How do you deal with being dumb and useless? I feel like escaping. I'm good for some things but not too good. I'm tired. I don't feel like killing myself but sometimes I don't want to work anymore. I don't want to do anything. What's the point?
>>29918420
The point is to decide. Then to act. I spent 4 years destroying myself, squandering my gifts, not sticking to anything that would have yielded benefits, because I decided I was less than other people. For no good fucking reason other than the fact that some people are born in better circumstances than I. I'm not even handicapped in any way. I was merely too blindsided by my own envy to do anything for myself. I was depressed and I hated myself. The old negative habits are strong, and take time to shake off.
But see, in that time I spent hating myself, I mastered introspection. I formulated a code of conduct, a physical training routine, a diet, "goals," habits I knew I had to break, habits that I wanted to attain, and above all, an Aesthetic for myself.
OP, life is not easy. The past can haunt you and the future can intimidate you. But if you are able, healthy, of sound mind, and are not being hindered by extreme poverty or danger, you can create an Aesthetic for yourself. You can create yourself. You can choose to view yourself as an instrument of manifestation. >CONT
>>29918551
I want to know more.
>>29918420
>>29918551
Before anything, I would reccommend getting physically healthy and improving your diet for optimal bodily and mental performance. This I feel is crucial to any personal recreation, beause the process isn't easy. You need energy reserves to keep yourself from burning out, giving up, and going back to fucking your own shit up because you hate yourself. This and rest.
The first fucking thing I knew I had to do was quit cigarettes. It made my life hell.
>Aesthetic
What I mean by that is a code of conduct. Choose a code you can live by. A set or a single tenet that you have conviction in and that aligns with your perspective on life. Something you can wield like a weapon in dark times. It's a lifestyle. You can't NOT live by your code, because your code is a principle. It's a part of you that you imposed upon yourself to govern your own actions. It's a standard you live by, and it transforms your personality over time. The better you live by it, the more powerful the effect.
This worked for me... because I didn't have any self-control. I didn't believe in anything and didn't work towards anything. But I had energy, and doing this helped me focus my energy into a blade, instead of pissing it away with drugs and porn.
>>29918701
>>29918735
The whole point of this is taking yourself seriously, OP. It's deciding to take yourself seriously and then taking action.
I wrote this all out, attached pictures to it that inspired me. And believe me, it took me a long time to decide what I wanted my shit to be about while I was alive, right here on this planet. 4 years of nothing. But I brought something back out of it.
You should look at yourself with a critical eye. You know your regrets and mistakes.
You should look at your life with an objective eye. You know what you can and cannot control. You know where you live, your resources, your options, and opportunities.
People should be honest with themselves and with what they want to become, and bridge the gap between the two. I find that it's always never as far in between as people think it to be. Just live man. Take yourself seriously and decide to do it for yourself. Nobody is going to live your life for you.
People may love you and want you to do so, but only you can live it. I spent years fucking myself up while people I cared about lost their faith in me, grew tired and eventually moved on. That's all.
>>29918420
>How do you deal with being dumb and useless?
go join the armknee
>>29918420
I just reassure myself that everyone else is as dumb and as useless. That 95% of jobs are monotonous and requires very little skill, yet all these normie wagecucks like to think they're better than you cause they have the advantage of more on the job experience.
Right now I'm making $11.50 an hour for sitting on my ass all day. I make 4-6 calls a day, drag it on by putting the customer on hold 2-3 times, then pretend I'm doing paperwork for an extra hour to get overtime cash.
The fucking faggot training me made it sound so complicated when literally all I had to do was CTRL+F then search the customer's problem on the manuals.
>>29918420
there is no point and there never will be.
(this is original i'm sure)
