No one says 'No' to Gaston edition
are lizzie lads
>a maple leaf flag
leelee
>>58981899 Sure, but I'm going half-canadian and making poutine [s]with grated cheese instead of cheese curds[/s]
[SPARLAR] I know spoilers don't work on this board[/springer]
my internet gf keeps sending me emoticons or something but they show up as boxes
How can I fix this
Might go bed lads
>>58982009
use the system that she's sending it off
some iphone emojis don't translate out of iphone, same with certain android emojis
>>58982009
Get an iPhone.
>Gaston eats 5 dozen eggs for breakfast
that's 5,400 calories just in the morning
Cut my balls while shaving drunk
How bad will this be?
http://www.strawpoll.me/10148721
>>58982052
>>58982037
How did they not notice you were taking photos of them? Did you ever get spotted?
>>58981979
hahaha ye all good just cook em up and express ship them to me m8
>>58982074
Alright then mate.
That'll be $19.95 plus tip.
How did the KHAN'D meme actually start?
MY SIDES >>58981942 >>58981942 >>58981942
>I-it's the welsh!!!
>>58982109
nz in australia desu
http://www.strawpoll.me/10148721
IMPORTANT POLL
H
E
L
L
O
>>58982097
an australian cs team lost to a mongolian team in some tournament. some polish retard started spamming KHAN'd after the fact because apparently cs is a big deal in poland. it's pretty much the definition of a forced meme.
>>58981991
I'm sorry, but did Hillary already lose? Oh, that's right. The election isn't even over yet. In fact, it's only halftime. Does not having the lead at halftime count as a loss? Is that what you're saying? Because if you're saying that I can assure you that you're wrong. Why would you make this post when the election is still on? Hillary is still playing right now and she has been the best candidate in the United States for how many years now? She's playing one of the worst candidates in the states who just happens to have a lead because they're feeding off the energy of running in a presidential election. But you know what? He still fucking sucks. Hillary is one of the best fucking candidates in the election, they went 25-19 in the primaries and would of won all of them if reddit hadn't voted.Maybe you should shut the fuck up before you make retarded posts like this.You know why? Because you're going to be embarrassed when Hillary wins and someone bumps this post. Oh look at that, Trump just stepped out of bounds short of the last primary when he need his last delegates,just like the Bern did. Are you a fucking drunk? Are you retarded? Are you autistic? You are a fucking idiot and you should never make a post on this board again and I'm fucking serious. I almost have a feeling you're the only guy making all these anti-Hillary posts because you're a faggot hater who doesn't like woman because she's good. Fuck you, be good at something in YOUR life and then maybe try to troll these fucking teams on the board, like I give a fuck.
It's so easy to spot out your threads now, you're a retard. Always doing stupid shit like this. Why don't you try to be a good poster? Just for once? For once in your fucking life try not to make a post like this. That's just you, you're always right at getting it wrong. Fuck you. You are nothing.
>pakistan HDI
>147th
>>58982045
>>58982035
But I'm using line, surely she can only be using line emojis
>>58982141
PRINCE SADIQ
BLESSED IS HE
SADIQ KAH-HN
GENUFLECT, SHOW SOME RESPECT
DOWN ON ONE KNEE
>>58981910
Sup lads
>ask friend for headphone recommendations since he's a hardware specialist and knows this kind of shit
>basically slaps me in the face
wtf this NEVER happens to me
>>58982201
If she's on an iPhone, as far as I know, she'll be using emoji's that are compatible with iPhones, but not necessarily compatible with anything else.
Jesus I've been living off modafinil, cigarettes, coffee, red bull, and Sainsbury's meal deals for the past month. Literally ate nothing else
Stomach is in agony today, think it's all caught up
LADS how are you
>go on Facebook and see 'hope not hate' stuff everywhere
>one Muslim literally going on about how there needs to be a Muslim PM next
End it
>>58982292
>modafinil
I was under the impression that modafinil makes you think you aren't hungry but I always seem to be more hungry when I take
>>58982318
I am alri LAD
how are you
>>58982325
>>58982339
where even is this?
>>58982331
Not bad. One day at a time haha.
Tell me, is this muslim mayor of London actually a big deal in your media and whatnot or is just some dumb bullshit at the end of the day?
Eyy lads
>>58982353
Nearly everyone on /brit/ has Facebook lad
This is the most normie part of 4chan
>>58981910
>tfw you will always be a spic
>mfw you will still vote for the barrage
>>58982363
The fact that he is muslim isn't really being paraded atm, its more that he is the son of a immigrant and the Mayor of London is always a big deal in the news
Is that what you meant?
>browse /brit/ during the day
>some autist keeps spamming creepshots of interracial couples
>browse /brit/ during the night
>some autist responds to every second post with a fedora pic
Can't win lads. Need a mod dedicated to continuously banning them 2bh.
>>58982363
It's a big deal in that it's being shown to be "Love over hate", "better integration of Muslims" etc.
In reality, the position doesn't hold much power and he has received death threats for supporting gay marriage etc.
His budgets on transport don't add up though, and he's said he's going to reduce stop-and-search because it's racist
>>58982402
Yeah I guess. Like I know here our media would probably trump the fuck out of it to try and make us seem as progressive as possible. I guess the mayor if london must be big news no matter what, yeah.
>>58982139
You can't come back from that one, Nigel
>>58982388
because Britain is a primitive island
Facebook is severely unpopular here among even normies, twitter and other things are much more popular, Facebook is just a formality no one seems to like anymore.
>no cheese for poutine
>spill gravy all over the stairs on the way up
>glass of water on the bottom stair, it had to be left, not enough hands
>spill gravy all over my bedroom carpet
>pour glass of water over stair stains
>now have no water to sover up
>gravy still over carpet in bedroom
>everything going wrong
Why am I so useless lads>>>
Also forgot about the loaf of bread I have inexplicably next to me.
>>58982360
Wood Green, N. London
I live near there and it doesn't surprise me that there are so many coal burners
>>58982414
>Europeans
>Americans
can't really win
wish the cold war had kicked off and both were reduced to vapor
>>58982457
Interesting
Here twitter is declining pretty quick. Instagram and snapchat booming of course. Facebook just stays the same
>>58982466
eyy parkinsons lad
I just bought: 'Sony MDR-1AS High Res Prestige Over Head Headphones - Silver' by Sony via @AmazonUK https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B00N3WWG36
>>58982503
pls don't joke. me stepdad has parkies.
>tfw balls are still bleeding from shaving
Alright lads the janny is blowing a gasket and deleting /cum/ for no reason so I'm gonna stay here for now haha sorry if that makes you uncomfortable
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ej0NBRwht-w
>>58982527
can i have your old ones mate
>>58982552
No I still need them for the decent mic 2bh
>>58982534
>deleting /cum/ for no reason
good
>>58982585
t. cuck
What are you lads all planning to do today?
Got some work to do for an exam, but it's meant to be really hot in London today so might go chill in a park by myself for a while
>>58982064
all memes aside, half the black on white couples i see in london are of blonde girls
they love to burn coal
>>58982615
Going to find inner peace
Wake up
>>58982611
>embracing American imperialism butthole first
>>58982637
I haven't gone to sleep yet
don't think I ever will
>Why yes, I am a Canadian that identifies with the UK more than any other nation and I proudly post in the /brit/ general on the international board of 4chan.org so I can interact with the fine british gentleman I feel so closely culturally connected to
>>58982615
was gonna clean my room but didnt haha
>>58982683
Fuck of frog canadian
imagine this is the first day in 5 you haven't had to wake up exceedingly early
silly pakis
Any of you lads ever seen an odd interracial couple? Saw an Indian bloke and east Asian girl the other day
>>58982683
if you love America so much why don't you just shoot yourself?
>>58982701
jokes on you I work all weekend
but always afternoons so I always sleep in
>>58982703
I was one several times
http://www.strawpoll.me/10148820
http://www.strawpoll.me/10148820 http://www.strawpoll.me/10148820
http://www.strawpoll.me/10148820 http://www.strawpoll.me/10148820 http://www.strawpoll.me/10148820
http://www.strawpoll.me/10148820 http://www.strawpoll.me/10148820
http://www.strawpoll.me/10148820
>>58982697
You complain when anglo canucks post here anyway so why don't you go suck a fat sharia cock you little memelord fuck
>>58982730
>jokes on you
>I work all weekend
>>58982615
ur mam xd
>5:30pm
>just woke up
Ate my poutine minus the cheese lads
Didn't go well.
Did a vomit.
>>58982740
I don't
There are good Canadians, and there is french canadians
>>58982745
holy fuck hahahaha what is your life
>>58982615
gonna celebrate the new paki mayor with a halal takeaway
>>58982756
I'm not a French Canadian
>>58982756
>There are good Canadians
>>58982745
good lad
Hate when a girl says how much she loves "Netflix and pizza", occasionally how much she loves dogs / cats too
Get a fucking hobby. Are you that boring that your main interests are a TV streaming service, a type of food, or another animal? Fuck
>Congratulations, you did it, you broke free
>You're just a fish, like the rest of humanity
>>58982807
>or another animal
wdhmbt
>>58982807
shut up, i bet your only hobby is complaining on the chon haha
>>58982807
that describes like 99% of girls though
Might learn French and then move to Quebec
Good idea or no
>>58982807
most girls are boring
>>58982807
She should get a real hobby like collecting memes to post on a cambodian homing pigeon message board.
made it to zurich lads. how's my flag looking?
>>58982820
>inventing your own acronyms because you want people to ask you what they stand for
>>58982852
Very good
>>58982852
I read this a made it to Zulrah.
>>58982856
I didn't invent it
it means
what did he mean by this
I guess you should've used it :''')
>>58982835
traitor
>>58982852
why do i not have a swiss flag?
>>58982835
no
Quebec is a shithole
literally Mexico North but whiter
>>58982881
Switzerland isn't a real country
haven't met a girl named monica since at least 2003
it's a shame because i like that name
>>58982881
cus you're shit
>>58982881
your proxy isn't working
>>58982884
Are you memeing or nah, I heard it was the most successful part of Canada
Why is it bad?
>>58982881
u on your phone?
>>58982881
Cause you're not Swiss
>>58982870
What do you think of the new range weapon la?
>>58982807
nothing is worse than someone who lists "watching movies" as a hobby
it's literally the most wasteman hobby aside from like listing vaping or smoking weed as a hobby
>>58982924
are video games a better hobby?
>>58982904
because its horribly corrupt and there is zero work
also the infrastructure is awful everywhere and there is a lot of organized crime
its very white but that's it.
>>58982835
>Good idea or no
I don't see why not.
>>58982922
Haven't played in a few months, runecrafting made me want to kill myself. Have heard good things of MM2 from leddit though.
http://services.runescape.com/m=hiscore_oldschool/hiscorepersonal.ws
>>58982900
Cute post. I bet you think the holocaust happened.
there's nothing worse than getting no replies for your post
>>58982936
the thing is, nobody really treats video games as an acceptable hobby outside of neckbeards. i've met a lot more people who openly say they're favourite hobby is "watching movies" than playing videogames
>>58982956
Ah okay, i don't play anymore but i was watching some lads pk with it earlier today and it looked bretty fun.
It almost made me want to become a member again but then I remembered that every time I do that I end up playing it for a day then not logging on for the rest of the month ahaha
It's just not as fun as when I was like 10 years old.
>>58982988
No one cares
Only neckbeards think other people care
Playing videogames
>A literal Muslim mayor
Had two nightmares last night I remember really clearly, both of them woke me up
First one: Was in a lecture being given by some life guru, this autistic guy at the front keeps asking questions like 'why does everyone hate me?'. I'm sat at the back and growing suspicious, then suddenly I get a glimpse of a gun tucked into his jeans. I don't know whether to tackle him or what, but I run out, then as I was running I heard gunshots. Woke up
Second one: Look out the window and see a building in the distance on fire (almost exactly like 9/11), but suddenly it starts spreading across the city quickly, then comes to my building as I'm trying to escape. Hear this baby screaming but I keep going
Realised that both dreams I had the chance to save lives / make a difference, but I didn't to save my own. What does this mean
>>58981910
>tfw you will never have a Brit gf
Hobby implies something creative/constructive
>>58983014
film ""hobbyist"" detected
>>58982807
Most women are boring as fuck m80. Have you ever seen a woman take the lead on a date or something and come up with an interesting day out?
>>58983039
It's easy for a yank to come here and get a British girlfriend
Just as it's easy for brits to come to America and get a yank one
Exotic accents and that
>Khan wins with 44% of the vote
>Less than half of voters want him to be Mayor
Ah yes this must be the so called """"""democracy""""" i've heard so much about.
>>58983051
I am a video gamer :)
>>58983075
I don't think it's as easy as people make out desu, if you're an ugly sperg the accent won't really help.
>>58983010
I had reached a point where every stat was becoming a major grind. It's not worth all the time it takes IMO.
The game was fucking majestic playing it the first time as a kid and rune armour was a major goal.
>>58983075
Yea, but there's this Brit I know, she's just going back and forth so I'm done with Britfucks
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>>58983049
no it doesn't
>>58981955
hmmm
*jumps off the balcony*
>Buying a wedding present off someone's gift list
>Literally a bunch of tat that no one needs
>>58983034
ahahahahaha sucked in
I haven't had a nightmare in yonks :^)
It probably doesn't mean anything though, from a scientific point of view dreams are merely electrical brain impulses that pull random thoughts and imagery from our memories.
Democracy was a mistake, we should return to tribalism and/or feudalism
>>58983121
>toast rack
why would someone eat toast after its been sitting out for god knows how long rather than fresh?
>>58983121
>Getting people to buy useless shit no one in its right mind would waste any money on.
Isn't that precisely the point?
>>58983034
>tfw unironically have nightmares almost every night
:^)
>>58983144
The same person who would pay £44 for a bowl?
>>58983141
t. Jamal
I TOLD YOU MAN
>>58983121
>a cake stand
wtf is all this stupid wank?
who even eats cake regularly enough to even get use out of a cake stand? let alone want to leave cake out standing rather than in the fridge
This is what the middle class spend all their money on
>>58983121
imagine being the guy
like part of your planning has to be picking out what other people will buy you. i couldn't imagine a more boring period of time
might go to bed
>>58983141
>implying we aren't currently enjoying serfdom at the hands of Brussels
>>58983193
alri grandpa
>>58983153
That's an original Sophie Conran bowl. Do you have ANY taste you mere commoner?
>>58983188
weddings seem like such shit in general
never met a guy excited for his wedding or who wasn't pressured into it.
>>58983182
Why is everything so fucking expensive, who demands people spend this kind of money on them.
>>58983217
they will keep it in their equally expensive china cabinet to never be touched or used forever
>>58983212
Is it better than any other bowl? Does it have more ability in the field of being a bowl?
>>58983217
It's all """""designer"""""
http://www.strawpoll.me/10148721
IMPORTANT POLL
___________L
___________E
___________ANSWER
___________S
___________E
>>58983217
m8 it's now common for people to have weddings overseas, and expect your guests to foot their own expenses to fly over, stay in the country and attend the wedding. I know a girl who got married in some random fucking country and the cost of guests flying and attending and everything was like $3000. that's on top of buying them a gift.
utter narcissism.
>>58983238
Yes and yes.
You just wouldn't understand.
>>58983182
£136 on boxes, is this a joke?
>>58983251
I'm never falling for the marriage meme.
It's actually my mums wedding but I didn't want to mention it to get memed on.
So the worse thing is she's probably expecting me to spend about £500 on this tat.
>>58983276
>Knives
>Age restricted item
kek
>>58983276
>hose block with knives
>age restricted item
>>58983276
>age restricted item
how many fucking 13 year olds are going to be purchasing wedding gifts?
>>58983276
>having a broken family
>>58983276
>age restricted item
Lad you're gonna bring the yanks in now
>>58983276
>£36 for spoons
At least you get 2!
>>58981910
I want to marry a nice Brit grill ;___;
>>58983276
LOOOOOOOOL
going to have a shower lads
watch my glass of milk for me pls
being a "designer" seems to be the most wank """""job""""" ever
>>58983292
>not having a broken family and still ending up on the 'chon
pretty sure that's worse haha
>designer cutlery
This is a meme isn't it? I'm from an upper-middle class family and we had designer furniture and shit, but never designer cutlery haha
>>58983282
>>58983290
>>58983291
>>58983310
You're even worse than us when it comes to this shit.
I've got weapons in my house that require written permission from the governor to own in Australia.
who /authoritarian/ here
>>58983315
sure mate
*shits in it and swirls it around*
heh hope that kid likes chocolate milk 8)
>>58983333
>being so ashamed of 4chan you can't even type it
gb2reddit
>>58983315
*spikes milk with banterdust*
>>58983335
I seriously don't get most """designer""" stuff.
Clothing fair enough because it has a unique style and will be put together well.
But a spoon is a spoon whoever designed it
>>58983339
i dont see how we can be worse if we can buy knives with ease lol
>>58983323
I work for a huge company in the campaigns department and basically we just say what we want then pay an external company to design shit for us.
They make a fucking fortune, they charge us like £95 an hour for their design work plus loads of extra fees like £200 project management.
It's no wonder they have huge fancy offices.
>I've got weapons in my house that require written permission from the governor to own in Australia.
>>58983339
>You're even worse than us when it comes to this shit.
well clearly not seeing as knives are easily purchaseable
>>58983348
>not being a seasoned enough vet. of the 'chon to type it as 'the chon
my 8th tour around these parts in the me 'chon delta
>>58983386
thats simply not true if you want i can go down to coles right now and take a photo of the plastic cutlery section
>Go to work all week so I can relax on the weekend
>Neighbours are having some sort of work done and there's a huge machine scraping dirt around in their front garden which sounds like a plane is landing outside my house
>The guy doing it is also loud and annoying as fuck
Ahh yes, very impressive.
>>58983411
>Owning a laser pointer requires governor approval
>Koko the Gorilla has a higher IQ than most African countries - so when you call a black person a monkey, you may actually be complimenting them more than they deserve
Wow.
The more you know.
>see my fucking katana? yeah, you need written permission from the governor in your backward land to even wield such a fine craftly piece of steel
>the written permission I involve myself in is my permission for my threats to die
>>58983411
still doesn't say that knives are age restricted
>>58983459
You need written permission to own shit in your cuck country I can easily order online.
>>58983276
>my mums wedding
NEW MEME GENERATED
>>58983411
idk about victoria but slingshots are sold over the counter here, as are tubing to make them strong enough to kill shit.
as for those categories, only the middle is of any concern as half of the right category fits into the left and the left category is easily justifiable bar perhaps a massive hunting knife on your belt in the cbd.
>>58983478
yeah maybe so mate but at the end of the day you still cant buy your mum knives lmao
Oh yeah, I existed yesterday!
I wasn't really planning a trip this weekend, but some DMT arrived and it put me in such a good mood - decided to just go for it. I'm rather glad I did as it gave me one of the best experiences I've ever had. :sunny:
My body allowed my brain to exist in the 6th dimension for a while, splitting the wavelengths of reality into their real colours and letting me see the many shapes that the gas we all are could take. This, "everything is gas" motif stuck with me for the whole trip.
I spun out intricate manipulations on my partner throughout the night over what felt to be countless lives, countless branches, countless futures, countless possibilities!
A safe limitation appears I cannot see past the time boundary of the trip.
As I was really enjoying the trip, I got a bit horny. I was already outside of my normal dimensions when my partner started touching me, it felt as though I could feel every orgasm from every timeline where she finished me and I chose the one I liked the best and got it.
Last trip, it almost felt like I changed bodies. This trip, it felt like I changed universes. After the perfect "moment" with one of my cats (one that has been a bit anti-social since the death of her brother), one idea was that I found the "real" her in an alternate universe and brought her back with me, amazing shift in her affection. Like flicking a light switch.
I was sent both into the depths of madness and up into the 6th dimension, with mastery of the 5th.
On rebuild, I re-experienced my entire life up to this point, as well as all the possible branches that could have been. I think I remember my birth. Seeming light beforehand, although that could have just been my eyes being used for the first time.
>Needing an excuse to own a penknife
>Cuckstralia
>"""""belfast international airport"""""
>it's 13 miles outside Belfast
you cannot make this shit up
Alright lads I'm getting married soon, only her son is a total fucking autist
Was eating some soup in the kitchen and this little retard comes up to me and starts going on about my spoon
>Go to kitchen to get a beer
>House mate is in there
>Have to pretend I'm not in the kitchen to get a beer at 9am
Why are knuckle dusters so illegal
>>58983522
that's the point though. there's so many excuses it makes it almost redundant.
even if we were allowed it all, carrying for self defense is utter stupidity because self-defense laws are so backward that you'd be more likely to face charges yourself than your attacker.
>arguing over who is more cucked
splitting hairs. we're all fucked and we're all defenceless, except the yanks, who still have some dignity.
>>58983522
ah yes thank you poms have your laxed knife laws!
Really want a stoner / hippie girlfriend to take psychedelics with and fuck
Could not imagine a more perfect summer
ah yes, dangerous weapons.
Post heritage
>>58983588
this never would have happened in australia as he would have had to have gone through at least 5 channels of bureaucracy before even getting the 'application of eligibility for a type 3 blade yielding permit' (AET3BYP) and in that time the cops would have sussed him out to be a terrorist
>>58983414
Ahh yes, the residential work-site gimmick. One of my favourites.
I lived next to a construction site for over a year thanks to chinks, I guess that's better than living next door to a nursing home where dead grandpas get collected every week haha
>>58983604
Do you say 'wheel' or 'hwheel'?
just had a 30 minute long wank and the orgasm wasn't even good
Why do people get so worked up on 4chan about CHILDREN not being able to buy knives?
IN theory everyone here is over 18 so who cares what CHILDREN can and can't do?
Plus children have no legitimate reason to buy a knife, if they need a knife for a task they can ask their parents to borrow one.
Also with America's massive health and safety and suing culture a highly doubt children can purchase knives, even if it's not against the law it would be store policy.
>>58983691
m8 we r just meming relaks
>>58983654
Take zinc supplements
I saw online if you took zinc and did no fap you would get mad test gains. Did it, but was getting incredibly horny. Had a wank after one week and fuck me, my cum literally went everywhere, about 5 streams one after the other. Best wank ever
>>58983597
REALLY need a new age gf with delusional beliefs
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2MMadGIbMJs
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MFEfrF-rax4
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jrInfBLu7Og
>>58983691
lad why do you POST like this? is to to try and place EMPHASIS on WORDS? GENUINELY interested so reply back to ME if you get a CHANCE.
why are some twats obsessed with spoiling game of thrones for other people? i just can't comprehend it lads
Why are these bowls so cheap compared to the others?
They must have holes in them or something, nice try John Lewis
https://www.fb.com/classicalartmemes/?fref=photo
none of these are remotely funny
>>58983722
Holy fuck where do I find someone like this?
I think it'd be really difficult to connect and talk to them though if you didn't buy all that shit
>>58983775
counterfeit bowls made by the evil Chinese.
>>58983751
to provoke a reaction like yours i assume
>>58983722
have you ever even met someone like this?
this shit gets so exhuasting after a bit. you want to just tell them to knock it off.
>when 2016 finally arrives with a Muslim mayor
>>58983775
>that guy who spent £3.59 on the wedding gift
haha do it lad
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O5RdMvgk8b0
>>58983716
How many mg of zinc did you take mate?
>>58983823
How come young guys from muslim families still believe in all the religious shite? Guys from Christian families think religion is a load of old bollocks.
Is it because their families disown them if they don't play ball.
what should i do today lads?
Going to NZ in like 7 hours. That is fucking mental.
Who knew a poor boy from England would end up masturbating in New Zealand?
Highlight of Indonesia was probably meeting some chick that grew up, unironically, on an ashram (Buddhist/Hindu, I'm not sure, communal living society) in Canada and the Bahamas who literally believed that through meditation some yogis could be in two places at once. She was super nice, but believed a lot of bat shit crazy hippie junk.
Also I can't believe my mum picked the 7th to open her fucking gift list.
You know a week after pay day, when everyone has paid their bills and now has fuck all money.
>>58983855
Can't remember desu, you'd do best to research online
30mg rings a bell
>>58983879
most of them don't
>>58983775
>>58983826
>>58983860
do it lad buy the bowl hahahahaha
>son gives mum £3.50 bowl for her wedding
hahahahahahaha
Hey /broot/, how's it going?
I heard London's mayor is a paki muslim.
Is he just a decent guy with some "benefits" that could make him weird to the public eye or a full-blown jihadi extremist "just explode my shit up" kind of guy?
>>58983895
did you ask who she voted for
>>58983548
what the fuck is wrong with you?
>>58983895
how's yer travels lad
>>58983909
what the fuck is that mess
>>58983938
What?
>>58983909
fuck off paki
>>58983887
eat my shorts
Weddings are a pointless exchange of money for no reason.
I went to one once where the bride and groom paid £300 for every single guest there.
This is on the hopes that those guests would buy them gifts to equal their investment.
Why not just buy the gifts?
>>58983722
>4 weeks since I've been back from Peru in the jungle doing my shamanic initiation
Wut?
POST HERITAGE
Daily reminder that Sadiq Khan called moderate Muslims "traitors"
>>58983964
english as shortbread
>>58983950
No need for rasism bro they're from North Pakistan wich is Aryan.
BUY THE BOWL
U
Y
T
H
E
B
O
W
L
>>58982615
BEER
So I'm going to have to buy the two most expensive items on the list to show my "love". But this is just fucking tat.
I was hoping there would be a £500 settee on the list or something.
I'd rather spend £500 on something that is actually useful than £230 on useless shit.
not good
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vYgRk-IHD_c
>Weddings are a pointless exchange of money for no reason.
>>58983953
When/ if I ever get married I'm inviting my parents, siblings and my best mate and that's it and I'm going to the south of France to some rural village.
Fuck paying for a load of people I'll never otherwise talk to again.
>>58983998
>>58983995
>>58983985
>>58983984
>>58983978
>>58983964
>>58983956
>>58983953
>>58983952
>>58983950
>>58983941
>>58983938
>>58983928
>>58983924
>>58983923
>>58983917
>>58983910
>>58983909
>>58983902
>>58983901
>>58983900
>>58983895
>>58983887
>>58983879
>>58983860
>>58983855
>>58983828
>>58983826
>>58983823
>>58983811
>>58983802
>>58983798
>>58983795
>>58983782
>>58983775
>>58983751
>>58983735
alri lads i'm back i was just banned a few days
>>58983923
She's Canadian so I'd guess the current guy.
>>58983928
Breddy gud so far, Jordan, Aus and Indonesia in about 2.75 years. Going to NZ for a year, then who knows...
>>58983978
Going to need some proof
>>58984017
what couple needs a 12 & 16 pieces set
>>58984017
NO DONT YOU FUCKING DARE DO IT
TALK TO HER AND ASK IF SHE REALLY WANTS IT
want to learn how to use my numpad
feel like its wasted potential
>>58983917
full-blown jihadi extremist "just explode my shit up" kind of guy.
>>58984037
why were you banned?
>>58984017
GET THE BOWL
>son spends £3 on a bowl for his mum's wedding
>it's only used when the NEET son wants to watch daytime telly eating Frosties whilst his mum cries
>live near this strange occult / magick shop
>look in occasionally to see who's working there
>always obese women in mid 50s
>tfw no cutie young occult gf
>>58984018
Jesus, what happened to him?
>>58984056
Isn't it supposed to be a surprise?
Khan'd?
>>58984041
literally how did you know my name
>>58984017
get the bowl you melt
>>58984041
How have you been able to afford that lad? How old are you?
>>58984068
shitpost i made on /ck/
Weeping for London rn
Genuinely shocking outcome
>>58984084
I've just landed a £28k job so she's going to expect me to actually try
>>58984090
heart attack
>>58983917
He's a moderate Muslim, got death threats from muslims for supporting gay marriage
>>58983917
He's recently come back from fighting the Assad regime and bankrolled the 7/7 bombings but he insists he's left that behind so I trust him
>>58984018
how sad
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q0qD2K2RWkc&feature=youtu.be&t=75
howling
>>58983267
Ironically they found a correlation between cheap weddings and better marriages. The people spending loads on weddings are doing so becaue their relationship is shit and they need something to spice it up.
>>58983985
>calling you what you are is racism
>>58984136
>moderate Muslim
Bit of an oxymoron
>the head of the biggest city in England is a Muslim
Kek. Guaranteed a Muslim prime minister next
moderate muslims cannot exist
you either believe in jihad or you are not muslim
>>58984136
ah yes, a moderate who wants to share a platform with these people
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-middle-east-36234542
very impressive
>>58984112
Working whilst travelling.
28 years old
>>58984107
Your name is Jordan? Let me guess, you mum got remarried to a Lebanese guy and your sister is called Tiandra or something stupid, right? Fucking Jordan....lol
>>58984198
t. radical muslim
did you lads hear that race was invented int the 15th century to divide ppl? read a fricken book!!!!!!!!
>>58984148
don't understand this gimmick, different races and cultures like different stuff... we're not all the same.
Ok I've picked some stuff that is actually useful (Even though you can get an iron at Tesco for £5)
And some items that she'll display in her house so she'll remember I bought them.
>>58984213
Fair enough. Went to Indonesia in 2014, beautiful country
>>58984213
>Your name is Jordan? Let me guess, you mum got remarried to a Lebanese guy and your sister is called Tiandra or something stupid, right? Fucking Jordan....lol
no
but yeah name is jordan - bad name desu
>>58984185
Who /leaving/ here?
>>58984222
what?
>Black, Irish or white edition
>>58984249
Is your last name Fedele?
>>58984237
why the fuck do you have to get your mother a present?
>>58984237
i swear to god if you dont throw that fucking bowl in the order i'll deck you
>>58984237
GET THE FUCKING BOWL
(Also with stuff like the iron just see if you can get it cheaper elsewhere, though you run the risk of someone else buying it as well)
>raise son with all my heart
>give him shelter, hot meals every day, pay for all his clothes growing up
>times have been hard with my divorce but I've found someone who truly loves me
>son is overjoyed for me
>son lands a well-paying job and things look up for him
>son says to me "mum, I want you to have this"
>it's a present in his hand, no doubt a photo album of all the times we've shown solidarity and fortitude together
>open it
>a fucking toast rack
>mfw
>>58984148
>tfw no afro cutie like 1:42
>>>/mu/64651477
right, which one of you is this?
>>58984266
What?
>blacks like fried chicken
>irish like potatoes
>whites like slavery
>>58984024
I mean she might want some guests too
>>58984290
P E D O
>>58984238
Nice, where about?
right, connected to wifi at my mate's house. how's my flag looking now?
>>58984290
how have you done with women on your travels?
where have you been treated like a godking for being white?
>>58984280
Thats not how gift lists work. The shop delivers the items straight to the wedding.
>Wedding gift lists
>I'm getting married and have the audacity to ask you to help me furnish my house
>>58984320
positive
>>58984313
>he's gonna ask a woman's opinion on a wedding
Theyre not really into weddings and shit, more of a mans thing
>>58984349
kek good lad
>>58984317
FOY
>>58984328
Hold up, people actually hand out lists of items they'd like?
>>58984284
>"I-i love it son" I tell him meekly, tears welling up in my eyes
>the shame I feel in this moment is like nothing I've felt before, my son is a pathetic loser
>suddenly his face turns to a wide grin
>"aaaaah I got you!" He laughs "you think I just got you a toast rack? I'm your son!"
>he pulls out another box from behind his back
>it's fairly heavy and beautifully wrapped
>open it
>a fucking bowl
>before I can say anything he grabs it and starts pouring Frosties in
>>58984017
also buy the bowl
>>58984349
now remove the 4 other items
>>58984057
its pretty good, lad
dont use mine anymore since i use a 10 keyless she-beast but back when i played wow and back before i was good at it, i use to use it instead of a mouse
also you can pick up how to type numbers in fast in about 10 minutes lmfao :D
>>58984372
m8 it's been the common practice for the last decade. they email you a link of all the shit they want and you choose what to buy them
Londonistan
>>58984319
Flew into Jakarta, travelled through Java, hopped on the plane to Bali, started in Kuta then travelled up to Ubud (stayed in a home stay which was incredible), went to some other places k can't remember the name of, went to the gili isles, back to Kuta then back home
>>58984423
what does foy mean? did you mistype "joy"? lmfao :D
What message should I tell John Lewis to put on the gifts lads?
*puts toast in the toast rack*
I'm going to grab some jam, don't touch my toast
>>58984450
"here ya go slut"
>>58984417
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tt6Md-jMVHk
>>58984319
Not him but i've also been, did a few days in kuala lumpur then went on to bali for the rest of the holiday
>>58984450
hope you like the bowl x
>>58984450
">A FUCKING TOAST RACK"
*makes toast*
*puts toast in toast rack*
hold up gotta go to the toilet
*activates anti-theft technology on toast rack*
Ah yes this is very useful.
(I'm noticing there are zero gifts on this list for the guy, he collects WW2 memorabilia)
>>58984450
"You can use the bowl for cereal, or your keys!"
Met a cute girl on POF.
Asked for her number but she said she wants to meet me first.
Guess who's got a date for next week?
>>58984513
>>58984478
>>58984469
hope these presents BOWL you over haha xx
>>58984501
Sounds like a right melt
>>58984501
do not fucking buy a spiralizer
this meme needs to die
>>58984518
her
>>58984526
He's basically Mark from Peep Show.
>>58984469
>>58984513
either of these
>>58984450
>>58984551
Kek
>>58984546
Yep. ;-;
hurry up and make a new one cunts
i am a paki
Forgive and forget Zac Goldsmith’s racist campaign? No chance
>>58984542
why? they're good for peeling apples.
>a fucking toast rack
>>58984594
who
Did people think Labour being antisemetic would actually lose them votes from their core voter base?
>>58984617
>>58984612
hahaha alri lads
who here /bowl/?
Why isn't the election being rerun because a """"mistake"""" meant that an entire area was unable to vote?
my sneezes could be classified as a sonic weapon lads wow
>>58984629
anti semetic? Yes
Anti Israhell? No
having a wank over abella anderson
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IXsKF48J89k
>>58984655
because its all a farce mate
>>58984669
not bad
>>58984658
bless your enemies
>>58984655
what
Wait, would it be better to purchase the expensive china instead of stuff I think is "useful" like the electronic appliances?
Normies don't think about utility they are purely emotional beings so my mum probably wont think "I'm glad anon bought me something that's useful".
People always display and talk about their wedding china.
>>58984699
they will not exist if i keep this up
>>58984705
what
>>58984705
if your mum honestly thinks that after you drop £220 on her wedding then you can tell her to squat on it
>mfw studying while listening to the entire 9 hour lord of the rings soundtrack
>>58984701
Loads of people in Barnet were left off the register list so were turned away.
Barnet is heavily Jewish and Conservative.
>>58984670
wtf
all my mates have large credit card debts or have 0 savings.
how do people exist like that? i always try to have at least 5k floating about just in case.
>>58984212
When did Sadiq Khan join ISIS?
>>58984705
things that are genuinely useful and don't end up collecting dust in the cupboard are always good gifts in the long run. Since they'll end up using it a lot and appreciating it for longer than something purely ornamental.
>>58984705
Right you're doing my fucking head in now
You're her SON. Get her something which she will remember fondly, like a photo album, something memorable from her childhood, I don't know, just anything except the shit on that amazon wish list (which she wants other people to buy)
You think she'll be happier with a £200 toast rack and other shit, rather than something that actually means something?
>>58984655
Because it wouldn't make any difference
Barnet is not going to change the election
>>58984781
whoa whoa whoa are you saying she wouldn't remember a 3 quid bowl?
>>58984795
yes
>>58984795
If the only thing my son bought me on my wedding was a £3 bowl I'd remember it forever.
Got 2 joints to smoke tonight
>>58984811
WAIT
what if the bowl is from her childhood??
get the bowl m8 it's a bowl she had in her youth. she remembers the good old days with one just like it
>>58984782
ah yes, lets just ignore how thousands of people were denied their democratic right just because it wouldn't make a difference. very impressive.
Getting a £3 bowl is actually the best option. She will be angry at first but it will quickly turn into a funny story she'll remember and tell forever.
She wont remember anyone buying her a £200 toast rack.
>>58984821
>>58984841
Going to smoke all of them hahah
>>58984841
>>58984738
quality posts once again
>buy £3 bowl
>leave a note inside saying "this bowl may break, but I will always love you"
Cheap and sentimental. Double win
>My mums husband
>>58984738
>studying
FOC
going to my mams wedding but it's a bit cold out tbqh
>>58984846
i keep saying it lad. you could literally filter all aussies and not miss out on anything worthwhile. they literally do not contribute anything to /int/. its a weird anomaly really. even yanks make interesting posts now and again.
>>58984861
how Oedipal
>>58984861
I got my gf a compass for 1 pound off amazon then wrote 'because I'd be lost without you' on the inside. It made her cry lmao all I did was spend a quid
>>58984864
Me mum is dating a Turk
>>58984884
>>58984882
typically kafkaesque with a touch of joyce
lel
http://newsthump.com/2016/05/07/sadiq-khan-welcomes-isis-into-his-new-london-caliphate/
G'day how you doin
>Weekend comes around
>Time for my weekly visit to look around the garden centre and not buy anything
Who lifeonreapeat here?
>>58984831
That's a sad story, but it doesn't actually matter
>>58984902
yeah but is he a nice guy? had a mate in high school who was a turk. shittest muslim ever if they were ever serving pork at the dining hall he'd devour it and just be like "nah fuck i love pork man".
pretty sure he's pushing pills heavy nowadays haha what a guy
Lords of the rings was the only film I've ever walked out of in the cinema. So shit
>>58984950
ok rasheed.
>>58984953
No he beats her
>>58984948
what is this garden centre, is it important to brits