Well... we successfully diverted the course of the space hulk...
...with us inside of it. Now what?
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1d4Chan: https://1d4chan.org/wiki/Campaign:Penal_regiment_designation_/tg/
Steam Group: http://steamcommunity.com/groups/40k_penal_regiment.
FAQ:
>What the fuck is this?
Somewhat a campaign of crack-infused free-form roleplay in the grim darkness of the far future.
>When do you guys make these threads?
Usually mondays at 4PM GMT, but they sometimes extend to Tuesdays if we got caught in the middle of something when the thread died and it was too late to make another one the same day.
>Can I join in?
Sure, just think of a character and have fun, you can find most info in 1d4chan albeit it's ussually a little bit out of date in comparison to where the threads are.
>Is there any requirement in character creation.
Not really, we've had Xeno infiltrators, Chaos infiltrators, Villains, Heroes, Normal Guardsmen, Crazed Guardsmen, Assassins, Psykers, Space Marines, Inquisitors, Squats... just think whathever and join the fun.
>Is it allowed to have more than a single character?
Yes as long as you don't use it to powerplay.
>So how you guys do the playan'?
We tend to use spoilers for OOC chat, but nothing is set in stone.
We tend to use greentexts for describing a character's actions, but again nothing is set in stone.
Use d20s for combat checks and d100s for other things you want to roll, higher Is better.
It's important to know that the regiment is now in the employ of a radical Ordo Xenos Inquisitor, with influence from an Ordo Malleus Inquisitor and under the watch of an Ordo Hereticus Inquisitor. Yes we've been through a lot of shit.
are we still on the spess hulk?
>>47644328I live!!
>>47644401>...with us inside of it. Now what?
>>47644432W-Who lives? Also get in group chat on Stem.
>>47644448First post back and I still fucked it up...
>>47644460welcome back to the madness
>on vox
alright lads listun up I gots newz
>>47644478Good to be back. Now I have no idea how to enter the Steam group chat.
>Is mingling with the group, not saying a word.Will probably not participate all that much.
>>47644460welcome back
>>47644487
Yea? Should we krump dem humies first or afta da newz, Kaptin?
>>47644493In the steam group, from the steam computer app (mobile version and internet browser can't) at the right side of the group page
>>47644493On the group page, hit the button that says "Enter Chat Room". It'll open your Steam Client if it's not already open and bam, it'll put you in.
>>47644511UUGGHHH... I gotta install Steam... again
>>47644503
ladz we ain't krumpin these ummies, we'z headin for da eye of terra!
>grins
'oo wants ta steal some spiky shiney fings from da chaoz ladz!?
>>47644328
>Still nursing a headache
>>47644554
Okay boss! O.R.K. Hulky needz spikey bitz almost as much as dakka, methinks.
>meanwhile
What's that sir? They've cleared a Space Hulk and you kept me here doing this groxshit?! You bastard! Alright alright calm your armored tits. I'll take care of this one last thing and then I'm going back. Better not try and stop me...Had to go on an unforeseen road trip to Fayetteville yesterday. Heading home now, so I'll be back with yall in about 3 or 4 hours.
>Meanwhile, at the same time in a Sector a couple of Segmentae away.....
>Alice is grabbing the last of her equipment prior to boarding the Cruiser headed for the Calixis Sector.
>She assumes the rest of her retinue and her associates on Praetoria are doing likewise.
>>47644640
I'm impatient to meet this inquisitor again... I can't remember his face.
...
I never forget a face...
>he's just mooching about and looking for the Eldar he heard talking earlier.
>>47644640
I must say... That ship we found was very intriguing, and an important find for the Imperium. I believe we should Return to make further investigations at a later date.
>>47644666
Well, you better get a good look at his face while it's intact. Because I'm gonna take a metal pipe or two to it.
>>47644684
Indeed, it will be fortunate if we can ask the Crew what happened. The logs can only tell us so much.....
>Alice appears to have chosen a Cadian 'disguise' for the the assignment, with weapons and equipment to match.
I would suggest both of you fetch some Cadian equipment. We don't want to let our quarry know that he's marked for death until we've got him in binders, eh?
>>47644728
I agree. I'll be ready to go when you order, ma'am.
And...
...save some of his face for me, will you? He used me... I kind of want to make him pay for what he did to me.
>>47644728
Certainly.
>goes look for the armoury
>>47644673
>The voice repeats itself periodically
>It seems to be coming from outside the ship
>>47644786
>searches for a window to look out of.
>is also confused by how sound can travel through space.
>paces and looks over the drop troops
Alright men. Find the vehicle bay. Maybe we can nab some good tech. The Techpriests are with us in this.
>>47644799
Larrs, any plan on how to get us back to our ship before...
>>47644554
We enter hell in reality?
>>47644747
As long as we don't do any -permanent- damage it'll be fine. Now, you'd better go along and grab your gear as well.
>>47644765
Go straight at the next two junctions then it's the first left! Quartermaster'll let you have whatever! Uh......Make sure it's marked.....uh.....412th!
>>47644808
Doubtful, sir. The orks have infested this place from left to right, they've tampered with most machinery.
>>47644799
>You can only see the frozen planet you are drifting away form and distant stars
>You realize the voice is a psychic message
>It is inside your head, but you know the direction where the "place that should be shunned" is centered
>>47644808
>over vox
Jackson, again at it? You can't loot an orks' space hulk!
>>47644830
412th, huh? Somebody's a fan of Lorn V's campaign it seems.
>She gives a smile as she goes to preppare herself
>>47644824
>is about to respond when
>>47644848
>he realises what is going on and he falls silent, no quips, no insults he just looks out into the ccold darkness.
no...
>>47644875
Such a shame...
>>47644852
I have to agree with the chief here, sir.
We'd better just find a way back to the penance before we strand too far. Maybe there are some teleporters somewhere?
>>47644837
Well, thanks to da lootin´, we´z got a lil´ sumfin´ no other orkz have!
>Pulls a small tube with a button on it out of a pocket
I made it meself. Considerin´ da new Kaptin doesn´t want to krump ya, you´ll need one.
>>47644852
Honey. Orks love to loot, soooo they'll have good loot.Loot that the Techpriests want.
>>47644837
I found this sir,
>hands him a perfectly good blender.
not sure if the techpriests will use it thou
>moves off to play to himself
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1jg8jf9oTjw
>>47644888
I know I'll regret to ask this but... what does it do?
>>47644901
A blender...
...well if we get stranded we'll always be able to blend those who die of starvation.
>>47644892
Don't "Honey" me, Jackson, you are supposed to come back on board as soon as the direction of the Hulk has been altered, no ifs or buts.
>>47644902
It´z a lokalizzed tellyporta! Need to get ported? it will do that. It even knows if you are inside a wall and getz ya out of it! Also useful in fixing da more kommon problemz with da bigger tellyportaz. Like, tellyportin´ yiz insides on da outside.
>>47644929
But Honey. I like calling you Honey.
When are the dropships coming to get us?
>Is readjusting her helmet and is still uncharacteristically silent. Her legs seem to be a little off.
>>47644949
As soon as you tell me everything is done. And not that I don't enjoy bullying the techpriests and bossing around the pilots, but you are taking your sweet time there, eh.
>>47644947
hm...
>>47644567
Trooper Boer? Could you come over here a second?
>>47644855
>Alice says nothing immediately, instead waiting for LIX to head off before muttering "There was nothing to like about that Campaign....."
>sighs and boards the 'Hawk taking them to the Cruiser.
>>47644925
>Salutes Corporal
Corporal,, good to see you alive. Perimeter's secure. Or as secure as you can get on a greenskin infested hulk.
>>47644994
>Also boards the hawk some time later.
>>47645010
Excellent job trooper.
I have a mission for you. Test this >>47644947
possibly suicidal teleporting invention while I go deal with a way too obvious problem.
>Once that is said, he casually throws the machine into Boer's hands.
>>47644957
Hawthorn!
>>47644994
>>47645014
>Boards the hawk with a new set of armour on him
>>47644976
But Sweety. There is so much fun stuff here. Besides if you join me in searching then I'll let you boss me around in our room.
Rolled 58 (1d100)
>>47645027
>Catches it.
>Rolling to inspect
>>47645050
Uhmm, Corporal? Isn't this heretek?
>>47645027
>Turns to you and nods. Seems to become sligthly worried and scratches her helmet.
>>47645014
>>47645028
>With everyone on board the Thunderhawk takes off and is soon onboard the Cruiser.
>Said Cruiser also heads away from the Planet before entering the Warp. It has begun.
So.....you didn't actually tell the 'others' where our target Inquisitor is, right?
>A vessel loaded with troops and equipment also enters the Warp, headed for a different part of the Calixis Sector.
>>47645042
Well thank you very much for the offer, a pity that I have half the staff Greely left me babysitting me all the time and pretending I don't take part in the actions because "a throne agent and future teller of your caliber shouldn't throw her life away so easily and must stay where she can be more useful to the Imperium". Bullshit.
>>47645086
>nods at her as she walks past
you find anything good Sam?
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VZ6O7Jk4MXs
>>47645114
>patrol group Hephaestus follows the cruiser
>>47645074
Probably, but it might also be our only means back home.
>>47645086
>Crosses his arms.
It's bad I know about your origins and haven't killed you already but it's even worse you're just plain out showing them around!
>Does he know it's not actually Samantha in there?
This is a penal regiment with a bad uniform policy, lady, but still with an uniform policy!
For a Xeno infiltrator you're doing a very poor job! Even the Ork and the Eldar got the clothing right! And your armor is promoting the concept of us being alligned to some greater weeaboo goodness or however the Blueberries call it! I want you to ditch that heresy you're wearing and get some human-made clothing, is that understood?!
And fucks sake eat something with more vitamins your legs are so thin they look like a Leman Russ ran over them!
>Probably not.
Rolled 94 (1d100)
>>47645181
Well, it's been an honor working with you, Corporal.
>Presses thingamajig.
>>47645216
Emperor Speed you magnificient bastard.
>Salutes and is actually hoping this ends right.
>>47644554
"Interrogator! The hulk! They're heading.. no, that's not right. That would take them a long time but they'd end up right in the eye!"
"It's our only lead on Theta Gamma's location. I know this ship isn't in top shape, but we can intercept a thronedamn space hulk!"
>The captain rubs her scar nervously.
"Prepare to cross it's path, starboard side. Ready the working grapnel cannons, and have the astropath try and contact them. Hopefully someone on the hulk will hear us."
>>47645126
Babe? Why don't you just order them to stop following you?
>>47645264
"dis is Kaptin Mozgul Shin Breaka also known as Bob, I hear ya"
"what ya want be doin?"
>>47645141
>Shakes her head and points towards a corridor as if to say "I looked there."
>>47645181
>Nods and takes a few steps back. Seems to become increasingly worried.
>Is now on the lookout for full body armor and a place to change.
>>47645304
>taps her on the shoulder
you ain't talking? Eisen got your tongue?
>>47645114
To the others? They may have overheard the subsector. But the world is still confidential to all but you. The Inquisitor is, after all, a heretic of Chaotic nature.
>>47645216Holy fking hell, I almost expected to ice Soap.
>Disappears in a reddish flash. Reappears in another part of the Space Hulk.
Cough...cough...I...I'm alive! Thank the God-Emperor.
>Hails on voxcom
This is Trooper "Soap" Boer hailing. Corporal, I think I made it. Not off the Hulk... But I think I've found us a way off this Hulk.
>>47645290
Because they take orders from Greely. Fuck, if only that bastard shows up...
>>47645324
Trooper, do you hear me?
Going by the scans we have there should be a large bay not far off to your right. Can you get all the regiment there?
>>47645324
Excellent news trooper! Where are you at?!
>>47645297
>Noises begin eminating from somewhere in a nearby weirdboy, possibly the spleen
"Bob? Do you know where the rest of Theta Gamma has gotten to?"
>>47645323
Thank the Emperor for small mercies. Well....the Navigator tells me that the Warp is almost worryingly calm, we should be arriving......now actually.
>And just like that, the Cruiser exits the Warp.
Alright, what's our heading Callidon? I'm eager to slap this traitor in irons.
>>47645324Only Vostroyans named after Pre-Crusade Vostroyan Stub Pistols can kill Soap.
>>47645337
me gitfinda says near da big tellyporta. Dat´z how you´ll get off da ship. Dat little fing ain´t got da WAAAAGH-power to take ya off da ship. But you can hit da button ´till yiz insides are on da inside.
>>47645351
"rest of da boys are making there way to a hanger mate, I'm staying with da orkz thou, I got me own crew now"
>>47645372
I could try to infiltate his hideout as one of them.
We could also use the regiment being this close as an advantadge, either as a distraction, assign them to attack some heretics here without telling them many details or either by using a cadian disguise and say we stranded off by accident.
>>47645383
Emperor preserve me...
>>47645319
>Shows him some sort of human medicine for the throath.
>Written on there in low gothic are the portions to take and when. Seems to be half empty and was apparently used two hours ago in the middle of the figth with the orks.
>>47645441
>raises an eybrow before shrugging and making his way to the hanger.
>>47645335
>>47645337
>Gropes around a fuse box.
Yeah, Anna. I'm...Got it ya fraking bastard...lighting up the hanger bay...
>Hanger bay lights up. Two pristine ships cover in millennia of grime and dust. A partial XVI LXIII shows across their hulls.
And I think the Ell-tee would want to see this.
>>47645372
St. Astrid´s Fall. A frontier world, moon orbiting the gas giant Sekmet.
>>47645397
"Well, that's good to hear."
>The weirdboy burbles
>Meanwhile, away from the astropath
"Interrogator, we can capture the hulk and eradicate the xeno scum in relatively short or-"
"No."
"Sir?"
"I said "no," Captain. He's taking his crew right into the Eye of Terror, as you noted earlier."
"Maybe there's something we don't know about along the way?"
"Then we'll deal with that if and when it happens. Hard pre-emption is best reserved for certainties."
>>47645433
It´z fine. Da boyz have said da survival rate skyrokkited with da lokalizzed tellyporta.
>>47645487
What did you find, trooper?
>>47645532
"guna miss ya boyz"
>turns to the WrydBoy
what's up Grog?
>>47645456
>Follows Mot discretly to the hangar. and begins looking for the tellyporta.
>>47645544
Just for the record. What is the actual survival rate?
>>47645549
"Good hunting, Bob."
>You realize the human's astropathic communications have been coming out of the weirdboy's internal organs, which hasn't caused him to explode.
"I got that weird humie taste in me brain, boss."
>>47645549
Da WAAAGH be pulsatin´, Kaptin. Me brainz be already jigglin´ from it, see?
>>47645566
Afta da use of da lokalizzed tellypora... Only da boyz dat get inztantly zogged ´ave died. About 90 pershunt of da boyz live.
>>47645422
The 'off course' excuse is the one we were thinking of going for. We'll make it so.
>>47645508
Very well, we'll head for the planet now. Should be there before too long.
>The ship heads in the direction of St. Astrid's Fall.
Meanwhile, what can you tell us of the forces this Heretic has at his command?
I need a SitRep ASAP Thanks
>Dmitry is present
>In body at least
>Not necessarily in mind
>The good major and his men reek of old vodka and promethium
>And most likely feces aswell
>Not necessarily their own feces
>Regardless they're present, somewhere, how aware they are of the situation is questionable, and how aware they are of themselves is also questionable
>>47645547
Well, Anna.
>Wipes grime away from a small section of the hull
They look like a fat Thunderbird... And it's in high Gothic.
>Squinting heavily at the words, trying to remember half-forgotten lessons by Sister Amicia in the Schola Progenium
Says...Loo..Nuah...Wooo...ives. Loo Nuah Woo ives. Does that make sense to you?
>>47645583
>>47645584
right...
>turns on the shipwide coms
LISTEN UP LADS WHEN DEEZ UMMIES LEAVE WERE GOIN TO DA EYE OF TERRA WHERE I KAN KONFIRM THERE'S GUNNA BE LOOTIN AND FOIGHTIN FOR BLOODY LONG TIME SO I WANT YOU TA GIT READY YA HEAR?
>Bobs hits at random switches until he finds music.
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y5dQOYe6yRY
das betta.
>>47645611
He has his most controllable experiments protecting him. Some servitors outfitted with heavy weaponry, most likely his Maltek assassins and some servants, some of which are most likely hereteks.
>>47645622
Loo-nah Woo... Lu-na...
...
Trooper?
First, call me Anna again and I am going to have you thrown out of an airlock.
Second, get away from there as quickly as you can.
>>47645610
That would be recomforting if a 10% of "boyz" didn't mean about 10.000 different greenskins.
>>47645627
>the crew cheerfully WAAAGHs and krumps a few of the grots
>Then get back to work
>Has reached the tellyporta and begins to try and type something.
>Mutters a few curse words in tau, before getting ready to get out of the hulk.
going AFK for about an hour
Rolled 2 (1d100)
>>47645664
Sorry, A,..sir. Uh,,,
>Backs away slowly from ships
Should I be worried
>Rolling for awareness
>>47645667
Ehh... da krew ain´t that big, sadly. Da number o´ ded boyz iz closer to just 700.
>>47645651
That could pose a problem. Do you think three Leman Russes and a Company worth of disguised Stormtroopers could tie up his forces while locate the target?
>>47645724
I do believe the Leman Russes alone could level down all his forces besides the assassins.
>>47645718
YOU SHOULD.
Touch those things and you will be executed before you can even say "Heresy"!
>>47645737
Hrmh.....don't want to have him running away. What about one Russ and a Platoon of Stormtroopers then?
>>47645721
Well... might as well give it a try myself if I am to use this thing.
The Emperor protects.
>Tries the machineGoin' AFK for about an hour
>>47645718
>Small distinct screams and rumblings increasing in intensity felt through the hanger.
Uh, Corporal. Any chance to hurry up the regiment? I think trouble's heading our way.
>>47645701
>you hear a familiar laughter just over your head
Mh mh mh, What d-do we have here. M-me and you alone in the depths of a space hulk...
I w-wonder what should I do to you, now?
>>47645750
That kind of force should be able to take on his defenses with minimal losses, unless he sends the assassins... Which would mean his personal protection would weaken.
>>47645752
>takes out his shotgun and brings it close to his chest.
shits about to hit the fan again isn't it?
>>47645791
Excellent, we'll be able to land soon.
>>47645822
Yeah
>readies his Hotshot lasgun
Not our day is it.
>>47645822
>>47645866
Troopers. Get away from those two ships and toward the bay, that's an order. I will be dispatching boarding ships in a short while.
>>47645775
>Checks her dataslate and reaches for "her" pulserifle. Now looking for the voices owner.
>Beginns to talk in broken low gothic for the first time, allthough with heavy accent.
A widnes? Nov?
>>47645619Still need a sitrep por favor
>Dmitry and his posse, blissfully unaware of the situation at hand, are unfortunately not as blissfully regaining consciousness
>Which is not only a major risk for anything in the surrounding vicinity on a radius of the 7 closest systems including the one they're in
>It just happens to be a health risk for themselves as none of them come along in social interactions, let alone a military operation, when terribly hungover
>Then again they're borderline heretical freelancers anyway following a few "accidents" regarding their superiors dying in questionable conditions
>So participating in a military operation is not their primary concern, procuring remedies as to stall or postpone their due hangover of an exterminatus scale however, is their primary objective, as soon as they've gotten up and running, so to speak
>>47644875
>The warning slowly grows quieter as the space hulk floats further away from the source
>>47645880
alright then
>backs away from the ships,
>bumping into Larrs who is curently bashing his head against a wall and demanding that somebody leave him alone.
>>47645905we are on a space hulk which is now under the control of a friendly ork and we're waiting to get off
>>47645916
>>47645937
>the bashing slowly stops as Larrs regains his composure.
what is happening to me?
>draws his shurikan pistol when he hears the noises?
>>47645905Reg is currently on a Spooce Helk that they stopped from crash landing on Mara(Which would be like really really bad) and debating how to get back to the Penance. They also happened to find a pair of Luna Wolves Gunships in one of the more intact and unlooted sections. A-A-And Bob is staying with da Orks....instead of us.....
Meanwhile Alice, LIX, Callidon(Possibly 149 too if he can make it) and posse are off to to capture a major Heretic for....reasons.
>>47645899
Sh, sh sh sh! It will all be fine...
>she drops from the ceiling, kicking the inflitrate from midair before jumping on him
Bon appetite, Miranda!
>she plunges her knife in his throath
>>47645880
Sir, yes, Sir! Moving towards bay
>Slowly backing, hotshot aimed towards source of now more chittering sounds.
>>47645998
Everytime! EVERY THRONE DAMNED TIME! WHY!?! Why is it my luck within this regiment sucks! Every throne damned mission something g stupid happens!
>>47645988
>Is dropping to the ground, pulserifle still in hand as the helmet slids of her head and reveals the face of a now dead tau.
>>47645979
>>47645937Good to know, wonder how the fuck the Valhallan alcoholic menace crew got there (spehs hulk) and what they've been doing but presume any/all consumable toxins have been consumed
>The Valhallans, well the first ones up at least, are slowly figuring out their surroundings, unfortunately they've self-wiped their memories with more efficiency than inquisitorial psykers
>And with all their would-be loot consumed and or expended/killed the Valhallan men of mayhem decide it is time to figure out how to haul ass and go on better adventures because this place is boring and nobody is aroundLocation of Valhallans: Locate any living life forms, head in the exact opposite direction until there are no life forms in front of you, discover Valhallans
Simply put, they're definitely not around anyone
>Back on the Penance, that guy that just seems to be everywhere knocks on the door to Sam's quarters.
>Back inside the Penance, Ron is sitting inside of his hanger-bar. He finishes stirring his beverage, then leans back onto the bar listening to the ship's long-range vox.
Man, it's nice and quiet. Morale's up, got cash flowing in, but something's different.
>rubs his stubbly chin, gazing up to the ceiling
Maybe it's the time of year.
>>47646112Please for the love of all that is holy tell me you'll be available on Sunday. PLZ
>>47646101
>You hear nothing but the almost quiet moves of an tau drone, allthough there seem to be a few quick footsteps and something being dragged around.
>>47646142I have been apocalyptically busy moving in. I'm 99% sure I'll be done for Sunday. I'll probably be hungover as Hell, but I'll be there.
>The young sergeant would wander aimlessly through the corridors of the space hulk,
> his lasrifle is aimed in front of him as he makes small talk with him self in an effort to keep calm, all while keeping an eye on on his surroundings
Throne dammit... why is it always me this happens to...? Why couldn't I have been assigned to a proper.... could be sitting nice and cozy on some forwa-... if I see that elder lars, or any of the others after this I swear to throne ill-... Mess better be severing Regasel pudding for dinner...
Well, I´ll go turn on da zoggin´ big tellyporta so yiz can get to yer ship.
>Walks to a command console and presses a few buttons before whacking it with a small wrench
>>47646171
Miss? Is everything okay in there? Should I call a Medic?
>Knocks the door again, then fetches a Keycard from his backpack of wonders.
>>47646182Good. Because we're about to risk getting our shit shoved in fighting a Cyborg. LONG LIVE KANE. TIBERIUM IS THE FUTURE. DEATH TO G.D.I.
Trying something new as to retire the now seemingly useless Valhallans, I'll write an endgame for them eventually, sometime, maybe.
>"Ratface" was moving around on the ship he had been assigned to, he was enjoying his "promotion" to serve in a penal regiment, which just happened to be a penal regiment being used by Inquisitors and all sorts of things were happening, proper military actions instead of just being expendable cannon fodder
>Naturally "Ratface" would have deserved a standard penal regiment filled with scum and destined to die, but the commissar in question of conscripting him probably saw something special, or felt sorry for him, you never know...
>But now here he was, strolling around on a buzzing but still rather empty cruiser, thinking about what he's supposed to do, and whether or not he could get to practice his talents for service of the Imperium, maybe, maybe not.
>The universe is a large place, and if anything is certain, it is that everyone WILL be forgotten.
>But for now he was content in walking around, not making eye contact and saluting everyone around, also wondering why he was seemingly the only one with a bomb collar
>>47646232
>The tau drone begins to beep loudly, while a female voice tells it to be quiet. It´s not Sam´s voice.
>>47646189
>What appears to be a Naval Armsman steps out of the shadows slowly, arms raised to show he doesn't mean harm.
You alright mate? Seems you got yourself a bit lost. Want me to help you out?
>>47646239I-I-I like the Vostroyans...........it's just that Alice is sort of....busy so.....
>>47646278Vostroyans? Dude lay the bong down and drink some water or something, Vostroyans may be bro tier but the Valhallans are drunk obnoxious cunts, and currently they've outlived their usefulness
>>47646269
>The Armsman draws his Colt and checks it's loaded before swiping the Keycard against the reader.
I'm coming in......
>Attempts to open the door.
>>47646298D-D-Damnit........I was so proud that I actually didn't goof the char name. W-Will they maybe come back in the future? Or Dmitry at least? Plz him. He is gud bro
All right. All humiez to da big tellyporta. Hulky, aktivate da waypointies. From all humies to da tellyporta platform 2C.
>Small green lights are lit on the shortest route to the tellyporta
>Ork drones carrying small "Dis way" signs are dispatched to retrieve the more distant members of the regiment
>>47646142Whats on Sunday?
>>47646359
>follows the Orks and so does Mot
>>47646361Dank Horsey(Dark Heresy)
>>47646357Maybe maybe not, they're the assholes that you deserve, not the ones you need right now
>>47646357
>You see a lone weaponless earth caste tau try to perform cpr on an not moving Sam. She seems to be having been beat comatose with a rifle on the head.
>The tau drone his flying across the room, still beeping. Perhaps the drone is worried?
>>47646374
Lokkin´ on da nearest ship... Oh, take one of deze with ya. Da tellyporta isn´t what it used to be.
>Points at a box filled with "lokalizzed tellyportas"
>>47646278
>Not expecting to see a naval swab jump out from one of the passages, the young man would fire off a shot of his lasrifle in his direction. Only for it to narrowly miss the mark, due to a peice of interior plating falling from the ceiling and absorbing the shot
THRONE DAMMIT!! YOU SCARED THE FETH OUT OF ME AND NEARLY GOT YOUR ASS SHOT! NEXT TIME WARN ME!
>Reappears from teleportation just a few steps away from where the device was engaged.
Huh... it didn' seem to work propperly, I'm roughly at the same spot...
>>47646441
>The Armsman takes one look at this scenario before digging into the 'magic backpack' and producing a syringe of something called "Revivey stuff" and a set Defib.
Move yer' arse and let me work.
>The Armsman injects Sam with the "Revivey Stuff" and shocks her a few times with the Defib equipment
>Ratface seems to be patrolling around
>When in reality the crook among crooks is looking for tools to release him from his explosive bindings
>naturally trying to pick the lock of a bomb collar results in an explosion, whereas opening it with the key designed for it, won't
>But having his head blasted off is beginning to be the least of the concerns of the sole guardsman conscript only known as "Ratface"
>>47646532
>The earth caste tau does so, albeit reluctantly. She doesn´t take her eyes off from Sam.
>The tau drone starts to beep again. This time out of... happniness?
>>47646464
My apologies, but it simply won't do to have you wandering about lost on this ship.
>To this end this Armsman retrieves what looks like a very fancy Vox Handset from one of his satchels.
>He offers the device to Malak and gestures to the controls.
You hit the Red button to get back to the Penance. Blue one'll take you to where everyone else is on the Hulk. Don't hit the Green one. It will end badly.
>With that, the Armsman walks around a corner and vanishes.....
>>47646532
>Only to show up smoking a Lho as Ratface rounds a corner on his 'patrol'.
You want help with that? I've got what you need.
>>47645862
Remember, the Inquisitor will try any dirty tricks he has up his sleeve to escape punishment. We´ll need to be careful, even if we manage to apprehend him unharmed... Well, mostly.
>>47646581
>>47646535The bottom bit from this one actually goes with this other one. I am the dume.
>>47646607
>Delta is casually checking her Phase Sword as these words are muttered.
>>47646633
I would like to remind you that his punishment for his crimes is to be lowered into molten brass. I assure you, getting him alive is the better option.
>>47646581
>Looking down at the device in his hand questioningly for a moment; the sergeant would look back up towards the naval armsmen, only to realized he'd vanished.
>He'd then look back at the box like device before wondering aloud-
What the Feth...?
>>47646486
>>47646374
>Shaking his head free of the confusion, and not trusting this strange device, Malak would, for the uptenth time since becoming separated, attempt to vox the rest of his squad that were aboard the space hulk.
Eisen? Larry? Can anyone of you rejects hear me? If so respond Throne dammit! Otherwise of, AND WHEN we get back to the Penance, I'm going to rip each of your arses open with a bayonet before I seal it shut with a damn plasma rifle!
>>47646607
>>47646633
>>47646695
He'll live, at least until the Fists decide what to do with him.
>The ship is rather close to the planet now.
After their decision....well....it's out of our hands.
>>47646695
Hm?
>Looks up from checking her sword.
Oh nonono, I wasn't planning on killing him.
Just... you know, scare him a little, maybe hurt him a little too.
>>47646748
Sarge? Is that you? I don't remember you being around the radio feed when I teleported out.
Wait... how much time did I take to teleport back on?
>>47646751
>>47646763
Good. I believe the Fists will find Inquisitorial judgement satisfying enough.
>>47646786
>With a sigh of relief, the young Orvestillian sergeant would respond back
Oh thank the God Emperor! I thought my Vox was broken or everyone else was dead!
And no idea! I've been wandering around aimlessly for the past few hours since my squad and I got split u- wait! Did you say TELEPORTED!?!
>>47646854
Yes sarge, ork tech, was the only way to get into the teleporter bay... seems to have malfunctioned though, didn't move from the spot.
Tellyporta iz ready, target locked and all of da humiez should find da way ´ere sooner or later. first batch, off ya go!
>Those on the tellyporta find themselves back on Penance
>>47646579
>The Armsman continues his efforts, if Sam is going to wake up at all, she should......well now really.
>>47646581
>>47646616"Seen."
>Ratface salutes, makes no eye contact, and resumes walking.
>Quietly
>And it's not really walking it looks more like he's gliding, like he makes walking movements but it's soundless and the man just... glides... he's not bobbing up and down like a normal person, he just moves and glides...
>>47646965
>Is slowly opening her eyes. Taking a tau, her drone and the armsman into view.
Wheresss?
>Still a bit slurring Sam attempts to stand up, while checking the back of her head.
Errr... Dank yo? Wad hapend?
>>47646880
>His voice would quickly rise as he begins screaming angerly into the communicator
What the HOLY FETH!?! That's blasted heresy using Xeno tech!! You'd damn well hope no one finds out about this dammit!
>With an exasperated sigh, he'd once again begin to speak in his more regular voice
Anyways, that's not important right now. What's important is that we regroup. Where exactly are you? Is anyone else with you?
>sips amasec
Sry guys. Got early morn stuff tmr and can't stay up. Have a good one.
>>47646374
>by this point the warning is merely a whisper in the distance
>But the words still remain fresh in your mind
>Shun this place
>>47647034
Uhm pretty much the whole regiment Sarge.
Also, the use of xeno tech is allowed for some bloody reason in this regiment. I have my complains about it myself, but you said I shouldn't addhere to protocol that much.
>>47647034Oh man this guy should see Dmitry... He'd go apeshit. They'd both go apeshit. But Dmitry would pull "Muh rank" card and then wave around his metaphorical dick, alongside his real dick, and then they'd fight and someone would win but the universe would still lose regardless of who survives.
I like to make-believe
>Ratface has found tools
>He is not picking his bomb collar
>He is making a bomb
>Because his great ancestors were actually chechens, and he is following the ancient and revered recipe of "even bomb is bomb"
>His ingredients are toilet paper, high explosives, duct tape, a vox caster, wiring, a spoon, various debris found across the ship, and naturally, a detpack, because he pretty much has no idea on how to make bombs out of bombs so when you blow up a bomb the bomb blows up.
>>47647032
I have no idea, but perhaps you should ask that one.
>The Armsman points at the Tau.
>>47647075
>He'd let our a sigh of relief at knowing the rest of his squad was fine
Well I'm glad to hear you're still adhering to the orders I gave you eariler. Which by the way, are still in effect. But I'm even more glad to hear the rest of the dreg-fits are still alive as well.
At this rate I should be at your location within a few moments.
>At this point, he'd begin double timing it to where the rest of Dreg-fits squad was waiting.
>>47647215
Roger that, sarge, I'll just be on the look for a way to access the teleporter bay. If you need anything, just vox me up.
>>47647141
>The other one appears around the corner again.
Would you like some help with that? My idea is much safer for your health.
>He seems to be holding a key.....and some Lhos.
>>47647232
Wait...they just...hand you guys keys for bomb collars?
Really?
>Ratface was just about one duct taping a set of frag grenades on his collar, trying to figure out how to attach the detpack
>>47647285
They don't actually, I just have a lot of spare stuff.
>The Armsman tosses Ratface the key, along with some Lhos, a Lighter and some Rotgut.
A -loooooooooooooot- of spare stuff.
>Looks at the earth caste tau and groans.
So that´s what...?
>The tau nods and sinks her head, while starting to speak in tau with Sam.
>The conversation seems to be about hunted to down farsigth enclave members and tau infiltrators from the star empire.
Not really believeing that but...
>Sam points at her head.
Why?
You seemed to belong more to the regiment than to the sept for her liking...
>The tau shrugged again and mutters something about Sam being considered a traitor now.
>Sam turns to the armsman and sighs.
Can´t really... believe that... Is the regiment here? I think... they need to know...
>Sams voice gets quieter until she is completely silent and looks like a kicked puppy.
>>47647318
Wow, thanks I guess?
I'll just... You might want to take some cover? Just in case
>He uses the key on his bomb collar, and lo and behold it unlocks instead of blowing up, which in turn would've resulted in the detonation of the rest of the "acquired" explosives
Phew...well there's that done....
What's your name man? You got one?
>Ratface, looking like a unholy abomination himself, ironically having a purity seal stamped to the back of his head, tries to socialize best he can
>The scars, well he definitely wasn't born with them, and he didn't get them by just having something blow up on his face, these were "earned" with long terms of misbehavior
Well, the rest should be able to use diz. I´ll go check da engine.
>>47647375
forgot to link to >>47647194
>>47647230
>Several minutes later, there would be a loud banging coming from one of the teleportatipn bays doors, as malak begin hammering and screaming into his Vox for Eisen or somebody to open the Fething door
OPEN IT UP! FOR THE LOVE OF THE GOD EMPEROR! OPEN IT UP!!!
>there's would be sounds of las fire in the background
>>47647404
Eh.....I do, but most people just call me "That other Armsman that they swear they see everywhere". Suppose I can't blame them...
>>47647411
>pops from a pipe vent.
Who are you and where am i in this ship?
>Jackson and his men seem to be hurrying something big into a transport.
Lets get out of here! Mount up and get moving! Let's go! There's nothing important here...
>he eyes the old hawks and walks towards them.
>The ship containing the infiltrators eventually lands on St. Astrid's Fall.....all sneaky like.
>Guns are like....readied and stuff.
>>47647465
>Opens up. What's happenning?! Have the orks Betrayed us?! I knew we couldn't trust Bob!
>Flamer is ready.
>>47647512
>Checks her gun, reloads and readies it.
When you say, ma'am
>>47647512
>The settlement where the rogue Inquisitor hides is two clicks to the local north
>The troops and Vehicles arrive only a few moments later
>>47647480
I´z mek Wrenchface, and yiz iz rite next to da big tellyporta. Hop in and press da bug blue button to get back to da humie ship.
>>47647472
Eh, well you got a y'know, you look kinda like I've seen ya before man, but it's like I could forget yo' face...
Anyway, I gotta go put this stuff back together where I found it
Catch ya later man right?
>Ratface walks off to return all the stuff he had "borrowed" in order to try and blow up his bomb collar
>>47647602
That you will. Take care of yourself man. This place is crazy.
>The man walks around another corner and vanishes
>>47647592
What are the odds that my body would be teleported into two different locations.
>>47647626
Small. Da blue button brings lukk. Take one of dem lil´ metal bitz with da button on them. If yiz tellyport wrong, press da button to tellyport again, until yiz tellyport roite.
>>47647541
>>47647569
Alright, that's his hideout just down here.
Plan is, we'll set up a perimeter using Tarantula Systems and send one of our Russes and two Platoons of Infantry in to tie up his defenses while -we- go after him. Rest of our troops will stay in reserve. If things go pear shaped, we send in the other two tanks and the rest of the Company.
If he tries to escape, the Sentries will take down his escape craft and we'll move in for the kill. Got it?
>There is a chorus of nods and "Yes Sir"s from the troops before they move to their positions, leaving a few Motorbikes.
>A lone female trooper is seen doing latrine duty near the female quarters.
Damned stupid punishable birth order!
>>47647665
Meh, too risky i'm going back to the squig beer deck.
>goes back into the vent.
>>47647707
Well... Datz a good idea.
>>47647681
>The approach goes as planned, and the settlement stays asleep
>Even the old mansion where the rogue Inquisitor resides in has no lights
>>47647513
>He'd quickly begin squeezing his body through now growing gap between the bulkhead doors, firing off shots with his lasrifle into the darkness behind him the entire time
>Deep within the darkened hallway behind him, chittering claws, and animalistic screams would be heard each time the metal tunnel is momentarily lit bright red by las fire, illuminating the faces and claws of dozens, if not hundreds of Tyranid genestealers, rippers , and far larger Tyranids, quickly closing in
Not green skins you wannabe Kregier! Think a walking Cancer with long teeth, sharp claws, and that likes to leave planets barren of biomass!
If you guessed the typical Tyranid genestealer, then guess what!?! You won a prize! A life time supply of Tyranids too SHOOT AT!!!
>Having returned all the stuff he "borrowed" Ratface is now back on "patrol", looking to "borrow" some proper gear for himself
>He seems to be singing trough litanies of fury, judging by the pace his wording escapes his lips, but the language he sings is some kind of heavy accent of high gothic
"undetected...stealth perfected.."
>>47647681
For some reason I was expecting our horses rather than the bikes.
back
Rolled 15 (1d20)
>>47647758
>Laughs manniacally whilst firing the flamer at the coming genestealers
I LOVE THE SMELL OF BURNT BUGS IN THE MORNING!
>>47647757
>The troops are in position, just waiting for the signal.
>>47647768
We'll be using those when we're getting out. Make them think that the Bikers are still inside.
Now come on, need to get in position to kick off this party.
>Alice climbs mounts her bike and rides off onto a hill overlooking a shuttle pad.
>>47647782Welcome back mate, would Greely be interested in Genestealers on a Space Helk?
>>47647827
>Does the same.
>>47647827
>Follows her on his bike, although from his clumsiness you can tell he hasn´t driven one of the things before
>>47647794
>The sergeant would finally manage to push himself through the gap just as the Wannabe Krieger began flaming up the hallway, and narrowly manageing to avoid getting charred with burning promenthian.
>He'd then quickly swap out his empty energy mag with a fresh one, before firing into the darkened halls filled with life devouring Xeno monstrosities, all the while screaming angerly at Eisen.
DAMMIT MAN!!! Be careful with that! I almost became crisper then a Vogwite Steak!
>>47647858
>Drives a bit closer.
Try to stabilize yourself with your shoulders rather than just moving the controls into the direction you want to and don't give the engine too much power.
Rolled 1 (1d20)
>>47647794
>pops from vent
Eisen! I've got beer.
>throws a can
Rolled 7 (1d20)
>>47647890
Sorry sir but this is... when I FEEL MOST ALIVE!
>Keeps blazing as the rest of the squad begins closing the doors.
Rolled 2 (1d20)
>at this point, Malak would begin screaming for anyone, or anything with. Weapon to start pulling his weight and helping out with these damned Xenos.
>All the while be would begin cursing at both his luck, and the Xenos before him.
I'm not gonna fucking die here dammit! Not a a Fething chance I'm dying here!
>>47647827
>A servant walks out the front door and to the gate
>He locks the gate and picks up a delivery box left there
>Then he walks back towards the mansion
>>47647919
Duly noted. No hard feelings on the interrogation?
>>47647994
It's alright, I was never mad with you, only with myself.
"Interrogator?"
"Yes, Captain?"
"Permission to ask a question?"
"Go ahead, Captain."
"What in the name of Dorn's mustache is going on on that hulk? I haven't seen a single ship launch for pickup."
"It is peculiar, and I don't like it. I should go check it o- I mean, send a team to check it out. Either the Ork turned on us or he's clueless - my thrones are on the latter. Better not to go in without knowing, though."
>Greely seems a bit disappointed, but feels smarter for not going off half-cocked.
Rolled 14 (1d20)
>>47647962
Calm down you yellow-belly and fire your gun properly.
You're shot are embarrassing.
>fires hellgun salvo
Rolled 4 (1d20)
>>47648109
>>47647962
Come on, we're getting those doors closed, one final push!
>Keeps firing
>>47647927
>>47647943
>>47647962
>Meanwhile, deep within the ships bowls
>The Presence of new prey and a new world had awoken it from its long sleep. It's mind was filled with the thoughts of need. The need to grow, and to acquire more Biomass.
>But something had changed. And when it realized the hulk was no longer on a direct course for the world, it became different. It's thoughts became filled with anger at those that had done this.
>If it could not have the planet below, then it would take what it wanted from those aboard.
>And now it waited, for soon it would have want it wanted, even if the swarm had to decrease slightly for it to obtain what is craved. They would soon fall to the numberless and be absorbed. Fuel to become a true hive
>Meanwhilebat the teleportation bay doors
>The swarm continued pressing forwards. Passing over the dead and burning bodies beneath them with almost Feral instinct towards the fresh prey in the room before them. Getting ever closer with each passing second
Rolled 8 (1d20)
>>47648131
>aims for the big red button
>throws a boot
>>47647507
NO.
If you do that I will blow you out in the transports.
>>47648169
Fucking orks been living over a fucking tyranid army all this time! Where are they anyways? I'd rather let the Xenos die fighting Xenos than let men die fighting Xenos!
>Keeps blazing the nids away until the doors are finally closed shut.
Ok, teleporter bay, time to configure a warp out. We'll just let the orks take this vessel filled of bugs with them to the Eye of Terror
>>47647848
>>47647858
>>47647919
>>47647964
>Alice pulls her bike up on a hill and gets off, taking the Rocket Launcher with her.
And.....this is the signal.
>As she fires at the Shuttle Pad, the tank and the infantry following it push towards the manor, wonderfully controlled Chaos, of the right kind.
>With that, Alice mounts the bike and speeds towards the back door of the manor.
Come on! We've got to move now!
Rolled 18 (1d20)
>>47648109
>Reloading his once again empty rifle, the sergeant would begin firing into the hoard of Xenos before him,
>Without looking over towards the officer next to him, he'd simply yell back
I'm sorry, I kinda can't feel my THRONE DAMN HANDS RIGHT NOW!!! NOW. quit your bitching and focus on your own shots!
>>47648171
What the hell are you doing! You missed the fucking button and almost hit me!
>>47647507
>Approaches you orderly
Excuse me sir but do you know where the Adeptus Janitorum is to clean up all these corpses?
>>47648224
>>47648217
>>47648171
>over comms
Is any of you fuckers still alive? Transports have been launched. They are scheduled to dock on a large bay in the northeast section of the hulk.
>>47648224
>Whispering whilst configuring the teleporter to get back to the Penance
Emperor Damn it, Sarge you are a figure of authority you need to keep your morale together for the men's sake! Never let them know you are doubting about getting out alive on the field because then they will doubt!
>>47648284
I read you, Chief, we found some bugs and enclosed ourselves on the teleporter bay, the door is closed due to tyranid body saturation, we'll get back to the penance through teleportation, make sure the void shields are down, please.
>Is walking acroos the space hulk following the sound of gunfire while complaining about something.
Damned.Sacred.Shitty.Firstborn.Laws.
>Draws a vostroyan lasgun and raises it in front of her.To avoid confusion, Sam Hawthorns plyaers here. Need a break from tau, though I will still post as Sam when needed.
>>47648284
>taps vox device.
Right......
Where that is?
>>47648251
That was my good backup boot.
>>47648284
>He'd quickly activate his Vox to respond, to her
Negative, Negative! Do not let those birds land! I repeat, do NOT let those transports land! We have an unknown number of Tyranids on board! Repeat! Tyranids are ON-BOARD!
>>47648342
>cleans discarded boot with adeptus janitorum issue garbage bag
>>47648319
Gotcha, Burnman. I look forward to see in how many pieces you are back.
>>47648353
Then I'll hold you responsible if the board my transports. Are there still other troopers around the Hulk?
>>47648302
>Without looking back to the wannabe Krieger, he'd simply shout back
Did I SAY I was doubting our chances!? NO! I'm simply giving the excuse that I couldnt feel my hands from the gvibrations, but their the feelings back now!
>>47648393
No, but you have the adeptus janitorum.
Rolled 6 (1d20)
>>47648420
>>47648302
Keep shooting you idiots.
And someone find me another throwing boot!
Rolled 13 (1d100)
>>47648420
But you showed fear to them. Sarge you can never show fear to your men, if they see you break, they will break.
>Finishes configuring teleporter.
I think that's it... I'll... test if it's propperly configured, I'll set the coordinates to a few steps away from us to test it...
>Grabs some ork junk
>Throws it inside the teleporter.
>Rolling to see how much of it comes out on the other end
>>47648393
Anyone not with us is probably with the Emperor now. And you can hold me accountable only for the men I've got here! I'm not losing to these bastards yet!
>>47648342
>He'd turn his head over to the officer
Forget about this door, and go check and seal the others! We just need to hold out 'till that Xeno contraption gets finished up!
>>47648471
The airlock is closed, Liutenant! They'll have to pierce it to reach us first.
roll+1d20
>throws boots at encroaching horde
>>47648219
>Follows (we're moving the engagement to the background or...?)
>>47648507
I'll have the transport hover around that area for a bit just in case. You have one hour before I raise the void shields again.
>>47648520You need to type dice+1d20 at the options tab to make rolls
>Is trying to reach the rest of the regiment by vox, while walking around massive amounts of corpses.
>>47648520dice+1d20 in the option field
Rolled 1 (1d20)
>>47648519
Aye, watch the floors and ceiling too.
Im gonna find us a suitable vent.
Rolled 19, 6 = 25 (2d20)
>>47648496
>He's simply keep firing into the horde in front of him, the head of which couldnt be more than 30-40 feet away
I didn't show anything and you know it!
Now you bloody better have good news on that teleporter!
>He'd quicly unpin and chuck a frag grenades into he horde
>>47648559
ha ha ha fuck im autistic
>>47648583
>notices that all the vents are shut tight.
Nope, no can do.
We are trapped here.
Rolled 1 (1d100)
>>47648603
I have, both good and bad.
Good news is that nobody went in.
Bad news is that whilst it does teleport things from one spot to the other it doesn't teleport them whole. There's only half the junk I threw in here. I'll try to fix it.
Rolled 20 (1d20)
>rolling to clean bodies
>>47648574
>Hearing some sort of static play back on his Vox, he'd tap it a few times, trying to fix it.
>Once it had cleared up slightly, he'd begin talking
Hel-"static" Who is th-"static" respond immediat-"static"!
