Adventure Thing, part 10
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Oh shit nigger, you're a Barbarian.
You're currently inside the Imperial Dungeon's visitor area, waiting for the guards to bring out your Barbarian Dad.
What do you do?
Previous threads:
http://pastebin.com/sR3G3F2A
https://www.mediafire.com/folder/ici3zlnn9ytyy/ADVENTURES
>>318366875
invent a sick dance move
>>318366875
Punch self in face
>>318366875
rest
>>318366875
Punch self in face
jump into the void
>>318366945
Barbarians are sadly not know for their dancing prowess. Your sick dance move involves flailing your arms widly while your feet do something weird
>>318366875
Punch self in face
eat helmet
>>318367192
Vibrate through the wall, and punch yo face.
>>318367310
You vibrate and punch yourself in the face.
You are not radical enough to vibrate through walls
>>318366875
seduce one of the guards into giving you their keys
>>318367439
The guards show up with your dad
>>318367439
Ask for a taco
>>318367567
"Ah, my son! How nice of you to visit"
>>318367784
free him
>>318367784
spit in his face
>>318367869
"Freeing prisoners is illegal!"
Oh shit it's a guard
>>318368067
punch him in the face to assert dominance
>>318368067
Well too late, do slick combo moves with your now-free dad and beat guard up
>>318368067
Jizz on him
>>318368067
reunite mom annd dad instead
>>318368167
He blocks your punch
>>318368350
Burning finger activated
>>318368389
"This is nothing! Your puny fire can't harm me"
>>318368591
power up.
>>318368591
Drop kick the guard.
>>318368591
insult his armour and the way his voice sounds.
>>318368591
didn't we upgraded the hell out of that skill?
>>318368649
>>318368701
Yes but The king's dungeon is populated by high level guards
>>318368879
Reunite ghost mom and living dad instead
>>318368879
Activate your Trans Dimensional Barrier
>>318368879
trick them with your mighty intellect
>>318369304
Suplex guard
>>318369304
dog appears
>>318369479
Damnit, he's too heavy
>>318369685
ATATATATATATATATATATATA
>>318369685
Use the eye sun beam!
>>318369685
squeeze him
>>318369685
smile
>>318369685
what dad in jail for anyways bahaha
>>318369785
"Fuck! Close the windows!"
THe windows are now closed, you can't use the power of the sun if you can't see it
>>318370081
insult the guard's poor fashion sense
>>318370081
Call his mom mean things!
GO DENNIS
>>318370081
suk gurd dik
>>318370108
check my 9 cunt
>>318370081
Say he will be sued for police brutality!
>>318366875
fuck off to /tg/
i can't report you, i can't sage you, but i still can flick you and assfuck your mom. You OP, and everyone participating in this stupid thread !
>>318370108
"Says the guy who walks around half naked in a loincloth"
>>318370296
ask god for your own personal sun
>>318370296
Have fun being black now
>>318370296
How dare he insult the mighty barbarian fashion! Insult him for his lack of manliness for hiding in armor!
>>318370276
why the fuck does it bother you
a million shitty threads and you whine about OC?
>>318370296
Why was he looking at your loin cloth!?
>>318370276the only good thread in /v/ and you come to shit post. Just where do you get off.
>>318370407
"I maybe black on the outside but I'm still white on the inside"
>>318370508
Unlike your mom.
>>318370296
Vibrate your fist into his face
>>318370276
NotAPaladin is the last best /v/ thread
It'll never be like these again
>>318370508
punch so hard the reality bends around the fist
>>318370508
Eat your secret power up pack you hide in your cloth.
Show him his insides.
>>318370508
call him out for supporting the patriarchy by being white
>>318370508
Call him a race traitor
>>318370276
The autism is strong in this one.
>>318370607
Luckily you hid your secret Barbarian lunch under your loincloth all this time.
It powers you up
>>318370815
Offer the guard some of your secret meat.
>>318370815
with the incredible power of lunch, trip the guard
>>318370815
go super saiya- I mean super barbarian
>>318370815
Run away from the fight
>>318370815
Fire fist becomes sun fist
>>318371089
kick him while he's down
>>318371089
rip out his spine!
>>318371089
body slam
>>318371089
Tell him a REALLY scary story.
>>318371157
"Don't touch me, filthy barbarian scum" then he kicks you
>>318371354
smile back! shill your toothpaste!
>>318371354
now! hold his leg and twist the fuck out of it
making him unable to walk
>>318371354
Show him the sick dancemove
>>318371713
taunt him
>>318371892
smile at him
>>318371713
Call him out on shaming you for being a barbarian. That was rude.
>>318371892
use a finishing move
>>318371892
kick his dick
>>318371892
rescue your dad now
>>318371892
Pull off his helmet!
>>318371978
"Thanks son. Now get the key to these cuffs from him"
>>318372224
keys are for pussies
break the cuff's lock with your BARE HANDS
>>318372224
who needs keys when you have fists?
>>318372224
Feed your dad some lunch to break the cuffs.
>>318372339
You punch the lock. What the shit, that hurts.
"Yeah, the damn thing's magic. Designed to sap away the strength of a barbarian. If it was a normal lock I would broken myself out already"
>>318372668
cast a spell to destroy the lock
>>318372668
Pause. Swap class to magician.
>>318372668
we need a wizard
>>318372668
Ask the guard politely for the key.
>>318372668
Preform the barbarian screech of wizard summoning
>>318372747
Luckily you do have a wizard in your party.
"Unfortunately, I'm a lightning and thunder wizard, not a Lock Wizard. I'm not sure if shooting lightning bolts at the lock would help"
>>318372946
try anyway
>>318372946
uh
why don't we just use a key then
>>318372946
use your teeth and shill toothpaste
>>318372946
try hitting the cuff and not the lock
>>318372946
Apologize to the guard.
And ask nicely for a key
Urinate on loincloth and use tensile strength to break cuffs
>>318372946
slap round the face to establish dominance, and then tell him to zap that fucking lock
>>318373009
You puch the cuffs. Youch, it hurts less than punching the lock but it still hurts.
"I told you son, magical shit designed to pacify barbarians"
>>318373312
Go on quest to become a wizard blacksmith to forge the key.
>>318373312
Shut up! You're not my real dad!
Run off crying
>>318373312
Ask the paladin to do it
>>318373312
okay fine search guard for the key
search thoroughly
>>318373312
Use guard to break the cuffs.
Technically he's not barbarian, or is he?
>>318373312
Good thing your awesome teeth can destroy lock with single chew
>>318373312
Cast spell to shrink Dad's hands.
>>318373417
"You're not smacking him against the cuffs hard enough, do it again"
"Or you could just use his key" said ghostmom
>>318373758
use key
then break the cuffs anyway
>>318373758
Use ghost mom ectoplasm to butter up your dad's hands.
>>318373758
chew on key and use your teeth to break cuffs
>>318373758
Put the key in backwards. We've got low Int so it'll probably work that way.
>>318373758
the key is too heavy
>>318374046
now pull
>>318374046
Charisma check asking the guard for the key.
>>318374046
SHILL. YOUR. TOOTHPASTE.
>>318373758
Magic days I can't use key
>>318374046
Harder
>>318374118
"Ah screw you savages. Just wait until my HP regen kicks in. My leg'll heal and I'll kick your ass!"
>>318374242
Use his regen to pick the lock
>>318374242
Go on quest to raise charisma. We can't defeat this lock.
>>318374242
have the paladin use skill disable on the guards hp regen
>>318374309
BUT WE HAVE MAGICAL TEETH
WHY YOU RUIN EVERYTHING
>>318374242
Have sex with the lock>>318374242
>>318374410teeth can't melt steel beams friend
>>318374309
"Do not despair so quick, divine wisdom will surely help us! O lord! how do we pick this lock?" yelled the cleric
"Have you tried punching it?" said God
>>318374498
Punch the lock.
Now that you have been divinely blessed sure it will work.
>>318374480
Dude, you don't understand.
That tooth paste is basically plot solution to everything. In exchange for shilling
>>318374498
he recommends using toothpaste
>>318374498
ask gladiator to break it
>>318374498
God has blessed our fists, we temporarily have Paladin power.
Punch the lock
>>318374498
Ask God for lock picking + 1 gloves.
>>318374498
Vibrate the lock
>>318374595I understand but its more fun to waste rolls to push side plot. It took 20 rolls one night to open a door.
>>318374617
"Ah thank you"
Luckily the Gladiator wasn't secretly a barbarian that is actually your long lost brother or something
>>318374828
It was a very complicated door
>>318374897
Take your dad out for Mongolian.
>>318374897
Well that would've just been silly.
Leave the prison as discretely as you can.
>>318374828Let's have a sidequest centered about obtaining more of toothpaste.
>>318374897
guard reinforcements arrivewith your love interest
>>318374897
Vibrate some more and your party
>>318374897
have a real tearful reunion
>>318374979
"Oh no! It's the guards! Quickly son, we must escape! THere might be guards of the opposite gender in theere!"
>>318375153
look for bikini armoured guard instead of escaping
>>318375153
Quietly walk out the front door as if nothing happened.
>>318375153
wait for guards of opposite gender, then tear off her chestpiece
>>318375153
*A female guard teleports behind you*
Nothing personal
>>318375153
Take entire party and Vibrate through the bars. Bars aren't walls you see they are less radical.
>>318375153
punch a hole in the wall, it's the only way out
>>318375153
Dig a tunnel to forest village.
>>318375239
Trying to act cool while walking past the guards
>>318375432
throw spaghetti at guard right as you leave
>>318375432
>try
we don't need to try nigga
>>318375432
suddenly explosion
>>318375432
Vibrate at the gaurd, it's your warning signal
>>318375432
snap guards neck
>>318375432
Blame fart on guard. Leave while he argues his case.
>>318375680
Sorry, farted a bit too loud, I'll see myself out.
>>318375680
apologize for eating tacos before trying to break in
>>318375680
Tell the paladin that the guard is a heretic
>>318375778
"Hey buddy, you're a heretic, aren't ya?"
"What"
"You know that heretics get purged right?"
"What"
>>318375986
Leave, having successfully broke your dad out of jail.
>>318375986
Take your party to the village. We need supplies.
>>318375986
"what" is a sign of ignrance, therefore, he must be a heretic!
>>318375986
[Purging intestifies]
>>318376128
>>318375986
PURGE HIM
>>318376128
[Holy Necksnap]
>>318376283
Tell Paladin that all the guards here are heretics, then run away.
>>318376283
Leave before you purge the whole castle.
>>318376283
Guard complains
>>318376283
Loot guard then leave
>>318376283
Human resources manager witnesses you.
>>318376349
>>318376351
I couldn't prevent the purging..
>>318376283
Oh shit, turns out the guard was actually a cleverly disguised bomb!
>>318376349
The Paladin tells you that's a good idea, you can leave while he stays behind to purge the heretics.
[purging]
"Aha! A female heretic! You shall also be purged!"
[purging intensifies]
>>318376614
Cry at loss of possible love interest
>>318376614
That turned out better than expected, I didn't even have to fight a cootie infested girl!
>>318376614
Eat Popcorn with Dad
>>318376614
The power of the purging attracts the attention of nearby dark clerics.
>>318376614
OH SHIT AN ORC
>>318376759
they get purged too
>>318370552
Oh snap
>>318376679
"Don't be sad son. Empire women are too high maintenance anyway. It's always "why don't you do anything", "why do you always lay on the couch", "when are you gonna get a job", blah blah blah. THat's why I married your mother instead"
>>318376959
Wasn't that exactly what my mother did to you
>>318376959
Let's go to the nearest tavern to find a wench.
>>318376959
OH SHIT SUDDEN FILLER ARC!
>>318376959
God tells you to man the fuck up
>>318376959
let your dad tell your friends stories about your youth
>>318377019
"Hey you down there! Man the fuck up! You're on part 10 already! You don't want this to end anticlimatically do you?"
>>318377160
Two filler arcs flank in from the east and west! Kill them before they get too close!
>>318377160
show middle finger to god
>>318377160
Ask God and the cleric to revive her! We can't lose this sub-plot filler!
>>318377160
We should probably find and kill the King sometime soon.
But first, tavern wench.
>>318377217
"wow rude"
>>318377160
Tell paladin that that sounds heretical to you.
>>318377160
ask God what we were even supposed to do before saving dad
>>318377160
whoa dad
you are really big
>>318377217
"rude"
>>318377268
"Hey Pally, there's a weird lookin guy on a cloud out here, saying something about heresy."
>>318377241
>>318377321
It's important! The king can wait for chapter 18!
>>318377321
Accuse of being heretic
>>318377321
set finger on fire
>>318377321
MEANWHILE IN THE KING'S CASTLE
>>318377367
"Yes, but...Is this Golden Female Guard yours?! Or is this this Silver one?"
>>318377634
toss a coin
>>318377634
Silver, probably won't be as expensive to take care of.
>>318377634
The third one that you're hiding!
>>318377634
the silver one
>>318377634
Both
>>318377634
Gold
>>318377634
Golden redhead please.
>>318377719
YES
>>318377719
"You are dishonest. You get a pillow with the female guard printed on it"
>>318377916
Check inside pillow for love interest
>>318377916
Ask for less clothed female knight print pillow.
>>318377916
Wear the pillow
>>318377916
come on God, we didn't even see her before Paladin over there purged her, at least give us a choice!
>>318377916
That's heresy
>>318377951
YOu find...cotton.
>>318378137
go back to your barbarian buddy who's training the little barbies
>>318378137
Nega Todd reappears and offers a new tonic that turns cotton into people!
>>318378042
We did, in the last part.
>>318378194
>nega todd
>touching the potion turns you into cotton
>adventure ends
*sweating*
>>318378137
We shout to paladin that there's a god impersonator out here.
>>318378137
Todd appears to give you a deal on your guard waifu
>>318378137
Wizard ? Is the cotton magic ?
>>318378137two left hands... What does this mean senpai?
>>318378316
One's from the printed guardfu.
>>318378184
You return to Chad and the secret barbarian camp
"Ah greetings! The training for the children is going well"
>>318378435
Show off your cool pillow
>>318378435
Are there any cute Barbarian women left?
>>318378435
Request to spar the most promising one
>>318378435
Trade pillow for Chad's hot wife.
>>318378435
rub horns for genie
>>318378497
"Perfect! Lil' Punchy will spar with you"
>>318378654
FIELD-GOAL STYLE FOOTBALL KICK
>>318378654
kick him without holding back
>>318378654
Capitalize on your unfair horn advantage by goring him.
>>318378654
Accuse of heresy
>>318378654
go for a footbal tackle
>>318378654
throw pillow as a pokemon
>>318378654
Punch yourself in face to increase rage levels.
>>318378749
"Is it true child? Are you a heretic?"
"Nuh uh, he is!"
"Thank you for your cooperation. So Barbarian! You were the heretic all along!"
>>318378859
ask paladin where his body is
>>318378859
Of course not, the kid doesn't even know what a heretic is.
>>318378859
Tell him only heretics try and turn the accusation back on the accuser
>>318378859
Equip pillow of purge resistance.
>>318378859
"it was a test to see if he was a heretic, only you can detect true hereticism"
>>318378859
" Naw pally bro, what he meant was the dickass thief that's standing behind me trying to steal my toothpaste "
>>318378859
No but I saw this guy on a cloud a while back that impersonated god. Claimed he'd revive my love interest, then gave me this stupid pillow instead.
Thanks for purging my love interest by the way, you jerk.
>>318378889
"Yea I do! It means smelly poopy head, like you"
>>318379071
glare
>>318379071
Tell the pally bro that you got this.
Then burning finger that little barbarian cunt.
>>318379071
WHO ARE YOU CALLING A SMELLY POOPY HEAD?!
>>318379071
Spit on him and kick him in the dick
>>318379071
let's jump
>>318379109
At which point the boy delivers a flying kick right into your balls
>>318379341
Cry to God for help
>>318379341
Use your testicles to trap his foot & hold him in place.
Burning finger him into next tuesday.
>>318379341
good thing the loincloth was reinforced with STEEL
>>318379341
Ask the cleric to massage your balls to heal them.
>>318379341
grip his foot with your balls and dont let go
>>318379417
>>318379405
what the fuck is wrong with you guys
how
>>318379386
What are we, a paladin?
>>318379409
Implying that'll make a difference.
>>318379409
"Yeah but breaking steel with your limbs is one of the most basic of all barbarian training, c'mon man you did the same thing when you were a kid"
Chad's words ring true as your balls take critical damage
>>318379595
That's enough sparring for today.
>>318379595
crush child between thighs
>>318379414
>>318379595
Critical heals.
>>318379595
congratulate the child
>>318379595
Return the favor with your burning finger, registered sex offenders list be damned.
>>318379595
Steal chads helmet. It looks cool.
>>318379638
"Right, come along now, Punchy. We're having steaks for dinner"
"woohoo"
>>318379914
level up punchy
>>318379914
Walk it off like it aint nothin.
>>318379914
Ask why did Punchy kicked your balls instead of punching them
>>318379914
Ask wizard to turn you into cutie female for less weakness to dick punch.
>>318379914
Try finding a barbarian woman.
>>318379914
barbarian yell
>>318379595
The demon of gets suddenly appears and steals little punchy
>>318379914
Cry a tear of joy for how proud you are of that lil' annoying cunt.
>>318379945
"Ah that's good little buddy. You leveled up!"
"Yeah! Thanks to beating the smelly poopy head"
"Now now, say thank you to the nice man for sparring with you"
"Thank you, smelly poopy head"
>>318380150
But then something bad happens!
>>318380150
Gotta find some booze to soothe the pain, both physical and emotional.
>>318380150
Purge him.
>>318369304
So moe
>>318380208
"Purge who?"
>>318380413
THOSE TREES
>>318380413
Purge the gladiator
>>318379071
OOOOOH SNAP
>>318380413
Pause. Check stats and gear please.
>>318380413
beware assassins behind trees
>>318380459
Gladiator sez:
"Nah man, I'm no heretic, I pray to god to bless my arena fights all the time"
"It's true, he also like to offer his bread as an...offering"
"Aww, why don't you ever bless my fights?" asked the paladin
"It's not good to coddle your children"
>>318380695
Apparently god has been infected with heresy. You know what must be done!
>>318380695
Ask paladim to purge heretic king and bring back cutie princess.
>>318380695
ride gods cloud
>>318380695
Is God a heretic though?
>>318380695
Ask god for newloincltoh. Made of fire
>>318380747
"O lord, are you a heretic"
"No"
"Works for me, mystery solved. Let's go get dinner"
>>318380850
>>318380756
We have to finish this before we get into more filler.>>318380812
>>318380850
Hunt for wild mantacore. Tonight we feast!
>>318380850
Why dont the barbarian try and become a paladin in order to purge the king and bring back waifu?
>>318380850
Travel to fight heretic king
>>318380956
Ah yes, the mantacore. Body of a lion, tail of a scorpion and face of a...manta ray
>>318381180
bite it
>>318381180
Travel to the distant ocean to punch manticore.
>>318381180
Kiss it in the mouth
>>318381180
Stalk it from the tree tops, then tackle it!
>>318381180
Throw a rock at it
>>318381248
"Manticores are land creatures though" said a manticore
>>318381378
Tell the manticore to shut up and travel to the ocean anyway
>>318381378
Kiss both in the mouth
>>318381378
But there's a Mantacore in that pond behind you.
>>318381378
Travel to ocean to acquire manticore slayer + 1 spear.
>>318381378
Shut up and get in the ocean
>>318381378
Wait....are you a manticore?
>>318381428
wow what the fuck anon that's disgusting
>>318381428
"Oh shit this guy's a homo! We must escape!"
"Mantacore awayyyyy"
>>318381564
Wait, what part of you is Praying Mantis?
>>318381564
Having lost several potential love interests today, you now search the barbarian camp for another.
>>318381564
Tell paladin to purge them from the sky.
>>318381564
punch the air so hard it sends a sonic wave to shoot them down
>>318381564
Take them both down
>>318381564
Subclass in ranger so you can snipe them.
>>318381840
Why can't Mantacore be our friend?
We may need him someday. Offer alliance with him.
>>318381840
Evil heretic manti/manta cores defeated, lets head into town.
>>318381840
ask paladin why he's so much stronger than us
>>318381840
Kill and eat, save the leftovers.
>>318381914
"Training and Faith"
>>318381992
Kiss paladin
>>318381992
Ask paladin to spare manticore if they will fly the party to kings castle.
>>318381992
Convert into a paladin
>>318381992
Level up
>>318381992
caress paladin
>>318382069
"Aw dang. I purged them too fast"
>>318382186
PUT THE PIECES BACK TOGETHER
or cry, that's easier
>>318382186
Time for Hitler to show up
>>318382186
Ask wizard to convert us to a fem paladin.
Ask wizard to summon a manticore to fly the party to kings castle
>>318382186
Ask God about that favor he owes you
>>318382369
blame paladin
>>318382369
Ask the paladin out
>>318382369
Try to remember what we need to do.
>>318382369
Resolve to avenge the manticore by taking down the heretic king
>>318382369
Ask wizard to revive manticore, frankenstein style
>>318382369
Take punchy with you and go to the king's castle
leave chad to train the other barbies
>>318382426
"whoops"
>>318382551
Punch Paladin in the nuts
>>318382369
Collect gibs, grill.
>>318382551
time for some genocide
>>318382568
KLANK!
"eh"
>>318382551
Become fem paladin.
Anything but this.>>318382568
>>318382705
meanwhile in the king's castle
>>318382705
Punch Harder........ MUCH HARDER
>>318382726
"Oh man it's so great having all these female guards around and not have them be love interests to some random shmuck"
>>318382984
SHUT UP BROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOTHER
>>318382984
Time to challenge the King to a duel for his females.
>>318382984
it's good to be king
>>318382984
dick ass thief steals his spotlight
>>318382984
Punch the king's nuts.
>>318383018
"Don't underestimate him son. I did and he kicked my ass and put me in a dungeon"
>>318383152
Kiss dad
>>318383152
challenge your dad to a duel
>>318383152
Do side quests to level up
>>318383152
We can beat him, we have Paladin on our side.
>>318383152
We need some macguffin that will make us strong enough to challenge the King.
>>318383152
Ask cleric to buff paladin while he purges king.
>>318383175
"Ah, so you wish to test yourself against your old man eh? C'mon then, show me what you got"
>>318383338
crane stance
>>318383338
suplex him
>>318383338
bite him in the balls
>>318383338
Punch his punch
only manly way to fight
>>318383338
Have paladin purge him. We have bigger fish to fry.
>>318383338
hug
>>318383338
punch moustache
>>318383398
He pats your head.
Which was actually a grab move and stopped you in your tracks
>>318383564
bolder bash him
>>318383564
counter grab on his balls
>>318383564
push on
>>318383564
Use your dad's tracks then .
>>318383564
Snap his arm
>>318383616
Not working
>>318383725
Use a distraction
>>318383725
punch him in the side near the kidney
>>318383725
heabutt the hand
>>318383725
Act like you want to kiss him but...
SECRETLY ATTACK HIM WITH YOUR LIPS
>>318383769
That probably hurt your ehad more than it did his hand
>>318383972
handbutt his head
>>318383972
"C'mon dad, be a tad more lenient."
>>318383972
"You can't even beat your own mother"
>>318383972
Ask for unfair advantage
>>318384089
"Sure. I'll won't use my hands"
>>318384228
kiss him on the lips and use a little tongue
>>318384228
Headbutt his balls
>>318384228
Do the winky dink maneuver
>>318384228
Piledrive him
>>318384228
Burning Finger
>>318384228
Stun him with your sick dance move
>>318384325
His balls...they're too strong
>>318384263
Why you gotta be so gay, man
>>318384424
Trip him
>>318384424
Burning Finger his gut
>>318384424
Use the gladiator as a throwing weapon
>>318384424
Tell him his son is a disappointment
>>318384519
He used his foot to block
>>318384794
Barbarian rage + burning finger = ?
>>318384794
stop this madness! we go to the gym now for the next 10 years and become a huge ripped even stronger beast! the children will be ready too by then
>>318384794
pretend to be hurt and then sweep the leg
>>318384794
Try to distract him by telling him gladiator and paladin are kissing behind him.
Then try to swap hats while hes not looking.
The hat must be his source of power
>>318384794
Evolve Burning Finger to Erupting Burning Finger
>>318384794
grab foot
throw
>>318384794
Go on the defensive.
>>318384228
Start crying and ask him why your mom had to die
>>318384839
10 years is a long time my friend are you sure? Unexpected things may happen in that time
>>318384996
no! steal fathers hat!
>>318384996
No.
10 days is enough. dad will help, yeah?
>>318385059
Good idea. Time skips never works in these damn adventures. If you did it'll probably turn out you died of AIDS in the 8th year or something.
>>318385217
Do a side quest. Let's get stronger
>>318385217
ask for a high five
>>318385217
Beat him in a challenge of CHARISMA
>>318385217
The spar is over get EXP.
Dad, don't be greedy!
>>318385248
You consider your choices
>>318385378
necromancer
>>318385378
Tell paladin that he has a skeleton inside him and skeletons are evil so he has heresy inside his body.
>>318385378
cave adventure!
>>318385378
fight the cave
>>318385378
Kill mythical necromancer in a cave
>>318385378
Defeat the Negromancer
>>318385378
Explore a Cave
>>318385427
"That's racist" said paladin
"Yeah!" said skeleton paladin
>>318385694
Kill Mythical Beast: The Mantacorp's Mecha-Mantacore Core must be destroyed, before the Manticores and Mantacores take revenge for their two fallen comrades!
>>318385694
Let's go fight the cave necromancer who is guarded by a mythical beast
>>318385694
Romance Skeleton paladin by complementing his calcium rich bones
>>318385694
Recruit skeleton paladin and go after necromancers
>>318385694
ask father to grab cookies off the top shelf for you.
little does he know the spar never ended and he just used his hand.
you win!
level up twice
>>318385694
cave explorer
as per 4chan interpretation.
>>318385738
And so you must now enter the necro cave to defeat the necromancer inside. Beware, he is protected by a mythical beast.
>>318385878
Call out the mythical beast by doubting its fighting power
>>318385878
It's a pretty big cave. Looks like we'll have to do some exploring
>>318385878
steal the sign
>>318385878
The mythical beast is just a normal cat.
>>318385878
Take a boombox and go inside Crypt of the Necrodancer-style.
>>318385878
look for a backdoor
>>318385878
Start a rap battle with the mythical beast
>>318385878
Is the Mythical Beast the Mantacorp's Mecha-Mantacore, whose Manticore Core must be destroyed?
>>318386025
Yell obscenities into the cave
>>318386025
write ''Negro Cave'' and draw a watermelon where the original sign was
>>318386025
put up a new sign making fun of the beast
>>318386025
Suddenly see two lights in the deep darkness of the cave
>>318386023
No, it's a mantiscore
>>318386025
Write on the sign "here a heratic" and put it back on
>>318386197
make the beast a >>318386127
>>318386197
Tell paladin that cave is full of heresy and needs to be purged.
>>318386197
paladin cant read your shitty hand writing
>>318386127
THE MANTACORPS MECHA-MANTACORE WHOSE MANTIS CORE MUST BE DESTROYED?
THAT SHIT IS DEFINITELY IN >>318386197 THAT CAVE
>>318386197
Go inside
>>318386286
Dear god, we're doomed
>>318386484
Set a trap for the beast using its favorite food and wait
>>318386484
this is getting too hard core, we need some nightcore
>>318386484
attack the core
>>318386484
Learn Tame Mech and tame that shit
or if it has pilots, just climb up in that bitch and steal it
>>318386484
Mate with the beast. It will let you tear off its head.
>>318386484
Challenge it to a game of Jeopardy
>>318386557
but it's the female who eats the males head
are we secretly a woman?
>>318386603
we could pretend to trick it
>>318386549
My god! The mantiscore's core has appeared in the form of a conveniently huge glowing weak point!
>>318386679
lick it
>>318386679
throw rocks at it
>>318386679
Tell him to cover up that big zit on his forehead. shit's disgusting
>>318386679
Call it heresy
>>318386679
STEAL IT AND EMPOWER YOURSELF
>>318386797
wat
>>318386759
Mantiscore is saddened by your words.
"IT'S PUBERTY, OKAY"
>>318386884
offer to help cover it up.
Then stab it with your hat
>>318386884
puberty is a hard time for us all
Befriend him
>>318386884
mock it some more/
>>318386884
apologize
hahahaha, what the fuck is this reddit shit
holy hell what happen to you /v/
my god
this shit is embarrassing
>>318387080
It's Fun.
>>318387184
Steal its lunch money
>>318387184
apoligize
>>318387184
Steal lunch money
>>318387184
While the manticore is saddened, employ the wizard to sever the manticores core from its skull using... Lightning magic
>>318387198
Its pathetic circle jerking reddit tier shit
It is damn near roleplaying
You know who else roleplays?
Furfags.
Good bye disgusting thread, hidden.
>>318387378
make out with it
>>318387378
Find the necromancer and ask if they can bring hitler back to life
>>318387378
Stroke it... Gently
>>318387080
We've had these kinds of threads for years faggot. They originated on /tg/
>>318387429
"Hitler hasn't even been born yet"
>>318387383
/tg/ started these threads years ago. Whets the circlejerking anyway? Op isn't tripfagging and must relays are just the next action.
>>318387383
Bye
>>318387718
ask why a skeleton is able to grow facial hair and if hes even a real skeleton
>>318387718
Tell necromancer to bring back the hitler of our times
>>318387718
Mantiscore joins your party
>>318387809
"Oh please. I don't work for free. NOw begone with you. I ahve important necromancer things to do"
>>318387912
mention under your breath so he can't hear you that you're borrowing his Mantiscorepermanently
and then quickly leave
>>318387912
come one, we just want Hitler
>>318387912
Offer him the life and soul of todd the peasant as payment
>>318387912
HERETIC
>>318387912
Mention his mustache is fake because he has no skin.
>>318387912
Kick him in the nuts
>>318388000
"Ah, very good. THanks for the soul. And the Trips"
>>318388165
begin the ritual
>>318388165
ask him why he capitalizes the first two letters of each second sentence
>>318388165
Now ask for a skeleton companion
>>318388165
>>318388291
Ask for skeleton hitler
>>318388165
The demon of gets appears. Pissed off that we stole his get.
>>318388165
Ask him to summon mecha hitler
>>318388478
The demon leaves again
>>318388478
punch his face off to reveal...
>>318388478
Pick up some dirt from the ground and throw it towards necromancers' face.
>>318388478
SAVE GAME
>>318388478
Ask the necromancer create hitler and infuse him with the power of six million Jews to defeat this demon
>>318388519
It's the King!
>>318388632
Steal his crown and run
>>318388632
DUN DUN DUUUN
>>318388632
Ask why is he here
