who /losing their god damn mind/ here?
it's happening
original 1.2.1.1.1.1
I used to say that, until I actually had a total psychotic break and it was the worst experience of my life, now I'm more careful with my words
>>29737176
Can you describe what happened? Even if you have to spare details
>>29737233
During a period I was doing a lot of drugs, staying up for days at a time, and reading lots of weird religious and conspiracy type stuff. I started having delusional beliefs about myself at first, which isn't that strange to me, but then I began to hallucinate, first hearing things that weren't there, and then seeing things like a UFO in the sky. I became obsessed with certain strings of numbers and for example seeing the number 23 would give me a panic attack. I recovered from it, but even once the hallucinations stopped I basically felt like I was in a constant state of panic for 3 days straight, I was afraid of everything and scared to even trust my own thoughts or senses. I would hear a beeping sound and think I was going to start seeing aliens or something, it was really bad.
>>29737286
Would you say there was a drug that especially contributed to this ? this sounds awfully familiar.
>>29737410
not >>29737286
but fuck nbomes
>>29737150
Me OP, ive had a very noticeable decent into madness, I waste all my money on booze, smokes and hookers, alienated almost all my family and only my real close friends talk to me.
Someone tell me ill be ok?
>>29737286
>substance-induced transient paranoid delusion
>psychotic break
laughing_psychiatrists.gif
>>29737410
I think 3-meo-PCP was the biggest factor
>logged into facebook (fake account)
>saw pictures of how much fun everyone had on the 4th of july today
>get really upset and angry
>too sore to lift weights
>decide to go run (it was 11 PM)
>start running outside in no particular direction
>run 32 minutes non-stop and then tripped and fell straight on my fucking face
>laid there and cried for 10 minutes
>try stand up
>realized I fucked up my ankle
>limp all the way back home fighting off misquitos.
>>29737472
Fuck me my dude. I knew it.
Original PCP it was for me.
>>29737150
took the hardest pill and enlightened myself. Its been eating me, I'm not evolved enough to handle it.
>>29737150
WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT'S THE SITUATION CAPTAIN?
ANYONE GOT THE SCREENCAP?
>>29737460
Anon, no bully
>driving home at night
>get very paranoid that someone is in my backseat about to kill me
>spit out an orange seed onto the ground
>get worried a stalker will pick it up and clone me
>start hearing music while showering, when none is playing
>get worried someone is spying on me through my webcam
>cover it up with a little sticker
I may be developing schizophrenia
>Someone says something to me
>Automatically respond
>They look at me like I'm insane and say "uhhhh... what?"
>Suddenly realize that I said either total gibberish or something completely irrelevant to what they asked me
Does anyone else do this by accident? Say things that don't make sense or even non-words when they try to go on autopilot? I feel like I have a grasp of my mental health but I've started to notice little things like this and other weird tics with my speech that concern me (lack of control over volume, people tell me I have strange cadence when I talk naturally, find myself mouthing words to myself after I finish speaking if I'm not paying attention)
>>29737474
Put that ankle in a plastic cast or at least one of those velcro ones and get crutches right-the-fuck-now.
t. anon who didn't do the above and ankle has not properly healed 1 year later
>>29737602
Since you're able to tell those things are not normal I doubt it's schizophrenia. I would say bipolar but your writing style seems too relaxed for a manic person so maybe borderline. They can experience brief psychosis when particuarly stressed or after a breakup.
>>29737614
Not even meming,I'm fairly sure those are symptoms of autism.
I started having repetitive visions and dreams of me being in some white void, controlling and administrating the universe. Everything seemed like a weird joke, everything was off. Then, I had visions of me becoming a God because I figured out how the human brain worked. I feel like I saw things that my conscious should not have seen.
>>29737625
where I do get one of those? It's 2 AM after a holiday
>>29737734
What drug ?
schizophregano
>>29737472
pcpbot, how long is it since you last took it ? been around a year for me now, and im kind of missing it. It was goddamn awful while i did it, especially the days (sometimes weeks) after.
But now im absolutely apathetic, and im kinda craving it.
What was your roa ?
>not getting much sleep
>constantly feel like something bad is going to happen
>dreams are about how I'm going to have to pay for my mistakes one day
>have no one to vent to
>whenever I'm doing anything I reimagine the scenario if I had friends/roomates
>sex drive is gone due to constant levels of stress and anxiety
>sex drive is gone because penis is aware there's no women around and that I can't trick penis into being happy through masturbation
>constantly remember things that aren't real
>having trouble know what time/day/year it is
>having trouble remembering what I'm supposed to do
>computer desk squeaks when I type so I avoid staying on too late because I don't want to wake the
>>29737752
Mostly just LSD + DXM.
>>29737737
You have any 24/7 Walgreens or CVS near you? They might have something
>>29737460
>tfw got misdiagnosed and now I can exploit neetbux if I bothered
>>29737819
I have a weird suggestion: try talking out loud to yourself, saying positive and sensible things.
I have a theory that anxiety / depression is somehow the opposite of schizophrenia, and by behaving a bit more schizophrenic you might get some spark back.
>>29737865
Not him but I have anxiety and depression and I talk to myself all the time.
>>29737286
(A combination of ascii characters the bot has never seen)
>>29737898
Do you mean that it's a symptom, or that it helps?
>>29737472
>>29737516
good to know. I was about to get some 3meopcp, might give it a miss now.
>>29737819
dont want to wake the..?
JEDI SCUM *koffel*
>>29737911
Neither, should have made that clear. It has no relationship at all.
>>29737830
This. And pick up some DM cough syrup. To get high on.
>>29737988
>>29737830
>>29737737
don't robotrip kids, you'll end up seizing like lil wayne. be a normal human and buy black market drugs off the deep web.
>>29737918
I gotta say it is imo one of the most intense drugs there is. Id say try it- The thing you have to be prepared for especially dou is that pcp will make you feel a very special, impossible to describe feeling for days afterwards. It literally feels like you are going batshit crazy and is like nothing i have ever experienced with any other drug. Right now its over a year that i took it, but i remember exactly how these "episodes" felt. There simply arent words for it.
>>29737150
lost my mind long ago AMA
>>29737150
I'm pretty close I think.
I've started to talk to myself and repeat things in a very *crazy* way.
I still feel sane and don't have delusions. I did have a period earlier this year where I thought I was dying. Weeks. But I had just quit drugs so I think it was related to that.
>>29737602
I have my webcam covered up with tape as well anon
>>29738013
That nigga drank that shit every single day of his life for years.
I'm talking one night while he sits on /r9k/ and robotrips like a proper fucking robot.
>>29738151
i guess robotripping WOULD be in the theme with r9k.
>>29737988
Nah, just do this:
>buy codeine/acetaminophen tablets
>crush into powder
>dissolve in lukewarm water (no more than 1/2 cup, less is better)
>stir vigorously
>leave to cool to room temperature
>put in freezer until very cold but not frozen (must not freeze)
>pour through filter (coffee filters, kitchen cloths, kitchen towels and t-shirts all work - filter should be damp before use) into fresh glass
>strain filter into glass to get out the remaining drops
>throw away filter and all solids
>drink remaining water
>get high from codeine
A lot of sites will say the water has to be clear or almost clear but often it will be milky white because of the binders in the tablets. As long as you use the right amount of water it's literally impossible for it to contain a dangerous amount of APAP. At 0 C the solubility of APAP in water is about 7 mg / ml which means 1 cup of filtered water can't contain more than 700 mg of paracetamol (safe doses are up to 4 g).
>>29738228
This is such a shit tier way to get high.
>>29737172
THE RlDE NEVER ENDS
>>29738433
Have you tried it? I like it, a codeine buzz can be really nice if you take enough (I usually can't get more than 256 mg this way unless I go to multiple pharmacies). I especially like codeine combined with weed and beer, but it's also good alone when you can't get the other two for whatever reason.
In the UK, 256 mg worth of codeine tablets costs GBP 2.50 so it's a cheap as fuck way to get high.
p.s. Should've mentione in previous post that you should take antihistamine too because codeine makes you itchy.
>>29737286
>he hears the beep
run, and tell no one
I went through that faze. If you do it right and not kill yourself/others or become a complete junkie life actually gets easier. I mean I still hate life but I hate it with kindness to the point where almost nothing bothers me anymore.
>>29737286
Getting high as fuck and seeing things isn't a psychotic break you fucking normalfag.
>>29739573
You havent met general Sherman have you ?
>>29737150
OP, I would like you to join me on Tinychat and for both of us to scream as loud as we can and for as long as we can until something happens. Don't disappoint me.
>every time I play shit or listen to music,and then stop, I get the impression that people were talking/doing shit around me
>when I wake up in the morning, I feel like a ton of noise finally just stopped and everything just turned nice and quiet
>rarely, small/common noises around me sound weird or creep me out.
My mom's undiagnosed schitzo, do you think I may be developing something?
>>29737286
It wasn't as bad as this but I sometimes think that advertisments are giving me secret messages and that people around me are ayy lmaos, and this is all completely sober
I think I could be right but everyone tells me I'm crazy
>>29739819
Not at all anon, don't get to paranoid buddy.
The chance you have it is no bullshit, less then 1%. Also even if you do, your life wouldn't be over faggot.
Don't be such a pussy, try eating better and keeping your mind on things that can better your life.
It's normal to think you have mental health issues but in reality not to many do.
I'm not saying to not be aware but just think positive and don't be such a pussy. If it gets serious or you really think you do, then go in. But remember how much othr shit you've thought you've had
Can anyone help I'm afraid I might be schizo
I have constant fears that people are watching me or have cameras in the bathroom and sometimes I think everyone secretly hates me and I'm constantly terrified of worms crawling in me or parasites in my food or insects laying eggs and biting me and spiders getting in my clothes and when I close my eyes I'll see things sometimes and they won't go away until I open them again and it's very hard to eat and it's hard to sleep, I'm hearing people say my name or my phone ring when it didn't happen
Help me robots I don't want to be insane
>>29739573
Well, it is, but it's substance induced psychosis, and doesn't make you mentally ill to experience it.
>>29739963
Why a pussy? Also never had anything to be happy about. I can't remember a time when I didn't have crippling depression. Can't remember when I last felt positive about anything, and when I look back at my childhood, I realise I always played along, rather than enjoy/be part in something. It feels like I've always been so disconnected from everyone and everything that I ever interacted with..I've also attempted to end it about twice but lost all motivation and just cried my self to sleep
>tfw 24 years old and still cybering with foreign girls in a video game and crying yourself to sleep at night because that's all you're ever gonna geti lied, i cant even cry anymore, im numb inside
tfw
>>29740020
I kinda feel like that all the time. Paranoid af, I even unplug the phone just to not hear it ring any more. Can't tell if it's something I'm listening to, or just the phone, some times.
>>29738013
lil wayne is/was doing lean not dxm
>>29737734
Anon I do know how brains work. It just contributes to my view that we are all pathetic animals and Google DeepMind's children in 20 years will be running circles around us. CAPTCHA confirms, lol.
>>29740196
ive never cybered before what is it like
>>29740178
Because you're not trying.
You're making excuses.
Listen, even if you do have crippling depression you can fight through but instead you take the path that feels better, to jsut sit and wallow in self pitty like a pussy.
Take control of you're fucking life anon.
I believe in you and so do others, it's time you fucking do. You're in a fight for your fucking life and it's time you become the person you want.
Everyone feels disconnected and weird, no one has a huge sense of belonging growing up. Imagine what fags must of felt like.
Anon, eat better, exercise, and talk to girls.
You could completely change your life if you took intiative
>>29740339
It's not as simple as you're putting it, some people do need a psychologists help, or medication to take away from the fatigue a but, but you're essentially correct in saying that the only way to recover is to force yourself to.
If your life is complete shit, and you're unhappy about it, you're never going to feel good unless you improve your life.
>paranoid parents want to kill me (at least I hope I'm paranoid) won't eat food or drink anything o one else will.
>Frequent hallucinations like bugs crawling on my skin and bugs and animals out of the corner of y eye, also hear whispers and people screaming
> Don't know what day it is most of the time
>have trouble forming basic sentences and stumble over my words all the time.
>My senses feel dulled
Am I schizophrenic?
>>29740395
People need to stop asking these questions here. No-one here is qualified to diagnose you at all, none of us really even properly understand all the presentations of schizophrenia.
And even if we were, a few self reported symptoms aren't enough for anyone to diagnose you, even a qualified psychiatrist couldn't do it.
If you're concerned you might be suffering from a mental illness, talk to your GP, ask for a referral to whichever psychiatrist he feels is best for your case, and trust what they think.
>>29740330
makes me feel empty inside every time
>>29740395
see a doctor. you could have a brain tumor or some other neurological problem. not something to post about on the internet.
>>29740339
I'm not whining or wallowing here, I'm just describing the constant shit that's happening to me. And I'm not trying to change or improve either, I don't care and don't see the point in it. I literally can't see an endgame that would be appealing or anything worth bothering with. I tried to end it just because I felt there was no point in being around any more.
Also I get my rest and my home cooked food or w/e but still get weird paranoid feelings some times.
Having those and knowing that depression is a symptom of schizophrenia, kinda makes me a lil bitparanoidabout it. All I want is answers, not "improvement".
>>29740522
Not him, but you pretty much just are wallowing, going you can't remember a time when you weren't depressed, and that you've tried to end it twice. That's just wallowing.
Also, depression isn't even a symptom of schizophrenia, it's just that a lot of schizophrenic patients have depression as well. Of the amount of people with depression though, the amount that also have schizophrenia is fucking tiny.
Like how plenty of people with lung cancer have coughs, but you'd be dumb to assume you've got lung cancer because you've got a cough. Except even less logical, as at least a bad cough can be a symptom of cancer.
>>29737521
>enlightened myself
How? (I'm assuming the pill was metaphorical)
>>29740573
Here. I have almost everything in the first bit https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Schizophrenia
except for substance abuse, that is.
And I do have a few beliefs that feel real to me but would sound insane when mentioned. Can't talk about them at all.
>>29740650
After watching the video explanation, I can say with certainty that I have at least 70% of the symptoms...
>>29740650
Schizophrenia is a disorder that cannot be self diagnosed mate, it's pretty much defined by lack of insight.
You can't just look at a list of symptoms and go "yeah that's me". Pic related.
>tfw dont know if what im living is real
>i could actually be in a mental hospital biting my lips and shitting myself in a straight jacket
>my life might just be a product of my imagination
>i have no way of ever knowing
I fucking hate everyone and everything in this world FUCK YOU ALL
>>29737150
Just got a job and anxiety is leaving me dripping with sweat when I work
I keep getting these bursts of EXTREME frustration with people. I feel caged in.
The only thing which solves it is boozing hard, and blazing might cause the best short term resolution but it makes me feel like shit for days afterwards
>>29740507
>>29740420
Tried seeing a psychiatrist by with my shit insurance the soonest i could schedule an appointment was January of next year
>>29740866
I feel like if I accept that I'm not God/the main character, and consider some form of insanity and just give in, the system will pull me in and I would get trapped and lose my self forever. I feel like someone wants me to fall for it.
>>29741370
There's no public mental health services where you are?
Anyone else ever turn gay during their psychotic breaks? I can't stop fapping for cute bois and this is highly irregular for me. I even started shaving my legs and starving myself so I look more like a twink. Just kill me now
>>29741925
Hoah I'll do more than kill you, boi.
*unzips BBC*
>>29737150
Been on anti-psychotics since 2012.
Also in mental and physical rehab.
And while i'm not in some designated activity, i play the vidya and watch TV / animu at home.
>>29741947
This wouldn't even be a bad thing for me at this point. I'd probably fuck anyone. I am almost at the point where I might just start sending nudes on Grindr and begging some gay old dude to pick me up and fuck me. What the hell is wrong with me. I used to just be a shut in nerd that never spoke to anyone
>>29737446
it never gets better.
oregano.
i used to be paranoid as fuck as a young teenager
i used to be trying to get to sleep and my family laughing at tv downstairs made me think that i was on a camera show and they were laughing at me, and at anything I did
fucked me up for a few months
>>29741644
There is but only in my states capital, Ill look into it though
All consumption is death for the consumed. Yet all must eat, so we all bring damnation to one creature or another.
>>29742233
It's beautiful in a way
I don't eat for last week because I feel like I don't deserve it and I'm trying to starve myself to death.
But I know I must eat so sometimes I take something or drink a lot of water (or cola) because I might get fat after I will start eating again.
I feel so bad after I eat something. I'm in depression and feel like I shouldn't waste money on me and I personally think that it's a form of self-harm. I have taste to eat something but I can't due to my mind that says that I'm not worthy.
I like to think I'm a normie but I'm pretty sure I've got some AVPD since I had a weird childhood. I supress it a lot but there are times where I just cannot go outside unless it's to somewhere I know it's quiet and lightly trafficked out of anxiety. It had flair ups I guess, some times I'm fine other times I'm completely reclusive. Still have a GF and such so I guess I'm not a lost cause. I also rarely have my blinds open in my apartment and always unplug my webcam when I'm not using it out of fear of someone spying on me. I'm not crazy am I?
>>29737286
I had a similar experience last year. I thought society was about to collapse and government agents were going to silence me with drones for "knowing too much".
It was around the time that color changing dress was going around the internet. Basically a person's perception of the dress was an indicator of whether or not they were marked. Those who were marked would essentially become zombies under the control of the NWO after microchips in our brains were activated . Those who were not marked would fight back until the "creator" returned and wiped everything from the earth.
I thought i was marked and would lose my mind at any second without any way of stopping it.
Not nearly as bad as any of you guys here, but I've just had a delusion shattered in the last few days and I'm bummed the fuck out about it. I was always ugly, and I started to genuinely believe that I got suddenly good-looking at 19, like an ugly duckling. Turns out nope, still ugly. I don't know how the fuck people deal with it. It was so nice not having that insecurity for the last year, and now its just crushing down on me.
>had gf when I was 16
>she broke up with me after a month
>didn't even get to lose my kiss-virginity
>still think about her daily
>can't stop thinking about her because she was the only girl to ever show interest in me
>Have been at the point where I would date anyone with a vagina, for a while now
>just want someone to cuddle with, don't care about her looks
>still constantly lonely
>this is despite the fact that I'm 6'2", 150lbs, and I normally get a 7/10 in rate threads, so this shouldn't he happening
driving me insane desu I don't wanna die alone
>>29737695
>maybe borderline. They can experience brief psychosis when particuarly stressed or after a breakup.
Can this also happen due to sheer fear alone?
>>29742360
helllll no. have you ever seen those websites where people tap into cameras and webcams? i plain don't own a web cam cus of that shit, fuck that.
>>29743474
Do you actually go outside your room?
>>29740587
it was metaphorical and I don't know, just a combination of being autistic and always being existential
>>29737919
He died, anon.
Right then.
