Loss Thread
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You are currently reading a thread in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001
You are currently reading a thread in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001
Who else here lost people they love? Share your story, lets start a loss circle.
>be me
>visit terminal friend in hospice tonight
>stream fireworks on lap top
>hum our favorite song and hold their hand until they fall
Asleep
>nurses give me sad smiles and quiet goodnight as I leave
>be me
>eating dry cereal in the back of my car listening to emo music Rn
This isn't the first I've lost to death
>best friend killed himself last year in October
>it was all of a sudden, got a call from his mom who was hysterical
>a friend jo just dropped me my freshman year of highschool because I was too depressed for her
>omegle friend leaves after I make a bad joke even though they do the same all the time
I have a few more in case anyone wants to hear them too.
>>29733283
My mom killed herself, I miss her very much and it bothers me everyday. I'll never get over it. I have a suicidal friend who has been suicidal for a long while that im scared of losing
>>29733283
I lost my mom last year, I think she wanted to die but couldn't bring herself to actually commit suicide to not hurt anyone and for religious reasons. Stopped taking her heart meds, stopped eating almost entirely, and even had an entire day to go to the hospital but refused saying it was ok, that's why I think she knew and it hurts me deeply realizing it only later.
ive never lost anyone, im 21. pretty sure its going to fuck me up real good when someone like my mum dies
>>29733489
Fug forgot to mention it was a heart attack, her symptons started at noon and died just past 1am, she liked to watch forensic shit on tv and most likely knew what was going on. I can't stop thinking and feeling guilty about it.
I lost my dad and nearly lost my mom. I'm extremely grateful to still have her in my life.
>>29733283
>first grandfather died in 1996, pretty close to Remembrance Day
>i was 10, so i started grade 6
>i remember crying in some sort of Remembrance Day ceremony
>everyone thought i was crying because of RD, but i was crying because my poppy died
this past year and a half was the worst, though
>grandma (who was married to the above grandpa) died suddenly in January 2015
>was shook up about it
>got over it pretty quickly, shortly after her her service
>other grandma died in April 2015
>was at work at the time
>felt worse that mom (ie nan's daughter) didn't tell me straight away - it was a cousin who said she was sorry
>didnt feel as sad as i should after her death, but it was still a sad time
>grandpa died a few months ago
>he had dementia
>watching him struggle with dementia was harder to watch than his death
>he had a cabin with a small garden (which was his pride), spent most of his time at that, or hanging out with a couple of his close friends and family members
fuck
>>29733489
>>29733595
hey anon, OP here. I'm really sorry you lost your mom in such a seemingly dragged out and painful way. I really hope you don't beat yourself up over this too much because you have to know it isn't your fault.
>>29733366
Try and reach out to this friend as much as you can. I have to tell you, losing someone to suicide is one of the worst pains i've ever felt. things unanswered, things unfinished, things unsaid, its just a big mess.
>>29733795
OP here, jeez anon I'm really sorry. I remember losing my grandparents too. Both suffered in the end right before they left and I definitely have to agree that watching that was worse than losing them to death
>>29733853
yeah, watching him turn from basically the most well-rounded person i knew/know to an invalid was worse than watching him die. (he was admitted to the hospital shortly before his death, and i was in his room for a few hours the night before his death,)
anyway. you're a saint, OP. i'm not good with words, especially for something as delicate as death. as such, i'm not sure what to say. just keep positive, ok? you're six feet above ground, instead of six feet underground. even if you have depression, keep chugging away.
>>29733814
Thanks for reading anon, I sometimes think I should see a therapist because this eats me at times and this is one of the few things one can't discuss much on imageboards, partly due to the edgy nature and partly due to the majority of anons having most of their loved ones alive or not having/not giving a fuck about them. I talked with her family and were a bunch of hypocrite fucking cunts who basically it was her fault, no wonder she felt that way. Damm, I still have dreams about her and wake up with the intention of asking for my favourite dish, then remember she's gone.
>>29733283
I still think about her from time to time. Wondering what she's doing, if school is okay and about her fencing. I try to message her every now and then on skype, saying i'm sorry and if she's okay. She probably can't read them though because she blocked me....
i don't know man. losing someone you really like sucks.........
>>29734341
I mean the biggest problem with you is
>marrying an autistic girl is a bad thing to you
Sure, chase your Stacies you'll never see eye to eye with on anything, share any common ground with, or enjoy recreation with that isn't sex.
>>29734341
i love seeing this guy post. mental illness is a wonderful thing to behold.
my condolences, robots. I have never lost a loved one and I can't imagine the pain.
>>29734341
>Stacy gives you a little attention
>You become obsessed with her
Even if you really like her, women are just regular people. Don't put them on a pedestal and think they're amazing for doing something simple like talking to you.
Calm down and find another girl, Anon. Being obsessed creeps women out anyway.
Normies killed every single thing that I enjoyed doing so I have to force myself to be interested in increasingly obscure things in an attempt to find something that normies won't touch.
>>29734480
but there's only one gold fish in the entire sea.................................................. <>< ..........................
>avoid getting close to people
>family included
>feel avoided
feelsgoodman
>>29734225
hey man, we're all the same in some way, and losing someone you love really fucking hurts and can have a big impact on you. I'm going to try and keep pushing because it's all I can do now but it's tough. you know that.
>>29734264
ah it's really okay anon. I WANT to read these things and chat with people who get what I'm feeling. it helps me not be so sad about it.
and hey, if it helps, ill share a quick tip. my best friend who killed himself loved lemon cookies. when i particularly miss him a lot, ill make some cookies and eat a few. sometimes it really hurts and i get sad again but sometimes it helps and i smile for a bit. idk maybe it could help to make something your mom always loved? help you feel closer to her i mean
>>29734341
OP, please read above and think again. i don't think you get how a lot of us in this thread are feeling. also, you need to move the fuck on and get over this girl. i don't get why you'd put so much into someone when they won't even bat an eye at you
>>29734525
>>29734525
I know that everyone is their own person and different and all that snowflake stuff, and that you really like this girl, but you're only holding yourself back by crushing on her this hard.
You've scared her away now, and you're only going to make yourself feel worse thinking about her again and again. You'll have to find someone else, and there are other girls out there who you could talk to and try to get with. You're not going to embrace any new girls who might be interested in you until you let go of this one. The sooner you let go of someone who clearly isn't interested in you, the sooner you'll possibly find a girl who likes you back. There are other beautiful women on the planet, nice ones too.
I remember that thread. Wasn't that a couple months ago, at least? You've got to pull yourself together. You can't just leap in and instantly fall in love the second a pretty girl gives you some attention. You'll drive yourself crazy doing that. Just try to stay detached for a while and think rationally when first meeting women.
>>29734794
Thanks for that. What you said was one of the most rational and truthful thing's I've read about in a long time. It's so easy to get lost in yourself, I've found out. Like a cycle that never stops, to the point where you don't even think anymore.
You're entirely right. thanks anon. i'll try and give it my best.
bye goldie. thanks for what you did that night, it really meant a lot. and i'm sorry that i scared you. i'll try to stop thinking about you now, it's the least i could do right... hope everything goes okay and you make it to the australian olympic fencing team and get into a good college and meet someone you love. you deserve that. you're so perfect. i'll miss you goldie. i'll miss you beatrice. i really will. here's to life..
bump
- love an anon who likes reading these from afar
>>29733695
How? Car accident?
>>29734625
Thanks for the tip anon, it sucks I didn't care enough to learn her cooking when she offered to teach me and now all I have is a vague idea of how to cook like her. Other things that help is taking care of what our loved ones leave, I've been taking care of her garden with mild success and I feed a dog that sometimes likes to sleep in front of our door that she fed when coming home. Small things like this alleviate the grief a bit.
>be me
>be 12
>mom kisses my forehead before bed
>she tells me story and then leaves after i sleep
>wake up super late to cat meowing loudly
>go into mom's room to try and find her
>mom is lying in bed, blood all over the sheets, wrists cut
i spent three hours crying with my mom's dead body before i called the ambulance and let them take her away from me
i hate women because it was a woman that took the one think i loved the most away, and that was her very self. my dear mother
>>29734794
>You've scared her away now
She was literally never going to be in a real (or fake) relationship with him.
>>29735853
the smallest things sometimes bring the biggest relief, you know? thats how i feel when I make the cookies, or do small things that'll remind me of him
>>29735923
I know. It's just that even the slightest hope of one for him, or just her company, is totally gone. That's what I meant, I knew she wasn't interested in him that way.
>>29734918
Any time.
Man, Stacies really have some kind of scary power over men.... :^(
here's your bump
>brother has cancer
>develops lung infection
>on lung machine
>infection gets worse and doctor says he won't make it
>lung machine is unplugged and he is injected with a large dose of morphine
>he jolts up and gasps for air with his eyes wide open
>fluid from his lungs spill out as he gasps for air
>drowns to death in bed
>>29736608
thank you for the bump b, and I'm sorry to hear abut your brother
>be me
>get a phone call while I'm at home
>wife is in hospital, it's urgent
>walk into the hospital expecting the worst
>receptionist solemnly points me to wife's room
>talk to the doctor outside
>he looks grim and explains my wife has miscarried
>finally enter the room
>wife is in the fetal position (cruel irony) gently sobbing
>I am dumbfounded by the loss of my wife's son
>some faggot draws a shitty comic about it and our pain becomes an internet meme
| ||
|| |_
>>29736800
wait what are you serious, a comic?
>>29736864
>wife's son
He's memeing you, that said, care to post the comic >>29736800 ?
>>29736954
>>29736864
Search "loss" on Google Images.
>>29736980
I mean "loss comic".
>have autistic brother with a few suicide attempts
>he's actually an asshole and not that autistic
>he's a drug addict
>one day he grabs a bike lock and threatens to 'bash my face in' because of a petty argument
>I take it from him and beat him pretty bad with it to assert dominance
>while he's lying on the ground I pretty much try to get him to kill himself because I'm angry
>say things like how hopelessly retarded and a burden to everybody and nobody will ever love him and all that sort of shit
>next day he OD's
>feel nothing
>it takes time to process I guess
>weeks later it hits me very briefly
>nobody knows I probably caused it
>can't tell anybody about this even if I wanted to obviously because I'd be arrested
dem feelerinos...???
He was an asshole and a liar. He deceived everybody around him who was stupid enough to let him. He was also basically worthless as a human being. I feel very conflicted because I don't actually care all that much that he's dead (in fact my life is better) but I know people say I should. Its strange. I felt sad when my dog died and stuff but with this I just got over it after 10 minutes of feeling bummed out.
I hear people in movies say things like that they don't know how they should feel but I know exactly how I should feel but I just don't. This makes me a little depressed because it makes me feel lonely that I'm alone in this reaction.
This is perhaps the edgiest thing I've ever written down actually when reading it over. I'm posting this for me I guess.
My Great-Grandma passed away July 4, 2013
She was like my Mother. She raised me and I lived with her. I was only 19 at the time. I cried so hard for months when I went to bed at night that I would have sore throats and major migraines. I couldn't deal. I ended up taking money I had and moving to another state. I met a good guy that got me a job in the company he owned and even offered to buy a prostitute for me when he heard I was a virgin. He hasn't been the best influence (has always tried taking me to strip clubs, getting into drugs, etc.) but he makes sure I'm not lonely. He recently lost his son to Scoliosis and always compares me to him. He takes me to sporting events and stuff too and forces me to go out.
>>29737347
You're being offered an easy path into the normie world, anon. Don't miss what may be your only chance.
>>29737265
OP here. As someone who's dealt with abusive people and their ways, I get how you feel when you say you don't feel much
Don't think into it too much
If I were you I wouldn't feel much either for the bastard
>>29733283
Lost my ex gf of a year.5, not to death but her being a cheating whore
>been dead inside since birth
>finally meet a girl I can talk to and do shit with and have actual fun
>8/10 face 10/10 body
>im barely 6/10 kinda fat
>love gril more than life itself
>tells me "anon, I know how much you love and respected ur great gpa, so I want to name our first born son anon after him"
>in process of buying ring
>she got of BC so I could get her pregnant
>turns out last 2 months we were together she was cheating on me and is still with same piece of shit and him knowing full well his whole relationship is a cheating lie and doesnt care
>now all I do is get drunk, fuck hookers and cry myself to sleep every night before I have to go wageslave in the fucking heat or cold or go PT for millitary service so I can go die in a war so my family will love me
>all this could easily been avoided had she not been a cheating whore
The vaginal jew lads, not even once
>>29733283
I do feel like I destroy everything I touch. Eventually enough of the people you cared about leave and you start askin yourself, maybe it is me, maybe I am the devil they think I am. I am alone for a reason I guess, I'd be nice to start winning some people back but I know it will never happen.
>a friend jo just dropped me my freshman year of highschool because I was too depressed for her
Right in the feels.
