Could you beat your favorite pokémon in a 1v1 fight /vp/? How badly would you win/lose?
>>26151031
It would mind wipe me or crush me before i could even swing a fist.
>>26151031
>Fighting your favourite pokemon
>>26151031
Uh, even Rattata tier shitmons are supposedly very dangerous to humans. Remember that a Zigzagoon almost did a number on Birch? A fuckin' Zigzagoon! Unless a Pokémon knows no damaging moves whatsoever it's a huge threat regardless of what it is.
>weavile
>gliscor
>rampardos
>zoroark
>blaziken
I wouldn't even look at them uglily without them ripping my face apart
>>26151076
this desu
they made oak come to you when you try to get into the grass for a reasonother than making sure you grab a starter
Virizion would smash my shit. The Swords of Justice are literally known for fighting humans to protect Pokemon.
Ampharos will electrocude me to death.
Is it a 'hey let's try a fight, see how's stronger' kind of deal, or 'I really don't like you at this moment, I'm going to hit you'?
>Lanturn
I doubt it'll hit that hard, but it's got huge HP
>>26151031
Yes. He refused to hit me back.
What have I done?!!!
>>26151031
>Physically beating your favorite pokémon
What are you, a monster?
>>26151071
>>26151634
>not wanting to really battle
I'd punch a dog
My favorites are obviously able to overpower me but with some lewd bullying I will weaken them
>Try to punch
>Whole arm ripped out
>Try to get closer
>Get a headsmash from the big-mouth, which is probably made out of metal and break a few ribs
I'm not very excited for this.
>1v1 against big guy Feraligatr
Nope.
>>26151031
>1v1 fight
I'll die horribly.
Unless if I'm allowed to use incessant petting as a fairy type move.
...really dude
>>26151115
I would gladly have a sparing match with Virizion to show her the progress of my swordplay.Would let Virizion teach you Swordplay?
>>26152466
>Swordplay
Are you talking about that thing where people pretend fight with balloons swords or something like that?
>>26152466I'd teach her rear end some swordplay alright.
>>26151031
>Yveltal
it can instantly suck the life out of my body so...
>>26152484
>The action or art of fighting with a sword
>>26152495I would do that too
>>26152496
that's not the only thing it'll be instantly sucking
>>26152513
That's just as bad as playing pretend.
I cant punch ghosts sadly
I knew this had bad idea written all over it
>>26152651
Nigga swordplay is the word that is used to describe sword combat and strategies
I think that fencing might be a sinonim
>tfw your pokemon starts to cry and get on the floor as soon as you raise your hand and you didn't even do anything yet
>>26154575
My favorite pokemon is eevee so I'd probably kill myself from sheer guilt when this happened. Unless of course Sun/Moon adds in a new evolution for eevee with low friendship, then I'd make sure to get the dex entry for it and then kill myself.
We'd never fight for real, though I'm pretty certain it could slap my shit if it wanted to.
>>26151031
no, it'stoo cute to fight
Depending on if the Garchomp is mine or not, he could...
>Option 1:
>Rips me to shreds
>Option 2:
>Knock me out and feel bad about doing it
>>26151031
No one could beat their favourite mon in a battle
>>26154987I-It's not like I wanted to make you faint... B-baka.
>>26151071
Nothing wrong with a little friendly sparring.
That being said, yeah, I'd get my ass handed to me. Probably get poisoned too if its got poison point.
>>26151031
Maybe? I feel like she'd choke me to death or something with her scarves.
>Ditto
If it transforms into something else I fucked
If it transforms into me that's an interesting match for sure
>>26151031
Is there any scenario that won't end with my mangled corpse?
>>26151031
No, its not like it resist fighting.
Its not like it's a fucking tanky fairy shit.
God forbid it uses Metronome.
>>26155539
Dress up as a species in it's egg-group and hope it sees you as potential mate.
...Otherwise, no. Just go lie down and cry as your favorite mon eats your mangled corpse.
Depends on if I pick Riolu or Lucario as my favorite. Riolu'd win because I wouldn't want to hurt it. Lucario'd straight up beat my ass.
>>26151031
It would use pheromones, or some strong scent to get me tired and then proceed to flatten me as a pancake with a Body Slam.
>>26156701
>he can't take a PU tier shitmon
Weakling.
>not just letting her "win" when she hits me with Sweet Kiss and Lovely Kiss
>>26156724
Good luck trying to take down a non-human thing that weighs at least 3 times as you with your bare hands.
At least if it's bipedal I can use some martial arts to take it down, but quadrupedal as it is, you can only rely in some low kicks to get to its weaker points. Plus its legs are too thick and strong to be a reasonable weak point.
>>26151031
>Gachomp
hahaha haha ha...
>>26156724
shitmon wouldn't necessarily mean it'd be easy to beat.
Imagine Beedrill, even without the mega. It's a giant bee the size of a 7 year old or so, with lances for arms
>>26156797
If they can use their moves I'm sure you using a lighter isn't that big of a deal.
How about we just watch idiocracy together instead
It'll kick my butt, unless I get a lucky shot with a thrown rock or something.
>>26156869
as long as you have no greek roots you should be fine anon, he'll go easy on you and just pretend
>>26151076
Birch was old, and zigzagoons are more territorial than they look
>>26151254
or eat you, if your into that shit
>>26157115
he'll be into that shit after about three and a half hours
>>26157098
Or he was just scared of Zigzagoons as real life people are scared of dogs.
>>26151076
>Unless a Pokémon knows no damaging moves whatsoever
Dodged a bullet there.
>Implying i'd want to fight a Braixen
Status moves would probably kill me. She could paralyze me with stun spore and then use leach seed so plants slowly eat me alive while I can't move.
>>26157753
kinky
I wouldn't want to be fighting my favorite pokemon. If I was forced to then I'd just bitch out.
>>26151031
How do i fight something made of water?
>>26157787
throw a block of pure sodium at it
>>26157787
Sponge
>>26157804
The last time I did any martial arts was in 2009. I wasn't good at it either.
Teach me auradog, then let's try.
>>26157787
1. Get a big bucket of liquid nitrogen
2. Pour it on Vaporeon
3. Kick the Vaporeon after it freezes
4. Feel bad about killing a Vaporeon
>>26157804
>>26157807
>>26157914
You don't have to kill, just beat it.
I would never fight eevee. Would sooner fall asleep by a fire reading a nice book while it snoozed on my lap.
That being said. I would stomp its shit in a fight. Just grab a big ass bat and smack it around.
Hurts to think about it.
>>26157946
thinking back to what I said about the liquid nitrogen, >>26157914, this might severely hurt the Vaporeon, but since it's made of water and can diffuse it's molecular cells in water, it might just be able to get back up like the T-1000 in Terminator 2
Yeah. I'm losing, and probably going to have my atoms scattered across the universe.
Unless it's 1v1 Dota. Then I'd... still probably lose. FeelsBadMan
Whelp, I'm not sure this would be much of a fair fight. I give myself two hits at minimum before my Pokemon wins. Anything higher and I'm getting lucky.
>>26158013
We need a pure Steel like that.
Fuck this, I'm just gonna let it happen.
Just get it over faster.
>>26152466
>>26152513
>>26152714
Mah niggas.
>>26151031
>that image
>with that topic
I'm getting mixed signals here
>>26158266
that guy who commissions those pictures is really attracted to virizion's anal cavity and as an owner of virizion merchandise its creeping me out
Fuck it, I can't bring myself to hurt the lil guy.not like it could do much in return
>>26158498
It could drop a bolt of fucking lightning on you.
>>26159359
>using furret as a special attacker
I honestly doubt any human could beat any pokemon.
>>26159506
He didn't say it'd be a very strong bolt of lightning
>>26159516
I can beat any pokemon so long as its male
>>26151049
this image depresses me greatly
fighting typhlosion? hell no, id end up like this
>>26158300
jesus christ dude
>ask the audino to cease hostilities
>fight ends
>>26151031
feraligator
Unless I'm Steve Irwin, Im fucked, although gators are easier to handle than crocs, still pretty fucked.
>>26159538
Heh I see what you did there.
>>26159538
I said beat, not beat off
>>26156755
Kick that shit as if it where a child
>>26159516
What about spoink? Pick it up, it's heart stops, done.
>>26159895
It could mind trick you into putting it down.
Or it could bounce off of you.
>>26159895
truly arceus' greatest invention
>>26158019
You find out there are 6 clones of you in your bedroom.
When hunting, this Pokémon pins the prey to the ground under its massive body. It then eats the helpless victim using the large mouth on its stomach.
No
