cold out
Merry Christmas lads
christmas karen
she's a whore
I've got two presents. Frying pan and a book
>>52629731
>>52629733
i want you both to know that the only reason you beat me to the first post was because i had to wait for the post cooldown
right lads time to get up and open all the cheap sweets my mum bought me and then reretire to my room to wrap her present
Got a hairband for Christmas, can finally look like Ritsu.
>>52629745
what's the book
its not about what presents you get, but about spending quality time with the character you love.
merry christmas lads
If God is everywhere, why do I need to drag my arse over to his house this morning to grt my religion points?
>>52629750
>wrapping on the day
you fucked up. Why not wrap it before you open yours? Christ.
Lynix Africa set ... Great.
>>52629745
Its ok anon
>>52629759
ur nan book
>>52625753
>>52625778
>>52625801
Who is this?
>>52629765
>Why not wrap it before you open yours?
actually a good idea desu
yes, i will do this
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MqBF7TiyATo
Check da moon
Check da mooon
>Come now sing with meee, propa crimboooo (selecta)
Gonna dress up as a fucking Christmas ornament and hang myself lads haha
>>52629773
probably some ''''''''''''youtuber'''''''''''' i.e. an narcissistic cretin.
>>52629738
Fosters gold la
only got 5 presents this year, fucking fuming i had a fit of rage downstairs and started shouting at them all. they weren't even good presents, last year i got like 20 wtf are they doing.
going for a walk in the fields
>>52629815
Go to bed, Dudley.
>>52629840
Pissing down
Merry Christmas lads. x
>>52629840
don't kill yourself lad
>>52629814
wew, bad lad.
>>52629854
>that room
c-craven?
>>52629857
Not gonna kill myself before dinner desu
>>52629854
Craven confirmed.
got a wank and a potnoodle for christmas
>got a Minions onesie for Christmas
....
>>52629854
Where are you?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rg66j0fUbUk
>>52629878
>>52629880
>le aristocrats are rich meme
>>52629887
I had a pot noodle too
No sinning though, dont want my gift to be a one way ticket to hell
>>52629799
Link to her pls
i don't do chrstmas lads
>>52629854
>parents are dead
>all dem presents
Craven is over-compensating
>>52629901
It's literally a estate home.
>>52629896
truly ''''''''halerous'''''''
>wake up
>go to check my presents
>barely fucking anything there for me
>nah not dealing with this
>make the point to count out the presents to humiliate them
>only 37 presents
>had 38 last year
>made mummy buy me two more presents so i got 39 this year
fucking hell lads
Merry Christmas lads, have a good one.
>>52629854
Never been in a house that has two radiators in one room
I can't even stand up fully straight in my bedroom
>>52629926
Rasheed/Rosenberg
>>52629950
stay away from children please!
>>52629950
fuck off
>>52629945
t. Dudley Dursley
I don't care about the presents
I just want my oneitis to like me again ;_;
Just had a festive wank. Time to open pressies soon. Merry Christmas cunts.
>>52629950
Have a very merry Christmas lad, you not home for it?
Update on my working class christmas
My parents did get me something after all, a book.
They think I'm a nerd because I went to uni (just your average student) and I love history and I love politics etc.
They bought me a book about science made by that XKCD because it says 'le nerd royalty, nerdds will love this book' on the front
should I just fucking hang myself?
merry chebmas
>>52629969
cucked by your loins la
>>52629969
she's getting a christmas rogering right now as we speak lad
>>52629960
right guess
tell a lie did sneak out last night and got fucking mullered at my m8s and then the pub like with my boys, saw the girl i never quite got over and saw her go off with some lad, snuck back in again and stuffed my face on samosas
sitting here waiting for me mum to make me masala tea 2bh.
Didn't buy my parents anything. Scared to get out of bed lol
>>52629970
had a proper good splooge last night
feeling quite merry at the time
>>52629981
you fucking nerd
>>52629878
>>52629880
>>52629895
>>52629929
Not Craven sorry lads.
>>52629981
>They bought me a book about science made by that XKCD because it says 'le nerd royalty, nerdds will love this book' on the front
lmao
>>52629982
>aussies consider this normal Christmas attire
Need to move to the southern hemisphere desu
>>52629988
Fuck off Kevin Patel.
>>52629984
She's a lesbian and a virgin.
>>52629983
Hm?
>>52630001
fuck off quadrillionare
>>52629981
Cheers lad you too, not staying just wanted to wish you lads all the best, going for a visit next summer.
Enjoy the book! Might be good haha
doing a festive christmas poo lads. it's a monster t b h
>go downstairs
>eye-ball the present stack and it's pretty clear i've been shafted
>ask for an estimate of the total value of my gifts
>under £1000
>Start stomping around weeping, smashing ornaments and literally shitting myself for a good ten minutes
>come upstairs and back to bed
Love Christmas time ;^)
>>52630001
Thst is literally Craven's reception room
>>52630032
>lesbian
>virgin
>>52630001
Is this your home?
>>52630001
Looks a bit gloomy tbqh
please send cheap cider
>>52630055
All estate houses are haunted
>>52630038
T. Dudley Dursleby
>>52630044
She's super shy and timid and o CE she got drunk and said she wishes she had a qt gf to kiss and cuddle with.
But I want to kiss and cuddle her ;_;
>>52630014
did a cheeky bit of christmas charlie as well
Happy christmas lads. Wallowing in despair desu
merry christmas friends
is it too early to start drinking?
>>52630057
you want a 3 ltr Frosty Jacks?
>>52630062
new meme on christmas morning
>>52630044
All lesbians are virgins because they don't take cocks to deflower them.
family is arguing lads
>>52630103
They dildo eachother m8
>>52630111
t.lesbian expert
>>52629791
Good post
>>52630097
or buckfast
properly shit booze is tough to find outside the ghetto
>>52630111
If I put a dildo up my bum it doesn't mean I've lost my virginity.
Got so much booze lads, this is going to be a messy few days tbqhwyl
>>52629982
C H E B S
H
E
B
S
>>52629969
>tfw its been 6 years and i hate her as a person, but my heart still drops when i see her
>come downstairs mid-day
>Family arriving, drinks flowing
>get poured some champagne, taste it, it's okay
>ask what it is
>Non-vintage
>spit it over my family, boot my aunty in the gut and run upstairs
That was 2014, I trust they won't make the same mistake this year.
All I want for Christmas is a (You) pls
>>52630131
Are you snowed in?
Take a trip down to you your local microbrewery
>>52629950
MERRY KARISMASU
>>52630039
It used to be a Ballroom actually and it has a sprung floor but its only used as a sitting room now.
>>52630055
It is desu, the lights in the room are too dim and the Chandelier is only a small one. The original one was alot bigger and got moved to another home.
>>52630148
First one I've laughed at, thanks
>Tfw getting dragged to my family friends
>tfw i just wanna jam on 4chan for the day
ffs
happy christmas lads
>>52630149
Merry (You)mas
Post your breakfast booze lads
>>52630081
11am, same as any other day.
>>52630145
>tfw it's been 2 months and i hate her as a person, and don't feel anything when i see her or anything
feels good man. was really worried it would be a forever type of pain but i'm over it now
>>52630081
Well its definitely too late to stop wahey!
>>52630184
alri
>>52630197
some memers I know have champagne with breakfast on Christmas morning. A bit vulgar imo.
>>52630184
had tia maria and coffee
was grim
gonna try it with orange juice later
>>52630210
I got a rekorderlig gift set this morning. Proper chuffed with it.
>>52630152
no snow here ever
i am tired of weird flavors in my beer, also breweries can't sell out the door
>>52630211
mimosas are delightful tho
>>52630206
i tihnk it was so early in my development that it has peramently scarred me
luckily i only see her once in a blue moon down the pub
>>52630210
>Swedish """"Cider""""
Bad lad
>>52630210
>>52630229
t. slightly overweight lower-middle class slags with type 2 diabetes
>>52629981
>being this fucking ungrateful
You're an absolutely contemptible social climber. You sound horribly insecure and desperate and I bet neither your working class compatriots or your new middle class peers can bear to be around you
>>52630184
realised yesterday that i can just pull the cork out myself, no need for that shitty bottle opener that works half of the time
>>52630211
My family does that
Wish I didn't stay awake all night. I'm going to be tired all day.
Already got 2 Lynx shower gel gift sets. It's going to be a great day.
>Drinking anything other than Buck's Fizz in the morning
>>>/pakistan/
>>52630138
Women loose are deflowered when that membrane thing gets punctured and they gush out the blood.
Going to read a books lads as i wait for rest of family to arrive and the lunch to cook.
>>52630272
>tfw booked some tickets to pakistan in the new year
gonna see all my cousins and that
Lol u saddos posting on 4chan on Christmas day
>>52630250
I'm not bothered about my class desu, just a bit sad that we hit the negative side of the stereotype so hard.
I'm obviously grateful and say thanks to them etc
Just a bit sad, because my parents often forgot what degree I was studying whilst I was doing it and they were obviously out looking for me and thought, 'oh, our son, he likes reading doesn't he and he's a bit of a nerd, let's get him this whacky science book' after walking past the ubiquity of political and history books I would have actually read
>>52630286
looks cozy
>>52630236
my key was having a round 2 with her, the first time we ended it fucking ruined me for months and months, she was my first serious adult relationship and lost my virginity etc. really wasn't able to let go i evelated her to some ridiculous position in my head and thought she was the best person in the world
but having that round 2 and being with her again i realised that she is just a person, i liked her but she wasn't special. it kinda fixed me
if you ever have the chance lad, go back to her for a while it will help i swear down
>>52630286
seriously lad, you still haven't told me
Is this your house or what?
You got a comfy log burner?
>>52630290
hope the plane crashed paki twat
Mum's bought me the comfiest slippers ever from marks but they're too small
Christmas is ruined
>>52630286
>>52630286
How many poor people will you be eating do you think
>>52630286
Are you in a country hotel?
>>52630299
>cozy
Fuck off yank
>>52630305
nah that ship has sailed long ago.
i ended up egging her and her friend because they were treating me like a fool
mum got me a gf for Christmas!!!
>>52630326
>not showing good will to all men and peace on earth
calm your tits rasheed
Got some Clark desert boots lads, good cop or nah?
>>52630341
ahh damn
have you had anyone else since?
>>52630364
hope you burn too death in the wreckage punkjabi bastard
>>52630359
is it a qt one?
Will you get a gf in 2016?
>>52630365
You live in a desert or nah?
>>52630329
you know what to do
Force your feet in to them, cut the toe-cap off if necessary and gaffa tape them to your feet. Stride around all day pointing out to your family how they're too small for you, shaming your mother about how your day is completely fucked as a result.
t. Dudders
>>52630367
no not really :(
>>52630294
and yet here you are
>>52630394
not ever
>>52630286
>edwardian era
no thanks
>>52630365
I wear a black pair for occasions that don't require oxfords but are too smart for trainers 2bh.
Pretty good cop.
>>52630394
lol no
>only just got up
>mum already making passive-aggressive comments at everybody
Fuck that cunt, time to spend the day shitposting.
>>52630450
lel, like what lad?
I guess I take for granted how sound my parents are 2bh.
stupid alcoholics please go and stay go.
Fuck sake came on here for something to read while I avoid my extended family and you're all just posting dudley Dursley memes
Nobody even talking about what they got? Ffs lads come on it can't all be meme and amine related
>>52630365
Yes lad good shoes
>>52630423
>Edwardian
The House is Georgian. With extensions added in the 1960s.
>>52630237
If you call any of the pisswater the UK has the gall to call Cider even remotely drinkable then you can get fucked la. Strongbow, magners etc are all terrible.
>>52630476
parents don't get me christmas presents something about not giving credence to kuffr traditions or something lad
its alright though we get presents for eid instead
>>52630476
We're all fucking miserable, the happy ones are with their families
We need some cheer in here lads, get those christmas songs going
What's your favourite?
>>52630476
>Nobody even talking about what they got?
did that in the previous thread desu
Got a PS4 lads
>>52630509
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ET8ZemGgWfM
>>52630394
I found a new qt to try my luck with, gonna make it this year la
W E W L A D S
merry christmas xo
I'll suck your dick
taking pain pills on the plane getting chartered
>>52630476
Shouldn't have got up so late you lazy cunt, we already had the what we got thread.
>>52630476
got the same exact sweatshirt as i already had 2bh
>>52630554
Lookslikearealdoll/10
Family is trying to break the door down lads. They don't know I've moved the fridge in front of it haha
>>52630509
I'm ill and told my mum to go see family without me, didn't want to fuck up her Christmas desu
>>52630580
you madman
>>52630308
>>52630338
Helped put the tree up 2 weeks ago lads. Ballroom was evener darker then.
Alright then
>A book I wanted
>A Leatherman tool
>Shoe shining polish & brushes
>Some nice coffee beans
>Some cash
Pretty happy with it ngl
>>52630495
Yeah they are shit, but there are good brands too.
>>52630580
Take a photo
having a NP (nice poo) lads
>>52630509
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MhgN6Et9sYw
>>52630580
What
>>52630608
this is a real shitpost
>Tfw all the girls in my area hate me
Mum unironically purchased me a toilet brush and bleach for my toilet in my house
Smfh
>>52630605
Name 3 brands.
weebshits are asleep
post rare lisickis
>>52630600
>A Leatherman tool
I'd be happy with just this desu.
I lost mine a while ago but my boss gave me one he had spare, can't beat them.
What one did you get?
>>52630622
>americans need moisturising cream to wank
toplel
>>52630600
You sound proper bent desu
>tfw got nothing for Christmas
>mum and her boyfriend got each other stuff
>they're sat upstairs in bed now whilst I sit down here alone
>>52630365
/fa/ staple circa 2010 but yes, good cop
wonder if thailad hates pakis
>>52630639
Aspall
Henneys
Sandford Orchards
>>52630669
kill em lad
>>52630495
Am I the only one who goes into a pub and just asks for cider/lager/etc? What's with all this brand whoring?
>>52630645
>asleep
>>52630647
Just looked it up, Leatherman Charge Tti, seems like a good one.
Think my dad got it with air-miles. Going to have to spend some time with the instructions 2bh; not immediately obvious how to access a lot of the tools.
>>52630661
No need for that lad not today
He's happy with what he got, be happy for him
Hate when people ask me what I see myself doing in 5 years
I don't have 2020 vision
>tfw i'm still finishing breakfast and the family's already onto the fourth bottle of champagne
christmas is always a good day to be from a family of functioning alcoholics tbf
>>52630693
noose up fagtron
ayyy fuc up
>Hey barkeep, I'd like some of your finest pisswater today, don't tell me what it is though, none of that brand whoring for me
what motorbike does father christmas ride on?
>>52630707
haha lad you're a spacker but i like you
>>52630704
>spending £160 on a pocket knife
wut
>>52630693
L O N D O N
>>52630732
>air-miles
It's a good bit of kit desu, will last a life-time by the looks of it.
this thread is proper boring i might talk to my fucking famiy instead given how boring yo lot are
>>52630755
fuck sake people have got to prepare food on that surface
Got some scotch to drink lads.
>>52630605
Thatchers is the best big brand, some of Bulmers fruit ciders are quite nice too and there are loads of smaller brands that are really nice too like Henderson's and Perry's.
>>52630750
25 year warranty
You get a shit one every now and then but they will fix it for you no problem if needed
>>52630775
Twink legs
>>52630775
Enormous madman
parents gave me £100
>>52630755
Nice tits. Would bang.
>>52630809
What are you going to spend it on?
>>52630826
probably gonna only gonna buy a game on steam then keep the rest
>>52630826
going down to betfred later
>>52630775
>blended
Into the garbage it goes.
Fucking poorfag.
>>52630750
>>52630791
Noice
Shame multitools are a jack of all trades master of none though.
If you didn't know you can carry a knife of 3 inches of shorter on you with no reason required btw so you can carry it around.
just recovered from my food coma lads
>>52630809
Millionaire out
>>52630837
>garbage
Fuck off yank
what time did/will you lads start drinking today?
>>52630855
Into the rubbish?
>>blended
>Into the garbage it goes.
>Fucking poorfag.
>>52630881
rasheed
>>52630837
Sorry hans. We're not all in the Malt Whiskey master race.
>>52630867
12:01
spent a grand on a new pc lads, proper treated myself. may fuck myself later to treat myself for buying me such a good present.
>>52630755
Post the Lisicki version
>>52630867
going to family's so about 1pm when we arrive 2bh
>>52630890
>whiskey
Fuck off Yank
>>52630877
Into the bin m8
>>52630836
kek
You'll waste it m8
>>52630836
CLE vs. GSW over 209.5 is a lock
TURN ON BBC HOLY SHIT
what music do you guys listen to?
>>52630877
into the waste dispenser
>>52630894
Specs?
>>52630867
Corona wit the Christmas lunch at 12.30 ish i reckon.
Wew lass
Reminder to PLEASE stop saying "Merry Christmas" to strangers, this is out of respect to other ethnic groups who don't celebrate Christmas! :)
>>52630943
sea shanties
>>52630943
Indie, alt and garage rock
>>52630950
Corona
>>52630938
Black woman reading out stuff on Carols from King's?
>>52630938
???
>>52630967
this 2bh
>>52630968
>>52630969
Yeah, but, do you like Phil Collins? I've been a big Genesis fan ever since the release of their 1980 album, Duke. Before that, I really didn't understand any of their work. Too artsy, too intellectual. It was on Duke where Phil Collins' presence became more apparent. I think Invisible Touch was the group's undisputed masterpiece. It's an epic meditation on intangibility. At the same time, it deepens and enriches the meaning of the preceding three albums. Christy, take off your robe. Listen to the brilliant ensemble playing of Banks, Collins and Rutherford. You can practically hear every nuance of every instrument. Sabrina, remove your dress. In terms of lyrical craftsmanship, the sheer songwriting, this album hits a new peak of professionalism. Sabrina, why don't you, uh, dance a little. Take the lyrics to Land of Confusion. In this song, Phil Collins addresses the problems of abusive political authority. In Too Deep is the most moving pop song of the 1980s, about monogamy and commitment. The song is extremely uplifting. Their lyrics are as positive and affirmative as anything I've heard in rock. Christy, get down on your knees so Sabrina can see your asshole. Phil Collins' solo career seems to be more commercial and therefore more satisfying, in a narrower way. Especially songs like In the Air Tonight and Against All Odds. Sabrina, don't just stare at it, eat it. But I also think Phil Collins works best within the confines of the group, than as a solo artist, and I stress the word artist. This is Sussudio, a great, great song, a personal favorite.
So what do the brits do today now that xmas (don't want to offend anyone by saying christ) has been banned because its haram?
Do you guys sneak dinner?
Are there like secret dinner nightclubs like America during prohibition?
What happens if the patrols find you?
>>52630950
>Corona
Surely you mean the blood of a virgin?
Go grab one from your 5 story sex dungeon/ballroom
>>52630943
black metal tbqh
Thinking of paying an escort to teach me how to git gud at sex (3 inch penis).
Any tips? Don't really want to go down or kiss an escort though....
