What is your problem with Attack of the Clones? I just viewed it tonight and found it quite beautiful.
>>62712329
Mannequin Skywalker.
>>62712329
I wanted more Sheev scenes, Obi-Wan actually doing interesting shit, and a cool new villain played by Christopher Lee, but instead I got 2 hours of an underwhelming plot and cringeworthy love scenes.
>>62712329
> I don't like sand, it's coarse and it gets everywhere
>kills sand people
>pottery
Aside from that it's still pretty mediocre. Episode III was great though
I like the last act of Episode II, also Episode III's
>>62712329
Goddam every actor looks like they hate their place in this poster.
>>62712329
What are you a fucking queer?
>>62712381
episode III was better than episode VI
It was lol how Padme supposedly didn't want the romance to happen at first but kept going on secluded picnics with him and dressing in clothing that looked like it was about to fall off. she wanted it badder than he did, the dirty little minx.
>>62712329
Isey, I think you've had enough 4chan 4 today
>>62712329
I think so too, OP.
AOTC is imo best Star Wars. I know I'm supposed to say ESB is, and prequels are shit and whatnot, but to me AOTC is just, so perfect.
Attack of The PS2 level CGI and Green screen
>>62712381
>>62712329
>What is your problem with Attack of the Clones?
Anakin is painfully beta and clingy, the sudden love story looks forced. The rest wasn't that bad, I loved the coruscant parts and based detective Obi-Wan.
I prefered episode 1
>>62712329
o rly now
>>62712454
The tried spinning. It was a good trick.
rewatched it in a /tv/ stream recently
Holy shit it's so god damn boring
Seriously, most boring movie ever. I forgot how dull it was. Nothing happens, the chat was dead with 30 viewers because literally nothing of interest happens. Not even any dank memes like in 1 or 3
>>62712483
i can't fucking believe padme chose sand guy over based ewan
i don't like sand
The prequels are perhaps the most underrated movies of all time.
>>62712329
the thing that is really driving me crazy in OPs post is that its not even the real dvd cover
It used to be my favorite prequel as a kid
I rewatched it again and realized I considered it my favorite because I would always skip everything between the beginning to jango vs obi wan and then skip right to arena afterwards
If you were born before 1990, hating the prequels in whiny manchild tier
If you were born after 1990, hating the prequels is Reddit tier
This is official
x__ME______________
this is not wizard
Watch out for that vicious bounty hunter Boba Fett, Luke. Did I ever tell you I fought his dad? He was hired to assassinate a senator me and your father were guarding. We kept bringing her around open windows and public areas in order to draw the would-be assassin out because we knew he had too much pride to just shoot her from long range. He had used his payment to hire another bounty hunter to kill the senator for him while he sent us on a wild bantha chase. Also the 2nd assassin used her payment to buy a robot to assassinate the senator for her. Did I mention the 2nd assassin was a shapeshifter? She could have been a good friend in disguise and just shot the senator for all we knew! Then the robot used its payment to buy poisonous bugs to release into the senator's room while she slept after lasering a hole through the window. It could have just lasered her too after that because we we weren't watching her at all, but it already bought the bugs. So we sense the hostile life forms (not the robot) in the room and rush in and save the senator in the nick of time! Then I jumped out the window to chase the robot back to its owner! Luckily it didn't have a self-destruct function. Then we found the 2nd assassin and chased her across the planet, and caught her when she tried to kill us instead of shapeshifting and escaping. But to our surprise, Jango Fett was watching the whole thing instead of going to kill the senator while we were away chasing the bugs chasing the robot chasing the shapeshifter. He shot her with a poisonous dart instead of sniper blaster, and only her instead of shooting all of us or blowing all of us with a rocket or something, then he escaped with his tiny jetpack. Luckily for the senator, my good friend Dexterr Jettster owned a 50s dinner on Courscant that had Republic secrets on the menu along with cheeseburgers and malt shakes. We found the assassin and Mace Window killed him later, right in front of Boba. And he was a good friend.
If Anakin was able to fight better with dual lightsabers, why doesn't he always carry two?
>>62712329
possibly the worst flick of all time
Reminder that Lucas re-edited the Dooku fight at the end to make it even worse for the DVD release for no conceivable reason.
>>62712883
what did he change?
>>62712844
More like this
>>62712912
I'll try to find the link (there's a DVD review website where they went through every single change made to all 6 movies) but basically he moved around some reaction shots to make it seem like Yoda is just standing around doing nothing while Dooku gets away.
>>62712883
>>62712938
http://www.dvdactive.com/editorial/articles/star-wars-the-changes-part-four.html
I found it quite beautiful too.
>>62712435
>a woman acting like she doesn't want the D but secretly does
STOP. THE. PRESSES.
>>62712376
>cringeworthy love scenes
this
>>62712844
You forgot about the Death Sticks
>Luke, did I ever tell you how I slept with your mother multiple times while turning her against your father? He was a good friend.
>>62712451
>Attack of The PS2
They were at least PS3
Mediocre. Only thing decent about it was Padme's white outfit at the end, and Mullet-Wan's detective arc. The romance arc had such shit dialogue.
>>62712329
fucking hell OP. props for good b8
watched it last week and it was far more awful than I remembered. The only saving grace was the CGI sequences. that's pretty sad.
>>62712452
>"agony"
>blue balls
>>62712844
:^)
>>62712329
>the wooden dialogue doesn't help
>so much green screening its an eyesore
>CGI aged horrifically
>one of the worst romances in a mainstream movie, absolutely nothing is believable about it
>nonsensical mystery plot with a shitload of plot holes or scenes that are just plain unnecessary
>worst lightsaber duels in the entire series
>>62712986
Hershlag eyecandy was the only positive thing about AotC. The film is fucking trash.
yoda vs dooku force battle was awful
>>62712376
>cringeowrthy
How old were you when you first saw this?
>>62712329
gave us jango. better than boba other than jobbing to windu
>>62712844
kek
>>62713440
You can't honestly believe that
K cunts Attack of the Clones for reals.
http://www.hitbox.tv/Sheev66
>awful nonsensical forced romance
>instead of being portrayed as a noble jedi who falls to the dark side, Anakin was just a whiny little bitch from the start
>Dooku had potential but ended up being boring and pointless (could have been morally grey but we can't have that in Star Wars because Lucas)
>Yoda's character was ruined (now he has a tiny lightsaber and starts wars at the drop of a hat, what happened to "wars not make one great"?)
>Jar Jar continued to be the key to all this and basically caused the Empire through pure stupidity
>plot holes and dumb characterization everywhere
>clones vs droids means there's no stakes at all, no reason to give a shit about the war
>absurd amount of CGI, almost every single scene has green screen everywhere, everything looks fake
>poorly shot in general
>terrible dialogue and acting
>awful pacing
>not enough Sheev scenes
>>62712844
>Then the robot used its payment
I broke right here
God damn
>>62713569
wew it's happening
>>62713514
I do, only good part of the movie. Maybe Im biased from playing the Bounty Hunter game but at least he was actually a character instead of a faceless plot device.
>>62713569
madman!
>>62713514
Not that guy but Boba was not a very good character. He basically followed Han around in Empire and then got laughably killed off in Return. At least Jango actually did things and went down fighting (even though hiring to use a robot who drops poisonous bugs through a window was a really really dumb assassination plan).
People only remember Boba for the design. His first appearance was in the Christmas Special for fuck's sake.
cmon lads watch this shit show
http://www.hitbox.tv/Sheev66
Watching this is making me realize that Attack of Clones has a way more boring opening than The Phantom Menace. At least Phantom eventually gets to the action and the droidekas are pretty cool, Clones has one explosion and then lots of boring talking (including Anakin's obnoxious whining and fucking Jar Jar).
I want to have sex with Natalie Portman
Obi van looks like jesus on that cover
>>62713738
Most of the movie is boring. It's best watched drunk with friends.
>>62713715
Fuck, I really don't want to have to sign up to shitpost with you guys.
Tell me about Gregar, why does he wear the eyepatch?
>>62713769
do it, it's fun.
>>62714013
Looks like Star Trek
did the sand people rape vader's mom?
>>62712774
>The prequels are more underrated than Suckerpunch
>this guy was Padme's first fuck
>>62714142
Do you think they experimented with eachother, like making out and stuff?
>>62714013
this guy did play school here in Australia, and has the same name as me
>>62712374
Nice
>>62713229
The green screening looks like a fucking psykids movie.
>photoshop tier greenscreen animations
>>62712329
It's a lot easier and quicker to list the positives than the negatives.
>standard Williams score of perfection
>Christopher Lee as Dooku
>the fight scene on Kamino between Obi-Wan and Jango
>The reveal of the Jedi on Geonosis before the fighting starts
>That one line with the death sticks
Everything else was crap. I may have forgotten one or two minor decent bits. If I have, remind me.
>>62712413
Niggah, what the FUCK did you just say?
>>62714423
A true fact.
>>62714282
Your name is Gregar Typho? Sorry to hear that.
>>62714329
>psykids
i want to see this
>>62712329
George, please go
>>62712329
Of course that's your contention. You're a first-year film student; you just got finished watching some nouvelle vague cinema, Jacques Rivette probably. You're gonna be convinced of that 'till next month when you get to Godard's maoist period. Then you're going to be talking about how Truffaut's shamelessly became petit bourgeois after the 60's. That's gonna last until next year; you're gonna be in here regurgitating André Bazin, talkin' about, you know, caméra-stylo and mise-en-scène.
"Is every shot a manifestation of God"? You got that from Cahiers du Cinéma n° 97, page 98, right? Yeah, I read that too. Were you gonna plagiarize the whole thing for us? Do you have any thoughts of your own on this matter? Or do you, is that your thing, you come on 4chan, quote some obscure opinion and then pretend - you pawn it off as your own, as your own idea just to impress some virgins, embarrass my tripfriends? See, the sad thing about a guy like you is, in 50 years you're gonna start doin' some thinkin' on your own and you're going to come up with the fact that there are two certainties in life: one, don't do that, and two, you dropped 150 grand on a fuckin' education you could have got for a low ratio warning on karagarga.
>>62714233
i need an expand dong edit of him
It was an excellent toy commercial
>>62714588
Will you be my condescending gf?
>>62714258
Definitely. Think about how weird masturbation is for them, too. Can it really be called masturbation if it requires two people and gets two people off though?
>>62714630
so if I asked you about film, you'd probably give me the skinny on every cinema book ever written. Storaro, you know a lot about him. Life's work, political aspirations, him and the thespians, sexual orientations, the whole works, right? But I'll bet you can't tell me what it smells like on the set. You've never actually stood there and seen cuts and retakes. If I ask you about italian futurism, you'd probably give me a syllabus about your personal favorites. You may have seen a few of them a couple of times. But you can't tell me what it feels like to be a part of the time, to live during the movement, and feel what the films conveyed. You're a tough kid. And I'd ask you about war, you'd probably throw Pontecorvo and La battalia de Algeri at me, right, "demonstrating a false humanitarianism only leads to ridiculousness and impotence." But you've never been affected by one. You've never held a film to a high regard because it affected you on a personal level. I'd ask you about romantica, you'd probably quote me Michael Cortiz. But you presume to know everything about film because you saw a few movies, and you ripped /tv/ apart. You're a plebeian right?
Also, do you mind if I have a penis?
>>62714663
Is it a cute penis?
>DUDE PLINKETT LMAOBut seriously tho, this is the truth.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hz1L63TdhC8
>>62714706
You know, I'd actually sit through one of his reviews if he took it more seriously.
50's era diner etc etc
>>62714657
Would it be considered mutual masturbation?
>>62714687
I don't fuck with off by one clowns. Step your dub game up faggot
>>62714746
Aww.
>>62712329
It's the worst fucking prequel ever.
All the problems Lucas had with The Phantom Menace should've been fixed with Attack Of The Clones, but somehow it ended up being worse than that. Not to mention Hayden Christensen's shitty acting and the dated CGI really fuck things up.
DELLOW FELEGATES
>>62712329
>that fucking rattail
>>62714756
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHhHHhzhzhHHHHhHHHaaayyyyyylmaayylmaoayylmaoayylmaoayylmao
>sees dude carry his dead mom home
>"What's wrong Anakin?"
>>62714792
Um?
>>62714806
I laughed out loud in the theater at that part.
>>62714871
What's the problem?
>>62713226
>being a nigger
>>62714013
>Punished Reggie
>>62712329
>not watching Star Wars with /tv/
www.hitbox.tv/Sheev66
>>62712413
well meme'd
>>62712329
The dialogue. The CGI hasn't aged well either but I can totally overlook that. I still get drawn into the locations though. Say what you want about Lucas but he crafted an interesting science fantasy world.
>rewatch AotC
>realize Anakin is the Jedi version of Elliot Rodger
I love it now. Just think that Elliot is the actor, not Hans Neveractagain
>>62714588
Camera stylo is from astruc, not bazin you little fuccboi
>>62712329
You could write a book on what's wrong with it as a movie. It's pretty, sure, but it's just atrocious as a film.
>>62712329
That montage is so awkward, it's bugging the fuck out of me. Like Qui Gon is just standing there trying to think of something to do WHY AREN'T YOU DOING SOMETHING OR DISPLAYING AN EMOTION FUCK
>>62715568
you must mean that he hired the right production designers because that's where his contributions end
>>62712329
No exaggeration, I literally couldn't remember a single thing about this movie aside from Yoda having a lightsaber until the plinkett review came out. My brain wiped that shit right out of my subconscious.
I thought the separatist army was pretty interestingI wish they went into it more instead of showing some shitty love scene.
One of the biggest problems with the prequels is that it doesn't have a set villain. We all know Sheev is running shit but below him there is no one to call the main villain, just people who are waiting to die.
>>62712329
Romance plot was shit
Who the fuck is Master Syfodias?
The clones plot had many gaps in it and so much shit unanswered.
>>62713582
>>awful nonsensical forced romance
Than how do you explain Luke and Leia Einstein. Your dad never taugh you where babies come from?
>>instead of being portrayed as a noble jedi who falls to the dark side, Anakin was just a whiny little bitch from the start
No one ever said Vader before was noble jedi who falls to the dark side. He wasn't suited for being Jedi, his connection with mother was too strong and his romance with Padme was just sentiment for his mother.
>>Yoda's character was ruined (now he has a tiny lightsaber and starts wars at the drop of a hat, what happened to "wars not make one great"?)
Doesn't mean he's just a fatass who sits in the tower all of his life. Yoda was a powerful Jedi and knows for to defend himself. If you expect him sitting in one place when shit start falling apart you're delusional cringeworthy kid.
>>plot holes and dumb characterization everywhere
Easily said the same about every part of old trilogy.
I think Attack of the Clones is the worst movie I've ever seen.
I like Phantom Menace too.
>>62712329
Baka senpai...
I hate sand
>>62719257
>mfw he's on the higher ground
>>62712329
I legitimately love AOTC.
Sure it's far from perfect but I actually find it entertaining.
>>62712374
Pretty good
>>62714142
Suckerpunch was horrible. Made my gf turn it off.
pic related was the best part
>>62712860
I never understood that. Whenever there's a fight and there's a spare lightsabre they always pick it up, like it would help them. If that's so then why don't they have 2 lightsabres on them at all times instead of 1
>>62720185
I agree.
>most of the movie is not only storywise but visually boring
>easily has the worst effects of any of the SW movies, practical and CGI
>an even more unnecessarily complicated story made even more confusing by how badly its delivered to the audience
>no real villain other than some random ass bounty hunters for pretty much the 1st 2/3rds of the movie
>everything on naboo is just fucking awful, some of the worst writing in the saga
>>62720185
Is Aayla-posting the new /tv/ meme?
I like it.
>>62712329
I like Attack of the Clones. it's five B-movies rolling at the same time, some work and some doesn't
>A romance movie
>A detective movie
>A revenge movie
>A rescue movie
>A war movie
3 of 5, not bad at all
>>62712446
Fuck off Nohie
Its entertaining when your expectations aren't high going in. I was never really a Star Wars fan so that probably helped.
>>62712329
D R O P P E D
>>62720614
I don't care, I'd still to insane things to her sexually
I really REALLY want to FUCK NatNat in that tight white outfit
>>62712329
>"I BOUGHT HER AND WE FELL IN LOVE!"
>"I COULDN'T GO LOOKING FOR HER WHILE HOLDING A RIFLE ON MY HOVER-CHAIR BECAUSE OF MY LEG AN' SHIT!"
>"I KILLED ALL THE KIDS CUZ I WAS ANGRY AN' SHIT!"
>"THAT'S OK ANNIE! YOU WERE ANGRY AN' SHIT!"
>*hugs*
>the same button on the shuttle that's used for charting courses is also used to open up commmunications channels
>that terrible flat acting
>that blatant CGI overkill
>"HI ANNIE! LONG TIME NO SEE!"
>"I IS ANGRY AN' SHIT BECAUSE OBI-WAN TREATS ME LIKE A STUDENT WHEN I AM TOTALLY SUPER-STRONG!"
>THAT'S NICE! I SEE YOU'VE GROWN UP AND GOTTEN BIGGER!"
>changelings
>"SOME JEDI WE'LL NEVER SHOW ORDERED A FUCKING ARMY YEARS AGO FOR NO FUCKING REASON AT ALL WHEN CONSIDERING ALL WAS PEACEFUL THEN! AND OUT OF NOWHERE WE'LL HAVE FUCKLOADS OF SHIPS READY FOR THEM TOO!"
>"I CAN'T WALK ONE FOOT WITHOUT MY FUCKING CANE BUT WATCH ME GO DETROIT NIGGA ALL OVER YOUR ASS, DOOKU!"
"MY GUNS AREN'T WORKING TO STOP THIS BLACK GUY! LETTING HIM GET CLOSER WHILE SHOOTING AT HIM WILL SURELY STOP HIM!"
>>62712329
I think the way they portrayed Anakin in this and the third one was really well done. You can really imagine this guy growing up to be Vader
>>62712376
>That scene where Padme tells Anakin about her first kiss or first love or something
C
U
C
K
E
D
>>62712381
>tfw he'll never single handedly slaughter all the sand people in Europe
Why even live?
>>62712381
After watching 1,2, and then 3, it's like why did they save all the good shit for the 3rd movie? It's not even close
>>62720159
Shit taste
>>62719257
Obi a cute. Cute
>>62714713
He tried doing that at first, but he thought it was incredibly dull to watch.
