Early bird catches the worm, right? Well, from where I'm standing, Ray, it's just a plumper dish for the night owl.
post the one about hands
>What'd he do? Shit in em?!?
>The fucking Lebrons or whatever!
>12 years old and already evil as fuck
>Hey you see that stain on the ceiling? Did I ever tell you I lived in a basement for years?
This was such a dissappointment, but at least it was so bad that it actually managed to be funny sometimes.
The eyes are the window to a mans soul they say. Well then, I need some fucking glasses then.
I saved a guy's life once. Pulled him out of the water, kiss of life, all that. And he thanked me Ray. The asshole fucking thanked me
They say that the way to a man's heart is through his stomach, too bad I had a fucking gastrectomy.
the 'you're gonna need a restraining order' to his wife bit still gets me. What an autistic season
THE WAR WAS LOST
You think making it big is easy? Like it is just a dime a dozen? You know what I realized? I spent a quarter and all my eggs are broken
They say every man has his fork in the road? You better hope it's a big fucking fork because I have a wolf of an appetite.
I just finished the last episode. I thought the season was pretty damn good as a whole. A lot of people I'd seen commenting about it on torrent sites and such were saying it was terrible, but I really don't understand that. Is it unrealistic? Yes. Too much? Probably. I hate how TV always portrays cops doing illegal shit and touching everything without gloves on, but aside from that I enjoyed it. It was interesting seeing Vince Vaughn play a character like that.
>>63411440
You know I didn't even shitpost until I was 38.
His dialogues were so good.
It's a dog-eat-dog world and I'm the fucking chinaman.
>>63413866
Crying
>>63413866
kek
>>63413866
*doggy dog world
Time is a flat circle, Ray. Everything we have done or will do we will do over and over and over again- forever. Rust knew this.
If you dance with the devil, the devil don't change. He changes you. But I've been taking lessons Ray, and I'm feeling like Michael Flatley.
I had a nightmare Ray. I haven't had nightmares since I was a kid. Did you ever think Asuka would age Ray? That's my wife.
You know those pencils with the eraser on the the end? Greatest mistake humanity ever made. A generation of us grew up thinking we could fix our mistakes with just a flick of our hands.
>>63411621
Mark of a true plebective
It costs an arm and a leg to get ahead in life Ray. A head for two limbs? Who do you think's getting the better deal Ray?
>>63414260
>>63414642
>>63413866
>>63411945
Fuck.
>>63413945
well meme'd
Are these actual lines from the show???
>>63415533
Yes. Every single one of them.
>>63415533
Some were from cut scenes available only on Blu-Ray
Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, Ray. I'm the road, and nobody crosses me.
They say you're supposed to throw out expired milk. And that's what I feel like. But you know what Ray? I'm not even past my expiration date.
Life is like a pool without any water. Well Ray, when I jump in, I still make a splash.
They say all roads lead to Rome, Ray. Well i'm on the highway going in the wrong lane and i missed the last exit. Caspere knew this.
As far as I'm concerned, Fargo shat in Pizza's Lebrons.
We're all just stars in the night sky, and I'm the only guy who's got a telescope. Casper knew this.
They say that in the land of the blind, the one-eyed man is king. Well gues what, Ray. I am a fucking 3d glasses salesman.
Life is like a box of chocolates. Well mine is full of ones with nuts, and there's only one piece left.
My house was made of bricks. But you know what Ray? The wolf came and blew the fucking thing down anyway.
>>63411440
they say this meme is dead, Ray, and from my point of view, Casper knew this
Everybody's running a marathon to the same place. I'm the only one on a bicycle, and I'm riding it the other way. Casper knew this.
>>63415676
>>63415801
Jesus christ this has to be the most pretentious show ever
After Christmas, I don't just throw the tree out. I burn the whole fucking house to the ground. But you know what Ray? I get a new one every year.
Never lost any keys, never even had any fucking keychains.
>>63416167
>>63416041
>>63416127
>>63415920
>>63413866
>>63411945
kek
You ever been to a baby shower, Ray? I remember the first one I went to. Kept walking around asking everyone, "Where's the baby? Where's the baby?" They all looked at me like I was nuts. But you know, that's when I realized it, Ray. The baby? It was me, and I've still got a lot of growing up to do.
>>63416360
kek
>Retards still trying to force the Caspere knew this part
>>63415920
Underrated.
>>63416398
You know it, Caspere.
>>63416398
I think it's funny d e s u
They say life is like a box of chocolates, you'll never know what you're gonna get.
I ate the chocolate, Ray, I ate all the nougat bonbons. Turns out I'm fucking diabetic.
>>63416565
Lol'd
Paul Revere said one if by land, two if by sea Ray. Well I'm lighting them all up. It's time to go to war Ray.
>>63416398
I like how it showed up early on and was never even mentioned in the show. Casper knew this.
They say blood is thicker than water. Well guess what Ray, semen is even thicker, but that don't mean I'm gonna fuck my daughter. I meant to tell Caspere this one.
Someone once said there's no such thing as a free lunch. Good thing I own a fucking club, huh Ray?
A song once told me to don't stop believing Ray. I never have Ray. I'll hold onto that feeling.
"You know there's this cafe near my place. I've driven by that place every day for 20 years, never gone in once. Then one day I decide to and you know what I realize? It's a fucking hardware store"
>>63411440
How do you wake up dead?
They say a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush Ray. Well I've got it. I've got my hand right in my wife's bush Ray.
>>63417214
kekerino
Link to a video where he days Caspere knew this?
I see this city as a head of hair, and I'm the barber. Take off 10% here, 20% there. Mould it as I like.
But it turns out this fucking place was bald all along and has got a new wig. Well, it turns out I'm all outta scissors, Ray. So this time I'm bringing a blowtorch.
>>63416226
>>63416360
This killed my sides as soon as I started reading it kek
>>63417164
fuck me
You gotta be unpredictable in this world to survive, Ray. Just look at me. When life gives me lemons, I don't make lemonade. I make fucking orange juice.
They said an apple a day keeps the doctors away. But what if apples make you sick, Ray?
Never check the time with your watch. Something that close to you shouldn't change so often.
They say to keep your friends close, and your enemies closer Ray. My enemy is myself Ray. I've gone up my own ass.
I tried masterbating yesterday. All I got were tears.
Its like a game of poker, Ray, and right off the bat I drew my own ace of spades with nothin' but an old Denny's receipt and a fucking cray-on.
Give me your best Frankposting, /tv/.
I've missed it.
They say home is where you make it Ray. I've made it in my fucking shoes Ray.
>>63416963
Kek
>>63413866
Best one here fuck
>>63419528
>>63419872
>>63420035
Holy shit
>>63413866
10/10
>>63420035
>>63419528
Noice.
They always told me the pen is mightier than the sword. Well I ain't never heard of a fuckin' novelist killing King Arthur. Look at me now. I'm holding Excalibur with my own two hands. But I always remember to keep a pen in my pocket.
They say a broken clock is right twice a day. Well it's finally my fucking time Ray, and the ĉuckoo bird's coming out.
They say the early bird catches the worm, Ray. But guess what, this bird doesn't sleep, but neither do the worms and I'm all out of coffee. Casper knew this.
>>63419528
This one is so profound.
The game's about life points, and I got too many life points to lose.
What I'm tryna say Ray, is that I took your kids Yu-Gi-Oh cards, the fuckin' chump.
>>63421839
OP already used that saying
When I was young I'd do odd jobs here and there for pennies. Then when I became an adult I started hustling for real cash. Hundreds. Thousands. When you met me I was toppling people for real power. The kind not on green paper. Tentacular power that you didn't keep in a safe but in your sleeves. With money you can make all of them bow but with that power you can control their very minds. Maybe this is why I wanted to keep my jacket, not to lose those diamonds but also not to be sleeveless again.
When I last saw you I was limping like a pauper to reach you. When I died I was gasping for air thinking of us. The diamonds in my jacket felt as light as pennies.
All my life I've been bringing knives to gun fights, Ray. And now that I've got a gun? The whole world's switched back to knives.
They say an eye for an eye makes the whole world blind Ray. Well I'm fucking Daredevil, and it's time to gouge out everybody's eyes.
You know why we're here, Ray? we're here to kick ass and chew bubblegum and I'm all out of gum
>>63415920
The best so far
I never finished high school, but if there's one thing life's taught me, it's that money can buy class.
>>63411440
Why did Casper always get the worst lines?
>>63411945
kek
My father.. what can I tell you about my father, Ray? The belt was his favorite child development tool, the problem was he never worn any and I got no memory of being a child.
>a real Mexican standoff
Frank: Hey, Ray. You remember your first blowjob?
Ray: Oh, yeah.
Frank: How long did it take to Casper to come?
>>63423908
Kek.
they say you can judge a man by the nature of his hands. Well Ray, I've been looking at these fucking things for 40 years, and you know what I realized? They are fucking feet.
>>63424790
lol
An optimist sees this glass half full, and a realist sees it half empty.
Well Ray, it doesn't matter because we're in the fucking glass and someone turned it upside-down.
They say the actions mirror the soul, Ray. But how can mirrors be real when our eyes ain't real? Jaden knew this.
>>63425162
This one furrows the brow.
>>63425128
flawless.
They say breakfast is the most important meal of the day Ray. Well I don't break fast, they'll see.
more vince posts
>>63411440
anyone have the capped one about butter?
I heard the eyes are the window to the soul. If that's the case, I'd rather be wearing sunglasses my entire life.
more vinceposting
