>mfw people who seek to "help others" first do not probe the participant in question for their strengths and favorings, but instead offer them a wall of single lined canned advice
Why do people who live on clouds handing out life lessons have such a hard time understanding they cannot assume to the nature of everyone's situation at face value?
Counterintuitive fucking arguments.
>>27394463
keep whining bitch nigga
>>27394463
because everyone thinks they know better than you and some say they've been through it.
Honestly i don't give advice because it's not something people should do without being asked for it.
You keep your mouth shut until people ask you for something
It makes them look good.
The idea being that not only will you look up to them as some kind of deity but they also look saintly to others for helping out a dirtbag.
>>27394463
You're seriously being a little bitch
You know you're free to say, " but Chad I can't really do that because blah blah blah"
If they're already giving you advice they'll most likely address that. Stop looking for an excuse to bith and moan and play the victim
Was that too much of a "wall of single lined advice" for ya?
>>27394463
Because faggot ass robots have this stupid idea in their heads that they're in the shitty situation they're in and it's IMPOSSIBLE to get out of it, so might aswell cry about it.
There ARE things robots can do to stop being faggots, but they'd rather complain about it than actually fix their life.
THAT is why people "above" are frustrated about it.
I've seen this time and time again
>waaa im so lonely
Hey robro i'll be your friend
>no reply
>>27394633
Tell me this things that us robots can do to fix our lives. I am really interested what will fix my shit face, my schizophrenia, no joys etc.
>>27394463
Yeah OP honestly it seems to me like you just want people to cater to you. You're not a special snowflake like you think you are, you have to get out there and earn your respect. I think once you see the world you'll realize everyone is actually just like you.
So give it a try. Get up and stop crying in your basement.Something like this you mean, OP? This is why I hardly ever give advice. Instead I just vomit a textwall of my own experiences so that I can get both the catharsis I am addicted to and maybe offer something that they may/may not be able to empathize with. Or at least that's what I think I do.
>>27394699
>>27394633
>wanting to be friends with strangers
NOOOOOORRRRMMAAAANSSSS!!!!!!
>>27394463
They think that because they have better, they know better. This should be some sort of fallacy its so fucking common.
>dude I have a girlfriend so it means I must be doing something right
no it doesn't
>>27394728
i think it is, it's the validation fallacy, but it's applied differently here.
Example
>i have many friends that tell me X AND Y therefore it must be that way
That's the validation fallacy
This threads are the only reason I'm in 4chan.
Takes something that sits in the back of my mind which I can't find the exact words for and expresses it really well. Nice thread op
>>27394633
Give me ONE thing I can do to get a girlfriend that does not require gambling with my already fragile as fuck self esteem, approaching random people and being called a creep
If its going to gym, building a career I've already done that, and its a waste of time. You may look better but its not gonna get you a girlfriend.
>>27394843
>afraid of going up to strangers
Physically force yourself to talk to strangers, over and over again. It'll become easier over time. Think of it like levelling up in a videogame.
>getting a girlfriend
You gotta find a girl who's into the same shit as you. You can't just see a hot girl and think "girlfriend".
Go to whatever nerdy (i assume, since you're on r9k) place you usually hang out at, and strike up a conversation with a girl. If she's minimally interested, invite her for lunch.
Don't try to get her to be your gf. That's what faggots at clubs do. Befriend her first, and then over time it'll evolve into a relationship.
Mainly stop being a faggot, scan for good people, and farm interactions with people.
Hope it helps anon.
>>27394727
Nice meme, but the people who genuinely believe this are gonna be depressed as fuck, so might aswell get out of the hole.
>>27394677
Life is hard as fuck m8. It might be harder for some, but it's shit for everyone.
What you gotta do is power through the shit phases and enjoy the good phases.
But you can't power through anything if you're a depressed pile of fuck.
Which means you gotta take initiative and not spend 69 hours on r9k a day.
Also, see above.
>>27394964
Are you being intentionally ironic, friend?
You do know what the topic of the thread is, right?
>>27394964
>Go to whatever nerdy (i assume, since you're on r9k) place you usually hang out at
>r9k
>hanging out
>>27394964
>>27394964
What makes you thing I could do any of that shit?
>>27394983
I'm not being ironic. I'm proving that it's very much possible to stop being a faggot. Most robots just dont wanna do it.
>>27395052
That's what you gotta do if you wanna stop being a faggot.
>>27395112
>Most robots just dont wanna do it.
I'm scared to see such a level of delusion
>>27395107
Listen dude, I don't give a shit, I'm just some anonymous asshole online. But you gotta take care of yourself.
If you wanna stop feeling like shit, you have to work for it. Simple as that.
if you can't do it, try until you CAN do it.
>>27395112
Hangout by myself?
>>27395157
I don't have to do anything, fucktard.
>>27394463
Most people (that is, normies) want to be prosocial, and part of that is helping people. But most people also lack the introspection to see the total uselessness of offering advice. For example, I don't think anybody has ever received meaningful advice, but it's simple enough to think "well I'm going to do it better than all those people who offered me useless advice."
Put another way, it's yet another example of the adage, no single snowflake believes it is to blame for the avalanche.
>>27394463
Are you the attention whore of the hour or something?
>>27395172
Obviously no. That'd be stupid. Go to a place where there's lots of people like you, and socialize with people there.
Example:
>be fuckin nerd
>go to manga\animu\videogame shop
>interact with people
>friendily invite a grill for casual lunch
>if it goes well, invite her to a second and lunch
>repeat
>eventually hang out at each other's houses and be bf\gf
>>27395203
What do you mean?
>>27395112
Wow
Wowowowow
R I G H T
O V E R
Y O U R
H E A D
Top
Fucking
Lol
>>27395286
>>27395286
>be fuckin nerd
>go to manga\animu\videogame shop
>interact with people
>friendily invite a grill for casual lunch
>if it goes well, invite her to a second and lunch
>repeat
>eventually hang out at each other's houses and be bf\gf
Is this bait?
I think you're retarded. What kind of loser goes to a videogame shop to talk to people and pick up girls. Besides the only women you're going to find their are the kind looking to buy call of duty for their child.
I have a feeling that you don't have any friends either do you? Thanks for making me feel better about myself tho
>>27395381
I didn't mean a videogame shop like GameStop or whatever variant people have around the world.
I meant those tiny as fuck "indie" shops where the REAL nerds go to.
>picking up girls
That's the wrong mentality fampai.
I actually met my gf through this method, which is why I'm giving that advice.
YOU'RE NEVER GONNA HAVE A STACY, BUT IN REALITY YOU DONT WANT A STACY, YOU WANT THE FEMALE EQUIVALENT OF YOU.
THE PLACE TO FIND THE FEMALE EQUIVALENT OF YOU IS SOMEWHERE YOU YOURSELF WOULD BE.
>inb4 ree normie get out yadda yadda
>>27395491
>YOU'RE NEVER GONNA HAVE A STACY, BUT IN REALITY YOU DONT WANT A STACY, YOU WANT THE FEMALE EQUIVALENT OF YOU.
THE PLACE TO FIND THE FEMALE EQUIVALENT OF YOU IS SOMEWHERE YOU YOURSELF WOULD BE.
Time to look for a female equivalent of myself secluded from society. Thanks for the help.
>>27395286
>>interact with people
How?
>>27394964
>Physically force yourself to talk to strangers
The guy lauwf does this all the time and its awkward as fuck. And the guys a fucking chad. Truth is, the vast majority of relationships are created and instigated through other people, a mutual friend, an ex girlfriend. If you have these you are in no position to give advice.
You are literally shamed if you go up to a girl and they don't want you there
>Think of it like levelling up in a videogame.
kek get the fuck out of here bro
>>27395491
>YOU WANT THE FEMALE EQUIVALENT OF YOU.
Hell no. I hate myself.
>>27395555
LOOK at those beautiful numbers
Formal real life robot who turned his life around here.
Politely ask for advice on anything related to becoming a passable member of society and I'll answer to the best of my ability.
Be as specific as possible
>>27395606
What makes you think you're in a position to give advice to others?
OP just summed up every "just lift and improve yourself bro" thread on r9k
>>27395711
FUCK
these dubs
FUCK ME
>>27395555
You're one to talk. You're in a secluded place browsing r9k. Do you think you're gonna find anyone here? Fucking look for girls and stop making faggot excuses.
>>27395575
Walk up to lonely nerdy but qt girl in nerdy place
"Hey I see you here all the time\ I see you like [manga\animu she's interacting with], wanna have lunch with me? There's this restaurant close by"
Honestly, as long as you're not a faggot about it it's fine. She might decline, but that's fine.
That's how I got a grill to have lunch with me like a year ago, and I'm gonna go watch a movie with her on Saturday.
>>27395585
It's only awkward as fuck if you're a faggot abotu it.
>dont be afraid of talking to girls
>dont try to get in their pants
>dont try to be her bf immediately
>DO aim for being her friend
>dont be a creepy shit
DO NOT go up to girls in clubs.
DO NOT go up to stacies
GO go up to qt girls
Simple as fuck.
>>27395596
Then enjoy being a lonely shit all your life.
>>27394964
>Physically force yourself to talk to strangers,
what you're saying is logically equivalent to telling a person who is afraid of heights to jump out of a plane without a parachute.
>>27395792
>It's only awkward as fuck if you're a faggot abotu it.
Thanks for the advice m8, really helps
>>27395792
The fact that this thread turned out this way is HIIIIlarious
I can't believe it really happened
>>27395821
>be afraid of heights
>face your fear
>beat your fear
>no longer afraid of heights
YEAH THAT'S KINDA HOW PEOPLE SOLVE THOSE PROBLEMS.
>>27395837
Well what the fuck do you expect me to say? Are you such an omega that you don't know what's socially wrong to do?
>>27395792
Anon I think you might be underestimating how much your looks have to do with your success.
If a robot approaches a girl in public he will undoubtedly get btfo
>>27395904
>YEAH THAT'S KINDA HOW PEOPLE SOLVE THOSE PROBLEMS
>jumping out of a plane without a parachute will fix your fear of heights
kek
>>27395918
Trust me. If you approach a stacy, just because you wanna fuck her, you're gonna get shit on.
If you approach a girl you actually wanna have a relationship with, it'll go a lot smoother.
The fascinating thing about robots is that they complain abaout being lonely but then only go for the hot girl they wanna fuck.
The very first girl I ever took an interest in was a nerdy but qt grill. I invited her to hang out and she accepted. If someone like me can do it, you can too. It's just a matter of dropping your excuses and diving head first into it.
>>27395904
> actually giving advice of this caliber despite the OP blatantly dismissing this type of blanket statement advice as being shit tier
You have no sense of irony and you give shit normalfag platitude advice
>>27395904
>you don't know what socially wrong to do
Not that guy but yes, that pretty much sums up most people on here
The problem with socially adjusted people giving advice to robots is that they assume what comes naturally to them is also intuitive for everyone else
>>27395637
Experience, knowledge, and success.
>>27395963
Aw shit I didn't see the "without parachute" part.
It's not like you're gonna get hurt if people refuse your social advances. Just keep doing it over and over again.
>>27395904
You're right bro, except I do none of the shit you listed. Fuck off with your simple bro truths
>>27395491
>I meant those tiny as fuck "indie" shops where the REAL nerds go to.
What are these indie shops you talk about and why would I ever go there? I hate hipsters.
I occasionally go to a tiny cramped comic store where there's only space for one person to go down per isle and there's rarely anyone there but once again stores aren't the type of place you go socialising.
>>27395970
>The fascinating thing about robots is that they complain abaout being lonely but then only go for the hot girl they wanna fuck.
You're making assumptions.
>>27395982
Ok if a girl is flirty irl but never texts/ is cold online what does it mean
>>27395984
>It's not like you're gonna get hurt if people refuse your social advances
Dude, this is exactly what people like me fear to death, and telling somebody to regularly go through it is like telling somebody who's afraid of deing from falling to die falling.
Its one thing to tall an arachnophobia to pick up a harmless spider, its another to tell him to pick up a poisonousness one and guarantee it will bite him
>>27395792
>Do you think you're gonna find anyone here?
Yes? It's better than looking in a fucking shop. I know next time I'll hangout at the bank or perhaps the petrol station.
>>27395974
There's no way to give better advice. There quite literally isnt. All you're doing is throwing out faggot excuses instead of listening to other people's advice and getting shit done.
>hurr durr I dont get what "interact with other people to get better at interacting" means
Is everyone ITT trolling?
I can't flippin' tell
>>27396044
Please explain her actions which lead you to believe she is flirty
>>27395980
I can fix that problem right fucking now then.
If any socially inept robot wants to not be socially inept anymore, I'll do my best to be a friend and teach them to not be inept anymore:
[email protected]
If you contact me, you'll get some advice, interact with another human being, and prove me wrong
If you ignore me, you're just showing that you just wanna throw excuses.
>>27396016
Am I wrong through?
>>27396068
That's how you LOSE that fear though. Do you not understand what I'm saying?
A poisonous spider wont stop being poisonous just because you're not afraid of spiders. That's a bad analogy fampai.
>>27396074
GOOD JOKE HA HA
Tell me when ANYONE on here gets a gf from r9k. I have a feeling that this board doesnt even HAVE females, and every fembot is just a male anon pretending to be female and typing "stereotypically stupid female" things.
>>27396094
I'm not even one of the autists who can't interact, I'm just looking at your advice and you take it as a personal insult when people don't like your advice
>>27396168
>Tell me when ANYONE on here gets a gf from r9k
Vyro he's a dirty tripfag who's had a femanon gf iirc
>>27396129
Constant touching. Will stand unreasonably close. Leans on me when walking. Hangs up on people if it means getting to talk to me a bit longer
But can hardly get a few words reply not irl
>>27396001
Then DO that shit I listed. What the fuck are you talking about?
>>27396003
I didnt mean hipster stores because naturally those stores are populated by hipsters, which you DONT want to interact with.
That comic store is a good idea. Scan for girls there.
>>27396177
Yes, another thing about normies is that they're not aware of their own ignorance, so people pointing it out is a horrible affront. I think this is a large part of why normies like small talk.
>be me
>come to this thread
>read the topic of the thread
>anon giving away advices,acting as if he knows everything while the only person he could compare other people's psychological things is himself
cant believe thread went this way, this is bottomly hilarious
>>27396168
>That's how you LOSE that fear though
no its not, it only validates your fear, and confirms that what you fear will happen. The point of putting somebody through these trials to overcome their fear is to prove to them that their fears are out of proportion and are not accurate at all. You are validating my fears and telling me the only way to overcome them is to regularly experience them, which is not true and actually traumatizes people more.
>>27396177
Like I said, I'm just some asshole online. I geninely don't care if people don't like my advice. I'm no one in the robots' lives.
I do however, think it's stupid how people can solve their problems but just bullshit themselves.
>>27396221
Aight, fair enough. One dude. Point being it's unlikely that it'll happen.
>>27396271
>Then DO that shit I listed. What the fuck are you talking about?
6 of the things you listed are things I shouldn't do. Reading comprehension
>>27396271
>That comic store is a good idea. Scan for girls there.
There aren't any and that's a terrible idea even if they were because it'd be awkward standing there blocking the tiny aisle, trying to chat up someone who just wants to get a comic and then get kicked out one of the few stores I enjoy just because I felt like being an obnoxious cunt.
>>27396289
You're mistaken.
Facing your fear doesn't necessarily have to do with the fear being stupid, it just works to get RID of the fear.
Once again, you're making excuses.
>>27396307
It's more likely than going to a store. Stores are for buying things, 4chan is for talking about interests and shit.
>>27396232
You have 2 options.
1. Ask her out immediately.
2. Create distance. Don't text her, find excuses to get away from her when you are with her. Do NOT make it obvious. Don't act cold, act completely normally when you are with her, just make it seem like you have better things to do.
Option one is better if you have enough confidence.
>>27396372
More like you have two butts
The first is better if you ask me, though
>>27396340
>it just works to get RID of the fear.
And once again, telling people to regularly experience their fears doesn't fix them but creates more trauma
>Facing your fear doesn't necessarily have to do with the fear being stupid
Yes it does, you don't want to 'fix' a fear that's justified, and reasonable
>>27394463
because they are narcissistic assholes, that's why
>>27396340
I can attest first hand that approaching people only makes things worse, and makes me more miserable, try again
>>27396423
When is a fear justified and reasonable?
>>27396368
I disagree, but I still wish you good luck with that.
>>27396423
It only creates trauma if you're a faggot about it.
By your logic, do you think being afraid of talking to strangers is reasonable?
>>27396479
You kidding? If you get raped and mugged in a bad alleyway, fear tells you not to go back there. Fear tells you not to jump on a fucking lion
>>27396168
meh it feels like your doing for job purposes, you may be writing some research papers on the sociology of image boards or something along those lines.
Or you are at the very beginning and you need clients.
Anyway does it occur to you people just want a place to vent and complain? if they want help they are perfectly capable of googling life advice.
I don't know you smell of suspicion
the other thread got deleted
>>27396480
>It only creates trauma if you're a faggot about it.
Thanks man for the rad advice,
>By your logic, do you think being afraid of talking to strangers is reasonable?
You seem to acknowledge that people will reject my advances, in which case it is
>>27394964
Imagine you wake up one day in the body of a fifth grader and the only people you can befriend are fifth graders. When it becomes apparent that you aren't making any friends, some try to be kind and offer you advice:
>Hey man you just gotta keep talking to people! What do you have in common with other people around you? Pokemon? Digimon? A collection of transformers? You just gotta keep trying and eventually you'll find someone who gets you.
>>27396372
What will 2. Achieve?
Also if 1. Goes wrong because it turns out she's just a touchy person, will that mean we probably can't be friends after that?
>>27396518
>Getting raped and mugged is equivalent to talking to people
What the hell are you talking about. Baka.
>>27396480
>if you're a faggot about it.
you say that like it's impossible for me to be a faggot
>By your logic, do you think being afraid of talking to strangers is reasonable?
Based on my personal experiences, ABSO-FUCKING-LUTELY
>>27396539
>ou seem to acknowledge that people will reject my advances, in which case it is
To add to that, you should be trying to convince me that its not the case, rather than justifying my fears and telling me to stop being a faggot
>>27396581
That's pretty accurate, normie
>>27396478
I'd like to know why it worked for me, then.
I've never talked to another human being besides yes\no with my parents, but one day I went up to a girl and straight up asked if she wanted to hang out, and she accepted.
I'm not even that good looking, so don't even go there. I'm skinny manlet.
>>27396523
Fuck I didnt copy paste what I was gonna type.
>>27396539
You're the one being a faggot for blindly refusing to listen to advice. You're just sitting there going "NOPE. IT'S IMPOSSIBLE TO GET BETTER. NOPE, DONT EVEN TRY DONT BOTHER, NOPE!"
That's why you do it over and over again, till your advances skills become better.
>>27396581
nice strawman. You asked what was justified/reasonable fear I answered
>>27396518
Why are you afraid of rapes and muggings? What are you, some kind of existential pussy? Wooow....
>>27396637
That anon wasn't me (the asker of the question) you BIG FUCKIN DOPE!
This is me >>27396639
Because they don't give you advice because they genuinely want to help, they give advice because it makes them feel good.
>>27396615
To be honest this guy is giving shit advice, but talking to people is not that hard. The trick is to only talk to people when needed. Fuck small talk. If you have nothing to say just dont say anything.
>tfw multiple debilitating illnesses and all i get told is JUST LIFT AND DRESS WELL BRO
>>27396629
>I'd like to know why it worked for me, then.
I dont know and I dont care, it doesnt work for me, everytime i talk to somebody I have intense anxiety the whole way through and never talk to them again
>You're the one being a faggot for blindly refusing to listen to advice.
In my very first fucking post i said i wasn't going to accept this 'advice', because it doesn't work
>>27396674
>If you have nothing to say just dont say anything.
so never?
>>27394463
its usually more heavy on the one liner "problems" that entitled, spoiled children on this board present. people who help others aren't even a common thing here, but usually advice threads go into detail about how to improve yourself. whining about this shit is just another self defeating argument, showing that another one of your big difficult concerns is "people who live on clouds" giving out vague advice. Wow such a hard life.
>>27396663
Ill give him the benefit of doubt and assume you're not him
>>27396697
Exactly, just keep shit posting on r9k and pol like me.
>>27396574
If you're afraid that she won't be your friend anymore if she rejects you, you are not ready for a relationship in the first place.
Option 2 will show that you have don't need her, which is a display of confidence. Confidence is one of the, if not the most, important thing to attract a woman
>>27396629
all these fucking shrink students out for a challenge.
Are you that bored with your normal patients you gotta come here and play the hero card?
Are you still in school? or are you like a failed shrink that needs to make a really good paper on manchildren for sociology purposes ?
What are you trying to achieve?
>>27396719
Then you choose to believe a lie
I can't blame you, most people ITT, including myself, if not all of us, already have as well
So you are among friends!
>>27396737
Kek, my sides wow ok
>>27396573
The problem with that analogy is that I don't have a problem interacting with my peers.
If I were a fifth grader with no social skills, I'd try to interact with other fifth graders, learn when I fuck up, and try not to fuck up again. Repeat.
>>27396581
This.
>>27396586
That's why you should be motivated to change.
>I'm afraid of interacting with others so I'll be a social outcast till the day I die
Yeah good idea mang.
>>27396754
If you really are him I'd encourage you to dissociate with that post because its embarrassing desu
>>27394463
why do you faggots keep whining? get up and improve your situations, or kill yourselves.
t. JUST BE YOURSELF guy
>>27396523
Nah man I hate psychology. In fact, I hate it PRECISELY becuase shrinks never give good advice
>kid's getting bullied at school
>shrink doesnt tell the kid to beat the fuck out of the bully
I honestly dont care that people don't like my advice. Like I said, I'm just some anon fuck online. I just think it's stupid how FAR people will go in their own denial.
>>27396758
It's true. Why do you think that's funny?
>>27396771
>That's why you should be motivated to change.
Well for some reason I'm not
>Yeah good idea mang.
It's not like I have a choice
>>27396818
Guy asking the question here. Ignore that faggot. Thanks for the advice. What makes you say that about not being ready for a relationship?
>>27396674
This. Of COURSE people will get annoyed and reject your advances if you're making shitty small talk.
>>27396814
>I just think it's stupid how FAR people will go in their own denial.
You keep on posting in this thread and call us delusional?
>>27396814
You said in the other thread you were a shrink, i'm pretty sure i asked you and you said yes.
So what's your deal how did you find r9k?
why r9k specifically?
did you hear about the school shooting memes?
>>27396697
Get interesting shit to talk about then.
If you don't have anything in common with that person then why the fuck are you talking to them?
>>27396872
oh that's right you didn't answer.
the other questions still stand.
>>27396706
This.
Originalu commentu
>>27396741
Not a shrinkfag.
I'm genuinely trying to help people. I call people out on their bullshit to make them realize that they CAN be better.
On 4chan usually people won't ever respond to your reply, so I'd just be asking people questions all day and that's not really that fun. When I give advice, I wanna help out lots of anons, anyone who can relate to the original poster's problems. I don't ever pretend to know all the answers, just try to share something that's helped me that they could give a try.
>>27396706
>>27396909
>its usually more heavy on the one liner "problems" that entitled,
says the entitled spoiled normies who had literally everything handed to them
>>27396835
Then I feel sorry for you. Not in a condescending way. I hope you get the kick up the ass to get shit done before it's too late.
>>27396849
If you're not secure enough to walk away when your chance is up, it shows that you have no confidence because you're desperate for female attention.
>>27396706
>people who help others aren't even a common thing here, but usually advice threads go into detail about how to improve yourself.
Source?
>wow such a hard life
Look a passive agressive normie, what a rare sight
>>27396866
What's wrong with continually posting in the thread?
>>27396872
m8 you're thinking of someone else. If anything, you're the one with the obcession with shrinks.
>>27396950
>entitled spoiled normie
Good joke.
>everything handed to them
Like what?
>>27396983
But I'm not desperate for female attention I just want to keep her as a friend if things fuck up (I know that might be unrealistic) the same as I wouldn't want to just lose a guy pal for no reason
>>27396909
>>27396996
So you are that bored that you feel to come here and dispense your advice?
wow you must be bored, what happened your gf on her period?
>>27397054
Note how you're not disagreeing with my advice, you're just changing the subject.
Tbh I came to /r9k/ and /b/ just to fap. I finished fapping and since I was here I started browsing threads.
>xddd gf period joke
You sound like a stacy who didnt get her way.
>>27396996
>>27396953
Wow such a good attitude
>>27397088
Once again, instead of saying how my advice is shit, you're talking about attitude.
>>27396771
I don't want to be a fifth grader you fucking idiot.
>>27396909
>I call people out on their bullshit to make them realize that they CAN be better.
>Implying a robot can become a succesful normie
>implying the years of isolation can be undone just by talking to people
>>27396932
Meh
>>27397123
I don't need to read your advice to know what you're saying, it's the same old BS
>>27397034
Sorry man, but you don't want her as a friend. You want her as a girlfriend. I know it's retarded, but it's human nature and there's nothing you can do about it. If you stay her friend you will not learn anything, and your confidence will suffer, thus hurting your chances with other women.
Please trust me on this. You're already way ahead of most of the guys on this board, and if you keep going forward you'll learn this eventually anyway.
>>27394463
These people with savior complexes who give away advice when no one asks for it are the biggest pieces of shit you can find out there, criminals aside.
Books could be written about the shitty mindset behind their actions and their "selflessness". Just ignore them, seriously.
>>27397182
You only feel that way because you're in denial.
>>Implying a robot can become a succesful normie
Just look at that shitty attitude.
>>27396996
>Like what?
>born in first world
>grew up with a good family and strong childhood relationships
>>27397228
>dude why are you dismissing my advice and mentioning my attitude
>your attiitude is shit
Kek
Explain how i'm supposedly in denial
>>27397259
>born in the first world
Barely. My country's poor, and corrput as fuck, too.
>grew up with a good family and strong childhood relationships
My parents openly insult me at every chance they get. I've never recieved a single spec of affection from them, or from any other human being for that matter. I've also never recieved any praise. For example, I can get a 15\20 or a 17\20 in a class in school and they've never made a peep about it.
They've openly said I was an accident and they didnt plan to have me.
I've never had a friend my entire life
From elementary school till 9th grade, I had people drag me behind school buildings and beat me up every single day. NOBODY gave two shits about me.
By 10th grade, I stopped being a faggot.
That was a stupid as fuck assumption.
>>27397185
Hmm. Okay I will make an attempt.
>>27397276
>my attitude is shit
You only think it's shit because it's going against how you feel. In reality I have 0.00% malicious intentions.
>Explain how i'm supposedly in denial
You complain about life.
You're told there are things you can do to improve your life
You say that advice is shit
You have the "IT'S IMPOSSIBLE TO IMPROVE, DONT EVEN BOTHER" attitude
>>27397085
i didn't said i disagree, you are saying that, all i'm saying is you are talking to the wind faggot, go back to fapi wish i was a fucking stacy to have life on easy mode
or even an ugly female for that matter
still life on easy mode
>>27397465
That's my point, I'm talking to the wind because most robots dont want to change their life.
At this point I'm just bored and I wanna see how DEEP the denial is.If I were a grill for 24h I'd fap for two days.
>>27397503
yeah the way women orgasm is out of this world, they feel a whole new level of pleasure and it can be prolonged too, i mean their clit is 8k nerve endings and if stimulated well they fucking go bananas... yeah i wish i could experience that
>how DEEP the denial is.
it's pretty deep and i don't understand why are you so surprised about it.
>>27397534
>they fucking go bananas
I have a video of an asian girl with premature orgasm getting nailed for 1h50m.
At the end the dude already busted a nut and left already but she's still lying on the floor convulsing and squirting all over the floor. She's not even touching herself.
>surprised
Nah I'm not really surprised, just interested and bored.
>>27396168
>[email protected]
>grill name
ayy lmao gtfo
>>27397605
In fact, here's the video. Enjoy m80s:
http://upornia.com/search/Premature%20Ejaculation%20On%20Bike%206/
>>27397618
you are kind of late to the thread faggot he already said it's a throwaway account.
>>27397605
top shelf baked chocolate cake
>>27397618
It's backup email. I'm not gonna throw away my anonimity just yet.
I'm a guy btw.
>>27394807
>This threads are the only reason I'm in 4chan.>Takes something that sits in the back of my mind which I can't find the exact words for and expresses it really well
I feel the same
>>27397642
What's that about the cake?
>>27396122
>trolling
we don't do that anymore son. it's called shitposting and cancerfags made it
>>27397728
top kek
but since top kek is boring i improved it
>>27397805
Oh I see it now.
That's pretty autistic but I chuckled. GG anon.
>>27397852
Fun fact is kek means cake in turkish
>>27398450
Fun fact Turkey is the name of a foodl in American.
>>27394677
>get fit, stay clean and healthy, shave your head
>do what the doctor tells you
>try things and meet people
not so hard eh
Are you bitching about how you HAD a shoulder to cry on? really? you're such a whiny bitch that the idea of someone giving up the time to help you further upset you? I don't even know what to say about this. Like damn, you're some ultra sensitive pussy or just a parasite.
>>27397427
>You're told there are things you can do to improve your life
Normie advice doesn't help me
>>27399103
>try things and meet people
>not so hard
Top pip
TOP FUCKING PIP PEPERONI
you clearly don't know about the hardships of life of an introvert socially anxious deadbeat
>get fit
don't want to be a liftfag.
>>27399170
>some normie calling you names = a shoulder to cry on
Kek you fags are out of this world
>>27396950
>entitled spoiled normies
but thats what you are. except you whine about girl "problems" and how you don't have friends instead of some dream job.
spoiled is relative. you can say everyone else had a better life than you, but you're literally on an image board in your spare time complaining that you don't get sex, if you're the type of guy im talking about. the bar on r9k is set at "im depressed" which is the same bar that middle aged housewives set when they run out of books to read and their kids are off to college.
what's confusing is that you want everyone to focus on your """"problems"""" as implied by the OP but all you fucking idiots talk about is how normies live/think and how they deserve to be treated poorly. designated cuck.
>>27399236
>gets offered advice
>talks shit about them
you're no better than high maintenance whores.
>>27399338
>offers shit advice
>expects to be praised
>>27399305
>You're all evil because i say so, don't you dare talk shit about normie BUZZZWORDS buzzzwords Buzzwords
>>27394589
This, fucking this.
Orijinaru desu
>>27399305
BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
Buzz buzz more normalbee
All I hear is Z Z Z
>>27399305
>what's confusing is that you want everyone to focus on your """"problems""""
No, we don't want you to focus on anything
We want you to either fuck off or not be self-righteous cunts
Wats so hard 2 understand
Jk though I'm a self-righteous cunt too
I really don't belong in this conversation
>>27394463
>he has a fart fetishi do too, wew
>he attentionwhores on /r9k/
>he begs for advice and then gets angry when people give it to him
>>27399759
>he begs for advice and then gets angry when people give it to himYou and very few others have missed the entirety of purpose in this threadI will show my guts, even if I have to take and reply to every fucking post in this thread.I refuse to be misunderstood,
And INEVERabandon my threadsI won't be written off as an attentionwhore for what I plan to do, I'll still do it, and risk whatever happens.IWanttohelp.So don't demonize me and let me help dammit..
>>27394463
No doubt three point etcetera
These motherfuckin wobbly-snakes need to learn how to JAZZ IT UP.
Furthermore, Alot of people who do this have a lot of trouble taking their own advice. Which is a common thing among people.
Even if my thread dies.
I won't, be misunderstood.
But I will always allow misunderstanding.
I hate being misunderstood, and I hate posting in my own threads.
I hate replying to multiple posts because it goes against the nature of what I believe in to be a peaceful apathetic approach in moderation applied to all in life.
Perhaps I am I psychopath for my contradictory nature.
But I don't like attentionfags
I do not like to emulate being "hot shit" by making myself the center of attention in a discussion I WISH TO OBSERVE in ABSOLUTE excluseiveness.
I CAN'T taint the legitimacy of replies thereafter once I have started a discussion.
I can't be made to whore out responses in my thread and derail it.
it doesn't work that way.
IT CAN'T WORK that way.
Call me insane, call me a degenerate faggot, but do NOT tell me I am an in-genuine attentionwhore.
Don't.
I'll find a way to make it up to you.
I don't abandon people I consider important to me in some way.
And you all are believe it or not and I cannot stress it enough.
I've never been understood, for too long.
I came here a long time ago to get that understanding, but to lose my mind and turn into this must have just been fate some how.
I've been here longer than I let on, but participated fairly recently in relation to that..
yet it gives me no tenure.
I believe my will and resolve is what justifies my right to say what I do.
Not my lack of experience.
I will not abandon you.
Give me time.
>>27400967
My little love-muffin.
You take all the time you need.
This board is the only thing I have ever felt apart of, and by complete literal explanation, edgelord or not.
I have worn my heart on my sleeve for the entirety of my ordeal.
Every thought I have ever had on this board is public, and people have without a doubt come to me to reference and refute the things I have associated with my person or lack thereof.
I don't want to be remembered. And I will NOT be here forever for the people who will disdain me no matter what I do.
But if I have a fatal sin, it is pride, and it is stubbornness.
I've observed many things, and heard many arguments, but I have never seen evidence.
I have never seen TRUE resolve and true will and intent made visible and able to be remarked upon by any man of any walk of life.
I will make a difference and be the change I dream of seeing, and pull it about with my own ten fingers.
I will pull the very essence of robots from this dejection they feel about living as unloved creatures from the old /r9k/.
This board is my home.
I did it once and i'll do it again.
I am not the anti buddha, and I am not staging an uprising.
I am who I am, and if there are none who truly want to do what I desire to do, than what am I to compare myself to?
Please just give me time, it's the only resource I can use at this point.
Also on a smaller note if I must post while I gather what I mean.
>>27366196
>>27361019
I also named my image pain.
I like your image it isn't wasted on me.
I don't want to be slow and fail anyone but I don't know how to organize my thoughts without going on a tangent and contradicting my point at several turns.
I have a confession if I must anyways.
I haven't kept it a secret that I don't tripcode.
Only because I have in the past and have never changed my tune.
Just my name.
I realized then how futile it was so I stopped.
I didn't have the revelation however, of the damage trying to be a tripcoder does then.
I promised myself not to rob anonymity away.
So I won't disclose those either.
I can't keep my thoughts together half the time, but i've done things like no person should do.
And I feel compelled to individually help and pull people out of terrible prisons however they may have been built.
No man is an island, but they all have different inhabitants.
Bricks of different materials and sizes that build them up into a bind of anguish.
I have no real way of ever disclosing why it is I feel so easy to commiserate but also improve on others' problems.
I can't ever be certain to know if I am accountable for my opinions without appearing to wax philosophical
I can never be awarded certainty, I learned this a long time ago.
I don't tripcode because I don't care for people in ill will who impersonate me.
I invite it.
>impersonate my compassion
>impersonate my aloof humor
>impersonate my will to seek knowledge and draw closer to people I connect with
>impersonate my indifference and confidence in who I am
>impersonate my observations
>impersonate my humility
>impersonate my resolve
>impersonate my genuine traits I believe indicative of the olden /r9k/
>one that did not seek to reflect on it's eccentric nature in so negative a light, but in a unique one, a light that shined as bright as the minds minds who posted on this board their stories of originality, and their stories of trying to discover a world that intrigued but baffled them.
>they weren't bitter unironically, though still maybe bummed out as to their detachment, they did not lash out at the world for being different.
>they owned it
>they called themselves robots perhaps to serve under it's filter but maybe also just indicate their cold yet intrigued nature about other "humans"
>I want to revive that, and it's all i've ever wanted to do is bring this board back together.
Call me pretentious but if I had it my way, I don't mind when people impersonate me.
In fact I have an ambitious pipe dream to request hiro personalize our default names on this board to the one I have chosen instead of anonymous by default, for those of you who have been assed to ask me what it means.
I believe we are all 3.26797385621%.
Why not re invent ourselves as true children of the robot and go back to the way things used to be.
I hate seeing you all clamber over these things with no reference to help and no one to trust in confidence.
Wouldn't you trust an insane person to have proved he is insane and done the impossible?
Doesn't that give him some amount of, for lack of a better term, real estate?
I don't even know what an autist is any more but I couldn't say it doesn't describe me. I do not know.
I lost my grip on reality a long time ago.
Would following the proverbic teachings of a mute sociopathic fart fetishist be so bad?
Some of you are guys are alright, please stay on /r9k/, but do not relinquish the inherent value you all have as individuals.
I have no real way of probing those traits out of all of you neatly because I am just one man.
I wish I had the skill of the boss. I wish I had a will similar.
I wish I could unite my own diamond dogs and make sure this bullshit the board has turned into never happens again.
Don't call me a bitch nigga for it but I vicariously have tried many things in my unconditional love for this board.
I may post in non-sequiturs often just because I had some will to pacify what I knew deep down could be an unhinged temperment.
That is my equivalent of recording a plastic bag like in american beauty and having some stark realization about the reality I live in and the potential of my contemporaries.
My heart caves when I see you all "REEEE"ing and squirming in your minds like toads.
It indicates something I don't think I like but I can't put my finger on it.
I want to show my guts some way but I don't know how.
I want to prove myself and not be misunderstood.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1CDFE-St68U
I want to have the equivalent of this when I see you all being asinine about things that truly do not matter, but are placeholders and falsehoods for worth that you have been neglected.
But know, I do not seek the path of a sycophant.
I don't patronize or give charity to those I believe are childish in their desire for worth.
I don't think anyone is OWED respect, but that doesn't stop me from giving it to ones who sabotage their chances of receiving it from others by claiming it is a right owed to them.
I don't even know about these indications of red pill or blue pill anymore.
I i'm not an advent of miss soggy knees, because I don't believe women owe me for anything.
I don't give worth that tops a person to a woman just because she is one.
ego?
When you get out of a shitty state, it becomes very tempting to help others get out too.
You get so excited, you overlook three major things:
1. The person doesn't want your help.
2. Despite what you believe, the person doesn't need your help.
3. You may not be able to help them.
I've made this mistake too many times. At best, nothing changes for the person. Usually, I only make things worse. Which is bad for both of us, because with every new failure, I wind up closer and closer to the shitty state I escaped from.
I used to be quiet when I felt life sucked. Then I started being social again. Now I'm going back to asocial land. It's better for everyone that way.
good luck on your journey
I am not ignorant to the astronomical permutations of why you are on this board if you are here.
If you are here for a reason and not simply to be a normalfagged socialite looking to mock and look down your nose at others that is.
I realize not all of us are going to make it.
And if I made anything clear in anything I have ever said, it is that I mean what I say and I stand by my decisions adamantly.
I realize not all of us will make it, but that doesn't mean we don't ALL have some chance to, by the very nature and definition of what a chance means.
Some of us will just inevitably hit a wall we could no pass, and that is NOT pessimism and it is NOT defeatism.
It is realism.
We will encounter obstacles we cannot overcome.
But when we can't we will have a robot beside us who feels similar.
Do I feel like I could make it?
Whole heartedly.
But I have mental illnesses I believe dissallow me from truly enjoying it, and will eventually result in my unbitter passive discard of my mortal coil.
But I suppose a person telling you that you could make it and saying he could but wishes not to because of an inexplicable urge is off putting.
Why should you trust him?
I guess you don't have to.
I lived about as much life as I am comfortable with and have no problem bailing on this reality not for another one, but for the lack of one entirely.
I know you all have your own problems and programming for being robots.
But you have to mentally prepare yourself that you may NOT make it but hold out hope that you do. Otherwise do not worry yourself with it and find an anchor in something you can feel a part of and accomplished in. "make that"
Every robot's programming is unique.
We aren't owed anything but we MUST have resilience, otherwise what different are we than normalfags whining on jewbook about being dumped by a stacy?
We can shoulder our emotions, that's our gift.
All of our gifts.
We can take a whole lot of punishment without breaking mentally.
And in this gift we can reconcile with eachother, commiserate with eachother.
You have to adopt a doublethink and have boolean programing in your code, robot.
My gift is extrapolation, to take little evidence and create more.
This is how I "give" advice.
I extrapolate on issues given to me.
You have to of some notion be of two minds of a whole to truly run the numbers on things.
I want to help everyone with too much intrigue that it feels like a fireball is spinning in my stomach.
I will not be here forever, so those who will forever find something about me to seek vitriol against will be overjoyed, but I want to help who I can before I am not.
If anything I would sure go and love to become some omniscient creature in my demise and protect all of you from the embrace of death should it come and meet too soon.
But it will never be too soon.
I feel like I've lived 1000 times at my age, and I don't know why.
I feel complete with what my life has amounted to and look upon it with no ill will.
Nothin perssonel about it. Even if it resulted in me killing myself.
I am not asking you all to follow a man into death like myself.
I'm not trying to make a cult and get anyone to "drink the koolaid" with mass suicided robots because they felt they couldn't make it.
*I* don't want to make it.
I want to move on to nothing or better things.
Nothing about this reality is too important to me any more but you all.
I won't make it because I don't want to.
But you can, perhaps. And you can't be assed to try if you don't want to.
But do not despair with sound and fury with this decision, as it is yours.
Though if you meet the same conclusion as me I have no qualms with your decision, just make sure you have truly sated your desire for life.
Be certain. As I am certain.
I would never just "can" a response to a robot getting off the ride.
You guys are just whinging for no reason.
I used to be suicidally depressed and then one day I actually followed the advice to be myself and I've been happy ever since.
You just need to walk up to that cute girl you've got an eye on, take her bull by the horns, give her a firm handshake and tell her you're her that you can start work for her on that bridge when you come to it.
It worked for me.
>>27402670
It hurts my dignity to say this, but I literally want to be you.
These walls of text will be here forever, perhaps directed at nothing for all they are worth.
I've done my best to explain how I want to help, how I feel I can help, why I want to help.
Maybe I haven't addressed anything.
But I can't expect anyone to completely understand or let alone even read what I have written.
I accept that.
As i've accepted this.
>>26776567
>>26123773
>>26888112
>>25975427
Call what I believe in about acknowledging a person what you will.
But I am not an armchair therapist.
I am not trying to be a pseudo intellectual and I am not trying to feign philosophy.
I try to say what I believe is the truth.
To be honest.
My virtue is to want to be honest.
Honest and genuine.
And I've changed my mind, since I must convince you.
I have no need of pleasentries, if I spill my true intentions with abandon and confidence.
I said what I truly believe as fact.
No one HAS to read a damn thing you or I say, or any of us.
But we know what it feels like to be heard and acknowledged.
As much as it is a hurdle for us to speak and acknowledge others.
We don't say hi when we enter a room, but do we hold some deeper regard and respect for other human beings on a deeper level?
Most likely, but we don't feel assed to say hi.
Normalfags will resent you for this always.
Who was I when I tripped? I change my mind.
I used the name
Oxymordias # honest
I could explain that name too if you want me too.
Go head and turn it on, and tell me if you've seen it.
If you remember who I used to be before this board when entirely to shit.
Back when there was still a saved trace of the old /r9k/ then.
Even before tripping, I lurked because I loved this board.
But I lurked and never posted.
Because I was afraid.
I was afraid you guys didn't feel the way I did.
And when I began to post I felt at home.
After a while yes.
So I tripped.
Yes, but without what it meant.
How it can drive people apart.
but shortly after this I began to second guess my feelings about this board
>>27403018
I just want you fucking assholes to be okay.
It's all I want, it's all i've ever wanted.
But no one believes me.
What happened to this place I can't ever know but I want it to go back.
And I rave inside my mind like a madman wondering why it can't be how it was when I felt it was at its best.
Don't just ignore help, please.
I don't want my only time to make an exception to be for nothing.
You guys had opinions ITT that touched upon things you felt were unchangeable, whether you agreed with my OP or not.
I want you to tell me if I am actually capable of helping you for what you need here.
I need to know.
And if not, please tell me why you believe so?
Please don't make it for nothing.
>>27403332
well I missed the quads.
And managed to make an even bigger ass of myself.
Scoob would be ashamed of me.
Fucking shit, with hindsight I realize something.I practically have some stupid fucking Naruto complex, all of you being sasgay to me.If I didn't have enough reason to want to kill myself before.
I really went and fucked everything up.
To think things could change so badly in a year.
I got a letter about my passport in the mail today too.
It was a notice telling me my processing has been halted due to not making at least a minimum payment of $600 dollars due to my outstanding student loans debt.
I have been planning to megabus to canada for a few months now to kill myself.
This being my numerous revised refuted plan for escaping and avoiding the true consequence many robots are afraid of with an hero'ing.
The effect it has on your peers and family.
In order to loophole this, I planned to leave the country and die somehow, thus denying them the guilt of certainty.
Certainty, shame and incredulousness.
Certainty so that they would never know to be sure and to spare them the shame of thinking that they "let" this happen to me. They didn't. There are also stranger things to note about it.
That anyone you ever met, someone you had some positive encounter with, someone who liked or looked up to you would surely at this point be stricken with a destructive bout of dissonant realization upon news of your suicide.
As if they found out everything they knew about you was a lie.
That every compliment and teaching you'd ever offered them was a lie.
A falsehood by some stranger
Not only would your body be removed from the world but the spirit you had when you knew them. There would be a disconnect, and it could break a normalfag who doesn't have the ability to let go.
I think we all have normalfags we hold dear if even a few.
A fucking car drove by just now while I was cobbling this image together and I heard the song
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Yt-K2weEiM
Barreling out of the windows.
I only heard the doppler effect of this line
>Things just couldn't be the same. / 'Cause I'm as free as a bird now,
I'm not so disillusioned that I cannot laugh at the irony.
Though a short laugh, a hearty one all the same.Donatello please help me.
I have for the first time, in a long time.
Been worried at this fact.
My out has been pulled from underneath my feet
Right in my face
I think to myself sometimes with a fair bit of absurdism if it is possible to escape into your own mind.
I haven't spoken since I was 19, I've abstained from, fap, listening to music, vidya, TV, movies, anime.What little there was, not too into it.
I've tried to abstain from life and it's external pleasures as best I can in the most convenient way possible to prepare myself for the ineffable embrace of my inevitable death.
To warp my sense and prime myself for months
I still liked you guys before, but as of late you are all my only priority.
I couldn't be assed to deal with anything else
No one ever asked me to care this much, but perhaps i'm compensating for having cared about nothing so deeply for my entire life
it's atrophied my passion and in turn made it stronger.
Stronger to give to people I find similar to myself without thinking and without pause.
I love you guys and i'm not afraid of saying so
I wonder what is going to happen to me
I'm NEET, and I'm not getting a job or going back to school.
I don't know what life is going to do to a man like me who abstains to the degree I have done.
To try and escape from reality into my own mind.
I don't want this reality anymore.
Who can stop me from this choice? What is the worst that can be done to me?
Kicked out by my guardians?
>Arrested?
>Institutionalized?
>What does life do to you when you give up on it?
>Apotheosis?
I just don't know and it worries me.
I could be assed to waste my time wasting away now that I cannot die, playing on /tg/ with you guys.
That's about the only thing that has created the most appeal for my life recently.
To enjoy an adventure with some of you.
Be a rat king who looks out for his friends.
To want to share some experience of wonder through a DnD game or something. I want to know what characters you would all create.
>>27404556
>It was a notice telling me my processing has been halted due to not making at least a minimum payment of $600 dollars due to my outstanding student loans debt.
this can't be real.
>you can't get away, goy. no fleeing the country for you. PAY DEBTS
I'll bump this thread till it dies if l have to.
I'll be waiting to see if I can actually fucking validate my claim and not blow smoke up anyone's asses.
I will. I will do so as long as it takes.
Mock me if you will, but without an argument-
A proper argument as to refute my reasonings for doing so, your insults will hold no water, as your malevolence would measure significantly in comparison to my earnestness to accomplish what I claimed in my OP.
Call me protective but I believe that claim is one that normalfags and ones alike use to frustrate robots.
Because it sure as shit frustrates me.
If feeling the way I do is a symptom of depression than So be it.
I suppose i've been depressed for the better part of my life.
But to see what I have done, while still gestating these thoughts in my mind.
Actively.
I feel like an actual Patrick Bateman.
I missed out on Teen love but only for lack of trying.
With this atrophy I built up. This atrophy for passion I can't understand and hide.
I have done things you can't imagine for someone like me.
A freak.
A freak consorting in a life like a chimp outside the zoo in awe and wonder, learning he had opposable thumbs to mimic the "humans" around him.
Humans too stupid to realize that you are not a human but a chimp pretending to be one.
I stake the claim that normalfags attempt to but fail.
They believe they can help because they are better.
I am no better than you all but I know I can help.
I've done things and found worth in my confidence and will to die.
To die would undo my life of course, my accomplishments, but also my failures.
And that relief gives me stalwart pride.
In a subjective sense.
They will exist forever in this world but not in mine.
Where I want to go, reality has no real footing, and no influence.
I will cease to exist and forget my failures, and regrets.
I'll have peace in the form of oblivion
No afterlife or paradise.
Just nothing.
And it's all I want.
I don't abandon my threads, and l never will.
>>27396874
>>27396932
>>27397034
>>27396835
>>27396044
>>27395821
>>27394843
>>27394677
>>27395381
>>27395637
>>27395711
Despite being a chimp pretending to be a person, despite what charisma I have collected. Cultivated.
I still fumble from time to time.
I understand things.
I do.
I don't understand why they are.
That is my problem.
My ability to extrapolate is one that I don't see rivaled anywhere on this board. To extrapolate data and information at the speed, abstraction, and creativity that I do has rivaled sherlock holmes tier deduction, if I weren't such a fucking idiot by nature and knew how to do so willingly.
This deduction is one I will admit with the real risk of being ousted by you guys.
But at this point this thread is my fucking manifisto.
And I apologize for that.
To deduce information presented to me so quickly. Gives me the gift of a synthesized charisma.
A robot With a subroutine to analyze and act accordingly.
Do you want to know what I have accomplished in the past 3 weeks?
I am a kissless, initmate huggless, handholdless, virgin in ways I can't describe.
But I don't feel pathetic about it for very specific reasons.
Reasons I think chalk up to knowing I could do them if I tried or wanted to.
But passion and intimacy are lost on me.
And i'll be damned to prove to someone. To prove to a world that my worth lies in my ability to do these things.
They do not.
I won't be marginalized by my desirability and compassion.
Call me a white knight which I am not, but a person with virtues against it, But I don't and wouldn't get a practice gf just to prove something to people I don't care for.
But if I must have some amount of legitimacy for my claims. I will have to provide proof of the oxymoronic nature of this confession.
>>27400967
Your underlying narcissism and megalomania are showing.
>>27408418
I hadn't become well versed in the tongue of normal fags until I was already a man. It isn't as if a turbonormie chad was here this entire time.
Not that I claim to even resemble the ability of one.
I feel like garbage however with one of those girls in particular.
I feel like I am using them, but only permit myself because they are in either another country or halfway across my own.
Thank you for the anon and his GPS spoof.
I have learned I was capable of doing things I never knew.
Having went to a public HS I knew how to mimic people.
https://www.dropbox.com/sh/7xl1q47ryolnsbu/AADfxmFbHPqrua-sCPpSNugNa?dl=0
I've never had any reason to speak to women outside work or school relation
If you told me i'd soon be speaking to at least 10 women every other 2 of which know about the sick fetishes I have that i've kept under odd embarrassment I would stare you down and 720 degree and walk away
With no prior experience
To think that this kind of thing even happens is baffling me.
I feel like i'm applying sociopathic level banter when I speak to women.
Being an introvert, despite my issue with the label and marketization of the term.
I operate on batteries damn near
I can, and could bantz with normal motherfuckers at least every other 10 mins.At least I could have, a year ago in person. I'm something terrible now. I can't fake it in person anymore.
and then i'd have to sit it out
If I go too long i'd become a fucking aloof zombie for a day or two
If I had to sit in an ethics course at my uni and listen to them prattle for 3+ hours
When I came back I was good as new to pretend again.
I haven't spoken for so long, that these "batteries" had almost gotten me laid.
To think I had charged these batteries for as long as I did and done something like this
To collect women like trading cards and practice banter i'll never use because I was bored.
I only got this phone from a friend the beginning of this month.
>>27408028
Holy shit you are so fucking hot
I don't mean to reduce you down to just that
But damn
DAMN
DAMNIT DAMN
>>27408418
Too bad they're much more justified than your average megalomaniac's, from what I can tell
>>27408562
I never take unnecessary risks and I don't think very much is necessary.
But I have nothing to lose.
I think you know what i'm saying checks out.
I have no reason to lie about any of this.
No reason at all.
But in the same vein I won't dox myself in anyway.
To go and embellish anonymity would simply undo the entirety of my point.
If you all tell me thus you want nothing to do with my kinship or friendship I understand and will kindly fuck well off, perhaps for good. if it suits.
But even still I am able to shoulder that hate you all have, and be a person there to listen.
It's all i'm good for these days.
I'm begging for friendship, but offering mine.
I can bear the frustration that's grown here all together, there is not much else you guys can do or say to me to make me feel any worse than I do now.
To exist as I do in it's self is to be pained.
You let zyzz help you, let me.If not, at least play DnD with me.Does anyone remember when hip slang was shit like "what's on your biscuit?" for "what's the matter/ your problem?
>>27408879
>I'm begging for friendship, but offering mine.
>Not.
>Not begging
>>27408982
Why haven't you run away into an alternate dimension yet?
>inb4 a bluh bluh it's not possible
>>27409124
Because my DnD character sheet has not developed the ability. yet.
I can only view and extrapolate alternate dimensions.
My skill isn't high enough for that.
https://www.dropbox.com/s/60wlrrsxuk86714/stat%20me.rtf?dl=0
You're practically talking about time travel.
Tell me if my character is OP.
I'm also making one for a friend.
I threw it together for him within minutes just off the base he likes the idea of Demon haflings, familiars and cats.
I'm barely 5'4" for fuck's sake there is no self-improvement for me. Are you fucking retarded?
>>27409395
Could you perhaps post an email then?
>>27409414
I'm not a trap my namefag friend. I don't plan on RP'ing but thanks for your interest.
>>27409513
I don't want your ass my friend. I want to know why you believe your height is of any note all for self improvement.
What I want is your trust.
>>27399713
>we
>i don't belong
what
it just doesn't make any sense to bring up your dainty, vague problems, pretend that you want to discuss them, and then redirect all that negative shit on anyone who disagrees with you over anything. you retards even snap if someone approaches the discussion with a possible solution to any of your problems. if robots didn't want to be around normies, they wouldn't come to a social media page that has always been about normies vs autists to avoid them.
>>27409545
Alright.
>Height is an important factor in attractiveness and self-confidence.
>Can do nothing about it.
I'm not averse to self-improvement. It's why I force myself to go to work. It's why I force myself to talk to people. It's why I try to force myself to the gym. But goddamnit the fact that I will always be bottom of the barrel when it comes to relationships for something out of my control despite it not affecting me in any other way, I just don't understand how people can expect someone like me to be okay with that.
>>27409545
>>27409395
>>27409637
I'll give you a freebie here.
Every single woman i've ever seen on tinder who i've swiped. I've had at least one good opener, exclusively for her.
How is that you might ask?
By looking at her.
reading the bio.
The information offered to me.
If a girl is attractive, okay fine. Sure.
If a girl has some outstanding attraction about her, something humble, something interesting, about her appearance or interests that interest me.
I will open with it, and stroke her ego a little.
I will pet upon insecurities they have that I may prefer.
If you can't find something good about a girl why swipe and why bother?
Are you too picky?
What about girls even out of your league.
A good vocabulary may not strike all girls' twats but how you phrase something, how you talk about it.
Women love words.
It's a bonus if they have a kik or snapchat.
This gives you the upper hand.
You can practically talk to them without them ever really swiping you and giving you PERMISSION I guess.
Apply above based on the tinder bio.
Screenshot it if you feel necessary, so you don't forget her likes or her face and appearance. use as reference.
Because after you swiper her right and she doesn't you'll be in the dark and forget everything about her and have nothing to go on.
nervous about the opener's strength. Use a life line, "You took too long/I couldn't wait/lol are you dodging me?/" Press her about why she ignores tinder.
Apply bants
Reap reward with reference about what you like from her profile.
I am a sociopath if you haven't noticed.
But i'm not a bad one.
This thread is an indication of that, and I want to help anyway I can. For starters taking women out of the centerfold of your minds.
Please do that for me at least.
Even if you aren't attractive or have no hobbies or job or anything.
If you have a passion, exploit it.
Learn about what you like and find a way to shill a womans interest in it.
You can get away possibly with being a man, short or ugly and no job and still bantz.
As long as you aren't a goblin, but even then, some woman somewhere actually wants a goblin, you just haven't found her.
The thing about humble men who have little skill in anything else but making a woman feel good and important, makes you an asset.
It makes you something she may want to keep to herself because though you don't know or have much, you seem to be a blank page with her name on it.
You all like to meme that
"there is a random assortment and smattering of words you could tell to any woman to get her to have sex with you"
What if I told you I could figure a woman's
Just by looking at her?'
Though there are a few factors, this being text based banter keeps you safe.
All you have to worry about is timing. Keep some of your best lines and complements spaced apart.
If you want to know why I'll tell you.
Someone asked me if I've ever played chess.
I haven't never got into it. It seems to smart a game for me, but I think I would understand the concept if assed to.
Same thing goes for this latent Lust for DnD.
I always thought it was nerdy shit, and distanced myself from it to prevent being ostracized by normalfags. But I lost my mind and will to care and discovered that I had a talent for it
And loved it.
I have little fears.
One thought I recoil at is of death being a doorway and not a destination.
I'm sure someone remembers this.
https://desustorage.org/r9k/thread/25701739/#25701739
An attempt to face my fears without much avail.
Tell me that none of this makes sense with actual logic.
Take my pill and tell me that I could not help you one on one.
Is it funny my witchdoctor's name is Hitch?
>>27394589
so much this. kind of like that "Nick" faggot who thinks getting a bunch of retards to lift weight will help them with their social issues..
Fucking shit.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cmjrTcYMqBM
DONATELLO IT'S HAPPENING AGAIN.
MAKE IT STOP!
YOU CAN SEE IT THIS TIME
IT'S HAPPENING RIGHT FUCKING NOW!
NONE OF YOU ARE FUCKING REAL.
I'M IN A FUCKING COMA.
JUST PULL THE FUCKING PLUG THIS IS MY WORST NIGHTMARE
JUST FUCKING WAKE ME UP AND SHOOT ME IN THE FUCKING FACE!
Nothing is fucking real.
Are any of you real?
Am I imagining this?
Seriously someone tell me, fuck everything.
And you people wonder why I want to kill myself.
I want to kill myself so badly but I know about the repercussions.
I wish I could just fucking dissapear.
I don't feel real, none of this does.
Being at all seems like a fucking parody of itsself.
Something or someone is pulling the strings to keep me in place.
ANd they are toying with me.
Is this what it feels like to be insane?
Is it really?
My fucking hands are shaking, I can't take this.
THis is the only thing in my life I feel real genuine terror about.
Nothing is worse than this.
Nothing nothing in the whole fucking world.
I wish I could stop everything and erase it.
I don't want to start over I don't want to be normal.
It;s too late for that, something like this cannot be forgotten.
I have to erase my existence for it to really work.
I just wanted to play DnD with you guys, and other things.
I feel like my life is the truman show without cameras
Without an audience.
Without purpose.
>>27410089
>I feel like my life is the truman show without cameras
>Without an audience.
>Without purpose.
Welcome to hell you fag.
>>27410089
Yeah, fuck you.
I knew there were some similarities between you two all along. Figured this was what was going on.
>inb4 denial
Whatever. What matter is that we both know you're so pathetic that in order to get your rocks off you have to target others and manipulate them, which is satisfying enough for me.
You're disgusting.
>>27410155
*matters
>>27410155
Fill me in. Who is this fag and why is he going schizo?
I didn't think I could lose my mind any further than I did this past year but something is constantly dangling proof I am wrong in my face at all times.
All times.
I've been depressed for fucking 3 or 4 years now with the same shit happening over and over and over and over again.
I wish a fucking low yield nuke would fall on my home.
I don't feel like I should erase the world at the expense of my own peace.
I still feel obligated to maintain neutrality.
I'm not evil. Why is this happening to me?
Why?
What did I do?
Is it the urges and intrusive thoughts to do evil in revenge for existing enough to punish me?
Even if I resist them?
Is it a crime to think?
Is it a crime to exist?
I don't want to hurt anyone to get what I want, and I fight day after day figuring out whether or not I would push a button to destroy our planet if not the universe as a whole.
The only thing that leaves my decision hanging is the waning certainty that this is real.
And only real in my head.
And I would be a psychopath dying and taking people with me for nothing.
I can't have that on my conscious. I could but I don't want to.
Maybe I want to be rewarded for good behavior and be released from agency.
To be complimented about actively not being malicious on an extreme level.
I never understood some of that or got the notion of it.
That just because you are not evil does not mean you are good.
Who decides anything, and who's to say?
What compass do we have to measure morality?
If I were an idiot this entire time or braindead I'm not sure I would be content.
I have this creeping sensation my thoughts, even if erased.
Are saved on a cloud.
Wipe my memory. Kill me.
It doesn't matter.
I'll always sync it back up and remember to exist is pain.
A machine that can't be turned off.
I can take my self apart but I can't feel, or turn off.
Or maybe I feel too much
>>27410155
>I knew there were some similarities between you two all along.
I checked your get. What are you talking about, please elaborate.
>>27410201
>can't really fill you in
>it doesn't matter who I am
>because other people made me when they realized I was easy enough to exploit
Oh, and you're the fag.
>>27410265
I see what you're trying to do.
It will not work.
>>27410235
Yeah, I often get dubs
It's a weird feature of my life
I'm talking about you
>>27410265
>>27410275
Oh man this thread is so crazy fampai.
>>27410275
Oh really? Well I see what you're trying to do, and it already has worked. So why are you crying so much like a fucking faggot over nothing? Your feelings aren't genuine anyway.
>>27410298
fucking schizos need to go back to /x/
>>27410288
>>27410298
>>27410303
I may be insane but I am not fragile.
And i'm certainly not susceptible to subterfuge of this caliber.
I don't know who you are. But I'm a genuine person, if not crazy.
I just want to help people but it seems I can't even help my fucking self.
I wanted to play DnD and be trusted.
Now I feel like I need to sick feral rats on you that will make your face think ROOM101 was disney land.
>>27410347
I'm not a schizo.
I'm not. Haha, shit maybe I am.
>>27410374
Then let's play d&d instead of boasting about being sociopathic and masters of extrapolation
Still can't trust you tho
It's obvious who you are
>>27395286
I'm not a weeb or anything though. There's no place i could go to.
>>27394964
>JUST strike up a conversation with a girl.
>>27410374
Rats? How about bees, friend? You should know all about why I pick bees specifically.
I would maul you to pieces in a direct confrontation, that's why you have recede and be all sly and shit. Because you're a pussy, a coward, a deceiver. Someone who can't accept or tell the truth of themselves like you claim you can.
>>27409943
I have no passion to exploit.
>>27410437
*have to recede
I make typos too often
>>27410390
>WHOOOOOOOOOO?
>That I am myself?
What do you mean, do you have a character sheet yet?
I promise i'll fulfill the true role of a mute.
My DnD character was already an Unhinged Witchdoctor.
I'm uhh. haha, i'm practicing that's all.
>>27410374
>I need to sick feral rats on you that will make your face
See? Roleplay, we'll have a good session, pathfinder it doesn't matter...
None of this matter.
>>27410425
What do you hope to gain with these girls?
>>27410437
Bees?
Pleb tier familiar friend.
What the hell are you talking about?
https://www.dropbox.com/s/60wlrrsxuk86714/stat%20me.rtf?dl=0
You would be wrecked my friend. Wrecked.
>>27410452
I donn bulleivit.
>>27410374
Hey. You. Continuing to post in this thread will only propagate your paranoia and further convince yourself the conclusions you've come to are indubitable. You're thinking in black and white. I need you to close this tab. Listen to some music with me.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Frw4TCrga1M
>>27410476
Fine. Whatever. I'm killing myself tomorrow and it's because of you. You don't even give a shit, and neither do I because I needed the pressure.
Fuck you. Hope you get dragged down to hell with me.
>>27410437
>Because you're a pussy, a coward, a deceiver. Someone who can't accept or tell the truth of themselves like you claim you can.
>>27403113
>I used the name
>Oxymordias # honest
I am the truth.
Veritas was marked across my brow as a child.
It's a birthmark reversed, that only I can read in the mirror.
Because it matters not to anyone but myself.
My own personal truth is enough to carry me through existential terrors such as these.
My certainty can be shaken, but my honesty cannot.
I live in a state of hyper realism.
I favor truth to the highest regard.
It's why I hate this reality.
I don't think it is true.
The truth will set you free.Am I winning your edgelord off or do I need to go on?
>>27410484
>>27410552
You're even doing that same old multi trip shit
What the fuck is your problem
What do you want?
What's your deal?
You just get off in it?
Seriously?
Fuck. you.
Leave me alone.Don't stop though, I obviously get off on it too <3
>>27410476
>I donn bulleivit.
I like getting drunk, some video games, some music, sitting still by my computer. Also i enjoy some more active stuff like scuba diving or riding horse.
None of that is a passion, just stuff that i think are alright.
>>27399305
the reason i do that at least is because normies pretty much alienated me. during my elementary and high school days, i was the happy go lucky kid who thought nothing but good of the world, and then i realized one day, everyone was always talking about me or just saying general mean things. almost all of the time, to the point that it became a game. and if u dont participate, youre a pussy.
normies are weird, and i truly wish the lot of them stopped breathing.
>>27410552
>My own personal truth is enough to carry me through existential terrors such as these
Your personal truth has not been revealed so I have no reason to believe it even exists
You seem more like an automaton than anything else
Adaptive but completely devoid of any ideals
>>27410476
>What do you hope to gain with these girls?
I just have an urge to have a gf. My instincts force me to be very attracted to girls and to want to be with them.
>>27410552
See, the battle has always been in your favor because I reveal everything to you in earnest, yet you lie repeatedly and then claim that you are a paragon of honesty.
That's what makes it so hot from my perspective. The cards are stacked against me. Super, super stacked. I want to know you.
It's
oh fuck
>>27410484
>>27410552
but you're seeing it happen right here, right now.
He's telling me i'm a conniving liar.
These are the properties of a rat.
I picked rats on a whim in the last thread with no connotation.
My username is a portmanteau of oxymoron and oxymandias. The king of kings.
Is this not the worst oxymoron of all?
A rat man that you can trust with your life?
That I would give my life for strangers I don't even know?
You're seeing these things unfold before your very eyes.
Tell me you can see it.
>>27410575
What are you talking about?
>>27410601
I am a witchdoctor cyborg. who controls rats.
I am an insane sociopathic autist who has intentions so benevolent they supersede logic.
You have all the evidence you need above.
>>27410609
>>27410577
Okay I want and email address.
I'll help you both or flake trying.
>>27410642
I am a paragon of honesty and balance.
An oxymoron because I am unhinged.
>>27410662
You're just another. fucking. construct.
How can you even put yourself on a pedestal like that?
You're built out of ants like the rest of us. Your potential is only filth so long as you claim your ant-body grants you any potential at all.
>>27410662
you can try i guess
[email protected]
I'm both those posts
>>27410690
Read the fucking character bio.
I have the blessing of the goddess of balance and unconditional absolute truthes.
The Lady Judgement.
I have the inherent ability to tap into this force.
A force of truth, Veritas' force.
She has command over sand and shit man, that's why I can use black sand and ash like substances to bind enemies in it.
I had a truth so absolute and that she made me a.. Damn i'm serious i'm not gonna google it.
the galacutus thing. He's like you're cool so i'm gonna give you power to fuck people up.
HERALD.
Sorry, stream of consiousness.
Herald, I'm a hearald of Veritas the goddess, lady judgement. She's lets me control sand and the probability of outcomes.
It's why I can bantz so hard because I know what you'll say.
>>27410716
You'll be hearing from me. Can we stay here for a little bit?
>>27410773
Hiding behind fiction to justify yourself. Been there done fucking that. We have our ideals, they are separate, they are both false. Why are you still trying? You know what both you and your goddess are composed of, I know what both me and my imaginary minions are composed of. Why the pretense?
I need help
normies are forcing me to kiss a girl and setting me up
It will happen monday when I go to "college"
what should I do?
Don't want to give up robotry
>>27410816
just be yourself, if you're really a robot there won't be a kiss
>>27410805
>Why are you still trying? You know what both you and your goddess are composed of, I know what both me and my imaginary minions are composed of. Why the pretense?
because I'm an honest damaged person who wears his heart on his sleeve and believes in self sacrifice and all that shit.
Every single thing I have ever said is consistent with my belief.
>>27403547
>Fucking shit, with hindsight I realize something.
>I practically have some stupid fucking Naruto complex, all of you being sasgay to me.
>If I didn't have enough reason to want to kill myself before.
Despite being completely self aware and having two minds to balance myself.
I know I am not a weaboo.
I stopped any and all of it. Never liked more than 3 series.
I identify with naruto's urge to save a friend.
But even more so with gaara's struggle to understand compassion and eventual transition into a fan favorite.
Gaara was a product of naruto's will to save others.
>>27408879
Gaara wanted something to believe in despite being a taciturn autist with a knack for sand. Something I identify with.
I had naruto's will as gaara did, but no real enthusiasm to mask my guilt and pain like him.
I only liked part one because I stopped watching it.
I decided to read the entire manga at one point last month to refresh what I liked about it and It was good.
Do you see my background?
Can't you see the barren truth of the desert and appreciate it for it's aesthetic?
I love sand. Sand and deserts could be a fetish for me if I didn't women farting so much.
And guess what, you can trust a guy who likes sand.
He has your fucking back.
You know who doesn't Like sand?
Anakin Skywalker.
He's a beta autist fucking edgelord. And he killed the ones closest to him because he loved too much.
I love too much as well.
But I like sand. Ergo you can trust me.
My Logic is impeccable, find a flaw if you can.
I have spoiled the hearts of many women and I will spoil yours as well.
If my chacter's name is not Hitch.
See, the thing is, I only want to save you robots because I think it's the only way I can redeem myself
It's the only way I can see myself as perfect, free of flaws that the rest of you possess
What the fuck is this shit? What's happening here?
>>27410902
Oh, so you quest for perfection just like the one you claim to hate so very much? So where does the difference lie? In your persistent boredom and complete inability to be anything other than a series of thoughts meant to influence others, but not impress any meaning? Good job. You're good at invalidating communication.
>>27410902
Fuck.
sorry about that ignore it.
>Despite being completely self aware and having two minds to balance myself.
A personality disorder does that.
One mind rationalizes and one speaks my heart's will.
Two consciousnesses.
one constantly treading behind the other.
But in perfect tandem.
Balance.
If you didn't need any other reason to know why Veritas chose me and only me.
I would have lost my mind had she not taught me to control it.
You can always trust a crazy person who is too damaged to see the point in lying.
It keeps his life simple.
His entire life.
He can't be assed to contradict that kind of maxim.
>>27410931
this nigga is nuts
he's samefagging as like 4 different people.
>>27410961
I noticed, but how do i know you're not him? Fuck.
>>27394463
That would take forever to probe strengths.
Better to just give unique advice and hope they can cope. Rely on strength in numbers that one of ten will give useful advice conducive to the questioner's abilities.
>>27410957
Hiding behind fiction again!
Is this supposed to be ironic?
Oh, right, of course it is, your entire investment in this conversation is fictional, as always, whereas a little bit of me has to die every time
Every
Time
>>27410961
Yeah, I know, what a fucking retard. He must have some real problems. I think he might be sick in the head. Maybe he should get himself checked into a mental hospital before he hurts himself...
>>27410990
That seems like a good idea. Something like this isn't normal.
>>27411013
Welcome to the life you've inflicted upon me, faggot
>>27411035
I didn't do shit you fucking insane bastard.
