What would Seinfeld be like if it was still on today?
Too many white people. Tumblr would be triggered.
>JERRY, KRAMER AND GEORGE ARE WHITE CIS MALE WHO RAPE EVERY EPISODE
>JERRY THERE'S PEOPLE RIOTING OUTSIDE YOUR BUILDING
>outside my building?
>OUTSIDE YOUR BUILDING
>why
>BECAUSE WE'RE TOO WHITE
>too white?
>TOO WHITE, JERRY
and then there'd be laugh tracks sprinkled throughout
>>68071766
Assuming it was still on NBC? Single camera format. No laugh track. At least one gay character and one that speaks broken english. It would be a lot zanier, less observational.
They'd be pushing for diversity like a motherfucker
Despite having women, jews, a few black people, a fag or two they'd probably turn George into a shemale and Elaine into a goddamn shaved head hambeast
>>68071927
my sides
>>68072095
Imagine the irony of turning Kramer into the black guy
Jerry would be a female.
Kramer would be black.
Elane would be a fat hambeast.
George and Newman would be rolled into 1 character, he would be the bad white cis male of the show.
>>68071766
It would be no where near as funny today. The writers would probably be pressured into having a diverse cast and the general audience are a lot softer.
>SEInFELD SO wHiTe
jery get ipad
>>68071766
It would be the same if Larry David was still working on it.
Jary gaze wistfuly at his own reflectien in the miror
JARY: Whats the deal ... with me?
He search his sad eyes for an answer but find none
Is it really okay to grab food from the garbage bin if it's just on top?
Wouldn't be much different with Seinfeld and Larry David still behind the wheel.
JERY: you took a pill in ibiza?
GERGE: Ya
JERY: WHY?
GERGE: to show AVIICI i was cool
JERY: but ur not cool
KRAM: its pronounced IBITHA
>>68072193
They'd probably due like The Big Baboozle Theory and give everyone a girlfriend/boyfriend and dumb down the humor and enhance the laugh tracks
>>68071766
utter shit tbqhfam
JERY: so u MURDERED her?
GERGE: ya
JERY: Becase she didnt turn on your POST NOTIFICATIONS??
GERGE: so
JERY: all u post is calzone pics!
>>68072210
Came for this
JERY: Whats the DEAL with pi
GERGE: It ratio of circle circumference to its diameter BABY
JERY: Whens the last time u had sex
GERGE: 2011
JERY: no title?
KENDRICK: no title! its called Untitled
JERY:So theres a title
KENDRICK: No! im naming it Untitled
JERY: THATS THE TITLE
GERGE: she FRIENDZONED me Jery
JERY: She FRIENDZONED you?
GERGE: Im in the ZONE BABY!!!
JERY: What r u gona do?
GERGE: comitt murder
>>68071766
>Kramer: Oh jeez Jerry I messed up bad. I tried to do some amateur stand up and... and niggers Jerry, niggers.
JERY: This weed dank af. i bet u $100 u cant smoke whole blunt
KRAM: pff
2 min later
Kram slam down $100
KRAM: im out of the chron test
>>68072254
I wish they would tweet more. Or maybe I never used it right. His tweets would never appear on my timeline.
I know tumblr is garbage but FakeSeinfieldPlots is pretty damn funny
>>68072252
IT'S TRASH
>>68072254
That's horrible.
>>68071927
That episode where Jerry tells a fat nudist that being comfortable with his body is a problem would get the show cancelled.
I love the fake seinfeld episodes on social media. It's one of the few reasons I have twitter.
The existence of smartphones would make it slightly less funny, but it wouldn't be that different.
>>68071927
That actually happened at the time, although it was more of a joke than outrage. People were always saying "where are all the black people that live in New York?"
>JERRY, IT'S A NIGGER JERRY!
>LOOK IT'S A NIGGER!
>>68072210
>took 9 posts
>KRAMER THAT'S NOT POLITICALLY CORRECT!
>hurr they'd all be black xDD
Not even true. Plenty of shows are still mostly white.
>>68072626
That George plot actually sounds funny.
https://soundcloud.com/mcmangos/what-if-seinfeld-theme-song
Kram BERST into Jerys place smoking 2 huge blunts
JERY: 2 blunt?? whats the deal
KRAM: Im *camra zoom in* double jointed
gerge breakdance
kremer vandalises wikipedia
It would basically be Always Sunny in Philadelphia.
A racially diverse cast who fart into trumpets every episode
gerg learns elaines pronouns
Kramer becomes a freelance top-10-list writer for clickbait websites.
Jerry is increasingly accused of being a misogynist after a slight misunderstanding.
if it actually were still on, it'd be a lot more like Curb.
Jerry would be rich and successful and yet deeply relatable
>>68073391
Not Kramer.
Jerry would spend an entire episode dodging rumors that someone has been adding to his wikipedia page.
The episode ends with Newman cackling while typing on his computer.
George starts claiming he has Asperger syndrome in order to take advantage of others.
Elaine dates an Uber driver and finds herself in the middle of a violent turf war between taxis and ride-sharing services.
Kramer tries to sue Gawker with the help of Jackie Chiles.
>>68072626
>FakeSeinfieldPlots
thxxx it made my night
>>68073842
the fake Seinfeld reunion in Curb wasn't that great thoit's still one of my fav arch
>>68074201
Seinfeldvision from 30 Rock was funny, though.
>SJW? What the hell is an SJW?
>They're the new nazis, Jerry! The Gestapo has nothing on these guys!
>Now wait, George, that's a bit of a stretch, isn't it? What, are they cannibals?
>>68074201
>I didn't know what the fuck a groat's disease was, but I'll tell you one thing. That motherfucker right there, that goofy motherfucker in that room... He gonna survive that shit.
Fuck, should I rewatch Seinfeld or start watching Curb?
>>68072394
lel
>>68075002
start watching curb
>>68072626
>>68072025
what the fuck does this even mean?
anti-sjw humour is the worst type of humour
But it IS still on today
>>68071927
>JERRY, KRAMER AND GEORGE ARE FUCKING JEWS REEEEEEEEEEEEEE
fify
>>68075002
free on amazon prime mate
>>68072210
>>68072233
>>68072265
>>68072318
>>68072365
>>68072394
>>68072416
>>68072517
Just wanted to say these made me laugh. Thanks man :)
>Jerry gets paranoid about his girlfriend’s past when her iPhone automatically connects to the wi-fi at Newman’s apartment.
The K-Man starts banging the trap next door and George accidentally calls her a dude
>>68075667
It was actually pretty authentic feeling.
>>68075002
Watch Curb faggot
It would be called bennis
>Nobody posts my fan fic
I will do it
>Kramer: WHY DIDN'T YOU LIKE MY PICTURE ON FACEBOOK JERRY?
>Jerry: Well I just didn't like it, I'm not a guy who hands out likes just like that. If I did, what's the point, it ruins the system!
>Kramer: Well George and Elaine liked it! Why can't you!?
>>68076666
dumb /sp/ shitriposter
>>68076691
I don't even know what /sp is aha
>>68071766
Replace "Not that there's anything wrong with that" to refer to trannys instead of fags.
>[George and Jerry are in Jerry's apartment, on the couch looking at their iPads]
>George: "Have you seen this new baneposting meme?"
>Jerry: "Again with the memes, George?"
>George: "Well, have you seen it or not?"
>Jerry: "No, George, I haven't seen it."
>George: "It's ridiculous, Jerry! All they do is write 'you're a big guy' and 'for you' over and over!"
>Jerry: "George, you know I'm not really into the meme stuff. I don't meme. I'm not a memer!"
>George: "Well, this meme has gone too far! Too far, Jerry! And I'm going to do something about it!"
>[Kramer bursts into the room]
>Kramer: "What's George yelling about?"
>Jerry: "He doesn't like the new baneposting meme."
>Kramer: "Oh ho ho ho! Looks like we got ourselves a hothead!"
>George: "That's it! I've had it!"
>[George storms out of the apartment]
>>68071766
>current year
>putting your ketchup in the fridge
>>68076053
>amazon prime
>free
>>68071766
The greatest non Jewish show made by Jews. You cannot argue with this!
It's Always Sunny except with less ridiculous plotlines.
>>68078065
>not getting 2-day shipping
>Bubble Boy: The Moors.
>George: I'm sorry the answer we were looking for was "Moops."
>BB: It's a misprint!
*Susan looking it up on her iPhone*
>Susan: George, he's right, look.
>BB: Ha! Told ya.
>George: The card clearly says "Moops", Susan.
>>68078525
modern day technology would sure ruin this show
>>68072210
HERE IT IS
>Well, it happened!
>What happened?
>Remember my parents getting divorced?
>Yes.
>Well my father informed me he was transitioning.
>Transitioning, into what?
>A woman, Jerry, my father wants to be a woman now.
>... but he's almost 80. Why?
>Says he's tired of being trapped into a cocoon and wants to live the remainder of his life as his true self.
>As an old woman with a mustache?
>>68072254
christ
George: (acting cool) So Jerry, you uhhhh... you been on this... internet thing at all?
Jerry: (sarcastic) No George. What's the internet?
George: (flustered) All right! No need to get butthurt.
Jerry: Butthurt?
George: Butthurt! You know, it means-
Jerry: (annoyed) I know what it means! Why are YOU saying it?
-Kramer bursts into the room-
Kramer: (panicking) I'M A MEME!
>>68079098
-Kramer bursts into the room-
Kramer: I FOUND HER!
Jerry: Found who?
K: Elaine. I found her on the internet.
George: Aren't we all her Facebook friends?
K: No, Georgie boy, it's not what I meant. Look.
*Kramer unpauses video on his iPad*
*Jerry and George's eyes widened*
J: Sweet Moses.
George: Bluetooth me that new song Jerry
Jerry: Bluetooth? You still use Bluetooth? You know phones can connect to the internet now, right?
George: Don't start with that smartphone stuff Jerry. I don't want to own any technology that's smarter than me
Elaine: George that's ridiculous. Your flip phone is already a lot smarter than you
>>68079377
>yfw Larry David is lurking ITT and is going to steal these jokes
HE CAN TALK HE CAN TALK HE CAN TALK
>>68071927
>>68072095
>>68072182
>>68072193
>People who have never watched Seinfeld
Seinfeld stopped performing at colleges because he couldn't stand the politically correct crowd. Larry David is a crotchety old man. The show would be exactly the same as it was in the 90s, minus the occasional reference to an iPhone.
Didn't Curb your Enthusiasm do a whole Seinfeld reunion episode?
>>68072210
i dont get it
>>68079818
how not?? i BERST instant laughter
>>68079948
jerry cant even internet
>>68072626
this is pretty sci-fi
>>68079377
good writing
>>68072025
do i have to visit tumblr or something to "get" jokes like this?
Kramer: Jerry, I was looking through your twitter and noticed you've dropped a couple of hundred followers after your last tweet
Jerry: ah if they don't like what I say then they can leave, it's no big deal to me
George: No big deal? You've lost 200 followers. You have, what, 50 followers left now?
Jerry: No, it's more like 6,000
George: What? 6,000? That really high right?
Elaine: No, I have 3,000
Kramer: 25,000
Jerry: What about you George?
George: ....12
>>68079572
no ty larry
leave it be
>>68071766
>old jews the show
>2016
either cucked to death on NBC or IDGAF racist on HBO
>>68075667
give me some pro-sjw humor
>>68080848
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wzu8LMUGV5c
>>68082307
terrible
>>68080848
SHOES!
>>68071766
>What would Seinfeld be like if it was still on today?
>>68072210
>It took this long
>>68082307
>>68072265
>>68072318
>>68072365
>>68072394 (this one especially)
>>68072416
>>68072813
Its a male fat nudist, nobody would give a shit
I just watched the cigar store Indian episode yesterday and I immediately thought you couldn't do an episode about that without people losing their minds.
>>68076524
This could work as a Seinfeld episode, it has all the elements of the classic episodes.
>Kramer has a new hobby
>George has a scheme to improve his life
>Kramer's hobby and George's scheme mix up
>>68076560
10/10
where's the beta uprising pasta
I'm not the only to do impressions of their voices when reading each of these fake dialogues, r-right?
>>68086465
Is there more?
>>68072210
Jerry2000
>>68075759
I was just saying this at work the other day
What modern reasons would Jerry have for ending a relationship?
>she uses the t9 setting on her phone
>she wont tell me her wifi password
>she wants to start a joint facebook account
Curb Your Enthusiasm was Modern Seinfeld.
>>68086984
>>she wants to start a joint facebook account
fucking this, jesus
>>68086984
>she uses the t9 setting on her phone
Hey now, there's nothing wrong with t9
ELAINE FARTS INTO THE CAMERA AND SHOWS THE SOLES OF HER FEET EPISODE
jerry dates taylor swift
>>68086984
>When they dine out he has to take pictures of his food before eating
>>68086984
>>68087077
the fuck is t9?
>>68087215
The old style of input where you has a 1-9 numpad with like 3 letters bound to each key
>>68086984
>She constantly uses his laptop and logs into all her accounts and always leaves it on auto-login
>Texting at dinner or watching a movie
>Whenever in conversation someone asks her about the meaning or background of something she kills the conversation by saying "just google it"
>>68071766
/tv/ would hate it
Would complain about jews, stronk female character and memes
>it's a Jerry complains about people more poor and less fortunate than him episode
>guest star: random playboy slut as Jerry's girlfriend
>>68087295
>>68087215
No, t9 is predictive input for old cellphones with 3 letters per key. Basically you started typing a word like you normally would with a keypad like that. For example if I wanted to text the word "nigger" to someone
>press 6, since it has the letter N as one of the letters
>the letter N gets written
>then press 4, since it has the letter I in it
>the letter I gets written
>press 4 again since it also has the letter G in it
>phone predicts that I want to type the word "nigger" and writes the letter G
>press 4 again, it writes G since it knows I want to write "nigger"
>press 3, it gives me an E
>press 7, it gives me an R
It saved you a lot of time over the traditional typing style where you needed to for example press the 6-button 3 times to write the letter O. If it predicted the word wrong you pressed the star button to change the word or some other button to manually type the word and save it so it knows you want to use that word in the future.
Most phones also learned your most commonly used words so it got extremely accurate when you used it for a year or more.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZfE3spFhDqY&nohtml5=False
Ps. how the fuck do you not know what t9 is? Are you underage or something? All phones in 2000-2010 had it
>>68076524
>>68076560
>>68076585
good work anon, Larry D. would be proud
>>68071927
there all jews
>>68087448
>Ps. how the fuck do you not know what t9 is? Are you underage or something? All phones in 2000-2010 had it
just didn't know what it was called. I used to be able to txt so much quicker on old nokia and sony ericsson phones with t9.
>>68086465
awful
>>68086465
fucking delete that garbage
>>68072893
> People were always saying "where are all the black people that live in New York?"
people said that about friends, not seinfeld. there were literally no black people on friends ever.
George would be black
Kramer would be trans
Jerry would be Lena Dunham
The episodes would revolve not around nothing but about how stupid white males are
>>68087706
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oUc0vbSlanM
>>68086465
I-I don't get it
>>68087777
Don't even need to click the link to know that's based docfuture1
also nice quads
>>68073073
Let's change that...together.
>>68088142
I'm free today.
>>68087706
I never understood that though. Manhattan is overwhelmingly white.
>>68086984
> she uses too many emojis
> she has more twitter followers than him
> she has a neck tattoo
>>68076142
That's a true Seinfeld plot right there.
>>68080848
That was not the point, applying your SJW cliche jokes to yet another topic doesn't make your saracasm more original.
>>68087727
Wow what a great funny post I'm glad you took your time to type these totally original ideas out thanks
>Jerry helps George stalk his girlfriend to see if she's really reading his texts, but just chooses not to respond for hours
>Elaine meets a guy who's protesting and pretends to be there for the same reason, then has to try and figure out what it is she's agreed to
>Kramer opens a portal to the netherworld killing him instantly
>Jerry puts disingenuous "interests" on his facebook to attract women who enjoy yoga and rockclimbing, etc
that kinda thing
>>68089637
one of these things is not like the others
>>68077973
>>Kramer: "Oh ho ho ho! Looks like we got ourselves a hothead!"
>>68075759
is it a meme
or is it really as good as good ol' Seinfeld?
>>68089973
no
no
it's damn good and has tons of memorable shit but to say it's a good as seinfeld is totally ridiculous
here's some scenes:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XCfe7xAvbD8
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9HilyOLWzrM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LJDgVlv55Uw
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-yUafzOXHPE
>>68090077
Whoops forgot to post my favorite scene:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tQuBdeuvMnY
okay maybe it is as good as seinfeld because this shit is still funny years later.
>>68072813
Imagine a character on Girls saying that to Lena Dunham.
>>68090151
Jokes like this really clashed with with Mac suddenly being "obviously gay".
>>68072182
>Kramer would be black.
That way he can sayniggerall the time.
>>68090350
Mac has been a closeted gay man since the first episode. Watch it again and pay attention to his dialogue.
>>68071766
>Seinfeld sequel featuring the gang getting into wacky hijinks in a maximum security prison
Fund it
>>68071766
Bunch of senior citizens get together in an apartment & do nothing (笑´・艸・) What do think of the senior citizens' s version of "Beverly Hills 90210". The show takes a look through the eyes of elderly into the problem that society holds. That will be fun eh ?
>>68087448
>Ps. how the fuck do you not know what t9 is? Are you underage or something? All phones in 2000-2010 had it
ps do you know how pro bullying you just made everybody?
>>68090497
Their sentence was like six months you goober. They'd have been out for like two decades at this point.
>>68090516
>10yo weeb-cartoony drawings
this is making me so nauseous
>>68072025
Sounds good, but I just realized it fits Rick and memey as well.
>>68090350
So much funnier when you arent sure.
Way to ruin the joke joke,newly wealthy and political hollywood insiders.
>>68075002
Curb all the way
>>68090621
You almost had fun,close call.
>>68087706
you say that but try watching Friends
they start appearing everywhere after a while
>>68071766
D R O P P E D
