>oh that's your dick?
>what's that thing over the end of it!?
edition
cara.
little uncut brit dicks BTFO
>>60160396
your mouth luv
>>60160396
>cutfaggots
hello, israeleddit!
>>60160418
>tfw my 20,000 pics of cara got deleted
I HAD A DREAM MY LIFE WOULD BE
Did a leave vote lads
>>60162480
doing my best
>>60160950
howcome
Rape black men in their huge arse
:3
>they actually thought I'd let the plebes drag us out the EU
>>60162128
disregard this post. i suck cocks.
>>60162457
Tibetans are poor innocent mountain sages living simple wholesome lives
Europeans are vile twisted devils who need their lives controlled and dominated by a powerful liberal elite in order to not do anything naughty
>>60162443
Why do kippers hate civil liberties and common law?
I'll post about this when they've been proven guilty, not when they've been accused
good lads
>>60162511
where does it say /brit/
>>60162511
You fucked it up
Just seen a Brexit advert.
>>60162511
Fail lad
>>60162511
nice subject, fuckhead
>>60162511
trump shit is boring, especially when its Europeans on about it
>>60162573
FOY
>>60162575
>she
>black
nuke this planet
>>60162575
thumbnail made it look like she'd pissed herself
Anyone else doing that £50 million bet thing?
>>60162575
IS THAT CARA
LOL
FUCK CARALAD
FUCK YOU
>>60162511
Haha
No
>>60162575
>Nigel's on suicide watch
ITS OVER.
>>60162556
tbf it seems everyone hates those things these days, even the so called Tories have eroded our civil liberties further
>>60162612
rude
>Why yes I am a Tory
To the lad talking about the velius hairs or whatever. It'd good that I have them, right?
>Hi there anon, thanks for applying for the vacancy of My Boyfriend. As my prospective boyfriend, what can you offer me in the relationship department that no one else can? What are your strengths? Bear in mind that I'm also talking to four other lads that are interested in this vacancy!
>>60162637
Didn't mean to start that with "tbf"
Daily reminder Cara cucked Johnny Depp
finger bang bang, bang bang bang
finger bang bang, bang bang bang
im gonna finger bang you into my life
>>60162638
dumb niggerlover
>>60162671
I think so, I don't know
They're meant to turn to terminal hairs after puberty
>>60162575
fake
we all know cara plays xbox
>>60162693
Literally nothing.
>>60162693
fuck off slut
>one chance in life
>born with an essex accent
>mfw that fucking lisp on my "s" sounds
>tfw no effy gf
>>60162693
Crushing depression and an overall pessimistic outlook on my life
A-and you?
Official England line up against Wales
>>60162705
hey schlomo, you're cut arent you?
>been working loads lately
>had no time to do anything
>take sandwiches to work 90% of time with some fruit and other bits and bobs
>run out of bread
>don't realise until yesterday night
>ask my mum to call and get me some today
>OH YEAH, UMMM, OK, IF I GET TIME
>she doesn't have a job
>all she does is clean the house, take my brother to school and chill with her friends
>thinks being a full time mum is the hardest job in the world
>complains about getting no sleep and all that bollocks
>only lives 15 minutes away
>get home
>no bread
>mfw
Should mention that I've been biking to work past couple months so can't really call on the way home as I've nowhere to put it and nowhere to put my bike
>>60162706
Rude yank
>>60162693
eggs
>>60162705
its ninjare bang bang m8
>>60162738
>clyne
>white
>>60162761
>ethan and reddit
fuck off
>>60162693
i'm circumsised
>>60162738
>tfw my Dad is so depressing I call him Negativatron
>tfw all he talks about is Nazi shit and Muslims
I'm anti Muslim as anyone but it's all he fucking talks about.
>>60162786
>/brit/
>American
How about you fuck off.
>>60160418
I always see you spamming on /brit/ threads "Cara" and whatnot. Kill yourself.
>>60162710
It's been 10 years dammit!
But I have a really strong chin and mustache growth. It's fully matured and not whispy or anything. Just my cheeks are lacking, so I'm trying to hurry them on.
got the old thread open just in case janny does his nut
twirl vs twix
>>60162693
This is actually how yanks date each other
>>60162848
How old are you, and hows your diet
> he's cut
> sex is 4 times less pleasurable for him
Sounds goods this cut buisness lads
>>60162738
I'm bored of Hodgson now. Steve Evans IN
finna get high dudes
>>60162693
>also you need 5 years experience of being in a relationship + a degree
>he greentexts wrong
>he prepends a space to the greentexted text
Sounds good this being new business lads
>>60162693
Very funny
>>60162838
Vai se fuder seu preto de merda.
Se mate.
>>60162781
Jenko > clyne
>>60162880
27 and good.
I'm not dumb i freakin work 4 jobs and i'm an ifbb certified instructor kick boxer and there you are making fun of me calling me puddinghead
How do we feel about this?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VN4ngHco5sE
>>60162693
I have avoidant personality disorder so I have trouble thinking of positive things to say about myself, stop triggering.
Had to tell the doctor I was a virgin. Very embarrassing considering I'm 24
>>60162805
My dads a typical working class Tory that's only slightly racist desu
>there are over 200 million British people worldwide
>>60162943
if he's so good why ent he been called up haha
>>60162884
Sometimes I'll have a wank when I've been outside in the cold or just got out of a cold shower and my cock is much, much less sensitive and the climax is fucking trash. This must be how it is to be cut.
I honestly don't think I'd bother wanking if I was cut.
I have a history degree from Cambridge. Do not fucking argue with me.
>>60162838
i;ll smash the fuck out of ya scrawny banana eating shithouse
apologise
>>60162962
I feel that I shouldn't be seeing the same link in two different threads
>>60162976
Cos woys an idiot
>>60162966
what was that for?
>>60162977
couldn't imagine having to use lube just to wank
>>60162966
Why the fuck did you have to tell him that? If they ask if you're sexually active, just say you haven't had sex in the last 6 months or something.
Did he laugh at you?
>>60162985
>Cambridge
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
>>60162962
why are korean girls such bad dancers?
>>60162953
>27
my condolences
nothing you can do but pray to allah
>>60162966
i don't get embarrassed about being a virgin, i get embarrassed about being a neet
feeling chilly lads
>>60163016
colonoscopy x
>>60162974
doubt
>>60162693
actually despise that woman without having met her
>>60162977
Can't imagine what it'd be like to be uncut. Sex feels pretty good already, but I guess you can't miss what you never had.
>>60162943
Jenko is hurt
>>60163033
And shove this Minoxidil on my face, of course.
>>60162934
Tome no meio de seu cu seu filho da puta, nordestino, preto arrombado
Vai agüentar três picas no rabo viado do caralho, vai se impalar com uma lança seu imbecil. Pega pó que nem açúcar mete no cú do teu avô e se foda.
>>60163032
How well do you dance in high heels?
>>60163067
[this triggers the yank]
>tfw 6'4 and built like a brick shithouse
if everyone on /brit/ was put in a steel cage and forced to fight to the death I would easily be the last man standing, genuinely
i sit here sometimes looking at the smart arse posts you little students and neets make and just chuckle to myself because if you ever said anything like that to my face (as if you would dare) you could literally be eating pavement in under a second
think on
>>60163066
weirdo
>>60163020
>If they ask if you're sexually active, just say you haven't had sex in the last 6 months or something
I didn't realise you can just say that. fuck
>>60163067
>I guess you can't miss what you never had.
Tell that to /r9k/.
>>60162985
>history
Makes me sad knowing how many civilisations muzzies have destroyed haha
This triggers the yank.
>>60163110
white women can do it fine
YOU constantly obsess over Japan and Japanese Girls.
Japan and Japanese Girls NEVER think of Britain and British Men.
>>60162988
I'm sorry for being blunt. Sorry for being against images which erect peckers for wanking purposes.
>>60163118
That's why the internet is such a wonderful invention m8
>>60163135
>>60163118
i know karate m8
>>60163130
a life of unlimited attention from boys have left her narcissistic in the extremes desu
steady lad
>>60163118
>think on
love this phrase.
>>60163118
>implying we wouldnt just kill you first like a pack of jackals
you didn't wake me up lads, it's been 2 hours
who's he shortest here?
5'7 here
Think I've made my decision on the referendum
>>60163146
kinder is fucking delicious
nothing quite like it
>>60163147
Lmao. Are you implying that white people can dance? AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
>>60163159
GREMIO GREMIO GREMIO
doing my best
>>60163183
where are you getting this from?
think on
suck ma fucking dick biiiitch
>>60163093
Se mate
Look mum I posted it again
https://desustorage.org/_/search/text/tfw%206%274%20and%20built%20like%20a%20brick%20shithouse/
>>60163147
Pretty sure dancing in high heels is unique to kpop
>>60163159
not to me, to caralad
>>60163064
if you want to include the rest of the Irish it jumps up to like 300 million
genuinely do not see the appeal of putting your face anywhere near a girl's fanny or bum
>>60163203
I'm 5'8 and so is my gf like. Not a bad life at all
No townsend in the England Squad.
Oh well, I guess it's one less black guy.
>>60163203
i'm 5'5
>>60163236
all me
I'm 3'6.
>if everyone on /brit/ was put in a steel cage and forced to fight to the death I would easily be the last man standing, genuinely
>i sit here sometimes looking at the smart arse posts you little students and neets make and just chuckle to myself because if you ever said anything like that to my face (as if you would dare) you could literally be eating pavement in under a second
>think on
>>60163142
>>60163114
Losing sensation isn't what bothers me, I just don't like the aesthetics of my dick.
>Ah yes. Lets leave the EU to cap the number of white European migrants only to have them be replaced by blacks and pakistanis. VERY impressive.
>>60163261
A FUCKING LEAF
>>60163203
71.5 inches
>>60163208
am white, get complimented on my dancing often and have pulled exactly 2 ethnic girls after they approached me to compliment my dancing
so fuck off with your racist sterotypes lad
>>60163269
yeh logically its a bit weird to want to get close to orifices which expel piss, shit, methane, blood, mucus and human beings but sex aint logical tbf lad.
why is pandora even in this show she literally makes me want to throw up and turn the tv off every time she's onscreen
>>60163345
>>60163233
stop putting spiders in bananas
>>60163203
Poleaboo is 5'4
>>60163146
>95p
BREXIT NOW
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hawaii_2
I own 1 sq. ft of this island, gonna live there and just learn to sleep standing up
>>60163261
are we including yanks who say
"yeah im britsh or yeah im irish"
or people who were actually born in the british isles
>>60162738
get Sven back
>>60163338
Looks like a private detective mulling over the details of a case that's been plaguing him for months.
is 5'7 non-gf height?
never had a gf before but im not a virgin
>summer
FUCK WHERE. Fuck this dreary, depressing cunt of a country.
If I didn't have a decent job I would move somewhere warm. I FUCKING HATE how miserable and shit it is all the time.
>lads go away 5+ times a year
>cheap flights
>cheap hotel
>get hammered
>beach during the day
>fanny during the night
Why not.
>drinky not in the squad
>>60163388
all British diaspora worldwide (not including RoI)
>>60163428
was hot all last week mate
>>60163231
>where are you getting this from?
you are a naive retard and I've got to say, I like that about you, don't ever change you mouthbreathing beta orbiter
think on
I just want to fall asleep with a girl's head on my chest, feeling the heat of her body and the warmth of her breath on my skin.
Any man out tonight?
Got 4 cans of supers for pres
>>60163428
it's Spring atm
>>60163493
>Any man out tonight?
fuck off yank
>>60163421
i have a m8 who's 5'7 who's had a few gfs and one even let him do anal
on the other hand i'm 6'2 and a virgin
>>60163196
This to be honest
Why do we get the urge to shag average women?
For example, I'm a decent looking guy and have shagged some beautiful girls but I still get the urge to shag average women, even when I've been with my good looking exes I've been tempted to fuck some mongs.
>>60163428
Boiling and sunny all day everyday here
Can you actually get a job as a private detective IRL? Sounds like a proper bants job.
>>60163481
It's pretty good but sometimes their breath smells
>Irish are rated as the "worlds sexiest nationality"
>>60163520
its natural to want to sow your seed
>>60163559
Yank, FUCK OFF.
>>60163500
that's a chav thing to say, not yank
>I'm a decent looking guy
>>60163481
bit gay really
>>60163566
FOY
*adds a small amount of LSD to the runts' water supply*
hahah... hahahaha HAHAHAHAHA
>>60163520
i feel like ive had super attractive women look down on me for so long that im unable to find them attractive in the same way as say a 7 or 8 out of 10 because they are just completely unattainable in my mind. Like a ming vase or a red panda, Nice to look at but will I fuck ever get to touch one
Fuck off
Reminder that the poll could was skewed by the fact it took place over abank holiday weekend.
>>60163528
>>60163520
And also, is it the same for women? Women seem a lot more stuck up, pretentious and entitled when it comes to sex and never want to settle for anything other than the best, whereas men will fuck anything.
I think it might be a natural thing for men to want to have sex with most women to reproduce, whereas women don't feel this natural urge.
Lads my /brit/ threads can't update themselves anymore. What's the problem?
>>60163386
It says you licensed it, always check the small print.
>>60163367
Why dont you like someone who represents you?
>>60163537
Would frame anybody I didn't like for murder 2bh
>get home from work
>make dinner
>hop on the 'chon
>can't get into it
>nothing to do
>will need to go to bed in like 2 hours to be ready for work tomorrow
not sure I can be arsed carrying on living
btw, girls value confidence more than looks lads.
you're fucked if you have neither though.
>>60163506
thanks for the cheering up lad
i'm sure you'll get a gf one day too :)
-- UNRELATED - DON'T WANT TO WAIT 60s --
>believe me ife sheen it theres loadsh uf monee out dere, it's jusht not pashed around
>>60163604
Nothing wrong with being gay to be honest.
>>60163652
>>60163637
>>60163639
>>60163652
>>60163669
what time do you start work?
Ameridumbs
>>60163652
happens in like a million animal species. the males just shag everything to spread their genes and the females want to choose the specimen with the best traits.
back from the gym
having a mini melon and some sausage rolls all to myself
>>60163627
Unless you're super ugly then you just need to be confident. I know this is seen as some sort of meme, but honestly, I know some average as fuck lads that have shagged some beautiful girls because they just don't give a fuck about rejection and they're confident in themselves.
I know a guy with a face like a slapped arse, about 5'7 and has the body of a girl but shags good looking women regularly.
Business idea: Comedy show about an autistic and socially awkward NEET turned private detective fumbling his way through crime
>>60163669
>tfw worked like crazy for uni exams
>literally spent the last 5 days doing nothing but browse the chon, masturbate and send of job applications
good thing I'm enjoying the power and beauty of my youth really
>>60163705
09:00 most days but occasionally 08:00 or 10:00. Need to get up at 06:05 for the 9 o'clock starts.
>Can you actually get a job as a private detective IRL? Sounds like a proper bants job.
>>60163673
You can't have confidence without looks
They're directly linked
>>60163669
I'll give you a Brazzers login if you want
Worked too hard today and got sent home 5 hours early without being paid for the missing hours.
Won't be doing that again.
>>60163673
nah looks above all la
>>60163669
I have to wake up at 4:30am for work and sometimes don't go to bed until 12 and still feel fine.
Doing a maths degree at Cambridge.
>>60163757
I would like to audition for the role of anon's dad (I'm 41)
>>60163681
think on
>>60163664
i don't want to watch a show about people like me they're really ugly and boring
/r/unitedkingdom > /brit/ 2bh lads
>we live in an age where supporting an undemocratic oligarchy is considered left-wing
WHAT HAPPENED?
>what about the indian engineer or the doctor from new zealand? Where's THEIR opportunity in the british labour market.
>>60163652
this is widely observed in nature, basically it boils down to energy efficiency like everything else in nature.
the energy requirements for producing sperm are relatively low, whereas for a woman to produce a child thats 9 months, risk and dedication. So naturally they want the most bang for their buck so to speak.
Doing a read of the top posts on /r/unitedkingdom x
currently thinking on
>>60163798
>worked too hard
>got sent home
LOL what a fanny.
Why did they send you home?
>>60163769
Yes, it's very common.
You'll most likely end up getting jobs from old people trying to see what their kids are up to though.
>>60163812
I would like to the part of your errant older brother who always has girls and money but no job (I'm 44)
>>60163837
the soviet union
>>60163811
Absolute madman.
Remember lads don't wank to porn and limit your masturbation to twice a week. If you don't, if you finally get with a woman you won't be able to get it up because you'll be used to the quick and easy fix of video porn.
>>60163837
almost as if that's how all the left wing movements turn out when they take control
look at the Tyranny in France
not that the right wing is innocent, its balance and popular involvement that keeps democracy alive
>>60163914
think I prefer the porn if I'm honest
>>60163877
Because we finished an entire job site in 4 hours when it was supposed to take all day and they couldn't be bothered to send us to another site so they let the whole crew off early for the day.
>>60163914
FONT
If house prices keep increasing the way they are, and first time buyers can barely afford "starter" homes as it is, what's going to happen?
Will we just have thousands of empty houses while people live with their parents until they're 45?
>>60163914
wanking 3-4 times a week significantly reduces the risk of developing prostate cancer though.
>>60163863
Makes sense.
I don't know why they make such a big deal about rape. Just wear a condom and everything is ok...
>>60163887
jesus christ
yanks everyone
>>60163755
i've never been confident, I've shagged loads of girls (relatively) and had a few gf's but usually they approach me. When it happens the other way around its usually im off my tits or its a fluke
>>60163829
/r/uk is absolutely shocking lad. Genuinely fucking awful sub.
Me an my bf x
>>60163943
*tries to take a sip*
*cuts his lips in the metal*
ah fuck
who /consuminganalcoholicbeverage/ here?
>>60163811
>working 13 hours a day for the same job as a Warwick graduate
really hope not
>>60163914
I've stopped watching porn and I honestly feel so much better for it.
I can get hard incredibly easily. Only have to look at a girl who I'd like to shag and I'm diamonds.
Also have more energy and wanna fight every cunt.
>>60163966
FUCK YOU AUSTRALIA
I'LL KILL YOU
I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU
Ah, yes, the UK coastal border force. A tremendous power unrivaled and feared around the globe.
Our impressive fleet of 5, yes, an entire 5 boats is keeping illegal migrants from sailing across the channel.
Better think twice before you think of taking on our bastion of 5 boats
>>60164021
use a spoon or straw dummy
doo da-doo da-doo dooo doooo
*guts another aussie runt*
>>60163977
deleting reddit flags
i wont be missed
>>60163996
>>60164021
You eat it you nobhead.
4 upvotes away from 10k karma on Reddit x
>>60164082
bye
>>60164065
Yes, I do browse reddit. It's no secret.
>>60164082
Good lad
>>60164039
How do you resist the urge to wanking to porn?
>>60164082
b-but you are throwing away all your reputation in /brit/! you won't be a minor celebrity and pseudotripfag anymore!
>>60164036
>Warwick
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAH
HAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAH
HAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAH
HAHAHAHA
HAHAHAH
HAHAHA
HAHAH
HAHA
HAH
HA
http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/world/europe/Dalai-Lama-says-too-many-refugees-in-Europe/articleshow/52522387.cms
>Tibetan Spiritual leader Dalai Lama said in an interview published that Europe has accepted "too many" refugees, and that they should eventually return to help rebuild their home countries.
>"Europe, for example Germany, cannot become an Arab country," he added with a laugh, the daily reported. "Germany is Germany.
>The Dalai Lama added that "from a moral point of view too, I think that the refugees should only be admitted temporarily".
>"The goal should be that they return and help rebuild their countries"
>>60164039
*fights you*
ahh yes
>>60164090
I know you guys aren't big on teeth but eating aluminum is really unhealthy lad
