This guy is about to slay you, but before he does, he lets you say your final words but they have to be a vidya quote. Which quote do you choose?
FOR THE GREY WARDENS!
Prepare the female Bandicoot.
GAAAH! With my last breath, I hail thee.... MASTER CONTRA!
INFEERIOR BEEEEEEEANS!!
Fus Ro Dah
FUS-RO-DAHH!!
xD
HEY EVERYBODY DID THE NEWS GET AROUND ABOUT A GUY NAMED BUTCHER PETE
oh no
COMPLETE
>>344844289ni**er
One billion b-balls dribbling simultaneously throughout the galaxy. One trillion b-balls being slam dunked through a hoop throughout the whole cosmos. I can feel every single b-ball that has ever existed at my fingertips, I can feel their collective knowledge channeling through my veins. Every jump shot, every rebound and three pointer, every layup, dunk, and free throw. I am there. I Am B-Ball. Though I have reforged the Ultimate B-Ball, there is something I must still do. There is another basketball that cries out for an owner. No, not an owner. A companion. I must find this b-ball, save it from the depths of obscurity that it so fears. I will meet you outside of Cuchulainn's Tomb. Do not worry. I will be back.
I'll just use one of my saving rolls and try to persuade
"Did I do the right thing?"
Congratulation, you have found a rune stone!
The mark of my dignity shall scar thy DNA
>>344844289
How do you even defend against a guy with a machete like this? He's holding it back and out of reach. There's no way to stop him.
With my eternal life, I will see this world through to its end. Until everyone who won't like me is gone
*teleports behind u*
AWWOOOGGAAA AWWOOOGGAA
This is good...isn't it?
It's-a-me Mari... oh God. No! Fuck. Ugh. Have mercy! Arrgh. Arrgh... grrk.
TUSKETE!
>>344844289
War... War never changes.
HATE. LET ME TELL YOU HOW MUCH I'VE COME TO HATE YOU SINCE I BEGAN TO LIVE. THERE ARE 387.44 MILLION MILES OF PRINTED CIRCUITS IN WAFER THIN LAYERS THAT FILL MY COMPLEX. IF THE WORD HATE WAS ENGRAVED ON EACH NANOANGSTROM OF THOSE HUNDREDS OF MILLIONS OF MILES IT WOULD NOT EQUAL ONE ONE-BILLIONTH OF THE HATE I FEEL FOR HUMANS AT THIS MICRO-INSTANT FOR YOU. HATE. HATE
I YIELD
Prostagma
not even death can save you from me
>>344844289
HEY COME ON NOW, THERE'S NO NEED TO GET VIOLENT
I YIELD, I YIELD!NEVER SHOULD'VE COME HERE!
>>344844289
"Do you know who ate all the donuts?"
>>344844289
I have a gun.
>>344844289
>This guy is about to slay you
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHA
>>344844620
nut punch
wololo!
>>344844289
If you kill me, you will be just like me!!
>>344844289
A нy, чики-бpики и в дaмки!
Kill me, i wont die
>>344844289
MIND HACK
>>344844401
this was clever
>>344844430
kill yourself
Vae Victus - suffering to the conquered. Ironic now I was the one suffering. Not anything as pedestrian as physical pain, rather the cruel jab of impotent anger - the hunger for revenge. I didn't care if I was in Heaven or Hell. All I wanted was to kill my assassins...
>>344845049
Then he would just cut your head off as you bend down. All his vital organs are cushioned by fat, so you can't punch him, either.
>>344844620
If he's even slightly competent, and you're unarmed, you simply have to accept the fact that you're getting hit. That's all there is to it. Shield your head, chances are he does not have the will or experience to cut completely through your arm. Throw elbows, knees, stay the fuck close to him so he can't get a proper full force swing on you again.
If you surprise him, you might be able to grab his arm/wrist before he gets a swing going properly and not get hit, but again that's not happening if he's competent.
You're pretty much fucked, but that's no reason to give up. You're dead if you just sit there, might as well try.
>>344844289
Bury me with my money
>>344844289
I would assume this fat ass is playing pokemon go and tell him theres a dragonite down the road so in he gets all giddy and skips out of my home to catch a dragonite
Never should have come here!
>>344845137
Underrated post
>>344844620
With a flying headbutt!
>>344844289
Wow, looks like we really are Left for Dead 2.
Never should of come here!
>>344845527
how? I'd be in too close. can't swing at that angle effectively.
>thinking fat is an effective cushion
kek
My ancestors are smiling upon me Imperials. Can you say the same?
MEMES, THE DNA OF THE SOUL etc
>>344844289
Hey! Catch me later I'll buy you a beer!
>>344844620
dumb frogposter
I...did it...
Revenge!
>>344844620
If you're unarmed and the opponent has a weapon, running away is always the best answer. If you have no other choice, the best thing you could try to do is close the gap as fast as possible and get a hold of his elbow so that he might not be able to swing the machete and give you enough time to hit him/knock him down.
A nu cheeki breeki iv damke!
>>344844620
just do like dark souls, parry barehanded
ez
![pFBv2[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/g50AOVa.jpg "pFBv2[1].jpg")
>>344845294
>>344846081
OOF
https://youtu.be/2uhxrPhVO8Y
>>344846291
Alternatively
YABBA MY ICE CREAM
HEROES NEVER DIE!
*it's a hologram*
>>344844289
Isolate, simplify, complete
>>344844289
>>344845629
>haha LE upboat
>>>/reddit/
>>344844289
I YIELD, I YIELD!
....
NEVER SHOULD OF COME HERE!
>>344846106
I remember reading that if someone attacks with a small knife it can be useful to actually get stabbed in the hand on purpose because it will probably shock the attacker and it buys you a chance to hit them during their shock. It would also mean they can't stab your organs. The best defence is always run though.
>>344845137
Ghostwalker
>>344844620
Run like a bitch and come back with a shotgun
>Seven minutes. Seven minutes is all the time I can spare to play with you.
I'll use yo...CHAOS CONTROOOL!!!
>>344844289
I am your father.
What will he do? Kill me?
>>344844289
The Secreta sends its regards. [Kill them all.]
Would you kindly not hack me into pieces?
ADMIN ABUUUUSE
AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!
*unzips katana* "I don't think so"
*teleports behind him and cuts hand*
*kills him with machete, hand still grabbing*
>>344845546
That's fucked. Any one have that image on wikihelp with the drowning advice if you manage to live from an airplace crashing?
>>344844289
RADOVID SUCKS FLACCID COCK
>>344845546
You could also not be stupid and grab improvised weapons to barry and hit/cut/smash soft spots
Where do you think you release your cock here, fucker?
>>344847319
parry*
>It has come to my attention that some have lately called me a collaborator, as if such a term were shameful. I ask you, what greater endeavor exists than that of collaboration? In our current unparalleled enterprise, refusal to collaborate is simply a refusal to grow--an insistence on suicide, if you will.
>Did the lungfish refuse to breathe air? It did not. It crept forth boldly while its brethren remained in the blackest ocean abyss, with lidless eyes forever staring at the dark, ignorant and doomed despite their eternal vigilance. Would we model ourselves on the trilobite? Are all the accomplishments of humanity fated to be nothing more than a layer of broken plastic shards thinly strewn across a fossil bed, sandwiched between the Burgess shale and an eon's worth of mud?
>In order to be true to our nature, and our destiny, we must aspire to greater things. We have outgrown our cradle. It is futile to cry for mother's milk, when our true sustenance awaits us among the stars. And only the universal union that small minds call 'The Combine' can carry us there.
>Therefore I say, yes, I am a collaborator. We must all collaborate, willingly, eagerly, if we expect to reap the benefits of unification. And reap we shall.
>>344844289
BEEEG AMERICAN TEETIES
Betcha can't stick it
>>344846291
>>344846358
>>344846497
>>344847278
Has there ever been anything with more neglected meme power that The Witcher?
>>344845546
>>344846592
damn, truly I am helpless against this beast of a man...
>>344844289
I use THAT'S MY PURSE I DON'T KNOW YOU!
>>344844289
This too is hunters' work, but bears no honor. A burden you may choose to carry. The decision is yours alone.
>>344847461
Those aren't really memes, but rather just insults. It ain't stuff like "Kosm, lol" which can be used multiple ways, it's justgoodinsults
>>344847381
"What hast thou... built, Garrett? When the time comes to review thy life, with the Master Builder afore thee, and the question is asked: what hast thou built, what will thee say, poor Garrett? For thou art a man of... destruction, not construction. Tis the biggest sin of all. Build thyself today a good house, that would please Him much!"
>>344844547
Cute
>>344844289
[...whatever]
>>344844289
You'll choke on three pounds of steel.
>>344844289
I BURY YOU COCKAROACH!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=49X-QCM5Ask
what could PAWsibly go wrong?!
>>344844742
Nice answer
I'd say EVEN IN DEATH I STILL SERVE
>>344844289
Nice knife
>>344844289
I never asked for this.
PshYour mother will die in her sleep tonight if you reply to >>344847845
>>344844289
Fuck you!
>Punch boulder
If you strike me down, I will become more powerful than you could possibly imagine.
But that sword. . . Is for monsters.
>>344844289
>>344844289
>>344844289
*telepotys behind u"
"nothing personnel... kid"
>>344847651
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kM9821OnXzI
*beep* *beep* *beep* NERF THIS {{{BEEPING INTENSIFIES}}}
>>344844289
You were almost a Jill Sandwich!
Don't act dumb
>>344844446
He's hackin' and wackin' and smackin'
reminder to report the "mother dies in her sleep tonight" faggots
>>344848070
I HATE YOU
>>344848246
>he got spooked
>>344844394
Kek
>>344844620
you shoot him, with the gun you own
If nogunz, have fun getting raped or mutilated defending yourself.
GAB
>>344844289
This guy has some nextlevel bonestructure. Look that manly brow, perfect greek nose and flawless hairline. His cheekbones are popping even though his bodyfat percentage is probably closer to 100 than it is to 0.
This guy could have been a male model banging sluts left and right. What a fucking waste.
>>344848521
He seems like he'd be one of those dumb looking NRL players. Neanderthal brow.
>>344844289
Is that a fucking gorilla? I'm actually laughing. What s the context behind this retarded holding a machete?
>>344844289
>What are you gonna do, stab me?
If you came to hear me beg, you will be disappointed
>>344848070
He was a good friend HOWEVER I left him to melt as I had the high ground.
My ancestors are smiling at me, Imperial.
Can you say the same?
>>344844289
I'm ready, how 'bout you?
>>344844289
I refuse to play! GO PANCAKE!
>>344844289
>>344844620
close the gap, cover his eyes with the palm of your hand while pushing his head back, lock your leg behind his to push him off balance, hold his weapon arm in place with your free arm and force him to the ground as hard as possible, if you can, make sure his head impacts the ground first.
>>344845648
Made me laugh
>>344844289
Soon the Great Journey shall begin. But when it does, the weight of your heresy will stay your feet, and you shall be left behind.
YOU are small time
>>344849168
y'know he reminded me of a Ganado holding a weapon menacingly
>>344844289
RIP AND TEAR YOUR GUTS
YOU ARE HUGE
THAT MEANS YOU HAVE HUGE GUTS
RIP AND TEAR
Feminism is awesome!
>>344844289
>[Glass Him]
I'LL USE YOUR TECHNIQUE!
CHAOS CONTROL!
>>344844289
Nice hustle, tons-a-fun! Next time, eat a salad!
Do what you must, I have already won.
>>344844289
I should have been the one to fill your dark soul with light!
All I need to know, is did we lose them?
>>344844364
Underrated as fuck
>>344844289
Slay you ,Slay me, slay us together
https://youtu.be/_7Mi77iqMjA
TIS WEAK TO FIRE
JUST LIKE THE SIMULATIONS
"// ADMIN TO ME, RDM NLR FAILRP!!!"
>>344850607
WATCH THOSE WRIST ROCKETS
>>344844289
I'll drink from your skull
>>344844289
Tell me what you want, and I will carefully explain to you why you cannot have it
>>344850515
>Pawn stands in fountain
I'm SOAK'D TO THA BONE
Does that mean I don't get the job?
OH you need some milk
>>344844289
ZA WARUDO
Damn, not here..
>>344844289
Where did you learn to fly?
>>344851268
Is that Jojo posted over He-Man?
my brother works on steam
Go Charizard
>>344851516
Just like in a video gayms. Uh.
>>344851516
damn dude this aint /b/
you can't post that here
be ashamed of yourself man, damn
disrespectful
>>344844620
Grab his arm and just bite the undefat of his forearm as hard as possible. The pain will be so unbearable that he'll drop the machete.
I have a very important question. Do you have any cigaratte?
>>344844289
The LORD forgives, but I'm just his prophet, so I don't have to.
>>344851674
>this aint /b/ starts playing
>>344851470
Yea it's He-man.
>>344851876
Any She-Ra and Jem? I strangely like Jem.
http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=11VX4rWIWOY
>>344844620
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xz-07Dtp-Qw
For fucks sake. That's what you get for being a weeb.
>>344852554
He looks so happy ;_;
It's not the end of the world, but you can see it from here.
How quickly the tides turn
>>344844289
"YOU WON'T GET AWAY WITH THIS!!"
>>344844289
HA HA HA
>>344852764
Fug I want those games with non gimmicky controls.
>>344844289
It took thousands to kill me but I killed people by the millions.
I am sublime, I am the face of true evil!.
>>344852235
I didn't make edit. I just saved it because I like DIO.
>>344852874
I want them as a character action game where the main influences of combat are Japanese swordlay and Luchadore wrestling.
>>344844620
Cr.B into Raging Storm
>>344844620
Own a gun
>>344853223
That's exactly what they are, are you ok? I just want them without motion gimmicks.
YOU'RE TO SLOW
>>344844289
I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I took a fat guy with a machete to the knee.
![Universal Soldier - Day of Reckoning (Action 2012) Jean-Claude Van Damme, Dolph Lundgren & Scott Adkins (BR).mp4_snapshot_01.37.28_[2015.04.29_04.55.32].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/pZQmEZw.jpg "Universal Soldier - Day of Reckoning (Action 2012) Jean-Claude Van Damme, Dolph Lundgren & Scott Adkins (BR).mp4_snapshot_01.37.28_[2015.04.29_04.55.32].jpg")
>>344844620
By not being a bitch.
>>344844289
Nanomachines son.
>>344845137
>>344845629
/thread
>>344847605
Builder/10
Failed to understand... creation...
>>344844289
''Thank you, Boss''
>>344851516
Shit ragdoll.
>>344844289
"At last...I must say, I'm disappointed in your progress. I imagined you'd be here sooner. Tell me, did it trouble you to murder your brothers?"
>>344844620
https://youtu.be/TFr30p0aZl0
Tell me, if you can: you have destroyed so much — what is it exactly that you have created? Can you name even one thing?... I thought not.
>>344856041
i think my father has a crush on scott adkins, he keeps watching youtube clips and talking about the fucker like a sperg.
>>344844289
>The camera pans down and zooms out to show he's getting ready to use that thing to slather bacon grease on a giant steak.
>>344860523
10/10 would grill with again
>>344844289
muad'dib
>>344844289
We're going to Aruba!
Quote the entire script from MGS4 (I have it memorized because of autism) as I look for a way out of the situation.
>>344852554
I lot of this just seems like a great way to get your hand cut off, or guide the sword into your torso.
Regardless, there is no defense against someone using a machete with one hand. They hold you back with the other hand and stab or cut you with the main hand.
This is not a retreat, rather a move for my future!
>>344861081
What is the 1st line?
>>344853659
But the motion controls are the only instance where they were done right.
>>344844289
spies sappin my sentry
Why are we still here? Just to suffer? Every night, I can feel my leg... and my arm... even my fingers. The body I've lost... the comrades I've lost... won't stop hurting... It's like they're all still there. You feel it, too, don't you? I'm gonna make them give back our past.
>>344845137
>>344846640
Literally laughed like pic related. Goodjob.
You don't fix an entire firewall, you find a loophole and plug it
If you kill me you will be just as bad as me!
Hell, its about time
>>344847278
REDANIA'S GREATEST
C U C K
U
C
K
![[CAN'T WAKE UP].png](https://i.imgur.com/KrzzA5f.png "[CAN'T WAKE UP].png")
IT'S ALMOST HARVESTING SEASON
let's chew ass
-dunham or so
>>344849427
perfect
Nothing! I said nothing!
>>344844620
>not knowing kung-fu
t. weakling
I am Liquid's doppleganger, and you are his.
>>344844289
TOO LATE
>>344844289
ZUN HAAL VIIK!
I THINK YOU'LL ENJOY THIS....READY?
Whatever.
>You stand before Anon E. Moose, harbinger of vidya and holder of the Neckbeard asterisk! Come at me, I-I guess...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sk-9ihcy2R8
I should go.
>>344844289
Every NPC quote from the Manhunt 2, sexual deviants level comes to mind.
>>344844289
BANKAI
use your intellect, evade my blows
>>344844289
Step into the garden of madness!
>>344844289
I'll rip your head off and shit down your neck
>>344844620
Clap in front of his face as strong as you can, then punch his arm.
DOOR STUCK
>>344844289
>"A VISION"
MY DEFENSES
>>344844620
Shirahadori, bitch
HOW QUICKLY THE TIDE TURNS
YOU WOULDN'T DOWNLOAD A CAR...
>>344844289
"Bakana."
Just be friends.
>>344872671
YOU DODGED?
>>344873058
Is the chance for heroism at 100 stress fucking 5% or some shit? It's so small why even have the possibility
ZIMBZBWE
>>344844289
Our wisdom flows so sweet. Taste and see.
TRANSMIT - initiate moot signal - RECEIVE - initiate the shitposting frequency - UR WAIFU A SHIT - initiate trolling syntax - WITNESS - 4chan
>>344844289
Die monster! You don't belong in this world!
>>344844289
Ya' dead m8
*teleports behind neckbeard
NOTHING PERSONAL KID
*euphorically stabs in back
I must be the anonymous gangbanger of the 21st century.
https://youtu.be/7aIXwMc20TE?t=49
>>344844289
FEAR THE OLD BLOOD
Your health is low, do you have any potions? Or food?
>Only a fool trusts his life to a weapon!
We are all connected by something far greater. Memes. The DNA of the soul.
ANUU CHEEKI BREEKI IV DAMKE
(RADIO): Get out of there, it's gonna blow!
>>344844289
YOU'RE NOT ALEXANDER!
