Anyone seen the new Ronaldo movie yet?
Literally the entire audience
>>63475355
Yes, it great. I had my doubts that someone as old as Christopher Walken could play ROnaldo convincingly, but he was fantastic.
>>63475372
>people like this exist
trolling aside how does this happen. lack of a father figure?
I don't think my town has an adult theatre, and I'm not gay so
How much time of the movie is dedicated to him getting repeatedly rekt by Germany?
>>63475420
my brother had a poster of pamela anderson in his room when growing up, i had a poster of maldini. no homo. i just appreciated him more.
>>63475355
I downloaded it, gonna watch it these days.
>>63475372
>full kit wanker
American?
>>63475446
but you didn't dress in a maldini kit and post photos of yourself on social media...or did you? anyway can anyone describe the most cringey moments in this movie pls?
>>63475481
Presumably, all the parts with Ronaldo in them
>one year after the Messi one
;^)
It's shit. It's just 90 minutes of Ronaldo sucking his own dick and showing everyone how rich he is. And it's funny how the players he plays with are neither shown nor mentioned (not even exaggerating, I think he mentions Di Maria once and not even in a good way), there's no Real Madrid or Portuguese NT, there's just Ronaldo and no one else is even acknowledged.
What is wrong with wearing the pants/shorts/socks of the team you support? Can someone explain this meme to me?
>making a documentary about someone who is still alive
>making a documentary about someone who is still doing what he is famous for
>making a documentary about someone where the subject gets considerable screen time talking about himself
C R I N G E
>>63475525
>>63475372
>us
>>63475481
>Ronaldo's son comes back from school
>Ronaldo takes him to the garage
>garage full with expensive cars of all types
>Ronaldo asks his car what car is missing
>Son guesses Range Rover? Porshe? Rolls Royce? Lamborghini?
>Ronaldo says "yes! it's Lamborghini. A tire broke"
>end of scene
>beginning of scene
>Ronaldo is on a plane with a friend
>friend tells Ronaldo that he has been working out and got a six pack
>friend shows six pack
>Ronaldo says "It's nice, you're almost like Cristiano King Ronaldo" (he literally calls himself that)
>end of scene
>>63475538
He has a museum and a statue in Madeira.
It's pretty ridiculous.
>>63475538
gotta cash in before his knee permanently explodes and he fades into literally who territory
wait, wat
>I can't believe this.webm
>>63475522
>movie is literally called "Ronaldo"
>there's just Ronaldo and no one else is even acknowledged.
>>63475570
>>63475563
top kek
i gotta watch this
hes literally niggertier
>Messi is autistic
>Ronaldo is a narcissistic asshole
>Le Cut Inside Man could be great without flopping, but chooses to do so anyway
>Muller is probably secretly a Nazi
>Neymar has the world's worst haircut
Is there not one single world-class soccer player who doesn't make you feel dirty to root for them
>>63475613
>"rooting" for individual players
>>63475606
It's pretty funny in a cringe sort of way. The only thing that's missing is Ronaldo pulling down his pants and measuring his dick at world record 14 inches. It wouldn't even stand out as the most narcissistic moment
>>63475445
Not much. He does spend a bizarre amount of time talking about getting rekt by Messi, though.
>>63475538
you forgot
>litearlly paying money to make a movie about YOURSELF while you are still playing
>>63475563
>calls himself Cristiaano King Ronaldo
TOPKEK this is ridiculous
>>63475613
sanchez?
inb4 arsenal fan..he seems like a genuinely nice guy
>>63475640
are there any women in it?
i'm starting to think he's not actually gay like we all thought but just full-on narcissistic and don't want to share anything, ever.
>>63475613
mata
>>63475372
Is wearing a full uniform acceptable on Halloween?
>>63475649
>sanchez?
Sanchez seems nice. So do Neuer, Silva, Aguero, Lewandowski, Bale and a lot of other world-class players.
>>63475654
>are there any women in it?
His mother, probably his ex-gf.
>>63475654
His mother and sisters are there, not much else in that regard.
>>63475563
>Ronaldo's son comes back from school
>Ronaldo takes him to the garage
>garage full with expensive cars of all types
>Ronaldo asks his car what car is missing
>Son guesses Range Rover? Porshe? Rolls Royce? Lamborghini?
>Ronaldo says "yes! it's Lamborghini. A tire broke"
>end of scene
Wow what a cinematic masterpiece
>>63475372
Wonder if it's the same guy
![the-science-of-sleep-had-some-big-hands-30726-1237324696-15[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/Gb3paku.jpg "the-science-of-sleep-had-some-big-hands-30726-1237324696-15[1].jpg")
>tfw Kermode review
The swedish Zlatan documentary is 10 times better. Mixes him and others around him. Especially his dad, who btw still lives in an apartment in Rosengård. He has every game Zlatan has ever played recorded. Don't know if it exists with English subs.
Ronaldo is exactly what I thought it would be, a massive circlejerking about him beeing the best.
>>63477236
there is this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ayd_0Hs_86A
>>63477255
That's not he one I'm thinking about. It's a two piece episode
>>63475355
Best soccer movie since that one with Stallone.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G7ctIxw9rjo
imagine movie Zidane A 21st Century Portrait
but with Cristiano
>>63475613
>Muller is probably secretly a Nazi
Confirmed for best player to root for.
>watch Roanldo's movie
>50% of the time they talk about Messi
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B_VPPSVIb6M
>>63477754
>le hue with standards
>le self hating shitskin
>>63475613
What's wrong with Neymar's haircut?
>>63477806
shoo filthy rat shoo
>>63475613
Why would you feel dirty rooting for autistic people
>>63477818
>"haircut"
>>63475613
>not rooting for the Rat King
>>63477818
Going for that GolfWang look
>>63475613
>Muller is probably secretly a Nazi
>>63479562
>wanted to murder the jews
kek?
>90mins of Cristiano moaning how he had a "terrible childhood" in Portugal and manage to win 3 Balon d'oro and be the "best football player in history", meanwhile hundreds of players from southamerica who are/were better than him literally starved to play football and never ever said something about it
>>63475355
Jerked off to it multiple times already
>>63477818
he wants to show off
>>63476091
Jesus christ this fag
>>63475475
because you autists don't do it
>>63479816
life's not fair. deal with it pinochet
>>63475680
Best fan ever.
