/heem/: capeshit edition
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UPCOMING EVENTS (April):
4/2 - WSOF 30 (Branch vs Starks)
(((PRELIMS START AT 8:00 PM ET, 5:00 PM PT, 1:00 AM BST)))
4/8 - Legacy FC 53 (Lima vs. Trocoli)
4/10 - UFC FN 86 (Rothwell vs Dos Santos)
4/15 - ONE FC Global Rivals (Askren vs Aleksakhin)
4/15 - Glory 29 (Holzken vs Kongolo)
4/16 - UFC on Fox 19 (Nurmagomedov vs Ferguson)
4/16 - Lellator 152 (Freire vs Campos)
4/17 - Rizin 1 (Fujita vs Prochazka)
4/20 - TUF Season 23 Premier
4/22 - Lellator 153 (Koreshkov vs Henderson)
4/23 - UFC 197 (Johnson vs Cejudo)
4/27 - TUF Season 23 EP 2
4/30 - Titan FC 38 (Carl vs Muhammad)
NEWS:
>DC IS OUT, SUCC POSTPONED (could be an april fool's day joke)
http://www.mmafighting.com/2016/4/1/11351428/daniel-cormier-injured-out-of-ufc-197-rematch-against-jon-jones
>Cyborg talks about Dana White, Ronda Rousey
http://www.mmafighting.com/2016/4/2/11346626/cris-cyborg-talks-relationship-with-dana-white-says-ronda-rousey
>Max Holloway taks about jumping weight classes
http://www.mmafighting.com/2016/4/2/11339508/max-holloway-is-cool-with-conor-mcgregor-jumping-weight-classes-on
INFORMATION OF NOTE:
Lawler, RDA, Tate don't have fights scheduled, "multiple title fights" mentioned for UFC 200
All Australians are kangaroos
First for schaub
2nd for me
>/r/mma hates McGoat now
3rd for being shocked at someone from AKA getting injured
4th for Bethe
does anyone have a stream for the Polaris main card?
>>66540561
They'll all be over him again and claiming they new he's win when he heems Nate stiff
DC's Batman Vs Superman was out this week and so was DC Daniel Cormier
It was a sign mates we didn't pay attention
>>66540571
hahahaaa bethe... oh bethe...
>>66540693
>>66540693
all this flavors...
anyway, we have wsof tonight
>CONFIRMED
CONFIRMED
>CONFIRMED
CONFIRMED
cap my prediction
>>66540788
>Rogan vs Goldberg
>Not rogan vs Diaz
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LBAvo-bRKUY
goddamn lads
i'm trying to plan a US roadtrip
no idea in terms of good routes the time it'd take
what's a good source of info for this kind of stuff
>>66540500
>that webm
That's a from a UFC too I think. Seriously go to /asp/
>>66540561
It's a natural reaction. The Irish fags were swarming heem threads like cockroaches, being cocky as fuck, acting like McGoobs was king shit and would never lose, calling him the greatest ever...
This is what happens. You remember the night he lost? There were literally hundreds of threads across like 6 different boards making fun of him and the Irish in general. If they'd been less uppity about this shit, probably no one would've cared, but the more cocky you are, the more shit you talk, the bigger the backlash is gonna be when you get shitkicked.
Be humble, McGregor fans. He will lose again. Maybe not to Nate, but it'll happen sooner or later. When it does, your actions now will decide how hard we're gonna meme on you.
>>66540898
apehoop and povertyball belong on /asp/
>>66540829
Anyone else think this time Diaz will avoid pouncing on McGregor when he inevitably panic wrestles and instead make him get back up so he can heem him properly?
>>66540919
Want to make some money?
McGregor 1st round KO.
Mark my words.
I think he has really changed guys
>>66540857
>Rogan commentating during his own fight
Jon Bones Jones @JonnyBones 28s28 seconds ago
I don't wish injuries on anyone, I hope you have a healthy recovery Daniel. Enjoy that belt
26 retweets 29 likes
>tfw 3 month until the meme end
Hope you enjoyed it lads.
Jared Rosholt
>>66540974
Except he tried that last time and couldn't. But yeah, this time it'll happen because Nate's chin will be worn down from having a full camp this time.
>>66541006
If you're not from the UK, or Ireland, then don't say lads, you weirdo.
>>66540994
>not taking alpha brain
Cormier is a piece of shit chicken nigger
>>66541007
le cut man
>>66540990
Protip: Jon Jones is a sociopath. He does not give a single fuck about other people and doesn't think the rules apply to him. This is blatantly obvious.
>>66541006
The meme already ended, Uncle Dana just doesn't want to admit it.
>>66540974
Genuinely curious how you think that's going to happen considering his utter lack of success trying exactly that last time
>>66541089
>Uncle Dana
The man is redpilled as fuck, he understands that memes come and go and there's no guarantees.
>>66541069
I think he is being sincere this time
>>66541122
Movement. Duh.
>>66541007
>Gets cut after losing one fight while on a 3 fight win streak
>Big foot is 1-4-1 in his last 6 and still not fired
>>66541185
Bigfoot's fights are usually fun. Rosholt's fights are always complete and utter shit and completely suck the life out of any card he's on.
>>66541240
No longer april 1st
Can Mark Hunt unironically become champ?
He;s 3-3-1 in his last 7 fights but his only loses are to JDS, Stipe and Werdum basically the best guys in the world
>>66541240
>>66541240
Thank you based mod.
Ariel Helwani @arielhelwani 48s48 seconds ago
Brendan Scaub in talks of finalising a mutli-fight contract with Bellator.
13 retweets 22 likes
>>66541312
fuck tattoos
>>66541372
Who cares
>>66540905
can't help but to "rousey" for "mcgregor" for your post
>>66541411
>Who cares
Fight fans.
People who enjoy watching Brendan Schaub get heemed.
Brian Callaway.
Me.
>>66541280
HW are a clusterfuck, he could heem every there
>>66541372
>48s48 seconds ago
nigga you need to step your game up
>>66541136
I think so too. He turned a new leaf after his tragic accident and he's really setting an example for other UFC fighters to follow.
Alrighty, done my 4 hour rapping session
How many bongs to tonight's event?
12 bings to Polaris maincard
>>66541591
bings?
DC should be stripped of the title and they should just give it back to Jones.
>>66541619
10 bings
>>66541372
I just watched his statement on jre again
>I'm so successful I can't concentrate on fighting
Maybe he got a lot of push from contractors and could pull 1 mil in sponsorship money if he is allowed to print shit on his fat ass.
>>66541640
What the heck is a bing?
tecia kinda looks like a ninja turtle
>>66541666
It means lurk more, faggot.
>>66541666
lad
>>66541666
fuck off newfag
>>66541684
cool internet culture, dork
>>66541719
>>66541582
IGNORE THIS POST, MY COMPUTER'S CLOCK IS 2 HOURS FAST
6 bongs 35 bings
>>66541582
get a nose job it's awful
>>66541752
5 bongs
>>66541433
They both work. What do hey have in common? A ridiculous, way over-the-top amount of hype/shilling from the jewfc, and a shitton of fairweather bandwagon casual fans claiming them to be the literal greatest ever.
Same thing happened to Ronda when she got heem'd, too. Hundreds of threads, tons of people laughing and talking shit.
This is why the UFC's current strategy of marketing it's "stars" is bad. They don't give us legit fan favorites anymore, they take fighters who are "marketable" and cram them down our throats until everyone is sick of them and just wants them to go away. They create bubbles of popularity that are very fragile, one loss and the casuals jump ship and the hardcores point and laugh at how dumb the casuals are.
People loved Chuck and Randy and GSP and even Tito's goofy ass. They were legitimate stars who established themselves with their personalities and their actions. Ronda and McGoobs only have staying power as long as they're winning.
>>66541800
bings and bongs, what a bunch of nerds, i'm sure you're all fighters in real life
>>66541666
Like a bong, but shorter
anybody has a stream for Polaris?
>>66541672
Her and Dodson should have babies. They'd legit be born with shells.
gib polaris stream plox + heemspeaky anyone
>>66541819
I bet I could take you down
Beets days are numbered
>>66540905
tbf all of heem, besides like 3 guys (including lithcuck) who actually predicted what would happen, picked mcgoober
everyone was acting like nate was some bum and had no chance
>>66541916
tbf, 90% of heem is retarded and just parrots what everyone else in the thread is saying to look cool
will mcgregor be a gatekeeper by the end of 2017?
>>66541916
i picked nate but predictioncuck didn't add me because i called him a faggot
>>66541953
He'll be a belt keeper when he has both the 155 title and 170 at the same time
>>66541916
check my picks
>>66541916
What are you talking about I alone had Diaz on 3 of my submissions.
>>66541948
>i'm smart
>everyone else is dumb
>>66541916
>this revisionist history
Lol
>>66541372
>Schaub gets heemed so hard he has to give up his shitty podcast as well
I'm okay with this
>>66542013
HAVE I BEEN WRONG YET
PREDICTION BRO POST THE FUCKING HOLLY HOLM RONDA ROUSEY HEEM PREDICTIONS
>>66541916
Speak for yourself, pleb.
>>66541948
That couldn't be more wrong. Everyone is deliberately contrarian and confrontational and angry
>>66541953
At 145, probably not. Aldo looks to be declining, plus USADA, Mendes has a deleted chin, pretty much Edgar is the only guy who's a really significant threat, and he has a ton of mileage on him. 145 is pretty weak, I think he can stay champ there.
If he moves up to 155, yeah, he's a gatekeeper at best. You saw what Nate did, image he was in there with Khabib or RDA or Ferguson, he'll even Alvarez or Melendez. Pettis is probably a bad fight for him too, and cowboy might give him fits with his length.
>>66542062
4plebs.org
Do it yourself you bum
>>66542013
>I unironically picked McGregor
hmmm.. maybe I should off myself
Post times you won
i remember i did my predictions with this picture (related) but prediction bro didn't add me
>>66540990
>>66540996
Confirmed then?
Well shit. How terrible. Literally ass. Was looking forward to that fight quite a bit, what a crock of bullshit. Was looking quite forward to the fight, would have been fun shit
>>66542109
call me a bum again and I'll heem you into next year pussy
>>66541908
never
>>66542128
You're a bum.
>>66542112
Literally never
>>66542112
Still buttmad about that one lad, Pickett definitely lost.
>>66542124
Celibacy
>>66542124
No thanks.
>>66542124
either 2nd from the left or the far right one, otherwise you are a true cuck.
>>66542112
>tfw never won
I would have one that one if it wasn't for the judges robbing Rivera
>>66542112
>tfw two wins
We Rumble now !
http://www.bjpenn.com/mma-news/jon-jones/report-ufc-offers-anthony-johnson-fight-with-jon-jones-at-ufc-197/
>>66542212
>thinking Jones will take that fight
He was too scared to fight Chael on short notice
>>66542248
Well, it would've been the biggest mistake of his entire life.
any polaris 3 streams?
>>66542248
NOT THE NEW JONES
https://www.instagram.com/p/BDtOEqDsDIL/
>>66542309
+1 need stream
>>66542212
>mfw Rumble knocks out DC with an uppercut 3 minutes into the 1st round
>>66542321
And when he finds out its Rumble
>Muh muh injury i forgot to tell everyone about
>>66542321
my boi
>>66542321
>inb4 he deletes it just out of habit
>>66542373
Yeah man, he made that video forgetting about the top contender in his division that he was already scheduled to fight at one point.
So... CHUCK LIDDELL CONFIRMED FOR SAVING 197?
>>66542321
Thats my man.
>>66542309
>>66542355
bump for polaris, hope paul harris gets heemed
>3 weeks till the Jones meme ends
>>66542451
Anderson is dropping out of his meme fight with Uriah for a bigger meme fight with jones.
>>66542469
If Rumble were to heem him, he'd forever be my bull
Who is the biggest draw at LHW/HW right now, aside from Jones?
>>66542451
Oh lord I would love this. I've actually hated Chuck for almost a fucking decade now. I would love to see this junkie get absolutely destroyed again by Jon Jones.
>>66542451
Goddamn... what would even happen if fat, coked-up, hasn't trained in years Chuck did step in and KOd DC. I think Dana would have a simultaneous orgasm and heart attack.
>>66542509
Unironically probably Rashad
>>66542509
Overeem?
>>66542509
Fedor.
>people ITT think Rumble would beat Jones
lmao
>>66542521
>>66542365
Guys, Jon isn't the one who is pulled from the fight.
>>66542469
>He thinks JBJ is taking a short notice replacement fight
>>66542509
The actual answer is sadly and unironically Kimbo Slice.
>>66542571
I'm retarded. I meant Jones, tbqh lad.
>>66542559
Jon likes to beat guys at there own game so he'd probably try to heem Rumble and get sleepied
>>66542013
OH WOW SOMEONE PICKED DIAZ ON THE PREDICTIONS
not like everyone doesnt put in 10 picks with every combination of picks possible
>>66542622
>he picked Conor
Loving
Every
Laugh
>>66542610
>he'd probably try to heem Rumble and get sleepied
Or he could go the travis browne route and just poke his eyes til he cant see shit and then heem him
>>66542622
>not like everyone doesnt put in 10 picks with every combination of picks possible
>>66542610
He would probably hold rumble against the cage, beat him up in the clinch and drag him to the mat for the first round then sub him in the second via RNC. JBJ has all the tools to implement the gameplan for beating Rumble.
anyone got the pics of /heem/'s bull?
i'm craving some sexual chocolate
>>66542602
Kimbo is an attraction but not the kind you'd pay money to see
>>66542610
>Jon likes to beat guys at there own game
Oh he does? Can you cite an example? No, you can't? You were just making shit up? Oh ok.
*Mighty mouse laughing at the distance*
manlets always win.
>>66542651
i picked nate u goof, unironically
>>66542735
>Oh he does? Can you cite an example? No, you can't? You were just making shit up? Oh ok.
Are you taking the piss lad?
>>66542758
Then what are you crying about? You think you're the only person to pick Nate?
>>66542756
why is he laughing at the distance?
>>66542823
He'll be the main event now.
>>66542774
Everyone see how this faggot cant back up his claim?
So, it looks like his next fight will be his last in the UFC. I have no doubt he will end up in bellator afterwards.
http://www.mmafighting.com/2016/4/2/11321392/on-last-fight-of-his-contract-dan-henderson-hoping-to-remain-with-the
>>66542756
>MM headlines PPV
>PPV now does utter dogshit because noone watches
>MM loses out on a decent payday
Why is he laughing exactly?
>>66542797
i'm not crying about shit bro, all i said was that all of /heem/ was riding conor's nuts hard and acting like nate was a bum and u goofs took it from there
>>66542853
Questionable. I would be surprised to see them keep JBJ in the mainevent. They already set the precedent with 196 of having a non title fight as the headline. Also, the NSAC only give exemptions to make a non title fight a fiver rounder if it is the mainevent.
Conor vs Jones for the heavyweight interim belt
>>66542822
i meant the one /heem/er from PA
that's helpful too tho
>>66542868
hendo vs ffedor 2 pls in a ring
is conduit a meme fighter?
>>66542013
>McGregor by having camp longer than 12 days
Oh boy
>>66542903
That's not really true though.
>>66542868
Hendo returning to the loving embrace of Scott Coker <3
>>66542953
it was a foregone conclusion in /heem/ that conor was gonna win
Post your bulls lads
>>66542997
lel
My dad text me saying "gsp vs bj penn at ufc 200". I freaked out and jumped online to check. Fuck April fools, it's the worst holiday in existence.
>>66543012
Heem him
>>66542248
>thinking "true form" JBJ will run
heem yourself, lad
http://mmajunkie.com/2016/04/michael-bisping-wants-ufc-title-shot-not-a-cheating-non-english-speaking-boring-opponent
>>66542321
the conor mcgregor effect
So which Heavyweight can Jon fight at UFC 197?
>>66543048
give him jones at 197
Snap City
>>66543003
It was a forgone conclusion in the mind of some people that shitpost here, sure. It wasn't a unanimous opinion, idiots just tend to be the loudest.
>>66541908
Big Bad Beetlejuice will destroy Kosal "Mini" Baba. Mark my words he'll go down in the 1st. No one can take the left hand shot. Plus if you think that can beat this you're out of your mind.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cnqFOcafDik
>>66543083
Drinking alone is pretty bad
>>66543129
no its not you fucking goof
>>66541046
fuck you, lad
>>66543129
>Alone
>implying my heem bros arn't here
>>66541046
LADS
A
D
S
>>66541046
dont tell me what to do bud
What's going through DC's head?
>>66543129
how old are you. you are either 19 or 50
>>66539871
>>66539910
>>66539912
>>66539949
>Implying I wanked to arriany
Fit girls, big titty bbws and some rough deepthroats to finish it off.
>>66543129
Time and space are illusions. We are never alone.
Why does gus have a black spade tattoo?
inb4 "cuck"
>>66543304
it's to remind him of how many black men he's been with
>>66543256
damn, what happened to him at the end?
>>66543376
TKO Leg kicks
I have a theory. UFC asked Cormier to pull out because they want to move Jones vs dc to ufc 200. They saw that fans weren't happy with the card so far and decided to make a crazy move. Jones will be fed a can to show that he's still scary and to build hype. Jones will call out DC during his post fight speech and tell him to get ready for 200.
>>66543423
JBJ vs Krylov!
Is it happening?
>yfw UFC 200 Co-Main is Fedor vs Jon Jones
>>66543423
Lawler vs Condit 2 will also be on UFC 200, if Jones vs DC was on there, it would be the card of the century
>>66543487
The rep deleted the tweet lol
https://mobile.twitter.com/DeniseWhite_EAG/status/716329465140252672
Jones vs Rumble confirmed
>>66543487
Jones via R3 sub after Rumble inevitably gasses.
These shit fights make you appreciate the UFC more
>holly will never be your training sis
>tfw no Polaris stream
>>66543368
so 4?
>>66543585
what shit fights?
>>66543590
Did they FUCK
>>66543079
ayyy, what a jerk
shoulda tapped tho
my god. finally jones will get HEEMED
>>66543487
haha Jones finally getting HEEMED, his low fight IQ and ego will get the better of him and he will stand and trade with Rumble and we know how that ends. Even if he want to take Rumble down it will be hard, Rumble has good TDD and Cormier is a much offensive wrestler than Jones so it will be hard to dictate where the fight takes place. Rumble 1st round HEEM.
I miss the names, bring them back dammit
>>66543590
holly and her fucking steroid abuse
>>66543755
calm down sally
>>66543783
shutup Francine
>>66543729
jon is going to run through him mate
fuck there will be no good banter between the two
>>66540905
>>66541916
You're both full of shit.
>Jones has low fight iq
Top cakes familia
>>66543813
how exactly? Rumble is the better striker and MUCH harder hitter, Jones can only wreslte him but as I said Rumble has good TDD and Jones isn't as good of an offensive wrestler as DC.
Why doesn't JBJ have knockout power in a 205lbs weight class?
3 eyepokes in the second round from jones, screencap my post
>>66543825
3/06/16
nice try artem
lol jon literally memes on Crumble as DC sits there with his fake belt
>>66543825
is mcmeme a meme fighter?
>>66543877
capped and checked
>>66543729
>>66542610
Youre an idiot.
>>66543877
eyepokes only make Rumble stronger, we saw that against Gus.
>>66543868
because he is a meme fighter that relies on his size too much, he would be top 5 HW at best
>The rumble will beat Jones meme is alive again
Feels like I took a trip back to a year ago.
30 hops a day minimum
>high test brit trolling for (You)s
>>66543985
don't forget kangaroo steaks
>people not remember how fucking good jon jones is
Is rumble a bitch made nigger?
>>66543878
>doesn't understand time zones
>>66543729
>his low fight IQ
(You)
>>66544038
Who was his toughest opponent?
What was his best win?
UFC 197
Jones vs Hunt
Book it
It seems like Pettis is training at Jackson Winks a lot more lately. Will be good for him.
>>66544038
the skill gap isn't that high between him, Gustaffson, DC and Rumble. They all would have a decent chance of beating each other at any given time.
>>66543868
He doesn't fight that way? He has more submissions than KOs. He's clearly more of a TKO fighter.
>>66544141
Holy fuck I'd actually really like to see that.
>>66544038
>le beat up old MW man
Jon "totally not a meme fighter" Jones
Hopefully Rockhold gets injured, that rematch is fucking shit.
>>66544065
AHAHAHAHAHA
Dana's face when Mighty Manlet headlines 197 and breaks the lowest selling ppv record
>>66543942
What a dumb Reddit meme.
I say give Jones an easy winnable fight so that he can showcase his skills and get back in the groove and try to rebook the fight with DC for UFC 200.
Please keep this in mind before you meme
>>66544155
The skill gap is kind of huge considering Jones excels at pretty much everything he does. He might win by smaller margins, but that's true of any champion in a decent weight class. The same reason why it's clear Anderson Silva was fighting bums and GSP is the GOAT.
>>66544304
is that Reebok Helium?
THIS IS THE FIGHT THE FANS HAVE BEEN BEGGING FOR
>>66544313
Latifi...
Anyone got a stream ready for today?
>>66544376
zzzzzzz
>>66542997
pfff hahaha
>>66544368
JBJ's boxing has always looked wonky "Magny-esque".
Rumble is smart, he knows he's not in 100% fighting shape so why blow his only chance to fight Jon on some bullshit 3 week camp? Literally no one else in the division will be beat him except for DC but that old fat fuck will be retiring after Jones rapes him again anyway.
>>66544376
ENGLAND'S OWN OVINCE ST PREUX
proper English lad, up for a fight whenever.
>mfw Gus steps in and saves the card
S P I C Y
P
I
C
Y
>>66544368
he has shit tier boxing and no power
Did DC injury himself try to come up with better banter than "You said I should suck your dick, Jon. Tell the folks you said I should suck your dick."?
>>66544464
It's that northern working class spirit
>Am I the biggest pussy you've ever met and do you want me to suck your dick Jon? Just like you told me?
>>66544314
Kenflo whiteknighting for his fox sports buddy.
AKA fighters get injured all the time. DC is an old man who shouldnt even be fighting anymore.
>>66544376
I might be in the minority here but I would like to see that fight
>>66544368
>Put your hand on the forehead of the opponent
>Start fingerbanging their eye like it's the hole of a teenage virgin before the dicking
Truly world class striking.
>>66544376
>from possibly Rumble to Ovince St Preux in a few hours
>implying the Rumble fight was ever even a possibility
If this fight happens Jones will obviously kill him then act all high and mighty because he was willing to fight the replacement on 3 weeks notice. Fuckin jews
>>66544511
You know how camgirls will try to deepthroat larger and larger dildos until they go too far and tear their esophagus?
It's like that I think
God damn people on YouTube are real weirdos.
>>66544741
Link
>>66544781
http://youtu.be/cPwTUM31hV0
I blame Dana for not giving me a weekly card to fill the void that is my """"life"""""
>>66544901
jesus christ was he trying to kill the motherfucker
>>66544901
We need to get that ref into the ufc, someone tell the comission that we want him.
>>66544314
When you're at the pinnacle of the sport people don't view you as simply human, they expect you to be indestructible as far as injuries go, and they have every right to do so. Not to mention that the money they spend on PPV goes directly into DC's pocket. The fans should be giving shit to anyone who's training at an unsafe monkey gym and injures himself to everyone's surprise.
>>66544901
That ref needs to be in the UFC. Top tier right there.
TIME TO END THIS SUFFERING
>>66544901
Kebab removed
>>66544877
I watched it earlier today. Can't believe anyone would find his costume believable, not to mention the voice.
>>66544901
OPEN THE FRIDGE, HE'S OUT COLD
>>66544901
Herb deans father
Jones is very overrated, made his name by beating out of prime and undersized fighters. The moment he faced someone his own size he looked very ordinary. At HW, where he won't have as much size advantage, he would be top 5 at best.
>>66545073
Schaub would have fucked Jones up at LHW
>>66545102
Yeah yeah, elite striking highest grade jitz and the physique of an athlete Schaub is the best there is and ever was.
OSP has pretty good chance at Jones desu
He has weird unpredictable punches that pack immense power, and after getting wreslee fucked by Glover, is much better wrestler himself.
>>66544483
top kek
can't be mad
>>66544314
Whose tweet did he steal?
>>66544494
he's got good straight and dropped shogun with a bodyshot. who needs good boxing with the tools he has?
>>66544314
I think I've read that quote somewhere's else..
>>66545022
I NEED THE MEMES TO MYSELF
Are people seriously memeing that Jones isn't good?
>>66545389
so did I yours
>>66545198
Immense power with a unclean shots versus strong chin and evasive body doesn't mean much
Jon Jones wrestling and pressing up against you is far more different than Glover
>>66545459
so i can
shitpost
away
>>66544901
should have tapped
>>66545503
It's literally one britfag bating for (Yous)s
>>66545540
YOU WILL NEVER GET TO ME
>>66545590
Fuck off lad, I am the finest (You) merchant on here. I spend my day perfecting my shitposting strategy in order to maximise my (You) inflow.
>>66545650
I get more yous than all you chumps put together
This ones on the house, you need it a lot more than me
>yfw OSP pulls a buster douglas and beats JBJ
reminder that this is non-mma related and that we have EL CLASSICO so you fucks can suck my dick until WSOF (pronunce wassup) kicks off
>>66545695
>>66545650
>>66545591
>>66545590
>>66545576
>>66545540
>>66545512
>>66545511
>>66545503
>>66545459
>>66545389
>>66545361
>>66545332
>>66545297
>>66545198
>>66545152
>>66545102
>>66545073
have a [you] boys. feeling philanthropic this evening.
How many hours a day you spend on /heem/?
>>66545773
Thanks, bruv
>>66545794
all of them
>>66545773
Thank (You)
>yfw we could live in a world where Ben Rothwell beats JDS and is legitimately given a title shot against the winner of Werdum v Stipe
WHERE IS THE FUCKING POLARIS STREAM HOLY SHIT
>>66545794
every waking moment, sometimes I spend time here in my dreams as well
>>66545794
All of them
>>66545871
Find one quick brochacho, the Cummings match is up next
>>66545873
Are those nightmares exclusively?
>>66545794
>thinking I ever sleep
I envy (You)r ignorance
>>66545852
im not surprised motherfucker
stop doubting big ben
Guys I'm bored so excuse me for doing this.
I believe fighters should fight at their natural in the ring weight and that should also be the stated weight, weigh ins done dehydrated brings a whole aspect of how well your body takes it and how good you can take it.
Fighters should be good at fighting, yes you can argue that fighters need more skills to become popular and shit that like that but at the end of the day the only thing that matters is how good you fight and we could possibly be getting robbed great athletes that would be great against people their own weight but they never get to fight in their own weight range because people lose like 1000 fucking pounds in waterweight for the weigh ins.
Also a guy who is good at the whole weight games can potentially fight guys that he has 20 fucking pounds on, and let's say just a random example with no specific person in mind be a champion of let's say maybe the 145lbs weight class while never in his entire life having fought at 145lbs.
>>66545927
when bulgaria/netherlands/puerto rico is posting, yes
>>66546005
weight classes are a joke
look at gsp
anyway, thanks for trying and englightening us with an almost-wall-of-text-by-you so here is your parenthesis you parenthesis
>>66546005
I agree.
Though to be fair FW and LW are cutcity, and Conor isn't exception..
He has no 20 pound on Aldo in normal life.
Ariel Helwani @arielhelwani 31s31 seconds ago
Ask and you shall receive: I'm told Ovince St. Preux is now a serious player in all of this. New serious candidate to fight Jones on 4/23.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6VQ_qsBkPkE&feature=youtu.be&t=3m41s
>>66546005
Weightclasses are a social construct.
Championship belts are a fairy tale.
Everybody would rather see JBJ vs DC fight eachother at heavyweight.
>>66545773
be careful or (You) might throw off the delicate (You)conomy
post yfw Jones comes out to this
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UyWM56BHeyE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UyWM56BHeyE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UyWM56BHeyE
(You)conomy
>(You)conomy
(You)conomy
>(You)conomy
>>66546238
Eh, whether it is OSP or Rashad it will be a disappointment unless JBJ finishes the fight in some spectacular fashion.
>>66546005
its only one of many advantages.
people can potentially fight others that they have 10 inches of reach on. or 5 inches of height on, if you want to employ this 'fight at your natural weight' thing, it's complicated by the fact reach and height offer just as much of an advantage and you can't combat that
why do some people like jon jones get away with breaking the law?
>>66546344
you reckon they will keep it a main event if it isn't Rumble or Gus?
has the ufc just accepted that jon jones is a fuck up now?
i need this opportunity..............
>>66546379
I doubt it. Gus is out and I'm pretty sure rumble is out at this point also.
Anybody have a link to Polaris?
>JBJ vs OSP
a modern day sacrificial lamb
>Top Tier Replacements
Jones at LHW
Cain at any weight
Overeem at HW
Anderson Silva LHW
>Acceptable replacements
Gustafesson
Shogun
Rashad
>Shit replacements
OSP
Corey Anderson
Chuck Liddell
I guarantee if OSP is in against Jones it will be the most streamed PPV of all time. Literally less than 100k buyers
The lack of cormier Dick sucking memes is disturbing.
Is /heem/ becoming good again?
This was a shit card except for the main event to begin with. Just cancel the ppv, move the card to fight pass, and put Jones on 200.
But they won't because they know there is no way Jones makes it to 200 without getting arrested a dozen more times.
>>66546832
the rehabilitation system works
>>66546832
see?
he's changed lads
>>66546832
Anger management already at work. Wow.
>>66546807
Kenny said we need to be more respectful while Daniel is recovering. He is a real human bean.
>>66546832
>followed by a smug pepe
You now remember moose beat OSP at 205 and moose is the biggest waste of talent story ever
thoughts?
>>66546933
That's a plush big wheel
>Roan Carneiro moving back down to Welterweight
whelp
Why is Luke always so angry?
>>66546933
pretty realistic fisher price car
>>66547031
>ask and ye shall recieve
literally no one is asking for this fight. don't waste a jon jones fight on this bullshit reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
>>66547047
he's an american hating nerd
>>66547047
he is perpetually angry at himself for being born a white male
>>66547077
not their fault that rumble doesn't want to fight.
>tfw OSP KOs JBJ
>>66547047
Is he butthurt because he is a Real Madrid "fan"?
>>66547047
>you are a loser professionally
>your parents hate you
>>66547031
Ovince St. Who?
>Juiceimir Paul Harris is grappling against a fellow leg lock specialist today
>no one here is talking about it
I asked for a link but nobody responded. :(
>>66547309
Joe has been slacking with his podcasts, I miss him already.
Did he say he was going to go on a hunting trip for one week this week or when is he going?
>>66547355
Sherdog, dog
>>66547283
OSP is a top ranked light heavyweight with true power, he is a serious contender and a huge threat to JBJ
>>66547355
dont think there is a link lad, you can buy the ppv for only £15 tho
>>66547444
nope he's a literal who that got beat Ryan fucking Bader of all people
>>66547700
Wait is glover scheduled?
Everyone should stay in shape
>>66547444
No he isn't. Shut up already, Lithcuck
Give him a couple years at a real fight team and you might have an argument
Jon Jones for the heavyweight belt please, fuck the queer who's challenging werdum this is the most important fight ever. If Jon wins he can cuck McGregor on that whole "first to hold 2 belts" cause JBJ is talented enough to do just that
>>66547810
Glover is fighting Rashad on the Khabib/Ferguson card
>>66544901
>SRB vs. TUR
>out cold
TTTTTTTTTTTSSSSSSSSSSSSUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
>>66547047
Holy shit what a mad, flustered faggot.
Does anyone have the comment he posted on leddit where he whined about being downvoted?
>>66547885
Fucking casual. Stipe is gonna murder Werdum so that fight should happen. Bones also isnt going to hw cus he'd get heemed by Mark Hunt and he's not even top 5 hw
>>66547444
That's what they said about Rampage
>all he needs is that one shot bro
>he'll crack his chin bro
Jon has a titanium chin quit playing
>>66542997
kekd
>>66547996
Stipe has fought literally whos and meme fighters the whole heavyweight division is a joke and the only appeal is "it can end any time cause all it takes is one punch"
Andrei Arwho and Mark Granpa are his most notable wins he has a loss to le no heart man if you think Stipe is gonna win you are a retard
>im willing to die in there to beat you jon
>stubs toe in training and quits
ah yes very impressive
I didn't want to believe it. I still don't want to and have some hope.
Cormier has actually pulled out hasn't it?
Norman Parke got cut today
I'm prepared to die to beat you Jon
Oh shit
The card is saved
>>66548349
Yesterday
>>66548250
Lmao ur fuckig duuuuumb. Just watch. Best believe ill be lurking in that thread to call you out when Stipe ko/tko that old man.
>>66548338
>>66548361
>saved
?
D-did anyone get sauce for that catfight webm with the pussy shots in the last thread
>>66548358
I'm prepared to die (or wait) to beat you Jon
Has fightpass 2.0 started yet or is it still a buffering mess
>>66548393
I'll be there to remind you how silly you were to doubt me
>>66548434
He's a madman.
I doubt jones wants anymore of the hammer.
>>66548349
praise jesus, fuck that point fighting goof
>>66548488
>>66548393
You're both idiots and literally nobody is going to care in a month and a half when the fight actually happens.
does anyone here even meme anymore?
>>66548495
Lmfao does he actually think he won that? Smh.
>>66548488
jokes on (You) I've already got 10 screenshots ready to post when Stipe sleeps Werdum
>>66548569
he did win though
HEEEEYYYYYY BAAAAAAABYYY
>>66547981
Need to see this.
>>66548495
that's exactly how the fight went down
>>66548585
Not a win to brag about desu
>>66548569
He did win
>>66540898
Being this dumb
>>66548361
I love the guy. True Champion. Deserves it ten times more than Jones.
>>66548495
Did you look at his recent stats?
He's in no shape to win vs jones, look at his future fight he's fighting for a place in the ufc currently and wants to have one last big payday before getting cut.
>>66548629
He won because Jones beat his ass to hard and the ref had to dq him.
>>66541185
>Crying about rosholt being cut
Le who cares
every polaris match has ended in a draw. Only 2 fights left.
>>66548674
You are remembering it wrong.
anyone got ground and heems similar to this?
its my fetish
>tfw I wasn't on /heem/ when it was announced that DC was out and I missed all the spicy memes
>>66542112
Only time I've won so far was that card
Though Nakamura was robbed tbf
>>66541655
Schaub said recently when he watched fights it wasn't fun cuz he endlessly broke them down like he would've fought them and alot of that he said is gone in terms of how he watches the fights now just from not using it
>>66548674
he won because jones was desperate enough to pull an illegal move
>>66541684
>lurker now means new
This guy
>>66548776
This. Hamill is a master of the mind games and has an indominatble spirit. He baited Jones and exposed his most obvious flaws. How many fights have you seen where Jones didn't resort to dirty tactics? Hamill exposed him hard and showed how he flounders when he is forced to fight within the rules.
>>66541971
I'm a McGregor fan but there is no way he wins the ww belt.
>>66541411
me faggot
>>66548763
from not using what?
>>66542068
That's a shit bet. Straight bets are fucking terrible
It's happening all over again
Shields is memeing on the guy
>>66542597
>jonjones says he will take a short notice fight.
rumble or a good heavyweight would be cool. Jon Jones vs mark hunt would be the killing of Jones on ppv
>>66548943
Gus has a foot out the door
I think he's done officially by the end of next year
>>66542911
Or CO main
Anyone have a stream of Polaris 3?
Main event is next. Want to see Tonon vs Paul Harris.
>>66549080
No, non title fights can only be five rounds if they are the main event. It's the atheltic commission, not he ufc, who decides.
>>66548707
I'm glad I didn't pay for it. If I wasn't at work (and then grappling after, work at my gym kek) I would have bought it. But all them lack of finishes man, fuck.
I still want a stream for Gary Tonon -_-.
>>66543079
Ayyyy thats my boy aoki
>>66549151
y did he duck nick diaz?
>>66549136
I bought it. No regrets. No finishes but a lot of high quality jits and everyone has at least been trying to get the sub because there are no judges. Shield fight just went to a draw but he was dominating and gave his opponent the Stockton slap lol
>>66548900
post your overall returns
>>66549112
CO main events have always been 5 rounds don't argue nonsense
>>66549193
Now shields just ripped into him on the mic during the post fight
>>66549193
Its a really good card, desu.
>>66549228
Ok, give me an example of that happening in a non title bout.
https://mobile.twitter.com/ZProphet_MMA/status/716368985856610305
Here's the slap from shields
>>66549342
>rewatch Nick vs BJ
>He didn't slap or talk to BJ all fight
>Hugged him afterwards
Oh man guys I just want BJ and Nick to be happy
>I watch BJJ
>>66549385
Me too bro. Better tune in, Paul Harris is walking in now.
>>66544901
TURKSHITS BTFO
Palhares is huge and this is an intense game of footsies
>>66549409
No stream :(
Pablo Harez is a big fag
Holy shit this size difference is absurd.
>Not taking a fight on short notice
I'd fight JBJ for 10k/10k and 3 pairs of Reebok shoes. Give me a call Dana
>>66548747
Jones pioneering ear pokes before our very eyes
>>66549525
>>66549534
screenshot please
>>66549561
>10k/10k
>/10k
high hopes Pierre
>>66549561
Don't you weigh like half of Jones' weight ?
>>66549596
Watching on tv, sorry
HEEM BREAKY
>>66549627
take a pic you goof
3 minutes left
Both guys are tired by to on has more gas left and has been making much closer sub attempts. Has palhares back now with 2 min left
>>66549584
HOLY SHIT he poked him so hard he made him go deaf, what an asshole.
heems
is the sexy one already in the UFC 200?
they ended in a draw but it was a great match. Would recommend watching if you get a chance.
>>66547444
t. Joe Rogan
P.S. He's a MUNNNNSTERRRRRR
Fresh mifojei
http://youtu.be/O4YyiDjDV1g
Here is the same thing he did for Nick a while ago
https://youtu.be/diPRj1_ZP60
And obligatory
Jon Jones the Lion: https://youtu.be/LLjVh1bO6mE
Werdum time: https://youtu.be/vVKTvh16aE4
>>66549715
>Not a single finish
It's okay guys, Tonon and Cummins are on EBI later this month. EBI delivers.
>>66549623
yeah it's even better, it would be a super fight but it would be allowed only in Japan
Who would rather share a cell with, Jones, War Machine or Alexander? Jones is likely to go insane from CoCo drawback, War Machine is constantly going to try and kill himself and Alexander is going to fart all night and talk only in Russian.
Our boy heem
http://youtu.be/gr6WdFTR3P4
anyone wanna watch wec 48 with me? i'll make webms
>>66549787
jones is the most sane one
MmaDigest update
>>66549791
its too much of a sport, what is this shit. sacrificial kicks, no head punching. The thais figured it out a long time ago
please anyone polaris stream??
>>66549896
Here's the link too
https://youtu.be/BAeg9BBRF84
>>66549920
It's over now
>>66549779
Ride the Tiger is trve kino
>>66549920
It's over
PAUL HARRIS IS BACK BABY
GET READY UFC
>>66549972
who won?!
is anyone watching shit right now?
>Hunt wants the Jones fight
SPICY
>>66549976
>trve kino
What?
>>66550039
holy fuck yes lmao
>>66550039
Spicy
p
i
c
y
>>66550029
Draw, Tonon was "winning" in my estimation though.
>>66549791
Kyokushin is legit as fuck tbqh
>>66550029
No one, all draws
heemspeak lads?
>>66550039
Would love that fight actually.
https://www.instagram.com/p/BDtpFOJxz2o/
>>66550045
>flickpleb detected
I bet you don't even know about Le Chevalier Noir
Amazing fights available as a replacement for Jones, but we all know that the sportkiller will make Jon pussy out.
>>66549784
>It's a Tonon wins again episode
>>66550123
Batman ?
>>66550155
Is that frank vs bas?
Hey pussy you still there?
if Hunt KO'd Jones in classic walk-off fashion, where would that place him on the P4P rankings?
>>66550185
8, but I'd move Jones to 10 and have no other LHW within the top 20
>>66550144
This desu
Jones already went public saying he will fight anyone, if it was anyone other than Jones I'd believe him
Schaub comes out of retirement and heems Jones into a living death
lads what are you all watching
>>66544483
SWEDEN YES
>>66550179
right here lad
you ready to get that dick sucked on the 9th?
>>66550178
Yes
IT'S HAPPENING
20 MINUTES
>>66550270
vampire weekend videos
>>66550270
fucken BJJ lmao
>>66550270
TUF 10, this black dude just had a testosterone reaction, sweating like a pig and everyone is damage controlling that he's just exausted
>>66550326
ANTHONY
"RUMBLE"
JOHNSON
>>66550270
My life crumbling into pieces lol ;_;
>>66550326
what's that in cet?
lads
my internet is shitting up on me, someone else make the next thread
>"It was UFC president Dana White who called me and asked how we felt about Anthony Johnson stepping in to fight Jones. Jon was sleeping at the time so I walked into his room and told him it could be Anthony Johnson instead. He opened one eye, said ‘They're all the same' and then went back to sleep. That's as far as any negotiation went."
wew
Who should Jon Jones fight?
>>66550326
MARK
"SUPER SAMOAN"
HUNT
>>66550270
8 bings til oklahoma and the bull buddy hield vs villanova
check out cbb for memes
>>66550382
1h20
>>66550391
TELL HIM TO COME IN AT 270 LET HIM STAY COMFORTABLE
>>66550396
MARK
"FAT CUNT"
HUNT
>>66550336
>>66550381
stream?
>>66550403
>oklahoma and the bull buddy hield vs villanova
what?
>cbb
what?
>>66550418
I don't know what that means
>>66550391
Wow how cool
s..stream?
>>66550418
Cheick, you absolute madman!
>>66550396
He ko'd a washed up Frank Mir and now /heem/ is on his nuts. He's a one dimensional bum.
>>66546864
good one laddy
ESPN STREAM
http://www.time4tv.com/2011/09/espn_04.php
>>66550460
>implying he hasn't been a fan favourite for literally years now
>>66550449
well it's 1h20, you know one hour and 20 minutes after midnight.
Don't you write hours like that in Germany ?
>>66550460
8/8
Is this attainable without steroids for a mid 20s woman?
>>66550448
march madness breh
http://zunox.hk/zxtv67.html
>>66550502
Link me some of your posts about him before the Mir KO
>>66550523
NEW
Streaming Sakara as we wait for Dana announcement.
http://leton.tv/broadcast/fuckingillegal
>>66550491
thanks la
>>66550517
bingbong :^(
>>66550517
Yeah it's not tho, 6:30pm eastern is 00h20 cet (or 12:30pm I guess)
Jones vs OSP UFC 197 co-main, MM vs Cejudo headlines
>>66550522
yes
>>66550557
it's in 10 bings m8
>>66550525
>bullhoop
no thanks desu
even though italians are supposed to support Gallinari
>>66550635
still got those tickets to Bellator la? u looked pretty cute in the pic
Guys its OSP, fight stays main event.
>>66550657
not sure if you're just memeing, but I was m8
that was an april fools
>>66550522
All the people here who say no havent exercised ever in their life. Yes it is.
>>66550696
i know la, you copied the irish lads idea didn't you?
>>66550491
thank you
>>66550719
ye
some people probably didn't get the ref though
OSP has an 80 inch reach (even longer than Gus), Jones is fucked when he doesn't have significant reach advantage.
>>66550713
Dude her clit is the size of my thumb
did all of the Polaris main card fights end in a draw?
>>66544376
Amazing fight. OSP can win this.
>>66550769
Even if SHE juices dosen't mean it's unattainable without.
>the city of Sakara's chin
>>66550523
>>66550523
>>66550523
new thread btw
>>66540500
That three piece combo on Robin.
>>66550039
that would be the spiciest matchup in recent memory
![fisher-price-car[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/cYZ72v7.jpg "fisher-price-car[1]")
![edin-arts-10081_1459324c[2].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/49IlDLr.jpg "edin-arts-10081 1459324c[2]")
