>you find a legendary sword
>it's on fire and crackles with demonic sexual energy
>seriously, it's rad as hell
>it's 2016 and guns are a thing
How do you proceed?
>>45554232
Learn how to parry bullets
I take it out see what I can do with it, and then put it away. It's not like even guns have much of a place in the modern world... Actually now that I think about it, I'll start a youtube channel about video games and such, complete with one of those stupid face cam things in the corner. Only instead of my face, the camera will be focused on the sword at all times, and I will talk to the sword, not the audience.
>>45554232
I check to see if I can cut the following things in half:
A chair
A cinder block
A boulder
A hill
A building
A mountain
A city
A continent
An ocean
A moon
A planet
A star
Where I go from there depends on where I stop being able to cut things.
>>45554232
use both, obviously
>>45554272
A reasonably sized mountain isn't a problem, and you can take out a few city blocks at a time, but that's the best it can do.
In the sword's defense, that was more enough to take down the last Demon King.
>>45554232
Take it, melt it down, use the metal in creation of a gun.
>>45554414
It's already on fire. Heat doesn't seem to have any effect on it.
>>45554406
Well shit, guess I'm using a sword now.
I make a private fortune in lumbering and mining, and then use the funds to hunt down more artifacts. Probably in ancient nazi vaults.
>>45554406
So unless you're in a completely open field, the sword actually has a longer effective range than most guns?
Even if you are out in the open, it sounds like you could dig an instant trench for cover by swinging at the ground.
>>45554406
That's a good sword. You could do all sorts of shit with it. It's like a reusable cruise missile you can fit in the back of your car. Not something I'd use for open combat, but it could still have a place nowadays.
Can you turn the fire off? That seems like it would get real annoying real quick.
>>45554406
Explain why a sword can take out mountains
>>45554232
I guess I'll keep it as long as it doesnMr attract trouble, but I don't actually have any particular use for it in my life.
If it becomes too much a pain in the ass I'll just hawk it for a few bucks on eBay or something.
>>45554505
>>Doesn't understand how swords work
Hah, faggot
>>45554490
The fire is a purely cosmetic effect. It's cool to the touch.
>>45554505
It's a really good sword.
>>45554560
It would still be pretty bright, though. It might make stealth stuff a bit harder.
>>45554616
On the other hand, no need to carry around a flashlight.
>>45554663
Yeah, but running around a restricted area with a turned on flashlight is like strapping a neon "shoot me" sign to your chest. I suppose if it has a scabbard that would suppress the flames.
>>45554232
Hang it above the fireplace.
Actually, install a fireplace in my home first.
>>45554694
It would definitely have to, or it would be nearly useless since it would be a major hassle to carry it around or, for that matter, just store the damn thing
>>45554505
Because it was swung with passion.
>>45554696
>not installing a pile of logs and using the sword as your fireplace
>>45554710
A normal scabbard would be enough to put a lid on the flame effect, but no force on earth can stop the aura of raw sexual energy.
>>45554406
>cuts down several city blocks at a time
This is a good sword. I'm keeping it.
![latest[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/FicjoGD.jpg "latest[1].jpg")
>>45554406
>A reasonably sized mountain isn't a problem
RIBBIT RIBBIT
RIBBIT?
>>45554232
I stick the hilt in my poop hole
>>45554505
Dude, have you ever even SEEN a sword before?
>>45554232
Get my mom to make everything vow not to hurt me.
>>45554455
This was a poor use of trips-dubs-dubs
>>45554232
One steel pressure vessel, one water supply and one turbine later: my own power station.
Judging by the destructive potential I think I can match a standard nuclear reactor for output.
So... I guess I lease it to the government and retire on the money.
>>45554505
Comeon guys there's an easy answer to this
Magic
>>45554978
If you're a limpwristed pansu or terrible comicbook writer maybe.
>>45554232
I have no need for demonic sexual energies, so I'll just sell it.
>>45554505
>>45554232
I stab mother fuckers. Works for Gurkhas.
>>45554232
>It's 2016
Well, then I enter a gay marriage.
>>45554929
Yeah because that worked so well for the last guy.
>>45555165
Only California will let you marry a sword.
>>45555180
Come on, it's 2016!
>>45555063
>I have no need for demonic sexual energies
I think that may be the least true statement ever communicated.
>>45554406
In what world are mountains less tough a target than a few city blocks?
Take sword go to Muslim buttfuck land and kill Isis or whatever
>>45554232
Go looking for a gun good enough to accompany it and its sheath.
Then I work on acquiring whatever level of armour I can, hopefully something bulletproof and sword proof.
Then I decide wtf to do with my sweet gear and probably end up giving it to someone else to use because Im an old ass man at this point, having dedicated my life to finding a gun and armour good enough to accompany this sword.
>>45555246
That'd be difficult from r the same reason we can't just bomb them all: they're surrounded by too many innocent people and that sword doesn't probably discriminate too finely.
>>45555231
Maybe those are mountains made of chalk and the buildings are more like bigger armored bunkers invulnerable to jet fuel and all.
>>45554232
>How do you proceed?
I sell it on ebay.
>>45554930
Getfaggotry is a poor use of posts of any number.
>>45555266
But Swordman isn't the politically correct US gubsmint
>>45554734
Would I be rolling nat 20s for my IRL seduction rolls? And would someone seducing me bypass my willpower save?
Also, if it's demonic, what effect do religious/spiritual articles have on it? Does it have a holy counterpart?
Start with cashing in $1000000 from Randi.
Then let the CERN bunch have their way with it.
>>45554232
see if it can shoot some kind of demonic sexual energy beams or deflect bullets. If it can't do one or the other I doubt its quality.
>>45554232
Keep the sword on my person and use the demonic sexual energy to get laid. Also make youtube videos of me slicing bottles of Mountain Dew with it.
>>45554527
>>45554603
>>45554718
>>45554759
>le may may answers
The fuck was I even expecting from weeb shits
>>45554978
>>45555132
And how does the sword use magic to level city blocks?
>>45555930
Probably energy blasts or shockwaves or some similar magic bullshit.
Or its one of those ones that extends. A celtic hero of legend supposedly had a sword long enough to cut the tops off hills like
>>45554232
Vote 'liberal' so that noone can have funs, run around chopping bitches, and killan dudes.
The more interesting question would be:
What if everyone had a sword like that: >>45554406 ?
Recon would be a top priority, sincd taking out enemy on the other side of a hill would require precision strikes and coordinated teamwork.
Armor would be useless, but maybe a really deep underground bunker would work.
Communication towers would need to be kept at a minimum size/concealed well, since a single infantry man can cut them down in one swipe.
>>45556080
>what are guided missiles and artillery
Magic swords ain't doing shit if the users aren't able to deny air superiority and can't get in range
>>45554232
Bayonet.
>>45555930
You don't even know what a meme is.
>>45554232
>>45554560
There go my plans on turning it into a fantastic steam generator.
>>45554753
You are now a corn dog.
>>45554232
>An anon forged me a sword made of demonic sexual energy
>Whenever I cut something, I am actually sexing it with the Demon King's 'Immovable Rod' and that is why the sword works.
>>45555636
Explain.
>>45558963
>>45559521
There's this guy, The Amazing Randi aka James Randi, offering up $1000000 to anyone that can demonstrate having supernatural powers/abilities. So far, no one got the prize.
Did someone say sword? I heard there was a sword here.
>>45554232
I built a mechsuit to wield the sword and find 7 buddies with matching mechsuits to form an anim-... I mean, squad with and revolt against my peoples oppressive government.
>>45554232
A+ game screen shot, anon.
>>45554232
It's a bayonet now.
>>45554272
>No solid steel beams or katanas listed
You need to work on your priorities fampai
>>45554406
Demon Kings are not for slaying! They are for macroeconomics.
>>45562056
Burning swords can't cut steel beams
>>45562329
Red pilled wizards plz go
>>45554616
That's what the sheathe is for.
