In this thread we talk about some of the absolute worst players we've played with, and hopefully stories of them getting rekt.
>Playing D&D one night
>Beta friend brings his gf
>tumblr. made. manifest.
>The dyed hair, problem glasses, overweight, the works
>The entire game she tries to overthrow le patriarchy, going into unnecessary detail about how her armor isn't sexy and that she's enlightened because she went to a sophisticated mage school to know more about the world and see through the lies
>The DM is visibly rustled but he's keeping his cool
>Eventually we arrive at an Elven kingdom, where the Queen is giving us the quest's deets on behalf of the King who is negotiating with another Kingdom
>tumblrtard actually tries to tell the Elven queen, surrounded by wealth and servants beyond count, that she is oppressed, and that she should stage a palace coup-de-grace against the king to have it become a matriarchy.
>roll for charisma
>1.
>The DM looks her in the eyes and gives her a gigantic, shit-eating 'you're fucked now' grin worthy of Jetstream Fucking Sam.
>The Elven Queen proceeds to say that she's never heard anything so incredibly, moronically incorrect in all of her years, and that such thoughts could only come from a mind broken beyond repair
>For the saftey of her kingdom and kingdoms everywhere, the Queen declares her legally insane and to be institutionalized in the asylum immediately
>She then tells the rest of the party that attempting to disobey the royal order will be treated as an act of war and she'll turn the army against them if they attempt to interfere
>Nobody objects
>The Queen gives the party the quest and the party hires a mage to compensate for losing tumblrtard
>She sits there sulking for the rest of game night
That wasn't the last time she was at game night either.
>>44724752
This one time I played with OP. He was and still is a shitty player.
>>44724752
Give us more, man. You can't leave us hanging like a dog from a tree like that.
>Things that didn't happen - Your made-up Stories
>>44724752
>institutionalized
>not executed immediately for actively plotting against he crown and the queen's own beloved husband
If you're going to make shit up for a storytime thread, at least put some effort into it.
>>44724830
this wtf
thought your story had a decent climax but the resolution was a total flop
>>44724752
Cool story, bro. Tell us more about this make believe group you play with.
>>44724752
Try harder
>>44725206
I fail to see the point of making up gaming stories.
Op is an epic faggot.
>>44725110
>last game session
>player brings 11 hookers with him
>we had a great game, and got blowjobs
>shit was cash
>true story.
Not OP here, but I once had a chick in my gaming group that got fed up with all the rulers being male lords or kings or what not. That the elves were a matriarchy wasn't enough for her.
It got so bad that the group actually fell apart because of her complaining.
>>44724830
To be fair, she does sound totally fucking insane.
>>44724752
I had a dungeon master trying to get all of our characters to fuck for no reason other than he thought it was a good idea.
>>44724752
>she should stage a palace coup-de-grace against the king
You mean a coup d'etat, right?
>>44725395
two per player and three for the dm?
>>44725834
I think he's just an idiot
>>44725861
Um, ya.
Also, Jeff bridges stopped by to do some voices for us.
Keeping with the theme op set here.
>>44725404
See, at least the idiot in pic related set out to do something about it in-character, rather than whine at the DM for the patriarchal world they've created.
It's called roleplaying, people.
>>44724752
>Shit that never happened.
Dude, you're not even trying.
>>44725573
Elaborate plaz.
>>44724752
This bait isn't even good.
>>44724830
Lunacy is not a crime.
Plus nuthouses are a fate worse then death...
>>44724752
That's bullshit but I believe you
>>44724752
>never played any /tg/ game
>noone in the entire country does
>meets some animu fan in local meet at a restaurant
>be silent most of the time
>suddenly , suggest them playing some rpg
>baffled look.jpg
>try to show some shit I downloaded from /tg/ and web
>ask about vidya they play
>know jrpg and Computer games like fallout,mass effect and skyrim
>explains them TTRPG is their forefather
>not amused.jpg
>"It seems boring anon, we would rather play vidya"
>tfw you will never play any tabletop game
>tfw no one is there to dare entering my magical realm
>tfw you will just read the fluff and download more shit and jack off to milf hentai
It sucks to be in 3rd world country.
>>44727970
Online play?
What the fuck are problem glasses ?
>>44727970
>tfw you will just read the fluff and download more shit and jack off to milf hentai
Sorry to tell you this but that isn't just your country, thats life.
>>44724752
>I'll take "things that never happened" for $300 Alex
>>44728013
They pierce the veil of the false reality our collective conciousness has plastered over the True Reality. Its what hides the monsters that are men and shows how womyn are actually all beautiful, strong independent goddesses all their own. You must but wear them and believe.
>>44727970
If you have the web, you have access to gaming sites. Roll20 is a mixed bag, but it is somewhere to start.
>>44728000
>>44728066
Other anon and I am also interested in online.
What are some good places apart from one you mentioned?
>Playing a 1500 point Warhammer 40k game
>Friend plays Tau
>Brings 3 Stormsurges
I'm not playing with him anymore.
