry if I use up the bandwith. If I stop replying that is why, but I will read the thread later for your responses so thanks in advance.
>>28259709
kaz 'neet killer' miller
>>28259693
Nobody will hire me, because i'm a fucking ugly useless autist who's a liability.
Can I be any fucking clearer?
>>28259720
>Shit my uncle is back from the pub I might have to get off the internet because he plays LoL and gets angry if I use up the bandwith. If I stop replying that is why, but I will read the thread later for your responses so thanks in advance.
Oh my god it's poleaboo
>>28259715
Wouldn't want to be that anon when he tries to get a note for his crippling shyness. He's gonna get ripped a new one
>>28259729
Kaz "On the dole? throw em in a hole" Miller
Nevermind lads my uncle has gone back out, he must have just had to come pick something up.
>>28259738
>>28259715
What is the difference in the assessments?
>>28259761
that one was better than mine lad
>>28259774
One is 'here is a sick note, get out'. The other is looking for any excuse to deny you esa and declare you fit for work.
>turn lamp on
>too bright
>turn lamp off
>not dark enough
Death to summer.
>>28259801
>There are legit crippled people who can't get an esa
>neetaboo thinks he stands a chance
O I am laffin
This fucking thread, since when did /r9k/ turn on itself?
Now we have pathetic feelfags making fun of an even more pathetic autist who's parents abandoned him kek.
>>28259732
You need to learn to start taking some responsibility for your life. It's bad fucking enough that you burnt your parents house down due to sheer laziness, but then to act like you're the one wronged when they throw you out to the street, only for your uncle to be kind enough to give you a chance to get back on your feet, and all you want to do is sit around on 4chan.
It's time to grow the fuck up mate.
>>28259720
try asking to be a janitor, that seems to be your skill level
>>28259831
It is what it is m8
>>28259833
nothing gets a robot's jollies off more than taking a holier-than-thou stance on a neetabo, it distracts him from his own pathetic existence.
>>28259869
This.
I suspect a lot of people feel better about their lives when they read that anons story. It's sad really, he's more robot than 90% of them.
>>28259780
I live for the miller memes, it comes as naturally as bane posting
>>28259853
>THE STRONG
>/r9k/
Bahahaha the fucking toffs were right, stirr up animosity between the poor & thick and they'll do all the work of oppressing themselves.
>>28259926
The relatively strong, that is
>>28259833
This post gave me an idea for a verse, why don't you take it and become a rap star anon? That will pay the bills
At home on the dole because I can't get hired
Fall asleep by the stove and I start a fire
Parents are mad I was never in the choir
So they say anon, we've had enough of your cheek
Pack your backs because you're out on the street
My Uncle took me in to get me back on my feet
But all I want to do is sit at home and be NEET
I go to the job center every 2 weeks
My life is like a video on repeat
Then one day I got some news that made me wanna shriek
Slave labour was my sentence just to make ends mee
But I turned them right around and put my job seekers down
Quiet and shy? It's time to make some sound
I'm in the rap game now I'm big underground
From 100 quid a week to 1 million pounds
BRAP BRAP BRAP NEETANON MOTHERFUCKER YEA GET TA KNOW NEETANON NEETANON BIIIITCH
>>28259895
>MY LIFE IS SO SHIT
>literally only problem in life for most people in /r9k/ is that they can't act like a normal human around women.
If you're still here dole anon good luck with your life, try finding one of those lefty group that actually give a shit about people like you.
>>28259895
>I suspect a lot of people feel better about their lives when they read that anons story
He burnt his parents house down making a simple fucking meal of course we're going to feel superior to him.
>>28260023
That wasn't him you retard.
>>28259732
It's Sunday. It's full of normies off work/school
Best to post during the daytime when they've all fucked off again
>>28260023
that was the ebin memester, couldn't you tell by the blatant 'eggy bread' line?
>>28260058
This.
Anon who lives with his uncle, it might be better if you ask for this kind of advice on a weekday. Not tomorrow though, it's bank holiday. Try asking again on tuesday at around 2pm.
>>28260058
is there anything more pathetic than wagie normies who spend their FREE TIME on the weekends on fucking /r9k/?
anything to distract from the monotomy and self hatred I guess.
>>28260070
>implying French toast isn't a delicious and nutritious breakfast option
I don't blame the anon desu. I too would walk through fire for delicious eggy bread'
Got 5 hours worth of shit to do today lads and haven't even started any of it. Have to br up early tomorrow too. Fuck.
>>28260070
>>28260036
I'm pretty sure eggy bread guy was the real anon and then a second anon began impersonating him and spun it off into a different story.
>>28260100
Think he's gone anon, don't he's gonna come back after that roasting keke
one less oxygen thief to ruin my comfy /britfeel/ threads.
>>28260129
>firemen kick down door
>neetanon escorted out of the house
>"NO, MY EGGY BREAD"
>forces his way through the firemen trying to put out his eggy bread
>house burns down, no insurance but fuck yes eggy bread
No wonder his uncle is wary of him
>>28260161
I know that feel mate, I have to go to the shop to buy booze but I haven't even managed to get dressed yet.
>>28255560
Slav moving to Swansea in September to study, what should i expect lads?
>>28259310
>I set their house on fire accidentally because I was trying to cook eggy bread but like I said I don't sleep well, so because of this I was really tired and I went for a sit down while the bread was in the pan and anyway I accidentally fell asleep then woke up to firemen kicking the door down.
>>28260204
See this is what defines a real robot, bone idleness and self-inflicted alcoholism.
Nothing as serious as being abandoned by your own fucking parents and looming homelessness.
I should stop fucking browsing this board in weekends but it's become habit.
>>28260195
Kek
His parents can't go out to breakfast anymore because they're haunted by the smell of frying eggy bread.
>>28259288
Nice to see Moz posting is still going, I've been too lazy to routinely post in threads
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Igg_2ZqyMzQ
My fav live moz performance
I LlVE FOR THIS SHIT
>>28260294
HAHAHA every time they do to make an omelette they have Vietnam style flashbacks KEK
>>28260250
I bet you have a job you fucking norman
social ineptitude and anxiety are habits and can be unlearned through immersion
don't kill yourself dummy
>>28260341
Yep, but I don't work - co-owner of a family business that runs itself and I can't be ousted by law.
Spend most my time wasting the profits earned by my brother and the wage slaves under him lel.
>>28260401
>im a real robot guys
>>28260415
i'm not a pathetic wretch like you if that's what you're getting at.
Threads like this are fun to me.
>>28259962
Ay yo, ight
This is the real NEETanon and I'm just here to say
I need more details about gay for pay
I don't think it's wrong, it's not in a gay way
but some motherfuckers need to get paid
some faggots out there need to get laid
Which is ironically
What you'll be doing on the floor if you step to me
120 pounds and only 5 foot 3
But that first number is how many chin ups I can do in a week
And tears will be running down your cheek
If you continue to impersonate me
Of course you wish you were me
But the fact i'll snap your neck, crack my knuckles and pop your skull open
like I'm fucking rice crispies
Just come to my uncle's house if you want to diss me
But let me warn you if you do it is more than risky
i'm the eggy bread arsonist livin' cheap and nifty
The shades of grey on your corpse will be more than fifty
And if any clowns try to spit back just know you'll never hit me
Real NEETanon up in this bitch
fuck da haters
Job Center 2k16 yea
get ta know
>>28260415
It's the weekend lad. It's normal. Normie posting does down on weekdays
>>28260450
Agreed. Fucking virgins here crying about their sad lives when it's all there fault anyway. 'Waaaa my uncle gon kick me out if i hab no money wat do' Get a job you fucking retard.
>tfw graduating in two months doing a degree you only kind of enjoy purely because coding has good job prospects
>tfw gotten away with doing fuck all with my life this entire time and now I have to figure out what I want to really do and I have no idea because there's many things I want to get done that are all dramatically different from one another
>tfw had periods of being genuinely happy but generally feel as if something is always missing
>tfw starting to see an american grill you're really getting along with but she's leaving for the US in June
>tfw never had much luck with women and although things feel like they're going well for once even if they continue to go well she'll disappear off there and has spent most of her life travelling the world and will likely continue doing it whilst you're stuck in London with no real way of seeing her save for working up to getting a US job (which will take years) or saving up to travel (which will take at least *a* year) and things will likely end up fucked one way or another and you have no other options right now
>tfw not looking forward to a lifetime of mediocrity and don't know how to escape
might as well die ennit
Normie posting is a bit crazy today. Going to get off britfeel for the rest of the day. See ya lads, don't stay up too late.
>>28260489
Glad to see someone else here who's not a fucking waste of space. How you spending your afternoon lad?
>>28260392
clearly you don't have it
>>28260543
not anymore but i had it worse than most
>>28260539
I got some new animu figures in the post today so I need to rearrange my figures case this evening then I'll probably watch a bit of Question Time on BBC iplayer as a treat before heading off for an early night. Need to be up early tomorrow as well.
>>28260539
>>28260489
Why the fuck are you here?
it's like walking into a fucking AA meeting and making fun of all the addicts.
How sad must YOUR life be if that's fun times for you.
anyone here build model kits?
i used to do it when i was younger and i'm thinking about getting back into it
>>28260576
neurally encoded behaviour is more than just a "habit" that can be dropped
>>28260577
>I got some new animu figures in the post today
Forget I asked, you're even more worthless than the others. Nothing is more sad than a grown man collecting dolls of children cartoons.
Guessing you're a virgin.
>>28260539
Not much today mate. The mrs is having a kip as she had work today. She'll be up soon and i'll spend the evening with her. Might go down to the pub with her tonight seeing as we both have tomorrow off.
What are you up to tonight lad?
>>28260628
not with that defeatist mentality
>>28260636
Bit mardy at the 1-1 result as I had a fiver on Leicester.
Got a torrent of the F1 downloading so i'll probably watch that then Game of Thrones with the family.
>>28260543
What he is saying is true
I used to be shy and scared of people and would get picked on and shit until I got tired of it so when I was about 15 I decided to be like my hero Stone Cold Steve Austin. I started drinking beer and smoking and getting into fights with people who tried to bully me then it became that other people were scared of me and not the other way around. Of course still no one liked me. But once I left that group of people and moved on in life I managed to use my new found confidence as a force of good and now I can talk to anybody and make people laugh and I regularly hang out with varied groups of people to whom I would be considered a friend. All of those people would never believe I was ever shy or quiet.
I'm also an alcoholic and I still want to kill myself days though, so it is a double edged sword.
>>28260684
nobody cares about your life story autist.
>>28260655
that's fact lil brah..
I have just been sick again. Think I will try not to do it tomorrow desu. The toothbrush bristles are making my throat bleed~
>>28260539
wanking over anime and posting korean popstars in the int /brit/
>>28260720
I said >NOT< a waste of space.
>>28260702
That's what would happen to you if we met in person mate.
>>28260677
Sounds good lad. I completely forgot about GoT today. Watched last weeks, pretty good desu. Although I've missed loads of episodes so have no idea if the thing withthe red woman transforming at the endwas meant to be a big deal or not. The mrs had no idea either but she's seen less episodes than me.
>>28257627
You can't, grit your teeth and get on with it. It might help you get a proper job anyway. If anything, getting out of the attitude that it's okay to sit on your arse all day is always a good start towards getting off the dole.
>>28260771
>replying to this post an hour after the whole sage ended
mate
>>28260745
This is you right now anon.
Nobody cares about your sob story.
>>28260712
inherited or habitual it can still be unlearned. it's not like being born with shit eyesight or deafness
>>28260745
Don't watch wrestling but that seems like a weird way to fall back. Why does he literally jump up like that before falling?
>>28258123
I've got depression and schizophrenia and still work. What's your excuse?
>>28260801
Because it's more entertaining than just falling
>>28260800
>it's not like being born with shit eyesight
I was born with shit eyesight and got laser corrective surgery, sorted this shit right out.
Your analogy is shit.
>>28260801
It's called 'selling' and it is done make the move and the opponent look more powerful.
>>28258313
>"I kept fucking up doing things like falling asleep because i'd keep myself up all night before."
Answer then is to not keep fucking up and staying up all night when you've got shit to do in the morning. Fucking hell, I figured that shit out by the time I was 15. I start to see now why the boomers look down on us younger generations as being fucking useless.
>>28260801
BECAUSE WRESTLING IS FAKE AS SHIT.
Literally soap operas for autistic men.
>i'm not a pathetic wretch like you if that's what you're getting at.
>Threads like this are fun to a gentleman like me
>>28260684
>when I was about 15 I decided to be like my hero Stone Cold Steve Austin
well it's cool that you went skitzo so early and it helped you, but I didn't yet
>>28260849
did you unlearn your poor eyesight on your own or was it cured by a doctor?
>>28260874
mate, that guy left ages ago...
>>28260905
There are trained doctors that can make yoiu unlearn your socially retarded ways, they're called psychiatrists.
As I said, your analogy is shit.
>>28260799
You can sit there with your little keyboard, and your little jpg images and bash away on 4chan with your little spindly girl fingers all you want. The fact is that the day me and you see each other in the ring, or at the bar, or at the doctor's office, or in the street, it doesn't matter, all that matters is that I'm gunna stomp a mudhole in your sorry ass... AND THAT'S THE BOTTOM LINE BECAUSE STONE COLD SAID SO
*SMASH*
DUH DUH NUH NUH NUH NUH NUH DA DA DA
>>28260943
your comprehension of my analogy is what's shit breh
Poleaboo used the hair removal cream
It was only meant to be used on the body but he used it on his genital area and ass too
It worked perfectly
I highly recommend it (used Nad's brand) to everyone, even those who aren't sissies
>>28260886
>tfw used to think it was real when I was at secondary school
Even had a proper heated argument with my friend about it too back then. I cringe thinking about it now.
Rate my din dins lads. Going to have a full belly tonight
>>28260959
what is it about wrestling that attracts the fucking spergs?
I knew a kid in school that wouldn't shut the fuck up about WWF or whatever, he always stank of shit.
>>28260988
>mash potatoes and fish fingers
>on a Sunday
I would smack your mum around the head if I was you mate.
>>28260988
did mommy make it for you?
>>28260745
Ahahaaaha! A keyboard warrior. Brilliant.
>>28260459
>>28259962
These are fucking gold, this and eggy bread posting are slaying my sides thank you anons
>>28260796
Meh, didn't read the times and only just finished work so sue me.
>>28261005
WHHAAAAAAAAAAT?!?
>>28260908
*sobs* just realised after some other anon pointed it out. Boo, I wanted my Jeremy Kyle "GET A JOB" moment in the sun. Oh well.
>>28260988
Fuck me, that looks like a depressing meal. Quality not fucking quantity bruv.
>>28255560
Haven't been around these parts in a while, but your OP images are much better now. That's a work of art.
>>28261068
Ahhh another normie wagecuck.
So many chavs, what the fuck happened to /britfeel/?
Do you think David Cameron's son will ever be deemed fit to work?
>>28261157
There's not even that many chavs posting. I mean, real chavs are illiterate so would have a bit of a problem posting here in the first place, but there is often quite a few fake chavs here who argue that Super Dry and Rebok are acceptable and styling clothing for adults, but they have autism so they can't really help it.
>>28261151
Yup, tick me off the list already. I've got a GF and my own car too if that helps.
>>28261165
Imagine using your crippled kid for political points
What a cunt
>>28261065
I want one of the flats in the OP image to have NEETanon falling asleep while his eggy bread lights on fire
I can't Photoshop unfortunately.
>>28261214
lower middle class fake chavs who try to emulate the actual chavs of the working class because they have no peer group.
I know the type, incredibly pathetic, just like the 'wigger' phenomenon you see from white people growing up in Detroit etc.
>>28261297
I want a demolition man poster put up
>>28261247
may I ask, why are you here?
>>28261157
What? Chavs? Where? What posts are 'chav posts'?
>>28261297
>I want one of the flats in the OP image to
then do it yourse...
>I can't Photoshop unfortunately.
Too fucking bad then.
>>28261294
What else can he do with him? Useless if he can't score some points with him.
>>28261360
That was a really witty reply mate, have a (you).
>>28261381
Obviously annoyed you as you responded lad.
Fuck sake lads, can't believe it is gone 8 and I still haven't even had a shower yet. I was hoping to be home from beer shopping and half drunk by now. Will go for a shower now and hope my mum will give me a lfit to Tesco as it is too dangerous to walk at night.
>>28261360
what a good post mate and by a good post mate i mean a shit post you twat
>>28261014
>>28261033
Made this all on my own like a big boy, I don't live with mummy.
>>28261131
I also had another two servings of mash after. It's tasty so I consider it quality+quantity together
>>28261408
You're obviously annoyed because you responded, lad.
>>28261414
Same lad. I still have 5 hours worth of shit to do and still sat here eating chocolate buttons.
>>28261334
Because my friend, there was a time many years ago, when I was kissless virgin and had no fucking idea where I was going in life and found this place to be a decent place to hang out. Skip forward years later, I'm now in a 4 year relationship, have a job, a car, a flat and things are generally looking up - but, and I say but, I still consider myself to be a bit of a fuckup and always have and hence still slightly relate to people here. Plus I like it here and occasionally like giving my opinion and shit that really doesn't matter.
So yeah. Long explanation and I know, I know, ree get out normie etc. But I thought I'd be honest.
>>28261448
Not who you're responding to but I'm annoyed that nobody responded to me lad. Please act respondingly.
>>28261294
If he doesn't appear in public with him he'll be accused of being embarrassed of his crippled son. If he does, he's accused of using him as a PR tool.
>>28261436
Another two servings of mash??? You're an utter madman! I bet your farts smell delicious tomorrow though. Make sure you waft them in other people's general direction.
>>28261520
He should put him up for adoption.
>>28261340
Innit blud, wanna play some coins? I'll ave you n your mum mate. Stay down with dat bruvva.
>kills self.
>>28261520
>he'll be accused of being embarrassed of his crippled son
What a load of bollocks
Talk about getting it wrong...
Fuck me, you're all a bunch of twats
>>28261591
I'm unemployed but I never wear trackies.
Been knocking back those 5 quid isla negro Merlots by the bottle this weekend
>>28260988
fucking grim mate, you could have spent those calories and carbs so much better
So lads, gf is away for the week and I've been chatting with some cute asian cd I found on craigslist. Both of us are interested in meeting. Should I do it?
>>28261708
it's like I don't even know this board anymore...
>>28261708
Dump your GF for the asian cd
>>28261708
Nope don't be a silly cunt. The way I see it is that if you're unhappy enough with your relationship to cheat, then end the fucking relationship first and THEN get with another bird. Don't cheat like some thick chavy cunt.
>>28261571
You can't see that happening? Some twat on the guardian certainly would have come out and started talking about ableism and all that nonsence
Watching old xfiles taped off spike.
>>28261708
>cr-eggs list
naff off yankeedoodle
>>28261731
Cry me a fucking river robot. It's our board now.
>>28261624
I'm unemployed and never wear anything but boxers and a dressing gown
Poleaboo went to Arizonas to get dinner
Went for a half pounder burger meal, fancied trying something new and it was the same price as the chicken burger meal
The guys working there called me "brother" but the language they were speaking wasn't paki
Think they were Iranian or Kurdish
Further confusion ensued when a WHITE guy walked in and called them brother and started speaking in the same language
>>28261750
Tbh something needs to change in our relationship, but the only reason I want to fuck a fem boy is to get the itch out of my system.
>>28261773
CL London is pretty active m8
>>28261539
>>28261686
But I'm bulking, aiming for 3000 calories a day. SIck of being this small and thin tbqh ;_:
>>28261826
bulking != getting fat
>>28261816
Call it what you like, being a tosser is being a tosser.
Do your bird the curtsey of dumping her before you cheat.
>>28261816
Sounds iffy mate. I can understand you now wanting to drop the entire relationship, but if you give into that itch then possibly you get found out, but even if you don't then you're going to feel like an utter cunt for as long as the relationship lasts. Unless you don't, in which case like I said before, it's probably not a very good relationship in that case. I could never cheat on my missus of nearly 5 years, I find myself looking at different birds sometimes out of curiosity, but I could never go behind her back like that, it'd kill me betraying her like that and she means too damn much to me to ever risk hurting her.
>>28261708
do you love your gf? or not that bothered?
>>28261826
Ah fair enough lad. Bit of advice though, go for shit loads of chicken and eggs. Heavy in protein so at least you're bulking up on the good shit. Good luck! I'm the opposite, I weigh 20 stone (used to be 23) and I'm still losing. Got a long way to go yet lol.
>>28261930
Fuck me, you better be like 6'3
20 stone is disgusting...
>>28261731
we /normie/ now
back to wiz chan virgin scum
>>28260988
what anime you watching mate
>>28261879
Guess you got your feelings hurt in the past
>>28261891
Yeah desu I've had these almost-encounters before and then decided not to go. I have the same feeling this time too. My GF means a lot to me but I'm notorious for thinking with my dick, however since I've been with her my feelings for her have trumped sexual urge. I cheated on her once before and I felt like shit. I told her about it eventually - she wasn't happy but kinda accepted it, since it was in the very early stages of our relationship, which had started purely from sex and attraction. Just came here for some other opinions i guess.
>>28261798
Mate, eat something other than takeaways for once in your life.
>>28261962
Nah 5'10 and yes, yes I know. It's disgusting, hence the fact I've lost 3 stone and still have about 6 to go. Not all of us are perfect mate. ;)
>>28261909
>love
I'm not a fag lad.
>>28261995
I only get takeaways two or three times a week
>Interest paid into bank on the 1st of every month
>No interest paid today
is it because it's a weekend/ bank holiday or something?
>>28262012
I'm the same heigh as you, 15,7 stone and my doctor said i'm obese.
I dread to think what you looked like at 23 stone.
>>28261983
>but I'm notorious for thinking with my dick
In all fairness bud. We've all been there. Still don't condone cheating but I can understand it on a basic way nonetheless. Tbh you sound like you've got your shit together for the most part and understand that you need to put the relationship first or bail. Choice is yours basically. Good luck either way.
>>28257842
If a fat useless ex-4 years-a-neet can manage to get his foot through the door, so can you.
Note: I'm still very fat
>>28262035
>Interest
>getting into debt
What the fuck were you thinking?
>>28262019
This anon is not me (>>28261983 , >>28261816 )
>>28262028
It should be once a week max.
>>28262073
What are you on about lad?
It's for my savings accounts
>>28262028
kek mate, that's way too much
>>28262047
Fucking horrible to be honest mate. I carry my weight pretty decently (got my GF when I was 16.5 stone) but then I lost my job, was stressed about money all the time and put on about 7 stone over the space of 2 years. That was about 2 years ago and then I got a new job, stopped having money worries and started sorting my shit out. Like I say, I'm losing slowly but surely, but at least it's going thank God.
>>28262081
Poleaboo was doing that, sometimes once a fortnight
It's just a recent thing, like buying the sissy clothes, just wanting to spend money
>>28262073
>not getting into debt
literal child
You don't understand basic personal finance or economics
>>28262062
I don't know if I fully have my shit together. I want this relationship to work, but I always burn through relationships quickly, or go and look for sex and excitement elsewhere. I've been with this girl longer than any other and now we live together - none of this was planned, I just kinda went with it. It takes so much self control to really give yourself to a relationship..
>>28262028
>only
m8...
>>28261849
Nah mate. Gone from 172cm, 54 kg to 60 kg and I'm still way too thin. A kilo or two a month plus the gym means I'm very far from being fat
>>28261930
Cheers :) chicken is actually ideal for people like you trying to lose weight because of how low it is in calories and high in protein, though I still eat a lot of it.
How tall are you? 20 stone is a lot but if you were able to lose 3 stone you can do it! Keep in mind it does get more difficult the more you lose, but if you're on top of your diet you'll manage. All the best to you too
>>28262140
>>28262114
It could be much worse
Besides, if we're counting calories, it's just a substitute for a homemade dinner and fills the deficit created by a light lunch
>>28261591
Not our fault we can cook eggy bread correctly m8
>>28261983
some girls like you cheating on them if you come back to them in the end
means you're desirable to other people and all women care about it being better than other people anyway
>>28262130
I know what you mean. Before I met my GF of over 4 years now, I was saving up and had plans for working in South Korea as foreign language teacher earning some decent money. Now I've got with her and settled down (quite quickly I might add) in a flat and shit and got back to working a pretty shitty retail job, I get the occasional "oh shit what have I done" feel. But then I remember all the good times with her and it makes it easier. I think I understand now what my grandad said when he told me years ago that life was about balancing choices! All I need now are kids and my path down the family guy route will be complete.
>>28262166
>focussing on calories
>ignoring all the sodium, e-numbers, fat and sugar
>>28261972
Steins;Gate.
I'm new to anime, only seen Cowboy Bebop, Death Note, AoT and One Punch Man. Still going through the entry level stuff I guess, got Code Geass lined up for afterwards. Any more you can recommend?
>>28262162
Thanks dude! I'm 5'10. Yeah it's not easy, less so now I'm getting older I've noticed, but it's got to be done. All the best to yourself as well.
>>28262127
>just wanting to spend money
There are a lot better ways to spend money than fast food. Once a week should be your goal for fast food. Never any more.
>>28257173
1958 i'd say my ol chap
>>28262099
It will go in on Tuesday you silly goose. If the 1st falls on a Sunday or bank holiday it is the next working day it will be paid.
t someone who works at a bank
>>28262217
>got back to working a pretty shitty retail job
Definitely gonna haunt you down the line.
Fly, you fool
>>28262166
>Besides, if we're counting calories
Not how it works. Yes it's important a donner is a lot more unhealthy than say a proper home cooked meal.
>>28262099
I have 2 grand sitting in a bog standard cash account.
How does savings work? if it's a decent return i'll look into it but this 0.1% per year stuff can fucking jog on.
>>28262259
Thank you kind anon mute blox :)
What's working in a ban like?
>>28262225
Poleaboo says don't watch Code Gayass or Cowboy Bebop
Watch Madoka
here are his other recs
http://myanimelist.net/animelist/Straight_Pride?status=7&order=4&tag=
>>28262222
oh, fuck
I thought I could lose weight if I just reduced my calorie intake
>>28262255
Right, I'll completely cut out takeaways now
>>28262222
>avoiding fat
>not getting on a Ketogenic diet
Do you even want to be lean?
>>28262301
If you don't want to actually "do" anything with your money, safety net is to just open a Help To Buy ISA with Santander.
4% interest and if in the next few years you decide you want to buy a house, govt. will give you 25% of your savings (up to 3k bonus) as help towards your deposit.
If you close the account you have 12 months to claim the bonus, but are under no obligation to use it. So worst case scenario you've got a decent interest rate while you decide on how to use the money more effectively.
>>28262272
It does sometimes, but despite my shitty media degree (WHAT THE FUCK WAS I THINKING? ARRRRGGG) It's pretty much the only work I can get due to experience etc.
Oh well. Pays the bills and it's not completely god-awful all the time, especially when the manageress isn't there and we can all chill out a little bit.
>>28262207
Yeah I know what you mean, but this girl isn't at all insecure like that. If I cheated on her again she'd be mighty pissed and would almost certainly leave me.
>>28262217
Thats nice m8, you have something really sweet going. I moved in with my GF when I finished uni and she had a job in London (she's 1 year older than me). I've managed to find something here too but I'm working 6 days a week and I'm not happy with it. I've since found a superb job in a company in Bristol, signed the contract and I'll be starting in September. I couldn't stay here just for her, as every other aspect of my life in this city is bad. She's gonna try and start looking for jobs in Bristol for December but wants to make a solid 18 months minimum in this company, which I agree is the best move. Kinda feel bad for her as her whole life is back in Spain and the only reason she's here is to be with me, and I can't even commit to being in a specific city for her.
>>28262318
I find it ironic that your name is straight pride since you dress up in sissy gear.
Wooeeeooh I'ma fucking subhuman piece of shit kill me wooeeeeeeooooooooooooo
>>28262301
I put 200 pound a month into a Help to Buy ISA, it's capped at 200 max a month but you can start with 1200 and it's free to withdraw at any time with no penalties.
No matter what you do guaranteed 4% interest.
Then I have a savings account which is 1.5% aslong as the balance in it grows by 100 pound each month, if there's a month it shrinks I get 0.1% but they're instant access so I'm alright.
Definitely get a help to buy.
>>28262381
What's wrong senfam?
>>28262362
Chose the name after watching "Bruno", did it ironically
>>28256760
Karen is a cute, but i dont respect her as you don't tend to look up to autistic hyperactive children. No this is not an accurate representation of a British loli, the same way Jappo lolis aren't accurate, fugboi
>>28262413
If he wanted to kill himself he would. He's looking for you's lad, nothing more.
>>28262413
i am subhuman who was CUT at birth, pls kill me. i go take dxm now bye bye
>>28262316
>What's working in a ban like?
Depends on the bank I suppose, mine is piece of piss because it is so quiet. I just hang out and browse the internet all day and chat to the regulars when they come in. It is a customer facing role where I open accounts for people but some days we might not even have one person come to open an account so like I said it is really easy.
It is a bit boring now though because all of my friend's and the manager left and now I've got a bunch of middle aged PC women who won't play cards at the desk with me and apparently it is no longer acceptable to come in hungover then sleep it off in the storage cupboard as it was under the old regime.
>>28255632
This guy my g0d
>>28262318
you can technically but you won't do it through takeaways you stupid cunt jesus christ
>>28262333
there's eating fat and then there's gorging on it
>>28262384
fucking lloyds who my cash account is with only offering 2% on help to buy..
Do I really have to go to santander for 4%?
>>28262452
Don't forget the thuggerthuggerthuggerthugger part.
>>28262477
Them or IIRC Halifax have a decent rate too but there's some kind of catch.
>>28262453
Sounds mega comfy lad, how much do you get paid?
Is it easy to get into?
I work in politics and I get paid fuck all and it's intense stress and loads of work so thinking of finding something else.
>>28262477
2% is still really good for an instant access account that doesn't need a minimum top up and can be used to claim free money if you buy a house
>>28262477
what's wrong with going santander?
it's double the interest lad I wouldn't turn my nose up
>>28262593
Santander are dodgy as fuck. But they got me with their 4% lure too
Anyone got that infographic on killing yourself?
>>28262593
Just more of a headache than opening the ISA online via lloyds.
I'll think about switching banks.
>>28262643
gotcha fampai
>tfw want to go for a drive with someone
>>28261475
We can all make it eventually, truly this man being here is an inspiration to us all
who /stubbies/ here?
>2.5l of beer for less than 4 quid
>tastes like any other lager
>goes cold in the fridge quick
>drink them so quickly they don't go warm
>dat feeling of rinsing your way through 10 beers and only being normally drunk
fucking god mode lads
>>28262659
thanks anon, see you in the next life
>>28262514
>Sounds mega comfy lad
It was for sure but like I said I'm not sure how much longer it will remain comfy for with this new regime in place. We used to say and do so much stuff that HR would sack you almost instantly over and I am the only person left from that crowd with a new bunch of straight laced PC women so I wouldn't be surprised if one of them takes real offense to me sooner or later because in my mind they have come into my branch so they should accept my customs and not force theirs upon me. I'm not a Native American.
>how much do you get paid?
Not a lot, it is treated as a bog standard customer service job. It works out about 20k a year with an annual bonus which ranges from 10-15 percent of your yearly pay.
>Is it easy to get into?
Like I said it is treated pretty much as bog standard customer service so if you've got the personality for it it is easy.Don't need any qualifications.
Are you the kiddie who bullshitted his way into the job and has just been making it up as you go along? How's that working out for you?
>>28262318
If you don't like Cowboy Bebop then how can I trust your other recommendations? That show was really good.
It's probably going to be some loli shit anyway, but I'll try it to see what I'm in for
>>28262663
>looking up too normie cunts
I hate weekends on britfeel.
>>28262225
nhk was first one i watched
>meet girl on tinder
>she lives nearby, can walk to hers in 15 minutes
>we hit it off, sex on the first meet
>regularly meet her for a bone
>checking facebook today
>she's requested a relationship change for us
>she's going around telling everyone she's my girlfriend
>this is not the arrangement we had, it was just casual sex
>don't know what to do
Is there any way to get out of this but still keep the fwb relationship? She's not good looking enough to want to take out in public like on a date, but she is good in bed.
>>28261414
>He gives a shit about being mugged at night
I had to walk for an hour to get home through acocks green at 11pm last night, shopping bags packed jam packed. Man up lad, don't cross the street when you see a gang coming your way and you might not get targeted
>>28262681
Cowboy Bebop is episodic shit
I like shows with an actual plot
Madoka is literally the greatest show of possibly all time, literally perfect
>>28262702
fuck off normie
origiblox 12345
>>28262702
Tell her that men are not vending machines where you put sex in and get relationships out
>>28262669
Those beers are legendary. I shill the fuck out of them at Tesco. 3.69 for that much booze and tastes far better than Carling or Carlsberg or Fosters.
>>28262658
No.
You don't switch, you just open the Santander ISA and then set up a standing order to transfer money from your Lloyds current account into the ISA
>>28262702
talk to her about it and not /r9k/ you dumbfuck
>>28262702
yeah, dont use facebook. old school secrecy.
or you could just tell her straight up that you have other sex partners and don't want something serious.
>>28262682
I was taking the piss lad, it's not hard to become a normie
>>28262713
>don't cross the street when you see a gang coming your way and you might not get targeted
I'm not an idiot mate. I walk straight through them so they think I'm a nutter.
>>28262672
it's not painless or fast btw
it can leave you severely disabled
>>28261708
what's a cd, some sort of trap? Either way if you don't care about your gf go for it mate
>>28262721
you are the minority here. Fuck off to wiz chan
>>28262772
Yes it is painless
Drinking beer and playing some tunes on the 6 string lads
Colin hay will be the death of me
>>28262772
incorrect, https://www.vice.com/en_uk/read/the-internet-is-telling-people-how-to-kill-themselves
>>28262730
Mate you and me both. Whenever I want beer, I default to them. Literally nothing else comes close in terms of taste and value.
On a side note, brewed 50l of beer this month. Hopefully it won't taste like bottled ass water
>>28262786
Shit I just figured it out, cross dresser. Boy do I feel like a plonker
>>28262798
>Colin hay
more likely to be AIDS
>>28262817
Colin hay is God tier feels music anon
>>28262794
>>28262805
i was just trying to stop someone from killing themselves
thanks
>>28262840
Fuck that. Let him kill himself, who even cares.
>>28262840
fuck off anon it's my choice
>>28262786
Crossdresser. Little Asian boy who puts on a wig, makeup, fishnets, panties and a dress. Has a filthy mind and is into all sorts of kink. Would be a legendary fuck puppet but he wants bareback and there is literally no way I'm going to BB a guy on my first encounter with him. Literally a recipe for cockrot.
>>28262840
Who put you in charge of suicide prevention?
>>28262840
By discouraging this method, you are encouraging another more painful, more risky method
You are doing more harm than good
>>28262870
Yeah no lad, don't BB him ever. He most certainly gets around.
>>28262883
the samaritans senpai. we monitor this thread 24 hours a day in 12 hour shifts
>>28262891
Wouldn't be surprised if he's one of those weird ones that wants to catch aids. Poz or whatever the fuck they call it.
>>28262891
I wouldn't even if I met him. I have a male rape fantasy and if he resisted the idea of me wearing a rubber, I'd force him into it. I doubt there'd be any legal repercussions desu
>>28262901
There's more than 1 Samaritan now?
Ben Linus won't be best pleased
>see guy and some girl walking behind me
>they start to shout shit at me
why are people so fucking horrible
>>28262891
>mfw he just messaged me again on kik
>>28262932
desu the way he talks and the effort he's putting into this one encounter with me makes me think he's looking for a bf. he flat out told me that I sounded like great bf material and 'joked' about me leaving my gf for him
>>28262959
That's how you impress girls, by showing how macho you are.
Should have knocked the cunt out.
Lads how do I make real 3d friends. I've tried using okcupid, craigslist, facebook and all that normie shit but nothing ever comes from it, and the two times it did they had some real fucked up mental issues. After 4 years of being happy being a hermit the loneliness is finally starting to fuck me up a bit, the videogames do nothing for me, feels like my mind is slipping I don't know what the fuck to do
>>28262593
>>28262541
On second though I think I could probably make more investing the money into something else. it's only an extra 100 per year via interest.
>>28263012
>desu the way he talks and the effort he's putting into this one encounter with me makes me think he's looking for a bf. he flat out told me that I sounded like great bf material and 'joked' about me leaving my gf for him
There are gays who get off on the idea of having the guys leave their gf for them. Honestly mate, block him on kik. If you're happy with your gf why bother.
>>28262959
lol wat
where are you? what did you look like? what did they say?
>>28263041
Most people make friends from work/school. Do you go to any of those? Outside of that it's very hard.
>>28263050
was on a sunday stroll
i''m extremely skinny, pale as fuck, and i wear a long wool coat
they were shouting random names and "EY YOU"
>>28263084
Hide in the next bush and then jump out and murder them.
>>28263045
True. The only reason I've humoured him thus far is that I'm still entertaining the idea of administering a hot beef injection. I used to go on penpalworld as a kid for sex chat with foreigners and since then I've always had the horn for kinky chat with random people. Once that gets boring I'll most likely just block him
>>28263084
Where the fuck do you live for that to happen?
>>28262681
>>28262718
Poleaboo is a broken clock and even though his taste is all around shit, he is right about madoka. It's a great show, critically and popularly acclaimed, definitely worth a watch. See it soon and do your best to avoid spoilers beforehand.
>>28263084
Should have just turned around and asked them what the fuck do they want. Don't make the mistake of thinking they were picking on you for any specific reason. Probably just drunk and being idiots.
>>28263132
I googled it and some some loli shit. What the fuck
>tfw you thought the other Louise Theroux documentary would be on tonight but it isn't.
>>28263084
Sounds like he was trying to invite you to have sex with his missus while he watched.
So lads I have the biggest hard on for young Natalie Portman in Leon: The Professional.
Does this make me a degenerate paedo?
>>28263224
Yes
To further expand and please our robot overlord - it's also a shit film.
>>28263167
I don't want to give a lot away but the art direction and the tone/narrative are deliberately rather at odds. Just give it a go lad.
>didn't buy enough beer to pass out with
Fuck me lads it's going to be a long night
>>28263224
No, that's the best she's ever looked and from a biological perspective the most fertile she's been.
It's completely normal.
>>28261909
>>28261741
>>28262786
>>28262207
>>28262217
>>28262891
>>28263045
>>28262932
Ok so first real invitation of the weekend. He knows my GF left yesterday. Wat do
>>28263390
Do it, but make sure you film it
>>28263285
>drinking beer to get drunk
That's where your problem is lad. Have some whiskey or vodka. Assuming you have any kind of tolerance, getting drunk on beer must take so long
>>28263418
Ofc I'd film it. If I have a ONS I put in every effort to film it.
>there'll never be any more ricky gervais podcasts with karl
>>28263261
>>28263167
that's not me
I'll give it a watch but if I turn into one of these waifu posting degenerates I'll have you to blame
>>28263390
THIS ANON IS GOING TO CHEAT ON HIS GIRLFRIEND WITH ANOTHER MAN.
PEOPLE ARE DISCUSSING THE BEST WAY TO EARN INTEREST ON THEIR SAVINGS
WHAT EVEN IS THIS FUCKING BOARD ANYMORE?!
>>28263441
He's a subby little shit so he isn't going to say no
>>28263504
Sorry some of us aren't total losers :^)
Enjoy being a broke KV
>>28263390
You're in a relationship, you vile cunt.
This Tombola bingo chatroom is weird.
I'm so used to 4chan kinda posts that everyone here is all friendly.
>>28263504
>people that aren't me are having sex
>REEEEE
>b-buit it doesn't matter anyway because i'm asexual
make up your mind you pathetic faggot
>>28263538
This is the board for losers, this is the only place he have left, go to fucking reddit or facebook if you want to talk about normie shit.
4CHAN IS NOT FOR YOU.
>>28263561
pic related
tbo
>>28263553
With a woman, so who cares
It's only wrong when gays cheat on each other
>>28263504
Fuck off to wiz chan virgin. You are not welcome here.
>>28263561
I got really freaked out on that thing desu
>>28263561
>tombola bingo
Christ, really? I can understand people who drop pennies on accas daily on their paddy power apps, or those who can't get enough online poker, but fucking bingo? Are you trying to hook up with pensioners or something
>>28263600
My pal gave me a free 5 quid code so just using it on the bingo lite shit.
>>28263390
I'd say no but if you're going to film it share it here then do it.
>>28263224
For some reason I was going to recommend The Hole to you to see ridiculously y ougn Natalie Portman tits, then I remembered that it is Keira Knightley who gets her tits out in that, not Natalie Portman.
Get the two confused.
Still a good watch though, The Hole that is.
>>28263585
I have been on 4chan since I was 15. A lot happens in 9 years, but I still enjoy coming on here. Sorry if this ruins your sad daydream of 4chan being secret loser hugbox HQ
>>28263585
>This is the board for losers
Show me where in the rules it says that cunt.
>>28263285
You can always get some delivered mate. Either from Just-Eat or a local booze baron.
I just got back from the shop with my 10 cans of Stella, hopefully should be enough for a quiet Sunday session.
Not used to this lads.
No one is calling each other cucks or autistic.
>>28263078
My boss and co-worker are double my age, the other departments have some decent people but I literally get no time to socialise, being a 3 man technician team in an extremely busy workplace so I tried looking elsewhere. People tell me I still have plenty of time to make friends and shit but it's been a year now and nothings happening
I want to keep living this life of work > videogames > sleep repeat but my brain is telling me otherwise
>>28263668
So call one of them a cuck?
>>28263668
The idea of middle aged/old women spending their time talking online while playing Bingo is really fucking depressing for some reason.
It is absolutely fine that us young NEETs sit on here and shit post all day, but then I think about someone my mum's age doing it it is really sad for some reason. I want them to have irl friends.
>>28263736
Mums are just a different type of neet lad.
>>28263754
This fucking wisdom right here
>>28263132
>>28263132
>>28263167
>>28263497
Don't lose your head over it anon just watch it :)
>>28263736
there are tens of thousands of widowed 70+ grandma's sitting home alone month after month with nothing but the TV to keep them company anon.
>>28263418
>>28263504
>>28263553
>>28263618
I asked him to tell me what he wants to do. When he replies I'll tell him what I want to do. Until then I'm gonna build a shisha and watch a movie. Naturally replies will be screenshotted and posted here
If I win this, I'mma call them all cucks
>>28263814
Sorry what is this, some bingo website?
Why are they getting this excite over what is pure chance and has zero actual skill involved?
>>28263814
god that menopausal innuendo is fucking cringy. ask them if they want to cyber with a hot mid-20's stud
>>28263832
It's Tombola.
Like an anon said. These are probably middle aged men/females that are the neet versions of us.
>>28263538
Well that's fine, but this might be the wrong thread for you. Go to /int/.
Also, I am totally jealous that I'm not a degenerate homosexual like you are.
>>28263390
you're fucking disgusting mate
hope your GF cheats on you someday
>>28263793
Well that's not helped the misery of my thoughts, anon.
>>28263793
That's depressing and absolutely true, never thought about it much before but my family would rather all stay at home watching tv than meet up and be happy every now and again. And here I thought I was the only one in my family that was alone
I didn't win. 4leaf looks like the typical fucking loser like us.
>>28263892
If she does I'm not even sure I'd be mad. It'd certainly give me an excuse to plough all the fresh furrows I have lined up, including this pussyboy
>>28263920
>4leaf
he's a total 4chan tard lad
>>28263920
>the_assassin71
A fucking edge fag too.
>>28256402
Thread's almost done and only just posting sakurako, disgraceful behaviour on my part desu
>>28263639
haha. as if there would be a written rule on the top of the board and anyone who even hints at being a normie is immediately banned. totalitarian 4 chan.
>>28260609
yes theres a general in /toy/ you should go post there
>>>/toy/5627289
![kiniro07[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/QzdHZSA.jpg "kiniro07[1]")
