ITT: We share embarrassing childhood memories
>be me
>2nd grade
>back of the school bus talking to all the cool kids
>they were making fun of some loser faggot who sat right behind the bus driver by himself
>calling him gay and shit
>Chad mentions he probably goes to a gay hotel because he's just that gay lulz XD
>me being a curious dumbass says "there's a gay hotel? Really where?" (I didn't want to know because i was gay, I just asked because I wanted to make sure they weren't making it up)
>they all start laughing their asses off
>start laughing with them
>my stop comes next
>while walking home it finally hits me why they were laughing
>sat next to the loser faggot kid who sat behind the bus driver for the next 3 years until middle school
>peed in pants
>cold January morning
>everyone's waiting outside in a line waiting for the teacher to let us in
>some little shit brought a bunch of live roly-polies he collected in his house
>he pours them onto the sidewalk
>he and his buddies are crunching them with their boots
>decide to whiteknight because I like bugs
>try to yell at him
>he slams his face into his palm
>fall backwards onto frozen ground
>wind knocked out of me
>roll down hill
>hit chain link fence
>so in pain
>not enough air in my lungs to cry out
>all the kids laugh at me
>they go inside
>I lie there for a while
>get in trouble for lollygagging
>didn't save a single roly-poly
>>29663310
You could have played that off as if you were joking, faggot. You should have just continued sitting with them.
>grade 8
>went to school with my moms giant, faded, pink, ripped, period stained panties attached to the Velcro on my winter coat
>show up to the playground at 8am or w.e
>kids everywhere
>friend whispers that theres something on my back
>I grab at it and immediately throw it towards him being like "HEY WHY YOU PUT DAT ON MEH YOU FAGGOT!"
>look around
>more kids pointing and laughing
>simmers down a bit
>I'm completely mortified by this time and am just waiting until the entire school catches on and I'm made the laughing stock
>In class
>Look out the window and see the underwear laying there
>Stay inside for last recess
>Look outside again
>Kids picking the panties up with sticks and chasing others with it
Never did ruin me like I thought it was going to.
>>29663310
Peed my pants in 5th grade.
>>29664055
this is so hot
roet[gewg
>>29663856
The general attitude of this board is avoidant. These kinda posters will avoid all social contact because they might have said "yellow" instead of "hello" once accidently.
>shit myself at prom
i normally dont go to shit like that but attendance was mandatory
worse because am grill. pants shitting is probably the only thing that girls get bullied for more harshly than guys, and it was at fucking prom
rip me
>start typing embarrassing story
>get embarrassed
>delete, post this instead
OP this thread is too hard. Make it easier.
>>29664055
>show n' tell
>brings his mothers most decrepit pair of panties
>for demonstation purposes
>lets the children play hoop and stick with said panties
>in return
>they don't force him to commit social sudoku
>9th grade
>Pissed on gym teacher
>>29663310
barely my childhood, I was like 15 or something
>music class
>we had the chance to pick which instruments we wanted to play at the beginning of the year and my mom told me to play the faggoty-ass flute
>every other guy in class picked a Chad instrument like the clarinet or the saxophone, actually there was a tubby Korean guy with me as well, but all the other flute players were girls.
>music class one day
>tubby Korean guy is missing
>random qt flute girl forgot her music binder
>asks if she can sit next to me and follow along
>sweat externally
>it goes by okay for a while
>shredding my flute, almost trying to impress her
>inhale between notes
>booger shoots down my throat
>gag reflex
>fingers clamp up
>play the wrong note
>my flute makes a loud *PHOOOOOEEEEE* noise as I cough on my booger
>booger shoots out of my mouth and flies onto my music sheet
>girl obviously noticed
>rest of the class goes by without other incidents
>never speaks to me again for the rest of my life.
highschool memory
>first day at big boy school
>get on the bus nervous as hell
>sit alone
>girl sits on the seat across the aisle
>throw up half way to school, all water
>whatever hope no one notices
>look over at girl she's clearly distressed
>whatever, get off bus no big deal
>have to go to bathroom first period, stomach hurts
>vomit right after I ask the teacher
>right in front of the whole fucking class
>teacher gets up and asks me why the hell i didn't just go
that basically set the tone for my first two years of high school.
year 3 was weirdo finds a girl he likes and somehow ruins everything. 4th was well shits fucked
good times
>>29663310
I sat right behind the bus driver for almost 4 years of my life. Never had any friends to sit with me, though...
>>29664217
were you wearing a dress, so you were like shitting into an upside-down funnel?
>have my first job interview
>listening to Spotify playlist full of random obscene songs while I wait to be called in.
>get called in for interview
>"Hi anon how are you doing" etc basic interview questions.
>manage to maintain my composure, answer the questions well
>Interview begins to end, sure that I'll get the job.
>iPhone suddenly begins to play a song from playlist
>"I Hate Fucking Niggers" begins to play full volume through my earbuds.
>Interviewer is black, is horrified
>Don't know what to say, try to turn it off but it gets louder
>eventually turn it off and run out of room
>never got job
>why am I even alive
>>29664358
worse, white dress pants.
fancy dresses are expensive and some have uncomfy support structures inside that make you want to end it all
>>29664400
on a scale of 1-10 how would you rate yourself though
a solid 7/10 at my school ended up shitting herself at an after party in white sweat pants. she lost her bfwasn't into scat I guess
she moved on but was known as scatgirl for a bit kek
>>29663310
I used to bark like a dog, run after cars on all fours and drink from a dog bowl
>>29663310
>used to impress(?) kids in grade school during recess by chewing ants mixed with a stick of gum
I think that's where it all started/ended
>>29664521
probably 5/10 at most tbdesu
some cunt splashed chocolate milk on my ass one day and said i shit myself again
someone glued a bunch of pullups to my locker
in one teachers class i asked to use the restroom and he said no, i need the practice holding it
>>29664534
Otherkin Pride World Wide
>>29663801
>He slaps himself
>you fall to the ground
What the fuck?
>be me
>2nd grade
>friends want to do monkey bars
>sounds pretty sweet, chance to be a cool guy by getting across fast
>friends go first, totally fine
>my turn
>idea strikes me
>halfway through, yell, "watch this guys!"
>attempt to swing across half the fucking monkey bars
>fail miserably
>land waaaayyyy too hard on my side than I should have
>makes me feel sick
>embarrassed myself in front of most my class
>bell rings
>walk into class
>still feel sick
>ask teacher to go to nurse's office
"Sure Anon, just ta-
>it's too late
>threw up on her sandals
>the whole class when I threw up on the teacher and ate shit on the monkey bars in the span of five minutes
>>29664395
You dodged a bullet there. Work sucks
>>29664791
That's a cute story. Seriously.
>>29663801
Roly-poly? Is this some american meme? They're called woodlouse you degenerate shitbag.
>>29664905
I'm Dutch and I called them roly-polies too, but I guess I'm indoctrinated by American media
>>29664885
It most definitely wasn't at the time
>>29664905
Common terms for woodlice differ vastly from area to area. Don't be an autist, anon
>>29664768
I definitely meant to write that he slapped me.
>>29664905
Roly-polies/pill bugs are a variety of woodlouse, other kinds of woodlice cannot roll into a ball, like those in the genus armadilladium.
>>29664332
little clarification anon?
>>29664662
You must either be extremely ugly or making all of this up. Going with the second, because women love getting attention and getting the "victim" sympathy treatment.
>>29663696
I'll do you one better
>At downtown Disney in California
>In Lego store
>Building Legos
>Really need to pee
>I'll finish up here then go
>Pee pants
>Entire family has to leave disney early
>12 years old
>>29663310
>first day as a conscious sentient child at a public pool
>pissed in the pool
>didn't leak one out while swimming, I pissed INTO the pool
>never went there again
>>29665605
He really pissed me off,
Oh man.
>Got a school field trip in 1st or 2nd grade to a roller skating place canceled because I not only pissed myself in the bathroom, but I slipped since I was wearing roller skates like a dumbass
>Bit a kid after he mistakenly hit me in the face with a teatherball
>Managed to almost get expelled from 1+2 grade for acting up
>Had a hernia scare around 4, 5 or 6...apparently I asked WAY too many questions to the nurses that would check on me, and made them keep checking my dick and balls because I was scared
>Couldn't go anywhere without a book or a gameboy or some shit to keep me entertained
>Regularly played with my dick in the classroomTurns out I was butt plundered as a kid and that was why
>Drew a lot of dicks
>Would regularly do weird shit like eat ice cream while drinking milk
I was a stupid kid.
>>29665622
or, im only slightly ugly and high school sucks
>>29665739
Exact same thing senpai, although I was like 9 or 10.
>mom brings me to Costco one day
>SNES on display
>no video games at home
>tell mom to buy things and come get me back at the SNES display
>no other kids around so I get to play Super Mario as much as I want
>realize I have to piss
>don't even know if there are toilets in Costco because I'm a dumb kid
>don't even try to look for one
>piss right in my fucking pants without every breaking eye-contact with the TV screen
>somehow figured that the piss would perfectly shoot between my legs and my pants and safely splash onto the floor without ever coming into contact with me
>of course, my pants and shoes and socks all act like a giant sponge
>grey sweatpants too, so it was extra obvious that I had pissed myself
>pretty sure I see some 25 year old Costco worker sigh as he walks past me, but too invested in Mario & Yoshi
>"Anon!?"
>mom's there with groceries
>she just shakes her head
>make up excuses that didn't know where the washrooms were
>mom thinks it's the video games' fault
>didn't start playing video games until I was 23 years old.
>>29665766
90% of the time I have ever been in a swimming pool I have pissed in it
>>29666105
but not while standing on the deck with your infant dick out.
>>29665739
>12 years old
>pissed yourself
>>29665960
how did you manage to shit yourself even? did you just not make it to the bathroom in time? was it like an actual preschool tier accident? your story confuses me
>be in middle school
>at night
>need to wank
>but my brother is awake on the bottom bunk
>open hentai doujin
>cover self and laptop with blanket
>play the super mario bros theme so that he can't hear me
>wank
>dad goes in room for some reason i don't remember
>he asks what the fuck im doing
>startled, i whip the blankets off me in order to see better
>mfw i realized what i just did
>he just leaves
>nobody said anything about it since
>>29664905
I always called them potato bugs
>>29666241
never trust a fart
oregionolio
>>29666336
>has his own laptop in middle school
You will immediately cease and not continue to access the site if you are under the age of 18
>be in middle school
>friend sells those gay sphere pops
>he goes over to a bunch of girls to sell them
>walk away awkwardly
>>29666479
>Had it since 2008
>12 years old then
>12 + 8 = 20
Guess I'm here to stay.
>>29666532
Damn son, what kind of parents let a 12 year old have a laptop in 2008? Sure it's usual now, but things were a bit less shitty even just 8 years ago
>>29664662
That teachers fucked in the head.. all my teachers were decent human beings at least in high school
>>29666562
We weren't all poor kids
>>29666562
I shared it with my brother.
He was playing with his DS at the time of the story.
>>29666562
I got a laptop in 4th grade for my 10 birthday and this was in 2006 I also got a better laptop in 7th grade not even rich my family doesn't even own a house still were staying with family
>>29666599
My family was nowhere near poor, closer to rich if anything. But I guess it's not like I'm better off for not having my own computer when i was young anyway, I'm still a sadfuck /r9k/ browser like the rest of us
>>29666703
True Anon.
So unfortunately true.
>>29666532
>20 year olds grew up on youtube and 4chan
>>29664338
flutes can be pretty manly desu
>be me
>6th grade
>girl in my class takes the bus home with me, lives nearby
>we usually get off at different stops but one day I decide to figure out which house she lives at
>I get off after her and walk down a different street nonchalantly
>duck behind a car real quick while she crosses the street, perfect stealth mode
>look underneath to see where she is
>she turns around and sees my face under the car
>"anon? what are you doing over there?"
>freak out, look under again
>she's walking over
>start running just as she turns around the corner of the car
>put my hood up even though she already knows it's me
>"anon? what are you doing here...?"
>I'm running down the street already
>she follows me a little bit but I freak the fuck out and run into someone's yard and hop the fence onto the next street
>never speak of it
>she never brings it up
>we're friends to this day
>>29666899
she's friends with you so you don't end up snapping and murdering her
>>29664338
>clarinet
>Chad instrument
