>Sign says "Don't step on grass"
>Step on the grass
Who /mischief/ here
Today
>Hold a door for someone
>She tells me "Thank you"
>I thank her, instead
Yesterday
>Aunt texts me and says goodnight and sleep well
>Tell her goodnight and you too
>i didn't sleep well
Day before
>Street light is red, and I stand there on my phone texting
>Street light turns green, decide I'm ready to cross
>Casually walk across striped, zebra path, pretending white lines are lava
It's an old story from back when I was a cyborg but here it is.
> Be 16
> Be staying at friends house
> 3 am and still awake
> Can hear people talking very loudly outside
> Reee.gif
> Look through friends stuff to see if I can use anything to shut them up
> Find a smoke grenade used for paintball
> Remember he paintballs a lot
> Throw it at them
> They're encased in smoke
> They can't pinpoint who did it since he lived in a block of flats
> SmugPepe.exe
>lift weights nearly every day
>take steroids
>buff as fuck, fill out XL shirts
>people probably think I'm a gymrat asshole that fucks a few girls each week
>in fact I'm a friendless virgin who lifts weights alone in the basement watching anime and rarely leaving the house
>someone asks how i am
>say good
>am bad
>be virgin robot
>see thread about girls
>make up fake green text about fucking a girl
>leave the thread
>come back
>20 (You)s, all "GET OUT NORMIE REEEEEEEE"
You guys are so predictable
>>29957875
the aboslute
mad
a
n
>>29957679
>Get drunk with the chad squad
>Go to golf course
>Steal the entire green
You know who I am
>bored late at night
>make reddit account
>make really shitty 4chan-quality comments on political posts
>spend the night shit posting and arguing with angry redditors
>que as a tank
>im actually dps
>>29957898
i yell at normies to get out because i'm pretty sure 90% of them around here are robots who are even more lonely than i am (if that's possible) and would appreciate the (You)s and feelings of perpetrating a successful ruse
>A stranger ask me for directions
>Tell them I don't know how to get to his destination
>I actually do
>Someone talks with me
>Say "Sorry, what did you say?"
>I know very well what they said before
>Bump into someone
>Say "I'm sorry"
>But in fact I'm not sorry at all
>Cashier tells me to have a good day
>don't have a good day
>staff parking only (elementary school)
>park there anyway and leave to go to work across the street
>>29958167
that's very sweet of you anon
brings tears to my eyes
>>29958564
It doesn't specify what type of staff it's reserved for. For all you know it could be reserved for the staff at your job.
>>29958595
Valid point. You are very astute.
>Buy parking spot at uni
>Dont even own a car
That'll show them
>Tell mummy I fucking hate her and she should just die
>Actually love her very much but just keep an asshole outer shell
>ask my dog who's a good boy
>never tell him it's him
>act like i'm happy around my dad so he thinks i'm feeling better because i know he's worried about me
>actually still suffering from crippling depression
>>29955515
>be closet normie who lurks this board
>put my phone apps into folders
>place 4chan app in "social media" folder
