/x/ how do I contact aliens? I live in Phoenix, have a telescope, a book on astronomy, and a few energizing crystals. How do I contact the aliens? I've got 100 dollars to spend on more stuff needed for it. And yes I've just recently become obsessed with aliens.
You've got to get in good graces with the wizards first, they've cornered the alien communication market.
Stop by the local guild hall and ask around there.
My great aunt is into witchcraft so I'll ask her for advice. Going camping next week, so I want to prepare
Spend your money on psychedelics, if you can find anyone who sells any genuine, good and clean stuff.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4q8y1dRp_4Q
>>16948434
> go to the beach
> dig toes into the sand
> face the ocean
> lean against the wind
> pretend to be weightless
> lay head onto the sand
> observe sky
> count UFOs
> signal them with lighter
And in this moment you are happy
HAPPY
>>16949017
Hey that sounds really peaceful,
I'm going to watch the meteor shower next Wednesday morning to see if any of them are hiding in there. Will do anything you post that sounds half serious
>>16948852
Already ate a quad of shrooms at once. No aliens, just geometric shapes, cog horn, and everything felt good to touch
Taking all my good chakra portals with me pic related.
Also
>>>>16949095
*fog horn
what makes you think you are worthy of alien contact to begin with?
Even if you did, what would you expect to happen?
>>16948434
go on a mountaintop away from all city lights,
aim laser at sky and ask aliens to come investigate you
thank me after you meet the aliens
>>16949103
I'm sure this sounds gay as fuck but I've always felt a strong connection with the universe. Even as a kid I new that. My Pa pa told me that when I was a baby I would stay fixed on the sky at night. I also tried a alchemical "soul portal" two years ago from "Alchemy of Takeo" which I can't find on the web or at the bookstore I bought it from
It basically said to sit outside in full moon around a symbol you draw in fig leaves, symbol was called "squaring the circle. You had to bring with you a (cant recall the amounts, were in grams) silver, lead, salt, pure water (had to get university to make me a few drops), various stones, trace amount of gold, and a triangular pyramid made of glass. Will explain
>>16949160
The last ingredient was a few drops of my blood. I droped the ingredients in a hole in the man's head (look up squaring the circle" and had to sit outside for the remainder of the night, until the sun begins to rise. I rember it described the last part as something like "..until dawn and her rose red fingers apear on the horizon". My last room mate took the book with him after he found my chest of mesoamerican human jaw remains (family from gro. Mexico), mercury, nickel, books, and small vial of blood
>>16949187
Again if absolutely anyone can find anything about the book post a reply. It was "Alchemy of Takeo" and had baroque stlye art on it. The bookstore I bought it from is like "ABC books" and moved farther away from me. I called the manager, he says he has the book sale on record, but that he buys a lot of books from yard sales and doesn't recall where he bought that one from.
>>16949120
Don't want to make pilots blind, will use triangular glass pyramid and uv light
Don't let thread die :c
>>16948434
>Become obsessed with aliums and space.
>Don't bet an /x/fag and actually become interested in astronomy and learn about it, and gain familiarity with the night sky.
>See tons of UFO's first, then slowly they disappear as you identify them as being the Pleiades open star cluster, Venus, satellites, and meteors.
>Begin to get more interested in astronomy and space science, find out that there's 0 scientific evidence for aliens and that dedicated amateur astronomers don't see shit, it's just non-skylord peasants being trolled and retarded.
>Shrug because what you're learning and observing is cool and interesting enough as it is, no need for alien myths.
>Figure out that amateur astronomy is perfect for romancing dates after you've known them for a while as you can show them awesome stuff in a dark, quiet environment. Just don't be a neckbeard and focus on aesthetics and how wonderful stuff rather than trying to seem smart with facts. You want to be sky naturalist guy, not star trek nerd.
>Now you have an awesome hobby, a job, and a girlfriend.
Good luck OP.
>>16950847
Left out that you get a job in order to afford the expensive-ass telescope you wanted.
>>16948434
1. Invent a warp drive
2. Find a planet with alien life
3. Use said warp drive
4. ???
5. You just contacted aliens without spending those 100$
And the /x/ version.
>>16948434
Radio signals. Radio signals are constantly being sent out by earth into space. Our entire history starting from the first radio broadcast, to today is out there moving through space.
Send a message that is easy to translate. Use math preferably since math is called rhe universal language because it is a universal concept that is easy to understand.
>>16948434
>shitty telescope
>shitty book
>shitty rocks
>$100
aliens don't want to talk to you.
>energizing crystals
How do you know ayylmaos will jo with you
Lie outside naked in a field with your ass facing up. What happens then is that aliens will beam you up to probe your anus. That, or you'll get raped by a hobo.
Give CE5 a try. Worst case scenario is you get into TM.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TK08c_fCySk
>>16948434
Get the most powerful laser you can find and wave it around the night sky, preferably while pulsing out the digits of pi.
>>16948434
>and a few energizing crystals
E.Ts will never talk to you. They prefer intelligent life.
>>16948434
Read Liber LXXL
kek jk bro don't try.
>>16950847
This is now my plan thanks m8. Thread can die after one more post
>>16950873
>>16950896
Saving these
>>16950988
Radio signals been going out for a while, mine would arrive very late and seem insignificant
>>16950998
>>16951022
>>16951041
>>16951873
>>16951896
Low quality bait. Stop shitposting and making dumb threads on /x/ you neckbeards
Thank you friend
>>16949017
Ayy
Go to El Paso. You'll meet a lot of aliens there, at least until Donald Trump tries to build THE WALL. Then that will magically keep all aliens out of the country until the end of time, sorry. :/
>>16950811
I never get tired of seeing this picture. I first saw it when I was thirteen, and over a decade later I'm still awestruck by it. Thousands of galaxies contained in one microscopic image of outer space, serving as final photographs of what once was.
If there was one picture I'd want to hang on my children's wall, it would be this image. I would hope they counted the galaxies and stars, imagined what kind of worlds existed in them, what kinds of people, what kinds of elements... and realized that any number of their suppositions could've been true at some point in time. Countless civilizations that we'll never find even the faintest evidence proving their existence.
Just photographs of what once was. A fate we will share someday as well.
>>16948434
Just think or say Eue and talk.
>MIB
>>16954262
It is funny you should say that about never meeting Space Aliens when we're going to be discovering what the deal is with KIC8462852...
>>16948434
GO out into a field
Yell at the sky
"I'm the fuckin shit I can take on anything"
Tell the aliens they ain't shit. Scrawny ass bug-eyed fools!! Fuck you!!
They'll be so offended oh man. They'll come down. Wanna probe your ass. Let them if you don't mind but you just contacted those freaky looking motherfuckers.
>>16954392
Also wave your dick around they like that
>>16949101
That is seriously the gayest shit I've ever seen on /x/. Until /x/ gets into Trap tulpas. We all know it's coming.
>>16954450
Tulpas are already a trap to drain their soul from their bodies...
>>16949017
I wish you were here
Get your J.O. crystals and have a sesh outside on top of a mountain with some friends. The energy radiating from the crystals will surely reach some aliens.
>>16954565
More energy is produced if you rub "magic rods" together and climax simultaneously. That'll summon at least 10 UFO's.
>>16948434
>breathe slowly and deeply
>think in a highly positive manner while meditating
>feel warmth in your plexus
>drift off
Idk, but that seems to be how most of these "enlightenment" processes work.
>>16950988
Like this?
>>16948434
>follow NASA on twitter
Get closer to your subject
Most often, I have seen them around the hours of 3-5AM
Get a high-powered green laser with which to shine into the night sky at random stars (which could be UFOS).
Project your mental thoughts out into the universe.
If all else fails, go to ECETI ranch.
Use hundred dollars - procure dmt - take dmt, astronomy books and telescope to the wilds. Read, observe the sky, and smoke dmt. Repeat as needed - ( orally consumed peganun harmala couldn't hurt... About 3 grams brewed as a tea should suffice.)
>>16955832
>200 light years in diameter
...Kepler has identified numerous stars within that range that has planets orbiting them. Several of them are Kepler Objects of Interest....stars with light curves that seem to indicate planets whose composition are rocky (or at least about as massive as Earth).
TL;DR---lots of stars and shit out there that could get our radio signal---or what's left of it
>>16954450
It's already happening. Just lurk the succubus threads for a while.
>>16948434
You put only one l in alien
>>16952070
OP wants to try contacting aliens with a $100 budget, I think this thread was plenty dumb without us
>>16948434
Alien here from the Sirius star system. What can I do for you pal?
>>16948434
Find the most remote place you can, get really really high on weed; then point your ass into the sky and pukker like you mean it.
