knife through the chest seems easy and quick
>>29934356
haha what's the headline going to be on r/4chan. Maybe "Robot finds a way to kill himself". Lol that would really get upvotes.
>>29934468
I hope you're not implying I post anything on there. And if redditfags want to laugh at me then fine, it's anonymous.
Knife piercing through the heart most likely won't kill you. You have about a 40% of success with that method. Bleed out may take a painful couple painful hours.
>>29934586
wtf how? it's a knife through the heart. how can that not make you bleed out in several minutes?
>>29934356
H E L I U M
E
L
I
U
Mwithout oxygen of course
Shoot yourself in head whilst balls deep in hooker.
>>29934853
I have no money or guns.
>>29935027
Jump from a high structure like a cliff. It's not that hard really.
>>29934468
but you need to have a lot of answers so ppl on reddit think your post is very popular !!!!11
>>29935058
That would be too terrifying, I hate heights and couldn't jump. No, I think stabbing through my heart is the best way to do it. I keep thinking about doing it in my mind over and over.
>>29935130
It's not hard mate, if you're in a country with guns shoot yourself is by far easiest.
If you're in a country without guns jump of a tall building and if you can't do it do the helium tank thing. The knife idea is terrible and probably won't work.
>>29935058
That's the logical sensible idea that batches don't want to think about.
Wanna kill yourself. Find a 7+ storey building and do a fucking flip off the top, you might regret it on the way down but by then it's too late, just enjoy the rush and aim for an old lady. Hit terminal v then a nice painless splat
Nah these fuckers just want attention or to over complicate shit so much that they never go through with it.
Jess h Christmas man even O.D'ing on hard liquor or glue is a pretty easy way to off yourself. Fucking electrocution, good old toaster in the tub, or fork in the outlet there are so many easy ways to kill yourself but people want it to be so special that they romanticise it until they can't be bothered with the effort
Tldr jump off a high-rise, do a flip. Faggit
>>29935130
>it's an anon feels suicidal but takes comfort discussing possible plans episode
>>29935200
In England so no guns. My parents would be a bit suspicious if I ordered a helium tank off the internet. I also have no money. How would being stabbed in the heart not lead to death? And it's something that can be done spontaneously so no regrets.
>>29935130
>ribcage
>mfw mummy figured out i gave up on life and want to die
>>29935302
Does it cover the whole thing? Gotta be a gap.
>>29934356
Its not. Dont try that, its a slow painful death, provided you can even do it, try something quicker if youre committed.
>>29935268
Go "catching polemic on pokemon go" go up tall building and jump the fuck off faggot. Or go climb a crane at night and do the same thing. Being afraid of heights means being afraid to die, you wanna kill yourself you better flap those wings motherfucker cause it's time to fly.
I've sat up on top of a building site of a skyscraper moping like a bitch and I pussied out. Now I won't do it because I've decided to try and drag out this painful existence as long as possible because it's what I deserve for being such a little pussy
Drink bleach and die cunt.
>>29935268
Get a train ticket to Beachy Head. It's not that hard. Use a journey planner to go there. You can jump off the part with solid hard ground at the bottom. Head first for best results.
Drop hanging is the way to go for a fast and 'painless' suicide
>>29935395
He could try the gentings casino in Sheffield, or suicide by train if he's near tracks
>>29935379
It would hurt like fuck and the fall would be terrible. Why do people sucide like this?
>>29935268
Ayyyy, I'm in England too, anyway I'm not a doctor or anything but you've got to stab yourself about 10 times in the stomach/chest to die, so if you miss your heart it will be very painful and you will survive with horrible scars. If you did hit your heart it would also be a horrible way too die.
You shouldn't kill yourself anyway mate if you're living with your parents, they might be able to help you.
>>29935425
Yeah but how easy is it to get access to a tall building? Train tracks are not reliable unless you have your head firmly resting on the track.
>>29935433
If you're over 7storeys you hit terminal velocity you don't feel your skull going through itself terrifying fall? Well shit it's a good thing you won't survive
People do it as it works. Consistently. None of this escape kit bullshit, just handy dandy exit route vertical.
>>29935475
>parents can help me
I doubt it. I don't have a bad relationship with them or anything but they don't understand me at all. And they never really raised me, just provided for me.
>>29934356
Point to the liver and you will be dead in a minute, do not try to stab your heart or you will break a rib and survive
>>29935508
Pretty easy, just walk in with a high vis, hard hat and a clipboard and you can go anywhere in England without being bothered.
Or just look like you are meant to be there, and there are many easy access buildings. Like universities and office buildings.
Or when in doubt a crane. Just climb up a crane at night and you have a tall building sized height and no doors
>>29935538
Yeah, it might be an absolutely shit situation but I bet they could help you get a shitty job like tescos, and then you could do that to help take your mind off things.
easiest way to kill yourself is to smoke for most your life, it's slow but you'll get there eventually.
>>29935379
Bleach. There's an idea, I'd say a litre would kill a maybe 2
Try that op you can buy bleach in shops and everything
>>29935603
That would not help at all. I've been self destructive for a while now so I guess this was inevitable.
>>29935596
I have thought about "blending in" but a lot of places need key cards to gain entry. There's a tall crane in my town but I think they have security 24/7.
>>29935641
Could you expand a bit please.
>>29935268
>How would being stabbed in the heart not lead to death
Because you can't stab yourself in the heart, your survival instincts will literally prevent you from hitting yourself strong enough to lethally injure yourself
You're going to get close to your heart at most and then suffer for hours as you can't breathe with a knife stuck in your lung
Just don't kill yourself bruh, trust me on this one
>>29935658
Weekends are the days builders and security couldn't give a rats ass,
If you have hi-vis and a hardhat your set, if not wait till Saturday/Sunday night and climb the fucker it's windy at the top so make sure you don't fall off... Nevermind, just make sure to blame something stupid in your note, like putin, Nutella, pokemon or immigrants for the lulz
>>29934356
Have you ever even killed something with a knife? I assume you're joking when you say easy and quick
dont use helium, theyre diluting it with oxygen
go to a weld supply shop and get pure nitrogen. sourced everything, could literally do it tomorrow but im too much of a pussy
>>29935662
Well I will try.
Pretty much given up on my future about a year ago. Don't know or care about what career I want. Too socially anxious to even try to get a gf or better myself in anyway eg gym. Totally fucked my last year in school and probably failed all exams. Been drinking heavily and getting black out drunk, ending up miles away from my house with no recollection of events. Been eating too much and starting to get fat. Now the money has run dry and I have nothing to distract myself with. I probably sound like a faggot since I'm only 19 and people will say I don't have real problems but whatever. Also got OCD, probably not the most severe but it doesn't help.
>>29935740
Injust don't want tonfail an get arrested for trespassing.
Use fentanyl or a solid barb you dumb fucks.
>>29935792
Pussy,
you can probably climb faster than them and if they see you when your more than halfway up they have no chance before you take your graceful Swan dive
>>29935631
Do not drink bleach this is a worse idea than the fucking knife.
I'M SERIOUS DON'T DO IT.
Unless you like spewing blood until you suffocate.
Bleach doesn't kill you like stop your heart or some easy shit, it's literally a base chemical, it dissolves your throat. Really the same as drinking acid.
>>29934586
>Knife piercing through the heart most likely won't kill you.
Pretty sure piercing the heart with anything the size of a knife will kill you.
>>29935770
>mfw they change the name in Australia to "Escape Bag"
>>29935852
I didn't say painless. Like we deserve a painless death anyway
>>29935785
Here's what you want to do
First of all, stop drinking, I was like you when I was 17 and studied abroad, I got lazy and started doing stupid shit
You're 19 and pretty fucking young, you've got plenty of time to right your wrongs
Next, you want to focus on school, just fucking do it, focus on educating the fuck out of yourself, because you have to realize that the better your education, the more opportunities you will have in the future
As for a career choice, just invest some time in finding out what you like to do a lot and establish a career in that, even if it doesn't earn you a million bucks every year, a job you like to do is better than doing a job that you absolutely hate
Don't fret about getting a gf just yet, most sane women are 30+ anyway, so just wait until they're ripe and then go picking
At your age you have all the time to fuck around and invest in personal interests and hobbies, so just do it, try to do anything and find what you like to do
Killing yourself at 19 is literally waste of a life, you've got 50-60 more years to live if you take the average lifespan into account
Just take life with chill, rather than worrying all the time
>>29935923
Thanks for the advice but half of that is "just be yourself".
Maybe I shouldn't have posted anything. It's pretty obvious what I need to do make things better, and I honestly have tried in the past, but I always end up failing or giving up. And now I'm so cynical I just don't want to try anymore. Only got myself to blame I suppose.
>>29935785
I'll try my best to give you some advice friendo.
The first thing I would recommend is getting something to do e.g. a job, apprenticeship or maybe going to college, because the shittiest thing you can do is sitting at home doing nothing since you will just regret your life more and more, whereas if you have something to do it helps you keep your mind of things.
I know you said your parents wouldn't help you, but I'm sure they would be able to do something.
I would also try to stop caring what the normies think of you (if you haven't already) and just focus on whatever it is you are trying to do. This is the best thing I've ever done since you have so much less to worry about.
The most important thing to do is just make sure you do SOMETHING, I had really shitty times when I was younger and focusing on something DOES help to cut it out.
>planning your suicide
only attentionwhores do this shit
>>29936054
I've been saying this the whole thread, fucker should livestream it and that's it, none of this MySpace-esque edgy "I wanna kill myself but am too afraid " bullcrap
>>29936105
>livestream it
do you understand the whole attention whore bit
>>29936039
I'm supposed to be going to Uni in October. I'm scared to go though, I can't see myself making any friends or really succeeding academically. I will have to find out I guess, but I think it will be make or break. And I already tried an apprenticeship, hated it.
>>29936105
Maybe my thread is shit but at least it fits with the board unlike 60% of the shit that is posted nowadays.
>>29936127
You don't remember /b/ and their livestream suicides? Damn immaculate go see if I have any saved on my hdd to make webm for these threads
>>29936025
Everyone fails in their life, you just have to pull up your pants and dust yourself off
Don't listen to people who try to put you down, rather find people who are more supportive
Life is all about yourself, because noone else lives your life but you, so stop worrying about what other people think or want you to do and do your own thing
Of course this means I can't inherently stop you from fucking up your life even further, since you have the freedom of choice, but I'd prefer if you didn't do it, because you can turn the tides around like fucking moses
>>29936132
Nice, if it means anything to you I think 99% of people can succeed academically, the reason they don't is because they've had a shit chance at it. Just focus on school and you will do ok, don't feel you have to get involved with the normies just because "Uni is where you make experiences for life XDDD".
>>29935735>bruh
Normie inbound
Do a whole bunch of amphetamines
>>29936163
No man, your just harking back to the last big thing of the board, sure now it's traps and degeneracy, but 2 years ago it was tfwnogf and how do I commit sudoku without a gun threads left right and up my asshole, there were other threads about other chap shitting up the board prior, but R9k of old isn't r9k1 I guess
Enjoy your plea for attention you baiting nigger
>>29936229
It's true, I'm not a 100% robot, but I am a misfitPlease don't reeeee on me, I just want to help
>>29936211
But I want to be a normie. Isolation is fucking shit, I won't romanticise it like half of r9k does. I'm no genius, I'm not great at anything. It's unlikely I will be able to make a satisfying life based on my talents alone. And three years of being surrounded by people who have an easy time making friends and gfs? I don't think I'd make it honestly.
>>29936246
I wasn't looking for attention I just wanted to know sucide methods m8, not my fault people started asking questions. And now my proposed one has been BTFO so it's been useful to me.
>>29936274
Sorry that came out wrong, what I meant is don't do anything you feel really uncomfortable with straight away e.g. If you haven't talked to anyone your own age in a year don't go to a club straight away. Talk to people in lectures/cafeteria and then gradually ease into the normie lifestyle.
I can talk to normies very easily (I'm pretty much a normie myself desu) but avoid them unless its necessary and I don't get bored, but that might be different for others.
>>29934586
You're an idiot and you need to think hard about what happens when your heart gets a giant hole in it
>>29934661
for real, people who talking about hanging or wrist slitting clearly have not done their research
