>>8054785
>I want to experience what it's like to struggle with math
Start studying Inter-Universal Teichmüller Theory.

I used to be really smart until I abused drugs (namely amphetamines)

So try that

>>8054807
No, life just requires more as you get older.
correlation doesn't equal causation.
confirmation bias to the max.
kill yourself.
-anon

>>8054785
Listen to pop music
Associate yourself with normie culture

>>8054785
>how always understands
I how always understand everything too, you're not alyne OP.

>>8054785
>Drop ~7-8 tabs of decent acid
>look in the mirror
>tell yourself you're a fractal
>have fun properly comprehending fractals afterwards

>>8054785
Try to watch many movies and read comics. Also browse memescon some shitty webs like imgur or 9gag. After i stopped reading any books and started watching slot of pictures and movies i found myself losing my abstract thinking at some point. If you dont train your mind for long time it loses its abilities.

>>8054785
lobotomy

>>8054785
What branches of mathematics have you actually studied? You sound like a high school kid who understood integrals a bit faster than everyone else. I may be wrong, but still, that is my impression.

Or do you simply want to feel miserable and get constantly get stuck on things that should be considered elementary? I'm pretty sure anons can recommend a few books that make you feel exactly like that.

>>8054785
Do a lot of drugs. A LOT.