Hard Time
- Home
- Board: /v/ - Video Games
- Reading: Hard Time
What's the time? It's Hard Time
Meet Gaben, he's been arrested for fraud after refusing to release HL3 for years.
Lets see how long this fat, balding, middle aged manlet lasts in prison.
continue
Things get off to a good start when our hero is sent to prison for 32 days
MDickie will release his games for free before HL3 comes out
Turns out that he doesn't give a shit
>>272678105
The courtroom's pretty casual to let you in without a shirt
Looks like Gaben is on the East side
I hope you maxed intelligence in character creation.
>>272677791
>Southtown
Getting thrown into prison in a gang/mob run city gotta be some hard shit.
Luckily it looks like he might be able to make a new friend in his block
>>272678496
>Crazy Jew
>>272678496
>Crazy Jew
>theft
Yeah thanks mum
>>272677643
>32 days
Just keep your head down and it will be over before you know it. One month is barely a slap on the wrist.
I have to say this prison has a pretty lenient policy on drugs
>>272678705
oh shit kojima is checking in on us
Gaben decides to go cry in the toilets and ends up finding a gift from the Gods
>>272679105
a gift from Ken-sama?
>What's up everybody? It's critical.
>not playing the hardcore /jp/ Umineko mod, what are you? A casual?
As expected of /v/ White sissy boys. Pathetic.
>>272678496
>Crazy Jew
>Theft
After equiping this new katana with steel folded 20 GORZILLION times he decides it's finally time to visit his new home
>>272679105
i dont understand if the gift is the katana or the tranquilizer dart or both
>>272679386
WATASHI WA
>>272679386
Whitu piggu, go homu.
Too bad everyone in this goddamn place has a weapon
>>272678105
>zimbabwe
>>272679621
You can take on the guy with the broom
This chink fucker tries to take Gabens pride and joy away from him.
>>272679871
*unsheates katana*
Gaben bravely refuses to relinquish the sword that has been in his family for a whole 2 minutes
>>272679871
Most dishonolabre
>>272679871
Is that tracer tong?
>>272679871
continue
>>272679829
oh fuck me I see it
Gaben bravely loses the sword in a fight where he just sort of falls over
>>272680414
Your sword has been tarnished, commit sudoku now.
>>272680414
>E-003
Mace Windu entrusts Gaben with a secret mission, is this a chance for him to regain his lost honor?
>>272680741
Are they kissing?
>>272680741
>that spiky-haired dude watching their embrace
Success! Gaben regains his katana and is then instantly insulted, Mace Windu slinks away like a pussy
This is MCdickie's game right?
Gaben is then insulted again...
>>272681321
Poor Gaben can't catch a break
...and again...
>>272681128
>>272680741
>The Dark Side
>Black gang
Gaben retires to his cell in tears, but look, it's his new cell mate maybe he will finally have a friend!
>>272681802
Oh fuck
y-you too
>>272682038
kill him
Having had enough of everyones shit he finally snaps and goes into an autistic rage
>>272682038
What a cheeky bastard, show him what happens when you cross Gaben-sama
>>272682038
you gonna take that shit?
>>272682316
fuck that cunt up
>>272682316
Oh shit, stab him
>>272682448
No controls when sanity is out.
>>272678873
>"Earn money by making chems!"
>There's a syringe of green chem on the floor behind him
I'm guessing there's a huge supply for that shit that it'll be useless to make more
>>272682316
Let the body odor do all the work, good job Gaben!
Rimmer runs away and his boyfriend threatens Gaben
Oh thank god, Gaben survived.
Did anyone save the "Kotick, Sanic, Notch and Gabe in Sims 3" Threads from awhile back?
>>272682783
>chris rimmer
>>272682783
>rimmer
Heh
>>272682783
Get Rimmer in a headlock again
>>272682783
Sounds like a right Smeg-head
The guard rapes Gaben so hard that he literally becomes one with the bars
The you testament is better
>All hail buddist Jesus
Reputation accurate
>>272679332
Where is this mod?
Gaben decides that he's had enough of the block as he is chased out by a retard with a broom
>>272683282
DICK POOP
>>272683391
>0$
time to sell hats
>>272683391
You need to make friends, Gaben
>>272683398
Welcome friend, it's indeed me, I just destroyed krillin
>>272677340
KING PUSSY?
The Chink has died, RIP
Max out int, go to the library and make dosh, bribe everyone.
This is the only way to win.
Fucking Rimmer
>>272683650
rip it n piece beautyful little angle
>>272683650
NOoooo, not him, he had two days to retirement
>>272683650
He died as he lived.
In a crappy game.
>>272683882
RIMMERRRRRR!!
Gaben decides that it might be safer in the yard even though he hasn't exercised in 17 years
>>272684123
>that nigga in the back
Damn.
>>272684123
Rimmer's boyfriend is going on a gun-toting rampage
t-thanks for the advice
>>272684415
>That faggot copping a feel whilst staring in his eyes
Success! Gaben manages to find his long lost katana, he decides to call it "Kokku"
>>272679327
Was going to post asking if this was the game critikal played. If I remember correctly he was constantly attacking people and guards but the guards were defending him in court and he kept getting away with it somehow
>>272684749
Gonna need to get some healthcare soon, all that exercising is taking its toll on him.
Fucks given = -300
>>272678326
It won't stop you from acting any more like an idiot.
Also, someone do a play through of the games with Jesus and Muhammad.
what is this shitty game xd
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QBpSHgrVvgc
Marigold is best prisoner
>>272684979
Those two people looking at him like he was an actual fucking bomb
Step it up
http://m.youtube.com/?#/watch?v=BDIWGaDBkwg
Are you afraid haha.wav
This guy is clearly ignoring Gabens obviously Japanese heritage
>>272685079
It's The you testament and Jesus is buddist in this game.
>>272685094
Hard Time
Sorry I was going to write a caption for this but i'm laughing too hard at this fucking picture
>>272685462
Why does Gaben look like that kid who, in turn, looks like a thumb?
>>272685462
gaben casually takin a selfie while being threatened. pure badass.
>>272685689
There's no reason to be upset
>>272685689
>"Step up, senpai!"
>>272685689
reminds me of this picture
>>272685689
>The great thing about HL3 isn't making the game, it's showing everyone online that I didn't
>>272685758
"watching his back" through his iPhone
>>272685507
Why didn't Dickie get a fatwa on his head for The Making of a Prophet? Those Danish cartoon makers got death threats, and they didn't even try to make fun of the Sunni-Shi'a split.
Gaben once again loses his Kokku as it is about to be inserted into this niggers colon
>>272685919
>>272685689
Holy fuck it's exactly the same
>>272686112
Oh shit, 1 hour till lock-up and GabeN's bleeding out
>>272685942
Cause MDickie would beat the shit out of them, he knows wrestling too good.
>>272686112
wait wasnt chink dead? undead chink mofo back to rape your niggers
Gaben sits by himself and starts shoveling food into his fat face
>>272686460
He looks like he's not doing too well
>>272686460
Is he eating or painting?
>>272685689
>>272686112
>>272686460
Saddest story I've ever heard
>>272686460
Comfort eating isn't going to get Kokku back
>>272679829
FUCK ME
Fuck off Anton i'm not in the mood for your shit
>>272686797
Those don't look like sausages...
>>272686797
>that bomb
Gaben, you're gonna get charged more time son
>>272686797
Is thatA BOMB?
You didn't see shit
>>272686797
>The Powers That Be
>>272686969
No Witnesses!
He did see shit
>>272686969
DID YOU FUCKING MURDER ANTON?
>>272687113
rip in kill
>>272687113
Good night sweet prince.
>>272687113
RIP IN RIPPED PIECES
>>272686969
did you blow him up right then and there?
"Why didn't I just release Half Life 3?"
Aww fuck yes! Gaben finally has a friend
>>272687286
Someone shop in some spaghetti.
>>272687481
He's gay, isn't he?
>>272687286
>bomb still on the floor
>>272687481
>what's mine is mine
>what's yours is mine too
seems like a solid friend to have.
t-thanks friend ;__;
>>272686797
>>272687072
Funny thing was that's what I named my ffaction in HCTP.
>>272687286
Don't hit him anymore, Danny Trejo!
>>272687632
>Gaben learns the hard way about deadlines
>>272682783
rimmer
>>272687481
lister
what the smeg is going on here, holly?
>>272686797
Iluminerty!
"Ahh not really"
>tfw you'll never spend time in the southtown correctional facility
>>272687873
Everybody's dead, Dave
Make a note guys, child abuse is worse than fraud
>>272688023
everybody?
>>272688120
This fucking game
>>272688120
This isn't a fucking contest guy
>>272688120
That's feminist propoganda
.
>>272688120
One of those guards has his head so far up Gaben's ass it's literally in there.
Fuck off Illuminati Joe
>>272688120
Child abuse makes for best bragging rights
>>272688192
Yes Dave, Everybody's dead
>>272683650
>TFW some nip takes your prized authentic Katana and commits Sudoku with it
>>272679105
GLORIOUS NIPPON STEEL
What would /v/'s prisoner name be?
>>272688396
>Rimmer has just given up
>>272688396
Nigga a quadraplegic can walk faster than Joe.
>>272688428
captain hollister?
Gaben is the finest piece of ass in Southtown apparently
>>272688537
Arcade Arrest
>>272688673
That middle guy has a murderer's eye
>>272688635
Everybody's dead Dave.
>>272688537
>big pussy
i'm in fucking tears.
>>272688120
I thought prisoners would beat the shit out of pedo's and child abusers?
Why does everyone look like an N64 wrestler?
>>272688537
SLAB BULKHEAD
>>272688854
hardtime works outside of standard parameters
>>272688854
That's the joke you nimrod.
Gaben runs at SANIC speed back to the East block
>>272688823
what, peterson?
>>272688860
The guy originally made a wrestling game before this. This game is like 80% reused assets. Even the crowd in the court room is cheering and shit.
>>272688940
They're all dead, Everybody's Dead Dave.
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
>>272689073
Rest In Peace Big Pussy, We Hardly Knew Ye
>>272689073
Damn that was like ten minutes. A fitting end for someone with such a name.
>>272689073
HE JUST GOT THERE
>>272689073
lives up to his name
>>272689048
what about krissie kochanski?
I didn't fix this in any way, Lister seriously killed Big Pussy in my playthrough
>>272688990
MDickie made so many bad games
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CwHiQBLl9aU
>prophet muhammad simulator
It's actually pretty impressive when you realize it's just one guy though
>>272689073
Someone must have pounded that pussy to death
>>272689073
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nSz16ngdsG0
;_;7
>>272689204
Gordon Bennett, Yes Krissie. Everybody. Everybody's dead Dave.
>>272686797
>The Powers The B
Death Grips all up in this nigga yo
>>272689073
Where were you anons when you heard the news?
>>272689438
I was at home
I received call
"Big Pussy is kill"
"No..."
I swear I didn't fix this in any way, Lister seriously killed Big Pussy in my playthrough
>>272689412
even rimmer?
>>272689073
Never forget ;-;
>>272689073
big pussy ain't got time for no jail nigga
he rather be dead than a fucking inmate
i bet he even did this himself too, fucking pussy
>>272689559
Lister the Big Pussy fister
>>272689572
He's dead. Everybody's dead. Everybody Is Dead Dave.
>>272689559
Lister is on a killing spree man
>>272689660
Shut the fuck up
>>272689660
wait, are you trying to tell me everyones dead?
>>272689559
Listerfiend was trying to kill Pillow Pants. Big Pussy was caught in the crossfire.
This prison is horrendously run, jesus christ
>>272689559
Mr Lister Big Pussy fister
>>272688537
>>272689073
Somebody Screencap this.
After hearing this shocking news Gaben decides to go to bed, watched by Rimmer the whole time... what is he planning?
>>272689875
you're going to have to kill him you know
Oh God this is an amazing thread
>>272683882
Can't simmer the rimmer.
>>272689875
I can feel the awkwardness Gaben must be feeling.
>>272690029
shut up faggot.
>>272689870
I posted the first Big Pussy pic from a Bro Team vid since I thought it was a funny name, not even OP
Never knew what I'd cause ;_;
...You all know what must be done...
>>272690134
no u r
>>272690206
There can be only 1 in 3!
>>272690206
THERE CAN ONLY BE ONE 003
I wish someone would make a decent version of this game. Like why the hell does it take so long to load? Why are there loading screens for these tiny areas?
>>272689875
>laying half naked in bed in a seductive pose
>obviously awake
>rubbing crotch
>Rimmer staring at him longingly.
Look lively folks. There's a steam sale and Gaben's ass is 75% off.
>>272690206
Make Half Life 3?
>>272690206
Kill him with his own knife and cut him in pieces
Make it look like he did it himself
Rimmer beats the shit out of Gaben and steal his cleaver, but wait, we could use this guy
>>272679327
>Hello and welcome guys to Hardtime
>Denied Anal
>>272690597
Was that really necessary?
Rimmer beats the shit out of Gaben and steal his cleaver, but wait, this could work
>>272690545
>Accepted > Denied
>>272690597
There's already a thread you know, check your address bar
>>272690730
He'll never suspect murder if you kill him whilst he's guarding you
Fuck off Mace Windu!
You can thank this guy for creating this gem
Really wish he'd put all his stuff on steam, he sells a disk with all of his games for $10, if it was available digitally I'd buy it in a heartbeat
>>272679327
chef vortivask is a legend
>>272690824
Yeah, you are supposed to take him to the bathroom and then kill him there.
But wait, whats this? Kukko descends from the heavens and into Gabens hands once again
>>272690882
SITH LORDS CONFIRMED
GET HYPE
>>272691119
These misfire posts, they're like an episode synopsis!
>>272691119
Don't get people's hopes up like that
>>272691119
stop forgetting the pictures you faggot
>>272677643
>American flag
>"defence"
Something is fishy...
Fuck I keep forgetting to post an image
But wait, whats this? Kukko descends from the heavens and into Gabens hands once again
>>272691406
it was worth the weight
>>272685393
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BDIWGaDBkwg
Fixed the link for you, the fuck is going on
>>272691406
Time to murder that faggot Rimmer
>>272690774
Denied > Accepted
Get your facts straight
Go Mace! Go! Do what you must!
>>272690882
CJ, what are you doing here?
>>272691406
CUT DOWN THE RIMMER
>>272688396
that nigga on right about to go super sayain
And here we are... The final boss...
>>272688396
Someone mail this pic to Gabe, maybe he'll take the hint and speed up HL3
>>272691790
STANDING HERE
>>272691790
VIOLENCE BREEDS VIOLENCE
>>272691790
There can only be one!
Stream this shit OP
>>272682783
>rimmer
>>272691790
>MY OWN TWIN
>NOW NEITHER OF US WILL BE VIRGINS
>>272691790
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7XmDYJBZZdc
>>272691790
RULES OF NATURE
>>272691930
Seconding
ALL HAIL KING GABEN OF THE EAST BLOCK
>>272691954
you messed that up m8
>>272692189
>and what do you think you are going to do about it?
>>272692189
RIGHT IN THE FACE
>>272692189
Did he just gouge his fucking eyes out?
>>272692189
>And soon, everyone will see what I'll do to you with this sword
>>272692189
Did Gaben stab him in the eye, jesus
And Gaben has his first Vassal
this thread is confusing but I like it
>>272692497
HE WANTS YOU TO FINISH THE JOB
>>272692660
DO IT
>>272692176
>>272691930
Thirded
>>272692497
DO IT FGT
In just a single day Gaben has changed from a friendly chubby middleaged guy to a hardened prison killer
>>272692497
DO IT DO IT DO IT
>>272691930
a stream would be better since i hate sitting here refreshing
>>272692824
IT'S HAPPENING
>>272692824
FINISH HIM
>>272692824
IMMINENT DESTRUCTION
>>272692824
All because of fraud.
>>272692824
>A single day
>>272693005
Fraud changes men anon
Godspeed you magnificent bastard!
What should we name our black bro?
>>272693132
Cuckles
>>272693132
Big Pussy
>>272691930
>>272692176
>>272692849
>>272692945
Sorry I played the game then took the screenshots, this is all history
Biggus Dickus
>>272693207
He'll never replace the original though ;_;
>>272693132
Spiderman
>>272693287
Aw damn
Well once your done someone needs to start a stream of Anthony Burch being sent to prison for adultery
>>272693132
Little Dick, Big Heart
>>272693132
Black watermelon
Oh shit that guy had henchmen, black bro I need you!
>>272693450
Make it happen
>>272693542
Why's that nigger on the stairs wearing a tie?
http://youtu.be/LHI2bZ-Rbso
>prison simulator
>no booty acquisition system
Someone tell MDickie him to update the game.
>>272693667
because the nigger is fabulous
>>272693667
He's a Boss Nigger
>>272693450
I'd do it if my PC wasn't complete shit.
They all want Gabens throne
>>272693946
>suns of god
Would you watch it?
>>272694068
FUND IT
>>272694068
no but this is gold none the less.
>>272693450
I've streamed for /v/ before and could do it, but I might have to do some stuff in the next half hour or so. After that I should be good.
I may have started a civil war in the goddamn prison
>>272694229
Thanks Flanders.
>>272694229
Robin Simpson did nothing wrong
>>272694229
>It's suddenly become Gaben of Thrones
>>272694068
Wow that's amazing
>>272694229
>Flanders vs Simpson
>>272694068
I am become kek
Fuck off Mace Windu!
>>272694068
>mfw Big Pussy died before meeting with Gaben ;_;
>>272693542
Oh shit, it's Walter White.
>>272694507
>I sense a plot to overthrow the warden
>>272694540
Lest we forget ;_;7
All these shitty lords lining up to kiss King Gabens feet
>>272694507
>About to join the Dark Side
>"Hey, remember you're on a mission to join The Dark Side by 14:00... "
>"Gaben's a rat, get him!"
Thanks Mace.
>>272679327
>what comes to mind every time somebody mentions hard times
Critikal you marvelous bastard
>>272677340
>manlet
But Gaben is fucking HUGE, in all dimensions.
>>272677791
>Southtown
PREDICTABLE!!! LET'S BOOGIE-DOODY!!!
All these shitty lords lining up to kiss King Gabens feet
"y-your really pretty Gaben"
>>272681874
>mfw I've seen the source
OH LORD I KNOW WHERE CRITIKAL GETS HIS MATERIAL FROM
The 2D version of Hardtime is better, OP. Go check it out.
Make money and join a gang.
>>272694959
>those battle-scarred hands
>>272694959
I THINK WE'RE GETTING BLOWJOBS TONIGHT
>>272694959
>Why won't Gaben-Senpai notice me?
>>272694959
Gaben got swole.
>>272694068
>explosive rimjob
Oh please no
>>272694992
no its even shittier
I AM BECOME DEATH DESTROYER OF WORLDS!
>>272694959
Gaben is a big guy.
>>272694959
>Any job I want eh...
>>272695239
>those two black guys looking eachother sensually in the eyes
>>272695239
CRABMAN!? NO!!
>>272695239
>those dead bodies
>gaben gouging eyes out
>those two niggers kissing to take their mind off the carnage
This fucking game
>>272695239
>Charles Barkley kissing some nigger on the stairs
>>272695239
remember youre on a mission to join the dark side by 14:00
>>272695239
AVENGE BIG PUSSY
No I think I'm a big guy because I just killed like 3 people
>>272695239
Breakdown soon
>>272695819
forhim
>>272695819
YOU'RE A BIG MAN
>>272695819
Oh, how little he knows
Gaben... are you ok? Gaben? Gabeeeeeeeeeen!
>>272695819
>That hair
Psymon?
>>272696048
what
>>272696048
He will finally be able to meet Big Pussy ;_;
>>272687113
HE DINDU NUFFIN
R.I.P. King Gaben, First of his name
1947-2014
He entered prison for fraud and became a king
nvr 4get his journey ;__;
>>272696048
Oh shit, GABE PLEASE GET UP!
>>272696048
Don't you die on me!
>>272691790
KURT RUSSELL VS GABEN THE FINAL FIGHT
>>272679245
Even in death, he protects the worthy
>>272696048
No! Open your eyes!
R.I.P. King Gaben, First of his name
1947-2014
He entered prison for fraud and became a king
nvr 4get his journey ;__;
Also RIP that chink fucker, Rimmer, Lister and Highlander guy + about 50 other people
>>272696048
>Prostitution
>>272696512
Told you Everybody's Dead, Dave.
>>272696512
Killed by a manwhore
Ohh OP. I can't remember when was the last time when I had such a good laugh that tears came out of my eye.
Thank you.
>>272696512
He died doing what he loved
>>272690384
Cut him into 3 pieces so nobody suspects it was you
>>272696512
That's what you get for not releasing HL3 you fat fucker.
>>272696512
RIP in peace
>>272696512
is he kill?
>>272696512
>killed by a male hooker
>>272696512
>"It took 12 of you to kill me?"
is it ok to stream now OP? didn't want to interrupt your plan
I think I'm ready to go
>>272696512
in his one day of prison, he: loved, lost, became a king of men, and died a hero
rip gayben
http://team.forsvarsmakten.se/english/#/private/7q2LCauftX
play swedish games with me pls
>>272696512
You're gonna carry that weight
Well shit that was a great journey
If this doesn't get made into a movie that wins at least 6 Oscars then I will be very disappointed
Hope you guys enjoyed this just thought we needed more of these threads
R.I.P In Peaces King Gaben ;__;
![a71c732840[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/vWluRqQ.jpg "a71c732840[1]")
![book_cover[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/EcRRUC3.jpg "book cover[1]")
