Why do women cut men off completely after breaking up with them? It's so heartless and hurts a lot.
>>23348272
>WHY WON'T SHE LOVE ME? I LOVE HER. I DESPERATELY NEED TO BE LOVED
Boo hoo
Simple. They don't want to be tempted to re-engage in the behaviors they used to share with their previous partner. They might still have feelings, and they're trying to move on. As a guy, I cut people off all the time....like removing a gangrenous limb.
>>23348277
I don't need her to love me, just acknowledge what we had and don't leave my life with traits, like it was just a dream.
>>23348292
You're lying to yourself, really you want her to still be hung up on you because you fell more in love with her than she ever was with you. You're angry because she's happy and you're not. You still crave her attention, if only so you can pretend you were the better half of your relationship.
Move on.
>>23348300
Yeah, so much easier to say, than to actually do.
>>23348388
Start by not posting on the Internet about her
>>23348272
Buddy, as a gay guy. Men are just the same as woman.
Going through a break up with my ex-boyfriend, of 5 Years.
And he's done the exact same thing.
It's tough, it's very, very tough.
But hang in there, time will heal these wounds.
Be strong.
>>23348397
Sometimes, an outlet is better than no outlet at all.
You may not be particularly fond of hearing about it.
But sometimes it's good to just let out how you feel, whether anyone sees it or not.
Having been on both sides of this, they don't want to be with you but they also don't want to see you or bee seen by you. Like she doesn't want to know when you meet somebody new and maybe if she's compassionate enough, she doesn't want you to get obsessed and hurt over her.
You can always start over months down the line when you're both over it and then be friends. It doesn't seem like a good thing to do immediately.
I was dumped almost a year ago though and I told her I just wanted to barely stay in touch and say "hi" every once in a while, and she said she didn't even want to hear from me whatsoever. That hurts. Like literally asking somebody just not to burn a bridge, and to be in your life in any capacity and they still don't want you in the picture.
But, you'll either die or you'll keep living.
>>23348272
Why would you want to keep in contact with someone once things have ended? It sends the wrong message to the person who was dumped that a chance for reconciliation may occur. If you both split on equal amicable terms I can see a friendship continuing but otherwise it's just detrimental.
>>23348272
Actually it's for your best. When my gf broke up with me she didn't cut me off and we ended up together again and are still in a complety twisted relation after 2 years. And now I wish we had cut off back then even tho that seemed way too harsh at the time
>>23348460
Not OP, but you know? You do raise a valid point. I think going through my break up, and having it be on No Contact really did save me and my Ex the trouble of not feeling as much pain.
My problem was that I was in a one-sided relationship, where I loved my Ex far greater than he ever felt for me.
He always just saw me as a great friend, where I was head over heels in love with him.
I think, if we tried to be friends right off the bat, it would have caused major problems with us, far greater than when we were romanticallyinvolved.
>>23348446
It's true... It's very true what you say.
It's very hard even thinking about moving on from a person you spend so much of your life with.
I still have so many interests that I will forever have, because of being with my Ex.
It's those past memories and the "What Ifs" that Haunt me still, fresh, like it was only yesterday.
I know it's not good to hold on, it's horrible unhealthy. Yet, it's like I'm ready to move on. But in spirit, I'm still defiant to live without my Ex.
Those weird dichotomies...
>>23348272
It isn't heartless, it's the right thing to do. I sort everything out calmly and maturely, I tell them that I'm going to block them on social media for 2 weeks to cool off but I'm happy to be friends after that. Not accepting the end of a relationship is the worst thing you could do to yourself and to her. One time a girl got really upset I was blocking her, I told her I thought it was the right thing to do so I had to do it, and I hoped she'd understand. She didn't, she got angry for a few days, but two weeks later we had moved on with our lives. Now when I bump into her, I can have a completely friendly conversation
>>23348489
That will ease more and more with time, I know so many people say that but it is the only real truth with breakups. I was with my last for a long time and he left such an impact on me, a lot of my hobbies/interests and general tastes were influenced by him and what he introduced me too, now that time has passed and I of course still miss him and occasionally have the 'what ifs' I am fond of these things I am passionate about and grateful I had someone special introduce them. You take little bits and pieces from people you spend time with and mold them into you, adding on to what you already have, it's a gift from everyone who's touched your life that you can carry forever.
>>23348472
Yeah I know what you mean.
That's even more true for relationships that are very similar to friendship. In a way I'd say my gf was also my bf like we had a lot of complicity. And in those cases it's even harder to completely end the relationship like you still want to keep the "friend" thing but you can't cause it's really hard to seperate it from the "gf" thing. I made the mistake of thinking I could, but yeah it's really hard.
>>23348272
My ex gf is my best friend. Her and my new gf have a begrudging acceptance of each other.
New gf is a much better lover thankfully
>>23348530
Thank you for saying that... That honestly means a lot to me...
It's been 3 months going on 4, since my Ex boyfriend broke up with me. It's still so hard to make it day by day.
But time really is the only cure for this kind of thing.
I want to really thank you for saying what you did.
It really helps put a lot in better perspective .
:)
>>23348563
I really couldn't stand the thought of my Ex becoming a friend to me again.
I was so deeply in love with him, that I found it impossible to separate the friend from the lover.
Since he wanted to end things, and I never did. I just couldn't bear the thought of not being romantically involved with him, especially since he has a girlfriend now.
So I purposely sabatoged any kind of friendship we could have in the future... Something I kind of regret, and yet at the same time don't...
I'm conflicted....
>>23348613
I'm glad to hear it. :)
I hope my next Lover is a lot better too.
>>23348272
why would you want to stay in contact with that person? like after a break up i dont really give a shit about the other person.
although i do really appreciate and believe in formal breakups. not what most people do and just stop contact. fuckin pussies
>>23348948
Great to hear that everyone is a carbon copy clone of you, huh?
Not everyone is the same, dickwad. Human Beings are a grab bag of mixed chemicals.
So everyone handles emotional situations differently.
Pretty sad if you have to be told to realize that.
It's great to hear that you can handle break ups with ease, and I mean that sincerely.
But for most people, it's a lot more complicated than just moving on, without a care in the world.
Get real.
>>23349085
crying over exs is a weak character trait. it shows an overly codependent attitude towards the other person and is pathetic in general.
its sad you need to be told that
>Gf and I have rocky relationship
>She gets pregnant
>Lot of uncertainty because she worries I'm only putting effort into the relationship because of the baby etc
>Things are looking up after he's born
>Literally the happiest I've been in a long time
>Arguments start again, she doesn't want to be with me anymore
There's a solid chunk of me that wants to die rn. The blessing is that she can't cut me out because of our son but still.
>>23349110
Uh huh. Good to hear that being an asshole, just to be an asshole is working out for you.
Be proud that you don't give to shits about a relationship with someone.
And that's not even said out of spite.
Mocking a statement made earlier, by reusing it, and not even in a witty way, by no means helps proves your point.
>>23349148
Does she at least accept your role as a father?
>>23349257
Oh yeah, we still need to work out what days I can have him and how much I'll need to pay per month and stuff, she's never been like that.
But I never ever wanted to be a part time dad.
>>23349203
there is no point to prove. its just an opinion and yes, i am an asshole.
