>you will never be a hunky human warrior
>you will never go into battle with your goblin bros
>you will never make their sisters swoon when you return to town
I dont like Goblins
>>45312568
I'm afraid I don't follow.
Actually, I am a hunky human warrior. Not quite THAT hunky, but still, 1/3 ain't bad.
>>45313878
>not being a 20/20 trample double strike
>>45312517
Are the goblins' sisters any less gnarly-looking than their brothers?
>>45313927
they probably look something like this
>all that facial hair, and no body hair.
>>45312517
I'd rather be a Paladin, sans the chastity. I like helping people and I'd get to woo fair maidens while I shake hands with their dads
>>45312517
or we could just be pampered first-worlders enjoying the wonders and comfort of the modern age.
>>45314004
He doesn't really have much facial hair. He's rather well groomed actually.
>>45314210
Kills the barbarian vibe. Probably has manicured nails
>>45314164
a fan of chicken tendies?
>>45313927
In the best world they would look like this. More likely like this >>45313978
Or maybe they are like lizards with next to no sexual dimorphism and look exactly like the men.
Know that feel. Married the chief's daughter.
>>45316020
What's with the timblr hair?
>>45318384
It's a tumblr drawing, that's why. Tumblr is really big into the shortstack meme since it "promotes alternative relationships" or some other faggy bullshit. That's why they all swoon over Incase's comic about a halfling housewife cucking her husband.
>>45318454
Hoping that comic ends like:
http://exhentai.org/s/97c298bb22/628602-1(Trap cucks a dude, wife tells husband she needs trap's cock, husband claims trap as his)
>>45312517
Why would I want goblin sisters swoon over me?
>>45320615
Funniest thing ever.
>>45318454
Don't forget the husband she's cucking is gay, and the cucking is interracial.
>>45312517
>you will never get shanked in your sleep by jealous goblins
can goblins grow beards
>>45320615
Got a name for this? I'm on my phone
>>45312517
>tfw even can't make sister swoon
What's the point of living
>>45312517
>you will never be a hunky human warriorI am working out and eating healthy for a month already.I am quite tall and have wide shoulders. Wish me luck /tg/
>>45321100
Full title from Ex is "(FF21)[San Se Fang]Wang Er-Xi ― Night Stories from a Chinese Studio[English]"
God-speed you /d/generate
>>45321199
good luck m8, leave this shithole behind
>>45313824
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5vOHYuhvavA He just doesn't like Goblins.
Guy in our game became the goblin king and got to order his gobbo subjects around and fuck green shortstacks all day. Definitely the best course of events out of any of us.
>>45321835
Thank you good Anon, I love nothing more than NTR gone wrong
>>45312517
>you will never be a hunky human warrior
>you will never be hunky
>you will never be remotely attractive
>>45322936
Just be funny, I mean look at half of the hacks at RLM
>>45314244
>not knowing barbarians were well groomed as fuck
At one point a large amount of them got ambushed while they were dying their hair.
>>45318454
I didn't want to know that about short stacks. I just like them, I don't need any justification beyond that.
>>45322978
>>45322936
>>45312517
>>45323268
That's a boy.
>>45323346
You got some kind of problem with that?
>>45313912source?
>>45322936
Look, being /fit/ nowadays is something more autistic. Unless you're an athlete or a weight lifter, the only reason you'd have all that muscle would be to look good, and the only reason you put all those hours into it would be for vanity.
>>45323346
That's not a problem.
>>45323268
>>45323346
>tfw no qt3.14 goblin trap gf
Why even live?
>>45323427
Or because you enjoy exercise. It is physically rewarding in and of itself once you start gaining momentum.
>>45312517
>you will never disregard them so that you can go top your goblin bros
>>45323447
I could say the same thing about eating or drinking or studying obscure history.
>>45323427
Or to fight depression
Or to push your own limits
Or to build confidence
Or to feel good with your own body
>>45323497
You can do that a lot of other ways. The point really is you shouldn't feel bad if you're not /fit/, because being /fit/ means different things than it would have back in the day where people were physically hitting each other.
>>45323530
>implying people still arent physically hitting each other
It also has the benefit of letting you eat more food without turning into a great fat lump.
>>45323530
>actually trying to prove that it's not a good idea to get in shape
C'mon /tg/, I know that we have a reputation to uphold, but really?
>>45323530
when the issue is your body, patching it up in another way won't really solve it and will actually bring further problems as you'd keep ignore the core issue.
Just go ahead and work out, it's not hard.
>>45323563
Well it's not so much how much you eat as much as what you eat, but that's true.
>>45323585
Guy was feeling sad he wasn't a hunky warrior. Being in shape is a lot different than being a hunk.
>>45323596
Okay, maybe you feel bad about your body. But would working out and getting fit really help with interacting with people if you still have trouble with social situations? It might even make you feel less confident because you know people expect more of you now that you look different physically.
>>45323497
>Or to fight depression
>Or to build confidence
I tried that, but I felt it was pretty pointless. Does it really matter if you're a fat miserable loser or a fit miserable loser?
>>45323648
>Guy was feeling sad he wasn't a hunky warrior. Being in shape is a lot different than being a hunk.
>>45322936
>>you will never be remotely attractive
>>45323648
>But would working out and getting fit really help with interacting with people if you still have trouble with social situations? I
I found it did back in the good old days when I was fit. easier to talk to people when you feel better about yourself. Also though it might be dickish to say its easier to feel confident when you are bigger and stronger than most of the people in the room.
>>45323497
>needing muscles to be confident or happy
>basing your self-worth on your appearance
>not relying on your skills, knowledge, or relationships with other people
I get basing a little bit of it on appearance, but there's so much more than that.
>>45323653
Fun fact: Exercise in the right scenario, that is repeatedly performed with regularity, can actually result in the release of endorphins which aid in the alleviation of depression, even if only for short periods around the instance of exercise. This is why people can get addicted to it.
I actually used that as a character concept once. Played a barbarian that had been depressed and edgy (he cut ''so he could feel something'' among other things). Working out had made him fit and helped him manage his depression but he was still an edgy cunt. He attributed his rage ability to the ability to draw power from his pain.
>>45323648
>But would working out and getting fit really help with interacting with people if you still have trouble with social situations?
In my experience it helped a lot.
>>45323758
Exercise really is one of the best ways to deal with stress.
>>45323346
>Not wanting a qt trap.
What are you a faggot?
>>45323653
I was 60lbs overweight. My feat were killing me, my back hurt, my knees hurt, hell, everything sucked. I lost 40 of it last year, and most of that pain is gone.
Yes. It's worth it to loose the weight, not for depression, not because it will magically turn you handsome, but because all those aches and pains will dissapear. Best. Feeling. Ever.
>>45323774
Ive also found masturbation to be useful as well. Also a pretty good sleep aid.
Ive yet to make a character centred around that though.
>>45323776
>being a memefag
Kill urself
>>45323720
It certainly helps and really isn't that hard to do.
>>45323648
>Well it's not so much how much you eat as much as what you eat, but that's true.
fit here.
this is the exact opposite of the truth
you can eat like shit, as long as you're eating at a surplus/deficit.
for example, cookies/cakes or mcdonalds are a great way to get enough calories, and high fat/low carbs is great for cutting.
>>45323843
How effective is Human Growth Hormone as a ''supplement''?
Im thinking of having a hulking hurler type character in a modern campaign and I want to try for semi realism. I feel like HGH would be the fastest method for a fa/tg/uy to achieve hulk mode but Im not too educated on the topic.
>>45323758
I didn't really feel different at all. I felt bored while doing it and the same as always when I returned home. Eventually I figured it was cheaper to just not bother.
>>45323785
Meh, I'm in no great pain.
>>45323720
>you can't be proud of the result of your workouts
>improving your body isn't another skill to hone
You sound like a pretty stereotypical nerd
>>45323788
>Bard who has to get off before bed or else he/she suffers from insomnia
>>45323484
Sure. Do what works for you, man, I'm not here to tell you how to live your life.
>>45323932
See, going to the gym is one mistake. Why should you pay those cunts when you dont need to? Get some fucking bags of sugar, use those.
Beyond that, sticking with it and doing it to a high level of effectiveness are the important parts. Like, I have honestly noticed major improvements in my mood when I was going hard with exercising and major deterioration when I stop.
It takes roughly 4 weeks to notice a change in yourself like. It can also take a while for the mood boost to occur. But if you push yourself consistently and train dynamically, you can get some good results.
Personally, I like it just for the confidence it affords me. Im not massively built but I know what I can do with what I have and I know I can defend myself well enough. Think about the average D&D barbarian or paladin, do you think they worry about running into Chad the bull from high school?
It isn't for everyone but it can be quite helpful if ya do it right and stick with it. Also, great stress relief as >>45323774 mentioned. Plus, there is something about certain parts of your brain kicking into overdrive when you're occupied with repetitive physical tasks so it can help with creativity. Like, if I hit an impasse while worldbuilding, I start doing minor exercises and mull it over until I have a fairly well fleshed out idea.
>>45323992
That... could work.
Now if only I can find a game to use them in.And someone else to run the game since Im forever DM
>>45323992
>everyone else just wants to sleep and will tell her to shut up if she asks if they could 'sleep together'
>>45323932
I had probably a half dozen constant aches that I didn't even realize were aches until they were gone.
>>45324040
>bags of sugar
A bodyweight routine can work better imo and you don't risk spilling it everywhere.
>>45324162
Yeah but ya still gotta buy em. I just wrap sugar bags with duct tape, hold em in my hands and do dynamic stuff usually. Lunges, calf raises, that sort of thing.
Im a big fan of step exercises. Ive been wondering about running a character that uses incredible jumps to their advantage in combat, probably they jump over enemies to lance them or something, but 5e doesn't have charging rules to the best of my knowledge and my group is only barely knowledgeable about 5e...
>>45324216
>5e jumps
With a running start, you can jump your strength score horizontally, or your strength modifier vertically. When doing high jumps, add 1.5x your height to determine how high your hands can reach.
Say your PC is 6 feet tall with 16 strength
>horizontal jump: 16 feet (3 squares) with running start. 8 feet (1 square) without.
>vertical jump: 3 feet with running start, can reach 12 feet off ground (2 squares). Without running start, 1.5 feet and reach 10.5 feet (2 squares) off ground.
It's useful for movement, but you don't get advantage or anything for jumping at someone before an attack. You do get cool points for it, however.
>>45324484
Vertical jump should actually be [3+strength modifier] feet
>>45324484
Hmm. I forget offhand, is jumping an action or a movement?
Im thinking of using jumps to position myself in flanking positions (the argument being that someone attacking from a diagonal upwards while another engages from the front could be considered flanking) but I dunno.
Cool points are always good though. A parkour focused shanker could be fun in the right campaign
>>45324216
>you'll never have a dragoon as in Final Fantasy
>>45324589
Worst part is the only other member of my party thats got mediocre knowledge of other settings ran a warlock focused around the same idea but using teleports in 4e so even if I find a way to pull it off it'll just be like Im ripping off his idea.
>>45324576
>is jumping an action or a movement?
Jumping, like climbing or swimming, is movement, not an action. If my PC tries to jump 10 feet horizontally, he needs to spend 10 feet of movement. Climbing and swimming have different movement costs, but work on the same principle.
For style, you don't even need to go Assassin's Creed on it. I played a strength fighter, and simply jumped when it seemed appropriate or cool. Sometimes my GM would grant advantage or inspiration for things like riding a Gust of Wind into an attack, or describing an overhead swing after ramping off a table.
>>45324987
Yeah, good points.
Im liking the idea of playing an assassins creed style fighter actually. Hopping walls, dashing along rooftops and jumping people to shank them but having the ability to get in a drag out fight if needed.
Pity Id be restricted in scope to some degree. Parkour-stabber doesnt play well in deserts or underwater. Or most non-urban locations
>>45325065
If you don't have anything to jump off of, just be a little more smooth and agile, moving around your enemy, dodging, and deflecting.
>>45321071
yeah
>>45323720
so you're fat?
>>45323409
here you gohttp://g.e-hentai.org/g/516838/d5580abae8/
>>45323021
Serves them right, having bad hair in the first place.
>>45318454
Pretty sure you just made that up. Maybe try talking out of your arsehole less in future.
>>45323427
Your bitter envy is REALLY transparent.
>>45329688
I don't envy others, anon.
I hate myself.
There's a big difference.
>>45312517
>your orc wife will never get jealous and possessive when she sees you working with Goblin women
>"guess you like anything green huh?"
>>45323720
People who do not put effort into their own allowances to look good are shit people.
Fast people are not fat because they are hard working.
>>45312517
Well you can at least be hunky.
Start lifting.
How come nobody has mentioned the "gains goblin"?
>>45330181
ain't nobody here /fit/ bruh
>>45320881
Not even interracial.
It's interspecies.
>>45330936
link?
>>45318454
>thick, short girls
>a species that is considered by the majority to be comprised of ugly, vulgar, bumbling nincompoops
>tumblr draws them sexy with pink sidecuts
I think I'm starting to see why this fantasy race resonates with tumblr so much...Not that I'm complaining, since I actually loved sidecuts (particularly on post-apoc punk girls) long before the hairstyle got attributed to tumblr, and I still do despite their best efforts, and I love sexy monster girls, goblins most definitely included.
>>45312517
Had a barbarian that was interested in the goblin tribes that raided some of the local villages.
He started asking as to why they did so, and even caught a few to question himself
Didn't really expect him to do that but I ran with it. Had the gobs tell him they were part of a broken tribe that fell from the main one after a civil war of dominance. Now the goblin tribes were all scattered about trying to stake some land and food for themselves
I basically brewed him up a sidequest where he established himself as the goblin tribe leader. By endgame he'd reformed all the goblin tribes and was often referred to as Papa Gob, or just Pops by the goblins
>>45323497
What a cute dog :3
>>45323427
>You will never be able to run as fast or as far as me
High laugh, you internet nerd
>>45312517
He's pretty much naked
>Every so often goblin groups try to get a human to live with them at least for awhile, since they need to thin out the bloodline every few generations and some half-humans in the tribe is a big benefit
>Human whose job description is to live with the goblin group and be treated relatively well, while regularly reproducing with them to bring in a fresh mix of genes and intelligence
Magical realm, but best profession or whatever you want to call it, that I've seen in any of our games.
>>45321071
In my setting, no. The various orcoid species can't grow facial hair, and their jealousy is what causes them to attack humans. Dwarves grow long beards only to mock the orcs an goblins, which is why they're constantly at war, and why chin-scalping (or whatever the right word is) is a mark of status among orcs. The more beards you have claimed, the higher your status. Humans can trade with orcs, but must grow beards first, then shave them at the edge of orc territory and burn the hair, so the orcs can see they reject the mocking ways of the dwarves. Because elves don't grow facial hair, the orcs never fight them, and the two races interact peacefully.
>>45337163
That sounds stupid but I love it.
>>45323427
>If you work out and aren't a pro you do it for vanity
What is arhete?
Seriously, I am getting really pissed off about this shitty utilitarian mindset.
>>45337163
>frontier town on human-orc border
>has a strict no facial hair policy in order to maintain piece with the other side
>all adventurers going through are required to shave or be run out of town
>>45337163
>>45337213
>a dwarf has suffered a terrible smithing accident and almost fell face first into molten metal
>lower half still got horribly burned
>he survived but scar tissue can't regrow the beard
>shunned by his own kind, he had grown hateful enough to turn to their ancestral enemies
>>45337241
What about that one elfguy cursed with having a permanent pornstache?
![[HorribleSubs] Hai to Gensou no Grimgar - 01 [720p].mkv_snapshot_21.06_[2016.01.17_15.48.54].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/ynzmGdm.jpg "[HorribleSubs] Hai to Gensou no Grimgar - 01 [720p].mkv_snapshot_21.06_[2016.01.17_15.48.54].jpg")
>>45312568
>Not wanting chilling out with your gobo friends
