Your party is confronted by a dire pelican.
I roll to seduce it.
Rolled 5 (1d20)
>>47657991
Fucking roll then.
>>47658000
You succeed.
Not because you're seductive, it just has really low standards.
>>47658062
honestly, anyone making the effort of trying is enough for the dire pelican. even a failure would've succeeded. it's just so goddamn lonely.
>>47658105
>it's just so goddamn lonely.
*all around us a familiar places...*
We fucking run.
>>47658404
>>47657991
Bestiality is bannable, you know.
Rolled 2, 6, 1, 6, 6, 5, 3, 4 = 33 (8d6)
I cast Fireball. Dinner time!
>other player: "watch out! That things beak is large enough to swallow you whole!"
>me, sweating profusely, trying hard to hide erection: "you guys go on with out me... I'll hold him off"
>>47658187
Now you made this thread depressing.
Good job.
>>47660790
That's disgusting. You're a sick fuck, anon. How dare you disrespect us so poorly as to think we would leave you behind.
We will fight with you to the very end, anon. Even though your palms are too sweaty to hold your weapon correctly, we will stand behind you and hold it with you because that's the kind of team we are.
>>47660836
The fuck? Pelicans would eat babies given the chance. Thats a scowl of evil.
>>47660864
Hey now, please form a orderly line on the way to you're doom. Keep your hands and feet inside the ride until its conclusion.
>>47660767
Your fireball explodes on the magical bird with a fiery globe of fire. However before there's time for the smoke to go away the pelican emerges, slightly burned but still quite healthy. He looks reallly pissed off and he's looking at you.
He jumps straight to you and tries to bite you.
>>47661032
forgot to roll
>>47660963
No, pelicans are purely good beings. They prevent the world from the destorying itself due to overpopulation caused by evil storks.
Rolled 16 (1d20)
>>47661052
fucking mobile
>>47657904
Is the dire pelican carrying a dire cod in its dire beak? Because my dire need to dire feed, means twice the dire meat
>>47661071
I can hear music playing to this text.
>>47657904
What is this, a dire pelican for Dire Ants?
>>47661083
Dire music
>"Gods, we can't land a hit on it, it's too fast!"
>"Get out of the way, it's coming right at you!"
>>47661071
10/10 would hire as party bard
>>47661068
I scream, crouch and cover my goddamn face
>I have a vore fetish
This gun be gud
>>47657904
>forgeting pelicans are bros
>>47658715
Fucking snitch
>>47662899
Pelicans: Not even once.