Oh shit you found yourself a monkey paw, what do you wish for?
Keep it vidya related
i wish for FF15 to be released
I wish somebody would break into my house and beat me to death with a Gamecube
that donkey kong was my dad, if he was things would be different around here.
I wish my husbando would become real.
>>331537173
I wish for a new STALKER game!
I wish for sweet, sweet release from this horrid existence.
I WISH FOR A NEW PAPER MARIO GAME
>>331537173
I could get a license from Hasbro to make a MLP game.
>>331537173
I wish I could quickly and painlessly end my life
>>331537173
Only the strongest potions.
>>331537173
the full version of Battlefront 3
I would wish that Trump would win but since that's going to happen anyway... I wish that VR technology would advance 20 years overnight.
>>331537173
Man I want an Xbox!
>>331537253
Granted. But a bunch of Vita owners banded together and petitioned for a Vita port. The petition succeeded and the game had to be massively downscaled to play on a handheld device.
I wish I could enjoy video games again
>>331537173
for Legion to be the best WoW expansion ever released
>>331537173
Nothing, I chuck that shit into a fire.
No wish made on one of those damn things ever turns out well.
>>331537173
A board with a nail in it.
Vagrant Story II
I wish the NX won't be region-locked
>>331537173
I wish for one of those games where if you die in the game, you die in real life
>>331537505
>VR advances 20 years overnight
>none of our computers can run it
Wait to go faggot
>>331537253
>Done! But it is to be developed by EA.
>>331537370
>Done! But it is to be developed by EA.
>>331537436
>Done! But it is to be developed by EA.
>>331537478
>Done! But it is to be developed b- FUCK
>>331537173
how many in here would jerk themselves off with the hand?
>>331537363
Wish granted, too bad he belongs to someone else now and killing them would make him dissappear
>>331537505
Granted.
It turns out Trump was spewing bullshit for the republican vote and Trump's actually a bigger LibDem than Sanders.
>>331537363
Your husbando is now real...and wants nothing to do with an ugly NEET like yourself
>>331537683
See, I told you. I fuckin' told you!
Don't you dumb fucks know how this works?
The paw grants your wishes and then twists them to fuck you over.
I wish you would go away.
>>331537813
Done!but you're coming with me
>>331537630
Granted. The Super WiiU is region-locked though!
>>331537664
>implying in 20 years you'd need a computer to run a VR headset
>>331537746
Kill yourself and take your fake quote with you.
>>331537587
Granted, a new 4chan board is made and all that's on it is a picture of a nail on it
>>331537879
its a real quote anon
I wish for the ability to speed-run Crash Bandicoot Warped flawlessly
>>331537879
>>331537173
For companies to stop being greedy
i wish there were bere mere
>>331537173
I wish for the next TES game to have a satisfying story/worldbuilding.
>>331537953
Granted.
All copies of Crash Bandicoot Warped cease to function. Including digital copies.
>>331537746
>a quote from nearly 20 years ago
>implying people don't change
I voted for Obama twice and I'll never vote democrat again now. That's been less than 10 years.
>>331537630
Granted but NX games will only come out in Japan.
>>331537953
Granted. But you cause an annoying meme to be formed, making it impossible to talk about Crash Bandicoot from now on.
I wish for the means to support myself and my gf
>>331537953
Done!
But you can only do it while being assfucked.
>>331537971
DoneThe gaming industry dies overnight
>>331537173
I wish World of Warcraft was good again.
>>331537961
>>331537936
it's a fake quote, though he did say the republicans were gullible
>>331537905
Fuck off
/nail/ is best board
>>331538052
Granted, there are now wooden planks physically supporting you two so you don't fall over.
>>331538052
Granted, 2 crutches appear before you
Monkey Paw, I wish I had more Monkey Paws
>>331537173
I wish sega would sell the rights to the sonic franchise
>>331538005
>speedrun turns into not working
That's not how the paw works
>>331538031
>>331538075
These two on the other hand.
>>331537905
I'd post on /nail/, in fact I'd try and run their 4CC team.
>>331538052
Done!
But you can only do it while being assfucked.
>>331538075
AND FROM THE ASHES A NEW ONE WILL BE BORN
>>331538165
Granted.
Enjoy being a monkey.
I wish the hackers running rampant in Australian valve servers would all get permanently IP banned
>>331538052
Granted. You and your gf become a group Let's Play channel. It's all fun and games first, but your gf meets someone over the internet and eventually leaves you for him.
You eventually move on, but one day you reconnect with your ex gf and learn she wants you back. Because you truly love her, you take her back immediately, but it turns out she only wanted you back because she had a kid with the internet stranger and he split.
You now no longer have any time for video games and have to spend all your free time supporting a useless fuck-child.
>>331537173
Bring back Bullfrog.
>>331538269
fuck
>>331538234
>That's not how the paw works
Yes it is.
You have the ability to speedrun the game flawlessly. However, the game has been rendered permanently unplayable, so your ability has bee rendered useless.
>>331538273
Is it weird that this does nothing for me because I'm already cucking my gf's current boyfriend
I wish they would come out with another ogre battle game, maybe in the style of Ogre battle 64 with army building.
>>331538197
Granted, they sell it to Konami, who then make quite a bit of money on the NEW! SONIC PACHINKO!
>>331538272
Granted. But the guys who are in charge of IP banning hackers gets super paranoid and starts permanently banning anyone in Australia with no form of appeal.
>>331537363
Granted but his dick is really tiny, his ass is unenjoyably loose and his blow jobs are pure teeth.
>>331538272
Granted
Valve bans Australia
>>331538349
Ah, okay you're right.
>>331538273
This one just kind of hurts tbqh
>>331538272
Granted, Australian and Brazilian servers are merged together however.
>>331538334
Granted, but they're owned by EA, so they produce nothing but mobile shit.
>>331538384
You're a god among men, anon.
>>331538396
>blow jobs are pure teeth
anon you made my butthole clench.
>>331538393
>>331538420
WAIT NO
I want to become the fastest among my classmates.
>>331538384
>cucking my gf's current boyfriend
what did he mean by this?
>>331538505
Granted, you're also the fastest in bed.
>>331537173
I wish viewtiful joe 3 is made and it's considered by everyone to be the best in the series!
>>331537274
Can I use this one?
>>331538549
I mean I'm fucking her because her actual boyfriend is shit
>>331538505
You fall out of a jet mid sonic
>>331538505
Granted
A terrible accident in class puts you in a wheelchair for life and kills everyone else
>>331538563
Granted. You lose your hands
>>331538384
>cucking my gf's current boyfriend
You're cucking yourself?
I wish for a new hitman game to be made
>>331537173
I wish for a satisfying Pokemon roster in Pokemon Sun and Moon
Alternatively,
I wish mega evolutions would go away.
All I want is a WiiU and a copy of Braixen's Game
I wish for Freedom Fighters 2
>>331538586
But if she's your gf and you're fucking her boyfriend but she's dating and/or fucking someone else doesn't that mean that you're being cucked too?
>>331537792
>>developed by EA
>not by Ubisoft
EA maybe evil, but at least their games work
now Ubi on the other hand...
>>331538563
>>331538639
No, no, no. That's not a good enough ironic twist.
The wish is granted, however it sells so poorly Hideki Kamiya hangs himself in shame.
>>331538396
As long as I can cuddle andhold handsall day then I don't care.
>>331538691
>Those fucking legs
>>331538672
The pokemon with mega evolutions are removed from the series.
>>331538691
Both of them don't work.
>>331538672
granted, but the new pokemon have terrible stats overall and mega evolutions are replaced with rhythm-based trainer/pokemon fusion fights
>>331538745
meant to quote >>331537683
I wish ISIS would capture Anita
>>331538818
>mega evolutions are replaced with rhythm-based trainer/pokemon fusion fights
I don't think you get how this works. The side-effect is supposed to be a bad thing.
>>331538818
>Mega evolutions replaced with rhythm-based trainer/pokemon fusion fights
>>331538826
Granted, Anita convinces them gamers are the true enemy and now isis is on a quest to kill all games and gamers
I wish Nanako had stayed dead instead of being revived by Deus Ex Teddie
>>331538818
>terrible stats overall
desu I can live with this
>rhythm-based trainer/pokemon fusion fights
That doesn't sound too bad either senpai
>>331538826
Granted.
She convert the ISIS to fight for he cause and succesful at fucking the game industry up.
>>331538742
You're losing me here
Are you implying that all three parties in a cucking relationship is getting cucked
>>331538505
Granted, all the people faster than you gets injured, making you the fastest one in the class.
>>331538826
Granted. Although Anita is eventually rescued alive, uses the experience to garner more sympathy and support, and eventually becomes President of the United States.
Final Fantasy 2-2
Try to make this one worse than it already is. I fucking dare you.
>>331538943
>ISIS declares war on gamers
>neet neckbeards fight back and actually get something done for once
>ISIS completely genocided in less than a week
not bad desu
>>331539017
Now this is hell
>>331538563
Granted. It's a sequel to Red Hot Rumble but they call it VJ3 to sell copies.
Everyone considers it the best of the series only out of desperation for a new Viewtiful Joe.
>>331538958
Okay but then Dojima kills himself and Protag ends up moving away, the game then ends without any answers.
Doom 3 and 4 never happened, instead Brutal Doom HD released around 2009
I wish someone would love me
>>331537173
I wish I had never discovered 4chan
>>331538672
Granted but the game is released on mobile and evolving your Pokémon is now micro pay.
I wish Todd Howard was not allowed to tell lies
>>331539082
>implying any neet neckband isn't a lazy fuck who will just complain online about isis fucking them over while waiting for someone else to do the job for them
>>331539002
It's just curious as to how you're calling her your girlfriend, but her boyfriend is still her boyfriend. Like are you the mistress in this, or is he?
>>331539187
Granted, but you're still a total fuckin' loser.
>>331538672
>I wish for a satisfying Pokemon roster in Pokemon Sun and Moon
Granted. All they do is make babies and evos for anything that isn't already full three-stage evolution family.
>I wish mega evolutions would go away.
Granted. Mega evos are now a permanent evolution.
>>331539187
Granted, you go back in time and become a 9gag brony. You never bother visiting 4chan
>>331539187
Granted, you discover7chan instead
>>331539182
Granted_________________________
>>331539187
Granted, you discover reddit instead, nothing else changes
>>331539219
I showed up second
I wish I was good at fighting games
>>331539215
Granted but now everything he says comes true but he never says anything good anymore.
i wish for bernie sanders to become president
>>331539268
I thought wishes from monkeys paws were supposed to end up bad
>>331539182
Granted.But you don't love them back. No matter how hard you try to reciprocate feelings for them.
>>331539330
Granted. You are extremely talented at fighting games but you really don't like playing them
>>331539308
That's fair then desu
Unless you like her and she won't leave him, then you're still a cuck
>>331539330
Wish granted!
You lose your arms entirely but can play with your feet
>>331539215
Granted.
Todd Howard the basketball coach is no longer capable of telling lies.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Todd_Howard_(basketball)
>>331539215
Granted, all the other game developers are moved by Todds honesty and tell the truth about their games as well, too bad this causes sales for all games to drop to abysmal levels and crash the market
>>331539182
Granted. You hate that person though.
>>331539350
Granted but then Bernie Sanders becomes president.
>>331539412
fine by meI'm losing my limbs anyway
>>331539350
Granted
>Hillary is his VP
>he dies after the first month in office
>>331539330
granted. but you become a negro
>>331537173
I wish I were dead
>>331539350
Granted.
24 hours after being sworn in, he is assassinated by an disgruntled Trump supporter.
>>331537173
Monkey's Paw always has an ironic consequence fuck that
I'd rather find a genie and then map out an extremely specific contract on paper with him on the wording of my wish, to avoid any comical twists
>>331539436
Kek
>>331539350
Granted, his political plans run the nation into the ground though and we taken over by Mexico and China.
I wish Bonus Stage was back.
>>331538751l-lewd...
>>331539513
Granted.
You have eczema.
>>331539350
Granted, he berns america down to the ground.
>>331539582
Done.
I wish mobas would die off and give rise to a new rts era
I wish the next Tales did not have Hideo Baba working on it and it had Vesperia's combat system.
>>331539589
That didn't even ironically grant my wish
>>331537173
I wish I was dead
>>331539686
You have dead skin all over your body.
>>331539513
Granted but you're brought back with a defibrillator after being declared legally dead.
I want Dragon's Dgoma 2!
I want FF7 HD!
I want a MH game on PC!
I wish Square Enix would bring back Xenogears!any other Monkey's Paw wishes that I'm missing that actually happened?
>>331539670
Granted
All major RTS games are developed and influenced by SJW. Most popular game is about minorities taking over the white world.
I wish for the console market to suddenly crash, and for there to never be a new game released for a console ever again.
>>331539582
holy fuck it's been years. i bet /v/'s too young to remember it and high score.
I wish Onimusha received an HD collection for PC and PS4.
>>331539528
>Dosnt know the djinn, the actual geines are incredible assholes and fuck up wishes on purpose to make you use up wishes to reverse them, breaking them out of servitude faster.
Remember kids: Useing the the word "and" or "also" in any form of your wish counts as another wish!
>>331539736
Granted, you're given immortality but you constantly feel dead inside
I wish I had Bobsplosion's TF2 backpack
>>331539749
That's really stretching it, even for a monkeys paw wish
>>331537173
i wish that whatever monkey who's looking for it doesn't try to rape me once he tracks it down
>>331539790
Granted but nobody wants high end computers so everything goes to mobile gaming that requires a fb account.
>>331539528
>I'd rather find a genie
Not gonna get much better results, champ.
Genies, or rather djinn, don't grant wishes out of the goodness of their heart. They're spirits enslaved by sorcerers and they do not like being forced to serve mortals.
Disregard everything Disney told you about genies. The genie is not your big friend, he isn't going to do celebrity impersonations for you, and he will actively take any change he can get to fuck you over.
I wish I was a Saiyan.
>>331539847
close enough
>>331539736
Granted you are now dead, but now you've always been dead and your existence is completely wiped out.
>>331539790
Granted.
Devs now focus on making games for smartphones and handheld devices.
>>331539790
Granted but every game starting now and any rerelease will be developed with a 1000$ budget and look garbage
>>331539902
Granted but you get incurable polio.
>>331539513
Granted.
For using your wish to end your own life, your soul is damned to Hell.
>>331539908
That's pretty much how being dead works anyways
>>331539670
Granted, Overwatch will reign superior next few years in the competitive scene, only to yield to Sports e-sports games soon after
>>331539893
>he will actively take any change
*chance
Goddamn typos.
I wish to be the third member of Daft Punk and have the sickest fucking helmet.
>>331539893
That's why I write out my wish and force him to sign it and have it written in such a way that if I speak it verbally, it'll all count as one wish and any mean tricks he could add would have some kind of clause or fallback rolled into the overall wish to lessen those consequences.
I've spent a lot of time thinking about this, honestly.
>>331539975
Jokes on you, if hell existed I'd be going there regardless
I wish all e-celeb threads would forever disappear from /v/.
>>331539867
Fine then.
Your heart stops long enough for you to be considered legally dead, but you're revived by some doctors and you don't suffer any brain damage.
>>331539763
>Dragon's Dogma 2
It's an MMO
>FF7 HD
They break it up into multiple parts to squeeze every dime out of you
>Monster Hunter PC
They setup an IP block so you're fucked if you don't live in Japan, Korea, or China
>More Xenogears
They bring it back as an open world RPG that removes most of the philosophy for brain dead characters and a plot that's still only half-finished
Good thing none of those actually happened.
I wish for SMT's Strange Journey 2: In Space to exist immediately
I wish for a great game to be released tomorrow.
>>331539398
this desu senpai.
If you are fwb or just fucking her, it's whatever, but if you call her your g/f but she wont leave her original bf, both of you are kind of getting cucked.
>>331540069
Granted your helmet is filled with horrible diseases and you die.
>>331540069
The helmet is literally made of various diseases and you die painfully two months later.
>>331539963
You're supposed to give it an ironic twist.
>>331539902
Granted. You are now one of the random low-class Saiyans living on planet Vegeta on the day Frieza destroyed the planet.
And no, you don't retain any of your prior self's memories, so you can't suddenly know what's about to happen and bail.
>>331540069
granted, the helmet causes you to constantly vomit when you wear it
>>331540140
Granted, its made for a console that will never exist
>>331540134
Granted but Mastema isn't in it.
>>331540105
Yeah, that's a bit better
>>331540134
It becomes a F2P Puzzle & Dragons clone on mobile.
>>331540183
>>331540172
>>331540168
I wish that /v/ wouldn't talk to me or my son ever again.
>>331537173
I wish for:
- a shooting star
- a genie lamp
- a wishbone
- a wishing well
>>331540071
give me an example. also, you assume he follows your mortal code of "its illegal to go against a signed contract". Have you thought about the signing of the contract to be taken as a wish from him? Youd probably have to do something along the lines of "I wish for you to follow this contract pertaining to my next 2 wishes."
>>331540328
Granted.
The shooting star melts in the atmosphere.
You just get a lamp that had a genie in it at one point.
The wishbone is already broken.
A boy died in the well and his evil spirit prevents any wishes from being granted.
I wish for the fun to come back to GDQ.
>>331540173
People don't want to be sayain just to turn their hair color different as a parlor trick.
>>331539218
>what is the entirety of /k/
>>331540134
Granted, but it's a shitty high school vn
>>331540071
>I've spent a lot of time thinking about this, honestly.
That's cute.
The genie's had millenia to think up ways he can fuck over anyone who summons him.
>>331540328
A well appears before you, after looking in a star comes out and shoots you with a gun that fires wishbones it then rubs a genies lamp nearby and wishes you never existed
>>331540069
Granted, electronic music becomes obsolete within the next week, dark punk go bankrupt
I wish for another chimpout, the biggest yet.
>>331538672
Granted but now the game is a phone app with microtransactions up the ass. and mega evolution is gone along with all evolution.
>>331540623
Granted everyone blames you for it
>>331538267
I wish for and industry where the vidya changes to suit the individual, and not the other way around.
>>331539187
YOU NEVER DISCOVERED 4CHAN, BUT YOU BECOME A MASSIVE REDDITOR FEDORA TIPPER INSTEAD
I wish I knew who let the dogs out.
>>331540623
Chimps everywhere in the world escape from their Zoos and start fucking shit up. All races work together in order to stop it, achieving world peace forever in the process.
I wish for my husbando to survive healthy and happy in the next game he's in.
>>331540081
Yeah, but now you're going to the part of hell where they punish people for suicide.
Which is also the part of hell where they punish people for murder and rape.
I wish for white nights to stop giving a shit about the lack of girls playing video games and acting like it's a problem
>>331540328
The shooting star is in another galaxy
The wish bone is now your femur
The genies lamp falls apart into rust and dust when you rub it
The wishing well is dry
i wish my husband survives his military term healthy and completely intact and that no negative or unintended effects can come from this wish
>>331537173
Any type of vidya outfit/costume/attire to fit, can be just one part or the whole thing
GO
RUIN IT FOR ME
>>331540134
Granted, it sells like shit and Atlus goes bankrupt.
>>331540818
Granted now it's black "nights" complaining about the lack of girls and acting like it's a problem
>>331540803
>implying anything changes
Smh desu senpai
I wish for all frogposters to die.
>>331540731
You discover who did it
it was a nigger I'm afraid
>>331540069
Granted. However, the new three-man Daft Punk is universally reviled and people much prefer it before you joined.
>>331540894
that doesn't even make any fucking sense
what retard programmed this fucking paw
>>331540859
Granted but he comes back gay and Muslim.
>>331540859
Granted, you get a letter saying he found someone else while on duty
>>331540865
The monkey paw explodes trying to comprehend what the fuck you just said
You have beaten the monkey paw but don't get your wish
>>331540916
Granted
but you die alongside them you fagatron
>>331540623
Granted but it happens in your neighborhood.
>>331537173
Pokemon world becomes real.
>>331540750
That's..damn, took a bad time to become a mercenary
I wish to know what happened to the monkey that used to be attached to this paw.
>>331541085
Done. You get the role of a one-line NPC who will never leave your home town for an adventure.
Microsoft have already done it - I wanted Forza on PC for so long, and now it's coming as part of the UWP and is W10 only, heavily locked down so no modding or optimisation using nvidia inspector, rivatuner or anything else.
>>331541047
I'd happily sacrifice my life to rid the world of all frogshitters.
>>331540859
Granted but he opens a gay bar the next day.
>>331541085
Granted
But you have to fight in the world war that makes it post apocalyptic
>>331541085
Granted, its at the other end of the universe and you die before humans have the technology to visit it
I'd make a wish, but apparently someone beat me to it years ago.
I wish we could talk about Super Mario 64 again without any of those Le Parallel Universe neo-memers sperging all over the place.
>>331537456
Granted.
You become the greatest terrorist mankind has ever known.
>>331540916
Granted. The "Forever Alone" guy comes back from the dead and takes Pepe's place.
>>331540859
Granted. He comes home healthy and intant, with no negative or unintended effects.
However a week after he comes home, he meets someone else and divorces you.
i wish the dragon balls were real and existed on earth
>>331541286
Granted, 8 dragon testicles are strewn about the world for people to find
>>331540323
Granted but /v/ kills the two of you silently
>>331541196
Not so bad desu, the husband sets up a profitable business
>>331541286
Granted.
But they appear in the most remote areas of the planet, and there's no Dragon Radar, so it will take decades at the least to find them.
>>331541386
Ex husband*
>>331541286
Granted, a pair of dragon testicles comes crashing down on your body
