I just watched these for the first time this weekend. I knew you guys didn't like them but I was not prepared for this. Oh my GOD. I can't even go on. What the FUCK happened? How can this even be made?
>>66453276
>How can this even be made?
I wonder
>>66453589
Fuck, forgot the pic.
>>66453276
I was so fucking mad after the seeing it, coming in with high hopes after being a huge LOTR fan
>>66454303
I can't understand why it got so fucked up and lost. The Hobbit is a short and less weighty book than any chapter of LOTR. It's a good book but it's simple and concise, kids could read it. It could have been made into a really good 2 hour flick. This fucking Hobbit trilogy though. I knew going into it that the hobbit story could be told in one full length movie. I'm still fucking out of sorts after watching all three in a weekend. What the fuck were they doing.
Before people over-analyze the everloving fuck out of it, I'll break it down simply: the dumbass studio split one book into 3 movies. The movies were chock full of endless filler; from pointless scenes and plotlines that go nowhere to character additions that make no sense and grant nothing to the story or narrative.
What should have been about 2 hours was stretched out to 8 or 9. Fucking torture.
It was a disaster in the making since day 1. Gone were the year(s) of pre-production that LOTR enjoyed.
A rushed pile of shit.
>>66453276
The really awful part is that in, at least the first two movies, there's about ten minutes of actually good content that gets overshadowed by all the shit.
I could watch Bilbo riddle with Gollum for another thirty minutes.
>But then the stupid fucking dwarfs show up
Oh, haha, Bilbo is outsmarting Smaug the Dragon, this is sort of fun.
>But then the stupid fucking Dwarfs show up.
>>66456124
And the CGI looked xbox 360 tier
>>66456164
I really dug the singing in the beginning. Misty Mountains Cold a capella was pretty GOAT.
>>66456169
The overabundance of CGI made Ian McKellan have a breakdown and seriously reconsider his chosen profession.
For a fat bearded manlet, Jacko sure hates dwarves.
>>66453276
The desire to make a whole trilogy out of one book, del toro jumping ship and leaving jackson with limited time for preproduction, and excessive use of cgi are the biggest factors.
>>66456124
Yeah, when I heard about this simple book becoming three movies my fucking jaw dropped.
>>66453276
Jackson went full Lucas and overboard with the CGI.I'm one of those autists still mad about Smaug being a wyvern
>>66456275
This. PJ never wanted to make the movies.
Here's a video summarizing a lot of the issues.
https://youtu.be/SQkygZdZ_Vk
>>66456222
The problem is that shit ended up being totally out of tone with the rest of the film.
I watched the first musical number.
>Oh, well I guess they wanted to include a token nod to Tolkien. Alright.
Then the second musical number.
>Hmm, two back to back musical numbers? I guess that works - instead of a heavy, action packed fantasy epic, we're going to make it into more of a lighthearted Disney type story with lots of singing and dancing.
Then no more musicals for the next eleven hours.
>>66455982
>>66456124
>2 hours
You either cut out half the content or make the pacing absurdly hectic.
>>66456317
It's partly Jacksons fault as well, should've just taken what Guillermo had already prepped instead of trying to do his own thing in a fraction of the time.
>>66456330
Honestly, the Rankin Bass cartoon did it in 90 minutes, and it only felt a little bit rushed.
>>66456325
While the dishes song is definitely light-hearted, misty mountains is intended to be serious. It's kind of like saying lotr is disney singing and dancing because merry and pippin have the green dragon song and pippin sings to denethor.
>>66456325
that's the main thing I had an issue with: the tone.
some parts you get the whimsical light hearted stuff that comes with it being based on a children's book, like the songs and riddles, but then it goes full serious LoTR style.
even in the same scenes, like when the Goblin King is singing goblin town, and the dwarves are all grim serious faced as if facing down Sauron himself.
>>66456421
That movie is a cluster fuck.
>>66456330
Personally I was in favor of a 2 movie sequence, one up to being imprisoned by the forest elves and one for the rest
They could have easily done it by removing all the shitty filler they added.
Only new content they made that was enjoyable was Gandalf's adventure in Dol Guldur
You can literally read the book in less time than it takes to watch the three movies.
Okay, my serious complaint is with the Gandalf character. Hear me out for a second.
I feel like there are two Gandalf characters.
Gandalf the Grey
>Fun loving prankster
>Smokes the finest weed
>Visits his buddy on his birthday
>Gets up to all sorts of wacky misadventures
and then Gandalf the White
>One dimensional demigod with a singular purpose
>Must defeat evil
>Almost always serious in tone
>Always focused on objective: destroy all evil
There was absolutely no reason for Gandalf the White to be in the Hobbit movies, but that was the Gandalf they gave us.
He was always talking about fateful alliances and last stands and defeating the great evil. It was heavy and tedious and made the whole adventure feel forced and shitty.
I want a Gandalf that shows up at Bilbo's house in the middle of the night, telling Bilbo that his sketchy buddy gave him a real good lead on a get-rich-quick-scheme. See, these fucking Dwarfs left all this gold up in a mountain, with only like one dragon guarding it. Get past that motherfucker, and we all cash in Bilbo! Bilbo! Money! Fucking let's go get rich, motherfucker!
>>66456585
Focus and characterization was all over the place.
>>66456559
There are a number of fan cuts that do a good job cutting the filler. Most of the shit like the she-elf love triangle, wormtongue-lite, rabbit sled guy, all get axed and you literally can't tell they were missing. Try the maple films version. The guy even cut together the dol guldur stuff into a short film.
>>66456661
man the elf-dwarf love thing was so fucking forced and cringey it took me out of the movie
>>66456673
Why the fuck was it even there? Do the extras shed some light to the whole debacle?
>>66456686
my guess was it was an attempt to broaden the audience
>>66456686
probably a combination of >>66456713
and attempting to get more plot threads going.
You know, because a hobbit chatting with an eight foot dragon wasn't as interesting as cleaning and healing an arrow wound.
There's literally like a hundred things wrong with all of these movies.
>Why do Hobbiton skies suddenly look like the Aurora Borealis fucked the Mutara Nebula?
>Why do all the useless interchangeable Dwarfs have unique haircuts and weapons
>Why are these fuckers singing in this action movie?
>Why is there so much gruesome violence in this lighthearted children's movie?
>Trolls talk now
>Hahaha look how long and silly that contract is. Hahahaha
>Who the fuck is Radaghast the Brown?
>Is this really happening?
>No it can't be.
>Holy fuck it's actually happening.
>Someone put this shit into a movie
>Literally millions of dollars spent on a CGI rabbit sled
I'm not even an hour into the first film
>>66456767
I kinda want to defend the movie, but yeah, fuck radaghast. Fuck him and that goddamn sled.trolls talked in the book
>>66456767
Of all the things to point out, why the rabbit sled? It's pretty Hobbit-y as opposed to that whole subplot about Sauron.
>>66457086
Because it was retarded and made Jar Jar Binks looks like a competent design decision
>>66456124
Nailed it. The only thing I could add to your post is:
Jackson didn't want to do it, didn't care, had nothing to say, and it showed. Fran and Phillipa's influences were not felt and that's why even when they did come close to getting some of the real, moving, poetic stuff into the movies, it almost always failed.
Keyhole scene was almost perfect. Thorin's death had just enough of the spirit it should have had to piss me off. AD INFINITUM.
>>66456421
>>66456530
FIFTHTEEN BIRDS
>>66453276
Jackson is too old to do LoTR
>>66453276
i dont get all the hate
i liked them , watched all 3 extended and enjoyed most of it
sure, it wast the lotr expierience, but iam over 30 now, and most shows and movies are totally crap and/or propaganda
so iam happy if i can watch 9 hours something that´s only a little crappy and takes me back a little to easier times
>>66453276
> I knew you guys didn't like them
/tv/ in on sentence
