welfare ranks edition
>Ongoing/Upcoming Tournaments
http://www.hltv.org/events/upcoming/
http://www.gosugamers.net/counterstrike
>Competitive News
http://www.hltv.org
>Wiki
http://wiki.teamliquid.net/counterstrike/Main_Page
>PUG Services
[FREE] http://cevo.com/event/cs-globaloffensive/downloads
[FREE] http://www.faceit.com
[PAID BOTNET] http://play.esea.net
>Betting/Trading/Item Related
http://i-am-fat.org/csgo-skins/
http://goaggro.com
http://csgolounge.com
http://csgobackpack.net
http://www.gosugamers.net
Always inspect in game, always assume the worst. Bet what you can afford to lose and most importantly always do the opposite of what /csgog/ says.
>Game Mechanic Info
Damage Chart: http://www.schuzak.jp/cs-go/dmgchart.html
Recoil Mechanics: http://twowordbird.com/articles/csgo-recoil-mechanics
>Ranks & Stats
http://csgo-stats.com
http://www.hltv.org/?pageid=183&gameid=2
http://www.gosugamers.net/counterstrike/rankings#team
>Game Enhancements
Config Tool: http://csgohelp.com/autoexec
Crosshair: http://csgohelp.com/crosshair
HUD: http://www.spddl.de/csgo_english-txt/csgo_multi-txt
mongol edition
>Watching Streams
Livestreamer: http://livestreamer.readthedocs.org/en/latest
Open Source Twitch Chat: http://sourceforge.net/projects/getchatty
>How to git gud
Do this EVERYDAY: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SlCRfTmBSGs
Watch this EVERYDAY: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NUgKRtAJqwU
>Useful websites and maps/How to practice
Read and watch everything here:http://pastebin.com/zTwcpC1q
1st for reddit
>one operation in all of 2015
>one operation in all of 2015 and 2016
>>127224816
>>127224819
>>127224850
we get it, you vape
>>127224945
vape?
yeah i vape
>>127224945
But I don't
>>127225034
hello reddit
where my /csgog/ bf at?
It's not uncommon to hear bits of other players' housemates' conversations when you're in Teamspeak, but none of us were prepared for this one.
The game was going normally, we had a nice lead, and we heard one of our friends talking to his girlfriend.
We overheard her ask, "How come you can see the other guys through the wall?"
He abandoned the game and went offline.
RIP
>>127225137
right here~
>>127225397
good boy~
defuse
How do I get over an energy drink addiction?
I haven't had one today and I literally want to die. Tomorrow I'll feel even worse.
>>127225810
plant
jesus fuck well done valve, literally made a game worse than Source
derank from gn2 to gn1 despite doing this fucking good in a literal 1v5 game that i had to waste 20 mins of my life on with no opportunity to literally stop playing the game
why the fuck does anyone still play MM anymore? it's a shit version of a community comp.
>>127225806
>tfw three (3[III]) of these were literally of me
>>127225846
Get yourself a nice tall glass with a lid on it and fill it with iced water
drink it through games and refill it between matches
get your sugar/caffeine through other sources that won't give you diabetes within a few months, like a small chunk of dark chocolate
>>127225846
just buy some caffeine pills
>>127225897
lol get rekt shitter
it should exist
>>127225846
>energy drink addiction
is that even a thing? anyway you can always taper off
t.alcoholic
>>127226069
>was mg1/top gn4
>shitter
what
>>127225961
no its all me
>>127226142
it's just caffeine addiction although you can really get a psychological addiction to any pleasurable/satisfying acitivity be it consuming drugs or chocolate
>>127226153
no not all, at least three were me
>>127226143
yes
>>127226143
>>127226143
lol
>>127225846
I know the feel man, trust me I do.
It's so fucking hard to get off them.
you literally just have to stop drinking them. I know that's retarded advice, since I had one today.
But we just need to stop drinking them anon.
>>127226143
SHITTER
H
I
T
T
E
R
>>127225897
if i got this team in community comp there would literally be no issue:
>would have fun because no german squeakers screaming down my ear
>would kick teammates and it would actually go through
>when 2 teammates left, one of the enemies would join my team and make it 4v4, and actually make the teams and game fair and balanced
>could banter in the chat with the other team
>not care about dying/losing since i wouldn't lose some stupid badge
>literally would have the ability to leave the server, and not worry about being banned from playing for 30 mins, or still having my badge lost
just fuck MM honestly
>>127225846
stop drinking it
just like any addiction, just stop using it
I know it sucks and it's hard but it's the only way
IT'S THE ONLY WAY YOU'RE GOING TO GET BETTER
>>127226482
>>127226351
I've drank around 5 cups of coffee today, (with 2 really full spoons of instant coffee powder). I feel like shit. My head hurts. I'm slow as fuck. I can't think straight.
Literally suicidal. Tomorrow will be even worse I bet. Fuck this is hard.
>>127226143
>>127226287
>>127226309
>>127226337
>>127226367
>>127226821
easiest b8 of my life
>>127226957
>>127226957
baited for this EXACT response
you got fucking played idiot lmao
>>127226957
>implying you're me
kek nice try famalot
legit didnt know about this "shitter" meme you redditors have
nice autistic reaction meme responses tho
>>127227123
what fucking pos community do you come from if this is the first time you come across being called a shitter
>>127227269
mg1 isnt shitter tier tho
>>127227330
why not? i've been using the term badge shitter since 2014 and that refers to DMG because all of those obnoxious redditors that think they know more about the game than they do used to be DMG back then
>>127227330
Shitter tier is anything under LE.
>>127227501
lmao shit LE's say
if you're not GE and at least in the master league then you're fucking useless
>>127227670
desu if you're not olofmeister then you're shit.
>>127227330
>mg1 isnt shitter tier tho
>>127227768
true desu
>>127227768
well i've beaten olofmeister in MM
pbuh
>>127227960
>>127227932
How many Major titles have you won?
>>127227984
peace be upon hammies
>>127227993
zero but MM is the real deal anyway LAN's can gtfo tbqh
>>127228101
>zero but MM is the real deal anyway LAN's can gtfo tbqh
lol this shitter
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YocsxFL5IYM
>>127228151
MM dust 2 only is the real final destination for seeing who is the best
shitties like olof that rely on their team can't do shit there and get BTFO by people like me
this general dead af senpai desu
>>127228959
is this in reddit yet
>>127229059
Idk fiffy tweeted it
>>127226402
>played 10 mins of community
>actually had fun
>actually liked the players
>actually smiled
just fuck your game up famms
more memes
Put 4chan.org/vg/csgog in google images
>>127229858
why
>reddit in flames over ranks
>they all went down like 2 ranks
>meanwhile I'm still global
>just got my smurf to supreme without even trying
Feels good not being retarded.
>>127230227
>plays matchmaking
>claims not to be retarded
lol
https://twitter.com/questionmark_as/status/683282380833058817
c9 device?
>>127230437
does the word undramatic not tell you that it's nothing as big as that
>>127230437
oh wait
https://twitter.com/devveCS/status/683332821939781634
is this like being trans for video games?
>>127230553
what
>>127230553
what the fuck
>>127230683
he identifies as devve now
>>127230553
>>127230743
well yeah he changed his nickname fair enough
i mean device was a pretty dumb name so i understand that he might prefer to use this nickname that he is already well known by
>>127230809
no dumber than anyone else's nickname
devve isn't even a word nigga
>>127230809
device is miles better than devve
>>127230809
yeah I'm sure that more people recognise his by "devve" then "device".
totally.
>>127230872
How do you even pronounce it?
de-veee?
dev-vee?
>>127225897
>be me
>be dmg
>rank update
>lose first game
>instant derank even though i was winning a lot recently and closer to an uprank prior to update
>whatever valves new ranking shit
>win next game, followed by a loss
>win another
>get deranked
>after win
>as 2nd in team, with decent stats and against similarly ranked opponents
>get deranked again during next few days despite winning more than losing
fucking volvo just take 2 ranks off of everybody instead of shitting up the experience for 2 weeks
>>127231030
I was supreme/low global and didn't downrank.
playing against same people, having similar matches at the same rank. Valve just nuked the booster shits like you.
>>127230979
https://translate.google.com/#da/en/devve
>>127230967
i didn't say more well known by
but he has already nicked in pro games as devve for quite a long time before this "official announcement"
i can understand that he might've felt like he doesn't like his old nickname that he has probably come up with when he was like 14
i'm surprised there are not more seasoned pro players changing their nickname, although in csgo there aren't really many pro players who have such a dumb alias that i'd expect them to eventually get tired of it
>bought this shit randomly on the 24th
>already 65-ish hours played
I'm improving a lot but I'm way too scared to queue for comp. Should I wait? If so, how long? I only somewhat know the maps themselves and the angles on Dust2 and Inferno. And Office (it's my fav map) but Office isn't very relevant I think
>>127231327
almost all of them change their official name when they start going pro, but use meme names otherwise, look at either fpl.
BUY DEVICE STICKERS
THEY'VE ALREADY DOUBLED IN PRICE
>>127230869
i think names that don't mean anything are better than words that mean completely boring everyday things
the words "device" just makes me think of that "your device is safe to remove" pop up in windows
>>127231409
Start playing comp asp
>>127230553
my sides
>>127231634
but dignitas device sounding dank while dignitas devve sounds shit
aren't the cobble cases supposed to be $50, when the FUCK are they going to ride already
holy fuck there are so many cheaters on community servers what the hell
>>127231409
the silver ranks are there for a reason
it doesnt matter that you suck ass so do the other players you play with
>>127231128
i was winning most of my matches beforehand and about 90% at my current rank
>>127232012
people come to community servers to configure their aim assists and triggerbots since there is no risk of getting OW'd from them
>>127232332
maybe thats some of them but a lot of the cheaters I played with were just completely blatant and were barely even trying to hide it
>>127232194
so why didnt u rank up?
literally noones streaming wtf
>>127232662
twitch tv/armshouse
>>127232662
I am :3
>>127232662
My bby Mezarthys is.
>>127232932
link
>>127232662
siglemic is lad
>>127232510
i wasn't boosted and played good on my rank, was LE for a few matches but got deranked because i was to bad.
I am not saying deflating the ranks is bad, it was very much needed. But they should have just taken 2 ranks from everybody and then implemented their new ranking system.
If i get constantly deranked from winning over 66% of my matches it's fucking annoying. Also when i get deranked after winning a match vs the same ranks with good stats there is something very wrong with their shit
>>127232662
>not watching the magic: the gathering tournament on scglive
lol its like you arent even cool
>>127233012
>>127232970
>>127232886
literally who
>>127233187
>not knowing our lads siglemic and james bardolph
uhh... reddit?
>>127233140
>But they should have just taken 2 ranks from everybody
Why should high Elo GE's like me who had already been stable GE's for months before the welfare ranks happened be punished along with you welfare kids?
Are people in ESL better? I'm sick and tired of getting MM with shitters, flamers, idiots, trolls, cheaters. It's way too rare to get into a team that communicates and knows what they are doing.
>>127233140
>still not understanding the ranking change
hi leddit
>>127233173
>not wearing shorts and watching magic: the gathering on twitch
LOL
twitch tv/mezzarthy
waifu
>>127232012
The game is on discount
>>127232972
I lied. I don't stream and if I did people on /csgog/ would just be mean
>>127233187
>not knowing who armshouse is
reddit get out
>>127233303
If you deserve to be GE you'll be back there in no time.
I fucking shit on everybody in my rank and can't uprank for the love of god. It's so frustrating. Almost every game i lose it's because i either have a leaver or some 20 hours smurfer in the enemy team. But since valve decided to go full retardmode on this i am getting more bored with every unchallenging game i play
>>127232662
im streaming lad
>>127233514
I wouldn't be mean especially not if you're cute
>>127233305
just play community my man
>>127233572
I am cute, but last time people were mean
>>127233596
community servers are filled with cheaters and the worst players imaginable
>>127233596
I did that for many years in source. I got CSGO specifically because I like the competitive aspect that MM brings. A 5v5 match, I find, is much more fun that just running around randomly on a map with 20 other people. It's just so full of shitters, though.
>>127233978
>cheaters
rarely
>worst players
not even close. 10x less griefers or squeakers or noobs or non-english fags than mm
>>127234161
literally the opposite of true in both cases
lurpiss beefing with our boy nicolai "devve" "device" redditz
>>127234120
community comp, dude. go into browse servers and type in "comp" or "5v5" in the tags
like mm comp, but less shitters and you can quit games and no ranks to worry about
>>127234228
kek what shitty servers do you play on then? [.RO]s? nosteam? kek
>he felt for the amd meme
>he can't stretch his meme resolution because of the amd meme
get memed
and for euros, get mehmed
did you stock up on the device stickers, magog?
>>127235026
more like
>he fell for the stretched meme
>he fell for the 4:3 meme
>>127235143
>falling for that shit
never again you fucking faggot
https://www.teamliquidpro.com/news/2016/01/02/a-s1mple-pickup
im fucking ready for the NA FPL boys
>>127233641
Please stream I'll be nice to you
coming to L O N D O N in four weeks
any cute /csgog/ boys want to meet up~?
>>127235259
>le native resolution man
absolutely disgusting
>>127235313
>adren STILL hasn't been kicked
>>127235259
>he doesn't play 4:3 stretched
hello silver
>>127235313
>>127235515
adreN will get replaced as soon as pronax's visa gets approved
>>127235313
YES. THIS IS WHAT FPL NEEDS.
>>127235313
oh boy
>>127235403
I'll be there to smash the life out of you with a hammer
>>127235026
>implying you know what you are talking about
>>127235627
no fucking way
prolapse in liquid
how do you pronounce devve
>>127235313
big fucking mistake
>>127235751
de-V-fe
hiko&s1mple carry ez
why does the csgo community collectively pretend that thorin is funny?
is it some kind of joke where we all see if we can trick an autist into thinking he's hilarious to see what happens
>>127235708
why are you being so mean?
>>127235751
dev-veh
>>127235856
>he cant handle the banter
;>
>>127235856
we do it to make reddit mad
>>127235859
because you are human garbage, worthless
>>127235856
spend some time in another esports scene (that isn't starcraft). thorin and rlewis are miles better than 90% of league or dota writers/casters. shit, i tried to listen to an esports podcast a week or so ago and got to listen to the csgo guy for TL and he didn't even know who moe was
why the fuck are there retards on this general that don't play with positively-wrapped screen setting
>produces a fisheye effect to enlarge enemies near you
>curves screen with the curve of your eyes, creating a natural feel
>twists corners of screen to make them more circular and closer to center
>looks like a smile, which subconsciously makes you feel better and rage less
why the fuck do you losers just play on 4:3 instead
>>127235751
diva
>>127236150
looks cool how do i do it
>>127232662
I can stream
I just dont have a mic, dont have a webcam, and I'm shit
>stopped playing csgo
>remember i still had like 100 of those esl capsules from 2014
>4€
lmao
>>127236260
Do it!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nSJ7AvrFhlE
our guy does it again
reddit BTFO
tl:dw version: s1mple a god and maybe soon top1 plaer
>>127236150
hi seized, didn't know you spoke english
>>127236371
s1mple is a madman who gives no fucks
gotta respect that
>>127235980
why are you such a sad, angry little man?
>>127236354
I've also never streamed, so I have no idea what to do
>>127236371
They need to get rid of adreN though
LIQUID PROLAPSE FUCKING WHEN
>>127236503
thoring said the same, but as of lately, he actually gives a fuck and tries to be not so "toxic".
And I fear that could have a negative impact on his gameplay
>>127236591
fuckboy adren can suck his dick while he carries the game with hiko
>>127236520
kill yourself
>>127236695
>adren will never transition to a qt girl
>you'll never massage trans adren's prostate
>>127236695
>>127236962
>>127236520
human garbage
what happened to the ranks?
just saw im nova 1 after quitting at MG1 couple months ago
how do we get adren off liquid
>if only adren wasn't on turd liquid we woulda win every major x(
>>127236962
JDIMSA
>>127237094
why would we want that, reddit?
>>127237094
kidnap him and turn him into my sex slave
>>127237332
flush yourself
>>127237094
tell prolapse to join liquid
>trying to level my fresh bought smurf
>people keep kicking me from dm's
jfc whats wrong with people
>>127237260
>stealing feels' memes
fuck off lad
>>127237332
only if you share
>>127237092
same
top gn4 to gn1
recommend not playing for a few months until ranks settle or more vacwaves, to avoid hitting silver
>>127237896
lol
>>127236695
don't worry anon. steel and dazed and moe will be his friends and they will teach him how to win with toxicity
>>127237896
Not playing will make it even worse lol
People who haven't played in a few months decayed as far as grom GE to DMG
>>127238196
deranked twice in the past 3 games (2 losses) i played
despite doing well
>>127237896
you will just drop no matter what cuz u a shitter and your mmr is silver now
>>127225846
If you are still there you just have to get through feeling like hell for a day or two, drink a fuck ton of water, hydration helps everything.
Caffeine withdrawl is a bitch
>>127238418
because the change was the mmr required for each rank
>>127238468
sry im a carrier ;^)
what's up everybody it's Cr1TiKaL
Reminder that MMR is unchanged, so you are literally being matched with the same people you have been before the rank distribution changes
>>127238602
>tfw cr1tikal sucks now
joe jimba
>>127238418
There is a hidden rating number behind your account.
Let's say 1000
Before the change having a 1000 rating meant you were GN4, after the change it means you are GN1.
You are not deranking based on your performance, but based in the rating that determines your rank.
Not playing and letting your rank decay actually lowers that rating over time which means you'll derank even more once you play again.
>>127236150
There is nothing natural about that at all
>>127238850
pretty retarded tBh
not interested in playing with this shitty valve mechanic
>>127239031
see ya
>>127239031
They just changed the cut offs for each rank to make it a bellcurve centered around GN4.
With the old cut off system the high rank were way too common.
http://counterstrike.wikia.com/wiki/Heavy_Assault_Suit
juggernaut suit incoming
>>127239106
not on MM my friend
>>127239194
space marine vs eldar when
>>127239194
please no
>>127239194
deep strike pods and assault marine jump packs when
>quick deep strike on site b we need backup
>>127239194
UAV when
>>127239194
they need to add a gun that does more damage to counter this now, maybe that's what the r8 was for?
>>127239194
lightning claw knives power armor only when
>>127239194
>OP awp now takes 3 shots to kill
I'm not saying that it will be buffed to the insanely OP version we had when it was released but the R8 is gonna get buffed in the future. Nearly nobody uses it now.
>>127239849
honestly valve will be so scared of it that they will take forever to change it again
>>127239849
So when are we expecting a M249 buff if thats the logic we are going off?
>>127239849
so? not every gun needs to be viable
>tfw you have a cute /csgog/ bf
>>127239194
it'll be a skin
>>127240450
neck yourself
>>127240450
beck yourself
>>127240450
human refuse
>>127240719
>>127240856
>permavirgins that will never have a cute bf
literally flush yourselves you ugly sods
>>127241129
kill yourself
>>127240719
>>127240803
>>127240856
wow rude wtf
>>127239970
I really wish you'd realize how retarded you are
>>127236591
This team would be nuts if Dazed was unbanned and he replaced him
>>127241209
>>127241129
shut the fuck up
>>127241170
I'll fucking stage a murder suicide with your family you waste of oxygen
>>127241230
kys anime
>>127235313
But isn't s1mple a cheater?
>>127241358
no he's just a shitter
no one wants to play with him
>>127241259
I will beat you senseless and hurl your mangled body on a bed of nails then drive you into them with a sledge hammer
>>127236371
>people still think thorin is relevant in any way other than le epic bantz! xD
>>127241358
>>127241436
he cheated dont kid yourself
>>127241209
put your head in a noose and jump off a chair
>>127241358
yes
for some reason cheating is ok in csgo as long as you wait a year
unless you're kqly or fxyo and then its like nah lol
but otherwise its like ye go for it
Fuck, if Overwatch still requires GN1, doesnt that mean we lost a lot of OWers? gj valve, expect to see tons more greifers/hackers in your games lads
>>127242025
once you have it you cant lose it, you can only lower your overwatch skill rating
>>127241818
that's because his cheating only got caught by ESL Wire which is not that reliable anticheat and has been known to cause false positives
not saying s1mple didn't cheat, just explaining why his ESL ban isn't a bigger deal
it's like how m0e got caught for cheating by ESEA's AC so they slapped him a 2 year ban and he waited it out and now he is free to play
>>127241353
never
>>127243160
i want to hong your meiling
>>127243327
wat
>>127243160
I HAVE COME TO DESTROY YOU
Does this game support gamepads? It's on sale for 50% off.
'Yes' or 'No', that's the only answer I need. I don't need any other types of feedback. Keep the patronizing stuff to yourself please.
>>127243880
fuck you
>>127243880
yes
>>127243880
yes
>>127243880
kill youself
>>127243880
fuck you
>>127242323
>5 wins away from OW
>gn1 right now
>probably gonna hit silver 4 before i stop deranking
JUST FUCK
MY SHIT
THE FUCK
UP
>>127243880
kill yourself
but yes
then again, you can also play papers please with a gamepad
>>127243880
>playing counterstrike with a gamepad
what the heck
>>127243880
flush yourself
simple is just taking kids skins this is so dumb
>>127244387
little known fact, papers please was inspired by this from tim and eric
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CMbKalNq2gs
>>127243880
noose your neck, buddy
>>127244979
So? Other pros do the same except not so blatantly on stream. He don't give a shit.
>>127246523
yeah pasha drowns in childrens skines
the steam marketplace is such a fucking scummy place seriously lol
>>127246523
its boring and i want to be entertained
>>127239194
WE DID IT REDDIT
>Richard lewis isn't okay with the word rape
>Is okay with calling people pussies
Lol
