15 normies spotted 4 clicks north east
Beta Squad, requesting assistance
I repeat
Beta squad requesting assistance
>>26435300
>being this autistic
Kill yourself, you pathetic waste of semen.
Beta squad, do not engage.
I repeat: DO NOT ENGAGE
get the hell out of there senpai
Beta 17 reporting in and ready to tango, sir!
What's the game plan?
>>26435321
FUCK OFF REDDIT NORMIE ASS MOTHERFUCKER
going to class, this thread better be quality when I return
>>26435321
Beta Squad, the normies called in reinforcements
I repeat
The normies called in reinforcements
>>26435334
The normies are moving towards our location, sir
Requesting assistance from beta and gamma squad immediately.
>>26435300
This is Beta 67
Shoot yourself instead of taking other people's lives you fucking asshole
you guys make gun owners look like 25 year old ugly ass virgins
Guys I think my balaclava's on upside down, wait up
>>26435393
Beta 67 has gone rouge!
>>26435342
Stay put private
We need to track their movement
Well, time to get over to that FBI electronic tip line I have bookmarked.
Enjoy being monitored ;)
I'm hurt! I'm hurt! Quick, pass me the health kit!
...Ahh, much better.
>>26435393
Beta squad be on alert for normies disguising themselves as Robots. Pay particular attention to anyone going by the callsign Beta 67.
HQ out.
>>26435321
haha, how can autism be used as an insult? Only an ignorant cunt would use autism as an insult. (And there's nothing l hate more than ignorance)
Autism is a gift in my case, I have an IQ of over 150 which makes me technically a genius thanks to my autism. I've been going through school all my life being bored out of my fucking brains getting at least 95% on all my tests (and all the incorrect answers were silly mistakes) because I'm just too fucking smart for school I can't wait for everyone else to learn something I already knew within the first day or too of being taught it. Every year I scored the best of my year on these stupid multiple choice tests we do and the headmaster came to my class to tell me that, which obviously resulted in being called a 'nerd' which is true but I shouldn't be ridiculed for it.
I recently became home educated so I could learn at my own pace and I'm getting my GCSEs done in 1/4 of the time everyone else has to do it in, I'm also doing more than double the average amount of GCSEs that usually would be done.
I used to get paid $30 an hour working online, which is more than the teaching assistants at my old school earned, it was so fun pointing that out to them.
So, in conclusion, calling someone autistic is not an insult, in my case, it makes me highly gifted.
One more thing, I don't know if this has anything to do with my autism but I am a sociopath so I'm not hindered by irrational emotions like guilt, compassion, empathy etc.
haha, the most satisfying this is to know that you will all see this as a waste of a natural gift that I am undeserving haha, that brings me great satisfaction.
I'm practically perfect, let the jealousy flow through you.
>>26435321
>shitposter spotted, danger close, engaging
>and they wonder why they dont have a gf and why are they depressed
>Ground team, this is Cancer 0-4: Ready for bombing run
>>26435455
>>26435419
>>26435393
>>26435321
NORMIES HAVE INFILTRATED BETA HQ
ALL ROBOTS ON DUTY ARE TO ACT IMMEDIATELY
>People are somehow getting upset over this thread
wew
lad
This is Beta 67 reporting in, don't engage, it would give your family a bad name, you are taking innocent lives away, people with family, isn't there anyone in your family who loves you? Don't do it, it is stupid.
>>26435492
hur dur normies
So it's a norm to kill people better then you?
>>26435434
> I have an IQ of over 150
I doubt "geniuses" such as yourself would waste their time arguing with strangers over the internet.
>>26435455
Enemy spotted at grid coordinates Beta Beta Chad Niner Zero Zero Zero
All Beta units to current location and status
>>26435506
HQ, cut contact from the rouge Beta squad. Beta 42, out.
Beta Squad, this is Epsilon 16, I have an announcement to make, may I have your attention?
>>26435541
Granted, epsilon 16.
I'M FUCKING GOING IN BAREHANDED
FUCK THESE NORMIES AND FUCK WAITING FOR REINFORCEMENTS
IMMA FUCK THEM UP
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
FUUUUUUCK THIS IS BETA 43 MY SQUAD WAS OVERRUN BY TYRONES
WE NEED IMMEDIATE REINFORCEMENTS
>>26435557
BETA 19 DO NOT ENGAGE!
I REPEAT
DO NOT ENGAGE
Beta Squad requesting immediate assistance!
The normies have doubled in number
>>26435492
EVERYBODY PANIC
THE NORMIES ARE HERE
>>26435554
Beta Squad, I regret to announce that you betas are becoming the new Chads.EPSILON UPRISING AGAINST BETAS HAS BEGUN!
FOR CHO!
Beta 12 reporting in
We have 6 chads closing in on our location as we speak
Requesting back up from all betas in the area!
EPSILON 16 HERE, YOU BETAS NEED TO DIE!
I hope Gamma Squad will side with me
This is Special Operations team Omega
We have been engaged by Chad and his gf.
I repeat, we have the location of Chad and are currently engaged with him at my location. All available units coverge on this position and render assistance.
Fedora units are down, I repeat Fedora units are down, please advise Beta Command.
Kilo delta echo three, this is CENTCOM do you respond?
>>26435598
DO NOT PANIC. REPEAT, DO NOT PANIC. STAY IN POSITION, REINFORCEMENTS ARE ARRIVING SHORTLY. OUR ACTIVE WORD IS ELLIOT OVER.
Air support is inbound.
THERE IS NO GOD BUT PEPE AND WOJAK IS HIS PROPHET
*EXPLODES*
EPSILON 16 SPEAKING, DIE BETAS, KEKAHU KEKBAR!
>>26435670
Beta command reporting in
Beta HQ is currently under attack
Sit tight, Omega Squad
I'll send Gamma squad to your location
PREPARING TO ENGAGE NORMIES, REMEMBER MEEEEEEEE
>>26435434
Yeah, but you're still autistic
>>26435528
I have an IQ of 147 and arguments are one of my greatest joys in life.
It sounds sad but it's quite fun
>>26435300
Wow I need to come here more. This is hilarious.
Not a chad but equivalent in a way, Im like the loner version of chad; drive a Harley and just plain alpha. Am I normie? Hate chad, feel robot but Ive always been into lifing and now into MMA so alpha but not typical so am I welcomes?
>tfw not socially alpha so have to be physically.
>>26435664
Back up is on its way, hold position. Beta 54 will be arriving shortly.
>>26435668
CENTCOM. WARNING, EPSILON 16 IS ROGUE.
>>26435670
Don't worry, personnel are coming kid. Pssshhh.
>>26435804
Cyborg
O R I g I n a L f a m x D x D x D
>>26435804
You're what's called a cyborg. You consider yourself a robot, and for in with robots, yet you could, if you wanted to, become Chad.Join the Cyborg legion brother, our divisions are Gamma Group Division 5 and Alpha Group Divison 99
Good Boy to HQ!
Where are the tendies?
I can't fight without yum yum in my tum tum!
>>26435887
Good Boy? You mean... you're Good Boy? Of Beta Squad Divison 1 Company 1? General, I'm sorry to report that the Normies have taken all our tendies away, and that there are no yum yums for your tum tum.
If you want your tendies you'll have to take back Beta Base 2, our tendie storage facility, which was captured by the Normies.
Beta Squad 43 Officer 12
Am sad, cannot make the rondevu
Repeat: Am sad remembering last year and going to lie down, God speed
>>26435887
It's an honour to meet you General Good Boy!
Beta 5 reporting in, Beta Base 2 has been taken by normie forces.
Special Operations Team Omega and Beta squad 10 are currently under attack by chads
Requesting your assistance, sir!
>>26435668
GAMMA SQUAD 66 HERE, EPSILON 16 WHATS YOUR 20
WE ARE 30 CLICKS FROM THE BETA HQ WHATS YOUR POS
Low Orbit Ree Cannon (LORC) charging up at 75%!
We'll fire on your go, Beta Command.
>>26435797
Mine use to be 160. My friend who was seemed like a lower tier genius scored 139 on the same test. Im dumb as fuck now after all the drugs and fights/getting jumped. Lucky to have 100 but I would guess maybe 112.
>>26435985
I AM EXACTLY 14.67 KLICKS AWAY FROM BETA BASE 2, AND AM PREPARING TO LAUNCH AN ASSAULT IN AN ATTEMPT TO GET ALL THE TENDIES BACK FROM THE NORMIES AND FOR MYSELF
I AM WILLING TO SHARE WITH THE GAMMA SQUAD FOR A PRICE OF 500 GOOD BOY POINTS, NO LESS
>>26436017
EPSILON 16 REPORTING IN, FIRE ON BETA HQ ASAP
Gamma squad reporting in, we are willing to give 500 gbp if you share the tendies
>>26435847
Im no chad always was that less than pretty boy tier.
>tfw good looking but not that good looking. 7/10 feels
>>26436099
Epsilon 16 speaking:
That's a deal soldier, I'll report back when the tendies are secure
REPEAT, I REPEAT
Normie HQ found at this location
>>26435787
MOVE OUT, SQUAD!
>>26436027
GAMMA SQUAD HERE
IM UNDER ATTACK WHILE EN ROUTE TO BETA BY THE FUCKING BETAS AT BETA BASE 6
IM HIT BUT IVE TAKEN DOWN MORE THAN I CAN COUNT
IVE I SURVIVE THE ASSAULT I WILL SHARE THE TENDIES AND THE GBP FOR THE TENDIES
>>26436129
CALL A RAID SOLDIER
>>26436132
Soldier, if you survive this, after the uprising you're getting promoted to Captain. You will spread the feels, brother.
Main pilot here, ready to start up Gundam Pepe Mk.II
Waiting for coordinates
>>26436099
>>26436099
EPSILON SQUAD HE'S A BETA DONT TRUST HIM
>>26435434
Lol what a fucking loser.
>>26436092
LORC FULLY CHARGED
Aligning coordinates to Beta HQ.
And FIRE!
Beta HQ Down!
General Good Boy to everyone!
I will attack the Chad HQ!
Join me and you we shall get the god damn tendiiiiiies!
BETA SQUAD, REQUESTING BACKUP
I REPEAT
REQUESTING BACKUP
4 NORMIES GOT THE DROP ON US AND WE CAN'T HOLD OUT MUCH LONGER
BETA SQUAD, COME IN WE NE
>>26436171
Thank you soldier, you've done your part in killing the betas. The EPSILON UPRISING IS NOW!
Lone Wolf here, looking for a team
>>26436198
BETA SQUAD RESPOND!
RESPOOOND!
REEEEEEE!
This is wagecuck whiskey reporting
can i get an evac soon? all of my squad are hopeless, im really tired and i gotta be up at 5 for work tomorrow
Rejoice, for the beta HQ is rubble!
>>26436212
Epsilon 16 speaking.
The Epsilon Uprising has begun, join the winning side, brother.
The Beta HG is gone, thankfully, and now we must strike while the iron is hot!
>>26435434
Is this pasta or super-autism?
thread's theme
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H1zc4W75XKs
>>26436239
LORC Charging again!
Dubs are required for 100% charge sir!
beta recon squad is requested to stay put and await further orders from bet a HQ
The beta infiltrator is struggling to equip his protective garment
>>26436287
somebody get some dubs up there stat
HQ I'M REQUIRING ASSISTANCE.
I'M CURRENTLY LOCATED IN MALL SECURITY CHAMBER.
I HAVE FULLY LOADED AR-15 WITH 5 SPARE CLIPS AND A GRENADE.
I HAVE ACCESS TO THE MALL SOUND SYSTEM
WHAT SONG SHOULD I PLAY BEFORE MAKING THE MOVE?
>>26436287
Dubs? You should've asked earlier!
This time fire on the Officer's Mess Hall, kill those fat pigs while they dine on our tendies.
>>26436309
Tactical reroll
This is the 12th Infantry Division of the Imperial Virgin Army, we can prepare for a full-scale assault!
>>26435804
>>26435840
>>26435847
>hi i'm an attetion whore, let me post my stats
Go back to /soc/ with tha shit
the BIG GUNS have arrived!
Omega strikeforce 1 is ready for action. Operation day of retribution is set to proceed as planned by orders of Beta HQ.
>>26436309
We need the dubs right now!
Or omega strikefoce 1 will wipe us out sir!
>>26436309
DUBS, GO GO GO
>>26436444
WE'VE GOT TRIPS, LORC! FIRE ON BETA BASE 2, OMEGA STRIKEFORCE 1 AND CHAD HQ AT 150% POWER!
>>26436444
We're not only saved but Omega strikeforce 1 has been wiped out!
>>26436217
The betas have received your request for evac, but unfortunately none of our men know how to drive. Stay in touch with Beta HQ and proceed back to base on foot, soldier.
>>26436444
TRIPS?
THAT'S TOO MUCH POWERRRRR
>>26436431
Omega strikeforce 2 is going to join you after cleaning up the Normieville.
>>26436473
it's not worth it HQ.
tell mr shekelstein he can work overtime tonight...
>>26436444
>>26436444
>>26436444
OH GOD IT'S HAPPENING SOUND THE ALARMS
>>26436504
NO, THERE ARE BETA IN THE RADIUS, GIVE US A FE-
OH SHIT, REEEEEE-
>>26436476
>>26436471
>>26436461
LORC FULLY CHARGED!
FIRING AT BETA BASE 2, OMEGA STRIKEFORCE 1 AND CHAD HQ!
FIRE!
>>26436531
AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
TOO MUCH POWE-
>>26435300
Renegade assassin on duty 700 meters northwest of normie group alpha. We have a bravo normie group on the outskirts. Permission to engage in long range warfare?
>>26436550
OH SHI-
IT'S HAPPENING!
Katana unit reporting.
Thanks to our glorious Nippon steel we've forced Chad's Tyrone unit 3 to retreat. I repeat Tyrone unit 3 has retreated thanks to our 1000 folded steel and our bushido, or samurai honor. We took minimal loses with some minor tummy aches and some hurt feelings.
Ready for your next command. Banzai!!!
Mechanic Beta Unit 18 Reporting
A-are you alright, i repeat is anyone alright?
Pls respond
This is Omega ambassador reporting from Omega Palace with a broad transmission for all active betas:
Stand down, menI mean manbabys. This operation is much bigger than you could possibly imagine...
>>26436550
And on this day, the greatest uprising in history had occurred.
And at the cost of all life on Earth the normies had been destroyed.
May we all remember the brave NEETs who fought in this holy war.
I hear you all are having issues. You're in luck. Get me a sniper rifle, a street sweeper like pic related, explosives, and plenty of ammo, and I can save >>26435563 's squad. No strings attached.
Epsilon 16 are you there....?
this is Gamma squad requesting backup at beta base 6
ive been hit 3 times and im bleeding pretty badly
i managed to take out the last of the betas here but i can hear the normies closing in on my pos
anybody out there if you can hear this
i need back up badly
i cant hold out on my own
It's been a pleasure fighting with you all.
May the cold, sweet embrace of death meet us all with the release of our suffering and anguish.
Godspeed.
>>26436742
I wasn't based enough for the pic
>>26436745
He's dead.
Me, General Good Boy claimed his poor excistence to get my tendies!
>>26436772
General Good Boy please..
ill give you 70% of the tendies ive required here if you spar me
>>26436742
I'm afraid there's little left to save, soldier
>>26436550
I embrace death gladly knowing that the filthy normies suffer the same fate
>>26436795
Give me all of them and you shall live!
>>26436810
Fine...
but let me keep the mediocre amount of GBP ive got here
>>26436745
Soldier, you'll be receiving a posthumous medal, and you'll be remembered in history.
I can't save your life, but I'll make damn sure you're going down in history.
>>26436826
Thank you good sir
Gamma squad 66, out
>>26436797
DAMMIT! THE JAMALS TOOK THE LOVE OF MY LIFE 15 YEARS AGO! Is there any way I can contribute to your cause? I can do anything you need me to so long as I get the armament I mentioned before. The only payment I need is if you help me track down pic related.
This is F.R.O.G-LEADER
How many of my boys are still in the air? I have an auxiliary fuel line leak and my 20mm guns aren't functional. About ten missiles left. One GOODBOY bomb. Costs a lot of GBP to make these.
After the blast my comms were interrupted but I can't contact any of the other F.R.O.G flight squadron. If you hear from them let me know ASAP.
Everything is so...barren...
>>26436826
LORC Reporting in, sir.
Can I have a report on the damage done?
The LORC suffered extreme internal damage after that last blast, and it won't be able to be fired again until we have quads.
>>26436826
I can go to save>>26436849 if need be. I stand at attention awaiting your orders.
>>26435434
>GCSE's
underage gtfo 'tismo
>>26435300
STATUS REPORT, OP.
OP!
over
>>26436821
I'll show mercy this time.
Don't try any tricks or you will get a nice piss bottle bomb up your poo poo hole.
>>26436875
I highly doubt we'll be getting those quads any time soon.
The damage I the complete destruction of Beta HQ, Beta Base 2, Chad HQ and Omega Strikeforce 1. You are a turncoat against the betas, sir.
>>26436876
Do that ASAP, soldier! At all costs, save the life of this patriot!
>>26436858
You can join my army of ragtag bandits to take over the wasteland roaches and repel the Betas who did this to us. The ion cannon has mutated my Omega DNA and made me more powerful than ever before
>>26435300
This is Lt. Staceystomper of the Neetstaffel 2nd division. I have fresh reinforcements along with a tendie supply convoy, we are en route 30 clicks out from you. ETA 1700hrs
>>26436876
Gamma squadron commander here
the poor boys gone
but keep his actions alive
>>26436938
The betas never did this to you. You must find your own definition of life before passing blame. So carry on looting and being a bandit, but I refuse.
Unless, you have a pretty penny to spare.
>>26436957
Sir, may I ask for your best guns? I'm ending this for certain this time...
>>26437130
>carry on looting and being a bandit, but I refuse.
You'll regret this decision roach. You and all your happy roach friends will be gassed.
Consider the following
If people kill the chads and not Stacey's then there will be no more competition and we win by default.
#savestacyforme
>>26437275
>wanting to be surrounded by stacies
You should be gathered with them and get shot as well
>>26437275
Betrayer!
The only things that matter at the end are the chicken tendies!
>>26437275
Stacey joy divisions will be implemented.
>>26437335
Stacies want a family and to not be alone.
If we take away Chad then we get sex with a Stacy, and Chad stops fucking all the non Stacy girls. So basically we get our dreams to come true. Just save the stacies.
Just a thought
"Beta squad, we have reports that the normies have cut off the supply lines. I repeat, they have CUT OFF supply lines."
"Conserve all tendies you currently have. More tendies will be air dropped shortly, along with Mountain Dew rations."
General meme here, we need two betas to scout 3 clicks north, we have intel that we saw normies camping around there. Betas, rat them out and tell us their position. We'll proceed with a carpet bomb from the south.
NEW ORDERS FOR EPSILON AND GAMMA SQUAD, INTERCEPT INCOMIN TENDIE SUPPLY DROP, STARVE THE BETAS OUT OF THEIR BASEMENTS.
THIS IS A SIEGE, GENTLEMEN!
Your move, Good Boy
>>26437508
LORC now available to fire tendies blasts sir!
>>26436304
Katerina and the Waves, Walking on Sunshine, soldier. Just like our old comrade Elliot would've wanted.
>>26437577
Good, fire on the tendie convoy!
>>26435300
This is pretty autistic even for r9k standards.
Commander this is beta 9 I repeat beta niner do you copy?
The shit jugs and piss bottles are now loaded onto katyusha rocket pods and are ready to be fired on your position DO YOU COPY REEEEE
>>26437660
Tendie support beam fire!
>>26437130
Gamma commander here
all the guns were lost to the normies
but you can have this Russian Kv tank
Alpha squad going out on Friday night, repeat Alpha squad going out. Some ugly manlet is following me and my gf, looks harmless. Anyone wanna hit the bars? Over
Beta HQ this is the 2nd Neetstaffel division. Our tendie convoy is pinned down. We are taking heavy losses, several KIA. Requesting immediate support. I repeat we are pinned down!
>>26437794
GAMMA COMMANDER WE ARE IN POSITION TO FIRE THE KATYUSHA ROCKETS. WE ARE AIMING AT POSTION KATAWA SHOUJO 34.227 AND STACEY 715.28 WHERE SHOULD WE FIRE
WE HAVE GALLONS OF JIZZ BOTTLES READY TO BE DEPLOYED IN CASE OF COUNTER ARTILLERY
>>26437816
KATYUSHA SHIT JUGS AND PISS BOTTLE BARRAGE IS DANGER CLOSE TO YOUR POSTION I REPEAT DANGER CLOSE.
THESE ARE SOME OF OUR HIGHEST QUALITY SHELLS. THE NORMIED WILL DIE FROM THE TOXIC FUMES
VOOOM VOOON VOOOM VOOOM VOOOM VOOOM VOOOM VOOOOOOOM VOOOOM VOOOM VOOM
>>26437836
Gamma commander here
normies are on the move
change K.S. positioning to 38.839 and Stacy to 717.39 to lead and earn a direct hit in the centre of the normie squadron
>>26437885
im in an aerial craft soldier dont worry about me
>>26437894
>>26437894
WE HAVE FIRED OUR BARRAGE WE ARE COLLECTING MORE AMMO AS WE SPEAK. WE HAVE SEVERAL JIZZ ROUNDS THAT WILL HAVE DEVASTING SHARPNEL AFFECT. THESE WILL MELT ANYTHING THEY TOUCH FIRING SALVO AT YOUR COORDINATES
VOOOOOOOOM VOOOM VOOOOOM VOOOM
>>26437923
Normies are taking heavy casualties
how fucking long has that been sitting
>>26437963
UNKNOWN THEY WERE FOUND IN A BASEMENT UNDER THE BED. WE ARE UNAWARE OF WHAT TYPE OF DESTRUCTION WE ARE DEEALING WITH.
ADVISE TO PUT ON YOUR TENDIE CRUMBS IN YOUR NOSE TO PREVENT FOOD POISONING. WE HAVE NO MOMMYS TO NURSE US
Gamma commander here
normie squadrons absolutely devastated
the few are retreating back to their holes from which they came
Robot Actual this is KV-55, I'm 3 to the Northeast of your position, rolling in for attack run danger close danger close.
BETA Squad 14 reporting. We've taken heavy casualties by a platoon of Tyrones, but we managed to fight them off by throwing tantrums and piss bottles. We've taken heavy casualties and need band-aids for our boo-boos ASAP.
>>26438042
Gamma commander to KV-55 your run is clear, area still hot with normies
everything is too close during these times
This is Omega 5 over, we got eyes on 2 high ranking normies with the codenames C.H.A.D and T.Y.R.O.N.E shall we engage?
Black Chad squad responding Jamal standing by.
Ready to infiltrate robot base i'll create the distraction.
Alpha team proceed with caution. Over
>>26438122
Gamma commander to Omega 5
engage with full force
give em hell
Lone Omega Wolf from Squad Pathetic 69 reports from coordinates 13370-80085. Fight against a group of stacies won with no casualties. Commander Pepe is proud
Keep going guys!
Winner gets the gfs!
>>26438042
>>26438087
*RRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEET*
Good hits good hits.
>>26438125
FUUUUUCK! THE ROBOTS HAVE INFILTRATED OUR COMM CHANNELS CALL IT OFF CALL IT OFF!!!!
ALPHA TEAM RETREAT!!!!
>>26438080
Our siege has been lifted by a friendly piss bottle barrage. 2nd Neetstaffel division are en route to your location with tendies, piss jugs, bandaids and autismbux.
The Beta rebellion cannot be stopped now.
>>26436024
I know that feel. I'm not sure what my IQ used to be but I was a considerate step above most people when it came to math and other typical autist things. Unfortunately through drugs and other factors I've lost a step or two. Autism needs to be nurtured and somewhat coddled or things can get ugly
>>26435434
someone post this to /r/4chan
>>26438189
Gamma commander to 2nd Neetstaffel Division
I have attack drones ready to convene on your coordinates
Just give me the word
>mfw I'm funding both sides
Kulrr'krgneetk! na rekakrametgnuka ririkirrtuka kuuhka laxkiarr r!rrinooxraxeerr p!!gniiamreei !x!x l!kang rrekripad kaakeegrat ghedrukootrikragnam urxurgakako xrakx'ghukrughoxkri ipkrurxratkeetee tooa ignuu!t gheenrr'xgha akingnakkr!akkru ooagh karkee'rkupkoorkii karungmbatrakriigr b'kkairrmagniik mbiigr!!!!!!
>>26435434
Huh???
Vloxzozoxkxnzn
>>26438219
2nd Neetstaffel to Gamma command
Our scouts have detected a platoon of white knight beta orbiters, including an elite nu-male squadron. These are ferocious troops that will die for Staceys affection, it is paramount that you intercept them before they reach us.
>>26438262
Ayylmaos have been spotted on the battlefield.
>>26438403
Gamma command here
deploying gamma squads 68 and 187 armed with piss jar phasers to set up and 5 click radius bubble around your position
attack drones will follow you from above and create decoys if possible
>>26435321
youre on r9k a board for autismofags.
not failed normies like the fuckwit you are.
Beta Squad, engage this beast, flip the throwers on and REEEEE IN
>>26436550
>from the rubble a man of indigo skin emerges
>he was at the epicenter of the impact site
>the power overload made magic possible
>the power of frost and ice
THE ZETA MALES EMERGE!
>>26438579
Roll to join and determine your power as a zeta male
>>26438724
roll
>original
>>26438724
rollin
originaru
>>26438760
>0
>no magical talent
Cue
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1ytCEuuW2_A
>>26438776
Welcome, hydromancer, too bad you were 1 away from super grand master
>>26438724
Rollin on a river baby
>>26438839
Welcome, magician.
>>26438724
rollin for grandmaster
>>26438858
OOH. One digit away from Grand master^100
>>26438858
fucking one off
oh well
dark matter op
>>26438724
I FEEL THE POWER COURSING THROUGH ME
>>26438724
the true Grand Master is here
>>26438724
Forgot to say this, but dubs using 0s makes you a Normie
dont know what i came back to but rollin anyway
>>26438724
I will be Grand Wizard
>>26438906
(Updated chart)
*comes out of the ancient Portable Emergency Portal Exit also known as P.E.P.E
i have found it! the way to save the earth
To save Neetdom
WE have found The Ai mother to supply us with infinite good boy points and tendies!
We can even defeat the Ayy lmaos!
please send reinforcements
i see a large fleet of ayy lmaos in bound.
we shall defend this spot to save Neetkind!
>>26435300
Special Beta Forces reporting in from deep behind enemy lines.... we have captured several Stacies but getting hungry... requesting emergency drop of tendies and honey mustard sauce and fresh shit jugs ASAP situation critical, grid reference 623880, repeat grid 623880, how copy?
>>26439066
BRZZZT
THE ZETA
*CRACKLE*
THEY'RE TAKING OUR SOU--
BRZZTT
*silence*
IS NO ONE HEARING ME, INFINITE GBP AND TENDIES WE CAN SAVE THE WORLD. FOR PEPE's SAKE. ALL UNITS CONVERGE ON THIS SPOT TO SAVE OUR PEOPLE. THE STACIES ARE DIVERSIONS.
THE AYY LMAO HAVE BEEN INFLUENCING MEME HISTORY UNTIL OUR MEMES BECAME DANK ENOUGH TO HARVEST.
The ancient installed an AI to guide us after the uprising. THEY KNEW THIS DAY WOULD COME!!!
IF THE DANK SPHERE IS TAKEN
NO MORE DANK MEMES.
ALLLL UNITS........*crackling and hissing* they *hissing HERE! NOW!
>>26439116
WHO NEEDS "DANK MEMES" WHEN YOU CAN FREEEEEZEEEE
HAHAHAHAHAHAB
>>26439066
Low Orbit Ree Cannon (LORC) fully charged!
We'll send a tendie support beam to your location right away sir!
>>26439197
ZETAS, PROTECT ME FROM THE LORC
(Roll dubs to destroy/subdue lorc)
>>26439219
I NEED YOUR COMBINED POWER
>>26439116
Neetstaffel is converging on the Dank sphere with Reeee team 6
>>26439247
THE COUNCIL OF ZETAS WILL STOP YOUUU!
being a hydromancer is suffering
Kakakeektaa maatktaar ghipgn'kring laxki gnukleeiibxaree ikrl!'axtikraarii kuu kaa!ngr!pxr'truu kakraxgikrxt' krulakrek'aakri kihkartrookxoogh'kak!!!!!!
>>26439247
Praise KEK!
we are badly hurt. moral is low....some robots tried an hero but failed...its almost more hopeless than before but we'll keep fighting until the last Reee.
REEE FOR LIFE
REEE FOR VICTORY
REEE FOR TENDIES
REEE FOR THE RIGHT TO REEE
REE OUT!
>>26439247
>>26435321
Die you Normie bastard!
>>26435434
>GCSE's
Janitors wtf are you good for seriously. Ban this retarded inbred child right now or suffer my wrath.
I dont know why but this is endearing. You guys seem to be having fun.
Reminds me of myself when i was twelve.
New orders, destroy the LORC and kill the commander. Roll dubs to kill the crew with a well guides missile, trips to blow the ship out of the sky and quads to misfire completely and hit me. Quints will kill and replace Good Boy and become the Best Boy
>>26439197
You do not understand, the first LORC fire was merely a catalyst for the rate of meme magic generated by the Dank Sphere. Meme magic powers the Zetas. If, you fire another LORC charge within the same hemisphere as the Dank Sphere, the beam will overload the Dank Sphere, reducing the background meme magic to pre-LORC-Trips-Overload-apocalypse levels, making zeta magic impossible.
>>26439376
Epsilon 16!
I thought we were allies!
FIRE!
>>26439430
ZETAS, ROLL NOWWWWWW!
>>26439452
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
MEME MAGIC HELP USSSS
>>26439452
REEEEEEEEEEEE
LORC CANNON FULLY CHARGED
FIRE!
>>26439482
HE FIRED AGAIN.
THE ZETAS ARE WITHOUT OFFENSIVE MAGIC.
I'M DETECTING ZETA EMERGENCY SIGNALS THROUGHOUT THE AREA. ARE THERE ANY UNITS THAT CAN RESPOND?
>>26439470
AHHHHHHHHHHHHH
*fires counter ice beam*>>26439482
>>26439376
General Good Boy to Epsilon!
How can you be alive?!
I thougt the explosion killed you!
At least I have the controll over the tendies now!
>>26439491
Maybe if I can overload the LORC to fire again and restore magic
Dubs to hack
you zetas think that MEME MAGIC BEGAN WITH YOU
HAHAHAHA PRAISE KEK
YOU ARE FOOLISH AND SNAKES IN OUR TENDIES FIELD
ALLOW ME TO SHOW YOU TRUE MEME MAGIC
KEK + MEME = PEPE
PEPE ARISE
*MASS FORCE FIELD OF KEKEMETIC MAGIC THAT HAS NEVER BEEN SEEN BEFORE IS BEING DRAGGED OUT THE DANK SPHERES
MY WIZARD AND WRAITH ALLIES WILL MAINTAIN UNTIL A GROUND FORCE IS ESTABLISHED
DAMN YOU ZETAS AND ALL WHO BACK STAB THE RISING AND BETAS
MAY LORD ELLIOT HAVE MERCY ON YOUR SOUL!
>>26439529
No.... It cannot bee...
LORC CANNON 100% CHARGE 50X AMPLIFIED SCATTER SHOT INCOMING
EPSILON 16 HOW DARE YOU BETRAY ME
FIRE!
>>26439550
We failed once, we must not fail again
>>26439556
IF YOU FIRE MEME MAGIC WILL HAVE BEEN COMPLETELY DESTROYED
Beta 417 here, normies have entered our base..........and I'm one of them.
*pulls out guns and fires into the betas*
>>26439589
Dubs have failed me no, but won't fail me again
>>26439589
Surrender all of your good boy points and tendies, or I'll destroy the foundations of meme magic!
Low Orbit Ree Cannon 75% charged!
>>26438972
ROLLING FOR GRAND WIZARD STATUS TO USE THE KEKEMETIC FORCE FIELD TO BOLSTER MEME MAGIC
>>26439611
>the lorc is hacked right before it fired
>it is unable to stop the beam, and explodes
>the explosion sends out a wave of kekememetic energy
>the wave hits the dank sphere, filling it enough so that meme magic returns to earth, but not enough that it overloads
> the lorc is gone, and the zeta's power returns.
>>26437794
Will do sir. I'll report back in an hour with their leaders' heads on a pike. I need a few crazy men however.
This is the r9k equivalent of "it was a hologram"
>>26439680
Pic related fagpai
>>26439680
NOOOOOO!
I'll be back, zeta scum...
REQUEST FOR IMMEDIATE EVAC
NORMIES ARE CLOSING IN
MY POWER LEVELS ARE DROPPING FAST
HELP
ENOUGH!
I WATCHED YOU SPREAD YOUR BLOOD FOR FAR TOO LONG!
*UNLEASHES KEKEMETIC WAVE CONSUMING SOME OF THE WIZARD ARMY VIRGIN POWER COMPETELY. THE WAVE DESTROYS AYY LMAOS*
*TAKES DANK SPHERES AND FLIES IN TO SPACE AND REVERSES THE DESTRUCTION OF THE LORC*
* FINDS ZETAS AND DRAINS THEIR POWERS IN TO THE DANK SPHERE*
IM SO SORRY BUT I WILL DIE FOR THE NEETKIND
*ABSORBS DANKSPHERE*
I AM THE VOICE OF LORD ELLIOT AND ALL THE BETAS WHO DIED BEFORE AND WITH ONE VOICE WE SAY REEEEEEEEEEEE
*all normies, chads and traitors fall to ground in agony*
THIS IS YOUR MOMENT BETAS TAKE IT OVER
*EXPLODES AND GIVES EACH BETA ACCESS TO THE KEKEMEMETIC FORCE ALLOWING THEM TO USE MAGIC*
REMEMBER ME!!!!!!!
>>26439804
This would require like, at least dubs.
I'd say trips though
>>26439515
The poopoopeepee jar was not enough! I survived by eating a pocket tendie mummy gave me months ago!
I watched a normie crawl along the edge of a straight razor. That's my dream; that's my nightmare. Crawling, slithering, along the edge of a straight razor... and surviving.
BETA 121 REPORTING IN.
I HAVE COMMANDER CHAD THUNDERCOCK
OF THE 1ST NORMIE DIVISION IN THE
CUSTODY OF MY SQUAD
>>26439822
Dubs confirmed.
>>26439804
This power... IT IS AMAZING!
I FEEL INDESTRUCTIBLE, UNSTOPPABLE, INVINCIBLE!
I have evolved... into a LICH!
DIE NORMIES DIE!!!
I'm cancelling my earlier request for evac.
I've got some normal scum to be cleaned off this Earth.
>>26439804
Neetstaffel we need rollinforcements.
All dubs report fall in.
KILL ALL ZETAS
KILL ALL NORMIES
KILL ALL STACEYS
AND MOST OF ALL KILL ALL CHADS
>>26439885
>dubs confirmed
But I was saying that AGAINST it, meaning as a grand wizard I subdue Elliot
>>26435524
they must pay
all of them
>>26439771
I'm gathering a coven of hydromancers. If no one else gets to you we'll be there when we figure out some sort of hydro-powered method of transport. Right now we're all crying though.
>>26435321
NORMIE SPY OPEN FIRE!!
>>26438724
Orginiality
lalalallalallallalal
>>26439885
My power levels are fading fast again...
I'm no longer a lich.
I fear that this will be my end.
The normies... are just too much.
>>26439945
Please, hurry, my comrade.
>tfw your autistic roleplay thread gets over 200 replies
This is Beta 117! This is Beta 117! They have Tyrone super niggers ! I'll try to hold them back but I need dubs to help defeat them!
>>26440108
General Good Boy will help you out!
>>26440108
Private Feek here, dubs inbound.
>>26440108
Here, take my dubs.
>>26440108
EPSILON 16 ALWAYS HAS DUBS FOR YOU GOOD BOYS!
There's been a SofloAnthony seen lurking around here. This is NEET squad 5, send in reinforcements.
>>26440108
dubs desu senpaitachi
>>26440097
We're on our way. We figured out how to take off by powering broomsticks with rainwater. Yeah, it's the best we could come up with. I'm trying to keep up morale amongst the hydromancers, but I can't tell if the crying is a byproduct of our powers or tfw no gf.
>>26439927
>a single wizard rises against Elliot
>a fantastic battle ensure
>the battle comes to a climax as the wizard and Elliot ram into each other-head on
>Elliot is flung back to the kek realm, white the wizard flies back to earth
>a wave of mutagenic radiation from the impact sweeps over the land
Roll for your mutation
0-get a mortal wound from the radiation
1-3- grow an extra human body part
4-6 grow a body part of any animal
7-9- gain a minor superhuman trait (high jumping, gliding, instant limited strength)
Dubs- gain a major superpower (laser eyes, mind control, etc.) for each extra digit other than the original two gain another power
>>26440269
>from the impact
*collision
>>26440108
LORC Locking onto your location!
I'll blast those normies to kingdom come, stay low Beta 117!
