Who is she and why isn't she reciprocating?
She's a "friend" and she is married.
He lives in another country, probably got bored of talking to me, and I most likely tried too hard to impress him and ended up seeming desperate.
Because women are incapable of love.
oreganocommento
Her name's Maude.
She's dead
>>29875131
Fuck you, Harold.
Her name's Nadine.
>Only girl I've been interested in at university, think I actually loved her at one point
>Turned me down last year in October
>Turned me down again on a group holiday a couple of weeks ago on a night out in a foreign country
>Feel like utter shit the entire night
>On the verge of crying for the first time in years as I realise she'll never feel the same way about me as I do about her
>Next day I realise there's just no point in caring or trying with her anymore
>End up getting with a seriously QT Asian girl in another group that happened to be out there same time as us
>Azn girl lives near Nadine, group wants to organise something and she says she'll host
>Last time I see her she's holding my arm while we walk, kisses me and tells me she'd really like to see me again
>First night I get home from university end up taking a qt blonde girl home, do the same again with her next week
>Unrequited girl messages me asking how my holidays are going, mention the blonde girl
>Old fwb messages me and wants me to spend a whole weekend with her (This coming weekend) sucking and fucking
>Mention it to Nadine, she says to make sure to bring condoms
>Tell her we never used any and she doesn't like them anyway
>Her replies become short and curt
>Ask her to let me know when she's hosting a night out so I can see the asian girl
>She stops replying
Spent three years losing weight and improving myself, part of that was so I could be better for her, but if she doesn't want me then fuck it I may as well enjoy myself.
>>29874752
>tripfag with normalfag problems
Kill yourself OPfiltered and saged
>>29874752
>friend of a friend
>probably doesn't give a shit since she lives on the other side of Indy
>friend I knew in high school
>is apparently pregnant
>>29875465
For reference, before all of this I was a morbidly obese turbo autist. All of you here can make it.
>>29874752
Her actual name is not Alice but it's going to be used in this post for the sake of both of our personal securities.
>She's 5'9, thin, has carelessly conditioned long, dark brunette hair and thoughtful, cerulean eyes. She dresses conservatively (relative towards the sartorial norm of our age at the time and at present), lots of sundresses, little makeup and sometimes 'sportswear' that would reflect a cold temperature and a quick scavenging of the closets for whatever is primordially apt.
>Her family emigrated from Nebraska when she was 7, her former midwestern accent balances out beautifully with the urban Australian accent. She consciously tries to correct her speech and its' inflections at simultaneity when she's speaking, but when discussing subjects of her passion, all conscientiousness is out of the picture and she sounds like a happy child, metaphorically you may envision a baby stag attempting to run when it can scarcely walk
>Her roofless, cerulean eyes behave in an infantile sense; anyone who finds babies to be 'cute' and observes the often would understand - infants are capable of seeming deep and remarkable concentration - wherein their eyes are fixed on a single object for a long time, or seem to be immobile and sunken into their thought, although they may become easily disturbed at some point by otherwise spontaneous and trivial events, which would send their eyes elsewhere or into a flurry. Alice's eyes are like that, but with a more mature quirk; when she is lapsing out of a thoughtful trance, her eyes and dilated pupils form a vista so potent that you can't help to try to emulate such an ocular structure while looking in the mirror at later times
>she walks with a naive disregard for postural etiquette, and yet appears to be so graceful and innocent. Basically what innumerable whores want to seem like, not realising the veil of pretentiousness they put on to their pseudo peacockesque strides just reeks of shit
>>29875131
Flanders please go
>>29875762
or he means Ruth Gordon?
>>29875732
Put the thesaurus down you autist. Go to /lit/ if you want to write a novel.
She's married to another man and having his child
>>29875732
Please stop writing.
>>29875732
>Myself, 17, Alice, 17, confer at our high school's awkwardly organised 'literary club'
>Lukewarm English breakfast tea served in styrofoam cups, 4:15 pm in the afternoon
>Biscuits still in their packages, the wrapping not even disposed, both items laying on the uncomfortable old fashioned simplistic school table
>An old woman, presumably a former English teacher who at that time was patently beyond retirement age, with her bobbing chin and prodding head, asks the 7 conferees to introduce themselves
>At this time, there was some controversy surrounding me at school and a supposed argument between me and some popular slut on Facebook (that never happened, I was, however, notorious for being a cringeworthy Facebook arguer at the time, particularly in being contrarian atheists by arguing against positivism) and other rumours permeated
>"I'm Alice (surname), favourite authors are Nabokov and Chekhov" says Alice, teacher commends her, at the time I had no idea who they were
>"I'm anon, and I'll tell you that not everything you've heard about me is true", a few awkward chuckles but Alice seems to genuinely find it funny
>Since we go to an international school and Alice and I take different syllabi, we never see each other outside of the literary club and sometimes at afternoons in the library
>See her in a library 2 meetings afterward, hitherto hadn't had much contact with her, I sit just afar enough from her to be able to admire her beauty and not too close to be uncomfortable
>She literally packs her shit up and comes over and sits next to me
>"Anon, how's life"
>"Yes"
>For the next couple of weeks, both of us frequent the library more and more often, and we evolve from discussing incidentals and trivial curricular stuff to the meaning of life, she introduces me to big boy philosophical concepts
>She's been reading Harvard classics and its denomination, while I had since then just been reading genre fiction
>>29874752
I haven't had one of those in years.
The memory of the last girl I liked who didn't like me back is slowly fading.
![lead_960[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/MxcTfD2.jpg "lead_960[1].jpg")
>>29874752
I haven't talked to her for thirteen years.
She was kind, off from a good, conservative family. Warmest smile i've ever seen in my life.
She already has a major, a good job and must be engaged by now. And i'm a wagecuck that wants to start college at 25.
All those things she's lived. All her friends, her trips, her lovers and sadness... I would love to meet her and hear those things from her. But maybe it's time to let that go, especially when the feeling doesn't diminish with the years.
>>29876068
Give up and move on m8, I'm >>29875465 and it was eating me up inside the whole time I didn't want to let go of what I thought we could have.
Focus on yourself before you focus on grills and you'll be better for it.
>>29876084
That's true.
The thing is i've never felt like this for another girl as i have for her. She was too good at such a young age and it made me set the bar too high. So good that it made me feel i wasn't worthy of her; that nothing i could do would be enough for her, even though she would have been okay with it. And so i walked away. And i'm glad she's doing great.
I've never worried about love or about finding somebody to be with; I've been a loner all this years. But if i had to settle down with a woman, the only good one would be her.
Good for you for improving yourself, by the way.
>>29876207
Yeah it's the same for me, she's been the only girl I've genuinely cared about for as long as I can remember. Sounds like we've done the same thing, you just need to focus on you now.
You don't need to worry about that stuff, it'll happen when it happens, it's not something you can really plan or expect.
She is my. sister and not a degen like I
>>29875732
>>29875902
You are literally the fedora meme incarnated
>>29876609
spot on
fdhzsdjfjskfd orognogli
She isn't real
I'm an unlovable piece of shit anyway and even though she'd probably pity me or something I could never be deserving of love.
There is no girl.
She can't because there is no girl.
>>29874752
First letter of her name is J. Any other facts from this point might be a little fake because >posting whole truths online.
Anyway
>Met her third year of highschool, she was a grade under me.
>I'm a lanklet weeb with few friends
>She's a weeb to so we get along alright
>Eat lunch with her some times
>My (very few) '''friends''' give me shit for it and call me a creep
>Some of her friends say we're cute together, say we'd make a 'cute couple', thought we were dating ect.
>To spinelessly beta to make a move
>I had been lurking online anime forums for a long time at this point so I was always trying to be concious of my 'power level', anyone even mentioning anime in public would get me nervous and sweaty
>J on the other hand didn't care what normies though
>She would loudly talk about the things she liked with such excitement
>even though it made me panic hard it was also what I admired about her
>She had literally everything I wanted from a gf, petite, glasses, artistic and was genuinely enthusiastic about a hobby
>fast forward to last year of school
>been trying to get closer with her
>one of her friends is trying to find out who J apparently had a crush on
>says she doesn't want to tell her right now
>turns to me after a second of though
>"Oh but don't worry anon, it's not you"
>Die inside
But wait there's more, Cont.
>>29874752
In love with triggering images
>Tfw blocked them all.
>Tfw block one block all
>>29878086 (You)
>ever since school ended have had very infrequent contact with her through >normiebook
>she's literally the only friend on the account so don't bitch to me about it
>she almost never messages me first though, only times she does is to ask for help with something
>conversations also often turn to things she had been doing with her friends
>after a few weeks of getting some decently sized conversations going with her, decide to ask her out in a sudden moment of stupidity
>she takes a while to reply
>tells me she'd love to 'catch up' some time and maybe see a movie
>I live 4 hours away and never got my license
>the happiness from finally having asked her for a date quickly fades as I realise I'll never get an actual date from her
>most conversations from that point on have seemed shorter and shorter
>she hasn't messaged me first even ONCE since then
>It's been 2 weeks since I last messaged her about a program I found for playing card games online after she had said she was interested
>I LITERALLY OFFER HER AN ACTIVITY WE COULD SHARE TOGETHER
>AND SHE DOESN'T REPLY FOR TWO WEEKS
At this point I'm fucking glad this 'love' is slowly dying and turning into depression and anger because now I won't be chasing after unrealistic expectations. I know she talks with her other friends probably fucking daily too. Sucks being born a non-chad.
>>29874752
Lady luck, she hates my guts
![2288b035ebc6192cc4815dde514facb6[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/5g7DbXI.jpg "2288b035ebc6192cc4815dde514facb6[1].jpg")
>>29878222
>trips
or maybe not, thanks bae
