Do you have any physical/mental illnesses? What is the worst part about them? How do they affect day to day life?
Hypercalciuria
>pass a calcium crystal (like a kidney stone, but clear) each month
>dilation of my left uriter causes 8 hours of overwhelming pain
>stay curled up into a ball while it's happening
>my dick just burns a little while I eventually pee it out and then the pain subsides
Schizoaffective Disorder
>put in loony bin
>scared shitless all the time
>worst part is the empty feeling. I call it "the void"
>the void makes me feel so physically uncomfortable and emotionless that I want to crawl out of my skin
>auditory Hallucinations are distracting and sometimes spooky
How about you guys?
>>29681130
I should also add that my hydronephrosis in my left kidney is where the calcium collects and forms crystals. It's getting smaller with age though. When I was 14, I used to vomit from the pain.
Holy crap anon. This sucks! Sorry to read that...
For me, I guess I'm pretty depressed. Doesn't really compare though.
>>29681130
why even live? like im not telling you to off yourself, im geniuenly asking, i want a reason like that. like if i had any physical condition that shitty i would sleep on the tracks
>>29681535
The kidney stuff is getting better with age. Each dilation is less painful than the last. I had one yesterday, and I just had to lay down for a few hours with moderate pain. It used to be so painful that I would cry for hours though. Women typically say it's more painful than labor and childbirth. It used to be the worst pain imaginable for me. I have choosen to live because I'm relieved once the pain is over. I have also popped pain killers like candy for the last year of it. The void feeling has replaced it now as my primary torture. Words cannot describe how terrible it feels. It actually makes me want to kill myself immediately when it happens.
>>29681533
OP here again. I wouldn't underestimate the power of depression. Im schizoaffective, which is a meshing of schizophrenia and bipolar II. The mood swings were cyclical and came before the psychotic symptoms. When I was depressed, I would lay in bed the entire day holding back tears for no reason. I felt like I had the flu because my body felt disgusting like I was sick. Luckily, I actually no longer have any depression due to a combo of 2 medications:
Zoloft:
>makes it so you cant go as deep into depression
Venlafaxine
>makes you happier and more energized
I would reccomend it. I have tried 5 antipsychotics though, and all of them only somewhat work and have horrendous side effects.
>>29681130
Borderline Personality Disorder
>Everyone thinks I'm a massive cunt
Psychosis
>Spent a few days covering my bedroom walls with blood (still not fully cleaned)
>Overdosed 3 times in a week (each time needing to be put on machines)
>Huge scars all over arms (which now look horrible)
>Have to take anti-psychotics or I meltdown
and the worst partI'LL NEVER GET A BF WHO CAN DEAL WITH THIS
>>29682227
>"fembot" comes in to derail the thread
Gg
>>29682254
How am I derailing the thread?
The post was relevent
>>29681130
autism i guess, not that bad considering that i would suck anyways. (somtimes it makes some comfy osu maratons :^)
>>29682295
Why was your gender important to your post? What is the point of including it? What does it add, other than getting more attention? After all, you have BPD, so you can't resist that little extra attention, can you?
>>29681130
autism
generalized anxiety disorder
psychosis
sertraline 100mg
olanzapine 20mg
>>29682324
>I guess
Self diagnosed?
>>29682351
My gender isn't in the post you sperg
>>29682373
>psychosis
You can't have a "psychosis" diagnosis though. Do you mean psychotic disorder NOS?
>>29682380
I've dated girls about as crazy as you. Are you hot?
BPD with all the accessories. My OCD is bananas.
Homeless because I can't deal with anything.
JUST
I have schizoaffective disorder too. I know what you mean by the void. It's weird because I used to call it that as well. I used to only get it at certain moments when I was a kid, like I'd become so depersonalized that everything around me felt like it was a video game or something. It'd be so intense that I'd just lie down in my backyard, on top of some leaves, and I'd feel completely empty and have almost no thoughts. Now I get it a lot more often, although it's not so intense that I have to lie down. I don't really feel anything most of the time.
I get weird delusions a lot, as well as hallucinations. Usually they're religious, but sometimes they're just unimaginably horrible things. Children being sold into slavery, innocent people being raped, tortured, and murdered, and all of it being run systematically by people high up in the government. I get this feeling inside me that I've seen something so evil that I couldn't bear living knowing it, like it's just completely destroyed me, and I want to kill myself just to make it end.
>>29682380
>I'LL NEVER GET A BF WHO CAN DEAL WITH THIS
Hmmm...
I haven't been to a doctor about it but I'm pretty sure I have an irregular heartbeat. I also have gyno and scoliosis
>>29682389
Not really sure, all I know is I'm getting dealt with by a unit that exclusively deals with first episodes of psychosis so I thought that would mean I have psychosis
Asthma
>run to get on the train
>breathe loud and heavily
>have pe
>have to use asthma spray all the time
>can't do physically demanding jobs
>can't go to the military
>feel like a subhuman all the time
slightly nearsighted
>can't drive car without glasses
>don't wear glasses when reading and writing
>people think I'm fakin it
>>29682223
Oh OK. Thanks anon. I should probably really look into medication... I haven't been diagnosed but there's no way in hell I don't have major depression (since I was a kid probably). I don't really believe in therapy (for people like me, and I can't afford it anyway), but it sounds like the meds can help.
Also, damn, your pain threshold must be pretty high with your other thing?
>>29682424
You probably have a form of psychosis then. Psychosis isn't a diagnosis itself though. You probably have schizophrenia or psychotic depression.
>>29681130
Chronic knee pain and bad posture lol
>>29682455
It's pretty high yeah. I broke my wrist in 2 places three years ago and I was perfectly calm. It burned and ached a lot, but it was nothing compared to the internal pain I get in my back.
>>29682395
I don't know, probably not
>>29682419
OP asked what the worst part was.
I answered
My feet and ankles are deformed, dont remember the name of the condition tho.
>running = pain
>walking = pain
>litterally just standing = pain
fuck man
>>29682461
thanks for the help clearing that up, I'll be sure to ask the next doctors I see if they have any plans on diagnosing me
>>29681130
>bipolar
obviously the high phases can be quite good, but when I look back on my behaviour on a down period I just feel so embarrassed and ashamed of my behaviour and my delusions.
Thankfully I don't get too manic and start a busines or anything.
I can compare it to being black out drunk and finding out what you did in the morning. Something that has coincidentally happened to me numerously.
>>29681130
Depression and obesity
Not sure if obesity should be considered an illness, though the only road to recovery is made so much harder by just being as heavy as I am. I can't exercise so I can't get healthy.
Will an hero soon.
>>29682418
Can you describe "the void" in more detail? It's really interesting.
>>29681130
Borderline Personality Disorder and Dissociative Disorder
>high anxiety, panic attacks, dissociative states
>depression, self-harm, constant suicidal ideation
>insomnia, sleep paralysis most nights
>anorexia (due to fear of food, not weight gain)
>recurring delusional states during which I believe brain worms are controlling my thoughts
>been hospitalized twice; once when I was 14 because my weight was too low and once at 17 because I attempted suicide by pills
However, I'm now off anti-psychotics and on Zoloft, which is really helping my anxiety. Therapy is helping me stay sane and control my delusional states.
>>29681130
My knees fucks with me, only hard when I'm walking in stairs tho.
Then hemorrhoids, absolutely disgusting when you taking a shit and the toilet is all bloody, doesn't hurt that much actually, but looks horrible.
Boderline Personality Disorder - makes me feel like a defective/broken human being.
>>29682227
>I'LL NEVER GET A BF WHO CAN DEAL WITH THIS
I could deal with a whole lot of crazy as long as you don't cheat on me or don't try to kill me in my sleep (or at least don't go through all the way with it). But you're not a robot and you must go...
I got a bad skin that gets dry and itchy.
My biggest fear is knives and losing my eyesight.
>>29682553
Or cleaning your ass and find all that bright blood...it makes me dizzy as fuck
>>29682227
>>Have to take anti-psychotics or I meltdown
they're kinda comfy to be honest with you
seroquel keeps me in a nice place and puts me to sleep gently every night
thanks, seroquel
>>29682254
fuck off, only the men who react to gender in these threads are derailing, you massive cuntburger
>>29682548
OP here, so not him, but it is the discomfort caused by feeling empty. It is natural to feel either happy or sad or something in between because it keeps your thoughts occupied. When you feel the void, which is common with people on the schizophrenia spectrum, you feel absolutely nothing. Your thoughts become really blank because you don't have your emotions to charge them. You also cannot feel excited or inspired, so you feel very trapped in the moment. It makes time pass painfully slow and causes physical discomfort due to a lack of occupation for your thoughts.
>>29681130
Don't think it counts as a disease but I am insecure as fuck and have shit low self esteem.
I'm mexican and somehow hate when I see this hot south american fucks with good jobs in my country. It makes me crazy angry and depressed
Scoliosis, far sighted, nose deviation, eczema, possible depression.
Depression obviously hits me the worse. I have to force myself to do anyhing.
>>29682592
t. Fembot or numale
>bipolar one
>acne
>thyroid dying (related to one)
>no other problems despite intense med regiment, thank you lord
i can never be part of society but it's a good life, to be honest
>>29682572
I'm loyal I'd never cheat and I'd probably never kill ANYONE!
>>29682591
That's what I'm taking at the moment "quetiapine" (same thing)
I've been on respiridone, Apripirzole and and whole bunch of anxiety/depression meds
Quetiapine/Seroquel is the best so far
>>29682671
>possible depression
you should get an award for not diagnosing urself with a mental illness on the internet although you had the opportunity
>>29682682
Fembot and why even ask?
Another member of the BPD club. Suicide watch is no fun. Especially when they forget to feed you for two days.
I have completely given up on all my standards, I just don't want to be alone. I'm trying to hold my shit together long enough to get a job and a car. Would you hire someone with bright red cut scars on their arm that clearly could not be from anything else?
>>29682532
Eat less calories than you burn in a day. You can lay in a bed and do nothing and as long as you aren't eating more than your TDEE, you will lose weight.
Generalized anxiety disorder.
Abdominal pain for the last year, had colonoscopies and endoscopies and X-rays. The doctors haven't given me a solid diagnosis except gastritis, or any medicine that works. I've lost about 30 pounds. I'm in pain most of the day now, it's usually not severe pain but it's there, pretty much all the time. It's like a cramp in my abdomen. Feeling it right now.
I've had so many tests, they gave me some medication that didn't help. It keeps me up at night, I can't fall asleep because of the pain, so I'm rolling side to side in my bed for hours some nights.
It's honestly making me feel pretty hopeless, and I didn't have anything good going for me to begin with.
depressed and pretty sure I've got NPD, also just generally mentally ill. my physical health is bad too, at least I'm not fat..
>>29681130
I'm very depressed. Been having hallucinations for the past month, currently being passed between psychiatrists and neurologists to determine what's causing it. I'd honestly rather it be psychological because the idea of a brain tumour or something scares the shit out of me.
>>29682777
have you tried beta blockers / as much as I hate to say benzos?
>>29682741
I didn't ask anything. I made a statement.
>>29682911
Ah, my mistake.
Autism
Can't read most facial expressions and don't pick up on body language/tone of voice and all that.
>mfw piece of shit cunts from older generations literally say "i dont believe in disorders like autism"
I genuinely just want to scream in these cunts ears so they can know what its like for a few seconds.
>>29682865
Yes, both, and other head meds.
I don't think the pain is from my GAD, although sometimes anxiety can cause digestion issues, I think there is something physically wrong that the tests have missed. But I don't know. I had the colonoscopy and that was not easy.
It's gotten to the point where I get home from work and I cannot sit in my computer chair, I have to lay down in my bed. The doctor gave me prescription anti acids but it did not help, I am going back soon.
So I am in discomfort all the time now, I've dropped to about 120 lbs, I have to force myself to eat a lot of the time. It's frustrating not knowing what is wrong
>paranoid delusions
anyone else?
they're over now
>so many years at war with the invading alienscan't start thinking about aliens at all!
>so many years believing I was the messiahcan't start thinking: god (we) did it that way because it was the cleverest, funniest, most meaningful and humble way
proper mental health care is better than whole kingdoms
>>29682992
Eat a lot of peanut butter. It is easy to digest, healthy, and yet caloricly dense. It will help you maintain your brain function and muscle mass too.
>>29682374
no, i denied it and its light autism.
i promise pic related is some shit i do.
>>29683064
i still question it tho, i feel like i can understand people. But what does a retard like me know, i dont even know what it means.
>>29683064
Holy shit. I do all of these. Am I an autist?
>>29683156
resist diagnosis
the autism life isn't so glorious
half the spectrum is just pretend/pejorative
>>29683281
>half the spectrum is just pretend/pejorative
care to elaborate on this?
>>29683046
Thanks that's not a bad idea
I already have a pretty healthy diet, except I am not eating much anymore. My food choices don't seem to effect the pain, it is just always there regardless what I eat or don't eat. I think it is a physical problem because it's always in the same area on the right.
All I know is it's been about a year no fix I'm underweight and I've just about given up. I keep going to work like normal and I will continue to but it is getting harder and harder especially when I have only two or three hours of sleep
>>29683156
lmao maybe, i do more that complies more to the standard behavior, these where some shits that i do. And remember, i do more. i would love to meet and get to know a anon like this somtime, maybe get some perspective on myself.
>>29683365
standard behaviors of autism/not just wierd things
>>29683064
i do everything except walk in circles and everything below it, except for the last one
the only time i talk out loud in the conversations i have is when i'm playing a game. i commentate what i'm doing out loud sometimes but i do it less now.
i do have conversations with people in my head though, just imagine explaining stuff to them, you know?
i don't think i'm an autist tho. my family does, and a child psych from when i was younger. i bet i'm just barely out of the range to be considered an autist.
>>29681130
i suffer from gender dysphoria
it sucks because i can't live comfortably as my birth gender
it affects my daily life bc i think every day of the fact i will never be a real girl
>>29683365
>>29683386
>>29683395
https://www.autismspeaks.org/what-autism/diagnosis/dsm-5-diagnostic-criteria
scroll down passed social pragmatic disorder
>>29683290
some people on the bergers end are just live action role playing a problem because that suits their relationship with mother
for others, a mental health professional examines them and thinks: an anxiety disorder? avoidant? social phobia? ordinary retarded development? lack of socialization? a developmental problem? a mild intellectual disability? an unusual personality? no. look at this little shit. he's pathetic. he's never going to amount to anything. and his mommy pampers him. definitely spectrum."
hence pejorative. they understand the symptoms as autism not because that is the diagnosis they require, but because the individual presents as so exceptionally pathetic.
Bipolar type two
>depressed as fuck almost all the time
>on and off suicidal
>veer towards drug abuse
>three psych ward stays so far
>can't escape the nihilism and apathy most of the time
But
>sometimes get hypomanic and feel fucking great, able to write and interact socially well
I'm pretty sure I have some kind of IBS/Chrohns/colitis type disorder inherited from my mom, which basically just means I need to shit all the time and constantly have diarrhea
>>29683556
>live action role playing a problem because that suits their relationship with mother
what?
>>29682227
>Borderline Personality Disorder
>>Everyone thinks I'm a massive cunt
Because you are. BPD is literally asshole disease.
>>29683556
>t. armchair psychologist NEET
>>29682591
One time I popped one of my friend's seroquel to help with a bad amphetamine comedown. It was great, I slept for 16 hours.
>>29681130
>type 1 diabetes
>hypothyroidism
>major depression
>transgender
type 1 diabetes doesn't make you fat though, I weigh 110 and I'm 5'6
people are usually surprised or just don't believe me
The doctors I've been to haven't been able to diagnose what is going on, but I have utter shit memory and brain fog. Sometimes I end up forgetting things people have only just told me. It's hard to learn things as well. When I'm trying to do what people tell me I always get things jumbled and have to ask them to repeat it nearly everyday. Coupled with your run of the mill anxiety and depression it makes me feel awful.
Its pretty painful not being able to remember clearly what some of the best moments in your life were. Of course, its easier to remember the worse ones since painful events are more impacting.
Bowels are fucked too. Practically anything I eat makes me run to the toilet with diarrhea.
>>29683784
I know your feelings about the bowel shit. I know somethings wrong with mine, but I don't know what.
>>29683484
i read the enitre thing and, well i partly fit the categories, im still critical of it though.
you sound like you weren't meant to live. have you considered suicide?
>>29681130
I'm paranoid about diabetes and degenerative eye diseases, although I don't think I have either one (yet).
I do have mild hearing loss though. I took a hearing test recently and couldn't detect 25dB at 500 hertz in either year.
>>29683784
I have strong learning, memory, attention problems as well, but also coupled with strange feelings inside my head, like blood vessels pumping and pain. Also it seems like I have a general numbness on my whole body, can't feel my movements or touch the way I used to.
It all started in November of 2012, during an Linear Algebra exam. I was good at school and college back then, best grades among my classmates and all that.
Dropped out of college and working in a shitty job that I barely do correctly since I jumble things up, need people to repeat orders for me etc...
I think it was a medication I used during a long period. Interesting to see someone with such a similar description.
>>29683784
Memory issues, brain fog, and shitting liquid are all symptoms of depression.
t. Someone who was treated for bipolar II
