>mom asks me to mow lawn
>after an hour I have to call her to ask her how to turn it on
>mow half the lawn and go over wood and break the lawnmower blade
>try to fix it by smashing it with a hammer
>the whole thing snaps off
>one half of the lawn is nice and the other looks overgrown andshitty
>spend the rest of the day crying
I feel like fucking homer simpson or something, how have I managed to fuck this one thing she asks of me up?
Glad my mommy never asks me to do anything, not after her last mistake.
Iktf anon
>Mother has friends for dinner last week
>She asks if I can lay the table
>Tells me all the plates and cups and silverware are in the kitchen but she has to go out so can I just do it
>she says it doesn't matter how it is as long as it is tidy and nice
>she leaves
>I want to help her because I do not help enough and feel bad
>go to the kitchen
>look
>there are like 4 different types of fork and knife, several plates and bowls and glasses
>start by putting the glasses around the chairs, 10 chairs at the total, 10 glasses so it makes sense
>then I realise I put the glasses where the plates need to go
>decide to put the forks and the knives into the glasses
>put the plates onto the seats
>take a step back
>realise it isn't right
>take all the glasses with the knives and forks off the table
>put the plates onto the table so when people sit the plate will be in front of them
>take 3 of each type of fork and put them down on top of the plates, do the same with the 3 types of knife
>put the glasses on their sides
>have only one type of fork left, so 10 forks, small strange forks, don't know what they are for
>take some tape, and tape them to the chairs
>still not sure what I was thinking
>mother comes home
>she thinks I did it as a joke
>tells me to get out and stay in my room all night
I'm sorry, I just can't do things
>With then close friend at a pier
>Wanted her picture with one of those novalty bill boards they often have there
>Gives me her phone but it locks itself before can operate it
>Tell her but she won't give me the code to unlock it
>Instead comes over to unlock it her self while berating me over it
>"Ugh the hell? It's not like it's difficult Anon. You're useless"
>Happens a few more times
>Wanted to throw the phone into the sea and walk off
Yeah I know I'm a faggot
>>30013728
I'm average at best in everything I do, but when it comes to female relationships, I'm literally rock zero.
For the past 23 years of my life, I have had ZERO female friends. ZERO.
I never knew what it felt to have a 'sister'
I never felt what it was like to talk about stuff with a girl that you would normally not do with a guy
I have never had a girl talk to me about Chad or whatever cute guys they are talking about
I have never orbit around a girl and hopelessly watch her ignore my love
I have never literally never carried out a conversation with a girl about non-work stuff for more than 10 minutes
I have never even have the chance to pair up with a girl in a school work.
JUST FUCK MY LIFE ALREADY
AT LEAST SOME OF YOU LOSERS HAVE HAD A FEMALE FRIEND IN YOUR LIFES.
>>30014251
>letting a bitch talk to you like that
Thats wher you goofd son
>>30013985
>sellotape them to the chairs
There's no way you can be that autistic. Couldn't your aspie memory remind you of how one resturant laid out a table?
>at self serve bbq station at grocery store
>load half the box with a flip up top with tendies, load the lid with macaroni
>everything goes flying when i close it
I sat there thinking how it was supposed to be used for too long, i still dont know the answer
>>30013728
>trying to fix a cracked blade by puttin a hammer to it.
u wot???
>>30013728
At least things tend to turn out alright for Homer Simpson.
>be 18
>summer
>mother agrees to look after two little kids for a week while the rest of their family is gone
>fast forward a couple of days
>she leaves somewhere with the older kid
>father brings the younger one to my room
>tells me to watch over her while he hangs up some clothes and uses the washing machine
>the girl doesn't like me so she runs away after a moment
>father berates me "it shouldn't be that hard to look after her"
>a little later
>father tells me to wash and peel some potatoes and put them in a pot
>start doing it
>he comes back
>tells me I'm doing it wrong
>takes the knife and a potato and starts doing it himself
>at the same time, he explains how to do it and advertises his method how easy, efficient, etc. it is
>don't care at this point and walk away
If only I had received my ID card, I would have left the house and got wasted.
>>30014801
Are you fucking kidding?
Look, those styrofoam carry-out boxes are only supposed to be loaded in the bottom half. If you close it and stick the tabs, the tabs point down. Bottom is bottom.
You can make it heap over, fine. But food doesn't go in both halves. And if you're so obese that you'd need 2 of those full with food... well, get 2.
